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MAY 11, 2017


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Honoring Deserving Children, Youth & Adults ▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼


The Chesed Fund Limited & Project Ezra of Greater Baltimore, Inc. Present



MAY 11, 2017

Safety& Service The Maryland Jewish Community Award for Exceptional Service, Safety, and Security

Sunday, June 4th, 2017 • 1:00pm

2. Include an explanation of why your nominee should be awarded. 3. Provide your full contact infor­ mation as well as your nominee’s.

Winners will be chosen at the discretion of The Chesed Fund and Project Ezra. Dedicated in memory of Philip Kauffman, vwwg, affectionately known as Pop-Pop, who was a proud Jewish World War II veteran. A family man par excellence, he was truly devoted to his dear family and wife of over 70 years; a man of great humility, kindness, and patience. Also dedicated in memory of Rosalie Zwagil, vwwg, who had a vivacious personality and an energetic personality. She loved to be a part of Jewish culture and Jewish music. More importantly, she had a passion for helping people in need especially sick children. Rosalie was also very involved with her charity organization, Kappa Guild, which aided sick children. Also dedicated in memory of Paul Naden, who was the embodiment of kindness. ▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼▼

The Chesed Fund Limited is dedicated in memory of Mordechai & Rebecca Kapiloff vwwg, Dr. Bernard Kapiloff vwwg and Rabbi Norman & Louise Gerstenfeld vwwg. Project Ezra of Baltimore is dedicated in memory of M. Leo Storch vwwg.

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

1. Submit your nominations to The Chesed Fund by email to or by fax to 410-358-7373.

Community Safety & Service Awards will be presented to the winners at the special award ceremony. You are invited to attend to recognize and honor those who have contributed outstandingly to our community.

The Chesed Fund and Project Ezra are once again asking you to nominate children, youth or adults who have gone above and beyond to help ensure the safety and security of our community.

3209 Fallstaff Road, Rear Building




MAY 11, 2017

Around the Community . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .6 Community Calendar . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

JEWISH THOUGHT Rabbi Zvi Teichman. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38 Rabbi Silber. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40 Rabbi Motty Rabinowitz. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42 Motherless on Mother’s Day. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52 A Shining Jew. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60 Thirty Three – And Still Counting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65

PEOPLE 613 Seconds with Israel (Elgy) Elgamil . . . . . . . . . . 19

HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT Notable Quotes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43 Centerfold. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46

JEWISH LIFE Want a Healthy Meal? Cook at Home. . . . . . . . . . . . 34 Dating Dialogue. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 49 BizWiz. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53 Political Crossfire. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54 Forgotten Heroes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56 Your Money. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58 Mental Health Corner. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 64 Gluten Free Recipe Column. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 68 Cooking for the King. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 69 Why Did the Loophole Cross the Road?. . . . . . . . . 70


Dear Readers,

This past Wednesday, 14 of Iyar, we marked Pesach Sheni or “the second Pesach” which has one of the most inspirational messages of the Jewish calendar. The setting is the dessert, first year after we left Egypt. There was a group of Yidden who were not able to bring the Korban Pesach due to their being impure. They get this idea that they should demand from Moshe Rabeinu, “Why should we lose out”? We also want to bring the Korban! When Moshe asks Hashem, incredible as it sounds, Hashem agrees that they should get another chance. Think about it. The law was clear; one who is impure cannot bring the Korban. It’s not a punishment, it’s a fact. One who is impure cannot bring a Korban. So what gave them the idea that asking, “Why should we lose out?” would change anything? That’s like someone who was forced to eat on Yom Kippur asking to fast on Chanukah! Yet maybe that was exactly it. There was no logic in their question, just a simple longing to connect with their creator through observing his commandment. No plan, no long term goal. Just a simple deep- rooted cry lamenting their loss. And their request was granted and they were indeed able to make up for the lost opportunity. They made the sacrifice a full month after Passover. They could accomplish what they missed the first time. And that’s the message. We all have a list of missed opportunities. Bad decisions. Sometimes our fault, sometimes not. Regardless, we are granted the opportunity to reach within ourselves bringing about the fulfillment of our wish for another chance. Anth

other chance in accomplishing a goal we once had. Another chance in improving a relationship, and another chance to be the people we want to be. There is another opportunity. Take advantage of it. But even more than that, turn the once missed opportunity into a springboard so that we can accomplish much more this time around. An opportune time for this is Lag B’Omer. A unique day with rich spiritual significance. A day of joy and Jewish pride. A day which tells us that deeper than the color of our clothes, the schools we send our children to and the Shuls we frequent, is our being one people with one destiny. Let’s not get distracted by our natural reaction to someone who looks different than us, taking a deeper look and respect the person within. You never know, they might even teach us a thing or two! In our times, we still have these questions, “Why should we miss out? Why should we be unable to serve our creator with a complete heart? Why should we have such a hard time infusing our children with our rich spiritual inheritance? And why should we not be able to connect with our creator through all of the Torah’s commandments?” We hope that we do not receive a partial answer, solving only some of our challenges. We long for nothing less than our peoples return to their homeland. A world in which the hand of our creator is revealed. And in which justice, goodness and kindness prevail. Wishing you a most enjoyable Shabbos and a Lag B’Omer Sameach!


B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Israel News . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22 That’s Odd. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

The Baltimore Jewish Home is an independent bi-weekly newspaper. All opinions expressed by the journalists, contributors and/or advertisers printed and/or quoted herein are solely their opinions and do not reflect the opinions of BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME, their parent company or affiliates, and may have been previously disseminated by them on television, radio, Internet or another medium. The Baltimore Jewish Home is not responsible for typographical errors, or for the kashrus of any product or business advertised within. The BJH contains words of Torah. Please treat accordingly.




MAY 11, 2017

TICKS CAN INFECT HUMANS WITH BACTERIA, VIRUSES AND PARASITES THAT CAN CAUSE SERIOUS ILLNESS SUCH AS LYME DISEASE. PREVENTION TIPS: • Before doing outdoor activities such as gardening, camping, hiking, and playing, consider using repellents with DEET on your clothes and skin. • Modify your landscape to create tick free zones by mowing grass often and regularly removing leaf litter, moist plant litter, brush & weeds. • After coming indoors check your clothes and exposed skin for ticks.


• Not every tick carries Lyme disease, but to avoid the potential for the disease don’t delay and consider sending the tick to a lab immediately. If caught early enough and the tick tests positive as a carrier of Lyme disease, you can prevent being infected with Lyme disease by taking certain medications. • Seek medical attention and speak with your doctor if you develop a rash at the site of the bite between 3 to 30 days after the bite and/or if you develop a fever.

STAIMAN DESIGN- 410-580-0100

For more information visit websites such as: or May 8, 2017

“Prepare for a Bad Summer for Ticks-Mild winters and big deer and mice populations mean more ticks and higher rates of Lyme disease diagnoses.” Wall Street Journal April 24, 2017

Sponsored by: The Chesed Fund Limited is dedicated in memory of Mordechai & Rebecca Kapiloff vwwg Dr. Bernard Kapiloff vwwg and Rabbi Norman & Louise Gerstenfeld vwwg.

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

• If you find a tick on your body remove it immediately by grasping it with tweezers only (do not touch the tick with your bare hands) as close to the skin as possible and pulling it straight out.

“An estimated 300,000 people in the United States are infected with Lyme disease each year. The Center for Disease Control has predicted a surge in the number of Lyme-carrying ticks in the Northeast and Midwest...”


Around the Community


MAY 11, 2017

Apply Now for 2017-2018 BOOST Scholarships By: Rabbi Ariel Sadwin Mid-Atlantic Region Director, Agudath Israel of America Cohn


he application process is now underway for the BOOST (Broadening Options and Opportunities for Students Today) Scholarship Program. Families with a household income that qualifies for the Free and Reduced-Price Meals (FARMs) program should apply for a scholarship for each of their school aged children entering kindergarten in fall 2017 (PLEASE NOTE: kindergarten is the grade before first grade and not nursery) through 12th grade. The program is open to all income eligible students, and not only stu-

dents who received a scholarship in 2016-2017. Those who received a scholarship in 2016-2017 still MUST re-apply in order to get a 2017-2018 scholarship. The online application and all information regarding participation, income verification, and eligibility can be found by clicking here.

The deadline to submit an application is June 15, 2017 at 11:59 pm. Any other questions can be addressed to the Maryland State Department of Education at boost.msde@ or to the Agudath Israel of Maryland office at

A Chai Lifeline fairytale – Our Very Own Beauty By Sigalle Moskowitz

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Chai Lifeline Volunteer


n April 13, a fairytale of our own came true with the help of one our amazing volunteers, Adi Singerman. When Adi met her buddy, Ariella, she immediately knew that she was a princess who deserved the very best. Adi felt that this special princess deserved more than just seeing the movie at home, so she pulled strings to create a magical morning for Ariella. Most people go to the movie theatre to watch a movie with other people. Not everyone gets a private viewing of Beauty and the Beast, but even more special, Ariella got to meet some of

the characters! After participating in the Beauty and the Beast musical at Beth Tfiloh Dahan Community High School, Adi gathered her fellow actors and actresses together to enhance the special day. Gaston (Noah B.), Belle (Ashely C.), Babbete (Rayut B.), the Prince/Beast (Eitan M.) and Lumier (Evyatar S.) all dressed up in

their costumes and met Ariella at the movie theatre. She couldn’t believe her eyes and a smile stretched across her face. She was so excited and happy that this fairytale could come to life! Chai Lifeline is so excited to welcome another princess into our family. Welcome, Ariella!



B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Get the 2017 Honda Odyssey while they’re still available!


Around the Community

Baltimore Community Treated To Insider’s View of the Baltimore City Crime Lab


MAY 11, 2017 Cohn


n the evening of May 1, 2017 over 75 community members gathered at the Cross Country School to hear from members of the Baltimore City Crime Lab. Chief Steve O’Dell, who leads the Forensic Sciences and Evidence Management Division of the Baltimore City Police department described in detail the various roles the crime lab plays in the City’s fight against crime. The Chief thanked Baltimore city Councilman YItzy Schleifer for the opportunity to address our community and noted that it was at the Councilman’s urging that his division was able to bring on 10 new latent print technicians to address burglaries. The Crime Lab with its nine distinct labs takes up 7 floors of the Police Headquarters building and is tasked with everything from latent prints, controlled substance testing, and ballistics

to DNA testing. The presentation truly engaged the audience who asked multiple questions of the guest speakers and even stayed after the program was completed to continue to inquire about various specific areas of forensic science. At the behest of Councilman Isaac “Yitzy” Schleifer, this was the first time the Crime Lab has conducted a community engagement program. Councilman Schleifer, commented, “It is critical for the general public to understand how dedicated and professional the Baltimore City Crime Lab is. By understanding how crimes are investigated, empowers the community to be better prepared to deter crime as well as deal with the aftermath of a crime should they find themselves in the unfortunate position of being a victim.


B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M



As a strong proponent of public safety, I could not be more impressed with

Chief O’Dell and his entire team.” Nathan Willner, President of the Cheswolde Neighborhood Association, assisted in facilitating the program and reflected, “The men and women of the crime lab are truly unsung heroes of law enforcement. It is one of the most cost effective tools we have in resolving crimes. Chief O’Dell sees his role as a partner with the community in supporting the work of law enforcement as it investigates and prosecutes criminals. From the enthusiasm of the attendees it was clear that it was a program the community really found informative. Councilman Schleifer continues to demonstrate his commitment to bring public safety programs and resources to the community, he is doing a terrific job representing our District”.

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4Midrash Rabbah (Kleinman Edition) 4Megillos (Tanach Series) by Rabbi Meir Zlotowitz 4Later Prophets (Milstein Edition) 4Mishnah Elucidated (Schottenstein Edition) 4Mishnah Yad Avraham 4Mishnah — Hebrew Edition (Ryzman Edition) 4Studies in the Weekly Parshah by Rabbi Yehuda Nachshoni 4Pirkei Avos Treasury by Rabbi Moshe Lieber 4Ramban on Chumash 4Rashi on Chumash (Sapirstein Edition) 4Rav Lau on Avos

4Early Prophets (Rubin Edition) 4Sand and Stars by Yafffa Ganz 4Schottenstein Edition Talmud Sets 4Sfas Emes by Rabbi Yosef Stern 4Stone Edition Chumash 4Stories My Grandfather Told Me by Zev Greenwald 4Story a Day by G. Sofer 4Tales of Tzaddikim by G. Matov 4Tanach (Stone Edition) 4Tehillim (Tanach Series) by Rabbi A. C. Feuer 4Treasury of Chasidic Tales by Rabbi S. Y. Zevin 4Weekly Midrash

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4Family Zemiros Sets — Interlinear and Leatherette 4Festivals in Halachah by Rabbi S. Y. Zevin 4Insights in the Torah by Rabbi Zalman Sorotzkin 4Interlinear Chumash (Schottenstein Edition) 4Interlinear Siddur and Tehillim (Schottenstein Edition) 4Jewish History — A Trilogy by Rabbi Berel Wein 4Kosher by Design Cookbook Series by Susie Fishbein 4Kitzur Shulchan Aruch (Kleinman Edition) 4Laws of Shabbos by Rabbi S.B. Cohen 4Lesson a Day by Rabbi Shimon Finkelman 4Machzor — Classic and Interlinear

MAY 11, 2017

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Around the Community

Jonathan Ringo, M.D., Named President/COO of Sinai Hospital of Baltimore


MAY 11, 2017

By: Lifebridge Health Cohn


ifeBridge Health has named Jonathan Ringo, M.D., as president and chief operating officer (COO) of Sinai Hospital of Baltimore. Dr. Ringo has served as Sinai’s interim COO for four months. “Dr. Ringo’s clinical expertise and thoughtful approach to patient care, combined with his experience in hospital operations, information technology and population health, make him the ideal person to lead LifeBridge Health’s flagship hospital. Dr. Ringo has proven himself to be an excellent leader of Sinai’s medical staff and employees, and he has a genuine passion for LifeBridge Health’s mission to improve the health of people in the communities we serve,” says Neil Meltzer, president and CEO of LifeBridge Health. “With its strong Jewish heritage and values, Sinai Hospital has a 150-

year history of service to the community, and I am honored to be chosen to continue that tradition and to lead an amazing team of medical professionals who are dedicated to providing the highest-quality, compassionate care to our patients,” says Jonathan Ringo, M.D., president and COO of Sinai Hospital. “I will use my strongly held beliefs as a member of the orthodox Jewish community to help those in need regardless of age, race, religion, gender and ethnicity.” Dr. Ringo joined LifeBridge Health in 2014 as the system’s first chief medical information officer and then became the system’s vice president of clinical transformation to oversee system-wide case management, population health, medical informatics and ambulatory quality. Along with his hospital operations duties, Dr. Ringo has continued to practice as an OB/GYN, including shifts on Sinai Hospital’s Labor and Delivery unit as well as working at the OB/GYN practice of Sinai Commu-

nity Care, and will continue to do so. “As a doctor, I have the privilege to see first-hand the wonderful care our physicians, nurses and other employees provide to our patients and their families. Sinai Hospital truly offers the best of both worlds in medicine: the cutting-edge therapies and research that you find at an academic medical center, combined with the warm and sup-

portive environment of a community hospital,” adds Dr. Ringo. Before joining LifeBridge Health, Dr. Ringo served as the director of population health information at Northwell Health System (formerly NorthShore LIJ Health System) in New York, and as senior scientist and global strategy manager for GlaxoSmithKline. Dr. Ringo is board-certified in obstetrics and gynecology. He earned his medical degree from the InterNational University of Health Sciences and served as the administrative chief resident of Sinai Hospital during his training. Along with his Sinai experience as a medical student and resident, Dr. Ringo also has deep personal connections with Sinai as many family members were born at the hospital, including five of his six children, his wife and his mother-in-law. Dr. Ringo is a two-time winner of the Excellence in Teaching Award from the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine.

Monday, May 15! America Eats for Israel - All You Have to Do Is EAT! By: BJLife Newsroom

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M Cohn


his Monday, May 15, 2017, communities across the United States will join together in dining at participating Kosher restaurants to feed hungry Israelis. 10% of proceeds will go toward funding Meir Panim’s Restaurant-Style Soup Kitchens in Israel. 1.7 million Israelis live in poverty – and 800,000 of them are vulnerable children. For more than a decade, America Eats for Israel has been a groundbreaking show of solidarity with the needy of Israel. Originally a Baltimore-based initiative led by students of Yeshivat Rambam and then Beth Tfiloh Dahan Community School, AEFI is now a national event. “This is a fun way to raise awareness in the U.S. that Israel has an epidemic of disadvantaged people who need our help,” said Danielle Rubin, Project Director for American Friends of Meir Panim.

“We are hoping that this project raises significant funds to help impoverished Israelis.” Meir Panim’s projects include free restaurants, meals-on-wheels for the homebound, prepaid food shopping cards, school lunch programs, and after-school youth clubs. Jewish students in multiple U.S. cities have recruited participating restaurants, are working hard to publicize the event, and are excitedly planning to “eat out for Israel” on May 15. Participating schools and groups include Atlantic Seaboard NCSY, Beth El Hebrew School, Beth Tfiloh Dahan Community School, Krieger Schechter Day School, Ner Tamid Youth and Scouts, and Ohr Chadash Academy in Baltimore; Bruriah High School for Girls, Ma’ayanot Yeshiva High School for Girls, and Torah Academy of Bergen County in New Jersey; Hebrew Academy of the Five Towns and Rockaway, North Shore Hebrew Academy High School, and Stella K. Abraham High School for Girls in

Long Island; and Yeshiva University High School for Boys (MTA) in New York City. “Since America Eats for Israel began…, my family has enthusiastically eaten pizza, shawarma, hamburgers, donuts, Chinese food and more happily knowing that 10 percent of what we paid goes towards supporting our people in Israel,” explained Rabbi Sam Wach, Youth Director for the Ner Tamid Youth and Scouts. “As the day approaches, we can feel the excitement from participating students and community members... I can still picture in my mind the students standing on the road waving at cars to beckon them to share in this worthy mission. It is with great pride that Congrega-

tion Ner Tamid Youth and Scouts will be, once again, taking a lead in this project.” Elie Hirt, Assistant Director of Student Activities and Recruitment at Yeshiva University High School for Boys (MTA) in New York City, said that students are excitedly recruiting neighborhood restaurants for the event. “Americans are often unaware that many Israelis do not know where their next meal is coming from - many people, especially the elderly, must choose between buying medicine or food,” explained Rubin. “America Eats for Israel is a wonderful way to show solidarity with the needy of Israel, simply by eating out at your favorite restaurant.” For more information on America Eats for Israel, please visit www. To donate to American Friends of Meir Panim, please visit or call 877-736-6283. Please mail checks to 5316 New Utrecht Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11219


B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Ruby Lasker Designs



Around the Community


MAY 11, 2017

Obamacare Repeal: How Maryland Representatives Voted

By: Staff Reporter Cohn


ere’s a list of how Maryland’s members of Congress voted when the House successfully voted to repeal Obamacare Thursday. The House of Representatives, by the slimmest of margins, passed a health care bill Thursday May 4th that would repeal and replace major parts of the Affordable Care Act. All Maryland representatives opposed it, except for one Republican. (see list below). The final tally was 217-213, but Maryland representatives voted 7-1 against, according to the House website.

Maryland U.S. Rep. Dutch Ruppersberger, D-District 2, said in a statement he believes “this version is even worse than the last one.” Ruppersberger voted against the measure because he thinks the AHCA will cost more and cover less and it allows insurance companies to charge Americans with pre-existing conditions higher premiums. “The whole point of healthcare reform was to curtail the unsustainable premium increases American families are struggling with. You do that by getting more people covered. This bill does neither,” Ruppersberger said. “I get my health insurance from Obamacare, and, while it is not perfect, I believe Congress should be focused on making improvements to

increase competition and drive down costs.” Maryland U.S. Rep. Andy Harris, R-District 1, voted for the measure. He released a statement saying “there has been significant misinformation” about the AHCA bill. “I want to be clear that the AHCA explicitly maintains, and even adds, protections for pre-existing conditions. The bill makes clear that under no circumstance can people be denied

coverage because of a pre-existing condition,” Harris said. Harris also said he believes Obamacare resulted in “skyrocketing health insurance prices, a diminishing choice of providers, and in some areas a dwindling to no choice of health insurance plans. Here is the final vote tally to repeal Obamacare: Yes Andy Harris (R) No Dutch Ruppersberger (D) John Sarbanes (D) Anthony Brown (D) Steny Hoyer (D) John Delaney (D) Elijah Cummings (D) Jamie Raskin (D)

Northrop Grumman Engineering Presentation at YKY/TI


B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

ngineers from Northrop Grumman, a leading global aerospace and defense technology company , delivered a fascinating presentation to the 7th grade classes at Yeshivas Kochav Yitzchok/

Torah Institute on Tuesday, May 2. Mr. Bill Saks and Dr. Adean Zapinsky expertly presented various forms of engineering and its practical applications. Students were mesmerized as they learned about bridge structures, electricity, 3D printing and more. They

also learned the importance and precision that goes into the engineering process of various projects. After the formal presentation, each class was challenged to create a bridge using only 3 sheets of paper and a few inches of painter’s tape. The paper bridge needed to be strong enough to support a roll of pennies and large enough for a 2-liter bottle to pass underneath - which is much easier said than done! The exercise not only gave the students an appreciation for engineering, but also impressed upon them the how using minimal resources can create something fully functional. The presentation and hands-on building was a great opportunity for the 7th graders to learn about real life engineering from two very skilled professionals. YKY/TI is happy to have such opportunities which enrich and deepen a student’s education and we thank Mr. Saks and Dr. Zapinsky

for taking their time to so eloquently share with our students their expertise in a most interesting manner.



Bikur Cholim of Baltimore presents

MAY 11, 2017

an nu al wo m e n’s b r u n c h

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Join in a special commemorative journal to honor the memory of these two pillars of Bikur Cholim. Submission Deadline May 11th.

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B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Past Bikur Cholim Vice President


MAY 11, 2017




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Israel (Elgy) Elgamil Network which take care of members of our community at times of illness and crisis. We also have Ahavas Yisroel that feeds families and helps those in need in many many ways.

What do you love most about Baltimore? I love the cohesiveness of the community, especially how everyone supports one another. Baltimore is a warm and welcoming place, where people care for each other. We have the Associated that contributes to all of our schools. We have organizations like Hatzalah, Shomrim and Chaverim that are all staffed by volunteers. We have Bikur Cholim and Jewish Caring

Why did you decide to start a roofing company? I didn’t know a thing about Roofing when I started. I didn’t wake up one day and say “hey mom, I want to be a roofer!” as this definitely was not one of my aspirations. I do enjoyed helping people fix things. Everybody worries about job security and providing for their family’s future. This was a worry of mine early on, since there was not much stability in my life back then and didn’t know

others and being supportive of young Entrepreneurs in our community. As the next generation is entering the workforce, it is important to encourage them to be realistic about the time, customer service and the effort it takes to grow into a successful company.

Can you tell us why you started the roofing company? Since I was venturing to open my own business, I kept coming up with great ideas on what to open and where to start. All my friends and some family members would put down my ideas or say that It would fail. Months later, other people started those businesses and became successful. I was like, “if they can do it then so can I.” When I came up with this roofing idea, I got the approval from my wife and some close friends, though there were still many naysayers.

What was your biggest mistake in business? My biggest mistake was that I listened to so many naysayers who discouraged me. They just continue to linger and never go away!  I’m happy I chose to move forward and pursue roofing.  My advice would be, you can’t succeed if you don’t try. Do You have any words of Torah you live by? I keep Pirkei Avos close. My favorite pasuk there has always been: “havei mekabel  es Kol Adom bisaver panim yofos” to greet everyone with a cheery friendly face.

What motivates you to help young entrepreneurs? How can you be reached? When I look back at when our I can be reached at Park Heights company started, it was very difficult. We had no foundation or support sys- Roofing 410-358-1257 tem which is beneficial to succeed. I was lacking guidance. As a result, I realized the importance of helping

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Didn’t your company recently receive an award from Baltimore magazine? Yes, we were recognized by the How long have you lived in BalMount Washington community that timore? coined us “a hidden gem.” We were Practically my whole life. My parthen nominated, along with two other ents moved here from Brooklyn, New larger roofing companies, to receive York when I was a newborn. They this Baltimore Magazine award and moved because of the cost of living. we ended up on top. During the first Living expenses in New York were few years of our company I never too high and they were looking for a imagined we could ever receive an better environment and greater opporaward like this. tunities.

what direction I was headed. I was in college for business and finance and decided I needed to start something that I could grow, a business that would be demand driven. When I had trouble finding a roofer to come out and diagnose a leak in my own roof, I realized there was a need for roofers.



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The Week In News evangelical Christians and believed that non-Jewish support for Israel was important for Israel’s survival. He was principled, a man of faith, and a man of action. His father, Menachem Elon, was the Deputy Chief Justice of Israel. Rabbi Benny Elon, ob”m, is survived by his wife, journalist Emuna Elon, and their six children.

Former Tourism Minister Dies at 62 Rabbi Benny Elon, former Tourism Minister of Israel and lover of Israel, died last week at the age of 62. Elon died of throat cancer, which he was diagnosed with in 2006. Rabbi Elon served in the Knesset between 1996 and 2009. He was the tourism minister for two postings under Ariel Sharon before he was fired by Sharon for his opposition to the Gaza withdrawal plan. Rabbi Elon stopped serving the public in 2009 when he was placed on the Jewish Home party’s Knesset slate.

President Reuven Rivlin remembered Rabbi Elon as “a big-hearted man, who dedicated himself entirely to the cause of education, and the public.” “As a minister, as a member of parliament, and as a man of action, vision, and of spirit, Rabbi Benny Elon was one of the great fighters and doers for the sake of the Land of Israel, for its residents, and its children,” Rivlin said. Rabbi Elon traveled the world with his infectious love of Israel. He helped to promote a coalition with

Fidget Fad Created After Trip to Israel

You can hardly go anywhere these days without seeing a fidget spinner, the newest high-speed spinning fad

that has kids across the globe very excited. It turns out that the inventor of the mesmerizing toy thought of the idea over 20 years ago while visiting Israel. Catherine Hettinger, of Orlando, Florida, has said that she was looking for a way to distract and soothe children. She sought to do so after overhearing a conversation about Palestinian children throwing rocks at Israeli police during demonstrations. The device was meant to give children a distraction. “It started as a way of promoting peace, and then I went on to find something that was very calming,” Hettinger said this week. The spinners have three prongs with a center bearing that allows it to rotate at very high speeds. Her first patent for the toy was approved in 1997. It then ran out in 2005 and independent manufacturers mass produced and marketed the toy. On May 2, the spinners made it to Amazon’s top 20 bestsellers in the toys and games category. Hettinger did not renew the pat-

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The Week In News ent when it expired because she could not afford the $400 fee. “I just didn’t have the money,” she explained. “It’s challenging, being an inventor,” she said. “Only about 3% of inventions make any money. I’ve watched other inventors mortgage their houses and lose a lot. You take roommates, you get help from friends and family. It is hard.” The toys are so popular that more and more schools across the globe are banning them because they are distracting.

Turkish Prez Calls for Al-Aqsa Gathering

This week, the president of Turkey, Recep Tayyip Erdogan, called on Muslims to go to the Al-Aqsa Mosque in the hundreds of thousands in support of the Palestinians and to protect the site’s “Muslim character.” His comments were made at the opening of the Istanbul-based AlQuds Waqf International Forum. “Turkey attaches great importance to the justified resistance of the Palestinians and will not yield to Israeli attempts to change the status quo in the Al-Aqsa Mosque,” Erdogan proclaimed. “We as Muslims should visit the Al-Aqsa Mosque more often, every day that Jerusalem is under occupation is an insult to us.” He continued, “They [Israel] feel they are immune from punishment for their crimes, but the international community must stand up to them. Peace cannot be established in the region if international law is indifferent to massacres and cruelty.” Erdogan closed by saying that only a Palestinian state with East Jerusalem as its capital will bring peace

to the region. He also praised a document that Hamas published last week as “an important step” on the road to a calm Middle East. Israel’s Foreign Ministry responded to the comments by pointing out that “he who systematically violates human rights in his country will not preach morality to the only true democracy in the region. Israel adheres strictly to full freedom of worship for Jews, Muslims, and Christians – and will continue to do so in spite of baseless slander.” Later on Monday, Erdogan discussed ways to halt the so-called “Judaization” of Jerusalem with Palestinian Authority Prime Minister Rami Hamdallah. At a meeting in Istanbul the Turkish leader “confirmed the necessity of unifying efforts to protect Jerusalem against attempts of Judaization,” according to the Palestinian Ma’an news agency. In response, President Reuven Rivlin pointed out that Jerusalem has had a Jewish majority for over 150 years – including under Ottoman rule. “We have heard voices which attack Israel for building Jewish life in Jerusalem,” the president said in response on Tuesday. “I must tell these people, for the last 150 years there has been a Jewish majority in Jerusalem. Even under the Ottoman Empire there was a Jewish majority in Jerusalem.” Rivlin’s family has lived in Jerusalem since 1809. Modern Turkey is the successor of the Ottoman Empire, which ruled the Holy Land from the late 15th century until 1917.

New Bill to Establish Israel as “Jewish State”





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The Week In News Israel will become known as “the national home of the Jewish people” if the Knesset passes a controversial law that has been proposed. The Ministerial Committee for Legislation has unanimously voted to throw their support behind Likud MK Avi Dichter’s Jewish State bill, which seeks to enshrine in Israeli law the status of the Jewish people in relation to the State of Israel. If the law passes it will become one of the Basic Laws which guide

Israel’s legal system and are more difficult to repeal than other laws. ​“This is a small step for the Jewish State bill, which establishes that Israel is and will be a Jewish and democratic state, and it’s a big step toward defining our identity, not only in the eyes of the world but primarily for ourselves, Israelis. To be a free people in our land,” Dichter proclaimed. According to Dichter, the law is especially important as it will assist in countering Palestinian efforts to deny

the Jewish people’s rights to Israel. “Events of recent months prove that this is a battle for the Israel’s image and national identity. The Palestinians no longer hide their goal of erasing the Jewish people’s nation-state,” he wrote. The bill was first proposed by Dichter in 2014. It was put on the backburner, however, after it received harsh criticism from both Arab opposition and liberal-minded members of Dichter’s own Likud party. Many oth-

er drafts of the bill have been brought forward since then, however none have been successful in gaining any traction in the Knesset. The latest version of the bill was able to get off of the ground because it made the necessary compromises, both in wording and in policy, to get the support it needs from a wider range of Knesset members.

Palestinian Terrorist in Hotel Stabbings Indicted

On April 23 a Palestinian teenager stormed into a Tel Aviv hotel and began stabbing hotel employees. He injured four people before being apprehended by authorities. Last week, the terrorist, Imad Agbar, 18, from Nablus, was indicted by the Tel Aviv District Attorney on four counts of attempted murder and a terrorist act. According to the indictment, Agbar confessed to the attack, openly admitting that he sought to “kill Jews because they are Jews.” The indictment stated that Agbar entered the city with the NGO Natural Peace Tours. He had received a one-day pass to enter Israel, provided by the Defense Ministry’s Coordinator of Government Activities in the Territories. Allegedly he sharpened his belt buckle, which he later used as his weapon, allowing him to pass the security checkpoint to enter Israel from the West Bank undetected. Agbar left the tour group at Hayarakon Park in northern Tel Aviv and slipped away to carry out the attack. The terrorist’s first victim was a 70-year-old walking down the street. He then entered the Leonardo Beach Hotel where he used wire cutters to stab a clerk near the neck in the lobby’s antique shop. The clerk’s husband reacted quickly and began chasing Agbar back out into the lobby. As the terrorist



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attacked another employee in the lobby, the husband blocked the revolving door in an attempt to trap the suspect. Witnesses say Agbar charged at him and shattered the glass door in order to escape outdoors where he was met by police officers. According to the indictment, several months before the attack Agbar had plans to carry out a stabbing attack at the Dead Sea, in December 2016. After a taxi driver told him that the beach wasn’t crowded at that time of the year he decided not to carry out the plan.

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Oreo has done it again. This time, they’ve come out with a new flavor – which hit stores on May 8 – the Fireworks Oreo. At the center of the cookie crème blue and red “popping candies” are swirled, which taste like “fireworks” when they explode in your mouth. Want to make a statement on July 4? Buy some now – they’re a limited-edition – and, yes, they’re kosher. In the past Oreo has come out with other exciting flavors. Remember Mocha, Peeps, Swedish Fish, Brownie Batter, S’mores and Filled Cupcake – to name a few? But the cookie company keeps on going and they’re looking for more exciting flavors. The person who comes up with the next winning flavor will win a $500,000 prize and a trip to NYC for “unprecedented VIP access” to check out “never-before-released Oreo creations” in the “Wonder Vault.” Runners-up will see $25,000 in prize money. Winners are decided on “fan voting.” I’m thinking that a cholent-kishke flavor will definitely win over fans.

Einstein Bagels recently announced its newest product: the Espresso Buzz Bagel. Also called Boosted Bagels, these round, chewy breakfast staples are infused with 32MGs of caffeine, equivalent to one third of a cup of coffee. According to the seller, they “are incredibly delicious and soar above the average breakfast.” For the coffee junkies among us, you may need more than a bagel to help jumpstart your day. But hey, have you ever tried lox in your coffee before?

Play-Doh, Donkeys and Glitter Sometimes we wonder when teens will grow up if they are still enjoying playtime in college. Today, college students are given so many ways to cope with the stress of final exams it’s amazing that their mothers aren’t still making their sandwich lunches for them – or are they? Take the University of Pennsylvania. In its hallowed halls several different student groups are offered various study breaks, including a Zumba class, a video game stress reliever, and a “Chocolate and Chocolate Labs” event, according to the Daily Pennsylvanian. At Penn State, students enjoy a “De-Stress Fest,” which includes origami folding, Wii gaming, “brain massage music,” among other ac-

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The Week In News tivities. The University of Michigan offers Play-Doh and more as a way to chill before finals. Want to know what else is offered? If you guessed glitter bottles, Legos and dominoes, you’d be correct. An annual tradition at the University of Illinois offers students a “Reading Day.” “In place of classes, the university hosts a variety of non-mandatory events aimed at helping students study and de-stress,” the Daily Illini says. At Temple University, its Student Activities group put together an all-inclusive “camping” event called Camp TU. Students had the chance to participate in de-stressing activities by zip-lining, scaling a rock wall, watching the movie “Anchorman,” or eating from one of seven food trucks, says The Tab. According to the director of student activities, Christopher Carey, around 2,000 students showed. “I can say with certainty that students had a lot of fun. If having fun helped them relieve some stress or unwind a bit, that is great, too,” he said.

Hope College and St. Cloud University also took the animal route, although St. Cloud offered dog destress therapy for staff and faculty as well as for students. Now we wonder why millennials have no interest in finding jobs.

If students are afraid of heights and are pulling their hair out over exams, they can head over to Montana State University, where students scuttled over to the library to play with furry friends – including a group of dogs and a 900-pound donkey named Oliver. Furry friends may be better than a fidget spinner. According to the Chronicle, “Students were encouraged to place a marker on a large board to show their level of stress, ranked 1 to 5, before petting the animals. On their way in, students tended to rank themselves a 4 or 5. On the way out, students seemed more at ease, giving themselves a 1 or 2.”

Flying High

It’s been 22 years and 1 million passengers. That’s what Captain John Richie was celebrating when he brought a bottle of champagne onboard his Southwest flight from Den-

ver to Pittsburgh this week. “Twenty two years ago I retired from the United States Air Force,” said Captain Richie over the loudspeaker to his passengers before the flight. “I had the privilege of flying F-16s, both as a combat pilot and as a test pilot. For the past 22 years I’ve been flying for Southwest.” This week, though, was special. Throughout his many years as a pilot on Southwest, Richie counted each passenger on his plane. This week, Richie flew his millionth passenger. In celebration, Richie – wearing a tie with blue and white stars – walked down the aisle to her seat and presented her with a bottle of champagne and an envelope filled with cash containing the exact amount of money she paid for the ticket. The plane full of passengers applauded Richie’s celebration – and perhaps each of them was hoping the woman would share her champagne. We doubt she did.


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Health & F tness

Want a Healthy Meal? Cook at Home By Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN


ow many times a week do you order fast food? Family night at a restaurant on Sunday night, pizza on Thursday night; let’s not forget about ordering in lunch at least once or twice a week. The U.S. is the birthplace of fast food. Studies show that Americans eat fewer than 70 percent of their meals at home. This, together with the growing obesity epidemic, calls for a change in our eating habits. A return to home cooked meals may offer significant health benefits. Our food choices and diet determine whether or not we are getting adequate amounts of the nutrients our bodies need to function properly. According to a study performed in Seattle, eating home cooked meals may lead to better health outcomes than eating out frequently. Hopefully the following information will motivate you to make time for nutritious home cooked meals. What is so bad about eating out? The problem with constantly eating at restaurants is that commercially prepared foods are notoriously high in fat, calories, salt and sugar. Such foods are fine on occasion, but not part of a regular diet. It is no surprise that cooking at home is healthier than eating out. According to the author of the study Adam Drewnowski, “Frequent eating out was associated with lower diet quality, more ‘empty calories’ and higher diet costs.” By cooking at home you have complete control over what you add into your food and the method of cooking.

You can substitute ingredients for healthier choices, bake instead of fry, and cut down on certain ingredients. For example, in most recipes you can cut back on the oil, salt, and sugar, leaving you with a healthier dish that is just as tasty. So preparing your food at home gives you control over what goes on your plate and into your mouth. Restaurants also tend to serve extra-large portions. And let’s be honest, if the food is in front of you,

and/or sugar will eventually free you from cravings. All in all, eating more meals at home improves overall health. The study demonstrated that those who ate more frequently at home scored higher on the healthy eating index than the others. And what’s more is that eating at home actually saves you money. Those who ate more frequently at home also spent less money on food overall than those who ate out more often. What can be better

What can be better than eating healthy while saving money?!

and you paid for it, you’re eating it. Home cooked meals allow you to ration your food as desired, and even if the portion is bigger than recommended, it is most probably lower in fat and calories than a normal sized portion at a restaurant. Furthermore, studies found that home cooked meals tend to contain more fruits and vegetables and less fried food, soda and transfat. Additionally, cooking at home improves your creative cooking skills. You can experiment with flavors and healthy ingredients while learning new cooking techniques. Preparing your food at home also allows you train your palate. Slowly cutting back on salt

than eating healthy while saving money?! The problem is, cooking at home is not cut out for everyone. Some lack basic cooking skills, while others are short on time. But cooking at home does not have to be time-consuming or anything fancy. Simple dishes that make a healthy, balanced meal meeting the dietary guidelines are ideal. If you are crunched for time when it comes to preparing a healthy home cooked meal, slow cookers can be your best friend. Simply throw in some ingredients before work and by time you come home you will have a delicious hot meal all ready to go. Another option is cooking in

advance, dividing the meals into portions and freezing them for a later date. If you don’t mind leftovers, cook in bulk at the beginning of the week, and eat it all throughout the week. Look for simple, quick recipes that don’t require too much prep time. For those of you who don’t consider yourselves cut out for the kitchen, invest in a few cookbooks that have simple, basic recipes. “Every meal does not have to be a masterpiece,” states Lona Sandon, a Dallas nutritionist. “Start simple with something like mac and cheese. Add a side of steamed broccoli and carrots with grilled chicken breast or salmon, and you have a balanced meal.” Start with the basics, and work your way up. Within a few weeks, you’ll get the hang of it and feel like a gourmet chef. Cooking at home is the first step towards a healthier lifestyle. More meals cooked and eaten at home is healthier, cheaper, and may help combat the obesity epidemic. Next time you’re heading towards that fast food store, turn around and head home. Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN, is a Master’s level Registered Dietitian and Certified Dietitian-Nutritionist. She graduated CUNY Brooklyn College receiving a Bachelor’s in Science and Master’s degree in Nutrition and Food Sciences. She is currently a dietitian at Boro Park Center and a private nutrition consultant. She can be reached at






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Iyar 11

Sunday Iyar 12

Iyar 19

Sivan 5

Iyar 26

CJE Annual Meeting


Sivan 12




JCC 7:00 PM




2017 May

City Hall 5:00 PM











Friday Iyar 16

7:53 PM

Iyar 23

7:59 PM

Sivan 1

Sivan 16

8:10 PM

Sivan 9

8:05 PM

Rosh Chodesh









9:15 PM

Sivan 17

9:11 PM

Sivan 10

9:06 PM

Sivan 3

9:00 PM

Iyar 24

8:54 PM

Iyar 17


Community Calendar


Sivan 15

9:10 PM

Sivan 8

Next BJH Issue

Iyar 29

Iyar 22

Iyar 15


Iyar/Sivan 5777

Iyar 14

Iyar 21

Sivan 14

9:09 PM


Sivan 7

Owings Mills JCC 7:00 PM

Baltimore Jewish Hall of Fame

Yom Yerushalayim

Iyar 28

Baltimore City Tax Payer Night





Sivan 13

8:08 PM

Sivan 6

Iyar 27

Iyar 20

Iyar 13

Tuesday 9





8:15 PM



14 Iyar 18 Lag Ba’Omer

Lag Ba’Omer BBQ

Iyar 25

Rabbi Kaplans Shul 5-9 PM see Back Cover

21 Bikur Cholim; Annual Womens Brunch

Sivan 4

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion 10:30 AM see page 15


Cheder Chabad Annual Banquet

Sivan 11

Cheder Chabad of Baltimore 6:00 PM see page 21

MAY 11, 2017


JCN Women’s 5K The Maryland Zoo 8:15 AM see page 30

Community Saftey & Service Award

to have your future event listed in the Community Calendar please contact

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MAY 11, 2017



B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M


MAY 11, 2017

Torah Thought

How Do You Measure Up By Rabbi Zvi Teichman

For the past thirty three days we have been ‘counting the Omer’. We recite the blessing prior to actually counting and mention how G-d sanctified us with His mitzvos and commanded us ‫על ספירת העומר‬, regarding the counting of the Omer. Have you ever stopped to think what we are saying? Do we really count ‘the Omer’? The Omer was the first meal-offering of barley to be offered from the new grain crops which was brought on the second day of Pesach. The Torah then instructs us to start counting forty nine days from the bringing of the Omer culminating with the fiftieth day being designated as the holiday of Shavuot. So then we aren’t really counting the Omer but rather calculating the number of days ‘from’ the Omer. So why do we call this mitzvah the ‘counting of the Omer’ and not more appropriately the ‘counting from the Omer’? Another point to ponder is why do we refer to this meal-offering as ‘the Omer’? The word ‫עומר‬, Omer, is merely a halachic measurement. The Omer is more precisely one tenth of a ‫איפה‬, an Ephah measure. Is it merely noteworthy because of its measurement? There are many other meal-offerings with the same measurement as well, why then is this one associated with its specific measure more than any of the others? • Rav Yaakov Zvi Mecklenberg in his masterpiece, HaK’sav V’haKabbala, points out that the word ‫עומר‬, more specifically means ‘to utilize’ as in the verse that stipulates that a kidnapper is not punishable by death unless ‫והתעמר‬ )‫בו (דברים כד ז‬, he ‘uses’ his victim as well. The implication of this word is the utilizing of something in a dedicated purposeful service.

The Torah therefore refers to the ‫עומר‬, Omer, in the context of the command to count the days from its offering, not as a reference to this measure of barley, but more significantly to the purposeful use of each day in dedicated service to G-d as we progress in our preparing ourselves adequately so we may be worthy of receiving the Torah on the fiftieth day. We express in our blessing the assertion that we are indeed counting, not simply days from the Omer, but indeed ‘the Omer’, the daily ascension of renewed devotion evident in our intensified service to G-d. We must make good ‘use’ of each day and not merely count and watch the days as they disappear. The term ‫עומר‬, also means a tied bundle of grain stalks as in ‫ושכחת עמר‬ )‫(שם כד כ‬, the law regarding a forgotten ‘bundle’ that must be left in the field. This emphasizes the accrued efforts that are ‘bundled’ and ‘bound’, with this notion of binding accenting our willingness to ‘restrict’ our inclinations in designating our energies solely in servitude to G-d. • The Holy Alshich directs us to a fascinating Midrash. When Iyov found himself frustrated and perplexed with his painful situation he sought a debate with G-d as to why he deserves to suffer. G-d responds rhetorically ‫איפה היית ביסדי‬ )‫ארץ (איוב לח ד‬, “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?” G-d continues, ‫האיפה שלך היכן היתה‬, “the Ephah of yours, where was it? Were you part of Adam’s head, forehead, or other limb? When you can figure that out, then we can debate!” The Alshich explains this to mean that each one of us has a unique destiny to fulfill and no human can fathom

his role without knowing which piece of the puzzle he comes from. Man is called a ‫איפה‬, which literally means ‫אי פה‬, where are you from, since each one of us must live our lives with a consciousness of where we stem from and to where we are heading. The word for character is ‫אופי‬, since the quality of who we are is based on the level that we live with this sense of mission. An Ephah is a basic measurement. Similarly man is referred to as an Ephah for it represents his need to ‘measure’ up to his specific task and role as part of the composite of the ‘greater Adam’. The Omer that was brought was what remained after first starting with an Ephah of barley flour and resifting it thirteen times until there remained a pure tenth of its original volume, thus an Omer. Man consists of two hundred and forty eight limbs. One tenth of that would be nearly twenty five, less a fraction (24.8). There are twenty five limbs that we devote actively in serving G-d. Our brain, two ears, two eyes, tongue, lips, heart, two ‘counseling’ kidneys, the ‘angry’ liver, ‘laughing’ spleen, two feet, ten fingers and the male member that is fractioned by the removal of the foreskin, bringing us a total of twenty five less a segment! This, the Holy Alshich exclaims, is man as counterpart to the Omer, each representing the refining process of devoting ourselves totally and purely before G-d! • The days of the Omer then are precisely that; days where we continuously ‘sift’ and refine ourselves, ‘utilizing’ our talents and strengths in devoted service to G-d. We accumulate these days by ‘binding’ our inclina-

tions not allowing them to deter us in this marvelous process of refinement. We are indeed not simply counting from the ‘Omer’, but the Omer itself, days of intensified servitude to G-d. When we make a Siyum on concluding a significant portion of learning, marking an accomplishment of dedicated effort and time, we recite the poignant prayer of Rebbi Nechunya ben HaKaneh. We extol the privilege of being among those who are ‫משכימים לדברי‬ ‫תורה‬, awaken each day invigorated to learn Torah, ‫עמלים ומקבלים שכר‬, arduously toiling in mitzvos and receiving reward and finally ‫רצים לחיי העולם הבא‬, running towards eternal life. The word ‫ עמר‬is an appropriate acronym for these three goals, ‫מלים‬-‫ע‬ ‫צים‬-‫שכימים ר‬-‫! מ‬ ):‫(יעוין בן יהוידע ברכןת כח‬ The Midrash quotes Rebbi Shimon Bar Yochai who points out that among the sacrifices that were brought by Avraham Avinu at the Covenant of the Parts, the ‫עשירית האיפה‬, the tenth of an Ephah was the only one omitted. ‫(ב"ר‬ )‫מד יד‬ Perhaps he sought to teach us that there is one sacrifice that one can only merit its powerful virtue only if one personally dedicates oneself to the task. The ‫עשירית האיפה‬, the tenth of an Ephah; the Omer, a result of much concerted effort that brought about this refined end product, embodies this very idea! • May we take advantage of the remaining days of the Omer to prepare and devote ourselves adequately so that we may be worthy of the greatness that awaits us with the receiving of the Torah anew on Shavuot.



B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M



MAY 11, 2017

Torah Thought

Emor A Time for All Things By Rabbi Silber

“And you shall count for yourselves, from the morrow of the rest day from the day you bring the omer as a wave offering seven weeks; they shall be complete. You shall count until the day after the seventh week, [namely,] the fiftieth day, [on which] you shall bring a new meal offering to the Lord (Vayikra 23:15-16).”

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

God commanded us to count the days

from Pesach leading up to Shavuos. A seemingly simple commandment aimed at linking these two experiences. We are taught that Exodus was not an ends; it was a means to receive the Torah at Mount Sinai. We were not taken out of Egypt simply to be free and without a human master. We were emancipated because we had (and have) something to contribute. Our nation has the ability to be a light unto the nations. But in order for the light to burn

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and illuminate there must be fuel. The Torah is our fuel, the commandments are the oil for our national wick allowing us to burn bright and dispel the darkness. We count the days from Pesach to Shavuos to remind ourselves that our freedom must be used for spiritual accomplishment. We count the days of Omer to remind ourselves of our national mandate to make this world a better place. There is something very interesting about the verbiage used in the verse quoted above. The Torah does not simply tell us “to count,” rather, God instructs us, “And you shall count for yourselves, U’Sfartem Lachem.” What is the meaning of this phrase “Lachem, for you”? It is intriguing that a number of our initial commandments and mitzvos share a common theme – time. The first national mitzvah was Kiddush HaChodesh, sanctification of the new moon. God told Moshe, “HaChodesh HaZeh Lachem Rosh Chodashim, this month is for you the first of all months (Shemos 12:2).” Again, we see this same word “Lachem, for you.” Two of our initial commandments – both focused on time. Perhaps, God was trying to convey to us an all-important lesson for meaningful living. Kiddush HaChodesh (sanctification of the new month) reminds us that we control our months and Sefiras HaOmer (the counting of the days between Pesach and Shavuos) reminds us that we control our days and our weeks. We control our time. Time humbles all men. Influence, power and connections can get you many things. But the one thing that no amount of “protexia” can procure and acquire for you – is time. Time is a finite, non-renewable resource. No matter how much you yearn for more – you simply can’t create it. Although we can’t generate additional quantities of time – we can most definitely control the time we have been given. Time is the greatest treasure God bestowed upon us as a free nation. It is the currency of accomplishment and self-advancement. Without it you can do nothing, go nowhere; with it, the sky is the limit. People often say “if only I had more time - there are so many things I would like to do.”

These mitzvos remind us that we have complete autonomy over how we use our time. It is true – there may not be enough time to accomplish everything you want to accomplish – so choose carefully. Decide what is important and focus your energies. We are limited in the duration of our time in this world, but have sole discretion as to how to use the time we are given. Time is the start-up capital for our greatest initiative – life. Invest it wisely. Perhaps, this is why the Torah uses the word “Lachem, for you” by both of the aforementioned commandments. God is not simply telling us to count. He is instructing us to “make it count for ourselves.” The month is yours – decide what you are going to accomplish. The week is yours – decide what needs to get done. The day is yours – contemplate how to maximize and squeeze precious meaning and productivity from every holy moment. Not a week goes by without a new “time saving device” being introduced in the technological marketplace. We are constantly connected, wired and plugged in. Ostensibly the goal of our devices is to maximize productivity and “save time.” But have we really saved any time? And even if we have, how do we use this newfound time-windfall? The reality is that for many of us the time saved is just used for more work. The additional time has not gone to our family, to our learning or to acts of chessed; it has gone to more emails, more meetings and more deals. For others this additional time has led to more time spent online surfing the net and posting every last bit of information (much of it too personal for public consumption) on one’s blog or Facebook page. Blogging, tweeting, friending and surfing have a (limited) place – but it can take over our life. Our time on this earth belongs to each of us. My hours and minutes belong to me and it is up to me to use them purposefully. As we bask in the after-glow of Pesach and feel the anticipatory excitement of Shavuos let us find the courage and strength to maximize our weeks, find the meaning in each day and take advantage of every moment.


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MAY 11, 2017

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The Big Picture



MAY 11, 2017

Parshas Emor – First Impressions Last By Rabbi Motty Rabinowitz

Sitting at my work desk a few years ago, I vividly remember the day when a potential software-engineer hire walked through the office toward the conference room for an interview, dressed in torn jeans and a tank top. To this day, I do not have the foggiest idea where he thought he was going with such attire. As you can imagine, his wardrobe choices did not inspire confidence in his future. In this week’s Torah reading, while detailing the specific laws pertaining to the Kohanim, we are told that a Kohen who has specific visible deformities, though he can partake in eat-

ing the sacrifices, cannot serve in the temple. In current politically-correct society, this would appear blatantly discriminatory. What is the reasoning behind such a prohibition? Rashi (21:18) attempts to explain the prohibition quoting the verse in Malachi (1,8): “‫ – ”הקריבהו נא לפחתך‬Would you offer this to your (Persian) governor? This verse is referring to offering up sacrifices in the temple that are of inferior nature. If we wouldn’t give such an item as a gift to the president, we shouldn’t be bringing it to the temple either. Rashi clearly assumes


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that it is not only the object that can be inappropriate, but also the person bringing it. It is simply not proper to approach the temple in a less than pristine condition. A very different approach is taken by the Sefer Hachinuch (Mitzva 275). He theorizes that it is not the inappropriateness that is the issue, it is the fact that it diminishes the Kohanim’s stature. It is an unfortunate part of the human condition that we are affected by what we see, and we judge very quickly based on first impressions. It is claimed that up to 93% of communication comes from non-verbal cues including physical appearance, dress and body language. The Kohanim, who were part of the spiritual leadership of the nation had to be extremely careful not to create negative vibes regarding their positions and the temple service. In temple times, people would visit Jerusalem perhaps three times a year. Gentile tourists would also frequent the temple. These visits were their opportunities to be inspired by the Kohanim and the temple service, and would give them a window into the Torah. If their visit involved watching a hunchback Kohen in the temple, it would probably lead to scoffing if not downright mockery of the Kohanim and the temple. As shallow as it may seem, the Torah recognizes human reality. The need to leave no room for negative impressions, was not limited to the Kohanim. We find similar laws regarding all forms of leadership. The Talmud (Sanhedrin 22b) describes the haircut schedule for a king, Kohen-Godol and regular Kohanim. A king had a daily haircut. As the figurehead for the Jewish nation, if was vital that he looked impeccable. He was also not allowed to be seen in a less than presentable state, for example when he went to the bathhouse.

We find a parallel requirement for Torah Scholars. The Talmud (Shabbos 114a) states that a ‘Torah scholar who has a food stain on his clothes is worthy of death’. He is viewed as a representative of the Torah, and must ensure that his appearance does not inadvertently cause others to mock it. While Torah scholars throughout the generations often lived in abject poverty with few physical possessions, it was incumbent on them to present themselves publicly in a pristine manner. (Ha’amek Dovor Breishis 49:14) While this seems most pertinent to people in leadership positions, it is in fact relevant to all of us individually. On Shavuos morning we will read that we are to be a “‫ – ”ממלכת כהנים‬a nation of priests. It is unclear what this means. The Seforno explains that the Jewish People are meant to be spiritual ambassadors to the whole world, to bring them closer to a divine reality. On that note, I would like to share a personal story. When we were first married, my wife and I were lucky enough to spend a week on a small island in the Bahamas. On the way home, we were waiting at the shack that they called an airport, to fly back to the US. I noticed a local lady constantly watching us. After a few minutes, she hesitantly approached and asked, “Are you Jewish?”. After I replied, “Yes”, she requested, “Can I please take a picture with you? I am so honored to meet a Jew. You are so holy!” We are sometimes unaware of what the outside world thinks when they see a Jew. The way we carry ourselves publicly, the way we talk and behave publicly, the way we handle our business dealings, can have untold impact on the people around us. Like the Kohanim, we must recognize our role and live up to our mission.

“Say What?!”

Give me salt and vinegar and I’ll eat his liver. - Philippine President Rodrigo Duterte on what he would do if his police catch any radical Islamic terrorists in his country

- Baltimore Mayor Catherine Pugh, one year after Black Lives Matter took to the streets of Baltimore and essentially convinced police that doing their jobs will only result in them getting into trouble

I believe that George Soros must not be underestimated: he is a powerful billionaire of enormous determination who, when it comes to his interests, respects neither G-d nor man. - Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orbán in a speech in the European Parliament, defending its actions regarding immigration and against American financial speculator George Soros

MAY 11, 2017

I’m calling on all the assistance we can possibly get because I can’t imagine going into our summer months with our crime rate where it is today, what that’s going to look like by the end of the summer?! Murder is out of control.


Notable Quotes


On Twitter this morning, Donald Trump suggested the U.S. needs a “good shutdown” to fix a deadlocked Congress. I don’t think Donald Trump realizes that the government is not like a computer. You can’t fix it by turning it off and turning it back on again. - James Corden

- Department of Homeland Security Secretary John Kelly on CNN talking about a proposal that would prevent laptops and similar devices from being brought on planes

An Australian family managed to save the life of a lizard they found at the bottom of their pool by performing CPR on it… I consider myself a confident guy. But I have never ever, not even after six drinks, thought to myself, “I could probably give CPR to a lizard.” That family revived the lizard by performing CPR for 30 minutes. I give up looking for the TV remote after 25 seconds. - James Corden

Defendants’ faces were blank all the time… absolutely blank…like…they’re waiting for a bus. - Ben Ferencz, 97, who was one of the prosecutors at the Nuremberg trials, recalling in a “60 Minutes” interview the lack of remorse that the Nazis exhibited during the trials

The Republicans cruelly ignored a rapidly spreading epidemic as they crafted the partial repeal of Obamacare that passed in the House yesterday: They failed to include any provision in AHCA that provides mental health benefits for balmy liberals whose thin tether to sanity has been severed by the success of the GOP and President Trump. - David Catron, The American Spectator


B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

I guess they’d be forced to read a book or a magazine or talk to their kids.


MAY 11, 2017

44 Hamas believes in, and adheres to, managing its Palestinian relations on the basis of pluralism, democracy, national partnership, acceptance of the other and the adoption of dialogue. Hamas believes that the message of Islam upholds the values of truth, justice, freedom and dignity and prohibits all forms of injustice and incriminates oppressors irrespective of their religion, race, gender or nationality. Hamas is of the view that the Jewish problem, anti-Semitism and the persecution of the Jews are phenomena fundamentally linked to European history and not to the history of the Arabs and the Muslims or to their heritage. Islam is a religion of peace and tolerance. It provides an umbrella for the followers of other creeds and religions who can practice their beliefs in security and safety.

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

-Most laughable lines from Hamas’ just released policy document

Today, FBI Director James Comey said the thought that he helped Donald Trump get elected president makes him “mildly nauseous.” Comey then excused himself to attend a meeting of Underreacters Anonymous.

I was thinking, when I watched those forced smiles yesterday at the White House, this is what it’s like in Pyongyang, in North Korea, where you have to have the same expression for Kim Jong-Un or else you get executed. They didn’t look truly spontaneously happy, but fixed grins and smirks all around. - MSNBC’s Chris Matthews reflecting on the Republicans’ White House ceremony after the House passed the Obamacare repeal bill

What else do I have to prove? Seriously, what else would I have [to do]? I’ve won championships, I won my first one, and I’ve won for my teammates; I came home and won. There isn’t anything I have left to prove. - Lebron James, in an interview with

- Conan O’Brien

There’s a part of Israel in every F-35 that’s ever been built. - Lockheed Martin senior executive Gary North speaking at Israel’s Fisher Institute for Air and Space Strategic Studies

Na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na, hey, hey, hey, goodbye. - The childish chant that Nancy Pelosi and the Democrats on the House floor chanted when the Obamacare repeal bill passed, based on their belief that it will cause the Republicans to lose their majority in the House




China should no longer try to test the limits of the DPRK’s patience. China had better ponder over the grave consequences to be entailed by its reckless act of chopping down the pillar of the DPRK-China relations. - North Korea’s official state-run news agency rebuking China for trying to pressure North Korea to curb its nuclear ambitions

– Conan O’Brien

It started as a way of promoting peace, and then I went on to find something that was very calming.

Look, it is none of anyone’s business what someone who is a member of the private sector decides to accept in terms of compensation. With all due respect to anyone who chooses to comment publicly on what Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, or anyone earns as a member of the private sector, it’s just MYOB.

- Catherine Hettinger, who invented fidget spinners, telling CNN that she originally invented the gadget after a visit to Israel to help prevent Palestinian kids from throwing rocks at Israelis

- Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, D-Fla, former head of the Democrat National Committee and one of the most prominent “anti-one percenters,” when asked on CNN about Obama getting paid by a Wall Street firm $400,000 for one speech

- Conan O’Brien


Jim Comey didn’t tell her not to campaign in Wisconsin after the convention. Jim Comey didn’t say not to put any resources in Michigan until the final week of the campaign. And one of the things that hindered her in the campaign was a sense that she never fully was willing to take responsibility for her mistakes, particularly that server. And, you know, so if I were her, if I were advising her, I would say don’t do this, don’t go back and appear as if you are shifting responsibility off of yourself. She said the words I am responsible, but everything else suggested she doesn’t feel that way and I don’t think that helps her in the long run. So if I were her, I would move on. - David Axelrod, Obama’s former chief strategist, on CNN responding to Hillary Clinton’s assessment last week that she only lost the election because of then-FBI Director James Comey

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

German Chancellor Angela Merkel says she is confident that fake news will not harm her chances in Germany’s election. In fact, Merkel is so confident she’s going to win, she’s not even going to campaign in Wisconsin.

MAY 11, 2017

A company has come out with a robot that makes salad. So finally – a robot that’s not going to take away any American jobs!



MAY 11, 2017


OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home



You gotta be


A mother is trying to get her son to eat his carrots. She says, “You know they’re good for your eyes.” The son says, “How do you know that?” The mom replies, “Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?”

Centerfold ?

Riddle me


For being good during their shopping outing, a mother gave each of her four children two candies. Jack had an orange candy. The child who had a red one also had a blue one. No child had two candies of the same color. The child who had a green candy also had a red one. Sara didn’t have a red candy and Danny had a green one. Miri didn’t have an orange one and Jack had no blue sweets. Knowing that there were two candies of each color, can you tell the colors of the sweets each child had? Answer to riddle: Jack had an orange and a green candy. Sara had an orange and a blue one. Miri had a red and a blue candy. Danny had a green and a red one.

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Things My Mother Taught Me ANTICIPATION... “Just wait until your father gets home.”

ENVY… “There are millions of children who wish they had that toy.”

RECEIVING... “You are going to get it when we get home!”

IRONY… “Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about!”

JUSTICE... “One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like

you...then you’ll see what it’s like!” CHALLENGES... “What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don’t talk back to me!”

LOGIC… “Because I said so, that’s why.” MEDICAL SCIENCE... “If you don’t eat those vegetables you will never grow.”

HUMOR... “When you fall down and break your foot, don’t come running to me.”

HYPOCRISY… “If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times, don’t exaggerate!”

WISDOM… “When you get to be my age, you will understand.”

ROOTS... “Do you think you were born in a barn?”

CLEANLINESS… “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning the floor.”

GENETICS... “You’re just like your father.”

RELIGION… “You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

STAMINA… “You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

WEATHER… “This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015


47 1 2 4



You Mom



We Love



19. PTA 21. Sewing kit

15. Nachas

20. Sweater

13. Spaghetti

18. Love

12. Nap

17. Challah

7. Fever

16. Kiss

6. Carpool




14. Mitzva notes 11. Laundry

4. Coffee

10. Patience

3. Milk and Cookies

9. Homework

2. Uncle Moishy

8. Lullaby

1. Thank You




5. Flowers


17 18 19 20

MAY 11, 2017







1. What mom reminds you to say when going to your friend’s house

8. Song that puts you to sleep

2. Mom knows the lyrics to all his songs

9. Every night Chumash, spelling, math and science

3. After-school snack

10. Moms need an endless stream

4. Favorite morning pick-me-up

11. Don’t forget to add the fabric softener

5. What you should buy mom as often as possible

14. Letters to nursery teachers

6. What mom drives

16. First attempt to heal a boo-boo

7. Confirmed by hand to forehead

17. Nobody braids them better than Mom

12. What Mom would love to do on a Shabbos afternoon, once in a blue moon, at least

18. Unconditional ___________

13. Meatball’s natural partner

21. Tomato pincushion

20. What you wear when mom is cold

19. When parents get to hear what really goes on in school


What’s for supper? I’m hot… I’m cold… Can I have…? Can you take me to…? Can you call…? Can you help me with…? Where is my…?

Where are you going? When are you coming home? When are we going to? Can you pick me up from…?

Can you buy me a new Fidget Spinner? He took my Fidget Spinner! Where’s my Fidget Spinner? Can you fix my Fidget Spinner?

Can you drop me off at…? Can we go shopping? Can I stay home from school? Can you tell him to stop bothering me? Can you help me with my homework?


If I behave can I get another Fidget Spinner? Where’s Mom?

We Love You Mom!

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15. What all children should give their parents on silver platters



MAY 11, 2017

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410-653-2000, EXT. 840







OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home


Dating Dialogue

MAY 11, 2017

Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters


What Would You Do If… Dear Navidaters,

I went out with a guy who took me to the movies. Since it was our third date, I felt comfortable telling him that I was very thirsty and asked him politely if he wouldn’t mind buying me a bottle of water. When we walked over to the concession stand and he heard the ridiculous price of a bottle of water (and it was ridiculous), he said that he wouldn’t spend that amount of money for water. The fact is, for some reason, I was terribly thirsty and really needed some water. I pulled out my wallet and bought the water for myself. After that, he seemed kind of cold toward me and said he felt I was being very wasteful. (He nevertheless did ask me out again.)

On our second date, when we went out to dinner to a restaurant that was moderately expensive, and the waiter asked if we wanted dessert, he immediately said no, without asking me if I wanted any. I probably would have said no, but was surprised he didn’t even ask.

This particular young man is a hard worker. I don’t think he comes from a comfortable home and has worked hard for everything he has. I admire his work ethic and his sense of responsibility. There are many other things about him that I admire as well and we connect in many other areas. I just wonder whether something like a bottle of water and what it represents is a serious matter and something that I should take seriously. My father says, “No,” and my mother says, “Yes.” What say all of you?

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

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There were a few other instances when conversation surrounding money left me thinking that he was raised in a very frugal home and that he is quite cautious about money. I grew up in a comfortable home and we definitely enjoyed “living.” Every Sunday evening we go out to dinner and my father doesn’t hold back. We vacation once a year, and in general, I’m not used to hearing “no” to something I want. I don’t feel I’m spoiled or take advantage of my parent’s generosity, but we all live nicely.


MAY 11, 2017


The Panel The Rebbetzin Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S.


ou have seen the young man act more than once with insensitivity, lack of consideration and with strong control, ignoring your interests. Why do you think he is still to be considered? Why are you rationalizing his cheapness and lack of decency with explanations about his family background and work ethic? Search within yourself and seek some help to explore why you are even entertaining the thought of continuing a relationship. You are at risk of marrying someone who will abuse you.

The Shadchan Michelle Mond

I The Mother Sarah Schwartz Schreiber, P.A.


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believes that, once financially more secure and with the guidance and encouragement of a loving, generous wife, he will probably loosen the purse strings. If you’re willing to risk that possibility, have a frank conversation with the guy about your different spending styles. After hearing his opinion on money matters, you can better decide whether to bail or invest your future with him.

ur chachamim have taught us that to really judge a character, one must observe him “b’kiso (his pocket)…” In real terms, is he generous or a cheapskate? The thinking goes that one’s attitude towards spending may extend to other areas of life. One who is – ahem – more “budget-conscious” may be less generous of spirit in other areas of life (e.g., withholding compliments, controlling the family budget, prohibiting his spouse to “do her own thing”). From that perspective, you have observed a young man with a diametrically different attitude towards spending than your own and your families’. Mr. Tap Water marrying Ms. Perrier? Not a good idea. But wait! In the interest of full disclosure, my husband had an entirely different take on your dilemma. He felt that the young man, because he is probably in the early stages of career or, perhaps, still in school, has a more restricted budget. Why spend money he doesn’t have to try and impress you? From that point of view, he was demonstrating fiscal responsibility. My husband

t is possible to have a loving, long-lasting relationship with somebody who has different opinions about finances – if you are able to communicate these differences and come to realistic terms and a respect and mutual understanding. That being said, it seems as if the two of you are coming from opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to ideas about money. There are many girls who would turn away immediately when the cashier asks for $4 for a bottle of water and drink from the water fountain instead. In this sort of circumstance, she wouldn’t have any issue with him turning away the possibility of getting an expensive drink. She would actually find it a bonus that he had that similar mindset. You seem to be coming from opposite ends, and although it bothers you, you do still value many of his respectable traits. Firstly, you should note that doing these things on a date so early on shows how engrained it is into who he is, so don’t go into a marriage thinking you will change him. You say you are used to many luxuries and a high class lifestyle. If that is undoubtedly the life you’re looking to live, this shidduch does not

seem suitable for you. If, however, you have dated a while and have yet to meet anyone who has the many wonderful qualities that he has, I suggest you have a very open discussion with him about the topic so that you know what you’re dealing with. You will have to be willing to change your lifestyle and adapt to his mindset, as well as communicate to him the things about your lifestyle that you would find hard to live without. If you can mutually agree on working together to create an equilibrium, where he bends towards your needs and you bend towards his needs, you’ll work through it and feel like a million bucks. If, however, after the con-

Mr. Tap Water marrying Ms. Perrier? Not a good idea.

versation you see he is very set in his ways and there is a “no compromise” attitude, you will have to consider your personal feelings around marrying somebody with such a different attitude toward spending and lifestyle. This is not something your parents (or anyone) can answer for you. It is indeed something you will need to think about and decide for yourself, as it is not easy to suddenly live a completely opposite life from what you’re used to.

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The Single Tova Wein here are important things that two people have to agree upon in order to have a harmonious marriage and then there are IMPORTANT things that must be agreed upon! One’s relationship with money falls under the latter category. Money is meaningful in a marriage because it signifies so many different things. It can be used as a tool for control; it can represent one’s desire to be generous, hopeful and kind. Money also represents the lifestyle that one has become accus-

The Navidaters Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists


camper. Additionally, we usually reserve our strong opinions for much later in the dating game. Telling you “you are wasteful” so early on signals to me that this young man feels inappropriately comfortable with you on your third date. He is more concerned about money than your feelings. From the way you describe his behavior, I have to wonder if these are the red flags unhappy spouses wish they would have recognized earlier on. 2. “On our second date, when we went out to dinner to a restaurant that was moderately expensive, and the waiter asked if we wanted dessert, he immediately said no, without asking me if I wanted any.” Whether this is a sign of immaturity or something more ominous in nature, he did not take a moment to consider your needs. Yes, we

I am more interested in his behavior toward you after you made the decision to spend your own money.

your hand and help you get past your anxiety so that you can move on with your life in a meaningful way.

are only talking about dessert on a second date… I understand that. Most people would have the emotional intelligence and sensitivity to turn to the other human being present and acknowledge their existence in that moment. Even if his reason was that he could not afford the dessert, the right thing to do would have been to make eye contact with you and even give you an embarrassed or uncomfortable look. There is a lack of emotion here that is worrisome to me. I am starting to sense a pattern. 3. You mentioned there were a few other instances in which the conversation around money left you wondering if he was raised in a frugal home. I am curious whether the other conversations around money left you feeling badly – like the two instances you were specific about. In conclusion, there are two issues here. The first is the different ways you two spend money. The second is the way he interacts with you around the topic of money. If he does not take your thoughts,

needs or feelings into account (that is not to say he spends money because you want him to, but that he speaks to you respectfully) that’s a far more serious issue in my book. If you notice a pattern of this behavior, you will have to ask yourself if you want to deal with this for the rest of your life. Dating is a time to get to know someone and figure out if they are suitable for you. I understand that you connect in other ways, but if this bothers you now, you cannot assume it will go away or that it won’t bother you in the future. It is my opinion that in this situation Mother knows best. Sincerely, Jennifer

Esther Mann, LCSW and Jennifer Mann, LCSW are licensed psychotherapists and dating and relationship coaches working with individuals, couples and families in private practice in Hewlett, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 516.224.7779. Press 1 for Esther, 2 for Jennifer. Visit for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email thenavidaters@ You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

oney differences aside, I find the way he speaks to you distasteful. The following statements are potential red flags to me: 1. “After that, he seemed kind of cold toward me and said he felt I was being very wasteful.” You bought the water for yourself after he said he wouldn’t spend that kind of money. I am not judging his sensibilities about spending his money wisely or carefully. I am more interested in his behavior toward you after you made the decision to spend your own money. I would like to understand more about his “coldness.” How does he feel about the woman in his life disagreeing with him or doing what works for her? Will he always respond coldly? Some people ignore their spouses for lengthy periods of time after a disagreement. The spouse of such a person is usually not a very happy


MAY 11, 2017

Pulling It All Together

than being practical. He doesn’t. That says a lot about where the two of you are coming from. Though there’s nothing wrong with being practical and economical, that’s not the world you’re used to and, my guess, not the world you want to live in. For that reason, I think you two would be looking at a future of serious disagreements on a very important topic if you continued together. Lucky you – you seem to have a lot going for you. So hopefully, you will continue to have opportunities come your way. And when the next wonderful man does come along, you’ll be working with a therapist who can figuratively hold



tomed to. You obviously come from a comfortable background and money has enabled your family to live quite beautifully. It sounds like this young man has never experienced the comforts that you have and probably finds the things you do to be frivolous. He certain doesn’t relate to it. It’s not a matter of who is right and who is wrong. It’s a matter of what you are both used to. Though we’re only talking about a bottle of water, of all things, it does tell a story. If you told him that you’re feeling really thirsty, even though the water was totally overpriced, you believe your comfort level in the moment is more important

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

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MAY 11, 2017



The Observant Jew

Motherless on Mother’s Day In Honor of Blanche Davids Gewirtz a”h

By Rabbi Jonathan Gewirtz


his week, people around the nation will do something special for their mothers. The idea of Mother’s Day in the United States can be credited to a woman who never married nor had children of her own, Anna Jarvis. Her mother had often expressed a wish that someday people would take the time to thank and honor their mothers for their sacrifices and hard work. Anna never forgot that and when her mother passed away in 1905 she resolved to make it a reality. She started by sending carnations, her mother’s favorite flower, to her local church in Grafton, West Virginia. She then began a letter-writing campaign to people in positions of power asking them to establish a day for honoring mothers. Her efforts paid off, and in 1914 President Woodrow Wilson signed a joint resolution designating the second Sunday in May as Mother’s Day. Over time, it became a much more commercial holiday, with focus on cards, flowers, and gifts, and by the end of her life, Anna Jarvis was disappointed that it had turned into something quite different than she intended originally. With that introduction, let’s go back in time to 2013. That’s when I wrote the following: This is the first Mother’s Day I can remember that I won’t be able to call my mother, hug her, or give her a card. She passed away barely two weeks ago, and it seems that the whole world is rubbing it in. E-mails bombard me with reminders saying, ‘Don’t forget Mom on her special day!” Billboards, commercials, and internet ads offer

up flowers, cakes, and various gifts, while signs near hotels proclaim, “Mother’s Day Brunch!” How can they intrude on me like this? Where is their sensitivity? Don’t they know that I don’t have a mother anymore? Why must they torment me and rub salt in the alltoo-fresh wound? Of course, these signs are meant

lieve and trust that when I act properly here on Earth, she is receiving pleasure, pride, and reward for her role in making me who I am. Perhaps I can’t send her flowers, but if I smile at someone and brighten their day, haven’t I done the same thing? I made the world a more beautiful place, and it’s because that’s what my Mommy taught me.

for everyone else. They’re meant for me to treat my wife, the mother of my children, to something special. But I can’t help thinking about MY mother when even the cashier at the supermarket wishes me a Happy Mother’s Day. But am I really motherless? I don’t think so. I still have the lessons she taught me; I still have the upbringing she gave me. I just don’t have her physical presence here. Is it too late for me to give her gifts and show her my appreciation? Thankfully, it’s not, because I believe in Hashem, in the afterlife, and in the eternal nature of the soul. I believe that the deeds I do earn her Brownie points in Heaven. I be-

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that there is something I can do for my mother. It doesn’t cost $19.95, it doesn’t need to be watered, and I don’t even have to put on a suit for it. This Mother’s Day, I can get my mother a reputation. By behaving in a way that shows I had a mother, someone who guided me in how to live and how to treat others, someone who taught me to revel in the beauty of G-d’s world and be in awe of His meticulous planning, I’m teaching people that my Mom did a good job in raising me. Am I really motherless? Not at all. Everyone who meets me can see her influence and know that not

only did I have a mother, but I had a great one. So this Mother’s Day, I won’t forget Mom – and neither will anyone else. It’s now some years later and I still find myself doing things to honor my mother. However, it’s more than just an intentional desire to tell people about her. What motivated Anna Jarvis was hearing what her mother said. She took this in and it shaped her values. It’s the same for me. My life has been shaped by things my parents valued, and my children’s lives will be shaped by what I deem important. Recognizing the impact we have on others, and the impact others have on us, can go a long way to making sure that we prioritize the right things and convey appropriate values to those who will be influenced by us. Then, unlike Anna Jarvis, we will never have to regret that our efforts resulted in fluff and commercialism, because we will make the world a better place and give our mothers reason to be very proud. Jonathan Gewirtz is an inspirational writer and speaker whose work has appeared in publications around the world. You can find him at RabbiGewirtz, and follow him on Instagram @RabbiGewirtz or Twitter @ RabbiJGewirtz. He also operates, where you can order a custom-made speech for your next special occasion. Sign up for the Migdal Ohr, his weekly PDF Dvar Torah in English. E-mail and put Subscribe in the subject. © 2017 – All Rights Reserved



‫שלא נהגו כבוד זה בזה‬ By Azi Rosenblum

on a video clip or your 140 character version of something. At the same time, there is something to be said for the inexcusable way that some companies have put operational efficiency above all else which can often dehumanize the consumer when they put profits and operations before the average Joe. This is more than just “not nice” – it’s 2017, and you can’t get away with it anymore because the customers are more powerful than ever. The fact is that while we all benefit from the common airline practice of overbooking (higher occupancy on flights means they can keep costs lower), these operational strategies can sometimes overtake common sense and human decency, which results in the confident and sadly all-too-common “sorry sir/ma’am, I’m just doing my job” attitude. If a policy exists for creating efficient and positive results most of the time, there should be an excellent plan in place for how to handle the other times. Clearly, that was not the case on Flight 3411. Customer service (often abbreviated as CS) hinges on two things: Communication and Solutions. When either party is not communicating properly or is not working toward mutually acceptable solutions, neither the customer nor the company is doing any service to the another. As consumers in this age of communication, I truly feel that we have gone too far. Customers are too quick to take their grievances to the stage of public opinion, and companies (especially the big ones) are losing sight of the people

that make up the numbers. To strike a balance, we need to have mutual respect and always take a moment to put things in context. Yes, my soup was cold, but this is one of hundreds of soups I have had at this establishment. Maybe I should just ask for it to be heated up without getting heated up on social media?

This article is dedicated to the memory of my friend Duane Carpenter, a man who epitomized the values of customer service in his uniquely dutiful, delightful and joyful style. His smile, his funny hat, and his energetic greetings at the Smith Ave. Shoppers always made me feel like a million bucks! Duane, who was recently moved to another location, died suddenly of a stroke last week. He was a great guy, and really knew how to make customers feel great while doing his job, as he would often chant “thank you for shopping Smith Ave. Shoppers… 2801 Smith Ave!” Azi Rosenblum is a business consultant and the founder and CEO of RemSource, an outsourced provider of administrative and bookkeeping services for small businesses. To suggest a topic or ask a question for a future #BizWiz column, email BizWiz@

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matter of minutes. Watching the fallout and reactions to the incident that happened on Flight 3411, there was a struggle that emerged in my mind. On the one hand, there is absolutely no excuse for that kind of violence and for a paying customer to be inconvenienced so the airline could get a staff member to their destination for a work flight. On the other hand, like it or not, the airline DOES have the right to take back that seat for which they offered compensation, and there was more than one seat needed, so I guess not everyone got a bloody nose that day. Would it be safe to assume that the conduct of the passenger had much to do with the direction the incident took? Then, and this is the part that concerns me most as a business owner, the incident goes viral and literally the entire world, is bashing United Airlines. United operates 4,496 departures daily. Worldwide, the estimates are nearly 100,000 airline flights a day. One incident, on one flight, on this one day, and the daggers come out as if United, and the airline industry at large, are not performing the astonishing feat of moving people through the air and across great lands and oceans while feeding and entertaining them, mostly without incident. Seriously? Hysterical much? Communication today has made it such that when you complain, you have an audience of immeasurable size. It’s not just you calling customer service - it’s you on stage, a huge stage, and everyone gets to sit back and watch, draw conclusions and make judgements based

MAY 11, 2017

United Airlines: the irony begins with the name. Although it’s basically ancient history in the world of social media, the early April incident gone viral portrays an almost unimaginable but telling story of the growing divide between customers and companies. As a business owner, a business advisor, and a consumer (now and then when I get out of the office), I must admit feeling conflicted about this whole situation. DISCLAIMER: No… I don’t think a broken nose is ever an acceptable part of your airline experience; please don’t tweet about me yet, keep reading. If you study the history of “customer service” you will notice an unmistakable parallel between communication technology and the growth of customer service departments and practices in business. Prior to the invention of the telephone, the consumer was so far removed from corporations and factories that they were essentially powerless and disconnected if anything went wrong. Sure, you dealt with the local shop or supplier, and they of course had their own interest in serving their customers well, but consumers and clients certainly did not have the upper hand. With the invention of the telephone in 1879 (nice job, Alexander), followed by switchboards in 1894, rotary dial phones in the 1920’s, and eventually our first call centers in the ‘60s, the relationship between company and consumer has become more direct, instant, and demanding than ever in a world where you can tweet to international airlines and they will reply in a

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

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MAY 11, 2017



Political Crossfire

Trump: “Normalized” but Still Scary By Charles Krauthammer


ith near unanimity, my never-Trump friends confess a sense of relief. It could have been worse. They thought it would be worse. A deep apprehension still endures but the international order remains intact, the republic still stands, and no “enemy of the people” has (yet) been arrested. Admittedly, this is a low bar. And this is not to deny the insanity, incoherence and sheer weirdness emanating daily from the White House, with which we’ve all come up with our own coping technique. Here’s mine: I simply view President Trump as the Wizard of Oz. Loud and bombastic. A charlatan. Nothing behind the screen – other than the institutional chaos that defines his White House and the psychic chaos that governs his ever-changing mind. What to do? Ignore what’s behind the curtain. Deal with what comes out in front: the policy, the pronouncements, the actions. And so far they hang together enough – Neil Gorsuch, Keystone XL, NATO reassurances, Syria strike, Cabinet appointments – that one can begin to talk plausibly about the normalization of this presidency. Hence the relief. But there are limitations to the Wizard of Oz approach. Some things do extrude from behind the curtain that are hard to ignore. And here I am not counting the gratuitous idiocies that can, despite their entertainment val-

ue, be safely ignored – for example, Trump’s puzzlement as to why the Civil War was not avoided and how Andrew Jackson, who’d been dead 16 years, was so upset by its outbreak. These are embarrassments, but they don’t materially affect the course of his presidency or of the country. Some weirdnesses, however, do. Such as, Trump’s late-April pronouncements on South Korea. Being less entertaining, they were vastly

And by the way, that 5-year-old U.S.South Korea free trade agreement is a disaster and needs to be torn up. Now, South Korea is in the middle of a highly charged presidential campaign. The pro-American president was recently impeached and is now under indictment. The opposition party is ahead. It is wary of the U.S., accommodating to North Korea and highly negative about installing that THAAD system on its soil. We had agreed with Seoul that

What is it with this president insisting that other people pay for things we want?

underreported. Here’s the context: Trump is orchestrating a worldwide campaign to pressure North Korea on its nukes and missiles. He dispatches (finally) the USS Carl Vinson strike group to Korean waters and raises the possibility of a “major, major conflict” with Pyongyang. Meanwhile, we are working furiously to complete a THAAD anti-missile system in South Korea to intercept North Korean rockets. At which point, out of the blue, Trump tells Reuters that Seoul will have to pay for the THAAD system.

they would provide the land and the infrastructure, and we would pay the $1 billion cost. Without warning, Trump reneges on the deal, saying South Korea will have to foot the bill. This stirs anti-American feeling and gives opposition candidate Moon Jae-in the perfect campaign issue. What is it with this president insisting that other people pay for things we want? And for what? In a $4 trillion budget, $1 billion is a rounding error. So self-defeating was the idea that within three days national se-

curity adviser H.R. McMaster had to walk it all back, assuring the South Koreans that we would indeed honor our agreement and send no $1 billion invoice. But the damage was done. Moon’s campaign feasted. The pro-American party was thrown on its heels. And the very future of THAAD – and a continued united front against Pyongyang under a likely Moon administration – is in doubt. As for the trade deal, the installation of THAAD has so angered China that it has already initiated an economic squeeze on South Korea. To which Trump would add a trade rupture with the United States. The South Korean blunder reinforces lingering fears about Trump. Especially because it was an unforced error. What happens in an externally caused crisis? Then, there is no hiding, no guardrails, no cushioning. It’s the wisdom and understanding of one man versus whatever the world has thrown up against us. However normalized this presidency may be day to day, in such a moment all bets are off. What happens when the red phone rings at 3 in the morning? I’d say: Let it ring. Let the wizard sleep. Forward the call to Defense Secretary Mattis.

(c) 2017, The Washington Post Writers Group



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Forgotten Her es Yossi Ben Hanan


MAY 11, 2017

By Avi Heiligman

The rescue mission of Brig. Gen. Yossi Ben Hanan, with Yoni Netanyahu, during the Yom Kippur War

1945 in Yerushalayim while it was still under the British Mandate. His father, Michael Ben Hanan, was a top commander in the Haganah before the 1948 War of Independence. When he was just 16 Yossi joined a military school in Haifa and became a tanker upon conclusion of his schooling. During the Six Day War in 1967, he was a member of the 7 th Brigade and was involved in the action that liberated the Sinai Peninsula, Gaza and parts of the Suez Canal. He was featured on a famous cover of Life magazine after the war which showed him, as a young soldier, triumphantly clutching an AK-47 rifle

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uch has been written in recent months about the Netanyahu brothers and their service in the IDF. One particular incident that involved Yoni Netanyahu has made its rounds. However, there is more to the story than Yoni rescuing a tank commander during the Yom Kippur. Yoni received the Medal of Distinguished Service for his rescue of a badly wounded officer. That officer, Yossi Ben Hanan, was awarded a medal a step higher for actions that preceded Yoni’s dramatic rescue. Yossi Ben Hanan was born in

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while standing in the waters of the Suez Canal. Fighting between Israel and her neighbors continued in the years following the Six Day War. It was called the War of Attrition and it mainly involved raids and quick actions taken by both sides. Yossi was a tank commander on the Suez Canal during this time. After the death of Egyptian President Nasser in 1970 there was relative peace for almost three years. Intelligence failures have changed the course of history. During WWII the U.S. failed to act on any info they may have gotten on Japanese preparations to attack Pearl Harbor or the German attack on their lines during the Battle of the Bulge. Being able to know where and when the enemy will strike is vitally important to military strategy. Israeli intelligence failed to pick up on the Arabs’ plan to attack on Yom Kippur, October 6, 1973. A large portion of the IDF is made up of reservists and most were not at their stations during the surprise attack. There were only a handful of tanks on the northern front. The Syrians had caught the Israelis looking the other way when they attacked

in the Golan Heights. One reservist, Zvika Greengold, hitchhiked to the front and singlehandedly became a one man tank destroyer. However, commanders were needed, and soldiers began appearing from all over during the first few days of battle. Ben Hanan was on his honeymoon in Nepal when he heard of the attack on Israel. It took him three days and a series of flights to reach the 188th brigade’s command post on the Golan Heights. What he saw was a desperate situation. Many of the tanks had been knocked out, and the brigade had been decimated. Tankers were without tanks and leaders. Another officer, Shmuel Askarov, had pieced together a scratch fighting force of mainly Centurion tanks. Already wounded in the fighting, Ben Hanan was tasked to lead this force of about twenty tanks. As a lieutenant colonel he was given command of what was left of the brigade and upon arrival immediately set up the command to become a fighting force again. He recruited men from supply depots and even walking wounded from the hospitals to man the tanks. There was a desperate battle be-

57 was hit by a Sagger anti-tank missile and he was stranded on the battlefield. A rescue attempt had failed once so the best forces in the area, a

call in artillery strikes on the Syrian tanks. Yoni’s force of commandos reached Ben Hanan’s position and sent him to the hospital. The Syrians

Despite being wounded and unable to fight Ben Hanan used his forward position to call in artillery strikes on the Syrian tanks.

were in retreat due to Ben Hanan’s scratch unit, and even though he wasn’t on the battlefield anymore the Syrians lost their will to fight. Only a day later the Israelis controlled the entire Golan Heights. Yossi Ben Hanan was wounded four times in that battle and was

Avi Heiligman is a weekly contributor to The

MAY 11, 2017

detachment of the Sayeret Matkal, were called in for the next attempt. In a recording that recently became available to the public Ben Hanan can be heard directing Yoni Netanyahu to his position. Despite being wounded and unable to fight Ben Hanan used his forward position to

awarded the Medal of Courage for his actions. Yoni continued fighting with the Sayeret Matkal and was the only commando killed in the dramatic Entebbe rescue mission in 1976. After the war Ben Hanan rose to the rank of major general and served as the commander in several units including the 7th Brigade and the Armored Corps. Unlike many soldiers during a surprise attack, Ben Hanan and many other IDF soldiers ran towards the fighting and not away from the battle. Ben Hanan is not as well-known as many heroes from the Yom Kippur War since he never entered politics but his story was written down for others to learn about his dedication to his country.


tween the IDF’s Centurion tanks and the Syrian’s T-62 Russian-built tanks. Ben Hanan managed to stabilize the situation by linking up with other units. They were behind enemy lines and starting firing on anything that moved – tanks, halftracks, and armored personal carriers all received direct hits from Bar Hanan’s unit. Besides the material damage to their tanks and armored vehicles, the psychological damage caused to the Syrians was immeasurable. The Syrians had failed to break through and soon enough had an intelligence failure of their own. They failed to realize that the Israelis were exhausted, had no reserves left, and were down to only a few shells per tank. The success that Ben Hanan was having at the expense of the Syrian force came at a price for the remaining IDF tanks. They had driven into a Syrian minefield and many of the tanks were disabled. His own tank

Jewish Home. He welcomes your comments and suggestions for future columns and can be reached at

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MAY 11, 2017

The Taxing History behind Cinco de Mayo


By Allan Rolnick

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mericans are great at taking perfectly serviceable holidays and turning them into excuses for parties. On St. Patrick’s Day, millions of Irish-for-a-day drinkers belly up to their favorite fake Irish bar to down pints of Guinness and shots of Jameson. Next on the calendar is Cinco de Mayo, when all those same St. Paddy’s fans become Mexicans for a day to down bottles of Corona and pitchers of margaritas. (We can’t wait to see what the hospitality industry dreams up when they discover Talk Like a Pirate Day lurking on the September calendar.) How many know the role that taxes played in putting those tangy salt-rimmed cocktails on your Happy Hour menu? Back in 1862, we were struggling in the midst of a wrenching civil war. And south of the border, Mexico had just finished one of their own. The ruling liberals had passed a series of laws that, among other things, let the government tax the dominant Catholic Church. The rival conservatives objected, with the dispute ultimately leading to war. After three years of fighting, the liberals prevailed. But incoming president Benito Juarez

found his Treasury empty, and he issued a decree suspending foreign debt repayment for two years. French Emperor Napoleon III wasn’t willing to just write off the loss. More importantly, he also spied a chance to take advantage of the turmoil here in the U.S. to reestablish French influence in the western

from 2,000 poorly equipped defenders. Everyone expected a rout — but it was the Mexicans who did the routing, firing downhill to pick off the advancers. The few French who reached the top faced machete-wielding Zacapoaxtla Indians, with depressingly predictable results. It was a small but symbolic

It was a small but symbolic victory that gave the Mexicans hope that they could repel the European invaders.

hemisphere. So he sent his army to the port of Veracruz to collect what Mexico owed. And his troops began marching down the road to Mexico City. Unfortunately for the French, that road led through the hilltop town of Puebla de Los Angeles. On May 5 — Cinco de Mayo — 6,000 French troops marched up Guadalupe Hill to take the town

victory that gave the Mexicans hope that they could repel the European invaders. Victory was short-lived. A year later, the French reached Mexico City and installed the Austrian Archduke Ferdinand Maximilian as Emperor of Mexico. But France wasn’t willing to actually support their new puppet-monarch with their

army. So, after three more years of chaos, Ferdinand and his top generals found themselves on the business end of a firing squad. Cinco de Mayo remained a little-noticed holiday until the 1980s, when beer marketers began using it as an excuse to promote their sudsy wares. Ironically, it’s barely celebrated at all in Mexico. We realize it’s a stretch to say that Mexico’s decision to tax the church led to your Cinco de Mayo celebration. But when you’re in the tax business, like we are, you see way too many things through that lens. And isn’t that what you want? A vigilant sentry, standing guard over your finances, wielding tax-saving strategies like a tribe of bloodthirsty Zacapoaxtalas wielding machetes? So call us when you’re ready to celebrate paying less ... and have a margarita on us! Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 yea rs in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at





MAY 11, 2017

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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home



A Shining Jew


MAY 11, 2017

By Rabbi Eugene Labovitz z”l and Dr. Annette Labovitz


ebbe Avraham of Slonim had occasion to spend a few days in an isolated inn located on the estate of a wealthy poretz. The

inn was leased to a Jew. Each morning, when he emerged from his room to join the other guests for breakfast, he noticed that the

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innkeeper had a shining countenance and seemed exceptionally happy. He wondered why the innkeeper could possibly be so happy, day after day. “Inn keeping is not a lucrative business,” thought the Rebbe. “It is apparent that this Jew barely ekes out a living. He has to serve peasants all day long. He has to keep the inn spotlessly clean. He is responsible to the poretz for the rent. I have to find the reason for his peaceful countenance.” After the other guests had gone, the Rebbe approached the innkeeper and introduced himself. “I am Rebbe Avraham, the Rebbe of Slonim,” he said. “I have been traveling, and I decided to stay in your inn a few days to rest. From the day I arrived, something has intrigued me. Can you please tell me to what you attribute your cheerful face?” At first the innkeeper was hesitant. “I’ve lived in this isolated area, far from a Jewish community all my life. I never had the benefit of a decent Jewish education. In fact, by most standards, you might call me an ordinary or illiterate Jew. I have very little contact with any of my people. I try to earn an honest living, but, believe me, it is very difficult to provide for my family.” The Rebbe still did not know why the innkeeper had such a contented

look. He persisted. “You live like many Jewish innkeepers, but none I have met have this special look that you have. Please, tell me your secret.” The innkeeper sighed. ”I do two things to remind myself that I am a Jew because I never had the opportunity to learn how to pray from a siddur. However, I do know that a Jew is supposed to pray. So every morning when I wake up, I recite: ‘Mo-deh ah-ne l’fah-neh-cha, I thank you Almighty, Master of the world, that while I slept, You have given my soul a soul bath, and I wake up pure and refreshed, ready to do Your will each morning.’ And every evening, before I retire for the night, I recite this one prayer: ‘O Master of the Universe, if You don’t think that I will live up to Your expectations tomorrow, then don’t awaken me. However, if you think that I will fulfill Your Will, then please bless me with another day.’” Joyful tears streamed down the face of the Rebbe. He had never heard such profound prayers. He now understood why the innkeeper was blessed with that look of peace and contentment. Reproduced with permission of the authors from A Touch of Heaven: Spiritual and Kabbalistic Stories for Jewish Living.


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Mental Health Corner


Fear of Abandonment

Many interpersonal issues that affect adults are a result of a challenging emotional issue which is known colloquially as fear of abandonment. As with many fears, the intense terror of losing a relationship can actually become a self-fulfilling prophecy and sabotage the very relationship that they were so afraid of losing. This can affect all types of relationships including marital, family, friends, and work relationships. Obviously, all human beings fear being abandoned, but when the fear is extreme it can be tremendously harmful. When one fears being abandoned, he is overly sensitive to any possible sign that a friend or family member is not as close to them as they had thought. For example, a friend may make an innocent remark that is perceived as insulting. The fear of abandonment will trigger a fear reaction which will make it feel as if that friend is severing the relationship even if it is the furthest thing from reality. He might lash out at his friend for being so “mean”. He can also be so consumed with the fear of losing a relationship that he will not be able to develop feelings of trust which is such a critical component of all relationships. Fear of abandonment can also cause the opposite effect, which is to stay in relationships at all costs in order to avoid the pain of being abandoned. This can cause someone

to stay in an unhealthy or abusive relationship since the alternative feels so dreadful to them. There are many factors in one’s life that might lead to the development of this fear. A common cause is parental neglect. When one was physically or emotionally abandoned as a child, it is possible that as the child grows into an adult he will fear being abandoned once again. A child can feel abandoned even if the parent is physically present, if his emotional needs for affection and sense of worth are not met. Divorce is a complicated issue and every divorce is different. Understandably, some divorces present a distinct risk of the child developing this fear. Parents who divorce must be aware that their children need the love, affection, and presence of both parents whenever and as much as possible in order to aid in the child’s development of a healthy sense of self and to give the child the emotional wellbeing that is needed to develop stable and nurturing relationships when they grow into adults. This is a service of Relief Resources. Relief is an organization that provides mental health referrals to the frum community. Rabbi Azriel Hauptman is the director of the Baltimore branch of Relief. He can be contacted at 410-448-8356 or at .


OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home





MAY 11, 2017


joy over the success of wheat crop harvests; only later was it stapled to the tragic plague in the first century CE that ravaged the yeshiva world of Rabbi Akiva from “Acco to Antipatros,” finally ceasing on Lag B’Omer, whose Hebrew gematria date (yud chet Iyar) cruelly equals orech chai, a “long life.” How many victims were there? We don’t know. The death statistics jump around: from 24,000 to 12,000 to 48,000 to only three hundred. The number is not important. The remembrance of the end of their suffering was. Lag B’Omer is thus a celebratory tribute and homage to life; “an oasis of joy, in the midst of a sad period,” notes Rabbi Pinchas Stolper. Yet the day is riddled with ambiguity and historic obscurity. The question is obvious: If R’ Akiva’s students died as punishment for their sins, why remember them in celebration? And although there is a general rabbinic consensus ominum on how to commemorate Lag B’Omer, there is none on why to commemorate it. Consider: Rav Yosef Karo of

Shulchan Aruch-fame says it’s dedicated to the end of a deadly epidemic plague. His Ashkenaz counterpart, Rav Moses Isserles, says it’s simply a symbolic suspension. Rav Isserles arrives at this conclusion by way of math. If you start with 49 days (between Pesach and Shavuos) and subtract the seven days of Pesach and all the in-between Shabbatot and Rosh Chodesh (because mourning is traditionally forbidden on these days anyway), one is left with...33! In other words, there is only 33 days of mourning anyway. I once heard a rav link the first 48 days of sefira to the Mishna’s 48 ways of achieving wisdom. But sefira is 49 days, I reminded him. The rav, quick-thinking and without missing a beat, said the extra day was “for summary.” Meanwhile, back to the Akiva tragedy. Rabbi David Segal, the 17 th-century Polish genius known as the Taz – an abbreviation of Turei Zahav, the title of his commentary on the Shulchan Aruch – and son-inlaw of R’ Yoel Sirkis of Brest (Bach),

was very uncomfortable linking Lag B’Omer with the affliction of R’ Akiva’s world – so he pushed the fast forward button and pinned the mourning minhagim to the First Crusaders obliterating entire German-French Jewish communities in 1096 and to Bogdan Chmielnicki’s Cossack’s knife-slicing butchery of the Jews in 1648-49 – both tragedies occurring during the sefira period. A hundred years later Rav Moses Schreiber (Moshe Sofer), the most powerful rosh yeshiva in Eastern Europe, disagreed. He rejected all the calamity linkage theories. He saw the day as celebratory. For what reason? To commemorate the first man that fell in the desert. Was this a unique spiritual insight? No. Like Rav Isserles it was an observation based on math tinkering. Here’s the Chasam Sofer’s timeline. Since the food supply (matzah) from Egypt only lasted until the 14th of Iyar – the end of the Pesach time frame, hence its choice as Pesach Sheni – the Jews went hungry for three days from the 15th to the 17 th. Then they complained. And the

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

ag B’Omer is a one-day semi-holiday when the laws of sefira mourning (the ban on marriages, listening to music, saying tachanun, cutting one’s hair, etc.) are all suspended so the Jewish world can play “catch-up” with delayed simchas and special festivities. Has sefirat ha’omer always been associated with semi-mourning? No. In fact, a quasi-melancholy omer period, although practiced during Talmudic times, is nowhere to be found in the Torah nor in any rabbinic texts before the eighth century. The earliest record of mandatory mourning surfaces in the Babylonian responsa from scholars who, unlike today, observed all the restrictions for the full 49 days; a respite for Lag B’Omer was totally unknown. It was not until the 12th century in Spain and southern France that we find the first mention of ceasing to mourn on Lag B’Omer. Even the prolific Rambam makes no references to any omer mourning laws. Why? Because the omer entered Jewish history as a period of anticipatory

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015



B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M


MAY 11, 2017

manna “appeared the following day” on the 18th of Iyar, i.e.: Lag B’Omer!


he challenge of Lag B’Omer is the underlining R’ Akiva fault line. Its death statistics are simply incomprehensible no matter what the number. I have heard all the possibilities and am still left in the dark, puzzled. The traditional view is well articulated in Turkish Rabbi Yaakov Culi’s M’am Loez (1730), probably the most important and popular Judaeo-Spanish (Latino) sefer ever published. The late R’ Aryeh Moshe Kaplan, the creative kabbalist from the Bronx whose family immigrated from Salonika, Greece, brought out the first English version as the Torah Anthology in the 1970s. Rav Culi makes a stunning allegation. He indicts Rabbi Akiva’s students for ignoring R’ Eleazer ben Azariah’s advice: Shelo nehagu kovod zeh bezeh, “respect one another.” What makes this accusation so personally jarring is the extraordinary ethical qualities of their great teacher who taught that to “love your fellow as you love yourself” was the over-riding principle of Torah. Rabbi Akiva is suddenly stripped of his students; twenty-four years of teaching, gone! The dream has turned into a nightmare. So embarrassed is he that he warns another generation, “Be not like them!” Isn’t this also a denunciation of R’ Akiva’s methods? How is it possible? The punishment seems so much greater than the transgression. And so many put to the plague? How does R’ Akiva react to the personal cataclysm engulfing him? Any other ordinary Jew would have been crushed by this loss. Not so Akiva, who demonstrated such great faith for the future that he simply plunged right back into the muddy waters of Roman rule and rebuilt a yeshiva, with a unique capacity of seeing potential future redemption in the face of utter devastation. A casual observer of Jewish history would be forgiven if assuming that this, the first and second century, were exemplary periods of Jewish leadership. Torah giants crisscrossed the Holy Land. Rabbi Akiva, R’ Eliezer, R’ Yehoshua ben

Levi, R’ Simeon bar Yochai, R’ Meir, R’ Yochanan ben Zakai; a remarkable array of men who sustained Torah study during perilous times, laying the basic foundation of Torah

to cheder each day to learn together. What inspired Akiva? According to legend he noticed a rock with a hole that went straight through it. What, he pondered, could be so powerful as

This was a pragmatic decision: for without study there can be no knowledge; without knowledge there could be no transmission of knowledge; without transmission there would be no future Jewish generations.

she-be’al peh as we know it today. Remember: this was a time when the Jews not only lived in their own land, but their life revolved around a festive Temple, a judicious Sanhedrin, a saintly priesthood, regimented sacrifices – and enormous batei medrash, Houses of Torah learning. Rav Akiva’s yeshiva alone had ten times more students than Lakewood, Mir, or Ponevezh has today. Very few rabbis led a life as spectacular and as romantic as that of Akiva ben Joseph, a Jew who, through sheer discipline and determination, rose from the lowly status of a poor widowed shepherd and son of an impoverished stricken proselyte father (Joseph) from the Galillee, to become one of the greatest rabbinical figures of all time. This meteoric rise began in the aristocratic house of Ben Kalba Savua, a member of the tribe of Judah and one of the wealthiest men of Jerusalem. Akiva, a working boy, is smitten by Rachel, his employer’s daughter. The idea of Akiva as his son-inlaw caused Savua great pain. This young suitor was so deeply illiterate in Torah that he refused to give his daughter a wedding dowry. The self-conscious suitor, to his credit, knew his father-in-law was right, and, as the quintessential ba’al teshuva, one unable to distinguish between an aleph and a bet at the age of forty, accompanied his young son

to carve a hole through a great stone? Akiva then saw a drop of water fall into the hole and concluded, “If a soft drop of water can make a hole in a hard stone, then the soft words of

Torah can penetrate an ignoramus as myself.” It was the constant dripping that eventually made an impression, however it still took the first drop (e.g.: learning alef beis) to begin the process that chipped away at the rock (of ignorance). Eventually, with his wife’s encouragement, Akiva bids farewell to family and home and goes off to the formidable Yeshiva of Lydda, rising in the ranks to become the respected head of Bet Hillel and the leading scholar in Judea. But his prominence catapulted him to the top of the government’s hit list. As Number One on the Roman’s Top Ten Most Wanted list, Jewish history was in turmoil. Judaism, during the First Temple, had revolved around the Torah and the prophets; now, during the Second Temple it revolved around the Talmud and the rabbis. With the Temple gone, nothing was left but the Scholar and the Sage. The national idea had shifted from warrior and priest to student


Rav Akiva’s yeshiva alone had ten times more students than Lakewood, Mir, or Ponevezh has today.

tion. Thousands of R’ Akiva’s “disciples,” the very backbone of Talmud Torah in the Holy Land, lacking civility? All of them? Lapsing in common

Consider the contrast: the rabbis of the Talmud reacted to Lag B’Omer as a devastating reminder of how a House Divided could lead to unbri-

Joe Bobker, alumnus of Yeshivas HaRav Kook in Jerusalem, is the former publisher and editor-in-chief of the Los Angeles Jewish Times, author of the popular Torah With a Twist of Humor and the 18-volume “Historiography of Orthodox Jews and the Holocaust,” the first of which, “War Against the Rabbis: Hitler’s Assault Against Judaism,” will be published this year around Shavuos. Mr. Bobker can be reached at

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een in this context, the death of R’ Akiva’s students, risking their lives in the face of Roman ruthlessness, as a punishment for a lack of middos seems incongruous, a self-contradic-

courtesy? How is this possible? How did such a golden age of potential piety deteriorate into distrust and disunity? Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, the seventh and last Lubavitcher Rebbe, linked the appalling internal disrespect to their inability to agree with each other’s interpretation of Rabbi Akiva’s words of Torah. Rather than agreeing to disagree in respect, they did so with venom, a behavioral virus that reflected poorly (chillul Hashem) on the whole spectrum of Torah. Chabad chassidus learns a core lesson from this: that all Jews must be seen in a positive and deferential light and that the only surefire antidote to brotherly hatred is unconditional brotherly love.

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tinue unabated. Why? Because Torah “is your life and the length of your days.” This was a pragmatic decision: for without study there can be no knowledge; without knowledge there could be no transmission of knowledge; without transmission there would be no future Jewish generations. As the Romans hounded and hunted those who dared teach and study, Rabbi Akiva set the example, raising the bar of Torah study to unprecedented heights.

dled catastrophe and designated this day as a reminder of a martyred generation of outstanding Jewish leaders who displayed enormous courage by risking their lives to maintain the study of Talmud under a turbulent Roman governorship. Today’s generation approaches Lag B’Omer as a warm, nature-loving semi-Jewish festival – to get a haircut. Are there any parallels with our own times? Yes. After the Holocaust we experienced not the end of the Jewish people but a restoration of Jewish independence and witnessed a Jewish army scoring miraculous multiple victories against overwhelming odds. Although Adolf, ym”sh, destroyed the great European centers of Torah scholarship, the survivors went on to rebuild yeshivas in Israel and America that led the way for a massive revival of Torah study and opened the gates for an unprecedented teshuva movement. Yet, although Jerusalem, the Temple Mount, and Judea-Samaria are once again under Judaic sovereignty there are fierce and hostile enemies still at the gates, well on their way to nuclear weapons. And, once again, at a time when the leaders of the Jewish folk are entrusted with a great and awesome responsibility, as more students learn Torah than at any time in Jewish history, will they, when the Third Jewish Commonwealth is at risk, abort their bad habits of disrespect towards each other? That is the lesson Lag B’Omer.


and teacher; wealth no longer being measured by aristocracy or assets, but by wisdom, learning, knowledge. Sensing an imminent victory, Roman’s Rufus released his terms of Jewish surrender: Jews could become fully protected Roman citizens in return for abandoning such “primitive superstitions” as circumcision, Shabbos, Torah study. A concerned rabbinate, their backgrounds as diverse as their opinions, met secretly in Lydda, just south of Tel Aviv on the Mediterranean coastline, to decide how to respond (the Haggada recalls this war-council). Rabbi Eliezer came from a wealthy farming family who was forced to eke out a living as a smith after his father disapproved of his studying Torah. Rabbi Joshua’s parents were poor, pious, and proud of their son’s Torah brilliance (as he worked making charcoal). Rabbi Tarfon was a priest from a middle class family, a celebrated teacher and a victim of enormous personal losses (all his sons died one after another). Rabbi Elazar ben Azarya, a descendent of Ezra, had yichus and wealth (his annual tithes were “12,000 calves!”). When ben Azaryah declares, “I am ‘like’ a man of 70,” we ask, why did he pick this number? Because it had been 70 years since the destruction of the First Temple and R’ Elazar was frustrated: “Hey, it’s been 70 years! When are we going to do something about these Romans?!” Some urged that the Edict of Rufus had to be defied in its entirety regardless of how bloody the consequences. Others disagreed: hadn’t G-d given the Torah so that “man should live by it”? Since Rabbi Akiva was the leading rav of the day, despite his embarrassment of endorsing the “fallen” Star of Kochba, his decision was final; physical survival he declared, but only within the Laws of Moses. R’ Akiva approved the (temporary) suspension of certain laws (Shabbos, kashrus, prayer) but only on condition that Torah study con-


Gluten Free Recipe Column by Mrs. Elaine Bodenheimer

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MAY 11, 2017

For questions or comments about Gluten Free Baking please email

Chocolate Walnut Cake kudos to

What You Will Need:


9 large eggs- separated 1 cup sugar, divided 5 oz. melted bittersweet chocolate ½ tsp. coffee granules 1 cup ground walnuts

1. Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. 2. In medium bowl of electric mixer, beat yolks on high speed together with ½ cup of sugar- until light yellow in color. Reduce mixer speed to low and pour in warm (not hot) chocolate and half of nuts. Mix until incorporated and set aside. 3. In a large bowl, with mixer on high, beat egg whites until soft peaks form. Reduce mixer to medium speed and incorporate remaining ½ cup of sugar. Increase mixer speed to high and beat until whites hold their shape but not until stiff or dry. Add a heaping cup of egg whites into chocolate mixture, then carefully fold chocolate mixture and remaining nuts into remaining egg whites. 4. Spoon batter into an ungreased 10- inch angel food cake pan with feet; carefully smooth top into an even layer. Bake until toothpick inserted into center of cake comes out clean- about 50-55 minutes. Remove from oven and turn pan upside down to cool. If you don’t have a footed pan, just place pan onto a wine bottle. When completely cool, loosen cake edges with a sharp knife and remove from pan. Enjoy!!

Recipies from:




by Renee Rousso Chernin

Bread Puddings are so easy and economical, and I can make them into any variation to please finicky eaters. The basis for bread pudding is chunks of bread in custard and baked until golden brown. Any kind of bread can be used, even gluten free. Whole wheat breads are best when mixed with at least 1/3 white flour breads. This keeps the pudding from becoming too heavy. Here’s the Basic Bread Pudding Recipe. Then some ideas for weeknight one dish meals and desserts good enough for Shabbos. Soon, you’ll be creating your own variations.

Basic Bread Pudding Recipe Preparation: 1. Spray a 9” or 9” x 13” baking dish with cooking spray or grease well. Preheat oven to 350°F. 2. In a very large bowl, whisk the eggs. Then whisk in liquid, use more liquid for hard crusty breads, less liquid for soft, fluffy breads. More liquid results in a creamier dish and less liquid will make the recipe hold together more like a quiche. Season egg mixture with salt, pepper fresh or dried herbs, spices, and/or extracts for sweet recipe. 3.  Stir in  the bread cubes, and soak in the egg mixture for 15 to 
20 minutes, pressing bread into liquid occasionally until liquid is absorbed. Add more bread as needed to absorb the liquid. 4. Fold in the fruit, nuts, vegetables, cheese or meat 5. Transfer mixture to prepared baking dish, and bake 40 minutes to 
1 hour, or until set in middle and lightly puffed. For sweet bread puddings, serve with optional toppings: caramel or chocolate, whipped cream or ice cream.

4 eggs 2-4 cups liquid: milk, cream, coconut milk, broth 4-6 cups bread cubes, cut into 1”-2” cubes 2-4 cups fruit, nuts or vegetables salt pepper and seasonings of choice

Bread Pudding Ideas Caramelized Onion •

Spinach & Cheese • Step 2: whisk

Reuben “UnSandwiched” •

Step 2: whisk in 2 tablespoons ketchup, 1 tablespoon mayonnaise, 1 finely chopped pickle and 2 teaspoons caraway seeds Step 4: 1 cup shredded pastrami or corned beef and ½ cup sauerkraut, well drained

New Orleans Bread Pudding •

Step 2: replace 1/2 cup of the liquid with pineapple juice. Whisk in 1 cup sugar, ½ teaspoon cinnamon, ½ teaspoon nutmeg and 1 teaspoon vanilla. Step 4: ½ cup cubed pineapple, ½ cup raisins. Serve with caramel sauce, caramel or vanilla ice cream and/or whipped topping

Chocolate Bread Pudding •

Step 2: replace ½ cup of the liquid with coffee flavored liqueur. Whisk in 1 cup brown sugar and ½ cup white sugar, ¼ cup cocoa powder, 1 tablespoon vanilla extract and 1 teaspoon cinnamon Step 4: 1 cup chocolate chips. Serve with coffee or vanilla ice cream and/or whipped topping

in 1 teaspoon basil, 1 teaspoon salt, ½ teaspoon pepper Step 4: 2 cups frozen spinach, thawed and drained well and 1 cup shredded cheese, cheddar, parmesan, or gouda or combination. Additional options: chopped sun-dried or fresh tomatoes, sautéed onions and/or mushrooms

Honey Orange Apricot Bread Pudding • Step 2: whisk in 1/4 cup

sugar and add 3 tablespoons honey, 1/4 cup orange juice, zest of 1 orange Step 4: 3/4 cup chopped dried apricots


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Step 4: caramelized onions (cook 3 large onions thinly sliced, 1 teaspoon sugar and 3 cloves garlic, chopped over medium heat until a rich golden brown). For dairy version, add 1 cup shredded cheese of choice.

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The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015



Why Did the Loophole Cross the Road? By Allan Rolnick

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MAY 11, 2017



We’ve just made it through our annual exercise in self-flagellation known as “tax filing season.” And whose fault is that? Don’t blame the IRS; blame the Congress that wrote the four million-odd words that make up the tax code. So it’s always refreshing to see someone inside that particular lion’s den take a critical look at what Congress has wrought. Jeff Flake is a freshman senator from Arizona who’s not interested in taking responsibility for the current system, which was written mainly by men who came of age when Packards and Studebakers filled the streets. This month, he issued a report called “Tax Rackets” that takes aim at so-called “outlandish loopholes” that taxpayers like alpaca farmers, magazine publishers, and golf course operators use to legally lower their bills. Flake shovels a steaming load of scorn on Section 45 credits for programs to create energy from “open loop biomass” — otherwise known as chicken “litter.” Chicken farmers in the DelMarVa peninsula, which includes Delaware, Maryland’s eastern shore, and the Virginia peninsula, produce 550,000 tons of droppings every year. They’ve been using it for fertilizer. But now the runoff is polluting Chesapeake Bay. So the area’s

representatives hatched legislation offering tax credits for selling the “litter” to power plants. The problem, says Flake, is that the initiative isn’t “everything it was cracked up to be.” There are already plenty of government subsidies for poop-to-power programs. (Flake’s words, not ours.) But nobody seems to want them. “Plans to build the power plants have ruffled the feath-

Flake also fires shots at the developers of American Dreamland, who are requesting tax-subsidized municipal bonds to finish a $5 billion mall in (where else) New Jersey. We’re not talking your usual soulless suburban shopping center here. Dreamland will include three million square feet of space, 30,000 parking spots, 450 shops and restaurants, an indoor waterpark, a roller coaster, a Ferris

Flake concludes that “subsidizing energy companies for producing poultry poop power is a bird brained idea that smells like a rotten egg.”

ers of the very taxpayers being forced to subsidize the energy they would produce. The squawking by citizens caused [one litter-to-energy producer] to scratch plans to build plants in Virginia, North Carolina, and Georgia.” Flake concludes that “subsidizing energy companies for producing poultry poop power is a bird brained idea that smells like a rotten egg.”

wheel, and an 800-foot indoor ski slope. Developers claim it will create 11,000 jobs and generate $1.5 billion in annual sales. What’s not to like? Except . . . two developers already dropped $2 billion on the boondoggle before slinking off in defeat. The third one wants a billion more in subsidized bonds to cross the finish line. It’s going up in the only county left in

America that still outlaws shopping on Sunday. And millions of shoppers are giving up entirely on mall traffic, mall crowds, and mall hype to order online. The latest developer boasts that “it’s going to be the No. 1 tourist destination, bar none, in the world.” (But he can’t actually believe that, can he?) Flake says the subsidies he’s exposed will cost taxpayers $50 billion over the next decade. The challenge from his perspective is getting Congress to do something about it. It’s been years since Congress could even walk and chew gum at the same time, and legislation today moves slower than geology. Good thing there’s a silver lining lurking deep inside this story. Sure, the current code is a mess. But at least we understand it. So you don’t have to pour your hard-earned dollars into poop-to-power programs to pay less. You just need a plan. Make sure you have one and see how much more you can take to the newest mall! Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 yea rs in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at







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