while we are waiting
Unfolding Projects group
Afghanistan and Australian women’s Artists’ Books
While we are waiting is a collection of writings from women in Afghanistan throughout 2022 and the visual responses from women artists in Australia, in the form of artists’ books.
Each of the 21 artists’ books is placed in a customised folder (Stonehenge 250gsm paper) together with introduction and colophon folders, in two archival solander boxes.
Mursal Nazari & Gali Weiss 2023 while we are waiting INTRODUCTION
cyanotype, text on acid free tracing paper
unbound artist’s book 42 cm x 30 cm
The Artists’ Books
Rosalind Atkins & Nazia
Courage Perseverance Bravery
Discrimination Oppression Inequality 2023 outer pages: linocut
artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.7 cm closed
After the re-establishment of the Taliban, Afghan women have once again been thrown into a cage. The Taliban, with their contemptible thoughts, announced all kinds of medieval laws against women and took away their rights to education and work as their first action. This means a far worse repetition of the black and bloody history of the first round of Taliban rule in the 90s. The Taliban have not at all changed, they are even more brutal than before. Their thoughts and desires have always been that women should be removed from society and have no role other than to give birth. They have always been against the education and advancement of women. And even today, girls are not allowed to attend school and instead of schools, they have built religious schools so that they can impose their evil thoughts on girls and women.
During a year of Taliban rule, Afghan women have gone back more than a century. All their rights have been taken away from them and they have suffered from all kinds of mental illness and misfortune in the corner of their house. During this year, not only schools were closed for girls, and hunger and famine were rampant in society, but also the Taliban easily allocated huge sums of money to build religious schools in cities and villages so that they could increase their circle of influence.
The situation of women in the countryside is very dire and inhumane. I have seen girls who were sold by their families. Underage marriages and forced marriages, beatings by the husband and the husband’s family, are considered normal. They are drowning in misery and suffering, and they struggle to survive. These inhuman pressures lead many women and girls to self-immolation and suicide. In addition to the rule of fundamentalism and the culture of patriarchy and the culture of exemption from the law, family violence is one of the reasons for the increase in suicide of women in Afghanistan.
Despite the fact that women are crushed under the pressure of tradition and fundamentalism and the ruling patriarchal culture and experience of a painful life, they have never stopped fighting for a better future. In the midst of a tsunami of more and more misery, they have never lost hope for salvation. The eyes of each of them glow with the love for life and freedom from captivity, and the desire to build a better future. Women’s hearts beat for education and study in the most remote parts of Afghanistan, which, like a remote island, is far from civilization, culture and human life. They have discovered through their experience and instinct that education and awareness will free them from the mire of poverty and misery, so they go towards accumulating knowledge with open arms. But unfortunately for Afghan women, this basic right has become an unattainable dream.
I spoke with girls in the villages. Without exception, all of them wanted to go to school and study and realized the value of literacy and awareness. It is the duty of every knowledgeable Afghan man and woman to shout out to the world about the enthusiasm and love that Afghan girls and women have for education and a better life. We should find practical ways to help Afghan women and girls without just wishing for girls’ success. Achieving such a goal requires a firm commitment and a huge amount of work from each and every one of us Afghan girls and women. We have no support except our arms. We understand that every effort and struggle in the world has not, and will not, remain unanswered. Courage, perseverance and risk-taking are the things that we need in order to succeed in anything. And Afghan women and girls have proven in their lives that they have all three characteristics. We believe that one day we will rise from the ruins and ashes, and by realizing our dreams, we will build a world free from discrimination, oppression and inequality, where women will play a constructive role in building a prosperous and free society as equals and side by side with men.
Unity and Struggle, 2023
relief print, acrylic on digital print, embroidery thread, hair
artist’s book, 43.8 cm x 29.7 cm closed
I am Shazia. I was born 23 years ago in one of the remote villages of Kunduz province. We lived in a difficult situation in the village. There was no school in our village. There were no jobs, only my father worked to feed our family of nine. If we got sick, we couldn’t go to the doctor because we didn’t have money to pay for medicine.
Many years ago, my family came to the centre of Kunduz from a remote village to find work. For some time, our situation was worse than at the village. Later, the work environment became better for my father and my brother, but again, we could only save ourselves from hunger and could not take care of other problems in our lives. Yet I was still very happy that at least my two sisters and I had a chance to go to school. I learned a lot at school. We had entered a different environment and everything I saw there was new and informative for me.
In our society, girls are born and grow up in deprivation and adversity, without having a dream and a chance to develop. Most are forced by their families to marry before the age of 18 and enter a dark and meaningless life, and they often die giving birth. But I had the opportunity to study and dream. My family was by my side and supported me under all circumstances. My family always encouraged me to achieve my dreams and I became more hopeful in life. Poverty has hardened us and with hard life it strengthened our endurance. I have fought with difficulties and have never surrendered to difficult situations, and never lost hope for a better future. It has been four years since I graduated from school, but I could not go to university. I want to go to university and progress in life and work hard to achieve my dreams. Having battled the odds for years, I am determined to make the most of the smallest opening and opportunity.
I consider education to be the most important factor and tool for fundamental change in the lives of Afghan girls and women. Afghan girls, who have been deprived of school and education for years, know the value and importance of education more than anyone else in the world. I cry for myself and millions of Afghan girls who have been deprived of education after the re-establishment of the Taliban. No woman, not even an illiterate one, is a supporter of the Taliban regime. All Afghan women are against the decisions of the Taliban. Women want to study and work and experience a happy life in a world full of peace that is free of war. This is the wish of all Afghan people, especially girls and women. We want to have democracy and freedom like other countries, a place where human rights and women’s rights will no longer be violated. We want to work and study to make a constructive contribution to building our ruined country. We want to take charge of our destiny both in the field of education and work and in the field of socio-political participation in society. And this goal is not possible without the unity and struggle of girls and women.
Shazia, 27 July 2022
Jennifer Kamp & Bahira
Jennifer Kamp & Bahira
The Taliban dictates 2023
fine art digital print
The Taliban dictates 2023 fine art digital print
artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.7 cm closed
artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.7 cm closed
Day by day restrictions on women are increasing in Afghanistan. The new order of the Taliban dictates that women should cover their faces in any situation. A lot of women were against this dictate and they protested but unfortunately no one heard their voices. Women have fallen victim to war and pressure. We call on the international community to stop the Taliban.
The level of education in Afghanistan is very poor. The lack of experienced teachers has caused some uneducated students to teach in the faculties. The absence of teachers has broken the morale of our students because in the current situation in Afghanistan, poverty and unemployment have increased and some students cannot afford to cover their expenses. A lot of talented girls cannot achieve their dreams.
The Taliban do not give women their rights, they think women are weak and incapable, and they have imposed many restrictions, including saying that men and women cannot work in the same areas, even in the university where I study. I do not have the right to speak freely, we do not even have the right to say a word to the media, and whatever problem I have, I cannot talk about it because I am not allowed to talk, and the new curriculum that is being created is only for the male class.
Restrictions for women are increasing every day. Cars that have women must have curtains. Girls cannot use any colour except black.
And still the biggest problems in the field of education are the lack of experienced professors and the lack of facilities in universities; lack of regular electricity, lack of electronic devices, and lack of access to the media to inform the world about the realities of our society.
Bahira, 18 June 2022
Di Ellis & Arzoo trembling hearts 2023 embroidery on organza stitched to watercolour painted paper, photographed and printed on rag paper. Pierced and cross-stitched with DMC thread
artist’s book, 40.5 cm x 27 cm closed
Today I am writing about the current situation in Kabul University. Yesterday, we were all studying in our classes when one of the faculty directors came and told us that the Taliban were coming to check the classes. He terrified everyone. Although we are currently living under the Taliban flag and many students and some employees who have just been hired at the university are members of the Taliban, yet still hearing that the Taliban had entered the university and were checking classrooms, terrified everyone.
All our fear and panic was renewed and we all looked at the professor with innocent looks. Later, at the request of the Taliban group, with trembling hearts and hands we all went into the university hall, knowing there was little chance of us returning alive. Everyone was filled with fear, and we all waited for the speech to begin with the same fear that we had and with the same fear that there may be suicide in the hall.
After a few moments, a group of armed people, all wearing a similar turban and limp shirt [identifying them as Taliban], entered the hall and the colour drained from the faces of the students.
From all our hearts we were sending thousands of curses to them. We were sorry for the situation of ourselves and our country which has fallen into the hands of such an ignorant group. They started the speech and we unavoidably had to listen to their ridiculous words. Unfortunately, most of the speeches of the Taliban representative addressed Afghan women like this: A woman’s place is in the home and the only duty of a woman is to take care of children and maintain the house of a man; a woman is only related to her husband and her brother and father.
This Talib speaker emphasized a lot on women’s hijab and covering, although we were all present with completely black hijabs that covered our whole bodies. When I think of the thoughts of this ignorant group about women, I become disappointed and I know that their old thoughts cannot change our ideas. On the contrary, I decided to study more after hearing the words of Taliban representative and I started to try harder than before.
I know that my way is not only about studying to become a doctor, but to fight against these old thinkers and ignorant group. After almost 40 minutes of useless and pointless speeches their talks ended and they finally left the university, and because the university teaching time was over I returned home. Every time I think about their words, I feel a sense of despair. It means that we are in a country where being a woman is a crime and an extremist group like the Taliban is leading my country. In any case, in the end, I wish for peace and tranquility, and most importantly, I wish for a bright tomorrow and a free Afghanistan.
Arzoo, 26 April 2022
Silvi Glattauer & Arzoo untitled 2023
photopolymer photogravure on Somerset Velvet 300 gsm
artist’s book, 42 cm x 30.3 cm closed
Two weeks ago was Eid al-Adha in Afghanistan, Eid in which all Muslims sacrifice animals such as sheep, cows and goats for the sake of God and celebrate it in a big way. I took the opportunity to go home to spend a few days happily with my family under the excuse of Eid. When I arrived in Takhar, I was faced with the suffocating and enclosed atmosphere of the city, the Taliban’s restrictions greater in Takhar than Kabul, and because there was no full media coverage, they could easily opress the suffering people of Takhar. The next day, my sister and I decided to go to the market and prepare new clothes and essential items for Eid. We both wore long black hijabs with black veils and went to the market. When we arrived at the market, everyone was enthusiastically busy shopping for Eid, and we entered the shops to buy the things we wanted. We were in the process of shopping when suddenly I heard a voice; Stop sister! When I heard this, my heart skipped a beat and I was worried that we might be the ones being addressed by this sentence. I turned around and saw some Taliban people pointing at us and continuing their words, saying you have violated the laws of Islam and are a shame to society. Seeing the terrible looks of the local people and hearing rude words in front of everyone was unbearable. We were shaking all over like a willow tree and I thought this was the last moment of our lives. I was worried about my sister, whose eyes were full of tears and she had a hard time controlling herself. We were very scared and the threatening sentences of the Taliban hit my heart like bullets one after the other, and I stopped breathing. If we see you again without a burqa, we will punish you according to the laws of the Islamic Emirates. After this threat, the Taliban went away from us and our trapped souls were released again and we thanked God for saving us. We hurriedly left the market so as not to face these cannibals again. We returned home with confused faces and confused thoughts, and my mother was very concerned when she saw our state and asked: What happened? Why have you lost all your colour? We decided not to tell the family anything about our experience on that day, because recounting that terrible incident would bring nothing but distress. I told my mother, take it easy, nothing special happened, we were just afraid of the Taliban with their long hair and weapons. I finished my words and entered my room. That night, we looked at each other with disappointed faces, and there was silence everywhere until my sister Tamana said: Arzoo, you are the luckiest among us to be able to continue to live and study in Kabul. Kabul is not as restrictive as here in Takhar. Here, we can’t even go outside our home. Now you saw with your own eyes what kind of problems and wild thoughts we are facing. With each word, tears flowed down my sister’s cheeks and I cried along with her, which is difficult for me to even express that feeling. This is how we started the first night of Eid, with tears and breathlessness. After six days of leave, I travelled with my uncle and returned to Kabul. Although two weeks have passed since that sad event, every time I review the memory of it, my heart trembles and misery fills my entire being. I am very worried for myself, my sisters and all Afghan women.
Arzoo, 26 July 2022
Abbra Kotlarczyk & Khadija
Too Tough 2023
earth impregnated and perforated papers, tailor’s chalk, watercolour and rice glue
artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.5 cm closed
The fear and hope of a painter under the rule of the Taliban.
With the fall of Kabul to the Taliban, all our plans and dreams were ruined. In the first days of the arrival of the Taliban in Kabul, many revenge killings were carried out, and in particular, women who were active in the fields of civil society, human rights, women’s rights, and girls’ education were kidnapped and killed. Women were denied the right to study and work. Any kind of art, music, and cinema activities were banned. After a week, several paintings on our wall were removed by the Taliban in Kabul. The day after the arrival of the Taliban, news spread that the Taliban had started house-to-house attacks, and I quickly burned all my paintings and drawings, and a part of me was burned together with them. My fear increased after one of the Taliban told my father in Kunduz that we know what your daughter is doing and where she is hiding. I quickly changed my place to Kabul and my family also moved from Kunduz to another province.
Today, my family and I and dozens of other artists are in danger because of our activities and have to either run away or hide. Living night and day under the suffocating pressure of fear and stress had turned my life into a burning hell. But fortunately, in early September 2021, AFCECO created a number of safe houses in Kabul, and I was immediately accepted into one of them.
When I wake up in the morning, I repeat this sentence: I am too tough for the pressure of the Taliban to destroy me.
The enmity of the Taliban towards artists, images, and paintings shows their fear of the function and role of art in society. When I heard that the Taliban destroyed our paintings in their first act, my faith in myself, and the value I had for my artworks, increased several times. I felt proud in front of this action of the Taliban. Because my paintings scared the Taliban. In the first days of Taliban rule, Afghan women and girls stood against the Taliban with empty hands and protested against this anti-women and extremist regime.
After three months of the rule of the religious authoritarian regime in Afghanistan, poverty and hunger have reached their peak. The health and economic system are on the verge of collapse. People have no bread to eat and have to sell their children. The killing of women has increased unprecedentedly. The girls are disappointed and suffer from mental illness. With each passing day, more children suffer from malnutrition and hundreds of other painful events...
My first attempt is to be able to survive in order to depict the visions and sufferings of Afghan women in my paintings in the future. I want to live to bring the message and dreams of a 19-year-old girl and her contemporaries who survived the war, poverty, and problems and fought for their rights, to the people of the world. Afghan women are too strong to give up their rights and struggle under the Stone Age laws of the Taliban. Afghan women have nothing to lose. Even if the world leaves us alone, we will continue to fight for our freedom and rights in different ways, and we believe that Afghan women and girls will win in the end.
Written by Khadija on 5 December 2021 and sent to Australia on 28 October 2022
Deanna Hitti & Arzoo
I wanted to share my feelings with you today
2023
6 sided cyanotype and 2 colour screen print
artist’s book, 30 cm x 42.5 cm closed
I wanted to share my feelings with you today. Today is August 15, which is the day of the fall of my country, Afghanistan. Today, it has been exactly one year that my country has been in the hands of the ignorant traitors. It has been exactly one year that the girls have been kept away from school and their studies. It has been one year that a black cloud has been moving over my country. I really don’t know what to write and what to say and where to say it, for you!
When I realized today that the Taliban regime was one year old, I remembered the day when I was in university, and I got the news that Kabul had fallen, and all the students were rushing to their homes. At that time, I was in the dormitory and I didn’t know where to go and what to do, so I had no choice but to cry and I called my aunt who was in Kabul and she took me to her house.
I mean, I don’t want to upset you by remembering last year, but when today I see these ignorant people celebrating the one-year anniversary of their rule and beating their feet, my heart really hurts, and I don’t know how long these days of victory will be celebrated – the victory that was accompanied by the defeat and bloodshed of my homeland. How long do we have to endure these people, who do not know how to dress up, nor how to treat people? They look like zombies and no one knows when they will attack us.
Well, I’m not exaggerating, but when I saw today’s date, my heart was on fire and my throat was full because in this past year, dozens of families have been mourning, masses of families are away from their loved ones and dozens of other families are away from their education. It hurts to remember this.
The good thing that has happened to me this year is to get to know you through dear Mursal, and I have returned to university and that is because of your blessing. I haven’t seen any other good things apart from this.
In the end, thank you again for creating a way for me to share my pain with you and to tell you easily what my heart feels, and by saying these words, my pain really eases.
Hoping for the day when my country will win and my people will be free.
Arzoo, 15 August 2022
Tess Edwards & Shazia Zainab 2023
acrylic and watercolour paint and oil pastel
over a digital image taken from a French prayerbook
artist’s book, 42 cm x 30.5 cm closed
Zainab was born into a large, poor family, the eldest child of a family of six. She was of medium height, with a thin body, white skin, big eyes and brown hair. Zainab had a lot of respect for the elderly and loved children a lot. She was a strong, courageous and hard-working girl, treating those around her gently and kindly. She loved to study but her family’s religious beliefs prevented her from continuing her schooling.
Zainab lost her father when she was eight years old. Her sister was four and her brother was two. Her grandmother raised the three children with many difficulties and did not expect that her daughter-in-law would experience the same fate as herself. They did not have another man in the house to take responsibility for them.
Zainab was a smart and intelligent girl. She was small, but she understood everything well. Like hundreds of thousands of orphaned and disabled Afghan children, Zainab also tasted the bitterness of suffering, adversity and a fatherless life in her childhood. She went to school regularly. Her sad appearance hurt the hearts of the people in the village. She had a problem with a headache, but she had no one to take care of her. When she came home from school, there was nothing to fill her stomach and she did not see anyone in the house who had a fresh spirit. She could not enjoy the outside environment, so when she came home, when she saw the state of the house, she got angry but did not say anything to her mother, lest she got upset. Most nights they slept on an empty stomach.
Several months passed with the same problems. Zainab reached a state where her mind and little heart could no longer bear all the suffering and pain. One night when she slept in hunger, her condition deteriorated by the morning and she was very weak. The midwife took her to the hospital but unfortunately, her frail body could not bear any more pain and she spent her last moments at the hospital as her condition was very serious. Her grandmother and her pained mother, who had never seen a happy day, could no longer bear the loss of Zainab. Zainab suffered a stroke and died at the age of 16 in hospital. She was freed from the painful prison of life forever.
After the death of Zainab, her grandmother lost her mind. She remembers Zainab every moment and continuously sheds tears. Zainab’s mother cries every day. Zainab’s death was unbearable for her family.
Zainab and I lived in the same village. We were neighbours. It was very difficult for me to see the painful moments of Zainab’s life. I can never forget her agreeable face with those innocent looks. Writing the story of Zainab’s life is very painful for me. In Afghanistan, we witness such unfortunate events every year, every month and every day.
Shazia, 18 September 2022
Barbara Kameniar & Gawhar manifesto 2023
digital fine art print
artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.5 cm closed
How can we develop a country? First, unity is important for the development of a country because we know that a family cannot develop without unity. Similarly, a country cannot develop without unity.
The government has high laws to improve the condition of a country because it has the dignity of the backbone of a country. A country cannot develop without a good government.
In fact, we have many governments in the world, but here the political regime is more important than the government. For example, Afghanistan with a good government and an army of 300,000 fell against the Taliban with an army of 50,000. The reason for this bitter defeat is the lack of proper governance.
In addition, knowledge is very important in the development and progress of a country because we know that illiterate people cannot make a country progress.
Actually, we need literacy to develop as a country. In the Holy Quran it asks: Are those who know the same as those who do not know?
In short, as we know, education is the greatest weapon against an enemy.
Therefore, the young generation is the backbone of a society. Indeed, the development of a country completely belongs to the young generation, so every government should pay more attention to the education and training of the young generation. The young generation is the great wealth of a country for its development.
22 March 2022
Heather Shimmen & Nazia
On the Moon 2023
linocut, mono print, solvent transfer, stencil and ink
artist’s book, 42.4 cm x 30 cm closed
In the harsh environment, no matter how long people live in suffering, this suffering spreads to the whole world and the environment. In the human environment full of human suffering, animals, birds and living creatures will not be without that human suffering. I remember many years when the sound of guns, explosions, and airplanes were not heard in our village, the trees were a safe place for birds to mate, and their loud noise indicated a fruitful life. But with the intensification of the war, all the birds disappeared at once. I don’t understand where they went.
In this poem, the story of a girl has been chosen as an example of the miserable living conditions of Afghan girls and women. Wherever the girl is mentioned, it refers both to the life of a girl and to all girls. What is said about that girl in the poem applies to the conditions of all Afghan girls and women. For this reason, when the poet wishes in the first line of the third last verse, that the girl would deny the law of the jungle ruling in the society and decide her own destiny, in the second line she repeats her wish for all girls and women. There are countless girls and women who suffer the same fate.
Image on the Moon
I tell you the story of a night,
A heartrending night,
And from the bird on the branch of an orange tree
That sings the agony of humans with a hoarse voice.
My heart sinks down
When I think of people, Their wounds
Their untold stories
The secret treasures of their hearts, That in a dark night
Howl monstrously from the burning pain of their soul.
Midnight
I look at the reflection of moving shadows on the moon,
The girl wakes up from the cold arms of the old man,
A bubble of grief bursts in her throat.
Pearls of tears like Mona Lisa’s smile shine on her pale cheeks.
There’s a ditch or a half-open window
That has opened its mouth into the depths of the night, I look at it from a distance.
Maybe the girl breathes from the window of her grave.
The night is coloured by the dark fate of the girl.
The cruel night, coloured by the darkness of the girl’s fate
Casts a shadow over her heart.
I hear the roar of wind knocking on her window, Aware of its presence in the frozen body of the girl Who has given her warmth to the cold walls of the house.
The icy wind that passes through the forest, And the sharp fall of yellow leaves, Herald the beginning of a brutal winter.
Maybe one day
The surging Spring wind
On the other side of the window
Will shake the thin wall of the girl’s heart with joy…
I look at the sad image of the girl that has fallen on the moon.
She might say, “How miserable am I. Why should
The cold arms of the old man, Endless tears, Long brutal winter, Be my share of this world? How unlucky am I!”
My heart wants the girl to break the law of the jungle,
The law that wants a woman to be the doll behind a window, And her hair deprived of the Spring breeze.
My heart wants to draw a line on her miserable destiny, And pray to the law of grass, soil and rain
Which is life and prosperity.
Oh!
How I want the radiance of the sun, That shines on the cold forehead of the old man, To glow inside the girl’s heart!
Nazia, 14 December 2022
Stephanie Mortlock & Diyana
In any shape or colour we were compelled to remain 2023 watercolour, graphite
artist’s book, 42.4 cm x 29.7 cm closed
Many challenges and obstacles stand in my way, but I do not see my challenges and obstacles as limiting and destructive, because I believe that problems have come to test our capabilities and I never want to underestimate them. I believe hope is more than hope (I wish to hope beyond hope), meaning that I am thinking positively and I am hopeful.
I do not give up on my dreams and I do not want to lose them.
It’s really hard to wait, but I find consolation when I hear that good people are working and trying to better our situation.
And it depends on the attitude of people.
I believe that this waiting will have a happy ending, so I wait with love and patience.
Being a woman is painful!
We have experienced similar pain in different lives
Wherever we journeyed there was pain
Whatever we heard was lament Those sorrowful images have been ingrained into our eyes forever We are detached from ourselves and others
We were naive
Naive, or so I say
We had no choice
Forced to change destiny
Forced to express destiny
Forced to fight destiny
In any shape or colour we were compelled to remain And finally we conceded
This wretched destiny
Our pain was gruelling for our age
I cannot forget having no other way than grief and sorrow
Diyana, 14 February 2022
Marian Crawford & Gurdaafarid
My Daughter 2023
relief print, letterpress
artist’s book, 42.5 x 30 cm open
A story that tells of the stressful times for thousands of women and girls like Gurdafaarid who have been forced to live in the land of torture, tyranny and hell, struggling for their human rights against the bloodthirsty and misogynist people known as Taliban, while following the motto “bread-work-freedom”.
I am Gurdafaarid. My name is derived from Ferdowsi’s Shahnameh [“Book of Kings”, a long epic poem written by the Persian poet Ferdowsi]. Gurdafaarid is a heroine and warrior woman in the Shahnameh. My family chose this name for me so that I too will be a brave warrior woman in the future. But they were unaware of my unforeseeable fate, destined to a difficult and dangerous life.
A village girl who had begun to grow thousands of dreams in her heart but now knows well that to realise her aspirations at such a tumultuous time is fruitless, and she must pay a heavy price for those high desires.
However, I never gave up. My only supporter was my old and suffering mother who had buried all the sadness of life in her heart; a mother who had endured thousands of experiences of pain and violence. She would always say to me, “My daughter! Nothing will help you in your life but your pen and your literacy.” This sentence was engraved into my mind. My mother is the role model who paved the path I am on today.
After continuous efforts, I succeeded in my favourite field – philosophy and sociology. I was still alone and had no support other than my mother. Not only did people not support me, they sneered at me, saying that this field is not useful, especially for girls. Yet I loved my field. Although I could capture one of my big wishes, but so far lots of my wishes are suppressed. Because in the religious and traditional society of Afghanistan, women and girls are taboo and there are many limitations for them.
I could not be a musician, a painter, or any other artist, because I am a girl. My mind is full of repressed and unhappy memories of impossible and lost dreams that have been shed over time. It is as if I have become depressed about the ashes that have been soiled and aspirations that have vanished.
Although the fading away of my beautiful dreams was bothering me, and I was eating myself from the inside, I was hoping for good days to work, and to try to make my other dreams come true. Then everything turned upside down overnight. The country disintegrated and everything, once again and more terribly, was destroyed.
I lost all my hopes and wishes.
With the coming of the Talban, torture and violence have increased, and people have been deprived from study and education, leading society to ignorance and darkness. Again, I hoped I would be fighting for my rights, but it has not been easy. It is not easy to fight this illiterate and bloodthirsty group.
All the Gurdafaarids of this land are waiting for another sun to rise again. We are waiting for a new beginning. We will continue to fight with the motto of “bread, work and freedom” and we will never give up. I want to raise the voice of justice, equality and freedom on behalf of all girls of my generation whose destiny is threatened. We want our human and natural rights, and we will not give up any struggle for it. We will continue to fight in the hope of brighter days, freedom and justice.
We have our own destiny. We will create it ourselves, and we will not leave it at any cost to go back to the dark past.
Gurdafaarid 28 January 2022
Ann Cunningham & Shahnaz untitled 2023
eco dyed paper, twining and stitching
artist’s book, 42 x 30 cm closed
This is the story of the life of an Afghan girl refugee who grew up with many problems in Afghanistan and achieved some of her dreams. And now she is telling her story.
This girl came from a well-educated family, but unfortunately, she grew up in a country that was always in war, corruption, and all kinds of oppression, which hindered her goals and dreams.
Other people who live in this country are faced with the same hardships of insecurity, ignorance, poverty, but girls and women are being harmed more. This is because in Afghanistan, women and girls are looked at as tools.
The Afghan girl who went to school used to study with difficulties because in Afghanistan, women and girls were not allowed to study or work outside the home. In Afghanistan, women can work only as carers and housewives with tasks they are expected to do. One day, a young girl was killed at the Afghan girl’s school in a suicide attack. After that, the Afghan girl was afraid that she too would die in the same way. But when she finished school, she entered university and started studying there. She felt happy that she could become a person useful to her family and her country.
In the year 1400 [2021], when a wild group known as Daesh or Taliban took over the government of Afghanistan, she could not continue her education. Because Afghanistan had lost its freedom, because the living conditions for all the people living in Afghanistan had become more difficult than before, for this reason, Afghanistan had fallen into the hands of the brutal and bloodthirsty Taliban. Before then, that girl lived very happily and closely with her family. But after that, this big family got separated and could not live together like before because Afghanistan was not safe and after that, this girl migrated to Pakistan with her mother, father, sister and brother.
When she was on her journey to Pakistan, the border closed down, and they faced a lot of difficulty with the ugly behavior of the Taliban and the border police of Pakistan because they knew she was a foreigner. When the Afghan daughter entered Pakistan she faced many difficulties. She could not study or continue her education or perform any duties because she did not have any documents and she was not legally registered in that country. This girl was living in a foreign country and was afraid that the Pakistan government would deport her.
This Afghan girl does not have any hope that she will return to her homeland, Afghanistan, to live like before when she was a student and attending regular classes in her university. Nor does she believe that the treacherous leaders will not return to the battlefield in the future. Therefore, the world of despair and the unclear future of her life continue night and day in the world of migration.
Shahnaz, 11 April 2022
Megan Stone & Khajesta
The sky that connects us all 2023-24 fine art digital print
artist’s book, 42 x 29.7 cm closed
My name is Khojesta, I am from Afghanistan.
Since my childhood, I have been greatly interested in journalism. I have read many books to be successful in the field I want to study. The only good feeling in my life is studying. I have one hope in life, that I can study and not fall victim to the customs and traditions that exist in our family and society.
In Afghanistan, most women cannot do anything for themselves. Here, women must always be dependent on their family’s decisions. Life in Afghanistan is very difficult for women. My only desire is to study so that I can be an intellectual and a role model for others. As Afghanistan’s new government came to power, most female journalists were injured, and unfortunately they lost their freedom. But the only goal I have in life is to study, and I will always continue to study, so that one day I will be able to report the facts to people like a successful reporter.
Anisa Shahid is a successful journalist broadcaster and an example of Afghanistan’s talent. I would like to be as successful as this lady. I always want to work bravely and intelligently. I want to properly use the talent that God has given me to serve all poor and helpless people.
One group of victims of the war in Afghanistan are journalists who were hunted down for targeted killings. But there is no one to hear them. I want to be their voice. I want to work in the field of Journalism in order to serve my country like these brave journalists. They are the ones who stood up against oppression and tyranny. They always told the truth and I want to continue the path of these heroes and be the voice of these heroes, to serve my country like they did. I want to break the injustices that exist. Journalism is my only wish and my only goal is to continue my education to build a good future for my orphaned siblings and the helpless people of my country.
Khojesta, 14 February 2022
Karena Goldfinch & Tamana untitled 2023
photopolymer photogravure tryptich created from a botanical print using Ginkgo Biloba and Allocasuarina Verticillata leaves
artist’s book, 42 cm x 30 cm closed
Today is my birthday. I turned 18 today and started a new year of my life. In the past years, when my birthday was approaching, I was planning what to do for the new year and I was excited. But unfortunately, this year when I reached my legal age, I was very disappointed about my cold and dark future, about what will happen.
I will graduate from school in two months.
Two months later, I will get the certificate of graduation from my school. Without going to school, I cannot express my feelings to you at all. What pain there is, is in my heart.
Today, on my birthday, I wish that I could study properly at school. I wish that I could study in a place far away from the sound of war. I want to continue my studies in a peaceful and calm place, away from the wild Taliban. I hope that my dream of becoming a doctor will not remain a dream and I will achieve my dream of becoming a successful doctor.
Tamana, 10 September 2022
Tracey Avery & Tamana untitled 2023 solvent transfer artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.5 cm closed
Today, August 15th, was registered in the country’s constitution by the Taliban as Afghanistan’s Independence Day and our legal independence, which was August 27th, was declared null and void by the Taliban. Today, the black history of my country is one year old. The Taliban are celebrating this day with jubilation. While it has been a year since Afghan girls did not go to school, it has been a year since the Afghan people have lost their smiles, it has been a year since the Afghan people started searching for a bite of bread for their children, and for a year, the Afghan people have been living their lives full of pain and sorrow. Today I am very sad and today I remember the awful memories of how the Taliban came for the first time and how they changed our lives in one go and tears are flowing from my eyes. All the time in my mind there are images of people covered in blood everywhere on the roads. My mental state is really bad today. I can’t control myself at all, and with tears in my eyes, I pray for the soldiers who fought until the last drop of blood so that these savages wouldn’t occupy the country. May their souls rest in peace. Today, the situation of all the people of Afghanistan is sad and they remember bad and awful, heartbreaking incidents and shed tears.
While the people of Afghanistan are sad, the Taliban are very happy today and are dancing and stomping their feet. This is a country whose government is happy and whose people are sad.
Tamana, 15 August 2022
Gali Weiss & Sahar
Safe Houses 2023
video stills, digital fine art print
artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.8 cm closed
Before the fall of Kabul to the Taliban, a year had passed since I graduated from dentistry, and due to the spread of Covid-19, I had not been able to enter practical work in my field. With the end of the quarantine I was preparing to work in one of the clinics in Kabul when the misogynistic and fundamentalist Taliban came to power again on August 15, 2021, and my dreams were destroyed.
Having completed my school days, and then six years of university with many difficulties and in the midst of war, insecurity and suicides, I was more determined than ever to work in one of the clinics, preferably in one of the remote areas of Afghanistan. Or maybe I would build a clinic.
In the traditional society of Afghanistan, men of the family prefer not to take women to see male doctors in the presence of female doctors. Since there are no female doctors in all regions, this issue has caused the health problems of women in remote areas to be addressed less and less. Considering this fact, as a doctor, I could play a special role in solving women’s health problems, and this made me very happy and motivated me over the years not to give in to difficult situations and problems in life. But the rule of the Taliban again turned this beautiful dream into a terrible nightmare for me.
The resurgence of the Taliban gave me, and millions of Afghan women and girls, a huge shock. Widespread despair, indecision, fear, terror, hunger and unemployment engulfed the entire society, and women were the first victims.
I grew up in one of AFCECO’s orphanages. AFCECO is the Afghan Child Education and Care Organisation. As a safe place during the years of my past life, it provided all the necessary facilities and conditions to continue my education so that I could stand on my own two feet and progress as an educated and active member of Afghan society. The presence of Taliban fighters meant the closure of this lively center of education and love. This bothered me more than anything else. The Taliban immediately closed girls’ schools and orphanages, and safe houses for women were closed all over Afghanistan. Women lost their jobs in both government and nongovernment offices within one day.
I could not sleep. Fear and stress were all over me. Thinking about the unknown future for the students of AFCECO and for myself was killing me. With the arrival of Taliban fighters, I quickly called one of my friends who worked in the management team of AFCECO. They were evacuating the building and he told me that they had sent all the students home. I felt a little relieved.
Less than a week after the Taliban took over, they began house-to-house searches, which had followed a wave of terror. The unsettling question was running through my mind; what would happen if the girls who played music at AFCECO and who were members of the Zohra Orchestra were identified and caught by the Taliban during the searches? What would happen to them?
Fortunately, this did not happen. The girls were hiding in one of the houses. At the beginning of September, I learnt from a phone call with one of my friends that the mental condition of the female musicians who were told to go to their homes was dire. Seeing pictures of Taliban fighters on social media that showed them breaking musical instruments of the National Music Institute of Afghanistan, and the shooting by Taliban fighters of a local singer in one of the northern provinces of the country, made the situation more complicated.
The crushing pressure the girls endured in those days is beyond imagination. The girls’ faces were familiar to everyone, so they could not return to their homes because they would soon be identified. They had to be kept away from the hands of the Taliban with all the difficulties and risks.
My husband and I were prepared to accept any kind of risk to hide the three musicians and another AFCECO girl in our house. I received a call from my friends who were in leadership positions of AFCECO, asking me if these girls could stay with us in our house for a while. I explained to them that we were already ready to accept them.
Our house was not in a good position in terms of security. My husband found another house and we immediately moved there with the three musicians and a girl artist, a student from AFCECO. This is how AFCECO’s first safe house was created.
I gave them spirit and hope, kept them busy with activities and fulfilled their needs. I could not sleep at night.
In the middle of the night, I would ask my husband; what if a Taliban enters the house and asks, why are these girls who are not your relatives, here under the same roof?
What will be our answer?
What will be the attitude of the Taliban?
By analyzing the situation and our conditions, we created a few more safe houses for those girls of AFCECO who were most in need. Before moving the girls into homes, I first set up a team of people who worked in detail on two major issues: safety and education.
Immediately, one of our team, whose duty was to check the security of the houses, started looking for other houses that would be suitable in terms of security, located far from the Taliban’s gunfire, and where the students’ movements in and out of the house would not be questioned by neighbours and surrounding people. I warned all the girls almost every day to pay attention to our guidance on security issues, not to communicate with the neighbors and not to share any kind of information with any stranger, not to make a mistake if the Taliban came to the house, and to keep calm. After the transfer of the students from provinces to AFCECO safe houses, we divided them into groups of six or seven for their new homes.
A month or two into the Taliban rule, things seemed calmer, but not for me and the new AFCECO team. We were still under intense mental pressure to fix things and plan for the future. The girl musicians who flew to safety in Portugal a few months later had been at my house. My husband and I had tried to reduce their psychological pressure by creating different programs for them. We introduced the girls as my sisters so that the neighbors would not suspect. According to Islamic beliefs young girls living in the house of a person with whom they have no family relationship is unacceptable, not only to the Taliban but also to the general public in Afghanistan. So we had to tell the neighbors that these girls were my sisters.
Based on our security protocols, we told the girls not to go out except in exceptional circumstances. We bought burqas for them, and whenever they wanted to go out they had to cover themselves completely and wear masks. As I myself needed guidance and
support due to psychological pressure and fear, I tried to read psychology books to learn what kind of behavior and speech is appropriate with girls in such difficult situations.
We worked on an educational plan. For the first few months, in addition to accessing online English courses, we hired home teachers for girl students up to sixth grade, as well as for those above sixth grade who had been banned from their schools.
Just six months ago, the Taliban started a house-tohouse search for the second time. It was terrifying for us all. Nothing could be done. We took all the necessary precautions and told the girls not to lose their composure so as not to be suspicious. The search passed without incident.
After the Taliban came into ruling power, women were the first group to stand up against their misogynistic decrees by starting protests and demonstrations, which were severely suppressed. In several cases, the Taliban raided many houses and arrested and detained girls and women, then released them after torture.
My fear was that if a mistake were made by one of the girls or the house managers, the neighbours would report us to the Taliban. If the Taliban entered the houses for any reason and were suspicious, they could have accused the safe houses of AFCECO of being gathering centers for women activists and would have arrested us. Although we encouraged the girls that nothing would happen if they followed the security protocols, I was crumbling under the pressure of stress. Fortunately, no incidents took place.
With the committed and dedicated team of AFCECO in Kabul, I was able to organize AFCECO after the Taliban takeover in the form of safe houses, despite the dangers. All the people involved in this did a truly excellent job for our AFCECO girls to continue their education. Last year changed my life. During the past year, alongside anxiety and fear, I felt proud because I was able to take a role in organizing the training program for AFCECO girls.
Sahar, 6 November 2022
The Zohra Orchestra is the first all-female orchestra of Afghanistan, founded in 2015 by the National Music Institute of Afghanistan.
Christine Willcocks & Bahira untitled 2023 monoprint, solar etching, graphite
artist’s book, 41.8 cm x 28.6 cm closed
Currently, Afghan women have a very difficult life under the Taliban’s regime. The Taliban have taken away all human rights from women and girls. All the human rights that Islam has given to women and girls, the Taliban have taken away from them.
In Khost province (south east of Afghanistan), when girls and women leave their house to study or work they are always threatened by the Taliban. Even when we are in the car, we cannot take off our hijab or burqa.
The Taliban has all the power but they don’t use it in the right way. Even if they are married and have children, they force teenage girls from poor families to marry them. Girls in Afghanistan are usually the first victims of wrong doings because of the customs and culture in Afghanistan.
There was a big meeting about women’s hijab in Khost province. Many women and girls were invited to the meeting, but no one had the right to say anything. Before the event they informed us that no one has the right to ask any questions or to make a short speech. They have given us the right to study, but not the right to work and speak.
In their speeches, the Taliban said that we can be the carers of our family but they never said that we can be the administrators or managers of an organization. This means that even when women in Afghanistan have education, they must still remain at home as housekeepers.
The only thing that we requested from them was to reopen girls’ schools but they said nothing, ignoring the question. They kept saying, “If you do anything wrong, the next generation will be affected and they won’t be able to go to university.”
Catherine Pilgrim & Mahbouba untitled 2023 lithograph artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.7 cm closed
With the coming of the Taliban, Afghanistan has changed to a prison for women. Every second people are tortured mentally and physically by the Taliban. This time they are seriously focused on women’s clothing. They announced that all women must wear the Islamic Burqa and totally cover their face. Before this, we also wore the Islamic Hijab but instead of covering our face with a black scarf, we used to wear facemasks. But now the Taliban don’t allow women and girls to just cover their face with facemasks.
Recently, they made a checkpoint on the highway to our university, and they are looking for girls who are not following their new rules. A few days ago, they stopped girls who were not wearing a Burqa from going to their university. All the girls went back home but one girl stood against them and attacked a Taliban and finally took his gun. Very soon after, lots of other Taliban men came and we left the area and went home, and we don’t know what happened to that girl. Now we are continuing going to school with Islamic Burqa.
On March 10, 2022, in the Rustaq District of Takhar Province, the Taliban killed a young man as he was sitting in a restaurant with his partner. They killed him because he had invited his partner to a restaurant for a meal. They also made lots of other rules, like increasing Islamic subjects at universities; all the teachers must wear traditional clothes and male teachers must have long beards. No teacher is allowed to enter the university without traditional clothes and a long beard.
With all these problems we are continuing our studies and I hope one day I will be able to serve other women and girls who are denied education, and help them to acquire knowledge. I wish I could serve my country and my people, and I will continue my struggle until Afghanistan gets its freedom and women and girls will be free and we will see smiles across the lips of Afghan women and children again.
Mahbouba, 18 May 2022
Life in a Dream 2023
digital print of collaged work, eco print with collage and pencil
artist’s book, 42 cm x 29.6 cm closed
Nowadays my life is like a bird with broken wings! Hunters are everywhere with their guns. They try to hunt the bird, and I, like the bird, try to rescue my life and find paths of flight.
The bird, which had traveled several miles, was looking for the meadow that it had always had in its mind. Unfortunately, my wishes are far away from me. The savages, with their rough and horrible faces, have kept me in check.
I am living under barbarians. In the valley where I am, everyone is desperate to survive. I was always flying like a bird in the desert, but today I am imprisoned because I don’t have even seeds for life.
But my dreams are still alive! The reason I am alive and breathing is that my dreams keep me alive, even though the situation is very bad. I am still searching for a way to fly and arrive at green grass, where all the birds are singing and filling every branch of the trees. Where the birds do not feel threatened by the wild hunter, where they feel safe. I want to build a nest.
Like other birds in the world I also like my freedom and want to fly everywhere. Being free is everyone’s right. I really want to continue the rest of my life in a safe place where there is no bomb, no gun, no orphan’s cry and no terrorist. It is difficult each time to see tears in my mother’s eyes, and in the eyes of all mothers living in my homeland. I believe that this dark situation will be gone soon as this proverb states: Behind every dark cloud, the sun shines. I am looking for the sun that shines.
Shukria, 28 January 2022
Tanya Ngerengere & Tahira
My dream – to be a doctor 2023 fine art digital process and print
artist’s book, 42.5 cm x 30 cm closed
Waiting within this situation, in which the Taliban is invading all of Afghanistan, is not something easy. Especially as I am not able to come out of my home and the Taliban keep punishing those girls who go out without a Mahram (a man from their immediate family, like father/brother/husband) so this is the only reason that I cannot come out from home and fulfil my dream to become a doctor.
I am the only child of my family left behind in Afghanistan. I am far from my family and my dreams of studying, but I do not care about this entire critical situation because I believe and hope that always God keeps helping everyone through others, and I never become disappointed because human life is always about hope and looking for a better future.
I am proud that I am connected with people like you, role models for humanity and kindness, and who read our story and bring us hope. What I am thinking and feeling is that I will do anything to have my dreams come true and to reach a life where I can help others and look at their eyes for joy. I want to be a doctor, and I know I can be one and will do it one day. So, to have people like you makes me hopeful in the middle of so much hopelessness.