LIFESTYLE

Ask Ms Nightsky

Q.How should you deal with a family member that has done something to ruin your life, but you still love deep down?

El Runeburst

A.Dear El,

This one is a tough one Love is a very strong emotion that can be hard to deal with sometimes I have two things here to offer The first, is to try to slowly separate yourself from this member. Find things to keep yourself occupied to get them off your mind. Eventually you will find yourself spending less time with and around them, and that pain of love will not be as bad as it once was This will take time Take two on the situation, talk to them in case they did not know what they had done. Explain to them what was done wrong and how it made you feel. If they knew what they did and had done it on purpose, set some boundaries Be careful with what you say and tell them Don’t give them any fuel for a fire Find another person you trust to go to for some support. Support with something like this is a huge help. I truly wish you the best of luck here, dear. Family issues are one of the hardest to deal with You are in my thoughts

Q.I felt drawn to your name and looked into your purpose which I found admirable enough to give it a try I am a seasoned woman, having lived countless lives compared to those around me With that said, I have experienced much during my time. Friendship. Adversary. Love. Loss. There was a time I had it all and was quite content with it After the death of my beloved, all of which I had I hold no longer Whether it was by happenstance or intentional, I will not indulge with specifics, however the heart of the matter is I was content living out the rest of my days alone. It is an old tradition of my people that once we haven chosen to be with someone they are our partner in life, even throughout death I just so happen to be one that holds this tradition where I will live out the rest of my days waiting to be with the one I love. However, there is a young man that I feel has developed a fondness for me I am wise enough in my age to know when someone is just being cordial, however I feel the extension is performed with additional effort He’s also admitted to having what he calls a “boyish crush” to support my theory. I write to you, darling Nightsky, because I hold conflict if I should entertain this considering all that I have stated above His company has been refreshing and if I may continue to be forthright with the matter at hand, I rather miss being doted upon. What do you make of this?

A.Dear Ms,

Love can be a harsh thing Come and go in our lives, it can bring joy, happiness, loss, sadness, and even depression to us all

First, this depends on the tradition. Not having another lover, does this mean you can not marry or commit yourself to another? You can be with someone and not take it to making vows or getting married Enjoy his company, flirt back and forth Just make it clear that you can not fully commit to the relationship because of your tradition. If in time you feel close enough and feel comfortable making a commitment, remember we are different in our own ways We are not our mothers, sisters, grandmothers Our hearts are different from those of our families Those that truly loved you, wouldn’t they want you to be happy with life?

No matter what I tell you, one thing is for certain, always follow your heart when it comes to love Risks have to be taken or else we’d always live with the ‘what ifs’ The ‘what if’s’ lead to regret I’m not saying this will grow into love, it could just be a thing with flirts and good conversation, but if that's all it truly is and ever will be, would it hurt to have that sort of friendship? I wish you the best, lovely lady