Savvy September 2016

THE LIFESTYLE MANUAL FOR THE MODERN MOM

SEPTEMBER 2016 · THESAVVYMOMS.COM

THESE KIDS ARE SERIOUS

MOVERS & SHAKERS

MEET THE FABULOUS FIVE! PAGE 27.

THE BRICK WE CARRY ONE MOM'S HEARTBREAKING SUICIDE STORY

Saturday, September 17 9 a.m. to 3 p.m.

LEGO Robots Car Take-Apart Tinkering with Food Catapults

Regular Museum Admission

Activities for all Ages

500 President Clinton Ave, Ste 150

Water Rockets Battle Bots Large-Scale Pac Man And much more!

Little Rock, AR 72201

www.museumofdiscovery.org

501.396.7050

SEPTEMBER 2016 MODERN MOM 14 MAMA SAID

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF SCHOOL DROP-OFF AND PICK-UP

16 MIND, BODY & SOUL

GET CENTERED AND ORGANIZED FOR FALL

SAVVY FAMILY 18 SAVVY STYLE

SPIRIT ON THE SIDELINES

20 TASTY TAILGATE TREATS

FINGER FOODS EVERYONE WILL CHEER FOR

27 5 UNDER 5

FIVE KIDS WHO ARE DOING BIG THINGS

34 THE BRICK WE CARRY

KATHY RUTLEDGE CARRIES ON AFTER LOSING HER DAUGHTER TO SUICIDE

38 KEEP AN EYE OUT

EARLY DETECTION FOR KIDS’ VISION

SPECIAL SECTION

A SPECIAL SAVVY ADVERTISING SECTION

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40 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

CALENDAR, FOOD REVIEW & ENTERTAINMENT

12 ROAD TRIP

NORTHWEST ARKANSAS

46 BAG CHECK STACY HAMILTON

ON THE COVER: (FROM LEFT) RYLIN, TRIPP, JACK, LORI ANNE AND CARSON REPRESENT SAVVY’S 5 UNDER 5.

PHOTOGRAPHY BY LILY DARRAGH.

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SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

High quality child care looks like

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Children love mixing, mushing and squishing dough.

Learning about solids and liquids gets a little messy.

Children learn by doing. They learn best when they

But it’s worth it for the joy it brings.

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This issue of Savvy—and it’s my hope for every issue—is full of a wide range of topics with a multitude of layers and depths. I like to think of us like an evening at a good friend’s house. We can chat about the best health practices for our kids, what we’re wearing to the upcoming tailgate, recipes our picky eaters will actually like, and what irritates us about the other parents in the drop-off line. We can also feel completely safe getting real and opening up about our families and loss, and maybe even shed a tear before the night is over. If we are lucky, we all have a friend who has seen us display this wide spectrum of emotions in a single evening—and she’s probably the one friend who knows you the best.

In this issue we have a lot of great topical info. You’ll want to check out our Team Spirit Style on page 18 to get decked out for football season, and don’t forget Kerry Guice’s expertly-executed, (as always) kid-friendly recipes for your upcoming tailgate on page 20—think castiron skillet cheese dip and Nutella football desserts!

This month we also introduce Savvy's first 5 Under 5, featuring five amazing Arkansas tykes who are sure to accomplish big things! Find it on page 27.

We’ve planned your next trip to Northwest Arkansas on page 12, chock-full of places and things for the kids to enjoy. Within these pages, we also cover important health issues like how to care for kids’ vision, and how to tell if they are suffering from depression or having suicidal thoughts.

It’s a hard topic, but as September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, it’s a good time to talk about a scary truth. Among those ages 10-34, suicide is the second leading cause of death and statistics are not showing signs of dropping. This month, I interviewed Kathy Rutledge, a mother who lost her daughter, Rachel, to suicide six years ago. I was blown away by her openness, heartfelt emotion and her ability to share Rachel’s heartbreaking story, which you can find on page 34.

This particular interview was a difficult one for me, as I lost my brother to suicide almost two years ago. I admit, my first instinct was to assign this piece to one of the other capable Savvy writers, but I encouraged myself to tackle it (with the help of that voice in my head that chants "Come on, Amy, you can do it!" when I need an extra push). Besides, how could I encourage others to talk about suicide if I couldn’t take the first step? I was truly inspired after witnessing Kathy’s strength firsthand during our interview one afternoon at the Rutledge home. The meeting ended in tears and hugs, and that feeling that I’d just left a good friend’s house.

Talking about suicide is hard (experiencing a loss because of it is even harder), but it’s something we have to do if we hope to reduce those terrifying statistics and protect our children. I encourage Savvy readers to take the first step by educating yourself on suicide and mental illness. Then ask your kids how they are, and listen. Ask someone who’s experienced a loss from suicide how they are, and listen. Reach out to someone who’s having a tough time and be that friend for them. Experience their beautiful spectrum of emotions, and hope they walk away feeling like they’ve spent an evening with a very good friend.

Amy Gordy Editor, Savvy @SavvyAR

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SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

PHOTOGRAPHY: LILY DARRAGH

LIKE AN EVENING WITH A GOOD FRIEND...

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PUBLISHER BLAKE HANNAHS | blake@arktimes.com EDITOR AMY GORDY | amy@arktimes.com CREATIVE DIRECTOR MANDY KEENER | mandy@arktimes.com EDITOR AT LARGE REBEKAH LAWRENCE | rebekah@arktimes.com MANAGING DIRECTOR PHYLLIS BRITTON | phyllis@arktimes.com SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE LESA THOMAS | lesa@arktimes.com ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE WENDY REED | wendy@arktimes.com ADVERTISING TRAFFIC MANAGER ROLAND R. GLADDEN | roland@arktimes.com ADVERTISING COORDINATOR JIM HUNNICUTT | jimhunnicutt@arktimes.com SOCIAL MEDIA DIRECTOR LAUREN BUCHER | lauren@arktimes.com

DOUBLE YOUR FOOD BUCKS!

DOUBLE YOUR FOOD BUCKS! BRYAN MOATS | MIKE SPAIN | KEVIN WALTERMIRE GRAPHIC DESIGNERS

Get more fruits & vegetables when you use your SNAP/EBT BENEFITS at farmers markets

Get more fruitsPRODUCTION & vegetablesMANAGER when you use your SNAP/EBT | CONTROLLER WELDON BENEFITS at farmersWILSON markets

How Double Up Food Bucks works

How Double Up Food Bucks works IT DIRECTOR ROBERT CURFMAN

Bring your SNAP/ EBT card to the farmers market office or info booth before you shop.

Buy SNAP-eligible foods at the market with your SNAP/EBT dollars.

1.

Farmers Market Locations

We’ll match what you spend up to $20 every market day with free Double Up Food Bucks.

CENTRAL ARKANSAS

Bring your SNAP/ EBT card to the farmers market office or info booth before you shop.

Buy SNAP-eligible ACCOUNTS PAYABLE/OFFICE 1. MANAGER foodsKELLY at theJONES We’ll match

market with your what you spend up to SNAP/EBT dollars.

BILLING/COLLECTIONS $20 every market day

LINDA PHILLIPS

DIRECTOR FarmersCIRCULATION Market Locations

with free Double Up Food Bucks.

ANITRA HICKMAN

CENTRAL ARKANSAS

Bernice Gardens Farmers Market

The Farm Box (Tanner Farms)

Bernice Gardens Farmers Market

The Farm Box (Tanner Farms)

1401 Main St., Little Rock

Delivers to Pulaski County

1401 Main St., Little Rock

Delivers to Pulaski County

Little Rock Farmers Market

Historic Downtown Farmers Market

400 President Clinton Ave., Little Rock

121 Orange St., Hot Springs

To see more markets in Arkansas go to: http://arkansasobesity.org/work-teams/access-tohealthy-foods-team/double-up-food-bucks.html Contact us for more information: Jeremy.Adams@arkansasobesity.org or 501-712-2002.

Little Rock Farmers Market Historic Downtown Farmers ARKANSAS TIMES PUBLISHING

400 President ClintonARE Ave., Little Rock ALL MATERIALS HANDLED WITH DUE CARE; HOWEVER, THE PUBLISHER ASSUMES NO Market

RESPONSIBILITY FOR CARE AND SAFE RETURN OF UNSOLICITED MATERIALS. ALL LETTERS AND PHOTOS 121 Orange St., Hot Springs SENT TO SAVVY™ WILL BE TREATED AS INTENDED FOR PUBLICATION AND ARE SUBJECT TO SAVVY'S™ UNRESTRICTED RIGHT TO EDIT OR TO COMMENT EDITORIALLY. To more markets in Arkansas to: 501-375-2985.

201see E. MARKHAM ST. SUITE 200, LITTLE ROCK, go AR 72201 ALL CONTENTS ©2016 SAVVY™

http://arkansasobesity.org/work-teams/access-tohealthy-foods-team/double-up-food-bucks.html

Contact us for more information: Jeremy.Adams@arkansasobesity.org or 501-712-2002.

@SAVVY_AR 8

SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

DOUBLE YOUR FOOD BUCKS!

DOUBLE YOUR FOOD BUCKS!

contributors SEPTEMBER 2016

DWAIN HEBDA is a writer and editor living in Little Rock. He and his wife, Darlene, are the parents of four grown children.

The empty nesters spend their time traveling, working out and spoiling their two dogs.

KERRY GUICE is a food blogger and photographer living in Little Rock with her husband, two kids and their dog. When she’s not sharing her latest meal on Instagram, Kerry is planning her family’s next Arkansas adventure or crafting with her creative tots.

LILY DARRAGH is a photographer in Little Rock. She studied photography at Parsons the New School of Design in New York. Currently working out of a photography studio in downtown Little Rock, Lily loves to shoot people and places unique to Arkansas.

KD REEP is a writer and public relations practitioner in Little Rock. She owns Flywrite Communications, Inc., a public relations agency, and is the PR director for Mass Enthusiasm, a fullservice marketing communications firm in Little Rock.

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THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

9

news & notes

9-16

NATIONAL CHEESE PIZZA DAY!

Treat your smallest family members to a highly interactive, multisensory play designed for ages 2-5. “Tyke and Moppet: A Play for the Very Young,” follows two lovable characters as they explore an exciting new world. arkansasartscenter.org.

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Cover the sidewalks in chalk at Thea Paves the Way on the grounds of the William J. Clinton Presidential Center. Registration is free, and participation includes entrance to the Clinton Library valid the same day of the event. Look for Le Pops Gourmet Iced Lollies, face painters and more! theafoundation.org.

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NATIONAL STEPFAMILY DAY!

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23-OCT. 9

The classic children’s book about a boy who just can’t catch a break is live on stage at the Arkansas Arts Center.

Take the whole family to see “Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.”arkansasartscenter.org.

10 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

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ReStore & After is not your average art auction! Guests are invited to enjoy an evening of music, cocktails and one-of-a-kind art at Embassy Suites benefitting Habitat for Humanity of Central Arkansas. Local artists will have repurposed items from Habitat’s ReStore up for auction. habitatcentralar.org.

Discover your creativity at Tinkerfest, the Museum of Discovery’s annual all-day event with more than 40 hands-on, interactive activities. Each activity engages children and adults, teaches visitors how everyday objects work, and provides opportunities to explore the engineering and science behind building objects. museumofdiscovery.org.

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The Main Street Food Truck Festival will span six city blocks in Little Rock, and offer fare from more than 50 food trucks and food carts, and showcase artists at work, juried craft selections, children’s activities and beer gardens. mainstreetfoodtrucks.com.

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Help raise money for the Make a Wish Foundation at Rockin’ The Bald in the River Market pavillions. This event features live music, food trucks, free hot dogs for kids and bounce houses.

Admission is $15 for adults, $10 for kids 12 and under. rockinthebald.com.

PHOTOGRAPHY: COURTESY OF VENDORS

5

september

BIG ON FLAVOR AT BIG ORANGE KNOWN FOR THEIR TOP-NOTCH BURGERS AND CREATIVE MILKSHAKES, BIG ORANGE HAS BEEN A KIDFRIENDLY BISTRO SINCE THE FIRST LOCATION IN WEST LITTLE ROCK OPENED IN 2011. WE SENT 8-YEAR-OLD MADISON MACE TO THE MIDTOWN SPOT TO DO A LITTLE RESEARCH ON WHAT MAKES KIDS SWOON FOR A BIG ORANGE BURGER. HERE’S WHAT MADISON HAD TO SAY: SAVVY: WHAT DID YOU ORDER? MADISON: I had a kid’s cheeseburger with fries and a Fanta Strawberry. I ordered mine with lettuce, tomato, ketchup and mustard.

S: WHAT DID YOU LIKE ABOUT YOUR FOOD? M: It was tasty and good! The tomatoes were juicy and the pickles were big. The burger was juicy and the bun was soft and good.

S: WHAT DID YOU LIKE ABOUT THE RESTAURANT’S ATMOSPHERE? M: The temperature was cool inside. I liked that it had an upstairs and I could watch the people downstairs. I also liked the Coke bottle on the wall.

S: WOULD YOU COME BACK AND EAT HERE WITH FRIENDS? M: Absolutely!

S: WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE ABOUT THE RESTAURANT? M: I would have a bigger waiting area so people could wait inside. I would have root beer as a fountain drink.

S: How would you describe it to a friend?

M: I would tell them that they could have good food, that they can choose from fruit cups or fries, and that they have good service and the waiters are really nice.

SCREEN TIME

You can now browse the latest digital magazines with a Central Arkansas Library card! Use Flipster from EBSCO Information Services to browse your favorite magazines online. You can access this through the library’s website; all you need is your library card to read the latest issues of magazines including The Atlantic, Bon Appetit, Cosmopolitan, The New Yorker, People, Real Simple, Rolling Stone, Southern Living, Sports Illustrated and more. cals.org.

BOOK CLUB!

KIDS’ BOOKSHELF This historical fiction novel for young adults takes the reader on a journey back to 1759 to meet a group of Quapaw Native Americans. “Family Dreams” by Arkansas native Jason Ray is educational and entertaining, and the author is offering free copies to Arkansas middle schools. familydreams.net

AT THE BOX OFFICE

“Storks,” Sept. 23. The storks that used to deliver babies now deliver packages for global internet giant Cornerstore.com until one stork accidentally reactivates the Baby Making Machine, and heads out on a mission to restore the storks’ true mission in life.

“Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children,” Sept. 30. When Jake discovers clues to a mystery that spans alternate realities and times, he uncovers a secret refuge known as Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children. In this strange world he must figure out who is real, who can be trusted and who he really is.

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

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road trip

Fall is a vibrant time to visit Northwest Arkansas—the leaves are changing, Dickson Street is buzzing and Donald W. Reynolds Razorback Stadium is bursting at the seams. It’s a great time to pack up the kids and experience the Ozarks!

FAIRYTALE FARE

Step inside this cottage straight from the pages of a Brothers Grimm story. Briar Rose Bakery delights kids first with their own child-sized entry, then again with display cases full of exciting baked goods as well as soups, sandwiches and pizza. nwacottage.com.

CALL THOSE HOGS!

WOO PIG SOOIE!

Whether you love football or just come for the food, a Razorback game offers endless opportunities for family fun. Get decked out in red and root for the Hogs! Arrive early to experience the tailgate and load up on stadium snacks. arkansasrazorbacks.com.

DISCOVER & EXPLORE!

Kids can climb, play and learn at The Scott Family Amazeum in Bentonville. amazeum.org.

ARTISTIC FLAIR WHERE IT ALL BEGAN…

Learn how one of the state’s most successful families grew from opening a corner store in 1950 to owning one of the largest retail chains in the world. Bentonville’s Walmart Museum walks visitors through the timeline with interesting artifacts, a soda fountain and old-fashioned toy shop. walmartmuseum.com.

12 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

Kids will love to take a stroll through the galleries and grounds at the Crystal Bridges Museum of American Art in Bentonville. Through Sept. 19 look for “American Made: Treasures from the American Folk Art Museum,” which features more than 100 objects handmade by early Americans as well as live demonstrations. crystalbridges.org.

PHOTOS COURTESY OF VENUES/WALT BEAZLEY, UNIVERSITY OF ARKANSAS/ COURTESY ARKANSAS DEPARTMENT OF PARKS AND TOURISM

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mama said...

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF SCHOOL DROP-OFF AND PICK-UP

Lo, I am a mom, and thy friend, and have brought these commandments from the land of school drop-offs and pick-ups. Do these things in remembrance of me, and as common courtesy to your brothers and sisters in parenthood. If ye will but exercise these simple and courteous practices, the sanctity of parenthood and the sanity of all mankind may be preserved. So let it be written. So let it be done.

I. THOU SHALT PREPARE THYSELF AND THY CHILDREN BEFORE DROP-OFF AND PICK-UP You’ve seen this. Maybe you’ve even been the guilty party. Parents get all the way from home to school, and remember to put backpacks and—lord, help me—shoes on right in front of the school entrance, holding up everyone in line behind them.

And what about those pick-up violators who forget to clear the kid’s seat out, turning around in their own chair to clear a path while the poor kid waits in shame outside the car. Tiny Baby Jesus, help us not to curse them.

II. THOU SHALT EXPLAIN DROP-OFF AND PICK-UP PROTOCOL TO THY BABY DADDY I have kiddos at two separate schools. I don’t know about you, but in my humble experience, when there’s a problem in the drop-off or pick-up line, chances are it’s a person of the male persuasion. For the systems to work, we must all follow the rules. Even the dads.

III. THOU SHALT RESPECT THOSE WHO GOT OUT OF BED AND INTO LINE BEFORE YOU My 3-year-old knows there’s no cutting in line. Why is this concept so hard to understand? Is some people’s time more valuable than others? Is it acceptable to stalk side streets and swoop in front of someone just because you can? Is it OK if you’re super late for work?

The answer is no—never.

IV. REMEMBER PROTOCOL AND KEEP IT HOLY As a general rule, school administrators are smart people with good intentions. It’s likely they came up with drop-off and pick-up guidelines after years of experience. They’ve seen it all. They’re trying to protect our children’s safety while getting everyone to class on time. If rules exist there’s probably a good reason. We should follow them.

V. HONOR THE LAW AND THOU CHILDREN’S LIVES. PUT DOWN THY CELL PHONE. Despite signs posted conspicuously throughout school drives saying “School Zone. No Cell Phone Use,” we’re still chatting and texting as we drive toward the crowded nuclei of our children. Maybe if we stayed off our phones, we’d be better prepared for drop-off and pick-up.

VI. THOU SHALT NOT CONDUCT SOCIAL TIME IN THE DROP-OFF AND PICK-UP LINE But, we went to college together and she’s expecting her first baby. And, my son finally grasped that math concept his teacher’s been working on with him for weeks—I have to tell her. Every quick comment or summarized conversation we have with the teachers or staff that are outside facilitating drop-off and pick-up puts the parents behind us that much farther behind.

VII. THOU SHALT USE THINE OWN EYES AS WELL AS STUDENT CROSSING GUARD INSTRUCTION Older students sometimes serve as crossing guards, and while they receive extensive training and wear the smartest little orange and yellow reflective jackets…they’re still kids. Their synapses aren’t fully formed and their brain-to-hand reflexes are wonky. It’s a good idea to keep your eye on the crosswalk as well as their flashing wands.

VIII. THOU SHALT NOT DOUBLE PARK This happened to me last year. I was in the pick-up line, waiting my turn and dying to text someone, when the car in front of me moved forward. I did, too. Thankfully, I moved slowly because a parent had pulled up to my left side and stopped, waiting for his kid who ran in front of my car to hop into his.

IX. THOU SHALT NEVER EXIT THY CAR, FOR SUCH FOOLISHNESS SMITES NATURAL ORDER The blasphemy of school drop-off and pick-up, getting out of a vehicle while in line, is the worst of sins. What may seem like one super quick hug of a baby growing up too fast, getting out of and back into the car sends the whole system out of whack. If the need for one last squeeze is so great we can’t contain it, pull out of line, park and walk them inside.

X. THOU SHALT EXIT THE DROP-OFF AND PICK-UP LINE WITH EXPEDIENCY You did it! You dropped off your precious cargo. Now is not the time to check your phone. Keep going so the people behind you can exit, too.

And though it pains us to wait, the pick-up line isn’t the time to see our babies’ brilliant marble art. Amiright? We have a rule that backpacks stay closed until we get home. It helps not lose things, too.

Jen Holman is often irreverent and frequently imperfect. But she’s happy, by God, and that’s what matters. She lives in Little Rock with her husband and three children, striking that delicate balance between inspiration and frustration.

Jen has published three novels under the pen name Jen Crane, the second of which was selected by iTunes/iBooks as “Our Pick” in fantasy sci-fi.

14 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

Have a Friday Night Injury?

We Have a Saturday Morning Solution.

If you have a Friday Night Lights injury, come to the Next-Day Sports Injury Clinic at Arkansas Children’s Hospital. This Saturday morning clinic gives your family next-day access to the most specialized sports medicine and orthopedic care in the state. Our physicians understand how to best treat the developing athlete.

NEXT-DAY SPORTS INJURY CLINIC • No appointment necessary • Saturdays, Sept. 3 - Nov. 19, 9AM – 11AM • Located in the ACH Orthopedic Clinic Who’s Got Game? You tell us!

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THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

15

Pack away out-of-season clothes.

mind, body & soul

GET CENTERED

Clean Up as the Year Winds Down

BY KD REEP

BEFORE THE DELUGE OF SCHOOL REPORTS AND FAMILY DINNERS GETS A FIRM GRIP ON YOUR FAMILY, PAUSE TO TAKE A MINUTE TO PREPARE AND YOU’LL HAVE A SMOOTH CRUISE THROUGH THE REST OF THE YEAR. EXTERNAL SPACE Spring is not the only time to take a critical look at your belongings and decipher what you can and can’t live without. With the holidays on the horizon, more things will accumulate and appear in your home, so make room for them now. Here are some tips for fall cleaning and organizing: Sort your kids’ outgrown clothes and consign them, give them to family or friends who have children that could wear them, or donate them to a thrift shop. This will make way for new school clothes, winter wear and gifts they may get at the end of the year.

Pack out-of-season clothes in bins and store in unused space, such as under the bed, the hall closet, attic or garage. You can do this with toys, too, and bring them out when your kids grow bored with other playthings.

When you’re organizing for kids, start at the floor and work your way up. Put clothes and toys used most often on the closet floor, lowest shelves and bottom drawers. This gives younger children easy access, and gives you space to store lesser-used things.

Label, label, label. Even if your children can’t yet read, use pictures to note what things are and where things go. This will make it easier for kids to find and return their clothes, toys and books.

To make school mornings as smooth as possible, accomplish every task you can the night before. This includes getting a bath, setting out clothes for the next day, packing lunch or acquiring lunch money, putting the backpack together, signing permission slips and finishing special projects.

You can even set the breakfast table for the next day so all that has to be done is wake up, get dressed, eat breakfast, brush teeth, grab stuff and go.

INTERNAL SPACE For moms, finding a second to catch your breath is difficult enough, but making time for self-care can seem impossible. However, caring for and making yourself a priority is crucial to properly caring for your family. This autumn, make a vow to yourself to do one thing to improve your health and well-being.

Exchange a bad habit for a good one. This can be something as simple as taking a half-hour walk every day to taking steps to stop smoking.

Whatever it is, take on one habit at a time and give yourself permission to focus on that one thing. It will ensure your success.

16 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

Get some rest. Sleep can be hard to come by, especially if you have little ones. If you can’t get a solid eight hours or more of sleep each night, make time for naps. Dream-inducing sleep helps your mind reset and your body repair itself. The more solid sleep you get, the better you will feel and perform.

Exercise. While chasing after children may seem like enough, it’s not quite what will help your body and mind recharge. Get 30 minutes of exercise every day—walking, running, dancing, weight training, tap dancing—whatever gets you moving and a little out of breath. It will work out stress and bring you closer to a sense of peace.

Eat breakfast and make (and keep) medical checkups. You are the guardian of your family’s health, but who guards yours? Every morning, consume something besides coffee to give you energy until lunch. Find and meet with a primary care physician and an obstetrician-gynecologist a minimum of once every year.

SOUL While caring for your family’s physical, mental and emotional needs is the top priority for mothers, women often neglect their own talents, desires and callings. Caring for your spirit is necessary for making life the fullest experience it can be. If your soul is calling to you, then clear away the cobwebs and gain clarity for the rest of the year.

Get up before anyone else in your home and spend that time doing something just for you. It can be to exercise, read, journal, pray, meditate—whatever allows you to check into the person you are.

Create. You can paint, color in an adult coloring book, sew, craft, decorate, etc. Creating something stimulates the creator, causing her to have more energy, improved mood, and the ability to see more possibilities and opportunities.

Sing. You don’t have to be good at it, you don’t have to be in key, you don’t even have to sing the right words. Turn on the shower, shut the door and belt out your favorite tune. Pop in the earphones after dropping off the kids at school and crescendo with Adele.

Whatever song, turn it up and let it go. Singing releases endorphins, which help reduce stress and anxiety. Besides, it’s all kinds of fun.

Arkansas Virtual Academy Provides Flexibility, Learning to State’s Students Not so long ago in Arkansas, it was customary to arrange school around the students’ schedules as they were needed at home to farm fields and harvest crops. Today, this same approach to making learning flexible to a student and parent’s schedule is working seamlessly through the Arkansas Virtual Academy (ARVA).

Unlike homeschooling, the Arkansas Virtual Academy is a publicly-funded online charter school that provides families and students with a complete set of curriculum, lesson planning programs, books and instructional materials, the use of a computer and subsidized Internet access for qualifying students, and the guidance of a highly-qualified, licensed teacher. Everything needed for an exceptional education is provided to students who participate in ARVA. “Virtual schooling provides a quality option for families and parents who want to be more involved in their child’s learning,” said Dr. Scott Sides, head of school at ARVA. “For students, it allows them to set out on an individual path to learning in a safe and supportive atmosphere. Virtual learning provides an opportunity to support the individual needs of students and provide additional time or assistance when needed. We leverage the expertise of teachers, working with parents who are committed to the academic growth of their children, and it works.”

The Arkansas Virtual Academy uses the world-class K-12 curriculum, which meets or exceeds state standards. Because ARVA is a publicly-funded open-enrollment charter school, students are required to participate in state-mandated standardized achievement tests to demonstrate content understanding and academic progress. These achievement

measures, such as state testing, are important to ARVA as it works to ensure each of its students is excelling in his or her academic pursuits.

Haley Woodruff and her daughter, Brooklyn, have done just that for four years at ARVA. Brooklyn is a gymnast in northwest Arkansas who practices 33 hours per week, and conventional school does not mesh with her schedule. As one of sixteen girls who pursue gymnastics and attend ARVA, Brooklyn—and her mom—is pleased with the progress she is making.

“When she was in public school, she would get frustrated because she would finish her work first but would have to stop and wait for others in her class to finish theirs before she could move on,” Haley said. “With ARVA, she can progress as fast as she likes. The biggest advantage is that Brooklyn can continue the sport she loves at the level she wants to pursue it, and we have much more time together since she gets her practices done during the day, which frees up our evenings to be together as a family.”

The freedom to pursue an activity the student loves, travel as needed and still obtain a top-notch education in a public school system is what makes ARVA the best option for parents, students and educators who require flexibility, diversity and support.

“We strive to create a balanced approach in educating our students that provides the support and student-centered focus required to meet the needs of students as unique and individual learners,” Dr. Sides said. “ARVA is an excellent choice for families who are interested in being actively involved in their children’s education.”

For more information about Arkansas Virtual Academy and how it can help your family meet your student’s unique learning needs, visit online at ARVA.k12.com, like on Facebook at ArkansasVirtualAcademy or call 866-339-4951. advertorial

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No matter what your alma mater, there’s always a place to cheer this football season in Arkansas.

Here are the home schedules of a few of The Natural State’s finest: UNIVERSITY OF ARKANSAS RAZORBACKS Sept. 3, Louisiana Tech Sept. 17, Texas State Sept. 24, Texas A&M (Arlington) Oct. 1, Alcorn State (Little Rock) Oct. 8, Alabama Oct. 15, Ole Miss Nov. 5, Florida Nov. 12, LSU ARKANSAS STATE RED WOLVES Sept. 2, Toledo Rockets Sept. 24, Central Arkansas Bears Oct. 5, Georgia Southern Eagles Oct. 15, South Alabama Jaguars Oct. 29, ULM Warhawks Nov. 12, New Mexico State Aggies UNIVERSITY OF CENTRAL ARKANSAS BEARS Sept. 1, Houston Baptist University Sept. 10, Samford University Sept. 17, Northwestern State University Oct. 22, Lamar University Nov. 12, Nicholls State University

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WHEN TAILGATING OR WATCHING THE GAME AT HOME WITH KIDS, IT’S FUN TO MAKE SNACKS THAT ARE GEARED TOWARD THEM AND GROWN-UP APPROVED, TOO! STORY AND PHOTOGRAPHY BY KERRY GUICE

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s a kid, football was the soundtrack of fall in our house. My dad grew up in the San Francisco area, so he and my brother always get so fired up about NFL games, especially when the 49ers do well. As a teenager, Friday night football was the highlight of the week. The school week was done, and everyone gathered at the Conway High School stadium to cheer on the players and have fun with friends. Now, as an adult, football is all about the food! It’s about getting together with friends, food and drinks, and cheering for a common goal (like the Razorbacks winning)!

Who doesn’t love a hot, fresh-from-the-oven soft pretzel? Nacho cheese dip is also a game-day staple, and the two are dreamy together. A fun way to get the kids involved in the game is to let them choose which team they want to root for, and top some popcorn with M&M’s that match their team’s color! The Nutella footballs though are (not surprisingly) always the biggest hit with my kids. There are apple slices on top, so that makes it healthy, right? My personal favorite game-day snacks are cauli-tots! These are a really great way to introduce your kids to cauliflower, because these snacks are no boring veggie. Warm, crunchy on the outside, creamy in the middle tots are made with cauliflower and loads of cheese, then baked in the oven. The best thing about them is that, unlike football, you can choose any kind of cheese and you’re still guaranteed to win every time! I love creating memories, and football season is a great time to do just that.

20 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

CAULI-TOTS

Makes about 25-30 tots ½ head of cauliflower, chopped (2 heaping cups) 1 egg 1 cup shredded cheese, any kind (I used a mix of cheddar and fontina) ½ cup panko bread crumbs, plus more for coating ½ teaspoon garlic powder ½ teaspoon sea salt ¼ teaspoon ground pepper 1 teaspoon chopped fresh herbs, optional (chives, basil, thyme, rosemary) Chop the cauliflower and then steam it until soft but not mushy. Transfer to a food processor until blended. Spoon into a bowl, and add bread crumbs, spices, egg and cheese (and herbs, if using). Stir until combined, then chill in the refrigerator for 30 minutes to an hour.

Preheat oven to 375°F. Spoon a small amount (about 2 teaspoons) of mixture into your hand and roll it into the shape of a tater tot. Coat in thin layer of panko until it’s not sticky anymore, and place on a greased cookie sheet. Bake at 375 for 25-30 minutes, turning over halfway through. Serve hot. *FOOTBALL IS ALL ABOUT FOOD, FRIENDS, FUN AND A LITTLE HEALTHY COMPETITION!

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

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SOFT PRETZELS

Makes about 20 pretzel sticks 5 cups all-purpose-flour 1½ cups warm water ½ cup warm milk 1 tablespoon salt 1 tablespoon yeast 1 tablespoon sugar cup melted butter Coarse sea salt for sprinkling cup baking soda Stir together warm water, sugar and yeast in the bowl of a stand mixer and let sit 5 minutes until it starts to foam. Add salt, then slowly add flour, then add warm milk. Using the dough hook attachment, knead until dough comes off the sides of the bowl. Cover bowl with damp dish towel and let rise until doubled in size, about an hour.

*SERVE CHEESE SAUCE IN A HOT SKILLET TO KEEP IT WARM!

Preheat your oven to 475°F. Punch down the dough and then coat your hands in flour. Take a small handful of dough and roll it into a 6-inch rope. Repeat and line them up on a cookie sheet, and let rise another 15 minutes. While rising, bring 6 cups of water to a boil, and then add the baking soda. Slowly drop the pretzel sticks into the boiling baking soda water for 1 minute, then transfer back to the baking sheet. Brush with the melted butter and sprinkle with the coarse sea salt. Bake for 10 minutes, until golden brown. Brush again with melted butter, if desired. Best served warm, and can be eaten alone or with mustard or cheese dip. *(For cinnamon sugar pretzel sticks, skip the coarse sea salt, and when they are still hot from the oven, brush with extra melted butter, then coat in a mixture of 3 tablespoons sugar and 1 teaspoon cinnamon.)

NACHO CHEESE SAUCE Makes about 2 cups cheese dip

NUTELLA FOOTBALLS Sandwich bread (the thicker the better) Nutella Fresh apple Using a football-shaped cookie cutter (or a knife), cut out a football shape in each slice of bread (I got two footballs per slice). Smooth a couple teaspoons of Nutella over the top. Using a sharp knife, cut a chunk of the apple, and then slice a few long sticks. Make one stick the center of the “football stitching” and then cut smaller sticks for the side stitching. Easy peasy!

22 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

4 tablespoons butter 2 tablespoons flour 1½ cups warm milk ¼ teaspoon sea salt ¼ teaspoon ground white pepper ½ teaspoon chili powder 8 ounces sharp cheddar cheese, grated fresh from a block (not from a pre-packaged bag of shredded cheese, these contain anti-caking agents that can make the sauce gritty) Spoon of salsa and sprinkle of chili powder for garnish, optional

Melt butter over medium-low heat. Whisk in flour until combined into a smooth paste, then slowly add warm milk (cold milk will separate the sauce!) and whisk until smooth. Add spices, whisk again, and then add grated cheese. Stir until sauce is smooth (add more warm milk a spoonful at a time if you like your dip thinner). Serve hot! This will thicken/harden as it cools, so serve quickly or keep in a hot skillet or small slow cooker. Great with tortilla chips or soft pretzels (or anything edible).

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MEET SAVVY’S READER-NOMINATED 5 UNDER 5! THESE KIDS REPRESENT SOME OF THE STATE’S MOST ANIMATED MOVERS AND SHAKERS—LITERALLY. THEY WERE NOMINATED BY PROUD PARENTS FOR THEIR VAST ACCOMPLISHMENTS INCLUDING COUNTING TO 20, SEAMLESS TRANSITIONS THROUGH POTTY TRAINING, EATING ALL THEIR VEGETABLES AND MUCH MORE. PHOTOGRAPHY BY LILY DARRAGH

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

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LORI ANNE LOVES LEARNING WITH HER LEAP FROG!

LORI ANNE KING

This talented 2-year-old is tackling milestones and showing no signs of slowing down. She lives in Conway with her parents, Carl and Sarah King. Here’s what Mom had to say about her tenacious toddler: What amazes us most about Lori Anne’s development is just how quickly she grasps certain concepts. She learned the alphabet almost overnight, and began counting and identifying numbers and letters by sight (even out of sequence) well before her second birthday! Her motor skills and coordination, according to her pediatrician, have also been very advanced. Lori reached milestones for rolling, crawling, standing and walking much earlier than all of her playmates, and recently started dancing and singing completely on her own.

28 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

TRIPP IS SERIOUSLY COOL!

KENNETH WAYNE "TRIPP” FREEMAN III

It’s a big name for a big personality! Tripp is 3 years old and a very recent big brother who is loving his new role. He lives in Bryant with his parents, Kenneth and Heidi Freeman.

Here’s what Mom had to say about her helpful handful: I would like to nominate Tripp for his progress with potty training. It may seem like a small thing, but any mom can tell you that when your child starts going in the potty it’s like winning the lottery! He also recently became a big brother, which helped with his eagerness in becoming a “big boy.” Like his older siblings, Tripp has also taken a liking to being a big brother and helping with the baby. As a working mom of four, they have all made my job as a wife, mother and teacher easier.

Although Tripp is only 3, he too, eagerly helps with small tasks such as throwing diapers away and passing me clean ones.

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

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CARSON SHAVERS MAXWELL

He’s the strong, not-so-silent type. Carson Shavers Maxwell is 15 months old and already learning how to charm the ladies, dismantle towers of blocks and squeal with delight in the car. He lives in Little Rock with his parents, Chris Maxwell and Courtney Bradford. Here’s what Mom had to say about her dimpled dumpling: Carson’s smile and personality will brighten any room that he enters! He has his Dad’s social butterfly spirit and charming way with the ladies. He also has a calm and reserved side, which he gets from his mommy.

Carson uses his unusual strength to power-climb up and down the stairs, and he’s also recently started walking.

He started sleeping through the night when he was 9 months old, which I attribute to keeping him on a schedule. He is very adamant about feeding himself, especially when it’s cheese or mashed potatoes. Family trips to the store are never dull when Carson decides to test out his vocal cords by talking and yelling as loud as he can to hear his own voice.

CARSON LOVES TO TAKE APART HIS BLOCKS AND ANYTHING THAT SEEMS “TOO ORGANIZED.”

30 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

SHE HAS A HEART AS BIG AS HER HAIR BOW!

RYLIN GRACE NGUYEN

Poised and pageant-ready, 3-year-old Rylin Grace is the reigning 2016 Tiny Miss International Girl and reigning princess of her home in Benton with parents Linh and Rhonda Nguyen. Here’s what Mom had to say about her surprise bundle of joy: At birth, Rylin only weighed two pounds. Even though she was tiny and her start was uncertain, she hasn’t missed a beat! She is the youngest of our three children and the princess of our home.

After being married to my high school sweetheart for 22 years and having two teenage boys, we thought our lives were complete, but the good Lord had other plans for our family and blessed us with a little girl who I know will do big things!

Rylin enjoys natural pageants, cheerleading and cheer stunting. One of the best things about Rylin is that she not only has outer beauty, she also has inner beauty. She is so kind to others and supports her little friends already at a young age. She is such a happy child and makes friends of all ages everywhere we go.

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

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FRESH FROM JACK'S CARROT PATCH!

JACK SLADE

A foodie in the making, this gardening 4-year-old loves trying new vegetables and developing his green thumb. He lives in Little Rock with his parents, David and Kelly Slade. Here’s what Mom had to say about her future garden guru: This is Jack Slade, our 4-year-old food lover! When asked what vegetables he prefers, he happily shouts “All of them!”

He began developing his sophisticated palate as a young baby with a preference for peas. He moved on to savory braised meat dishes and even salmon with carrots and orange zest, and roasted Brussels sprouts, a family favorite. This summer has been extra fun because Jack grew his own carrots from seeds. He planted them with his Poppa, cared for them the whole season, and enjoyed so many as afterschool snacks.

32 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

This ad was developed under grant number 1U79SM061722-01 from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS). The views, policies, and opinions expressed are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of SAMHSA or HHS. A SPECIAL SAVVY ADVERTISING SECTION

savvy family

(Clockwise from top left) Dan, Joel, Kathy and Rachel Rutledge in 2010 on their last trip before Rachel got sick; Rachel was a varsity cheerleader at Mount St. Mary; Rachel, Joel and Dan traveling in 2010; Rachel had a carefree spirit; and Rachel and Kathy headed to New York City to celebrate her 16th birthday.

ONE MOTHER’S BRAVE TESTIMONY AND THE IMPACT SUICIDE HAD ON HER FAMILY

BY AMY GORDY PHOTOGRAPHY COURTESY KATHY RUTLEDGE

34 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

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nytime we lose a loved one it’s hard. The grieving process is a long, difficult path that is inconceivably more complicated if your loved one made the choice to leave this world on their own. Anger and guilt can be unbearable, social stigma can leave one feeling outcast and alone, and the empty hole the lost person leaves behind is something that never fully heals. It’s there when you walk past their bedroom door or their empty seat in the classroom, or each time you set the dinner table with one less place setting. It’s on that first holiday, or that first missed birthday or family gathering that their absence feels unendurable.

Suicide is a quiet epidemic in the U.S. right now. “When you look at the statistics, it is on the rise,” said Christopher Epperson, director for the Arkansas chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. “Of all the national leading causes of death, suicide is the only one moving in an upward direction, and that’s very concerning.”

The statistics tell us that in Arkansas, the number of deaths by suicide is twice the number of deaths by homicide, and it is predominantly taking its toll on the young—it’s the second leading cause of death for ages 10-34. While suicide still experiences a level of social aversion, Epperson feels that the community is slowly becoming more comfortable talking about it along with its primary contributing factor: mental illness.

“Usually when a death occurs, people feel passionate about bringing over a casserole and making sure you are OK. When the death occurs because of mental illness, it becomes harder for people to talk about.

We have to understand that the brain is a part of the body and a part of who we all are,” Epperson said.

One of the leading risk factors for suicide is depression, notably when paired with mental illness such as substance abuse, anxiety disorders, schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Statistics show that nearly 90 percent of those who die by suicide have a mental illness at the time of their death. Mental illness can affect anyone, any gender, any race and any age.

In 2010, 18-year-old Rachel Rutledge was diagnosed as bipolar after her first manic episode, which occurred on an orientation trip at the University of Missouri. She had been accepted to the school’s journalism department on a full scholarship, and planned to start her freshman year in just a few months. Rachel was a Suma Cum Laude graduate of Mount St. Mary Academy, a private all-girls Catholic high school in Little Rock. She was on the varsity cheerleading squad, was the editor of the school newspaper and the recipient of numerous scholarships and awards. Her future was promising. Her past was full of love, friendships and adventure.

“Rachel was always excited. She was bright, beautiful and very social,” her mother, Kathy Rutledge, described her. “We called her the ‘cruise director,’ she was always planning social events. She was well loved by her friends. After her death, her friends’ moms would come to me and say how Rachel was always so nice. She was a prolific reader and an excellent writer,” she said.

Rachel was on track to fulfill her lifelong dreams of attending college and becoming a professional writer. Kathy flipped through books of her daughter’s poetry, pointing out passages that exhibit insight well beyond the typical high school student. After Rachel’s diagnosis, there was a noticeable tonal shift in her writing. Her poems began to mirror her feelings of despair and fear, and then, Kathy said, “She just lost her ability to write. I think that was really the end of it for her, when she couldn’t write anymore.”

Rachel’s decline was swift and unexpected. The Rutledge family carries a trait for bipolar disorder—a trait that Kathy believes was triggered in her daughter after an event at school, and quickly spiraled out of control. Bipolar disorder, formerly called manic depression, causes extreme mood swings in a person that can last extended periods of time. Typically a person experiences a period of mania that can include emotional highs, irritability, racing thoughts and, in severe cases, a break from reality known as psychosis. This is followed by a shift into depression, which is typically marked by intense feelings of sadness and hopelessness, loss of motivation or appetite and a looming sense of despair.

Rachel experienced her first manic episode during a June orientation weekend at Mizzou. “She just got out of the car and took off. We had no idea where she was going. She didn’t know anyone there, or know where anything was. They have a hospital facility on campus there, and we got a call from the ER saying they had her, and we needed to come there immediately. We got there and she was just completely delusional. They kept her there for a week and diagnosed her as bipolar.

She saw psychiatrists and therapists, but when they released her and we got back home it continued.”

Kathy knew then that Rachel wouldn’t be attending college in the fall. They made the heartbreaking decision to postpone her freshman year, something she said Rachel had been looking forward to since the second grade.

“I told Rachel that bipolar is a manageable disease. There are medications that can keep it under control,” Kathy said. Rachel had battled with an eating disorder in high school that she had since gotten under control, until the stress of her diagnosis brought it back in full swing. “She was just throwing up the medication and it never had a chance to work.”

Rachel was hospitalized again for mania in July. Kathy decided to petition for guardianship over her daughter since she was 18 years old and therefore an adult, but not in the state of mind to make sound decisions. “I had to testify against my child to get the guardianship.

That was very hard,” she said.

Rachel underwent electroshock therapy six times and showed no signs of improvement. She spent three weeks in the state hospital where Kathy visited every day, and was then transferred to an outpatient facility for substance abuse for two weeks, where the Rutledge family was not allowed to have any contact with her.

“She never should have been in that place. She didn’t have substance abuse issues, I feel like it was that place that killed her. They even had the gall to send me a $12,000 bill later on and said they were charging me because they found her case to not be acute. I sent them back her obituary and they dropped it.”

Rachel was released from her last stay in a facility in September and was severely depressed. “Those were just horrible times. Twice she attempted suicide after she returned home. She lost her ability to write.

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

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3 QUESTIONS ON SUICIDE How can a person who is suicidal get help? That person needs to reach out to someone else immediately. If they are in crisis right now, they can call 1-800-273TALK any time 24/7 in the U.S. to speak to someone. Help is always available at that number. If they have a trusted friend or family member who can be supportive, it’s also a good idea to reach out to that person as well for support, particularly if they can come in person. Seek professional help as soon as possible.

How can you help a loved one that is suicidal? Ask them directly if suicide is something they want to do. If they say yes, or you really believe they are, get professional help as soon as possible. You can call 1-800-273-TALK with that person present so that you can talk to someone who is trained in intervention.

What are warning signs you can look for in your child?

Major changes in their behavior are always something to be aware of. If your child makes straight A’s and suddenly has failing grades, something may not be quite right.

Changes in eating, sleeping and hygiene may also be indicators that a child is having psychological distress. Listen to what your child says, and pay attention to talk of not being able to go on, feeling hopeless, helpless or actively talking about suicide.

Provided by the Suicide Prevention Program HELPFUL RESOURCES: American Association of Suicidology, sprc.org Center For Good Mourning, archildrens.org American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, afsp.org

"THE FIRST YEAR, PAIN WAS ALL I KNEW. AND I JUST THOUGHT, IF THIS IS THE PAIN THAT I FEEL, I CAN'T BELIEVE THE PAIN SHE MUST HAVE BEEN IN." She was angry and combative. I was constantly worried I was going to wake up and find her somewhere in the home. When someone is that sick with depression it’s just terrible.”

The Rutledge family was at a loss for what to do for their daughter at that point. “A moment that will always stand out in my mind and break my heart was a conversation after she came back from the hospital from a suicide attempt. She was shrieking at me and saying, ‘I hate you!’ and I asked her why and she said, ‘because you can’t help me.’ That hit pretty hard with me.”

It was Dec. 9, a Thursday evening, and just six months since her initial diagnosis, when Rachel left the Rutledge home. The family had come to another breaking point and Kathy had let Rachel know that she was going to have to return to a facility for more help.

“She didn’t come back that night, and we had an agreement always that if she stayed out late, she would come and wake me up to let me know she was back home. Very often, she’d come tiptoeing into my bedroom late at night, with the light of her cell phone lighting her way, and tap me to say goodnight. My son, Dan, was in the bed with me the night she didn’t come home. It was around 3 or 4 a.m., I heard a creaking on the floor that night and it woke me up. I thought it was her, but there was nothing there. My mother says that was her way of letting me know she had gone home.”

After alerting police that her daughter had not returned that night, Kathy went looking for and found Rachel the following morning. “I will never heal from this. I am just not the same person I was before. The first year, pain was all I knew. And I just thought, if this is the pain that I feel, I can’t believe the pain that she must have been in. My faith was severely damaged.

I struggled in my marriage. I tried to keep up some family traditions, but couldn’t.”

Due to the stigma surrounding a loss by suicide, Kathy had many friends turn away from her. “I would confront them about it and was told by some that they were ‘uncomfortable’ around me. I found out that friends were having similar issue with their kids and I said to them,

‘Why didn’t you call me?’ and their answer was, ‘Well, we wanted a happy ending.’”

Kathy pointed to the statistic that suicide is the second leading cause of death in her daughter’s age group. “Until you address mental health and stop stigmatizing it, this isn’t going to change. Education and awareness on suicide is good, but education on mental illness is essential in this.”

After six years of time to heal, Kathy tried to describe her complicated, ever-changing range of emotions, “I was mad at myself at first, and I’ll be guilty until I die and that’s just a mom thing. I’ve felt anger and intense sorrow, and I know that I’ll never heal. There will always be a place at the table where she sat. Each time I hear the ‘Wedding March’ my heart breaks for the experiences she won’t have. But, I am able to have happy times now, too. I love my family, and I have good health.”

Kathy references a poignant scene from the David Lindsay-Abaire film, “Rabbit Hole” to describe her grief: At some point it becomes bearable. It turns into something you can crawl out from under, and carry around—like a brick in your pocket. And you forget it every once in a while, but then you reach in for whatever reason and there it is: “Oh, right.

That.” ... but it’s what you have instead of your son, so you don’t wanna let go of it either. So you carry it around. And it doesn’t go away, which is ... fine, actually.

Kathy, her husband, Joel, their son, Dan, and Rachel’s many friends along with the countless others who suffer a loss by suicide all carry that brick.

Christopher Epperson, who has lost several friends to suicide as well, hopes to make a change in Arkansas through the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s Arkansas Chapter. Through fundraising they hope educate the community and parents, and to continue research to better understand suicide and help healing families who have suffered a loss.

“Suicide brings on a very complex grief process,” Epperson said. “Education and support for these families is so important.”

For more information on suicide prevention and local programs and events visit afsp.org/chapter/afsp-arkansas.

36 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

SUICIDE WARNING SIGNS Talking About Suicide: Any talk about suicide, dying or self-harm, such as “I wish I hadn’t been born,” “If I see you again...” or “I’d be better off dead.”

Seeking Out Lethal Means: Seeking access to guns, pills, knives or other objects that could be used in a suicide attempt.

Preoccupation With Death: Unusual focus on death, dying or violence. Writing poems or stories about death.

No Hope for the Future: Feelings of helplessness, hopelessness and being trapped. Feeling that “There’s no way out,” or the belief that things will never get better or change.

Self-loathing, Self-hatred: Feelings of worthlessness, guilt, shame and self-hatred. Feeling like a burden or saying things like, “Everyone would be better off without me.”

Getting Affairs in Order: Making out a will. Giving away prized possessions. Making arrangements for family members.

Saying Goodbye: Unusual or unexpected visits or calls to family and friends. Saying goodbye to people as if they won’t be seen again.

Withdrawing From Others: Withdrawing from friends and family.

Increasing social isolation. Desire to be left alone.

Self-destructive Behavior: Increased alcohol or drug use, reckless driving or unsafe sex. Taking unnecessary risks as if they have a “death wish.”

Sudden Sense of Calm: A sudden sense of calm and happiness after being extremely depressed can mean that the person has made a decision to try suicide.

Provided by Psycamore Psychiatric, LLC STATS ON TEEN MENTAL HEALTH · According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, mental health conditions are common among teens and young adults.

One in five lives with a mental health condition—half develop the condition by age 14 and three quarters by age 24. · A national and international literature review found that an average of 17 percent of young people experience an emotional, mental or behavioral disorder.

YOUR HOPES. YOUR STORY. OUR FOCUS. For over 130 years, Centers for Youth and Families has remained true to our mission to build socially and emotionally healthy children, families, and communities.

The Centers’ Outpatient Clinic provides same day access for treatment to help address emotional needs today, when you need it most. Our trauma-focused care throughout our programs helps children, teens, young adults, and thier families find hope, learn resilience, and rediscover possible.

CALL TODAY

Little Rock • Monticello 501.666.8686 or 888.868.0023 www.cfyf.org

· Substance abuse or dependence was the most commonly diagnosed for young people, followed by anxiety disorders, depressive disorders and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. · The onset for 50 percent of adult mental health disorders occurs by age 14, and for 75 percent of adults by age 24.

Provided by The Bridgeway, thebridgeway.com.

@TheCentersAR THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

37

savvy family Know when it's time to see an ophthalmologist.

KEEP AN EYE OUT Early detection can make a world of difference for children’s vision BY DWAIN HEBDA

W

ith the dawning of the school year comes the opportunity for new discoveries and personal growth for Arkansas’s students.

Some of these children and youth, however, will struggle to get the most out of their lessons due to problems with their vision.

Sight problems are common among school-age kids. In fact, Prevent Blindness America estimates that one in four school-age children have some form of vision problem. Such issues aren’t just irritating, they make schoolwork markedly more difficult, affect children in sports and activities and can have potentially serious ramifications related to self-esteem, socialization and adjustment in school.

Identifying vision problems actually starts much earlier than the first day of classes; children should have their first eye exam within the first six months of life, and where you go for that exam depends on the circumstances.

“For a child who’s healthy, has no family history of eye problems and was full term, that child follows up with the pediatrician for the normal ‘well baby’ exam,” said Dr. Paul Phillips, pediatric ophthalmologist with Arkansas Children’s Hospital in Little Rock.

“If there’s a family history of any eye problems in childhood, that child should be evaluated by an ophthalmologist, I would say, by 4 or 5 months old. If that exam is normal, they can then follow up with their pediatrician like all the other kids.

“The second thing that’s important is if the child was born premature.

Children of a premature birth all get eye exams in the hospital for all the problems that prematurity can cause in the eyes. At 4 to 6 months of age parents should follow up with an ophthalmologist—even if the child has been discharged from the hospital—and after that they can follow up with their pediatrician.”

Parents also shouldn’t discount their own powers of observation when it comes to their children’s vision. Watching even very young children interact with the world around them can yield a lot of information.

38 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

“What the pediatrician should be concerned about is the same thing the parent will want to look for,” Phillips said. “By 4 to 5 months of age, the child should be following faces and objects, and that’s pretty intuitive for parents. If the child, by 4 or 5 months and sometimes even earlier, is not responding [parents] generally get pretty alarmed.”

Two other things for parents to watch for, Phillips said, are eyes that demonstrate a tremor-like shakiness or eyes that are misaligned.

(The latter condition is more concerning after 3 months because babies younger than that commonly display eye misalignment as their brains play catch-up.) If you do observe such signs, Phillips said skip the pediatrician and head straight for a specialist, as these can be symptomatic of one of a number of serious conditions.

“Of the things that show up as problems, one of the most common is the eyes don’t match,” Phillips said. “In other words, the eyes need glasses but the right eye needs one prescription and the left eye needs another.

The brain can only use one of the eyes and it ignores the other.

“A less common one, but not rare, are cataracts. It’s a little different than old-age cataracts, but babies can get cataracts. A third one would be optic nerve abnormality, a case where the optic nerve that comes from the brain to the eye did not form properly.”

Phillips said it’s not only important for parents to know what symptoms to look for, but which eye professional to take their children to for help once they notice them. An ophthalmologist is a doctor who specializes in medical and surgical care of eye disease, while an optometrist provides primary vision care but does not have a medical degree.

“Optometrists know relevant things in their field; indeed we have one at Children’s,” he said. “But for diagnosing and treating these conditions, the child should be evaluated by an ophthalmologist and possibly even a pediatric ophthalmologist who, in addition to specializing in the eye, specializes in diseases that involve children.”

Assuming none of the above-described problems are present, children should receive their second eye exam at around age 3 and then again right before starting school. From there, have your kids’ eyes checked every year if they wear glasses, every two years if they don’t. And make sure they’re getting a comprehensive eye exam, which, as AllAboutVision.com notes, is different than vision screenings.

“Keep in mind that a vision screening performed by your pediatrician or the school nurse is not a comprehensive eye exam. These screenings are designed to alert parents to the possibility of a visual problem, but not take the place of a visit to an eye care practitioner,” writes website senior editor Dr. Gary Heiting, OD. “Vision screenings are helpful, but they can miss serious vision problems that your eye care practitioner would catch.

Studies have found that up to 11 percent of children who pass a vision screening actually have a vision problem that needs treatment.

“Also, children who fail vision screenings often don’t get the vision care they need. Two studies published by the American Academy of Ophthalmology found that 40 to 67 percent of children who fail a vision screening do not receive the recommended follow-up care by an eye doctor.”

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STEP 1:

GET A MORTGAGE PRE-APPROVAL. AN ONLINE PRE-APPLICATION CAN TELL YOU IF YOU’RE READY TO BUY AND PROVIDE INFORMATION ABOUT YOUR PRICE RANGE, GIVING YOU A STARTING POINT FOR YOUR SEARCH. 40 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

“MORE PEOPLE CAN AFFORD HOMES THAN THINK THEY CAN.” —ALLISON PICKELL, GRI, ABR, SRS,

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41

DEMYSTIFYING THE MORTGAGE Tammy Tompkins, vice president and mortgage department manager at First Arkansas Bank and Trust

There are several loan types to choose from—FHA, VA, conventional and USDA-Rural Development—each with different availability details and down payment requirements, all of which FAB&T can handle. Payment assistance programs are available for qualifying buyers, and while for most programs there is not a difference for a first-time homebuyer, there are a couple of ADFA programs a first-time buyer may qualify for.

Most buyers are concerned with their credit score. We require a minimum credit score of 620 on our loans to be approved and meet our investor requirements.

We have an easy online application process at fabandt. com, which allows the borrower to make an application at any hour of the day that works for them. A big advantage of FAB&T is that we make all decisions on our loans in-house and don’t have to go outside for any additional approval on the majority of our loans. Under new management as of this year, we have worked to streamline and provide the most up-to-date services in the market. We are currently expanding our market area and can do a loan anywhere in the state of Arkansas.

LOCAL FINANCIAL LEADERSHIP

Amanda Herndon, corporate marketing director at Bank of England Mortgage, emphasized versatility and community engagement in your financial team. “Since 1898, we’ve been making homeownership dreams come true. We are locally owned, and our decisions are made locally.

Working with each client as an individual is what sets BOE Mortgage apart, whether you’re looking to purchase your first home, upsize/downsize your current home, refinance to save money every month, or find help with an unexpected event.”

BOE Mortgage’s involvement in Arkansas schools, Habitat for Humanity, Junior Achievement and others is a natural extension of their homegrown personal approach.

42 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

One of Fiser’s classic “front-porch living” home designs.

STEP 2:

FIND THE PERFECT HOUSE FOR YOU! HERE ARE SOME DO'S AND DON’TS. COURTESY OF ALLISON PICKELL

> DON’T JUDGE BY PHOTOS AND ONLINE LISTINGS ALONE. DRIVE

BY HOUSES; GET A FEEL FOR NEIGHBORHOODS TO FIND THE RIGHT FIT FOR YOU. > DON’T LOOK AT TOO MANY HOUSES IN ONE DAY. AFTER ABOUT FOUR HOUSES, THEY’LL ALL START TO BLEND TOGETHER, AND YOU’LL FORGET IMPORTANT DETAILS. > DO MAKE MULTIPLE VISITS TO A HOUSE BEFORE MAKING AN OFFER. MAKE SURE YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU’RE BUYING.

Make the Heights or

COULD A FISER COMMUNITY BE THE PLACE FOR YOU?

Hillcrest Home

Fiser Developments LLC/Salem Homes is setting the standard for community development in Saline County.

Fiser has designed two new neighborhoods, Creekside Cottages and the soon-to-open Olde Salem Township, with its signature “front-porch living” ethos—promoting interaction between neighbors in a safe, diverse setting with plenty of common space. “I think that people want to connect with one another and form close-knit communities,” said Yoni Johnson, Salem Homes realtor and daughter of builder/developer Dee Fiser. Both neighborhoods have a clubhouse, pavilion, swimming pool and two green-space parks, and in contrast to your typical “cookie-cutter” subdivision, they offer a variety of lot sizes

Allison Pickell, Realtor Recognized as Best Real Estate Agent

1501 N University, Ste. 800 Little Rock, AR 72207 501-920-2392 allisonpickell.com

“I THINK THAT PEOPLE WANT TO CONNECT WITH ONE ANOTHER AND FORM CLOSE-KNIT COMMUNITIES.” —YONI JOHNSON, REALTOR, SALEM HOMES and home designs to fit your needs. Both are located in the top-rated Bryant school district, right off I-30 and close to shopping and dining.

“Our neighborhood has been years in the making.

Dee and Masami Fiser did their research and visited communities across the U.S. before embarking on this adventure. As well as being the developer, Dee Fiser is also the builder. He builds beautiful, energy-efficient homes that stand the test of time,” Johnson said.

Fiser invites you to the grand opening of Olde Salem Township on Saturday, Sept. 17, from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.

Come out and tour the homes and neighborhood, enjoy refreshments and chat with financial pros about your home-buying questions.

LOCAL LENDERS LOCAL DECISIONS

Experience the difference of LOCAL service and LOCAL decisions.

If you are looking to purchase or refinance, contact us today.

Tammy Tompkins VP, Mortgage Dept. Mgr. 501.985.4043 NLMS# 1460652

Rhonda Clark Loan Officer 501.985.4058 NMLS# 509485

SaTonya Ford Loan Officer 501.850.8084 NMLS# 108946

Olde Salem Township

Donna Deen VP, Loan Officer 501.985.4063 NMLS# 509486

Wes Phillips Loan Officer 501.850.8012 NMLS# 1480473

www.fabandt.com | 501.985.4055

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

43

R

STEP 3:

2016 NPBR Realtor of the year

MAKE IT HAPPEN.

2016 NPBR President Over 10 year/Multi-Million Dollar Producer Staci Medlock

Multi-Million Dollar Producer CRYE-LEIKE Realtors 501-975-2100 (Office) 501-944-8687 (Cell) stacimedlock1@yahoo.com LIKE my PAGE on Facebook!

Front Porch Living

A Planned Community • New Homes for Sale

GRAND OPENING Saturday, September 17th 9am till 4pm 7581 Samples Road, Bryant

501-258-5101 | www.fiser.com 44 SEPTEMBER 2016 | THESAVVYMOMS.COM

“After you make an offer, you’re not done,” said Allison Pickell. You’ll want to get an inspection, and the house must be insured within 10 days of an accepted offer.

“Don’t just assume your normal insurance will cover your new home,” she said, "but do a little investigating to find your best premium."

Pickell emphasized the importance of keeping your nose clean, financially speaking, during the home-buying process. “A good realtor is going to make sure that someone is qualified before they start showing,” she said, and now isn’t the time to make any big moves that might affect that. Major purchases or changes, like with your job, bank or credit status, can wait until after you’re moved in.

"Your credit, the age of the house, past claims and driving record are the factors that affect your insurance premium," said Pryor Robertson of Farmers Insurance, which is growing into a new office space in 2018. “Here at Farmers, we reward clients for being claims-free with diminishing deductibles, for taking care of their finances with good-payer discounts, and for being loyal clients with things such as guaranteed renewal, incident forgiveness and accident forgiveness.”

INSPECTION COMPLETE

Hall Engineering Group offers a guaranteed thorough home inspection covering all areas of concern, including structure, roof and major systems, as well as other specialty inspections depending on your needs. “Our reports are over 20 pages long and include information about every area and system of the home,” said a Hall representative. “Pictures are included to make identification of repair items much easier. You can take our summary list of items needing repair straight to the seller within minutes. Our reports document the house so well that you can go back to it five and 10 years later to find out details about your home.”

“I WILL WORK HARD TO FIND THE PERFECT HOME THAT FITS YOUR NEEDS, NEGOTIATE YOUR CONTRACT, AND WALK YOU THROUGH THE ENTIRE PROCESS. I ENJOY HELPING PEOPLE AND LOVE SELLING REAL ESTATE. CALL ME ANYTIME. I’M ALWAYS AVAILABLE.” —STACI MEDLOCK, NORTH LITTLE ROCKBASED CRYE-LEIKE AGENT/CITY SERVANT

STEP 4:

BOTTOM LINE? SEEK ADVICE.

According to Allison Pickell, a good realtor isn’t just someone who shows homes, but acts as your counselor during the process, answering your questions and referring you to the right financial helper when the time comes.

“Interview your realtor; make sure they’re educated,” Pickell said, adding that accessibility is one of the most important qualities in an agent for those random questions that pop up. “With me, you can call 24/7.” With highquality expert consultants, you’ll be well equipped for the journey from a rental into your new house.

Helping reach dreams since

your

1898.

BOEArkansas.com Bank of England Mortgage is a division of Bank of England. NMLS 418481. Member FDIC.

ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW: HOME OWNER’S INSURANCE Pryor Robertson, Farmers Insurance and Financial Services > Don't skimp on coverage; get quotes on homes you’re serious about so that you can compare. Newer homes have better rates than older homes. > If you are buying an older home, find out the age of the roof and get documentation. Here at Farmers, we give discounts for new roofs. > Bundle your policies for the greatest savings. Your auto policy is the biggest discount you can get on a homeowner’s policy, but other policies like personal umbrella, life, boat or motorcycle policies also give you discounts. > Farmers offers affinity discounts to teachers, police, firefighters, scientists and other professionals: ask about these. > Ask if the home is in a flood plain. This will determine if you need flood insurance, which isn’t covered in your homeowner’s policy. > Understand that your insurance may not reflect the purchase price, but the reconstruction cost of the dwelling in the event of a loss. > Know the difference between ACV and RCV. Actual Cash Value means depreciation. Replacement Cost Value means that the item will be replaced at today’s cost.

THESAVVYMOMS.COM | SEPTEMBER 2016

45

bag check I HAVE THE BEST CLIENTS! THIS THANK-YOU NOTE AND GIFT CARD ARE FROM A CLIENT I RECENTLY WORKED WITH.

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