Volume 16 / Issue 61 / 2019
To Start a Relationship with Jesus Christ Admit you have sinned. “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Romans 3:23
L-R: Patrick, Delsey, Johnson, and Evelyn
MOMS EDITORIAL STAFF
Believe that Jesus is the only Savior. “I am the way the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” John 14:6
Editor: Evelyn Damian
Confess and leave your sin behind. Stop doing and thinking things that displease our Heavenly Father. “If we confess our sins ….” 1 John 1:9
Thank you for your financial help!
Invite Jesus to be your Savior and the Lord of your life. “Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God.” John 1:12 To continue growing in your relationship with Christ, have fellowship with other believers, read the Bible and pray.
Distribution: Johnson Li Cover & Layout: Patrick Tan Editorial Consultant: Delsey Garner
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Anonymous Christ the Great Shepherd Cynthia S. Rosales Amores Family Eric Pedroche Marikina Christian Fellowship
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Published quarterly by Asia Pacific Media Ministries. Unit 2608 Raffles Corporate Center, Emerald Avenue, Ortigas Center, 1605 Pasig City, Philippines. Telephone: 914-9767. E-mail: email@example.com. Reproduction of photos and articles is prohibited without permission. 2
From My Heart
Most mothers look forward to a time when they can take a break from their kidsâ€™ busy school life and get them involved in activities where they can learn new things. Recently, I met some people who had taken the opportunity to send their kids to youth camp. They were happy to see the positive results the camp had on their kids. We would like to share with you some of those stories in this issue. Evelyn Damian, editor
Table of Contents EDITORIAL
From My Heart 3 CHIKA-CHIKA
What Kids Need from Their Parents 4 Starting Over in the Philippines 5 WISE CHOICES
Why I Love Summer 6 MAKE A DIFFERENCE
Goodbye, Old Life! 8 FIGURATIVELY SPEAKING
Dance Your Way to a Healthy You! 12 Brown Rice Ilonggo Style 13 ANSWERS TO YOUR QUESTIONS
My Parents Involve My Children with Their Religious Practices 14 3
What Kids Need from Their Parents by Kim Snider
was sitting in the parlor not long ago having a pedicure, and next to me was a pretty 9-year old girl getting her nails done with her mother. She told me that her daddy and mommy didn’t let her go to a lot of places that she wanted to go, or do a lot of things she wanted to do. I explained it was because they loved her and wanted to protect her. She said, “I know.” Then, she said, “and my parents tell me how to act, too.” In this short conversation, the girl expressed three things children need: (1) to know their parents cherish them, (2) to know their parents will protect them, and (3) to know their parents will teach them how to behave through carefully thought-out discipline if needed. Cherish. A parent’s love is different from other people’s love for children because they are the ones primarily responsible for the emotional, mental and physical development of their child. That is why a parent’s love, although affectionate, is not indulgent. Effective parents do not always give their children what they want. When effective parents tell their children “no” they stand by their word and do not give in without a very good reason. Sometimes withholding what a child wants to do or have is the most loving thing a parent can do. Protect. A parent’s love also includes protection. Protection in our world today comprises more than just protection from disease or bad people. Protection now must include shelter from too much Internet, too much allowance, late bedtimes, too much time with the barkada. It must include insistence on homework completion, painful immunizations and vitamins, and home-taught lessons about budgeting and human
kindness. It should embrace prohibition of skipping school to hang out at the mall, and attendance at questionable parties. A parents’ protective love pushes children toward success in following the purpose for which God created that child. Correct. Finally, a parent’s love insists and teaches good behavior. This doesn’t mean just being polite or showing respect. It doesn’t mean just forcing a child to be quiet. God says good behavior is the following: to do justly, love mercy, walk humbly... (Micah 6:8) Additionally, good behavior denotes obedience to God’s standard of conduct contained in the Bible. This kind of obedience is “better caught than taught”, so an effective parent practices all the values and virtues they want their children to have. They model good behavior as well as enforce it. They purposefully correct their children when their children’s behavior does not measure up to these standards. Back in the parlor, our pedicure was finished. The little girl looked at me and frowned. “Now I have got to do my homework. I can’t even get on the Internet first, “ she said. Her mother looked at me and winked. “That’s right,” her mother replied. “God has a great future ahead of you, and I am doing my best to make sure it happens! That’s it, isn’t it? Recognizing that God does have a great future planned for each of our children and our job is to help it to happen!
Starting Over in the Philippines Tell me something about yourself. My name is Delsey Garner. I am married to a pastor and we have a teenage son. I was born and raised in Bacolod City, Negros Occidental. I finished my BS in Psychology from West Negros College, now known as STIWest Negros University. I completed a few masters level classes in guidance and counseling while I was working as a college guidance counselor at my college. I spent several years teaching at various grade levels, including pre-school, kindergarten and 3rd grade. I have been assisting my husband in ministry for the last 20 years, first was in Saipan, then in the U.S. and now in the Philippines. You lived in the U.S. for quite some time, why did you come back to the Philippines? Living in the United States would be considered a dream for a lot of Filipinos. Continued to page 13
Why I Love Summer by Reah B. Padla
ummer is just around the corner. Growing up, summer meant camp time! When I was a kid, I attended VBS camp every summer. One year, camp was a wonderful experience because it was then that I came to know God. Church youth camps are special because children can learn about God’s Word in fun ways. It is where one gets to spend time with old friends and meet new ones. During the camps I attended when I was younger, I learned more about my faith, grew deeper in the Word and nurtured friendships that I still keep to this day. You may be contemplating whether or not to allow your kid to attend a camp. I believe the pros outweigh the cons (getting homesick, being far from
home or in an uncomfortable environment with a rigid schedule, etc.) Church camps are significant because they offer the following benefits: LEARNING: A camp is usually themed, and the theme usually teaches positive values in a deep and meaningful way. An impactful camp I attended was for Sunday School teachers. I learned about the importance of children’s ministry, principles on how to be a more effective teacher and tips on how to care for children. It was during this camp I realized I wanted to help out in children’s church. RELATIONSHIPS: At camp, a person can meet people with the same interests and values. Spending so much
time together during a camp helps build friendships. Whenever I attended a camp with my best friends from church, we really bonded, we are now friends for life. COMMUNITY: Camps foster community. Life-long friendships can be formed and provide opportunity to meet mentors and coaches that can help shape their dreams and perspectives. In one youth camp, I remember hearing from a wise missionary on the topic of LCM (love/courtship/marriage), that the person you should pray for as your future partner should be one who loves God more than he loves you. I kept that prayer in my heart and became my principle as I waited for “THE ONE”. CREATIVITY UNLEASHED: A new interest or talent in music or art can be discovered at a camp, and kids nowadays have plenty of choices. I only got to attend church and leadership camps but my son who is presently 9 years old has tried sports, art and music camps. Even if the duration was short, 1-3 days, we were able to identify his strengths and weaknesses, as well as his new talents, skills and abilities. Now, he regularly does Taekwondo, learns to play
the piano and paints—all three hobbies started at summer camp. NO DISTRACTIONS: A young person can be stressed, so why not allow a few days or weeks of rest? A camp or retreat is one way to break free from the busyness of life. Imagine a few days or a week of no TV, telephone or smart phone. Attending a camp is a good way to teach children the value of time and simplicity. As much as adults need a digital detox, kids also need to be away from their gadgets and the internet. Camps will help them have discipline, patience and self-control because those mobile devices are usually not allowed for a given time. It is another reason I want my son to attend camps. NEW EXPERIENCES: Attending a camp is a great way to have new and unique experiences and beat the boredom of summer. A camp can be a perfect venue for your child to try activities and experience new stuff. DISCIPLINE: Summer camps are fun but also require discipline. They may require waking up early and follow rigid schedules. The fun and activities will help your child learn it is for their good. FINDING A GOOD CAMP: a) Get to know the organization managing the camp, the people that will look after your kids, and what safety and emergency precautions are in place. b) Research the purpose of the camp, its location, the schedule of activities, the reputation of the organization, and match it to the interests of your child. 7
by Graciela Faustino as told to Evelyn Damian
hated my Ate kasi favorite siya ng parents ko at well provided siya. Nagseselos ako sa kanya kasi by comparison, matalino siya at walang nami-miss na school activities. Lahat ng tours and field trips, lagi siyang kasama, dapat daw kasi. Ako siguro dalawa o tatlong beses lang naka-join ng ganyan. Ang isa pang napansin ko, ako ‘yung laging inuutusan. Si Ate, hindi kasi sakitin daw siya at mahina,” Graciela Faustino, called Ciela by her friends, tells her story. “Actually, pareho kami ni Ate na galit sa isa’t-isa. Galit siya sa akin dahil ‘pag nag-aaway kami, I make sure na masasaktan ko siya, kagat, kurot, sampal. Sa isip ko, “O para hindi ako lugi,” parang ‘yun na ang pinambabawi ko.” I remember a time na nag-away ‘yung barkada namin ni ate, sabunutan kami sa kalsada, sobrang away. Nang malaman ni Mama ‘yun, siyempre, galit na galit siya sa aming dalawa at pinagsabihan na huwag na sasama dun sa mga friends namin. Kapag dalawa naman kami ni Ate na nag-aaway, ako lagi ang pinagsasabihan ni Mama, sasabihin niya, “Ate mo yan e. Ciela has three sisters but they were not close to each other. They were closer to their own set of friends. “Hindi ako napalaki kung paano napalaki si Ate,” Ciela continues. “I grew up with my maternal Lola habang si Ate ay kasama nila Mama at Papa. Bata pa lang nagmumura na ako kasi ‘yun ‘yung kinalakihan ko kila Lola. Siguro naging concerned ang parents ko doon kaya kinuha nila ako kay Lola, kaya lang that time, I was like a pot na nahulma na. Ang tawag nga nila sa ‘kin taga-bundok,
walang manners, nangunguha ng gamit,” Ciela continues, “so they needed to break that part of me painfully. Binubugbog nila ako at naging normal na ang gamitan ako ng sinturon, walis, sabunot, kurot. Lagi kong naririnig sa kanila na bobo ako, walang alam. There were times na ikinukulong ako ng mga pinsan ko sa banyo, papatayin nila ‘yung ilaw at tatakutin ako. “Naaalala ko ikinukulong din ako ni Mama sa cabinet tapos katok ako ng katok pero walang nagbubukas. Merong times din na magigising ako na nakatali kasi makulit daw ako. Hindi ko na maalala kung ano’ng mga ginawa ko kung bakit ako pinaparusahan. So kung minsan isinosoli ako sa Lola ko, kukunin ulit tapos isosoli ulit, kukunin, isosoli. That was my childhood life. “Hindi nakatulong sa akin ang paraan nila ng pagdisiplina. I felt isolated. I felt that I needed to grow up on my own. I rebelled at napabarkada ako. “Noong nasa second year high school na ako, nagka-cutting classes ako at puro sports ang inaatupag. I was trying to live my own life. That time, kay Lola kami ulit nakatira kasama ang ibang relatives namin. Galit sa amin ang mga kaanak ni Lola dahil para sa kanila, pangdagdag lang kami sa gastos. Sinasabihan nila kami na pabigat, at mga walang kwenta. “Ganun lang ang takbo ng buhay namin until merong isang Pastor na nakilala si Lola. Nagpupunta siya sa bahay ni Lola para mag-Bible study. Since doon naman kami nakatira, kailangan kami mag-attend. Kami naman kunwari, tanggap kami, Amen, pero wala talagang tumitimo sa isip namin kasi devoted Continued to next page
MAKE A DIFFERENCE
kami sa aming religion. Then nagkaroon ng youth camp. May nag-sponsor sa amin ni Ate para kami maka-attend dun sa camp. It was December, 2007 at doon na nagsimulang magbago ang lahat sa buhay namin ni Ate. “Sa youth camp, first night pa lang, naiiyak na ko. Pero syempre hindi ko nakasanayan na nasa simbahan tapos umiiyak. Hindi kasi ako lumaki sa simbahan na may iyakan. Nakita ko sa youth camp ‘yung mga kabataan, nagluluhuran kahit hindi naman sinasabing lumuhod. Coming from a different religious background, ‘pag sinabing lumuhod ka, dun ka lang dapat luluhod at hindi rin naman nagtataas ng kamay dun. I thought, “May mga ganito palang nag-e-exist na mga taong naniniwala sa Diyos tapos nag-iiyakan sila.” That night, the Pastor shared with us how the Lord removed her from darkness tapos dinala siya sa liwanag. So ako nakaka-relate pero that night I told myself, “Solid ako, hindi ako iiyak, ang corny nito.” “On the second day, hindi pa rin ako bumigay, but on the third day, ‘yung preaching ng Pastor was very personal 10
Ciela (right) loves to bond with her ate.
and relational na. Nakita ko ‘yung dumi ng buhay ko, na I thought normal lang ang mabarkada, nag-i-smoke, umiinom kahit high school pa lang, kung minsan bago pumasok, nakainom na kami. ‘Yun ‘yung life na kinalakihan ko and then at that moment, suddenly it was all about God’s love, na tatanggapin ka Niya kahit makasalanan ka. He will change your life, ganun ang na-feel ko until hindi na ko solid sa dati kong religion. Bumigay na ko, lumuhod na rin ako, iyak na rin ako ng iyak, and I gave my all to Him. Tapos nagpa-participate na ako sa worship, nagsasayaw, nakikinig na ako sa preaching, hinahayaan ko ng maiyak ako. I felt na may freedom na ako talaga.” Ciela could not contain her joy as she traveled home with her sister. She says, “Pareho kami ni Ate na nabago sa youth camp na ‘yun. Nang pauwi kami, tulala lang ako. Alam mo ‘yung feeling ng na-in love ka for the first time at sinasariwa mo lang ang lahat ng nangyari? Totoo bang nangyari ‘yun. Totoo pala si God, grabe, ganon pala.” Ang saya-saya ko. Goodbye old life na talaga, wala ng galit, wala ng murahan, wala ng inuman, no more cigarettes.
“Pagbalik ko ng school nag-share ako sa mga classmates ko ng experience ko. Nawala sa isip ko ‘yung nakakahiyang mag-share ng Gospel. Ganun ‘yung impact sa akin ng nangyari sa camp. Sabay kami ni Ate naka-encounter kay Lord. Same thing din, nag-share din siya sa classmates niya. Marami kaming na-share-an na nagbigay ng kanilang life kay Lord. “‘Yun talaga ang turning point ng life namin. Naging closer kami ni Ate sa isa’t-isa. It just happened. Lagi na kaming nag-uusap, nag-she-share ng thoughts, nagdadamayan. Dati rin, hindi kami nakakapag-church dahil ‘pag week-end kailangan naming mag-trabaho kahit high school pa lang kami. But we decided na ‘yung Saturday and Sunday, hindi na kami magta-trabaho kasi pupunta kami sa church. We knew God would provide for our needs. So ‘yun, pareho naman kaming naging scholar hanggang sa nakatapos kami. Si Ate scholar pa rin hanggang sa MA studies niya. Ako rin nasa second semester na ng MA studies ko. God is really good.
“Noong una, hindi nagustuhan ni Mama ang pagbabago namin ng religion but later on, nakita niya kung paano kami inaangat ni Lord sa life namin. ‘Yung dati na wala talaga kaming makain, tapos ngayon meron na. Si Ate nasa college pa lang, siya na ‘yung nagbabayad ng rent ng bahay namin so na-amaze si Mama. “Kung dati na feeling ng mga relatives namin pabigat kami, binago ni Lord ang kalagayan namin. Ang sarap ng feeling na alam namin na it was God who made these things happen. Currently, nagtatrabaho ako as editor sa isang tutorial company na nagde-develop ng work books for tutorship. At the same time, nag-aaral ako sa Asian Theological Seminary, taking up MA in Pastoral Counseling. I am also a youth pastor of Church So Blessed. “May mga pagsubok pa rin sa buhay ko like, recently, nagkaroon ako ng bouts of depression, but I saw how my family stood by me at kahit na-depressed ako, it never crossed my mind to turn back from my faith. Talagang ang naka-set lang sa utak ko kailangan ko si God. I know He is faithful and He will see me through my situation and He did! “My family joined us in our faith. If God did not step in our life, we wouldn’t have a changed and restored relationship. But He healed the wounds in our heart and brought us hope, peace and joy. Now, we love and care for each other like never before. There are still a lot to learn but I know nandiyan lagi si Lord. Our God is amazing!”
Ciela (right) with her ate.
our bones stronger, therefore reducing the risk of osteoporosis.
Dance Your Way to a Healthy You! by Maria Rikka M. Ocena
’m not a good dancer. So when some of the women in our church invited me one Saturday morning to a Zumba session at a village park, I hesitated but went anyway to give it a try. After a few stretches and short runs around the oval, loud dance music signaled that the session was about to begin. My eyes grew wide as women started to gather. There were young ladies, mothers, and even senior citizens. Everyone was dancing to the tune, not minding the stiffness of their body, as long as they were lifting their arms, and stretching their legs. Dancing is one of the best ways to stay fit for people of different ages. According to Better Health Channel, Australia, one of the benefits of dancing is improving hearts and lungs. It also increases muscular strength, assists in weight management, and aids in making
Different dance styles can be used for exercise. Jazz is a high-energy dance which includes high kicks, leaps, and turns. Ballet is a classical dance focusing on strength, technique, and flexibility. Others have found ballroom dancing enjoyable especially for the “once young” since they are more familiar with swing, waltz, rumba and tango movements. However, vigorous and intensive steps have a high injury risk for bones, muscles, and tendons. Dance Instructor, Paul F. Clifford, suggests that you consult your doctor first if you have not exercised regularly for a long time, are overweight, and are over 40 years old. (Clifford, P.F (2000), Preventing Dance Injuries) It is helpful to choose the dance style that you will enjoy or try one that you think you can work on. There are several places you can begin dancing, like enrolling in a dance class, in a community hall or even at the comfort of your own home. Most fitness centers are now offering dance for their group exercise sessions. You may be surprised that one of the perks of enlisting at the women’s group in your neighborhood is getting a free dance workout every morning. It’s a challenge to see women finding time to exercise even in their busy schedule. Mothers need strong arms to carry a child and to do the laundry. Sturdy legs are necessary to run around the house to finish some errands before heading to the office. Incorporate dance into your daily routine, swing to the music while washing the dishes, or dangle to the tune while sweeping the floor and you’ll find yourself dancing to a healthy you!
I came back because my husband and I believe that God has called us to be here. My husband is now the director of Asia Pacific Media, Philippine office. Upon learning what Moms magazine is all about, I was moved to become a part of the editorial team. I am convinced that the magazine can help Filipino mothers by giving practical life lessons and encouragement through the articles they publish. I’m sure it was hard to leave your son to answer God’s call. How did you prepare for this? The hardest thing about answering this call was that we had to leave our son in the U.S. while he attended college, but God spoke to me through John 3:16. He gave up His one and only Son for me and because of that I feel I can give my son to Him. The greatest comfort is knowing that He loves our son more than we do. To prepare our son, we talked to him as much as we could about what God was laying on our hearts and asked him to help us pray for His direction. We were greatly encouraged when our son said,“ I am excited for you guys.” How did you help establish your son’s faith in God? First of all, we do our best to model our faith and obedience to God in front of our son. We take every opportunity to teach him about God. When we needed help or felt discouraged, we would pray and invite him to pray with us. We quickly express our thanks to God when we receive a blessing or an answer to prayer. We try to demonstrate what it means to be dependent on God. What message can you give to mothers who are facing challenges in raising their kids? God is generous in giving us wisdom when we ask for it. Everyday my husband and I pray for wisdom in our marriage, ministry and in raising our son. Being consistent is the key. If you haven’t established any standard in your home yet, start with ones that are simple and achievable and consistently apply them in your home. Praise your children more than you scold. Affirm their good conduct and they will know that you noticed and appreciate them. This will provide motivation for them to seek your attention through good behavior rather than by acting up. This will lead to more consistent obedience. If you are a wife and have children, your relationship with your husband is a bigger priority than your children. Raising your children will be easier if you and your spouse have a healthy relationship.
Just Asking with Peter Banzon
My parents want my little kids to spend summer with them but my husband and I are hesitant because my parents have a different faith and they get our kids to participate in their religious practices. I don’t want to hurt my parents’ feelings. What should we do?
he issue of differing religious convictions in a family is a sensitive one. You are raising your young children to embrace the same faith you and your husband share. So it is understandable why your husband does not want them to spend the summer with their grandparents that will expose them to religious ideas and practices you both do not hold to. Your children’s spiritual upbringing and religious instruction are yours and your husband’s primary responsibility, not their grandparents’. Being taken to religious services and activities that conflict with the faith they learned may create confusion in their young minds. Refusing your parents’ request will hurt and offend them. But you must respect your husband’s authority as the head of the family. On the other hand, if your parents will agree not to bring your kids to their religious events, then it may be reasonable to allow them to spend summer with their grandparents. Are you fully convinced that you hold to the truth of God and of Christ? Do you and your husband know the core basics of your faith? Are you investing time to familiarize yourselves with the teachings of the Bible? Are you purposefully inculcating the truths of what you believe and why you believe to your kids? A solid foundation is the best defense your kids will have against wrong beliefs and teachings. The Bible says in Proverbs 22:6, “Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” (NIV) 14
Volume 16 / Issue 61 / 2019
Youth Camp: A Way to Meet a New Friend | Moms Magazine 61