Equilibrium Magazine for Wellbeing, Issue 57 2015

MAGAZINE FOR WELLBEING

Issue 57

>> Wellbeing News Roundup >> London on Foot >>Positivity List >>Drug Issues >>Photography: Sara McCallum

2015

>> Art, Science & more

ISSUE 57

>> Ecotherapy: The Big Outdoors

Equilibrium Patron Dr Liz Miller Mind Champion 2008

Front cover image: Sara McCallum www.nonchalantly-devastated.com

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EQUILIBRIUM 2

editorial Hello and welcome to our new issue of Equilibrium! Whether you’ve just discovered our magazine for the first time, or are a loyal reader, we hope you enjoy this issue’s offerings. We’ve got some lovely new guest contributions, which we’re sure you’ll enjoy. Do keep them coming! We would love to hear your feedback; please do tweet us @teamequilibrium. If you’d like to join the editorial team, contribute an article, some art, photos or creative writing, please do get in touch via equilibriumteam@hotmail.co.uk.

Kate, Editor/Team Facilitator

disclaimer Equilibrium is produced by service users. Reproduction in whole or in part is strictly forbidden without the prior permission of the Equilibrium team. Products, articles and services advertised in this publication do not necessarily carry the endorsement of Equilibrium or any of our partners.

Equilibrium is published and circulated electronically four times a year to a database of subscribers; if you do not wish to receive Equilibrium or have received it by mistake, please email unsubscribe to equilibriumteam@hotmail.co.uk

the team Facilitator/ Editor: Kate Massey-Chase.

Editorial team: Dev, Ian, Nigel, Paul and Richard.

contact us Equilibrium, Clarendon Recovery College, Clarendon Road, London, N8 ODJ. 02084894860, equilibriumteam@hotmail.co.uk. We are in the office on Friday afternoons 2.30-4.30, but you can leave a message at other times and we’ll get back to you.

contributions Wanted: contributions to Equilibrium! Please email us with your news, views, poems, photos, plus articles. Anonymity guaranteed if required.

EQUILIBRIUM

3

London on Foot In early July, London experienced

more creative in my journey. It was a

the biggest tube strike in over a

beautiful summer’s day (not painfully

decade. Thousands of people had

hot like some of the days either side),

a terrible day, many giving up after

and my half an hour’s walk through

hours of travelling, abandoning their

Bermondsey from the station to the

journeys as a lost cause; buses termi-

school I was working in that day gave

nated half-way to their destinations,

me the chance to explore a bit of

spilling sweaty, frustrated commut-

London I’d never been to before. After

ers onto the pavement. I, however,

my job had finished, I chose not to

found a surprising joy in the absence

get the bus to my next appointment

of the tubes. Down in South London,

– as I luckily had time to spare – and

where we’re bereft of many tube lines

walked for almost an hour down the

anyway, I’m used to buses and trains,

Thames’ South Bank. It’s one of my

and the strike forced me to be even

favourite walks in London, and as I

Photo: Anthony

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Summer/ Issue 38

Kate Massey-Chase

ambled past Tower Bridge, London

with an important message about

Bridge, through Borough Market,

being present, being in the world

past the Tate, the Globe, down to

around you. I do sometimes feel

the National, BFI and Southbank

like a slave to technology, that

Centre, I felt so grateful, so gleeful,

need for constant ‘connection’,

to be an explorer in my own home,

updates – scroll, like, refresh, delete,

and so immersed in and part of the

reply, scroll, refresh. ‘Refresh, Kate,

city.

refresh’, the honeysuckle whispered to me, as I consciously spent the

Sitting on the tube, the bus, the

next two minutes with my face in

train – everyone’s heads are down.

it, enjoying the smell, enjoying the

Staring at the Metro, their phones,

reality, all the details of that little

the floor. It’s the ultimate Londoner

moment. Since that day, I’ve been

cliché. The other day I was walk-

trying to make a conscious effort not

ing from one of the places I work

to check my phone whilst I’m walk-

to the tube, through Parsons Green,

ing between places. Such a small

and I had my head down, scroll-

thing, but I keep having to check

ing through the emails I’d received

myself when I realise I’ve done it

in the last two hours whilst I’d been

without thinking. Likewise, on the

teaching. I was so absorbed in

tube/train, I find myself mindlessly

this seemingly essential activity,

scrolling through updates on my

I walked head first into a honey-

phone, rather than looking around

suckle bush. I almost laughed as

me or even reading the book I

I realised life was slapping me in

invariably have in my bag.

the face not just with flowers but

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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 5

On that sunny, chaotic day of indus-

genuinely annoying, but I do have to

trial action I made a commitment to

remind myself to keep some perspec-

myself to try and appreciate the city

tive. So, there are my commitments:

I pay so much to live in. We all have

perspective and awareness - being

busy lives and the horror of commut-

present when I’m walking (and pref-

ing around the city (particularly with

erably the rest of the time too!) and

the unreliability of South London trains)

trying to value the treasures all around

can make me irritable; I feel my blood

me in this city I call home.

pressure rise with every person who stands on the left on the escalator (gahhh!!!), pushes past me to get off

Feeling inspired?

the train, or walks too slowly in front of

Transport for London suggests beauti-

me. Who knew I even had so much

ful and interesting walks that can be

anger in me? All these things are

found all across Central and Greater

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Summer/ Issue 38

London. Check out their website for

St Paul’s to Buckingham Palace, and

more information about these routes:

includes Bloomsbury and the City on the

https://tfl.gov.uk/modes/walking/top-walking-routes?intcmp=2424

way.

Capital Ring

Lea Valley

A walk through London’s greenest

A glimpse into Britain’s industrial past,

suburbs, this 78-mile route is divided into

the path follows the 18 miles along the

15 shorter walks, including Richmond

Lee Navigation towpath, from Waltham

Park, Wimbledon Common and Eltham

Abbey to the Thames at Limehouse

Palace.

Basin.

Green Chain A network of straight and circular walks

London Outer Orbital Path (LOOP)

across South East London, the route

The London Outer Orbital Path, or LOOP,

takes in dozens of woods and parks, as

almost completely encircles Greater

well as the Thames Barrier and Crystal

London. Nearly 150 miles are split into

Palace.

24, bite-sized walks.

Jubilee Greenway

Thames Path

Celebrating the Queen’s Diamond Jubi-

A 40-mile stretch of easy, level walk-

lee, this path for walkers and cyclists

ing on both sides of the river, the path

links the Olympic and Paralympic

stretches from Hampton Court Palace

Games venues, including the O2 Arena,

through the heart of London to East India

Greenwich Park and the Serpentine.

Dock.

Jubilee Walkway This route, created to celebrate the Queen’s Silver Jubilee, encompasses London’s most iconic landmarks, from

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 7

Positivity List for ‘Upmooding’ Nigel Prestatyn

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Summer/ Issue 38

One of the drawbacks of writing lists

We often worry about all the things we

about positivity is that people expect

haven’t got, or haven’t achieved, when

you to be ridiculously positive; in addi-

it would be far more productive to take

tion to that, because I have written it, I’m

a moment to consider all things we have

expecting myself to be ever positive. It

got, and have achieved.

reminds of a story of a leading NLP practitioner who was giving a conference over

3. Mistakes are there for a reason. The

three days, and on the third day he was

amazing thing about Mistakes, or fail-

seen getting out of his car, with that unde-

ures, is that they are there to teach us so

niable expression of someone in deep

much. We know instantly not to go there

depression. This was prior to him finding

again. How many ‘failures’ did Edison

a new route of self help. Well, it doesn’t

make before he discovered the light

matter who you are, negative thoughts

bulb? Well, firstly they are not failures.

and feelings will always creep in. That’s

Edison regarded each ‘failure’ as ‘steps’

just life. Given that, there is no reason a list

to achieving success: the discovery of the

for staying positive can’t act as a healthy

light bulb.

reminder of things to do: 4. What you read or watch can negaSo this is my list:

tively affect you. So keep away! Now no one wants to be accused of sticking their

1. Expect good things in your day. Expect-

heads in the sand. But too much nega-

ing good things in your day and it will be

tive news, day in day out, can bring your

more likely that they arrive. Of course

mood down. Picking up a paper can liter-

the inverse is true: look for the negatives

ally be soul destroying. Do you listen to

things in your day, and they will also be

the news or read a paper? Know this, they

more likely to appear.

are invariably filled with death, destruction, crime and how bad the economic

2. Wake up with an attitude of gratitude.

situation it. Keep away, or filter wisely.

There is a reason this little saying is thrown all over the shop. It’s sound advice.

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

5. You are the composite of five of the

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 9

closest people you hang around with.

8. Read self-help books. Reading books

What does this tell you? Who are you

on self-help can be great, or not! It

socialising with? Some it’s worth consider-

depends on what you choose and how it

ing, if you’re attaching yourself to nega-

resonates with you. But you won’t know if

tive people this will have an effect on you.

it’s beneficial until you’ve read it. But there

If you attach yourself to positive people,

are some amazing books out there, filled

this will also have an effect on you. The

with incredible personal stories of how

lesson here? Choose your friends wisely!

individuals have managed to stay positive in the face of immense adversity. And

6. Take control of you life. Sit down and

great thoughts and understanding about

consider what are the things that appear

keeping a positive state of mind.

troublesome in you life and seriously consider writing a plan to deal with these

9. Exercise is good for the soul. Yes, exer-

issues. It maybe that a little concise strat-

cise can keep you positive. It is scientifi-

egising can help alleviate one stress. So

cally proven that thirty minutes of good

try doing some mind mapping on a piece

exercise can release chemicals that can

of paper to see what surfaces.

lift your mood and give you a more positive outlook.

7. Try reframing for a more positive glow.

It can often be the case that adjusting

10. Indulge yourself once in a while. Treat

the way you perceive things can make

yourself. Why wait for someone else to

a world of difference. Reframing involves

do it for you? In fact they may never do

taking something quite negative and thing

it for you, in which case you’ll be waiting

about it in a more positive light. Now this is

a long time! So consider what your little

not a Pollyanna thing. It means having an

indulgence would be, that moment of

clear objective overview of situation and

personal pampering or luxury? And make

seeing it for what it really is. So my motor-

a pact with yourself to do it often and

bike is knackered. But I’m getting to do far

regularly.

more cycling and feel far healthier for it.

EQUILIBRIUM 10

PHOTOGRAPHY: SARA MCCALLUM

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CORNWALL 2015

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TREYARNON BAY

Summer/ Issue 38

Equilibrium’s Nigel Prestatyn hotfoots it to Cornwall to capture these stunning panoramic views

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EQUILIBRIUM

ARTWORK

(f) (a)

Clarendon Group

(c)

(g)

This time I’m not reviewing one but many

for the sky in the background… You could

different artists and I must say I’m truly

literally dive in to the picture, the boats are

enthralled by the wide array of pictures to

so close you could almost reach out and

look at.

touch them. And then there is the turbulent sea, captured with light and dark so effi-

Firstly, I have to say that I am impressed

ciently. I’m at the seaside having a picnic;

by the tribal feel (a); you could say it’s like

the light blues mixing with greens, greys

looking at American Indian or even aborig-

and just a hint of yellow gives a light view

inal art. The choice of colours is striking and

over what is a tense view of a turbulent

eye catching; you could even go so far as

sea. Well done – I’m totally hooked. You’ve

to say it looks like an Islamic prayer mat:

got skillz, Gary. It has re-inspired me, thanx

beautiful reds and yellows, with pale blue

mate.

that complements itself with natural tones and intricate details. Well done, John.

Now for the next piece of art (c). I know block colours when I see them, and I

The next picture (b) brings me back to my

grew up watching Rainbow on TV! Dawn’s

early artistic years when I used to draw and

colourful rainbow is bold and beautiful and

paint scenic landscapes. I am looking at

she has even offset it with hints of grey. It

a sea picture and the brush strokes have

blurs the boundaries of their endings, with

truly captured a storm at sea: the wind in

two meeting in the middle and exploding

the sails, the perfectly used, limited colour

in a turbulent sea of colour.

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Summer/ Issue 38

(b)

(a)

(e)

(e) (a)

(d)

Neil has a thing for shapes and one of the

varied simplicity. He has moulded a face

most well known is the pyramid (d), the

paper on paper through collage, and

triangle. Really unusually he has decided

the blue hair and dark beard offset one

to colour it in with pencil both lightly and

another perfectly. You can’t forget the

darkly and just to give you a little extra

advertising. That’s rep, man – thanks,

with two clouds one each side. Less is

David!

more. Simple.

Now Miranda gives an eye of zaniness to Dev’s picture (e) is a top half portrait of a

one of my favourite activities (g), for when

person whose arms are folded and is star-

I’m at play I love rollercoasters and this

ing right at you. This picture really grabs

one really tests gravity to the limits by the

you and draws you into the eyes.

looks of it. There’s lots of intricate details in all the individual people in the cars and

Denica’s work (e) is of a beautiful bright

the queue, and let’s not forget the seesaw.

bird standing on top of a pot. The bird’s

Your picture is beautiful, Miranda.

legs remind me of an albatross and she has even called it ‘Bird of Paradise’. That

Richard Honan

sums it up perfectly.

(aka mohecan raphecant touché punt lsd cara2che dtf d2t kudos da living pugilist).

Now the face I’m looking at (f) is really back to basics, creatively unique in its www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 15

Languages

By Dev

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 16

In an increasingly multi-cultural

English Dictionary has recently

world where around a half of

added new words from other

the population speak more

languages into their diction-

than one language, and in

ary. For example, the updates

some cases several languages,

includes many words from

words tend to migrate into

Philippine English, such as new

other languages. This is what

senses of common English

makes languages grow and

words, like ‘gimmick’ to mean

evolve. It is said that the Oxford

a night out with friends; loan-

Summer/ Issue 38

words from Spanish, like ‘estafa’ meaning

more common in speech than writing). If

‘fraud’; and Tagalog, such as ‘barkada’

you go into the midlands they sometimes

meaning ‘group of friends’. This also goes

say their vowels differently, and in the north

for English entering dictionaries of other

of England in Newcastle some people

languages. For instance, the words televi-

speak with a Geordie accent. Scotland,

sion, socks, camera, laptop, books all

Ireland and Wales all have very distinct

appear in many of the world’s languages.

accents.

Languages, or the way they are spoken,

In the Indian Subcontinent people tend

can change depending on where you

to speak in two languages at the same

live. If you travel to another part of your

time. This is known as Benglish (Bengali

city, you may find that people speak the

and English) or Hinglish (Hindi and English).

same language but in a different accent.

Basically you use words both from English

A prime example is if you start your jour-

and the other language at the same time.

ney in Chelsea they may speak English but

This is mainly spoken by people under 27

with a ‘posh’ accent; as you move down

years old and above 12 years old. These

to central London or the city of London

are often used so that adults do not under-

the way words are spoken change. Move

stand what they are saying.

even further east into the East End you might hear people speaking in cockney or

In some countries there are at least two

missing a few letters from their words. Some

or more main languages spoken. But,

people also use a lot of slang (a type of

according to K-internation blog, the Tiny

language consisting of words and phrases

Papua New Guinea is about 462,840

that are regarded as very informal and are

square kilometres in size (about the size

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 17

of the state of California) and there are

bit differently. For example, in Arabic

about 820 spoken languages in that

some words also appear in Urdu (a

country alone! That is about a quarter

language spoken in Pakistan and North

of the 6,912 known living languages

West India). Urdu has some of its words

spoken in the world today. Accord-

appearing in Hindi (one of the two main

ing to the Effective Language learning

languages spoken in India). If you keep

website the most difficult languages to

on following this example you will find it

learn are Arabic, Japanese, Mandarin

goes around the world.

and Korean.

As a person who can speak three Apparently the first words were just

languages (Hindi, Bengali and English,

sounds and clicking noises which were

and I also speak some Urdu as it is very

done by the hunter gathers. This type of

similar to Hindi), I have had some trou-

early language is still spoken in hunter-

ble writing the languages I speak. I try

gathering tribes in extremely rural areas

to get the gist by understanding what is

and the Sahara. The majority of writ-

going on in the situation, as the context

ten words developed from the pictorial

of the words help with their meaning.

images. For example the letter A came

When I first started learning one of the

from the image of a cows head.

languages, I tried to learn the basic greetings, then followed on picking up basic words like is, there, the, why. Then gradually the names of things i.e. cup, chair, salt, table, followed by putting

Languages have been described

words together. Sometimes if you watch

as: “free spoken words which gradu-

foreign children’s programmes this can

ally change in pronunciations as you

help a lot, and I have managed to learn

move across the world”. As you move

some Arabic words this way. As I am a

across different countries similar words

dyslexic person, this took some time.

appear, but are often pronounced a

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 18

Summer/ Issue 38

PHOTOGRAPHY: SARA MCCALLUM

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 19

GREEN THERAPY Wellbeing & the Big Outdoors

I have to confess to having never heard of

in 71 percent of participants. Research-

the term ‘Ecotherapy’, also referred to as

ers compared the effect on this group with

‘Green therapy’, but it seems natural that

a control group who also took a walk, but

the wellbeing benefits of being in the great

in a shopping centre. Only 45 percent of

outdoors would eventually get its own title.

the shopping center walkers had reduced

Of course we all know that getting some

depression, while 22 percent of them actu-

fresh air and being in the great outdoors is

ally felt more depressed. So there are sound

good for us, but for many, knowing that it

statistics to back up the benefits of being in

now comes with research credentials, may

the great outdoors.

give potential couch potatoes an additional boost in getting out into the big green world.

There are more terms in fact, this time related to the effect on one’s mood in not

A recent study conducted by research-

getting out into nature, and that is Nature

ers from the University of Essex, found that

Deficit Disorder, coined by American author

taking a walk in nature reduced depression

Richard Louv in his book, The Nature Princi-

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 20

Summer/ Issue 38

Nigel Prestatyn

ple. Of course it’s hard to know what exactly

green activities like gardening or environ-

getting out into nature means. Well, yes, out

mental conservation work. The organization

into a park if you’re an urbanite like me. But for how long? How much nature would there need to be? Would a fairly green garden

has found that 69 percent of people had an increased sense of well-being after participating.

count as nature? Well, gardening by all accounts is very beneficial for some in terms

These studies might help the stubborn who

of lifting mood, or seeking a little tranquillity.

scream: ‘when do I get time to go out into

Another study published in 2010 in the Jour-

nature, I’m far too busy with work?!,’ etc.

nal of Environmental Psychology showed that spending even just 20 minutes outside per day could boost energy levels. Mind has funded several “Ecominds” projects that

Well you don’t have to, you could always stay in a low mood. It really is up to each individual to make the time and effort.

bring people at risk of developing mental

Twenty minutes is not such a big cut from 24

health problems to become involved in

hours, giving the benefits we now know.

EQUILIBRIUM21

Yoga and Recovery Francesca Baker

Recovery from mental illness and

When experiencing any mental illness

addiction is a process – one of

it can be difficult to even contemplate

rebuilding a life, harnessing resources,

dragging yourself to a mat to engage

connecting with the self and finding

in any exercise, and the mind will no

meaning. It’s unfortunately not some-

doubt be racing away from it even

thing which can occur as a result of

once you are there, but this is all part

just a course of tablets and a doctor’s

of the process. Yoga is not a magic

appointment, and treatment which

wand or an instant fix, but the prac-

adheres to such a rigid definition often tice consists of tiny changes which has a narrow and short lived result.

together will not in itself alter your life,

There is an increasing recognition that

but can alter your attitude to life, the

recovery requires hope, control and

tools you use to cope with difficult

opportunity and that these things can

situations, the approach you take to

be found outside of the mainstream

daily activities, and thus, in all of this,

medical catalogue. They can be

be life changing.

found in yoga.

Around the world practitioners are

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 22

Summer/ Issue 38

starting to realise the power of

for yoga and addiction. Concentra-

yoga in recovery. It has a tool to

tion enables individuals to develop

help deal with life and connect

emotional regulation and over-

with oneself, but more formal

ride learned behaviours, with a

programmes explicitly aligned with

particularly powerful effect on the

recovery are cropping up. In the US

dopamine system, the feedback

Nikki Myers has set up a movement

loops of which are often found to

called Y12SR, aligning together

be skewed in those with addictions.

yoga with the traditional twelve step

Her practice is therefore delivered

programme, whilst closer to home

from an informed space, and she

Camilla runs classes and retreats

works with individuals to highlight

in Brighton and London ‘aimed

the aspects of practice which medi-

at anyone who may be currently

ate the condition. A compassionate

experiencing challenges in life

approach to discomfort reduces

that have left you feeling out of

struggle and trauma, and yoga has

balance’.

been found to have been as effec-

It’s not just a case of yoga making

tive as antidepressants (although do

you ‘feel better.’ There’s clear

speak to your doctor if considering

evidence to support the use of yoga

coming off any medication).

for recovery. Shaura Hall of Yoga

The Yoga Project run specific

Love trained with the Mindfulness

courses and classes for those recov-

Institute, and unites her scientific

ering from long term illnesses and

background with yoga practice.

addictions. They state how ‘recovery

Her knowledge of neurobiology led

from any addictive or compulsive

her to really explore the evidence

behaviour shares the same aims as

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM 23

yoga: a quest for self-control, disci-

most important things in recovery is

pline and strength’. It’s a point shared

connecting together the emotional,

by Alan Marlett, who set up the Mind-

cerebal, social and physical parts of

fulness Based Relapse Prevention

one’s life to create meaning. Addic-

Centre and has noted that through

tion is often a result of having lost

building resilience, acceptance and

some kind of connection with either

understanding researchers have

oneself or community, and replacing

already found that yoga helps people

this with something else. Empower-

accept the negative emotions and

ment and belief in one’s own ability

physical cravings that so often lead to

to create real and lasting change is

a relapse.

crucial in recovery. It’s a rewarding

Durga Leela runs Yoga of Recovery, a

and wholesome moment when you

yoga retreat that uses the twelve step

notice that your heels touch the floor

principle of recovery, which looks

in downward dog, or you can stretch

at the roots of addictive behaviours

just a little further in triangle pose. No

through the 6 Tenets of YoR – Life is

one has made that happen, just your

Longing (union), Prana (vitality), Rela-

own practice and belief.

tionship (belonging), Sweet (beauty),

Everyone is individual; the practice

Love (true Power) and Progress (direc-

of yoga is accepting of that and

tion and guidance). Her approach

encourages individuals to accept

is spiritual and her focus on chan-

themselves. There’s no judgement

nelling consciousness, but with the

– just you and the mat – which is an

same effects taking place upon the

incredibly liberating place to be in.

body. When the prana energy of the

Imperfections are not criticised, but

breath is balanced, the sympathetic

embraced as part of what makes

and parasympathetic systems are in

people unique. Yoga won’t make

balance.

the issues that have led to addic-

Yoga means union, and one of the

tive behaviours go away, but it will

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 24

Summer/ Issue 38

create the space to explore and

moving through the postures – the

accept them. Shuara notes how the asana – that is beneficial for recovdiscomfort of some yoga positions

ery, but the language of yoga.

can be seen as trials that replicate

Phrases such as ‘wherever you are

those in life, and learning to deal

today, ‘that’s enough’, ‘just work

with them an important lesson.

to what you can’ and ‘maybe you

The space to connect with all

can go further, maybe you can’t

aspects of your being, the physi-

today’ are at odds to the harder,

cal, mental, emotional and spir-

faster, stronger mantras that seem

itual, and allow whatever comes

to repeat through most exercise

up to just come up can feel chal-

classes. The kind of questions

lenging for individuals so used to

that come up in yoga are about

numbing, fighting or running from

being curious, rather than finding a

difficult emotions, but is a very

cause and blame, and encourage

healing process to go through.

a playful and enjoyable process

Releasing some of the emotional

of change. I don’t come out of a

trauma that is stored in our energy

yoga class angry at my limitations

and body means that there is less

and what I have achieved, but

of an urge to ‘treat’ it through mala- instead proud that I have taken the daptive means. It’s a way for to

time to tune into my own body.

get ‘in touch with one’s own Self

‘Come back to the breath’ is the

and develops the right perspec-

phrase used most often in yoga.

tive about life, becoming deeply

Come back to the one thing you

contented no matter what is

always have, without seeking any

happening externally’. As Durga

external behaviour, substance or

describes it: ‘This is tremendous

routine. Come back to yourself.

healing’.

Really, that’s what recovery is all

It’s not only physical practice of

about.

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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 25

‘BECOMING’

A Computer Game For Health

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 26

Summer/ Issue 38

Nick Chester

At Last, a Computer Game is on Its

within a psychiatric ward. The game

Way that Provides a Realistic Depic-

will be an RPG that takes the player

tion of Mental Illness by Nick Chester

deep inside the brain of the central character via dream and memory

Have you ever played a computer

sequences, and enables him or her

game that features a mentally ill

to participate in therapy sessions

character and found yourself roll-

and interact with other ward resi-

ing your eyes at how unrealistic it is?

dents. I caught up with Isaac to

Mental health is usually portrayed in

find out his motivation for creat-

terms of either cartoon-style ‘insan-

ing this game, and how it aims to

ity’, complete with cackling evil

change the face of mental illness in

laughter and plans to take over

computer games.

the world, or zombie-like braindeadness, with the individual in

Me: What inspired you to start devel-

question being incapable of any

oping this game?

form of rational thought. There is rarely any attempt to evoke empa-

Isaac: I’ve wanted to be a computer

thy for these characters, or depict

game developer since I first played

them as they are in the real world.

Super Mario Bros. as a little kid,

Fortunately, budding game devel-

and I’ve been in and out of psyche

oper Isaac Benjamin is seeking to

wards since I was a young teen. The

change this situation. He’s currently

last time I was in one, I was about

working on a title that is aimed at

18 years old. I’m inspired by story-

realistically simulating the struggles

driven games, like Dear Esther and

of people with mental health issues

The Stanley Parable, and when

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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 27

I thought about the types of game

Me: What has the response to your

I wanted to make, I decided that I

ideas been like so far from people?

wanted to create something meaningful. It seemed logical for me to make

Isaac: I’ve had a good response;

a game about mental illness, because

people definitely seem to like them. I

there really wasn’t anything that

haven’t had any negative responses,

depicted it realistically in the game

so that’s good.

industry.

Me: Do you think Becoming has potenMe: Your game explores the thought

tial for teaching people about mental

processes and the dreams of the char-

illness as well as just functioning as a

acters as well as the physical world

game?

that they exist in. Can you say a bit about that?

Isaac: Yeah, I really hope so. I also hope that it’ll provide a cathartic

Isaac: I want to implement a day and

release for people who have mental

night cycle in which the player has to

illness. I hope it’s something that

go to bed at night and wakes up in

people can play to gain an insight into

other locations, which are either repre-

the world of mental illness.

sentations of the past or dreams. The main level I like to tell people about is

Me: What’s your background as a

a level where the floor and walls move

game developer? Have you made

based on player movement, which is a

other games before, or is this the first

way to display through metaphor how the

that you’ve worked on?

world can get in the way of the player.

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 28

Summer/ Issue 38

Isaac: I’ve got high standards for

Isaac: I hope that I’ll be finished

the games that I release. I haven’t

within five years, although that’s just

released any others so far, because

the vague ballpark.

games need to be of commercial

Me: Where will people be able to get

quality for me to I release them.

hold of Becoming?

I’ve been studying game design for about 2 years now through online

Isaac: I’m hoping to have a demo

learning platforms like Udemy and

level up in a handful of months,

Digital Tutors, but this is going to be

and I definitely plan on selling the

my first commercial title.

game before it’s finished as an early access release. I’m not really sure

Me: The clips of Becoming that I’ve

where I plan on hosting that; I might

seen look very professional for some-

just host it on my own website. I defi-

one who hasn’t released a game

nitely plan on releasing the game

before!

on Steam [a digital game store] and GOG [a game distribution service]

Isaac: Thank you; that’s kind of the

when it’s done.

whole point. I wanted people to see the first thing I made and go, ‘Hey,

Me: Thanks, Isaac. I’ll look forward to

this guy knows what he’s doing’, not

playing it when it’s out.

‘This guy just started out’.

For further information about BecomMe: When do you hope to have it

ing, search for Isaac’s game produc-

finished by?

tion company No Audible Dialogue on Facebook or YouTube.

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 29

A Can of Snakes & a Kettle of Nightmares The global ‘war’ on drugs

HIGH SOCEITY I am of the opinion that a fresh

law makers have mimicked truth with

perspective is required in order to

false hegemony. Their self righteous

tackle what could destroy a decent

approach, like they are on the moral

civilised society if we continue the

high ground, suggests the way to deal

way we are going. We will soon reach

with your body and mind is in their

a point where all these politicians and

nihilistic design of neoliberal capital-

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 30

Summer/ Issue 38

ism, where people are secondary

perhaps we should have access to

to profit and trade. The only ‘isms’ I

that which is required; for example

personally believe in are monothe-

doctors and dentists and the medi-

ism, antidisestablishmentarianism

cal world are free to use drugs on

and altruism.

us and there is no recrimination, whereas if you are caught using

The trade of illegal drugs has a reve-

a controlled substance you are

nue of near a billion, and when law-

labelled a criminal, even though lots

makers are making their decisions

of evidence that suggests that mari-

it’s self-evident that they’ll be influ-

juana can be highly effective for

enced by money. The use of legal

relief from some medical conditions.

drugs, such as nicotine and alcohol,

Why are we criminalising people

pulls in huge revenue in taxation,

who are desperate?

and this has been used as an argument for the legalisation of some

Yet we must remember: the scale

drugs. However, here we are again

of the global drug trade problem is

bringing it all back to money rather

pandemic and totally out of control,

people: more concerned about fat

ruining millions of lives. If we are to

pockets than wellbeing.

come up with a sensible solution that has everyone’s best interests

I suggest we look to the reality of

at heart, the only way forward is to

people’s lives. On the one hand,

work together with one aim in mind:

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EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 31

purity of both mind and body, where

to highly addictive substances and

possible. So, in my humble opin-

end up losing dignity and respect. In

ion: don’t do the crime if you can’t

my humble opinion, with my limited

deal with any possible outcome

but varied experience, I believe that

that might not be agreeable with

we desperately need to change our

your individual biological chemical

attitude towards assisting the vulner-

make up (and you can’t know that

able in society. We definitely need

in advance!). You might be suscep-

an altruistic rather than judgemental

tible to problems that could arise

attitude and to get our heads out of

from substance use and not just an

the clouds and treat all substances

adverse reaction; for example, it

with the attitude and caution they

has been suggested there are links

deserve. This is a complex issue and

between cannabis use and schizo-

we need to be careful not to delib-

phrenia. There is also the possibility

erately demonise or legitimise what

of addiction with any drug (and let’s

could destroy us as individuals, as

not forget alcohol is a drug too!) and well as our society, both local and addiction is a serious sickness.

global.

We are paying a high price on both

Richard Honan (aka mohecan raphe-

sides of the coin; the justice system

cant touché punt lsd cara2che dtf d2f)

is not (or at least rarely) caring, aiding, healing or assisting the poor people who are susceptible

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 32

Summer/ Issue 38

PHOTOGRAPHY: SARA MCCALLUM

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 33

Photography: Sara McCallum