ADiary of NoConsequence
Inthedustyatticofa dustyhousewasfounda treasuretroveofmany things.
Some,wondrous,others strange,excitingandexotic, manyarenotcomfortableto touchbuthaveabeguiling innocence.
Oneofthoseartifactswe havehere.Aseriesofshort memories,thoughtsand recollectionsgivingaview
intothemindofanunknown andforgottenhead.
Besidethiswasavast arrayofeclecticmusic.We havetakenthelibertyof compilingaselectionof theseformidablelibraries andpresentthemforyour perusal.
WelcometoTheDiaryof NoConsequence..
Outro
Therewehavetoleavethe intriguingdiarycontentsof someonewedonotknow.
Fascinatingatitiswe cannothavetoomuchintrigue ordeepphilosophicalthought inonesitting-orstanding.
Wemustleavetimefor everythingtobedigested, understood,debatedand broughtfurtherintothe
publicconscience,andof course,getonwithourdaily lives.
Iamofftoacharity bingonightinthelocalhall. Ihavemyluckydabber whichIfoundinthatdrawer inthekitchen.Theonethat haseverythingandnothingin it.
Wewillbebackagainvery soontobringmorefromthe DiaryofNoConsequence.
Imadeatriptoseea Haberdasheryesterday.I’m nottoosureoftheservices sheprovidesbutneverhaving haberdashedmyself,thought shecouldbethebestoption todealwithmyongoingscarf crisis.
Ihaveadraftcomingdown throughthefronthallwayad haveadoptedascarfwhen thesituationdemandsit.
Sometimesitfitsasifit wereaglovebutoccasionally itistootight.
TheHaberdashersaidshe coulddonothingformebut thatherbrotherisa carpenter.Ithankedher, badehergoodbyeandleft somewhatconfused.
Whatcouldajoinerknow aboutscarves?
Afewdaysagoaladyin thePostOfficequeue mentionedshehadhadher hairdonerecently.Iam unusedtosuchterminologyso simplyrepliedsayingitwas niceandlookedexpensive.
Iwasonlybeingpoliteand makingconversation,Icould nottellonewayorthe other.
Ihavesinceseenother womenlookingsimilarand fearImayhavesomehow nurturedanewtrend.I’m notsureI’mreadyforthat kindofjourneyandthe inevitableresponsibility.
Iwillinfuture,avoid suchtrickysituationsorif forcedwillusemorevague terms.
Imadeaterriblemistake inthenewsupermarketthe otherday.Iboughtbiscuits thatIdon’tlike.
Theyweredisguisedin packagingverysimilartomy favourites.However,the contentsaretoodrywith littleinthewayofcrumble. Icannoteatthem.
AsIalwayshaveacup ofteawithabiscuitI’m
nowconcernedaboutmy liquidintakeandpotential dehydration.
I’munsurewhattodo,I maysimplyabandonthe biscuitpretendersonthebus andgobacktothelittle shoponthecorner.It’snot asradicalasotherlarge shops.
OnTuesday,asalways,I hadteaandcakeatmy friendSheilas’house.Sadly, thisarrangementmayhave toend.Shehasan infestationofmice.
Ihavesaidnothingas yetbuthavetakento tuckingmytrousersintomy sockswhenvisiting.
Whilstthisplanworksand mykneesarerodentfree,
sofar.Itdoes,however, makemefeelquiteselfconsciouswhenwalkingto herhouse.
Icouldresorttobicycle clips,borrowmy8yearold nephewscycleandwheelit toherbackdoor.Ican’t rideabicyclebutitwould explaintheclips.
Idon’twanttomissher LemonDrizzle.
Wednesday18th
Itookastrolldowna neighbouringstreetlast night.Itwasagainstmy betterjudgementbutIlost myownargument.Ishould neverhaveundertakensuch ataskwithoutproper planning. Ihaveaslightcoldand whilemoppingupavery dampnose,thewindcaught myhankieandblewitout ofreach.
Itisnowaffixed,quite stubbornly,ontheTVaerial ofNumber26.Neverhaving metanyoftheresidents thereIfeltittoo impertinenttoknocktheir door.
Thankfullytheoffending clothhasnoinitialsonitso Icannotbetraced,other thanbyDNA. HoweverIwillbeavoiding thatstreet,forever,justin case.
WhilecollectingmyRailway periodicalfromthe newsagentInoticedhis trouserlegswereveryshort. IpretendedIsawnothing untowardandremainedmy usualpoliteandsociable self.But,therewasfartoo muchsockondisplay,It mademefeelquite uncomfortable.
Itmay,ofcourse,beall thefashionthesedaysbut I’mnotaufaitwithsuch things.
Isimplycollectedmy changeandleftwitha forcedbutcheerfulgoodbye inanattempttoavertany embarrassmentonhis behalf.
Thismorningtheman oppositemeonthebustook hisrightlegoutofhis trousersanddrew2lines aroundhiskneewithared felttippen.Then,he appliedsomesortof embrocation.Thankfullythe penmanshipdidn’tsmearhe hadobviouslyplannedahead byusingindelibleink.
Theentireprocedurewas quitefast,onlyaminute andahalf.
Ididn’ttimehim.Ihad leftmywatchonthe kitchentablebesidethe marmalade,soI’monly guessing.
Ayounggirlpassedbythe windowearlierthismorning. Shewasskipping,smiling andwavingtoallaround.
Thepublicreactiontoher displayofjoywassopositive Ithoughttotryitmyself onthewaybackfromthe shopfromwhereIboughta pintofmilk.andasmall telescopicumbrellafromthe bargainbin.
Theresponsetomy attemptsatfrivolitywas notwhatIhopedfor. Mostlylaughterhiddenbehind handsorstrategiccravats. Ifeltquitedeflated.
WhenI’moutnextIshall walkinamoreguardedand consideredmannerbutthat won’tbeforawhile.
Thewomanwith extraordinarilybigshoes trampedpastmywindowthis morning.Ipresumeherfeet areequallyaslarge.
Ofcourse,Ididn’tshout, bangthewindow,wavemy armsaboutorotherwisetry toattractherattention. Iwasfearfulofcausing somesortofpodiatry confusion.
Iwatchedoutforher passingagaininthe afternoon,shemayhave hadareturnjourneyto makebutIdidn’tseeher.
Ihadboughtsomenice
hamfromthebutcherand havebeenplanningthe constructionofasandwich, soImayhavebeeninthe kitchen.