Ambush Magazine Volume 43 Issue 04 by Ambush Publishing

A BIMONTHLY PUBLICATION CELEBRATING LGBTQ+ CULTURE SINCE 1982

VOLUME 43 ISSUE 4 August 4, 2025

Southern Decadence Issue

AMBUSH is published six times a year and has a print circulation footprint across the Gulf Coast. For ad rates and other information, email frankearlperez@gmail.com or camzimmerman504@gmail.com

T.J. Acosta

EDITOR IN CHIEF

Frank Perez AD SALES

Frank Perez, Cam Zimmerman

CONTRIBUTORS

Brian Sands, Tony Leggio, Jim Meadows, Felicia Phillips, Charles Pizzo, Rev. Bill Terry, Kelly Schexnaildre, Cas O’Brien

Jeffrey Palmquist, Ryne Stoned, Chris Trentacoste, Dwain Hertz

PHOTOGRAPHERS

Tony Leggio, Dwain Hertz

COVER DESIGN

Ryan Leitner

AMBUSH Magazine is published bimonthly. The publisher assumes no responsibility for the claims of advertisers and has the right to reject any advertising. The inclusion of an individual’s name or photograph in this publication implies nothing about that individual’s sexual orientation. Letters, stories, etc. appearing herein are not necessarily the opinion of the publisher.

The Official Dish TJ Acosta

Dear AMBUSH Nation,

This issue marks one year since AMBUSH has been back in print. I want to send a heartfelt thank you to our advertisers who have made this endeavor possible and to Frank Perez who coordinates getting each issue to print. And of course, I want to thank you, our loyal readers. We do this for you!

Congratulations to our Southern Decadence Grand Marshals ChiChi Rodriquez, Willie Mackie, Monique Michaels-Alexander and DJ Dolla Bill. You all have represented our community well and we at AMBUSH hope you have a successful Decadence weekend culminating with the Southern Decadence Parade. On behalf of our community, thank you all for your efforts in making Southern Decadence weekend a success!

Save the date! The 35th Annual Gay Appreciation Awards will be held on Saturday, August 16th at the Marigny Opera House from 6 to 9 pm. This is an opportunity to thank those in the LGBT+ community who are often not recognized for the outstanding services and efforts they perform. We hope to see you there! Tickets can be purchased on Eventbrite.

NOTE ON THE COVER: The cover image is the official poster of Southern Decadence. Photography by Craig Fremin. Poster design by ChiChi Rodriguez. Learn more about this year’s Grand Marshals on page 9.

From the Editor’s Desk Frank Perez

This issue of AMBUSH marks the one year anniversary of the magazine’s return to print. AMBUSH was founded in 1982 by Rip and Marsha Naquin-Delaine and remained in print until March 2020. At that time, when the city shut down because of the COVID-19 pandemic, business and tourism came to a grinding halt. AMBUSH maintained a digital presence during the pandemic and decided to return to print last year. The public response has been incredibly positive. For that, we at the magazine are pleased and grateful, and we look forward to continuing to meet the public’s desire for a hardcopy edition they can touch and feel and hold in their hands.

In the last year, we have expanded our circulation footprint from New Orleans to include Baton Rouge, Gulfport, Biloxi, and Mobile. In addition to featuring eight regular columns, we have also added a cover design artist (Ryan Leitner) and a sales representative (Cam Zimmerman). Of course, none of this would be possible without our advertisers. To them we offer a huge THANK YOU and ask you, our readers, to patronize them. If you are interested in advertising in AMBUSH, please reach out to me (frankearlperez@gmail.com) or Cam Zimmerman at camzimmerman504@gmail.com.

Southern Decadence Feature: David Rhodes Unleashes DADDY ISSUES at the AllWays Lounge and Cabaret

This Southern Decadence weekend, following sold-out engagements in New York and Provincetown, international cabaret star and New York City’s Top Daddy, David Rhodes, takes center stage at The AllWays Lounge and Cabaret with his provocative, unfiltered cabaret / burlesque hybrid DADDY ISSUES one night only, Saturday August 30th at 10 p.m.

Equal parts confession and striptease, DADDY ISSUES is a fearless fusion of story, song, and burlesque, diving deep into queer identity, emotional chaos, and the complicated joys of being (and loving) a Daddy. With biting wit and powerhouse vocals, Rhodes crafts an intimate, electrifying evening that’s as heartfelt as it is thirsty.

New York swag meets Southern Decadence in this powerhouse tour-de-force. Combining Daddy eye candy with songs, dance and candid storytelling, Rhodes spills the T on life, love, and coming of age in the era of the Daddy. You’ll be edging in your seats with no holding back and no pulling out!

Directed and choreographed by Broadway’s Anthony Murphy (The Wiz, Aladdin, Diana), with musical direction and orchestrations by Michael Ferrara, this one night only Southern Decadence event promises bold theatrics, unfiltered storytelling, and edge-of-your-seat entertainment.

Whether you’re celebrating Southern Decadence with glitter or grief, laughter or lust, DADDY ISSUES is your invitation to feel it all and let it all hang out.

TICKETS:

$20 – Available at https://www.redeyetickets.com/daddy-issues/

SOCIALS:

@therealdavidrhodes | @allway_cabaret_club | #DaddyIssuesCabaretDavid Rhodes

Meet Your 2025 Southern Decadence Grand Marshals

The annual Southern Decadence parade will take place in New Orleans on Sunday, August 31. This year’s parade is being produced and led by Grand Marshals Bill Hinks, Monique Michaels-Alexander, Willie Mackie, and ChiChi Rodriguez. The Grand Marshals were named by their predecessors on May 10 at an announcement party at Oz. The Grand Marshals announced this year’s theme (“Etched in Stone, Timeless and Decadent”) and revealed the official poster (see cover image) at a Press Party on June 21 at the Bourbon Pub & Parade. Dozens of fundraisers are planned throughout the summer. Proceeds left over after paying for the parade will benefit three local charities: Women With A Vision, NOAGE, and the LGBT+ Archives Project of Louisiana. Southern Decadence began in 1972 when a group of friends threw a house party on the Sunday before Labor Day. They repeated the party the following year, but added a parade. The first Grand Marshal, Frederick Wright, was named in 1974.

Bill Hinks Monique Michaels-Alexander

Willie Mackie

ChiChi Rodriguez

Weekly Events Tony Leggio

Monday

·NOAGE New Orleans Walking Group; Audubon Park; 6500 Magazine St, New Orleans, LA; 4 p.m. NOAGE’s weekly walking group meets on Mondays at 4:00 PM at the Magazine Street entrance to Audubon Zoo. They start walking promptly at 4:00, so be sure to arrive a few minutes early. Please consult with your primary care physician before beginning any new fitness regimen, especially if you are not

used to regular exercise. PLEASE NOTE: The walking group will be AUTOMATICALLY CANCELED in the event of inclement weather.

·Cooking with Monica: The Golden Lantern; 1239 Royal St., New Orleans, LA; 5 p.m. Come enjoy delicious food cooked by Monica every Monday at 5 p.m. and stay and enjoy cocktails with her ‘till her shift ends at 2 a.m.

·Monday Night Madness Pool Tournament: SIPPS Gulfport; 2218 25th Ave. Gulfport, MS; 9 p.m. – midnight. Come sing your heart out.

·Betsy Propane’s Smoke Show; The AllWays Lounge & Cabaret; 2240 St. Claude Ave.; 8 – 9:30 p.m. Betsy Propane & The Accessories are a Jazz Trio fronted by a female lead singer, who dabbles in the Ancient Art of Bump & Grind, and wants to share those powerful pipes through song & performance. Cover $20.

·Mondays at the Den: The Four Seasons Den & Patio Bar; 1229 N. Causeway Blvd., Metairie, LA; 8 p.m. Come check out the hot men dancing every Monday night.

·LAZY SUSAN KARAOKE: Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St.; 9 p.m. – 1 a.m. Mondays are, once again, a DRAG! See your favorite Queens! Sing your favorite songs! GET WEIRD! With a rotating cast of drag hosts.

Tuesday

·Sing-A-Long Karaoke with DJ Slay: Flip Side Bar and Patio; 213 Conti St., Mobile, AL.; 7 – 11 p.m.

·Trivia Night: Crossing NOLA; 439 Dauphine St.; 7:30 p.m. 5

Rounds of Ten Questions Plus a Bonus Round; Prizes for 1st, 2 nd & Last Place; $3 Wells & Domestics ‘til 8PM; Kitchen Open ‘til 10PM. Call the Bar at (504) 523-4517 to reserve a table.

·George’s Tuesday Night Trivia; George’s Place; 860 St. Louis St., Baton Rouge; 7 – 9 p.m. Come play trivia every Tuesday with a different theme each week.

·Big Easy Stompers Line Dancing: Mags 940; 940 Elysian Fields Ave., New Orleans, LA.; 8 – 11 p.m. The Big Easy Stompers have free dance classes every Tuesday. They have been giving dance classes to the LGBTQ+ community and general public. Classes are free and start at 8:00 p.m. with open dancing at 9:00 p.m. All are welcome and beginners are welcome.

·No Judgment Karaoke at Good Friend’s: Good Friend’s Bar; 740 Dauphine St.; 8 p.m. – midnight. Come enjoy karaoke with fabulous hosts and a chance to win great prizes

·Weekly Pool Tournament; Phoenix Bar; 941 Elysian Fields Ave., New Orleans, LA; 8 – 10 p.m. The Phoenix Pool Tournament is every Tuesday night! $5 buy in, winner takes all. Drink specials begin at 7 p.m.

·Trivia Tuesdays; SIPPS Gulfport; 2218 25th Ave. Gulfport, MS; 8 – 10 p.m. Come out and enjoy Big Gay Trivia with Tara Shay Montgomery.

·B-Bob’s Gay Bar Bingo: B-Bob’s; 213 Conti St., Mobile AL; 8:30 & 10 p.m. Hosted by Champagne Munroe, come out for fun and great prizes.

·Open Talent Night: Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA; 9 p.m. – 1 a.m. Hosted by Debbie with a D.

Wednesday

·Showtunes Sing-A-Long; Bourbon Pub & Parade; 801 Bourbon St.; 8 – midnight. With VJ Brendan Thompson. Grab a Cocktail and Sing – A – Long to some of your all-time favorites.

·No Judgment Karaoke; Cafe Lafitte in Exile; 901 Bourbon St.; 8 p.m. – midnight. Come sing you heart out at the oldest Gay Bar in New Orleans. (Cont’d on pg. 12)

AMBUSH is published six times a year in February, April, June, August, October, and December. Contact Frank Perez at frankearlperez@gmail or Cam Zimmerman at camzimmerman504@gmail.com for advertising rates.

Weekly Events Cont’

·Men At The Den: The Four Seasons Den & Patio Bar; 1229 N. Causeway Blvd., Metairie, LA; 8 p.m. Join the Four for an evening of go-go dancing!

·Wednesday Night Variety Show: The Page; 542 N. Rampart St., New Orleans, LA.; 9:15 p.m. Hosted by Simone Rishard. $5 entry fee and drinks specials all night.

·The Ladies of Oz Show Night; Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St.; 9:30-11:30 p.m. Featuring the Ladies of Oz and DJ Tim Pflueger.

·Queen’s Karaoke: George’s Place; 860 St. Louis St., Baton Rouge; 10 p.m. – midnight. Hosted every Wednesday by Alvin McGee starting at 10 p.m.

Thursday

·Karaoke at Pub: Bourbon Pub & Parade; 801 Bourbon St.; 7 p.m. – midnight. Sing your heart out every Thursday upstairs at the Parade. There will be a different special host each week. Choose from over 30,000 songs.

·The Van Ella Bordella: A Storyville Burlesque; The AllWays Lounge & Cabaret; 2240 St. Claude Ave.; 8 – 9:30 p.m. The Van Ella Bordella, New Orleans’ Storyville spectacle, is back with an all-new show, original music, and courtesans. Limited seating. Join Madam Lola Van Ella and her courtesans for an evening of debauchery, scandal, decadent delights and Victorian era brothel history. For tickets, go to www.eventbrite.com

·QUEERS OF COMEDY New Orleans: Oz; 800 Bourbon St.; 8 p.m. A group of queer comedians performing comedy together.

·Oz Strip Off: Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA; 10 p.m. – midnight. Come enjoy the Oz Strip Off contest sponsored by Swiss Navy. Contestants in this male

go-go competition can win $300 in cash and prizes for 1st Place.

·Karaoke Night; George’s Place; 860 St. Louis St., Baton Rouge; 10 p.m. – midnight. Hosted every Thursday by Cassini starting at 10 p.m.

·So You Think You Can Drag: B-Bob’s; 213 Conti St., Mobile AL; 11 p.m. Winner chosen by audience applause.

Friday

·Cardio with NOAGE: Treme Recreation Community Center; 900 N. Villere St.; 6 p.m. Dance Cardio is a low impact dance cardio workout for active adults aging actively, set to high energy hiphop, rock, R& B, blues and funk.

·Trixie Minx’s Burlesque Ballroom at The Jazz Playhouse: Royal Sonesta; 300 Bourbon St.; 7 and 9 p.m. shows. Come join us for a modern spin on a classic 1960’s Bourbon Street Burlesque Show with a rotating cast of soloists all performing classic strip tease to live music, bringing quality Jazz & Burlesque back to its original home on Bourbon Street. Get tickets at www.eventbrite.com

·Whiskey & Rhinestones: The Original Nite Cap: 1300 St. Bernard Ave., New Orleans, LA; 8 p.m. Whiskey & Rhinestones returns in its new forever home - The Original Nite Cap! Nestled upstairs in the historic 7th Ward of New Orleans overlooking St. Bernard Ave burlesque dancers invoke the spirit of history and celebration of the city while you enjoy incredible cocktails and a smattering of delicious food options to enjoy during the show. The Original Nite Cap operates under the direction of local burlesque legend, Bella Blue, and strives to create a guest experience that is unparalleled in both hospitality and quality entertainment. Please do not hesitate to let us know if you are celebrating a special event. 7pm doors. 8pm showtime. $20 cover. Featuring a rotating cast of local and traveling burlesque entertainers! Tickets are at Eventbrite.com and at the door. We open to the public at 9pm! You're welcome to stay after the show and continue to hang with us! (Cont’d. on pg. 14)

Trans Matters Cas O’Brien

Delisa Newton: An Original New Orleans Trans Icon

In 1963 Delisa Newton became the first African American transgender woman to medically transition in America on record. While battling for her right to exist and receive gender-affirming care, Delisa did something few dared she publicly shared her story just a year after completing her transition. Because of that vulnerability, most of what we know about Delisa Newton comes from her 1966 SEPIA magazine series, “From Man to Woman.”

Born in 1934 in New Orleans, she moved with her family to Houma, Louisiana, at age four. Her Haitian mother raised her after her parents separated when she was three. Delisa grew up in a large family but never felt fully at home. She avoided rough-housing with her brothers, yet her sisters excluded her from their games. When she was twelve, a school note demanded her “too long” hair be cut to look more like a boy’s. “I thought it was pretty,” Delisa wrote. “I didn’t understand why I had to cut it.” As the barber shaved around her ears, she sobbed. When her mother told her boys couldn’t have long hair, Delisa screamed, “Then I want to be a girl.” This moment awakened her awareness of gender.

At fourteen, Delisa lied about her age and joined the Army, seeking escape and purpose. But military life brought its own isolation. “I would lie in my cot at night wanting to die,” she wrote. Eventually, she formed a secret relationship with an older white officer, her first experience of love. When their relationship ended after her discharge, she was heartbroken. “I started dreaming about the shattering bolt of lightning that would change my body into a proper house for my mind and spirit.”

Delisa’s first surgery in 1963 she described as excruciating but life-affirming. Though her surgeon had never performed the operation before, he worked closely with expert doctors from Denmark. Complications during follow-up procedures left her hospitalized for months, but the support of nurses and a psychologist helped her recover. Two years later, after her final operation, she could finally “take up her new life as a 100 percent American Negro woman.”

Delisa gave herself the life she always wanted and deserved after her transition she bought a new car, dated freely, and left nursing to pursue her dream of becoming a jazz singer. Though we can speculate the many reasons Delisa could have had to share her story, it is certain she gave trans and gender questioning people in the mid twentieth century some kind of hope and guidance. Telling her story may have been the closure she needed, as Delisa said, “It seemed a perfect time to make a completely new start. And now, to light up the last bit of dark on stage, I’ve told my story in Sepia Magazine. Everyone will read about me, think about me for a while, and eventually forget that I wasn’t born a woman.”

After the Army, Delisa used her GI Bill to become a nurse and eventually moved to San Francisco. In a new city, she began living off and on openly as a woman. During an abusive relationship where Delisa needed to seek medical attention, she met a doctor who performed partial facial feminization surgery on her and helped her get started on hormone therapy. Bringing her a step closer to getting gender reassignment surgery.

As a Black trans woman in the 1960s, Delisa faced both racism and transphobia. She encountered many dismissive and racist doctors, remembering one who told her when referring to surgery, “You people are too emotional for such an ordeal.” But Delisa did not let anyone get in her way. She worked as a farm hand by day, nurse by night, and nightclub singer on

If you want more than this short glimpse of Delisa Newton’s life you can find her autobiography essay in SEPIA Magazine and other articles on digitaltransgenderarchive.net

Delisa Newton

Weekly Events Cont’d.

·Freaky Fridays: Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA; 8 p.m. Oz New Orleans is the place to be this Friday and all Fridays as Ivy Dripp and JoJo host “FREAKY FRIDAYS,” featuring performances that are sure to amaze and delight! A show that celebrates glam and horror! Join us for this one of a kind variety show spectacular!

·Raw Dog Comedy: Ugly Dog Saloon; 401 Andrew Higgins Blvd.; 8 – 11 p.m. Raw Dog Comedy is a FREE weekly comedy show in the Warehouse District. The open-mic list often features the city’s best comedians, visiting comics, national touring acts & first timers. It’s FREE to attend, but tipping is highly encouraged (comics gotta eat, too).

·Friday Show Night: Splash Nightclub; 2183 Highland Road, Baton Rouge, LA; 9 p.m. Splash’s Show Night is BACK, and it's about to be EPIC! Join us every Friday for the hottest drag show in the capital city! Get ready to be dazzled by the fabulous Bombshells of Baton Rouge, plus a surprise special guest each week! Hosted by the fabulous Miss Thing, who’s serving looks and laughs all night long! Whether you’re a drag aficionado or just looking for a fun night out, this is the place to be! Don’t miss the chance to live your best life with us!

·Bayou Blues Burlesque: The AllWays Lounge & Cabaret; 2240 St. Claude Ave.; 10:30 p.m. Tickets available at eventbrite.com and at the door. An intimate night of live blues music accompanied by burlesque and variety acts. Drink specials by your bartenders and comfy seating to enjoy the art of the strip tease. Music by The Delta Revues Burlesque by Miss Oops C. (AKA Oops the Clown)

·Karaoke Night @ Sipps: SIPPS Gulfport; 2218 25th Ave. Gulfport, MS; 9 p.m. – midnight. Come sing your heart out.

·Fab Fridays Show Night: Splash Nightclub; 2183 Highland Rd., Baton Rouge; 9 p.m. Join us every Friday for the hottest drag show in the capital city! Get ready to be dazzled by the fabulous Bombshells of Baton Rouge, plus a surprise special guest each week! Hosted by the fabulous Miss Thing, who’s serving looks and laughs all night long! Whether you’re a drag aficionado or just looking for a fun night out, this is the place to be! Don’t miss the chance to live your best life with us! $4 well drinks before 11.

·The Famous Corner Pocket New Meat Contest; The Corner Pocket; 940 St. Louis St.; 10 p.m. (Boys dancin’ from 7 p.m.). The country’s longest running all-male amateur dance contest (over three decades!) Hosted by Corner Pocket Emcee Felicia Phillips and former Southern Decadence Grand Marshal.

Bring your sexiest, skimpiest, and tightest undies (but no jock straps) for a chance at a cash prize of $100 ($200 if it’s your first time in our contest). Open to all contestants over 21. New dancers encouraged.

·Guys Night Fridays: Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA; 10 p.m. Dance the night away at New Orleans’ #1 Gay Dance Club with DJ Tim Pflueger 15 X Winner GAA “DJ of the Year” / Adam Joseph / Orlando Ricardo. THE OZ GOGOs DANCING ON THE BAR ALL WEEKEND!

·Friday Night Drag: George’s Place; 860 St. Louis St., Baton Rouge; 11 p.m. Join us Fridays Nights @georgesplacebr for the area’s best drag entertainers.

·Terrioke: Le Cabaret; 834 N. Rampart St., New Orleans, LA; 11:59 p.m. Come sing karaoke with Terri Aqui.

Saturday

·Drag Brunch @ the Country Club: Country Club; 634 Louisa St.; 10 a.m. – 3 p.m. Enjoy delightful Drag performances and a delicious brunch! Reservations can be made at opentable.com

·Free Comedy Jam for Improvisers: Big Couch; 1045 Desire Street; 1 p.m. Just because improv is unscripted, doesn’t mean you can’t practice it! We welcome improvisers of all levels to join us weekly to hone their improv skills, learn new ones, and connect with fun folks. An improv jam is an opportunity for anyone to perform and watch scenes.

·LGBTQIA+ Youth Drop Inn Nights: New Orleans Pride Center; 2762 Orleans Ave., New Orleans, LA: 3 - 5 p.m. Every Saturday from 3-5pm, LGBTQ+ youth (ages 13-24) can join us at The Pride Center for different activities including movies, arts, journaling, and more! FREE to attend!

·Kingz & Corsets: A Sexy Studded Affair: Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA; 8 p.m. Attention: Kings, Queens, and everyone in between! Oz New Orleans is thrilled to announce our newest show under the Oz Entertainment umbrella: Kingz and Corsets! “A Sexy Studded Affair” Starring: Justin Betweener and Hosted by: Paris Dee DeLorean. The show will feature weekly special guests.

·Dance Bitches Dance: Oz New Orleans; 800 Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA; 10 p.m. Dance the night away at New Orleans’ #1 Gay Dance Club with DJ Tim Pflueger. 15 X Winner GAA “DJ of the Year” followed by DJ Adam Joseph or DJ Orlando Ricardo.

·Show Night: SIPPS Gulfport; 2218 25th Ave.; Gulfport, MS.; 11:30 p.m. Come check out the fabulous Nicole DuBois and a rotating cast of drag performers each week. (Cont’d. on pg. 16)

Weekly Events Cont’

Sunday

·Drag Brunch @ the Country Club: Country Club; 634 Louisa St.; 10 a.m. – 3 p.m. Enjoy delightful Drag performances and a delicious brunch! Reservations can be made at opentable.com

·Morning Worship: Metropolitan Community Church of New Orleans; 5401 S. Claiborne Ave.; 10 – 11 a.m. Our worship services are best described as “Blended.” We recognize that many of our congregants come from different religious and spiritual backgrounds. We strive to incorporate elements from those various backgrounds so that all can feel a little more connected to our services.

·Solemn High Mass; St. Anna’s Episcopal Church; 1313 Esplanade Ave.; starts at 10:30 a.m. We are a diverse congregation and our slogan is “All are welcomed. None are shunned.” Our worship style is ornate with deep ritual, yet it remains warm and inviting. We are also kid and pet friendly. A real community church, St. Anna’s welcomes all members of the LGBTQ+ community.

·WigSnatchers Drag Brunch: Marigny Brasserie; 640 Frenchmen St., New Orleans, LA; 12 – 3 p.m. Located in the heart of historic Frenchmen St. comes the hottest Drag Show New Orleans has to offer. Hosted by Cosette LaFemme and Mistie Bonét, Drag Brunch @ Marigny Brasserie guarantees a welcoming and entertaining experience with some of Nola’s finest Drag Queens. Come enjoy performances by some of the most iconic artists of all time while you start the day with a plate of New Orleans, a drink in hand, and a safe space to have fun and express yourself. Email marigny.brasserie@kfkgroup.com to inquire about special event offers and group pricing of parties of 5 or more.

·Writing Across the Rainbow: New Orleans Pride Center; 2762 Orleans Ave., New Orleans, LA; 2 – 5 p.m. Writing Across the Rainbow is our new ongoing monthly LGBTQIA+ workshop focused on all aspects of writing, spanning how to get your first words on paper, to getting published and sharing your work with the world! Award-winning publisher, editor, and writer Sorella Smith will host this event which will also feature other writers as guest presenters. This is an ongoing workshop, so you can attend as many meetings as you want! This is a free event, but everyone should bring their own pens, notebooks, computers, and tablets. Everyone has stories to tell, fictional, factual, or otherwise. This workshop will assist you with such concepts as: world-building, plotting, character creation, continuity maintenance, editing, sharing constructive criticism of work, the journey forward, either to publish-

ing or wherever you want to take your writing. All prose types are welcome, including poetry, fiction, nonfiction, etc. We hope to see you there!

·Sing-A-Long Sundays: Bourbon Pub & Parade; 801 Bourbon St.; 4 p.m. – midnight. Join Gay Appreciation Award Winner VJ Brendan for Sing-A-Long Sundays.

·Vanessa Carr: The Golden Lantern; 1239 Royal St., New Orleans, LA; 3 – 5 p.m. Come see Vanessa Carr Kennedy sing your favorite songs.

·Trash Disco & Historic Napkin Toss; Cafe Lafitte in Exile; 901 Bourbon St.; 4 – 10 p.m. Come dance the night away at one of the best places to end your weekend of fun, Lafitte’s in Exile, home of the world-famous napkin toss that happens every Sunday between 8:30 and 10 p.m.

·The PlayGirlz Show: The Golden Lantern; 1239 Royal St.; 5 – 7 p.m. Come out and enjoy the show featuring Gia GiaVanni with Taze Ya Ballz and a special guest each week.

·Zingo!; The Corner Pocket; 940 St. Louis St.; 6 p.m. Zingo! with the boys pullin’ the balls. Can you say, O 69? Come play to win fabulous prizes and bar tabs (free to play). Corner Pocket Emcee Felicia Phillips and former Southern Decadence Grand Marshal hosts. (Cont’d. on pg. 38)

Chop Chop Charles Pizzo

Southern Decadence: French Quarter Dining Recommendations

Bayona: This multi-awarded fine dining restaurant is legend. They’re celebrating their 35th anniversary with 35¢ martinis & a three-course lunch for $35. Start with the acclaimed garlic soup, then move on to a selection of entrées. You’re unlikely to find the Smoked Duck “PB&J” anywhere else, and the New Orleans Style BBQ Shrimp with creamy grits offers local flavor. Recently, I sampled the Chilled Heirloom Tomato Bisque and Chicken Saltimbocca. Both were sophisticated and scrumptious;

the ever-changing, house-made sorbet is excellent too. Chef de cuisine Christy Engeran also offers innovative anniversary tapas (small plates); choose four for $35 at lunch (many vegan options). The roasted whole baby eggplant and roasted golden cauliflower were outstanding (golden raisins and capers in one dish? Unexpected and crazy good.). Highly recommended; reservations suggested. Great wine list. Sponsored tasting.

Killer Po’ Boys: A po’ boy is a baguette sandwich a quintessential New Orleans staple rooted in nearly a century of history. Killer does a modern interpretation featuring Vietnamese bahn mi bread and creative fillings. Seared Gulf Shrimp is a standout, and the Glazed Pork Belly or Beef Debris are quite good too. Vegan options. Two locations; one open late.

Wakin’ Bakin’: A breakfast spot serving until 2:00 p.m. daily, the menu is wide enough to satisfy any group. From traditional egg dishes to biscuits & sausage gravy, or a tofu bowl (vegan) to seafood étouffée with grits, you’re unlikely to find anyplace else with this much menu diversity. Fresh squeezed OJ! Oat or almond milk. One or two blocks from popular bars.

more known for amazing craft cocktails. Everything is rarified and elegant. The setting is rather posh (including a lovely courtyard), and the menu offers elevated British fare for sharing. You can splurge on caviar, or slum with a delicious foie gras parfait with brioche, or smoked tuna. Reservations suggested.

EmpaNOLA: Want something fast and not necessarily looking to sit down? Hand pies are the specialty here. They’re air fried in a pizza oven and grease-free. There are traditional Latin varieties, and eclectic options such as crawfish étouffée (excellent) or gumbo (in a hand pie? Yes, the filings are thickened). Spinach & artichoke is a personal fave. Inexpensive. Counter and curb seating; very close to the bars. Vegan options.

Chicken Saltimbocca, Bayona

Jewel of the South: Another award-winning option, this one

Habana Outpost: Staying in Treme, the Seventh Ward, or the Marigny? This colorful spot on the edge of the French Quarter has a cool vibe and a/c inside, or a large patio with an arcade game and fountain outside. The Cuban Sandwich features tender pork and deli ham. The menu is pan-Latin and familiar (nachos, burritos, quesadillas, bowls, etc.). I loved the eggplant al pastor taco (with pineapple!). Grilled corn & vegan options. Alcohol. Order at the counter.

(Photo by Charles Pizzo)

Tales of the Cocktail, NOAGE, and Arnaud’s

Know Your History Frank Perez

The First Southern Decadence

This year marks the 53rd anniversary of Southern Decadence. Over the last half century, Southern Decadence has evolved into the third largest event in New Orleans’ annual calendar and one of the largest LGBT+ events in the nation. Every Labor Day weekend, roughly 200,000 queer folks fill the French Quarter and Marigny, bringing with them an economic boom for hotels, restaurants, and bars. Pride flags are everywhere, and everyone is in a celebratory mood.

But what is little known is that Southern Decadence did not start out as a specifically gay event. It began with a group of friends, some of whom were gay, who had a house party. Actually, two house parties.

The year was 1972. In the Faubourg Treme, at 2110 Barracks Street, Michael Evers and his lover David Randolph lived in a run-down dilapidated house with a large backyard and a dependency. This home served as a headquarters of sorts for a close-knit group of friends who playfully dubbed themselves the “decadents.” Many of the decadents also lived on the property, thus rendering it a commune of sorts. The decadents dubbed the property “Belle Reve,” the name of the plantation Blanche Dubois loses in Tennessee Williams’ A Streetcar Named Desire.

The decadents were a diverse group. Some were black, some were white, some were gay, some were straight. The one thing they had in common was a deep camaraderie. And they loved to have fun. At the end of August, David Randolph’s stepfather died, and he had to return to Michigan to help his mother. While he was gone, the group decided to have an end of summer party. Maureen Block, sometimes referred to as the mother of Southern Decadence, once observed, “I think they started planning the party to shut me up.” Maureen and her husband Charlie had just moved to town so she could attend graduate school at Tulane University. She had become increasingly vocal about the excessive heat and her boredom and impatience as she waited for the fall semester to begin. The party, she said, “gave us something to look forward to, and nothing pleased us more than getting together with our friends.”

Robert Laurent, who had recent graduated with a degree in graphic design, designed an invitation to the party, which read, “Yall come to the dress up as your favorite Southern Decadent.” The party took place on Sunday, September 3, 1972. Less than two weeks later, Evers left to join Randolph in Michigan, which provided another excuse for a party. Laurent designed another invitation which read, “Come Back to Belle Reve!” About fifty people attended the second party, which took place on Saturday, September 16, 1972.

The following year, Laurent suggested the party start at Matassa’s and “parade” back to Belle Reve. “I thought it would be outlandish for all of us to first meet at Matassa’s in full costume and then parade back to Belle Reve for the party.” Thus began the Southern Decadence parade. In 1974, the first Grand Marshal, Frederick Wright, was named and the rest is history.

By the 1980s, the parade had outgrown the house party. Matassa’s Bar closed in 1980 and since 1981, the parade has started at The Golden Lantern. The Southern Decadence Grand Marshal’s parade is always the Sunday before Labor Day and is the heart of what has become known as Southern Decadence.

The five-day extravaganza has morphed into something the original decadents could have never imagined. While some have passed away, some are still with us. And although they do not seek recognition or the limelight, they still watch the parade in amazement at what they wrought.

The first two Southern Decadence Invitations designed by Robert Laurent. Courtesy of the LGBT+ Archives Project of Louisiana

Frederick Wright, Robert Laurent, Maureen Block, and Michael Evers.

George Roth Wins Lifetime Achievement Award

George Roth will receive the Lifetime Achievement Award at the annual Gay Appreciation Awards on August 16.

Roth has lived a legendary life, playing key roles in Gay Carnival, early bathhouse culture, the New York drag scene, Fire Island, and showbusiness.

Born in 1936 and raised in New Orleans where he attended St. Aloysius High School, Roth then attended Louisiana State University. While in college, Roth served as a cheerleader for the Tigers. After attending L.S.U., Roth moved to New York City and secured a job as a dancer at the fabled nightspot, Club 82. Roth briefly taught school in Connecticut before returning to New Orleans. Roth’s career then took him to San Francisco, where he opened two bathhouses in the 1970s Bulldog Baths and Club San Francisco. Roth also had a career in the casino industry. He handled costumes for Siegfried and Roy in Las Vegas and he later helped open the Beau Rivage on the Mississippi Gulf Coast as the head of wardrobe for Cirque du Soleil. In 2017, he joined Local 478, a motion picture and television union.

He continues to work part-time as the doorman at the Corner Pocket. He has lived in the French Quarter since 1990.

Roth’s place in gay history is remarkable not only for the scope and breadth of his long tenure, but also because he is a link to the origins of Gay Carnival, a uniquely New Orleans phenomenon. In the late 1950s, Roth was a member of the Krewe of Yuga, the first gay krewe in New Orleans. Roth’s involvement in Gay Carnival stretches from its humble beginnings to the present day. Last year, Roth was named King Queen of the Krewe of Queenateenas.

The photographs used in the documentary, The Sons of Tennessee Williams, in which Roth was featured, were Roth’s. Roth has also been featured in two other documentary films: Cherry Groves Stories (about Fire Island) and P.S. Burn This Letter Please (about the history of drag in New York City). Roth was crowned the third “Miss Fire Island” in 1969 and later Ms. Fire Island in 2000.

The 35th annual Gay Appreciation Awards will take place on August 16 at the Marigny Opera House. Tickets are available on Eventbrite.

NEWS BRIEFS

Trump’s “Big, Beautiful Bill” Passes; Adversely Affects LGBT+ People

Congress recently passed Trump’s budget bill, which cuts nearly $1 trillion from Medicaid and puts over 14 million people at risk of losing access to healthcare. The legislation also jeopardizes care for 21% of transgender individuals and 40% of people living with HIV who rely on Medicaid. There are currently 276,000 transgender adults enrolled in Medicaid. In addition, the law threatens the financial viability of LGBTQ+ health centers offering gender-affirming care, STI testing, and mental health services. Further, the new law eliminates federal funding for Planned Parenthood, one of the few providers of inclusive, affirming reproductive and primary care for LGBTQ+ people.

Sarah McBride Opposes Trump’s Purge of Trans Military Personnel

Delaware representative Sarah McBride, the first out transgender member of Congress, recently spoke out against the Trump administration’s continued purge of trans service members. On July 21, McBride gave a speech on the House floor and called the policy “immoral,” “un-American,” and a “direct blow to readiness These are Americans who have served with honor, with distinction, and with unshakable patriotism,” McBride said. Trump recently issued an executive order instructing the military to discharge thousands of transgender troops.

Louisiana Legislature Recap

The Louisiana Legislature recently concluded its regular session. Legislation was passed that: creates the crime of child grooming (SB58), requires public assistance organizations to report undocumented people to ICE (HB307), criminalizes any effort to help people avoid ICE (SB15), expands the crime of “coerced abortion” (HB425), expands possible lawsuits for abortions (HB575), allows political campaign signs in school sports facilities (SB4), makes youth criminal records more accessible (HB445). For more information on the passed legislation, visit https://www.latransadvocates.org/lege-tracker

Louisiana’s First Historical Marker Noting a Gay Person Placed in Houma

A state historical marker noting Peter Putnam was recently placed in Houma, LA, near Putnam’s former home. In 1979, Putnam commissioned and funded the Gay Liberation Monument at the historic Stonewall site in New York City. The marker is the brainchild of New Orleans attorney Jack Sullivan, who worked with the LGBT+ Archives Project of Louisiana to have the marker placed. It is the first state approved historical marker noting a gay person in Louisiana.

Curtain Up Brian Sands

One of our city’s biggest cultural events blows into town over Labor Day Weekend. The extravaganza known as Southern Decadence returns to the streets of New Orleans with as diverse a cast of characters as one could imagine.

Other, more traditional theatrical events take place indoors, both before and after SD, however, and they’re well worth checking out.

Arthur Miller’s classic drama The Crucible does not appear here too often. That will change when Fat Squirrel presents this Tony Award-winning drama at Big Couch August 4-14. Set during the Salem Witch Trials, this particular production will be presented as an examination of mental health, exploring the effect a Puritanical society has on young women, especially as seen in conversion disorder, a type of mass hysteria that results in a physical manifestation of trauma.

Among the members of Director Andrea Watson’s cast are Miles Hamauei, John Jabaley, Clint Johnson, Mary Langley, Jonathan Mares, Mary Pauley, Joe Signorelli and Joe Wright. Miller wrote The Crucible as an allegory during the 1950s’ McCarthy era; it will be interesting to see how it resonates today.

In Ms. Holmes and Ms. Watson, Apt. 2B, playwright Kate Hamill transforms Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s iconic detective duo into a pair of modern-day, female roommates navigating a post-pandemic world. Sherlock Holmes brilliant, eccentric, and emotionally aloof teams up with the pragmatic and empathetic Joan Watson. Together, they form a deeply codependent, quasi-dysfunctional “Odd Couple”, solving crimes and confronting villains who always seem one step ahead.

Crescent City Stage will give this darkly comic re-imagining its local premiere at Loyola’s Marquette Theatre. Lorene Chesley and Brittany Chandler star as Holmes and Watson, respectively, with Sarah Colbert Cutrer and Jarrod Smith playing an assortment of other roles. Elizabeth Newcomer directs. Whodunnit? Find out August 28 through September 14.

In Tennessee Williams’ Out Cry: The Two-Character Play, Felice, a playwright/actor, and his sister Clare, an actress, find themselves abandoned by their troupe while on tour. To satisfy their expected audience, the siblings prepare to perform a two-character play that Felice has written. Reality and illusion, however, quickly blur. Felice’s play apparently reflects their own possibly violent past, involving the death of their parents, but, as they rehearse, they discover that the script can be altered whenever one or both of them cannot accept its truth (or remember the words).

Kicking off their eleventh season, The Tennessee Williams

Theatre Company of New Orleans (TWTC) presents this seldom seen work at Loyola’s Lower Depths Theatre September 10 -21 in a production directed by Beau Bratcher. Tracey E. Collins and Kyle Daigrepont star in Williams’ desperate yet tender cri du cœur.

The Broadway hit Waitress comes to the Jefferson Performing Arts Center September 12-21. Inspired by the late Adrienne Shelly's charmingly bittersweet 2007 film, Waitress tells the story of Jenna, a waitress and expert pie maker, who dreams of a way out of her small town and loveless marriage. A baking contest in a nearby county (and the town's new doctor) may offer her a chance at a fresh start. But Jenna first must summon the strength and courage to confront and then rebuild her own life.

Waitress features original music and lyrics by Grammy-winner Sara Bareilles, and will be directed by Broadway veteran Leslie Castay. Yum.

Critical Mass, a dark and caustic comedy by Deb Margolin that's all about the critical impulse, from its most elegant to its most petty, is slated to receive its regional debut September 19-29 at The Marigny Opera House as part of Intramural Theater's residency there. When the play premiered offBroadway in 1997, The New York Times called it "an artful and insightful work about our compulsion to inflict opinions on one another, and beyond that, a treatise on how we smother our loneliness with words."

Tricia Anderson directs a cast that includes Pam Roberts,

Dontez Banks, Joe Signorelli, Mary Davis, Roney Jones, Josh Tierney as “The Critic” the first weekend, and yours truly as “The Critic” the second weekend. When Margolin appeared in JPA’s True West earlier this year as Lee & Austin’s mom, I wrote that she “scored a bull’s-eye.” I hope she’ll feel the same way (Cont’d. on pg. 34)

Deb Margolin

Curtains Up Cont’d. about my performance in her play.

On the Northshore, Mandeville’s 30 by Ninety Theatre presents Andrew Lloyd Webber’s buoyant musical School of Rock. Based on the movie, the tuner follows Dewey Finn, a wannabe rock star who decides to earn some extra cash by posing as a substitute teacher at a prestigious prep school. There he turns a class of straight–A pupils into a guitarshredding, bass-slapping, mind-blowing rock band. But can he get them to the Battle of the Bands without their parents and the school’s headmistress finding out? See for yourself August 9–24.

School of Rock will be followed by Tuesdays with Morrie (Sept. 12–21), the autobiographical story of Mitch Albom, an accomplished journalist driven solely by his career, and Morrie Schwartz, his former college professor. Sixteen years after graduation, Mitch happens to catch Morrie’s appearance on a television news program and learns that his old professor is battling Lou Gehrig’s Disease. Mitch is reunited with Morrie, and what starts as a simple visit turns into a weekly pilgrimage and a last class in the meaning of life.

All you friends of Dorothy out there should follow the yellow brick road to the Slidell Little Theatre for The Wizard of Oz,

Ask Felicia Felicia Phillips

a stage adaptation of L. Frank Baum’s tale, featuring the classic score from the MGM film. Originally done by the Royal Shakespeare Company (classy, eh?), this version includes the songs Over the Rainbow, Munchkinland (Ding Dong! The Witch Is Dead), If I Only Had a Brain/a Heart/the Nerve, We’re Off to See the Wizard (Follow the Yellow Brick Road), and more. Scott Sauber directs this production which runs August 22-September 7.

And Playmakers Theater of Covington kicks off its new season with Don’t Dress for Dinner. In Robin Hawdon’s adaptation of Marc Camoletti’s French farce, Bernard is planning a romantic weekend with his chic Parisian mistress in his charming French farmhouse, whilst his wife is away. He has arranged for a cordon bleu cook to prepare gourmet delights, and has invited his best friend, Robert, along to provide the alibi. It's foolproof; what could go wrong? You can see for yourself September 6-21.

There’ll be lots of things you won’t have to dress for during Decadence. Here are two that promise oodles of fun.

Get out your togas as the theme of the Radical Faeries’ PoP [Prince of Perversion] Ball XXII is “A Midsummer's Night Wet Dream ... A Bacchanalia.” It will feature entertainment by Rebecca Rae, Randy Martono-Chai, The Dapper Dandies, and more. (Cont’d. on pg. 40)

Dear Felicia: I have an issue; I think I’m in love with a stripper! Okay, maybe not love, but I really like his vibe and his whole personality. He is a dancer at The Corner Pocket, tall, thin, kind of nerdy, basically exactly what I’m looking for in a man. I don’t want to sound like a creeper, and I have engaged in nice conversation with said dancer, although I realize that is part of his job. If I were to pursue something more like a possible date or future relationship off the clock, what is the proper etiquette to use, and would I even have a chance? I figured if anyone knew it would be you! Sincerely, A hopeless romantic and occasional Zingo Player

Dear Hopeless: That’s an age-old question and usually a question asked while still young and new to the scene, as the typical patron of the ‘male arts’ is of the older set, not necessarily wiser but older, who keeps things for entertainment purposes only. I will assume you are of the first set. So, I will give you the three top things to consider:

1) Determine if he is gay, bi or just a fun kind of guy. Point him out to me and I will privately give him my tried-and-true method to find out. (only requires a few seconds and my middle finger)

2) Find out if he is single. This is good either way, because if he isn’t single, he will lie and say he is, which means he will sooner than later actually be single. (Unless he is dating another dancer)

3) Just come enter new meat night any Friday night which will make you one of his peers and if it doesn’t work out, there might be a patron that will fall for you! And remember, with who we have in the White House again, ANYTHING is possible!

‘Til next time darlins, I’m Felicia Phillips with things to say

U-Haul Diaries Kelly Schexnaildre

What Happens Ehen Belief Gets in the Way of Abundant Love?

Since 2016, the United States has been locked in an ideological chokehold, one that is not only reshaping democracy but rupturing families and communities in irreversible ways.

The rise of MAGA and Christian Nationalism has created a landscape where political identity demands allegiance to belief systems that degrade and reject the humanity of others.

The minds and hearts of millions of Americans including most of my family have been

consumed by fear and hatred. A year ago, I made the gutwrenching decision to become estranged from them after it became clear that their deep involvement in these movements had made a close relationship untenable.

For queer and trans people, this rupture is devastating but not unfamiliar. We have always lived at risk of rejection, but the last decade has brought a resurgence of homophobia as virulent as the moral panic of the AIDS crisis in the 1980s. Our families have aligned themselves with movements that define us as broken or perverted. They repeat rhetoric meant to erode our self-worth, vote for book bans, and seek to repeal protections, all while insisting they still love us. They say, “can’t we just agree to disagree?” But we cannot disagree about our humanity, our safety, and our right to exist. I will not continue to betray myself for the sake of family.

MAGA and Evangelical Christianity have transformed large swaths of the American public into cult followers who reject critical thought, deny reality, and choose loyalty over loving compassion. These systems do not invite dialogue. They demand obedience and reward allegiance. In return, they offer the false promise of a return to an imagined 1950s America, romanticized as upright and orderly but built on racism, homophobia, and patriarchal control. A world built for white heterosexual men will never be great.

In weaponizing difference through racism, homophobia, xenophobia, and classism, our society and our families have been fractured. This rejection of others is also a rejection of the most vital parts of our own humanity the parts that yearn to be wild and free, to live without borders, unbound by tradition and not stifled by conformity. What is freedom, after all, if it does not include the freedom to move through the world, to embrace one’s true self, to be everything, everywhere, all at once?

Valarie Kaur, a Sikh activist and spiritual teacher, writes about rage as a sacred force. “Oh, my pain. Oh, my shame. Oh, my rage. You are a part of me I do not yet know Can I love you like a mother would?” Rage, she teaches, is not violence. It is a form of love that protects what is sacred and insists on truth. Her deeper invitation is to see no stranger, to recognize that

Weekly Events Cont’d

·Minx Burlesque: Howlin Wolf; 907 S. Peters St., New Orleans, LA; 6 p.m. Minx Burlesque is LIVE at the Howlin’ Wolf. Featuring a rotating cast of performers for a new and exciting show each week. From classic strip tease to circus acts to comedy Queens, Minx Burlesque has something to please and tease every audience member. For tickets, go to https:// www.ticketweb.com/events/org/13741?pl=howlin

·SIPPS Drag Bingo: SIPPS Gulfport; 2218 25th Ave.; Gulfport, MS.; 7 p.m. Come play bingo for great prizes every Sunday.

·Drag Bingeaux; Oz; 800 Bourbon St.; 7 – 9 p.m. Hosted by Ivy Dripp with go-go boys. 11 games, no cover.

·The Opulence Hour: Maison; 508 Frenchmen St.; 8 – 9 p.m. The troupe that brought you “Talk Nerdy To Me: A Weekly Nerdlesque Revue” is putting on our Sunday best for this new burlesque and variety show. The Society of Sin Burlesque & Variety every Sunday at The Maison on Frenchman at 7pm. Every week there will be a different show filled with decadent costumes, extravagant aesthetics, and big moods from our rotating cast of entertainers. For tickets, go to www.eventbrite.com

·Lipstixx Ladies on Parade; Bourbon Pub & Parade; 801 Bourbon St.; 8 – 10 p.m. Hosted by Miss Aubrey Synclaire. Showtime 8pm Sharp! Reservations accepted on a “first come first serve” at 504-529-2107.

·The Ladies of Oz Show Night; Oz; 800 Bourbon St., New Orleans, LA; 9:30- 11:30 p.m. Featuring the Ladies of Oz and DJ Tim Pflueger.

separation is an illusion. When you reject me, you reject yourself. There is no you or me, only us. It’s time for the American dream to be dreamy, to embody ultimate freedom and compassionate love.

Curtain Up Cont’d.

The PoP Ball takes place on Friday, August 29, from 7:00pmmidnight, with the collaring/sashing of the new Prince at 8:00ish. The Ball will be held at 1333 Esplanade Avenue. Suggested donation is $20; no one will be turned away for lack of funds, but an additional $15 donation is required to enjoy the open bar. The festivities will take place both indoors and in the lush gardens of the faye. Costumes are encouraged.

And all you’ll need is a towel to dress for the 8th iteration of Bette Bathhouse & Beyond (Southern Decadence edition) on Sunday, August 31, beginning at 10:00pm at Café Istanbul

NYC impresario (and erstwhile part-time New Orleanian) Daniel Nardicio brings Bette Bathhouse & Beyond back to New Orleans where singer/comone of Bette Midler’s iconic shows done at NYC’s notorious gay bathhouse, the Continental Baths.

Renowned DJ Johnny Dynell will be playing “Bathhouse Disco” from the era between Amber’s sets, while Drew Brody performs as “Barry M.” on piano to accompany Amber/Bette’s three 20-minute all-Bette song sets. As an added bonus, this year there’ll be three special guest performers: JIMBO, winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars!; Ada Vox who promises to "blow your towel off!"; and, direct from London, MOUSE!

The audience will be required to wear only towels, bathrobes, or underwear (bring your own towel, or rent one from the Bette staff for $5) to recreate the raunchfest vibe of the famed bathhouse and clothing is optional, so all Bette's are off!

Community Focus Jim Meadows

Notes on Grief and Gratitude

Acquaintances when I see them: “How are you doing?”

Me (usually) prior to November 5, 2024: “Pretty good, how about you?”

That little bit of small talk is so ubiquitous that I usually don’t give it much thought. But this has been

such a terrible year in so many ways that when people ask me the question now, I have to take a second to think about how to answer it honestly. Other people are struggling hard enough without me adding to their burden with a depressing answer to a friendly question. But the unspoken, honest answer is often: “I’m sad, angry, and grieving because of all the terrible things that are unfolding all around us every day.” Almost every bit of news I read these days is absurdly awful. And yet, I’m seeing good things happening too, and I want to acknowledge some of them. I need to remember what writer and activist Rebecca Solnit wrote: “Remember who we are. Remember that underneath what we're furious about is what we care about, that our deepest feeling in this moment isn't necessarily anger, but protectiveness for what we love that may feel like fury. And that love is very, very powerful."

Here are a few of the things in my life for which I’ve felt gratitude lately. For the sake of brevity, I’m focusing on the New Orleans LGBTQ+ community.

People who are doing positive things for others:

in this town.

Yesterday, I found out that the New Orleans Pride Center is launching a counseling program for people who don’t have health insurance (or are under-insured). This is just the latest in a long list of amazing things that the Pride Center has accomplished for our community in a relatively short time (their grand opening was in April of last year). They’ve been hosting events for NOAGE (an organization I work for that focuses on LGBTQ+ older adults) like our book club and a monthly intergenerational game night. Other events and services they’ve been hosting include a writers’ group, community meet ups and dinners, youth support services, educational presentations, singles mixers, an LGBTQ+ public health organizing group, a teacher support circle, Q&A sessions with experts, advocates, and activists about ongoing anti-LGBTQ+ legislation, and so much more. The Pride Center is an all-volunteer organization. When you think about how many people are volunteering their time to do so much good for their community, you realize that there really are a lot of incredible people

Last week at NOAGE’s monthly potluck at St. Anna’s Episcopal Church, my friend Cotter told everyone about a project she’s been working on at St. Anna’s: creating plarn mats out of plastic grocery bags for unhoused people. This isn’t something they’re just throwing together quickly; the bags are woven together, and it takes a group of people working for a long time to make them. They’re very weather-resistant, give an extra layer of protection against the cold, and provide cushion for people sleeping on hard surfaces. (People who regularly have to sleep on hard surfaces are at risk of developing pressure sores.) I’m so proud of Cotter and everyone working with her on that project. And I’m proud to know that she connected with St. Anna’s because of her interest in NOAGE, where she has been such a beautiful presence. And speaking of St. Anna’s - I haven’t been a person of faith in many years now, but I have nothing but appreciation and admiration for everything that church does for this community: free programs for underprivileged children, a food pantry for the hungry, support groups, hosting various groups’ and organizations’ events, and so much more.

The people who are preserving our history:

I’ve been involved with the LGBT+ Archives Project for many years now. In that time, I’ve seen the leadership of this organization preserve many collections of historic materials that might have otherwise been lost to memory. We’ve recorded the oral histories of our elders. We’ve hosted a great many community events focused on queer history, and several very well-received conferences. I’ve gotten to know and love the people who write the books that get our history out of the closet. I’ve met a host of people who have given their time and care to help make that happen in all kinds of ways, and I’m grateful to all of them. I’ve had the privilege of spending time at the Faerie Playhouse, the site where so many people helped make queer history here in New Orleans. And I’ve been able to meet countless people from across the country who are doing related work. (Cont’d. on pg. 42)

Community Focus Cont’d.

The people who celebrate:

At a time when so many gay bars have been closing across the country, we’re fortunate that we have so many still operating in New Orleans. Not because of the alcohol - you can get that anywhere here - but because of the people and the way they support the community. They provide a safe space for conversations, connection, and fun. Many of them host fundraisers for various causes.

We’re also lucky for queer celebrations in New Orleans like the Gay Easter Parade, PrideFest, Black Pride, Southern Decadence, and others. Some of the hardest-working people I’ve met in this town are the grand marshals of the Southern Decadence Parade. Some people don’t realize that they volunteer for countless hours hosting fundraisers, not just to pay for the parade, but to support local nonprofit organizations. I appreciate them.

And I appreciate that we know how to have a good time here. We can celebrate together, laugh together, dance together. Dan Savage said: “During the darkest days of the AIDS crisis, we buried our friends in the morning, protested in the afternoon, and danced all night. The dance kept us in the fight because it was the dance we were fighting for.”

When I started writing this, I didn’t think I’d be able to come up with so many examples of gratitude, but now I think that I could write many more pages worth. I’ll save those thoughts

for another time. But you know something? I think I’ve cheered myself up a bit. I hope I’ll remember that next time you ask me how I’m doing.