SPIRIT PICKING UP THE PIECES

At one time or another, every individual experiences grief. Death, broken or strained relationships, and pain obviously cause grief. Grieving is very important and it should not be rushed; however, if it becomes overwhelming it can affect all areas of life, ultimately leading to even greater suffering and distress. Finding the best technique for handling your personal grief can be a great help.

• Share your feelings with a friend or mentor. Talking about your grief can help you recognize your own emotions and accept them, while you are simultaneously receiving consolation and understanding from a confidant.

• Listen to soothing music. Turn on classical music, or any form of music that is peaceful, gentle, and harmonious. If you have thousands of thoughts and feelings rushing through your head, soothing music can help restore order in your mind, which can help you think things through more clearly.

• Turn to faith. If you believe in God, pray. Ask God to strengthen and console you. Draw peace, courage, and fortitude from your confidence in God’s presence in your life.

• Allow yourself to cry. Tears are a natural relief mechanism. Let them flow. Sometimes crying effectively releases different emotions and makes you feel more at peace with yourself and the situation. Unfortunately, society often portrays tears as a sign of weakness. However, tears portray universal human feelings and are one way of regaining strength.

• Talk with someone who has been through something similar. Sometimes it seems impossible to believe that anyone can understand the pain and suffering you are going through. While no one else can know exactly how you are feeling, someone who has been through a similar tragedy or loss can relate to you. Hearing about their experience can help you feel understood and might even give you new techniques for handling your grief.

• Write about your experience. If you want to write as a personal release but keep your experience private, start a diary or journal. If you want support from a virtual community or want to help others by sharing your experience, consider a public forum like a blog.

• Enjoy nature. Go for a hike, or just go out in your backyard to enjoy the view. Relaxing and breathing in the fresh air can help relieve some of the stress and tension associated with grief.

• Exercise. Walk, jog, stretch, or find some other form of exercise you enjoy. In addition to helping you release physical tension, exercise will help you maintain a healthy, balanced lifestyle while overcoming your grief.

• Make time for hobbies. Find time to do what you enjoy, even if it means working a little less. Focusing on your grief all the time can be debilitating. Prioritizing a hobby gives you a set time and focus that can distract you from the cause of your suffering and help you start building new experiences.

Try to discover which of these techniques, or combination thereof, helps you the most. Your goal should not be to forget the cause of your grief but to better understand your experience so you can accept what has occurred and continue living a healthy life. Don’t expect instant results; overcoming grief takes time and patience. If you don’t find yourself coming to terms with your grief and suffering after a period of time, or if you find that your grief is threatening your own health or safety in some way, seek professional assistance.

Men suffer at least as much from bereavement as women. Contrary to the popular stereotype of women as more dependent and emotio

SOURCE: www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hot-thought/201109/facts-about-grief nal, widowers often suffer more grief than widows do.