FREE
The LOCAL Go To Guide for Busy Families • September 2012
Buying
Organic pg. 22
When Twins Start School: Separate or Together pg. 10
Learn
Something
NEW pg. 42
Drive Thru Coffee House pg. 13 Fenced and Gated Parks pg. 40
Diagnostic Evaluation and Drug-Free Solutions for ADD/ADHD,
Aspergers, Autism, Auditory Processing and Learning Disorders Fortunately, not every child that has problems focusing has ADD. There are many causes for a child’s inability to pay attention. Examples of problem areas are the poor ability to decipher the teachers instructions in a noisy class room environment, poor working memory to keep track of where you are in a sequence of tasks, slow processing speed which can cause even the best of memories to fail, or taking so long that even a normal attention begins to drift. More troubling is the cure that is all too often prescribed after a cursory rating form and a short office visit, which can be contra indicated in about 23% of the clients who are experiencing abnormal or spike laced brain activity. But there are accurate, reliable tests to measure attention, learning, auditory processing and processing speed. And the good news is these issues can be resolved through exercises and training – which no pill can claim. The Attention & Achievement Center has years of experience and a qualified staff of psychologists and neurologists who can help identify the root causes of your child’s difficulties, and help retrain your child’s brain so it is able to focus and learn. Once the root causes have been clearly identified, we can offer non-medication based solutions for symptoms most often associated or mistaken for ADD/ADHD, Auditory processing, Sensory processing, Dyslexia (reading disorder), Learning Disorders,
Aspergers and autism. Our techniques – developed at NASA, UCLA, UCSF, among other prestigious institutions – are safe, noninvasive, fun and drugfree, with sustained, long-term results and without negative side effects. You will see measurable results – guaranteed!
We offer the following services: • Comprehensive Neuropsychological Assessments • QEEG Brain mapping • Psychotherapy • Neurotherapy • Sound Therapy • Sensory Integration Training • Coaching • School Representation (504 and IEP) • Toxicity and Nutritional Analysis • Parenting Skills • Medication Management • Neurocognitive Training • IQ (intelligence) Testing
Call for a consultation appointment today:
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www.drugfreeadd.com – Sliding scale fee for low income/financial hardships cases – Attention & Achievement Center Locations: Pleasanton, Walnut Creek, San Francisco, San Mateo and Campbell
Ali Hashemian Director
Greg Alter Ph.D., ABPP, BCIA
Anne Jackson Ph.D.
Francine Grevin Ph.D.
Meyer Proler M.D.
Carl Hirsch O.D., FCOVD
Michael Bass M.D.
Jay Gunkelman QEEG Diplomate
We offer alternative and complementary services – not medication. The State of California does not regulate alternative and complementary services or their providers.
September 2012
ACTIVE KIDS 3
The LOCAL Go To Guide for Busy Families Fall! Back to school, changing leaves, shorter days, cooling weather and schedules finally settling into place! We hope that the first few weeks of school were a huge success and not too stressful! In this issue our focus is to provide information that will help throughout the school year such as ‘How to get your Preschooler to Talk’ and ‘The Perils of Replacing Play with Homework’. While the pressures and demand of school work require your child’s attention, we want to remind parents not to forget the aspect of play and family time. Our ‘Buying Organic’ and ‘Going Gluten Free’ articles offer simple instructions on how to make the transition to a healthier lifestyle easier. As always, we would love to hear from our readers and know what you would like to see included in Active Kids each month. Thank you for reading!
Publisher | Editor Tracie Vollgraf
Marketing Manager Emily Stockman
Advertising Sales Manager Karen Ruskowski kruskowski@activekidsbayarea.com Denise Coane Dcoane@activekidsbayarea.com
Graphic Designer Teresa Craft
Marketing Interns Felicia Stiles Crystal Wigton
On the cover:
Contributing Authors
FREE
The LOCAL Go To Guide for Busy Families • September 2012
Buying
Organic pg. 22
When Twins Start School: Separate or Together pg. 10
Learn Something NEW pg. 42
Drive Thru Coffee House pg. 13 Fenced and Gated Parks pg. 40
Maddie, age 7
Photo by Mandy Irwin, Bliss Photography, www. blissphotographydesign.com
Don’t forget to check out our amazing website for updated, resourceful information that makes any parent’s life easier! www.activekidsbayarea.com
FIND US ON
Bonnie Harris Christine Carter Danielle Fredrico Julie King Kim Rice Mariaemma Willis & Victoria Kindle Hodson Michelle Long Patricia Smith Robin O’Bryant Sarah Tolson Tracie Vollgraf Tom Limbert
September
p. 6 Trusts can be a key element in financial planning for today and tomorrow p. 10 When Twins Start School: Separate of Together p. 14 How to get our
preschooler to talk about their day
p. 16 p. 18 p. 20 p. 22 p. 28 p. 30
Stop and Smell the Roses Celebrate Your Child Squaw Getaway Buying Organic Going Gluten Free
The Perils of Replacing Play with Homework
p. 34 “No You Can’t Make Me”
p. 38 Sleep for Sale p. 42 Learn Something New
p. 24 Calendar
of Events
p. 46 Kids Meal Deals
Trusts can be a key element in financial planning for today and tomorrow by Sarah Tolson
What is the sign of a good decision?®
It’s being confident in your current and future financial plans and knowing if a trust is right for you.
What is a trust?
A Trust is created by a legal document (Trust Agreement) that enables the Trust to own property for the benefit of a third party. A Trust is a versatile instrument. You create it during your lifetime to hold property and assets. After your death, the Trust can distribute the assets to beneficiaries, or hold and invest the assets for a set number of years or lifetime(s). It can distribute income generated by the investments to your beneficiaries, as dictated by the Trust.
How does a trust differ from a Will?
Unlike a Will, a trust does not have to go through probate, often a timeconsuming legal process, which may have tax implications and is part of public record. When you have a trust, your assets go to your designated beneficiaries in a tax-advantaged and confidential manner. Furthermore, with a trust, you can choose to have your assets distributed to your beneficiaries over time. However, with a Will, assets are usually disbursed as a one-time event. A trust can also provide asset management, estate planning consultation and tax services, such as investment oversight, financial reporting, asset disbursements and bill payment, which can provide great peace of mind to families as the trust Grantor, or person establishing the trust ages.
What kinds of trusts are there?
There are different types of trusts to meet a variety of objectives. Trusts are very flexible, and designed to address the Grantor’s personal wishes. The Grantor can use trusts as a key element in a comprehensive estate and wealth transfer plan, or direct how their legacy will be managed and distributed after death.
Let’s talk about trusts
Trusts can be created to accomplish specific goals. For example, if you have a child or grandchild with special needs, you can set up a Special Needs Trust to ensure that they’re properly cared for during their lifetime. For your philanthropic goals, you can establish a Charitable Remainder Trust and leave 6 ACTIVE KIDS
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some or part of your estate to your favorite charity or institution. Combinations of trusts can help address the needs of multiple families and generations.
How do I know if a trust is right for me?
Trusts are for people who want to maintain control over how their estate is managed, preserved and distributed, those who want access to professional investment management advice and services, or seek specific expertise. For example, anyone with a Special Needs family member who wants to provide funds for care while continuing to qualify for state and federal aid or people interested in making and administering gifts to a favorite charity or school can benefit from a trust. If you want to consolidate multiple investment accounts, a more tax-advantaged way to manage and transfer your assets, or want more control over the distribution of assets over time, establishing a trust could be a smart financial decision. A trust can offer more than tax benefits. It gives you complete control over the accumulation and distribution of your assets. If the trust owns life insurance, access to cash values can supplement retirement needs. A trust can also help you manage finances and pay bills if you travel frequently or become incapacitated. This is a much valued service and ensures that your bills are being paid on time and that your assets are organized. Establishing and funding a trust while you are living can help streamline the probate process and reduce many costs associated with your estate settlement. Ask your advisor how to use trusts to accumulate and protect assets for your financial welfare and the benefit of the people and places you value most. © 2011 Massachusetts Mutual Life Insurance Company, Springfield, MA C:201302-108
Sarah Tolson, Certified Financial Planner™ and Founder of Girls Just Gotta Have Funds, is passionate about helping women and families create customized wealth-building plans tailored to their goals and life circumstances. As a second generation financial planner, Sarah’s vision is to inspire women to make their dreams a reality! Sarah is offering the readers of Active Kids Directory a complimentary one-hour financial consultation and would like to extend an invitation to her monthly Wine, Women & Wealth workshop. Please call her at (925) 736-3024 or email her at stolson@financialguide.com for more information. © 2010 Massachusetts Mutual Life Insurance Company, Springfield, MA
September 2012
ACTIVE KIDS 7
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September 2012
ACTIVE KIDS 9
When Twins Start School:
Separate or Together? by Patricia Smith
You’ve always felt confident in your decisions concerning the health and well being of your two little peas in a pod. Until now. With the first day of kindergarten right around the corner, you’re feeling uncertain. Should you separate your twins and send them to different classrooms? Or keep them together under one roof? Take heart, you’re not alone in facing this dilemma. With good reasons on either side of the education coin, the debate is heating up. Studies show that a majority of parents lean toward keeping their kids side-by-side. According to a recent survey conducted by the National Organization of Mothers of Twins Club (NOMOTC), 43% of educators favor separation. Nancy L. Segal, Ph.D., researcher and best-selling author on twin methodology, offers what is perhaps the best suggestion, “The individual needs of each twin pair need to be considered by both educational and psychological consultants and parents in formulating placement decisions.” With that in mind, formulating the best placement decision for your twosome requires making a few phones calls and scheduling a couple of meetings. Below are some suggestions of who to approach in order to broaden your perspective, provide new data, and lighten your load. • Parents of school-aged twins. Who knows better than parents who have followed a certain course of action? Ask what worked for them and their twins, and what didn’t. • Teachers past and present. Talk with preschool, daycare, church, and playgroup teachers who have worked with your twins. Introduce yourself to the kindergarten teachers where your twins will attend and talk with them as well. Be open to their advice and insights. • Administrators and counselors at your twins’ school. Ask questions. What are their policies? What is the reasoning behind them? What do their statistics show? Do they have flexible placement? Is together in kindergarten, but separate in first grade an option? • Your twins. Ask each one how she feels about staying together or stepping out on her own. Always consider their feelings in making your final decision. As every parent knows, five-year-olds can be very wise. • Yourself. Follow your heart. All things considered, you probably know best. 10 ACTIVE KIDS
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Don’t discount your own instincts. Just combine them with the advice you hear from others before following your gut.
Education.com is the go-to destination for involved parents. From kindergarten readiness through college prep, Education.com gives millions of parents a month the information they need to help their kids reach their full potential and the ideas they want to make learning fun.”
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Drive -Thru Coffee House Antioch
Starbucks – Somersville & Delta Fair Starbucks – Lone Tree & Bluerock
(Longs parking lot)
Caffino – Monument & Erickson (Safeway parking lot) Caffino – Treat & Clayton Treats Natural & Organic Café – Treat & Clayton Caffino – Concord Ave & Meridian Park Starbucks – Concord Blvd & Landana Starbucks – Port Chicago Hwy & Olivera
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Benicia Brentwood Concord
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Fairfield Hayward Lafayette Livermore Martinez Oakley Pittsburg
Starbucks – Rose Dr & Columbus Pkwy Starbucks – Hwy 4 & Balfour
Caffino – Regional Road Dr. Bean – Amador Valley Blvd. Dr. Bean – Valley Blvd.
Starbucks – Travis Boulevard (Solano Mall) Caffino – Center & Kelly
Caffino – Mt. Diablo & First
Starbucks – airway off of 580
Caffino – Alhambra & Virginia Hills Drive (gas station)
Starbucks – Hwy 4 & Carol
Starbucks – Railroad & Leland Starbucks – Buchanan & Loveridge Starbucks – California & Loveridge
Pleasanton Caffino – Santa Rita Road exit San Leandro Starbucks – Bayfair Mall
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ACTIVE KIDS 13
How to get your preschooler to talk about their day by Tom Limbert 1. Don’t ask, “How was your day?” It’s so instinctive, I know. But your child doesn’t like it any more than Kramer on Seinfeld. For different reasons: it’s just too vague and she wouldn’t know where to begin to quantify it all. 2. Be Specific! You want to ask specific questions that spark a conversation: make sure a one-word answer would not suffice. “What was the best part of your day?”, “What did you do after lunch?”, “What book did you read?” Then, be sure to listen enthusiastically! 3. Get an Anecdote from a Teacher. Go ahead and graciously ask his teachers for an anecdote. Tell them that you want to have a meaningful conversation with your child. Your teachers will eat it up! (As a former preschool teacher, I know I don’t need to tell you to be sure to thank them.) 4. Use a Friend. What are friends for? Ask your child what Rebecca did outside. Follow-up on a previous story about a classmate’s endeavors. It will be easier for your child to relate a story about someone else. No friends yet? Every child develops at his own pace and every classroom has an interesting child to talk about. 5. Live and Learn. Ask your child what the worst part of the day was. Be careful not to give too much attention and energy to negativity, but do focus on solutions together! Ask her what she can do next time and help her articulate the lesson without judgment.
Tom Limbert is a published parenting author and Parent Coach and can be found online at www.parentcoachtom.com. He has been working with young children and their families since 1992. Tom has a Master’s degree in Education with an emphasis in early childhood development and is the co-creator of Studio Grow. Tom’s book, Dad’s Playbook: Wisdom for Fathers from the Greatest Coaches of All Time, has over one hundred inspiring quotes and includes a Foreword from Hall of Fame QB Steve Young.
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ACTIVE KIDS 15
Stop and Smell the Roses by Michelle Long, M.A. It seems as though the world around us is speeding up at an accelerated pace. We are rushing from appointment to appointment, taking our kids from one activity to the next, working multiple jobs, and trying to maintain a busy household. Our children are growing up in a fast-paced world with busy schedules and busy parents. Often times, as we are racing through our days, our children simply want to slow down. Recently I was walking with my 5-year-old son in the grocery store parking lot, hurrying him along so we could get into the store and get our shopping done. He suddenly stopped to look closely at some flowers and smell them. My initial reaction was: “Come on Buddy, let’s go. We can’t just stop here, we are on our way into the store...” And then I realized I NEED TO SLOW DOWN. Here was my child, literally stopping to smell the roses. He was living in the present moment, taking in the world around him, and I was rushing him. I began to ask myself, who am I to keep my son from being present and noticing the details of the flowers? Why am I hurrying him through his day just so we can get into the store 30 seconds sooner? My son reminded me to slow down, be present, and to not to rush past the beauty around me. When we are in the present moment, we often realize that there isn’t a need to be in a hurry. Here are a few ways that we can slow down and practice being present with our children in the midst of our busy day: 1. Take five or ten minutes each day for “special time” with your child. Put down your phone and give 100% of your attention to being present with him or her. Let your child choose how you will spend your time. You might find that without distractions, you are both drawn into the present moment. 2. Step outside with your child and look for things you have never noticed before. Maybe this is just the numbers on the curb, the shape of a nearby tree, or the view behind the buildings. Taking time to notice our surroundings helps to bring us into the present. 3. Practice conscious breathing with your child. Talk about breathing and teach your child to feel the belly rise and fall with each breath. See what happens
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when both you and your child slow your breathing down. It can have the power to calm the body and the mind. Often our children are our best teachers, and just by observing them, we can see what it means to be present and the value of slowing down.
Michelle Long is the owner and founder of Bloom: A Retreat for Mothers, A Treat for Children. She was born and raised in Walnut Creek and holds a Masters degree in Holistic Health Education. Michelle has been teaching yoga for more than ten years, is a certified coach, and a mother of two young children. Learn more at www.bloomretreat. com and Facebook: Bloom: A Retreat for Mothers. A Treat for Children. Call us at (925) 939-6262 or come by 1444 S. Main Street in Walnut Creek. Mention Active Kids and get your first half hour of childcare free!
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September 2012
ACTIVE KIDS 17
Celebrate Your Child! by Mariaemma Willis and Victoria Kindle Hodson Whether your child is in traditional school or is homeschooled, here are some tips taken from the C.A.R.E.S. and F.I.T.T. principles from our book, Discover Your Child’s Learning Style:
1. Celebrate your child!
Please, please, remember to celebrate your children for who they are, NOT for the quality or quantity of their school work. Get into the habit of pointing out what is RIGHT about your children. Encourage them to pay attention to their own positive characteristics and actions, to their interests, talents, and accomplishments. Compare these two sets of comments: When are you going to get it right?...Well, if there’s a way to mess it up you’ll find it...You’re so clumsy...I know you’ll lose it...You’ll probably forget like you always do... Wow, thanks for remembering to pick that up...I noticed you put your ring in a safe place...Thanks for helping your brother...That was tricky but you managed to get it done...I admire your willingness to do a few math problems even though you really dislike math... If children live with the first set of comments, it’s not a big surprise if they themselves say things like, I’m so clumsy...I’ll lose it for sure...I can’t do it... I never finish things, that’s just the way I am... Children who live with the second set of comments learn to be confident and to pay attention to what they do right. You are liable to hear them say things like, Well, it’s hard but I can try it...Next time I’m going to do it this way...Maybe I can make a plan so that doesn’t happen again...I know I can do it...I did it!
2. Focus on solutions
Instead of blaming and punishing, form a team with your children and work together on solutions. Here’s a typical monologue: You forgot your homework again - what is wrong with you? Do you like getting bad grades? You’ll never get to college and you’ll never get anywhere in life with that attitude...etc. 18 ACTIVE KIDS
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How about changing this to: I see you forgot your homework and you’re feeling frustrated about it. How about if we come up with a solution for remembering your homework? Then brainstorm together, draw things out, use a white board, make a chart if this is helpful, etc.
3. Take the pressure off
Sometimes it’s appropriate to back off of something that is causing great upset, sadness, fear, and/or frustration. For example, if math is literally making your child sick, it’s time to talk to the teacher and come up with an alternate plan. If you are homeschooling, you can stop math for a while. Continue to be in dialogue with your child so you can reevaluate when it’s time to bring math back and in what format. Remember, a person cannot learn when in a heightened emotional state - so if something is forced on a child when the child is upset, the brain will shut down and not much learning will take place anyway - plus the stage is set for a lifelong belief that one “can’t do” the particular skill or subject. To sum up: Remember that school is not life. In the end, in the real world, it won’t matter whether your child conquered dangling participles or still doesn’t get Algebra...what will matter is whether your child believes in himself, whether she is confident about her own abilities and what she CAN do. Be your children’s LearningSuccess™ Coach and bring out the stars that are shining inside!
Mariaemma Willis & Victoria Kindle Hodson, authors of Discover Your Child’s Learning Style and Midlife Crisis Begins in Kindergarten, and founders of LearningSuccess™ Institute, Ventura, CA., www.learningsuccessinstitute.com Copyright 2005-2012.
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ACTIVE KIDS 19
SQUAW Getaway by Tracie Vollgraf Founded in 1949 by Wayne Poulsen and Alex Cushing, Squaw Valley was the host to the 1960 Winter Olympic games, putting America’s West and Lake Tahoe on the map as the premier ski resort destination. Having only 1 chairlift and lodging for 50 at the time, Squaw has most certainly come a long way! Now over 3600 skiable acres, six peaks and 30 lifts Squaw is legendary for its terrain. An especially family-friendly vacation destination, Squaw offers something for the entire gang during the winter and summer. Whether you are a ski enthusiast, love the great outdoors, are looking for wonderful restaurants, shopping or relaxation, Squaw offers it all. The new Village at Squaw Valley was built by Intrawest in 2005. Squaw Valley acquired neighboring Alpine Meadows Ski Resort and formed Squaw Valley Ski Holdings LLC who now officially owns both resorts. Fall 2011 was year one of Squaw Valley’s Renaissance, a $50 million capital plan designed to bring dramatic improvements to the resort over the course of 5 years. This winter marks year 2 of the Renaissance – which will now total $70 million (up from $50) to include improvements at Alpine Meadows as well as at Squaw. My family headed up to Squaw this summer, and had a fabulous time! We stayed at The Village at Squaw Valley which is perfect and very convenient for families. Walk out of the condo’s lobby doors and you are smack-dab in the center of the Village. Offering spacious lodging with full kitchens, balconies overlooking the action and plenty of space to relax, it is a perfect place to set up home-base and close enough for nap time! Squaw Adventure Center, located in the heart of the Village offers a plethora of daily activities for the entire family! My kids were able to test their acrobatic skills on the Skyjump Trampoline, had a blast scaling the rock wall, and enjoyed the miniature golf course…all without leaving the Village! Check out their website for more information and be sure to include them in your trip planning! www.squawadventure.com 20 ACTIVE KIDS
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During our stay, we headed up to the mountaintop pool at High Camp via the aerial tram and made an entire day of it. There we discovered a mountain oasis amongst the most amazing alpine backdrop. With an 8200â&#x20AC;&#x2122; elevation, you truly feel like you are on top of the world. At High Camp you will find a breathtaking pool and spa, mountaintop disc golf, tennis and roller skating. Partake in the elevated dining experience with views stretching as far as the eye can see, and you literally do not want to leave! The kids were entertained each day, and each night the entire family was able to enjoy great food and beverages at the Village restaurants. Our favorite nights were spent at Rocker and Twenty-Two Bistro. We enjoyed the outdoor seating where we were able to watch the Village happenings, admire the beautiful mountain scenery and fresh air and experience Tahoe at its best! At Rocker, we were able to catch one of many seasonal Squaw events, the Bluesdays concert, right from our table. The entire group loved the music and scrumptious food, Mommy and Daddy enjoyed a glass of wine and fun was had by all. At Twenty-Two Bistro owner Alexander Cox and his staff are committed to creating a quality dining experience both inside the comfortable restaurant and out on the patio set against the stunning backdrop of KT22. Not only does 22 offer a top-notch dining experience, it is family-friendly and inviting, the wait staff is wonderfully accommodating and the ambience canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be beat! Squaw offers several events during the summer season, including art shows and food and wine festivals accompanied with plenty of live music. Beyond skiing and snowboarding, winter offers mountain adventures the whole family can enjoy including snowmobiling, snowtubing, riding in a horse-drawn sled or dog sledding. Whether you are a summer person or a winter baby, Squaw is definitely a year-round destination not to be missed. Squaw is all about offering a unique vacation destination that caters to families. Offering a pedestrian village of shops, restaurants, activities, specialty wine shops, spa treatments and more, you literally have everything at your fingertips. It makes for a very easy and enjoyable time with the kids while creating memories that you will cherish forever. Do make the trip, Squaw makes every minute worth your while!
September 2012
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Buying Organic by Danielle Fredrico We all want to reduce our exposure to cancer-causing pesticides and other chemicals, but with the expense of food it may not be realistic to go completely organic. By prioritizing which foods you buy organically you can keep your grocery bill within budget and make the biggest health impact.
Organic foods, as defined and regulated by the US Agriculture Department (USDA), are grown and produced without pesticides, synthetic or sewer fertilizer, antibiotics and are not irradiated or genetically modified. Most people think of produce when they think about buying organic, but all types of meat and dairy products contain high levels of contaminants. Organic milk is a great place to start, especially if your kids drink a lot of it. When it comes to produce, the following crops are consistently the most pesticide laden: tree fruit, berries, spinach, bell peppers, potatoes, celery and grapes. You can reduce your familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pesticide exposure by 80% by buying only these items organic! Buying organic spinach is a much wiser use of money than buying organic broccoli, orange juice or oatmeal. You can also save money by buying fresh produce when it is in season and cheaper. As you shop for organic produce in grocery stores and farmerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s markets, be aware that there will be more scarring and abnormal shapes. It is only through fertilizers, genetically modified seeds and pesticide use that produce grows with perfect skin, uniform shape and large sizes. As long as there is no bruising or punctures, enjoy oddly shaped squash; kids get a kick out of it.
Your prioritized organic grocery list milk (and other dairy) apples (apple sauce, juice) spinach (and leafy greens) potatoes (not sweet potatoes) peaches meat (buy wild fish) grapes
celery berries bell peppers nectarines pears cherries
How to get started: For families just getting started, I often recommend making one to three organic swaps at a time, to make the transition easier on your wallet. This 22 ACTIVE KIDS
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year, commit to buying only organic apples and milk. Make it a habit before you make another change. Next year make two more switches, organic spinach and potatoes. By making a few small changes at a time, you will not notice a change in your grocery bill. Taking it to the next level: After you have mastered the organic priorities list, continue adding more organic foods to your cart. I suggest foods that will improve your health and the planet’s first. Conventional farming uses huge amounts of energy and fuel for harvest and worldwide transport, causing air pollution. Animal waste and pesticide runoff pollute our groundwater and soil. Buying organic foods protects the environment and your health. Buy organic corn and corn products, soy, soy products and rice. Stop buying, or drastically reduce your consumption of meat, prawns and farmed fish as these farming practices cause tremendous amounts of water pollution and land destruction. Keep in mind that organic is not synonymous with healthy. Prepackaged, organic foods and meals can contain high amounts of salt, fat and sugar just like regular packaged foods. You will need to read labels to ensure something is healthy in addition to being organic. Organic, processed foods are the most expensive type of organic food with the smallest health benefit. Organic package foods like crackers, cookies or burritos would be the last organic switch to make. When organic foods are most important: • If you are pregnant, it is very important to eat organic foods. Pesticides and other chemicals can be passed from mother to child in the womb. Chemicals are passed through breast milk as well. Some chemicals can cause delayed effects on the nervous system, even years after the initial exposure. • If you have a baby in the house, you should only serve organic baby food packaged, stored and warmed in glass, not plastic. Babies are highly susceptible to chemical exposure and because they spend months eating a large portion of their food from a jar, their exposure is quite high. Chemical exposure at an early age can cause developmental delays, behavioral disorders, and motor dysfunction. Keep in mind: The benefits of eating produce (organic or not) far outweigh the risks of consuming pesticide residue, so I would never discourage eating non-organic produce. At the very least, you need to wash all fruit and vegetables with water to reduce the amount of chemicals and bacteria on the produce. Danielle Federico, M.P.H. is the author of “MOMMY FABULOUS: Complete Pregnancy Fitness and Nutrition Guide, Designed to Deliver a Fabulous Postpartum Figure.” (amazon.com) She holds a Masters of Public Health from UC Berkeley and is a personal trainer and nutritional counselor. Danielle’s popular blog www.dani-fabulous.com provides nutrition, health and fitness information for anyone looking to lead a healthier life.
SEPTEMBER calendar Alameda County September 1 Tea and Lemonade Tours
Dublin Heritage Park and Museums Dublin $15 per person Times Vary (925) 452-2101
September 1, 8, 15, 22, 29 Sizzling Saturdays Main St. Downtown Pleasanton 6:00 pm to 9:00 pm
September 1-2 Scottish Highland Gathering & Games
September 5 1st Wednesday Street Party! Main Street Pleasanton 6 pm- 9 pm
Inspire Music Academy Pleasanton 7 pm-8 pm $300 for 8 Workshops (925) 461-3266
September 7 Friday Night Concert Bankhead Theater Livermore 6:30 pm-8 pm www.mylpac.com
September 14-16 Harvest Festival Original Art & Craft Show
Alameda County Fairgrounds Pleasanton 10 am-6 pm Adults $9, Children $4, Parking $8 (415) 447-3205 www.harvestfestival.com
September 8-9 Family Camp Out Emerald Glen Park Dublin 3 pm – 10 am $16 per resident (925) 556-4500
September 15 Eat Healthy
Alameda County Fairgrounds Pleasanton 8 am-6 pm Adults $20, Children $12, Parking $8 (888) 769-2345 www.TheScottishGames.com
September 9 The Crooked Jades
September 2 31st Annual Harvest Wine Celebration
September 10, 17, 24 Rockin Dodgeball League
Livermore Valley Wineries Livermore 12 pm-5 pm $55-$65 per person (925) 447-9463
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Dublin Library 3:30 pm-5 pm (925) 828-1315
Pleasanton Public Library Pleasanton 2 pm (925) 931-3400, ext. 8
Rockin Jump Dublin 7 pm-9 pm www.rockinjump.com
September 13 November 1 Audition Workshops
September 15-16 Children’s Fair
Robert Livermore Community Center Livermore 10 am-4 pm (925) 373-5700
www.activekidsbayarea.com
September 22 Splatter; Food, Wine and Art Festival Emerald Glen Park Dublin 10 am-8 pm $ 25 Tasting Pasport www.ci.dublin.ca.us
September 29 Moonwalk
Pleasanton Ridge Regional Park Pleasanton 6 pm-8:30 pm (510) 544-3242
Mathnasium’s National TriMathalon Day
Dublin 9 am Free to register www.mathnasium.com/TriMathlon
Tomato Battle
Alameda County Fairgrounds Pleasanton 12 pm-6 pm Admission $50, Parking $8 (479) 685-5357 www.tomatobattle.com
September 30 Round Robin Sing-a-long Dublin Library 3 pm-4 pm (925) 828-1315
October 3 Witches Night Out and Martini Tasting Downtown Livermore 6 pm-9 pm $25 (925) 373-1795
Contra Costa County September 1 International Turkey Vulture Awareness Day Sulphur Creek Nature Center Hayward 1 pm-3 pm (510) 881-6747
Saturday Moring Live! Storytime for Preschoolers Orinda Public Library Orinda 11 am-11:30 am (925) 254-2184
September 2 Summer Concerts at the Lake On the Lawn at City Hall, 100 Gregory Lane Pleasant Hill 6:00 pm - 8:00 pm Free (925) 671-5229 www.pleasanthillconcerts.com
September 4 Toddler Lapsit
Giggle Walnut Creek 5pm $10 (925) 746-0300
September 6 Dinosaurs Rock
Moraga Library Moraga 4 pm-5 pm Registration requested (925) 376-6852
Preschool Time
Lafayette Library and Learning Center Lafayette 11:30 am (925) 385-2280
Toddler Time
Lafayette Library and Learning Center Lafayette 10:55 am (925) 385-2280
September 7 Downtown Plaza Concert
Downtown Plaza (between Sweet Tomatoes and Jack’s Restaurant) Orinda Public Library Pleasant Hill 10 am-10:25 am, 10:30 am-10:55 am 6:30 pm - 8:30 pm (925) 254-2184 Free
September 5, 12, 19, 26 Singing Play Group Giggle Walnut Creek 4:30 pm $5 (925) 746-0300
Giggle Storytime Giggle Walnut Creek 11 am (925) 746-0300
September 2012
Sing! Move! Fun!
Preschool Performance Series The Hipwaders Village Theater Danville 10 am www.villagetheatre.org
San Ramon Valley Chorus Presents:
Classic TV Show Theme Songs Front Row Theater Dougherty Station Community Center San Ramon 7 pm
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September 8 ZooMobile
September 15-16 Art and Wine Festival
Second Saturday Tours:
September 16 Danville d’Elegance
Dougherty Station Library San Ramon 1 pm-1:45 pm www.ccclib.org
Laundry Day Forest Home Farms Historic Park San Ramon
September 9 An Evening at Va de Vi Bistro & Wine Bar
Walnut Creek 5 pm For reservations: (925) 627-2950 Proceeds will help fund the rehabilitation and education programs at the Lindsay Wildlife Museum.
Monkey See Monkey Do
Family Friendly Improv Front Row Theater Dougherty Station Community Center San Ramon 2 pm (925) 973-3343
Couples Yoga & Wine Retreat
Bloom Retreat Walnut Creek 6:30 pm-8:30 pm Members $60 per family, NonMembers $65 per family www.bloomretreat.com
Family Film Night
“The Land Before Time” San Ramon Library 6 pm-7:30 pm (925) 973-2850
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Walnut Festival
Heather Farms Park Walut Creek 10 am (925) 935-6766 Free Event
Lafayette Downtown 10 am-7 pm
September 24 Campfire Sing-Along
Downtown Danville 11 am-4 pm www.danville-delegance.org
Ygnacio Valley Library Walnut Creek 6:30 pm-7:10 pm www.ccclib.org
Concord Antique Fair & Collectibles
Todos Santos Plaza Concord 9 am-4 pm Free Admission & Parking www.concordantiquefaire.com
September 19 Fall Wine Walk
Downtown Walnut Creek 6 pm- 9 pm $30 - $40 www.walnutcreekdowntown.com
September 20 Family Science: Space-Quivering with Curiosity!
Lafayette Library and Learning Center Lafayette 5:45 pm-7:30 pm $30 per person (925) 820-2415 www.spectrumofscience.com
September 22 8th Annual Community Service Day
Pleasant Hill Park Pleasant Hill 7:30 am-3 pm (925) 671-5229 www.pleasant-hill.net/CSD
Mini Monday-Life In and Around the Pond Lindsay Wildlife Museum Walnut Creek 10 am-12 pm $15 (925) 935-1978
September 25 John Muir Health: No 2 Knees are Alike
Community Hall Lafayette Library and Learning Center 6 pm-7:30 pm (925) 941-2677
Puppet Show: Tales of the Enchanted Forest Pleasant Hill Library 6:30 pm-7:30 pm (925) 927-3235
Where Have All the Dinosaurs Gone?
Lindsay Wildlife Museum Walnut Creek 3:30 pm-5 pm $15 (925) 935-1978
www.activekidsbayarea.com
September 28-30 SRCT Presents: Dracula “A Night in Transylvania”
Front Row Theater Dougherty Station Community Center San Ramon Show times vary (925) 973-3343
September 29 Creepy, Crawly Autumn Hikes on Mount Diablo Save Mount Diablo Walnut Creek 4:30 pm-7:30 pm Reservations required (925) 947-3535
September 30 Sienna Ranch Family Days Sienna Ranch
Out of Area September 2 Train Rides – Niles Canyon Railway Niles Station Fremont Times Vary $7 – Children, $12- Adults (95) 862-9063
September 3 Labor Day Fun!
Coyote Hills Regional Park Fremont 10 am-12 pm, 1:30 pm- 3:30 pm (510) 544-3220
September 4 Pop-In Playtime
Lafayette 12 pm-4 pm Family Pass $85 (925) 283-6311
Pump It Up Oakland 10 am-11:30 am $8 (510) 533-7867
October 1 Scarecrow Contest
Grandparents Storytime
Forest Home Farms Historic Park San Ramon 3 pm-5 pm (925) 973-3284
October 4 Socket
Village Theater Danville 8 pm-11 pm (925) 314-3400
October 5 Dracula “A Night in Transylvania”
Pottery Barn Kids 11 am Various Locations www.potterybarnkids.com
September 8 Garden Chores for Kids Ardenwood Historic Farm Fremont 1 pm-2 pm (510) 544-2797
September 8 Children’s Hospital Oakland
Birthday Bash Children’s Fairyland Front Row Theater Oakland Dougherty Station Community Center 10 am-5 pm San Ramon $10 Show Times Vary (925) 973-3343
September 2012
September 8-9 Tracy Dry Bean Festival Downtown Tracy 10 am-7pm. 10 am-6 pm Free (209) 835-2131
September 9 Hello Bunnies
Ardenwood Historic Farms Fremont 1:30 pm-2 pm (510) 544-2797
September 25 Free Movie Night
Ardenwood Historic Farms Fremont “The Lorax” 7 pm Free, Snacks and Drinks For Sale (510) 544-2553
Preschool Crafts Fremont Library Fremont 1:15 pm-2:15 pm (510) 745-1421
September 29 Halloween Fashion Show Pottery Barn Kids 3 pm Various Locations www.potterybarnkids.com
September 30 Farmyard Games
Ardenwood Historic Farm Fremont 2 pm-3 pm (510) 544-2797
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Going Gluten Free by Kim Rice Most everyone at this point has heard the term, “gluten-free.” Many may wonder if gluten is affecting their health and how to go about implementing a gluten-free lifestyle. Today the word, gluten, is used rather loosely in the term, gluten-free. The fact is that all grains, including corn and rice, have gluten. Gluten is the protein clusters of a grain. The specific protein molecules that bother those who are gluten intolerant are alpha gliadin (present in wheat including spelt and triticale), hordein (in barley) and secalimin (in rye). To go “gluten-free,” you would need to remove these grains from your diet including any products made from them such as flour. Besides the obvious foods such as bread, cakes, crackers, etc., gluten can also be present in soy sauce, French fries, chips, processed meats (including hot dogs, bacon, and deli meat) medications, supplements, cosmetics and other body products. Oats do not contain gluten but typically become cross contaminated during growth, processing and packaging. Gluten intolerance is associated with disruption of the digestive system, skin, nervous system, immune system, decreased energy level, joint function, and behavioral and mood regulation. To make it more confusing, the symptoms can vary among individuals and can range from mild to severe. Gluten tolerance is also associated with Celiac Disease (CD). For people genetically predisposed to CD (having one or both of the genetic markers HLA-DQ2 and HLA-DQ8), their body has a specific autoimmune response to gluten that damages the villi of the intestine (called villous atrophy) resulting in malabsorption of nutrients and other health issues. It is estimated that over three million people have CD. Stephen Wangen, M.D., author of Healthier without Wheat, states that recent studies show that non-Celiac forms of gluten intolerance are up to 30 times more common than CD and may affect up to 15% of the population. In recent years, the gluten-free food market has grown and evolved dramatically. Packaged Facts, a market research firm, reported a 30% compound annual growth rate for the gluten-free market from 2006 to 2010. The firm predicts the market will grow to five million by 2015. As a result, there are many great products available for people who choose to be glutenfree. Companies and bakeries make great replacements for items such as cupcakes, bread and pasta. Grocers such as Whole Foods Market, Sprout’s Farmers’ Market and New Leaf Market offer a vast selection of gluten-free products. Restaurant chains such as BJ’s Brewhouse, Old Spaghetti Factory, 28 ACTIVE KIDS
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Olive Garden, P.F. Chang’s, Ruby’s Diner and Red Robin now offer gluten-free options on their menu. Those who adhere to a gluten-free diet to improve health issues should be aware that the body can also cross react to foods the body perceives as similar to gluten. For example, the protein in dairy (specifically cow’s milk) is very similar in structure to gluten and very often cannot be digested properly by gluten intolerant people. To complicate things further, the symptoms of various food intolerances can manifest very differently (such as chronic sinus infections, acne or asthma) making it hard to identify or associate with food intake. This is why it is so important to pay attention to what you are consuming and what problems are manifesting in your body. Many people have drastically improved their health be removing gluten and other inflammatory foods. One of the best ways to identify food intolerance is to implement a full elimination diet removing commonly inflammatory foods, such as wheat, dairy and soy. Testing can be done to help identify food sensitivities but the results can be inaccurate. If you remove a food and feel better, regardless of a “negative” test result, avoid consuming that food. Bottom-line…eat well to feel well.
Chicken Tenders
(Gluten-Free, Dairy-Free, Egg-Free option, Soy-Free) 4 organic boneless, skinless chicken tenders, cut into bite size pieces 4 eggs or egg replacer equivalent, beaten and prepared for dipping 1 cup gluten-free (GF) flour blend 1 medium to large bag potato chips, ground into fine crumbs 1/2 - 1 tsp paprika 1/2 - 1 tsp sea salt 1/4 - 1/2 tsp ground black pepper 1/4 - 1/2 tsp garlic salt 1/8 - 1/4 tsp chili powder (optional) Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Blend flour with seasonings and put into shallow bowl. Prepare egg or egg replacer in another shallow bowl. Crush potato chips and put into yet another shallow bowl. Line the three shallow bowls side by side for dipping. Dip chicken pieces into the flour and then into the egg mixture. Dip into crushed potato chips, cover as thoroughly as possible. Place on baking sheet lined with parchment paper for easy clean up. Bake for ten minutes and then turn over and bake another ten or until chicken reaches 170 degrees. The chicken tenders can also be fried in oil. Kim Rice is a Wellness Coach (coachtothrive.com) and mother of three children in Pleasanton writing and speaking about topics such as autism, depression, diet and life transformation. She facilitates a 30 day cleanse program to help clients lose weight and optimize health. She also coaches parents of children with special needs, such as autism and ADHD, on dietary changes to help optimize brain function and behavior. You can follow her at: Blog - ThrivingGFCF.com, Twitter - Thriving_GFCF Facebook – Thriving gluten and dairy free, YouTube – Kim Rice
The Perils of Replacing Play with Homework by Bonnie Harris When are we going to get it that young children need free and unstructured play in order to learn at their best? More and more kindergartners and even preschoolers are getting academic work and even some to take home. I just returned from London where I ran a number of parent workshops. In one, I was asked by a frustrated mother if I could help her convince her five year old to do his homework. I told her that I couldn’t do that because I am so opposed to young children having any academic work and that homework was the last thing her son should be doing. The whole group supported this mother in resisting the school’s assignments, but she became very worried about what it would mean for her child’s chances to move ahead into the proper schools. Strangely, I hear that most schools are pressured by the parents to give homework at younger and younger ages. I entreat parents to come together to defeat this trend and to stand firm on allowing young children to be just that. Petition your schools to stop homework at least until third grade. And school officials, I plead with you to do what you can to educate yourselves and your parents on the perils of early homework. Among so many similar studies, Peter Gray, an evolutionary psychologist at Boston College said in a 2011 issue of American Journal of Play that free, unstructured play helps children learn how to get along with others and control their emotions, as well as to develop imagination. But that since the 1950s there’s been a steady decline in the time American children spend playing on their own. A study done by Sandra Hofferth of the University of Maryland found that from 1981 to 1997, American kids ages six to eight spent 25 percent less time engaged in free play and 18 percent more time in the classroom. Their homework time increased, by a shocking, 145 percent. Her updated research in 2003 shows play time continuing to decline and study time increasing yet another 32 percent! We must stop this trend for our children’s sake. “If you think of this from the viewpoint of natural selection,” Gray says, “free play is a marvelous biological solution to the big problem that human beings have, which is that we are both selfish and social. We depend on cooperating with other people, and yet we are also looking out for number one. Children are constantly negotiating that balance in their play.” The key for parents, he says, is backing off and letting kids play among themselves. 30 ACTIVE KIDS
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We don’t allow our children to negotiate their play when we supervise, direct, teach, and coach. Think of the time when children could play by themselves all day in a safe neighborhood where all the adults knew and watched out for everyone’s children. Sounds like utopia, doesn’t it. Children could create their play, establish their own rules, and work out who did what without being told how to do it. It’s not hard to think about what that does for a child’s social problem solving skills. I fear that children are forgetting how to play without an adult orchestrating what they do, when and how they do it.
Bonnie Harris, MS Ed, director of Connective Parenting, has been a child behavior and parenting specialist for twenty-five years. Based on her highly acclaimed books, When Your Kids Push Your Buttons and Confident Parents, Remarkable Kids: 8 Principles for Raising Kids You’ll Love to Live, Bonnie counsels parents via phone and skype, teaches parenting workshops, leads professional trainings and speaks internationally. The mother of two grown children, she lives in New Hampshire where she founded The Parent Guidance Center. To learn more, visit her website at www.bonnieharris.com.
September 2012
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Celebrating 75 Years In The Spirit of Giving
2012 Events Sun - 9/9
10k/5k Run/Walk For Education
Sat - 9/15
Twilight Parade
1201 Main St. - Downtown Walnut Creek Help Raise Money For Our Local Schools ! To Register: www.walnutfestivalrun.com
Main Street - Downtown Walnut Creek Free Event Parade starts at 6pm Parade Route is Mt. Diablo to Civic Award Ceremony directly following at Civic Park.
Art & Crafts Thurs - 9/20 Thru Sun 9/23
75th Annual Walnut Festival Heather Farm Park, Walnut Creek Carnival, Fishing 3 Stages of Live Entertainment, Arts & Crafts, Vendors, Kids Zone, Food & Drinks,
For info: www.thewalnutfestival.org
September 2012
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“NO! You can’t make me!” When Kids Resist Something New by Julie King, Parent Educator and “How To Talk” Trainer
This month’s challenge comes from Renee, mother of 5-year-old Jonathan. Here’s how she describes it: Jonathan can get very resistant to going somewhere new. The other day I told him that we were going to visit my friend Ellen and her family after breakfast. We’d never been to her house before -- she has a swimming pool, and a dog, and a son about Jonathan’s age, so I was pretty sure he’d have a great time there. But he started saying that he did not want to go, and I could not convince him he’d have a great time, even though I really tried everything. It went like this: Jonathan: I’m NOT going! You can’t make me! Me: Jonathan, you’ll have a great time there! You can go swimming. You love swimming! Jonathan: No I don’t! I HATE swimming. Me: What do you mean? Don’t you remember when we went to Evan’s house, and I couldn’t get you OUT of the pool when it was time to leave? You had such a great time! Jonathan: No! I hated it! I’m not going! You can’t make me! Me: You did not hate it! And besides, if you don’t want to go in the pool, I’m sure there’s lots more you can do. She has a dog -- you love playing with dogs -- and I’m sure they have lots of toys, too. You’ll have a great time. Jonathan: No, I won’t. I’m not going. Me: I hear that you do not want to go, but I already promised her we’d go over. Besides, I want to visit my friend! You don’t get to decide this one! Jonathan (screaming louder): No, YOU don’t get to decide. I tried everything, but he just kept screaming that he didn’t want to go, and I could not convince him. It ended up being a miserable morning! Sometimes kids can take a while to warm up to a new idea -- anything from a new food, a new shirt, or in this case, a new home to visit. It can be baffling to a parent. When I asked Renee why Jonathan didn’t want to go, she truly did not know. Renee’s goal was not only to get Jonathan to cooperate with the day’s plan to visit her friend, but generally to become more flexible. I suggested that the next time something like this came up, she put into words how Jonathan was feeling. While she didn’t know exactly WHY he didn’t want to visit Ellen’s 34 ACTIVE KIDS
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house, it was very clear he felt strongly -- he did not want to go! The strategy would be for her to reflect this back to him, so he knows she understands, and he starts to learn to identify and articulate his own feelings: “Wow, you feel very strongly that you do NOT want to visit a new house today, even if it does have a swimming pool!” I warned Renee that she may have to listen to a lot of complaints and upset feelings, and she may have to say some variation of this many times before he would be ready to move on (“You are NOT in the mood to visit a new house!” “You do NOT want to go swimming in a new pool today!” “Even though they’ll have a lot of new toys, you would much rather stay home today!”). It would be especially challenging to say this with genuine feeling. Of course, we wondered when Renee would get a chance to try this strategy out. It didn’t take long! Here’s what she reported when we spoke again: Sunday night I told Jonathan that he’d be starting a new camp in the morning. He started screaming and crying. Instead of trying to convince him that it would be great -- which is what I usually would have done -- I just kept reflecting his feelings for what seemed like forever. Me: You don’t like that idea. You don’t want to start a new camp. Jonathan: No! I’m not going! Me: You wish you could go back to Adventure Camp! You loved that camp! (That was his old camp, which he really loved, but it was over.) Jonathan: Yeah! Me: I bet you wish you could go to Adventure Camp forever and ever! They should never have closed that camp! Jonathan: Yeah! They should have it for the whole summer! At this point he was still crying, and he climbed into my lap. Me: And then you would never have to go to a new camp. You would always know what to expect, and you would always have a great time, and you would always have Tom for a counselor! Jonathan: And Andy would be there, too! Me: It can feel scary going to a new camp. You don’t know who’s going to be there. You don’t know what to expect. Jonathan (crying, nods his head): Mm-hmm! We went on like this for so long I almost wanted to say, “OK, now you’re done.” But I just let him keep crying in my arms. And finally he said: “OK, I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” I have to admit it was really hard to stick it out the way you suggested! But I’m so glad we did, because the next day, when we got to his new camp, he just ran off with his counselor as soon as we got there! It was amazing! I guess he really did need to have a good cry about his favorite camp ending. Sometimes we don’t know WHY our child is so resistant to trying something new. In this case it seems that Jonathan needed to mourn the end of a favorite September 2012
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camp, with wonderful counselors, and he couldn’t move on to accepting a new camp until he had had a long cry in the arms of an understanding parent. By putting into words his strong feelings, and holding him and letting him cry until he was done, Renee helped him move on -- and saved herself from another miserable morning.
Strategy: Put into words how your child is feeling. Say it like you mean it!
Don’t try to talk them out of it, or explain why they shouldn’t feel this way.
Tip: You may be ready for him to move on long before he is able to. If your child is expressing a difficult feeling, or something that’s been pent up for a while, it may take a long time to let it all out. Hang in there!
Could you use a new strategy for an everyday challenge with your kids? Contact Julie to become the subject for next month’s advice column. All names changed to protect the frazzled!
JULIE KING is a Parent Educator and “How To Talk” Trainer in the Bay Area. She offers private consultations in person and by phone. Mention this column for 20% off your first consultation! If you are interested in participating in her most popular workshop, “How To Talk So Kids Will Listen,” contact her now. She is also available for Parent Education evenings and workshops for self-organized groups. Contact Julie at 415-939-3553 or julie@julieking.org. For more information, visit www.julieking.org.
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Sleep for Sale by Robin O’Bryant I don’t understand how anybody’s “baby,” that is to say their youngest child, is ever anything but rotten. I marvel at my husband’s brother. In addition to being one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met, Zack is the youngest of five, an accomplished musician and former Marine, putting himself through college. I stare in wonder at my younger sister’s sweet disposition and selfdiscipline. Blair is the youngest of my siblings and yet she is not a raving lunatic. And I pray that somehow, someway, Blair and Zack are not freaks of nature or flukes. Because I’m finding in myself a deep seeded weariness in raising my “baby” that wasn’t there when the other two were staying at home. I’m just so freaking tired. All of the time. I tell her to clean up but she knows I don’t mean it the first time. I send her to bed but she knows I’m a sucker for “one more kiss and a hug.” I referee fights between Sadie and her two older sisters but don’t follow through every single time like I would have with Aubrey and Emma. I can’t. I simply don’t have the energy. Recently, I was collapsed on the couch after returning from a work trip. Emma came running into the room crying, “Momma!! Sadie bit me!!” “I’m sorry.” Lame. I am so lame. “Do something about it! She BIT ME!” Emma wailed. I will say she was having to work really hard to produce tears and there were no teeth marks that I could see. “Put her on timeout! DO something!” Moving off the couch seemed nearly impossible. “Okay. Will you go get her?” Sadie, the unsuspecting baby that she is, came on the first attempt where I did actually get off the couch to put her in the corner. This week brought a new parenting low. I’m not as young as I was when I started this whole parenting debacle eight years ago and I just want to sleep. For the love of God, I just want to lay down and go to sleep without anyone yelling at me. Sadie knows I am weak and can drag out her bedtime monologue for hours. She cries, she fake cries. She uses the toddler ‘Get Out of Jail Free’ card — “I have to go potty!” But her favorite complaint at bedtime is, “I don’t wanna be alone!! I don’t wanna be alone!!”
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Now before you start feeling sorry for her, you need to know that both of her sisters have offered repeatedly to sleep with her. Not only have they tried to let her sleep in their room with them, at one time or another each of them has crawled into Sadie’s bed to comfort her at night. And we have all learned the same thing. Sadie is a scam artist. As soon as someone gets into the bed with her, it’s party time. She jumps on the bed, sings at the top of her lungs and acts like a total lunatic. Every co-sleeping adventure ends the same way— with one of her sisters coming to me and saying, “Sadie is driving me nuts. I just want to go to sleep.” Last week I put Sadie down for a much needed nap and she started up the same song, 1000th verse, “I DON’T WANT TO BE ALONE!! WAH! WAH! I DON’T WANT TO BE ALONE!” At my breaking point after several weeks of travel, some with my kids and some without, I stuck my head in her bedroom door and snapped, “I”ll give you a quarter if you quit saying that.” Then, magically? Silence. I’d have been appalled by the very idea of purchasing sleep from my older kids but at this point, I’m willing to do what it takes. At least if she turns out completely rotten she’ll have enough money set aside for bail.
Robin O’Bryant is a syndicated humor columnist and stay-at-home-mom to three daughters born within four years. She finally figured out where babies come from and got herself under control. Her first book, “Ketchup is a Vegetable and Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves,” is rated #1 by reader reviews on Amazon in two genres: Humor Essays and Parenting & Families. Visit her at www.robinschicks.com. Robin’s Chicks to learn helpful tips such as: how to breastfeed behind your back*, how to talk to your daughters about man parts, and how to write a proper gold fish obituary. *Only applies to lactating women with a DD cup or larger.
William Schlicher, DMD, MS Dr. Will is dedicated to providing your family with exceptional treatment in a modern, professional & comfortable office. • Specialized orthodontics for children & adults • Complimentary initial consultation • In- office digital xray imaging reducing radiation by 50% • Esthetic options include Invisalign, ceramic “clear” braces, & braces behind the teeth • Trained at Harvard & UC San Francisco
September 2012
www.PleasantonOrtho.com
(925) 846-3248
1472 Cedarwood Ln., Pleasanton ACTIVE KIDS 39
Fenced and Gated Parks Berkeley Aquatic Park – 80 Bolivar Drive (Bancroft between University/Ashby) Castro Valley Parsons Park (top of Almond and Walnut Roads)
Castro Valley Community Park – 18988 Lake Chabot Road
Brook Street & Moraga Road
Concord Hillcrest Park – 2086 Olivera Rd Dublin Bray Commons – 3300 Finnian Way (at Keegan) Hayward D Street Playground (between Foothill & Mission) Pleasant Hill Gregory Lane & Cleaveland Lafayette 500 St. Mary’s Road (behind Community Center)
Lafayette Resevoir San Leandro Halycon Park – 1245 147th Avenue AK_AD_2.2x3.7_081112.pdf Santa Cruz Frederick Street (by the Marina – great views)
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S The Best Preparation for a Lifetime of Learning S
Infinite Poßßibilitieß . . .
Join us for an Open House and discover why. 012 2 , 7 2 er .m. Octob to 1:00 p a.m. 10:00
Join us for an Open House and learn more about our curriculum and how we nurture the inquisitive and creative nature of children in a positive learning environment. Danville Sycamore Valley
Fremont Curtis
Next to East Bay Fellowship Church
(510) 438-9745
2615 Camino Tassajara Rd.
(925) 648-0500
S Nurturing, Safe
5301 Curtis Street
Environment
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Fremont Middle School
Danville Blackhawk
3201 Camino Tassajara Rd.
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5301 Curtis Street
Corner of Old Blackhawk Road
Science & Spanish
(510) 438-9745
(925) 648-4900
S Enriching Social
Fremont Boulevard
Pleasanton
Development
38495 Fremont Boulevard
4576 Willow Road
(510) 713-8900 ASSOCIAT I
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Accrediting Commission for Schools
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Learn Something New by Christine Carter Your kids are back in school; should you be, too? Will taking a class make you happier? Or will it just make you feel busier? Will it help you raise happy kids? That depends. Do you love learning? If so, you might want to take a class. Here’s why: • Our brains grow and change throughout adulthood depending on what we do with them. Do a lot of math, and the part of your brain that processes math will get bigger. Do stuff that makes you feel calm and happy, and that brain region will enlarge. (That’s a bit of an over-simplication, as you neuroscience-types know. But it is true: change your behavior and you change your brain!) • People who’ve received training in stress reduction techniques (e.g., have taken a yoga class) really do experience less stress in life, and less stress equals greater happiness. In addition, research shows that parents’ stressmanagement affects children in a big way. Read more about stress-free parenting in my Greater Good blog this week. • Parenting classes work. According to researcher Robert Epstein, “Parents who have taken parenting classes produce better outcomes with their children than parents who lack such training, and…more training leads to better outcomes.” Haven’t taken a parenting class since Lamaze? Might be time to brush up. When we want to improve our own happiness, or our kids’ well-being, a little training can go a long way. I can learn a lot by reading a book, but the insights I glean are only helpful to the extent that I’m able to integrate it into my life and practices. A good class will: • Provide you with insights and inspiration to make changes • Help you integrate insights into your everyday life through specific behaviors • Guide you in practicing making small changes over time I’m pretty darn busy, but I am nearly always enrolled in a class of some sort because I like the structure of learning something new with a teacher. And as a
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single mom who works full-time, I’m really grateful for all of the wonderful online classes available that allow me to learn and practice on my own time. Take Action: Sign up for a parenting, happiness, or stress-reduction class today! Get yourself to yoga, or join a meditation group. Spend some time learning something new!
Christine Carter, Ph.D.*, is a sociologist and happiness expert at UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center. She is the author of “RAISING HAPPINESS: 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents.” She teaches online happiness classes that help parents bring more joy into their own lives and the lives of their children, and she writes an award-winning blog for *Greater Good* (www.greatergoodparents.org). “Sign up now with promotional code ActiveKids, and get $25 off the cost of the class!”
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Bright Horizons Unlock your child's potential CURRICULUM NIGHT Various evenings and locations throughout September and October Join us for an in-depth exploration of our curriculum Multiple locations in the Bay Area Offering high quality early education Visit www.brighthorizons.com/curriculumnight2012_bayarea for more information.
Visit during Curriculum Night to Learn More • Meet our teachers and connect with other families • See the developmental progression of learning for each age group • View Bright Learner, our assessment tool for children's development
Daily offers for moms, by moms up to
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EDGE SOCCER ACADEMY
TRI-VALLEY’S ELITE SOCCER PROGRAM! For beginning to advanced soccer players ages 3-16 who want to learn how to play and master the game of soccer!
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From the staff at Active Kids, we hope everyone has a wonderful school year full of FUN and lasting memories!
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Kids Meal Deals!
Find kidʼs meal deals & kids eat free restaurants in your area.
Alameda County Alameda:
Bower's Pizza: 1330 Park St., 510.523.7500
Tuesday: Order one large specialty pizza, get one small pizza free.
Dublin:
Armadillo Willy's: 4480 Tassajara Rd,
925.833.0400, Sunday: 1/2 price kids meals all day. Baja Fresh: 4550 Tassajara Rd #1, 925.556.9199 Sundays: Kids eat free with the purchase of an adult entrée and drink.
Livermore:
Strings Italian Café: 2205 Las Positas Rd 925.373.1044, Sunday & Monday: Kids eat free with adult meal purchase after 4:00 PM. Denny's: 2259 Las Positas Rd, 925.454.0750, Tuesdays & Saturdays: Kids eat free 4:00 PM -10:00 PM (2 kids/adult). Alberto's Cantina: 435 Main St., 925.462.2316 Monday & Tuesday: Kids eat free with adult meal purchase (all day).
El Torito: 1961 Diamond Blvd, 925.798.7660 Saturday: Kids eat free until 3:00 PM. Johnny Rockets: 301 Sunvalley Mall, 925.798.8335, Wednesday & Thursday: Kids eat free, 5:00 PM to close.
Danville:
El Nido Mexican Restaurant:
107 Town & Country Dr, 925.820.5330, Monday: Kids eat free with adult meal purchase (5:00 PM - 9:00 PM). Pasta Gondola: 664 San Ramon Valley Blvd, 925.820.1144, Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday: Kids eat free with the purchase of adult entrée, 5:00 PM-9:00PM. Basil Leaf Café: 501 Hartz Ave, 925.831.2828 Sunday: Kids eat free. Denny's: 807 Camino Ramon, 925.820.8240, Tuesday & Saturday: Kids eat free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM, (2kids/adult). Mountain Mikes Pizza: 3614 Diablo Blvd, 925.283.6363, Wednesday: Free kids all you can eat buffet (12 & under) with the purchase of an adult buffet. Offer valid from 5:00 PM - 8:00 PM.
Pleasanton:
Martinez:
925.426.6800, Sunday & Monday: Kids eat free with adult meal purchase, all day. Denny's: 6455 Owens Dr., 925.463.0720, Tuesday & Saturday: Kids eat free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM, (2 kids/adult). Fontina Ristorante: 349 Main St., Suite 150 925.462.9299, Monday & Tuesday - Kids eat free with the purchase of an adult entrée (for kids 12 & under) after 4:00 PM.
Sunday Kids eat free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM; limited to one child per adult.
Dickey's Barbecue Pit: 6654 Koll Center Parkway
Contra Costa County
Concord:
Fudruckers: 1975 Diamond Blvd, 925.825.1443 Sunday - Saturday: Kids eat for$0.99 from 4:00 PM to 9:00 PM. Denny's: 1313 Willow Pass Rd, 925.798.4040 Tuesday & Saturday: Kids eat free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM (2 kids/adult). IHOP: 4619 Clayton Rd, 925.687.1124, Sunday Saturday: Kids eat for free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM; limited to one child per adult. Coco's Bakery Restaurant: 4391 Treat Blvd 925.676.2262, Tuesday & Wednesday: Kids 10 and under eat free after 4:00 PM.
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IHOP: 1190 Arnold Dr, 925.228.3322, Saturday-
Pleasant Hill:
Pasta Pomodoro: 45 Crecent Dr, 925.363.9541,
Tuesday: 1 free kids meal per adult entrée purchase. All day. Smokin Okie's BBQ Joint: 1941 Oak Park Blvd, 925.942.0149, Wednesday: 1 free kids meal per adult meal purchases (all day for kids 12 and under). Denny's: 612 Contra Costa Blvd, 925.687.8276, Tuesday & Saturday: Kids eat free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM, (2 kids/adult). Sweet Tomatoes: 40-A Crescent Dr, 925.676.8493, Sunday - Saturday: Kids 2 & under eat free all day.
San Ramon:
Chevy's Fresh Mex: 8080 San Ramon Valley
Blvd, 925.327.1910, Tuesday: Kids eat free all day. Limit one child per adult. Ages 12 & under. Applebee's:17900 San Ramon Valley Blvd, 925.327.1400 Wednesday: Kids eat for $1.99 with the purchase of an adult entrée from 5:00 PM to 9:00 PM; limited to one child per adult.
www.activekidsbayarea.com
Kids Meal Deals!
cont. Find kidʼs meal deals & kids eat free restaurants in your area. Pasta Pomodoro:146 Sunset Dr. , 925.867.1407, Tuesday: 1 free kids meal per adult meal purchase, all day.
Walnut Creek:
Fudruckers: 1940 North Main St., 925.943.1450, Sunday - Saturday: Kids eat for $0.99 from 4:00 PM to 9:00 PM. IHOP: 2910 North Main St.,925.938.3111, Sunday - Saturday: Kids eat for free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM; limited to one child per adult.
Brentwood:
Shirasoni Japanese Restaurant: 6367 Lone Tree Way, 925.240.7808, Tuesday Specials: 1 free kids meal per adult meal purchased 4:30-Close. Strings Italian Café: 2500 San Creek Rd, 925.513.6513, Sunday & Monday: Kids eat free with adult meal purchase after 4:00 PM.
Oakley:
Black Bear Diner: 3201 Main St.,
925.625.3555, Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday: Kids eat free with the purchase of adult entrée, 4:00 PM - 7:00 PM.
East County Antioch:
Denny's: 2006 Somersville Rd, 925.754.1360
Tuesday & Saturday: Kids eat free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM, (2 kids/adult). Denny's: 4823 Lone Tree Way, 925.757.5105 Tuesdays & Saturdays: Kids eat free 4:00 PM - 10:00 PM (2 kids/adult).
*Special offers may expire or change at restaurant discretion. Call to confirm current specials.
Summer fun for everyone! College Nannies are educated, active role models. There is simply no substitute for someone who can really engage and have fun with your children. When the kids are well cared for and having fun, parents are relaxed and happy. Fun, for everyone! Full-time | Part-time | Occasional Help
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Life Begins at ValleyCare G
iving birth is one of life’s most joyous experiences. That’s why our physicians make your health and comfort, and the health of your baby their top priority. Along with our advanced treatment capabilities, our physicians, nurses, and specialists provide you and your baby with the support and encouragement needed to make your birth experience a memory you’ll always treasure.
ValleyCare Medical Foundation OB/GYNs Scott D. Eaton, MD John Nunes, MD William Phillips, MD Jennifer Salata, MD* Sonia Santana, DO Gabrielle Schaefer, MD Laura Silverstein, MD* Nicole Jeffrey-Starr, MD Rebecca Stone, MD* *Coming in September
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