Spanking to Discipline Children

1 Spanking to Discipline Children Disciplining children is the process of teaching them to distinguish between right and wrong behavior. For many parents, deciding on the best method of discipline is one of the most challenging responsibilities of raising a child because it requires deliberate and consistent effort to eliminate bad behavior. Harsh and excessive methods of discipline have the potential to affect the child, therefore, the parent should be conscious of the effect that the applied strategy has on the child. There are various methods of disciplining children; among all of them, spanking is one of the most contentious. Spanking is the act of deliberately causing physical pain to a child in order to discourage them from unwanted. While some people believe that spanking is an effective method of disciplining a child, others believe that it amounts to corporal punishment and it is wrong. Essentially, the proponents and opponents of spanking use different measures to analyze the effectiveness of the discipline strategy.

In the past, spanking was considered an acceptable many countries and cultures; today, however, is increasing debate about all the acceptability of forms of physical punishment.

Corporal punishment is banned in approximately 54 countries and the number will continue to grow as parents, caregivers and medical practitioners become more enlightened on other more effective discipline strategies. In 2018, the American Academy of Pediatrics added weight to this debate by stating that parents should avoid any form of physical punishment when disciplining their children. This paper examines the merits and demerits of spanking, and asserts its position on the debate.

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2 Arguments against Spanking There is sufficient evidence to show that spanking has negative effects on children.

Parents usually use it as a discipline strategy out of frustration and anger, which does very little to teach the child why their behavior is wrong (Straus, Douglas, & Medeiros, 2013). Studies show that while spanking might stop a child’s bad behavior in the short-term, in the long-run it may cause anti-social behavior, increase their aggression, and be detrimental to their mental health. Children who are spanked are more likely to fail in school, have a lower than normal level of empathy and demonstrate inability to regulate their emotions. There are also studies that show that spanking can lead to a reduction of gray matter in the brain. Children who have been spanked learn to use aggression as a tool of releasing their frustration, and there is a risk that they might become perpetrators of domestic violence in adulthood.

Parents who spank their children often expect that it will help to reform the child’s behavior but it is a short-term method of behavior correction that does not teach self-regulation, therefore has no long-term benefits. Real behavior change comes from being able to distinguish between right and wrong, and learning the concept of self-regulation. Decades worth of research have proved that spanking is ineffective; children learn best from their parents’ positive rolemodeling and making a deliberate effort to guide them. In most cases where spanking is used, it occurs impulsively and emotionally, without giving the child an opportunity to understand why their behavior is wrong. Therefore, they have no reason, other than the fear of physical pain, to demonstrate good behavior. As a result, children who are spanked are more likely to be sneaky since their choices are guided by fear of being caught engaging in the unwanted behavior, as opposed to having a clear sense of right and wrong.

Arguments for Spanking

3 Proponents of spanking believe that when done well, it has the potential to make the child associate the unwanted behavior with physical pain, thus leading to immediate and also longlasting behavior change. Some studies claim that when spanking is administered in a controlled and loving environment, it can be effective (Thompson, & Thompson, 2011). Children enter the world without the ability to truly understand the concept of behavior and consequences and to control their behavior, thus, they need a lot of guidance from their caregivers. Spanking should only be administered after evaluating all other forms of discipline and determining that it is the most appropriate for the misbehavior at hand. There are few cases where spanking is considered appropriate; these are, in cases of willful disobedience and extreme defiance of authority.

Physical punishment should not be meted against a child whose misbehavior is simply out of childish ignorance and irresponsibility. Additionally, it should only be used on young children, never infants, pre-adolescents or adolescents. As children become older, its effectiveness deteriorates and its continued usage will only intensify the undesired behavior. For spanking to be effective in the long-run as well, it should never be administered harshly, impulsively or violently. The parent should take the time to talk to the child before or after the spanking, to help them understand that they are still loved.

Spanking may be effective when the parent’s motive is to teach the child with love as opposed to merely making them afraid to commit the undesired actions. Parents who intend to use spanking must therefore learn to make a distinction between discipline and punishment.

Punishment is harsh, motivated by anger and unforgiving of past mistakes. After punishment, the child feels guilty, ashamed and hostile. Discipline is different. It focuses on helping the child change not only in the short-term and also in the future. It should result in an obedient, secure and well-adjusted child (Ockwell-Smith, 2017).

4 Evaluation of Critical Thinking The objective of disciplining a child is to help them learn, to replace their poor behavior with good behavior and to equip them with better life skills. Spanking a child does teach them any useful skill or lesson. Spanking, in reality, is a form of abuse that predisposes the child to other forms of abuse not only in the present, but also later in life. It is a violent form of discipline because it inflicts pain on the child, with the hope that they will learn good behavior and develop sound moral judgment from it. However, it is ironic and even abusive to use violence with the expectation that the child will change their behavior and at the same time, decipher that they are loved and cared for. Disciplining a child through spanking sends the message that when they are frustrated with someone, they can hit them to get what they want. Children who are taught that physical pain can be used as a tool of teaching behavior have a higher likelihood of demonstrating the same actions on their peers. Parents have a responsibility to model good problem-solving and conflict resolution skills.

Children have a right to feel safe and protected, which translates to receiving discipline in a manner that does not contravene these rights. Spanking is a confusing mode of discipline because it teaches the child that someone who loves them has the right to cross their physical boundaries and instill physical pain on them. In future, this may increase their vulnerability to abusive relationships. Spanking is an authoritative form of parenting that increases the distance between the parent and the child. When the parent is spanking the child, they are often angry and frustrated, and this teaches the child to fear not only the parent but also other forms of authority.

This is dangerous because when a child learns to fear early in life, their idea of a safe and loving space becomes distorted, leading to trauma, emotional vulnerability and mental illness.

5 There is sufficient research to prove that spanking is directly linked to poor social, developmental and mental health outcomes. On the other hand, there is no research to prove that spanking yields any benefits on children. . It is a severe punishment that is not even used on people who have broken the law; so why should it be used on children? There are several more effective discipline strategies that do not involve inflicting physical pain on the child which the parent should exhaust before considering spanking.

People who say that spanking may be effective when administered in a safe and controlled environment are merely speaking from their personal opinions of the topic and not well-documented scientific research. Children are like a blank canvas, they lack the ability to make accurate judgments of what is right and wrong because they do not have well-developed moral values. It is the responsibility of the parent to patiently and deliberately train the child, using appropriate methods of behavior correction. Children have a right to grow up in a safe and loving environment where they respect their parents and caregivers, as opposed to fearing them (Gwinn, 2015). Spanking children teaches them that it is acceptable to hit someone to get their way, and it also hinders them from learning to resolve negative emotions in a healthy way.

There are several methods of disciplining a child that are more effective than spanking and other forms of corporal punishment. For instance, being clear and consistent about the rules is one of the ways the parent may teach their child to distinguish between right and wrong.

Rewarding good behavior also teaches the child to do the right thing. It is also imperative to model good behavior that is worth emulating.

Conclusion Ultimately, the decision whether to spank or use other discipline methods, falls on the parent. However, I believe that every child has a right to learn to distinguish between right and

6 wrong in a manner that does not pose a threat to their physical, emotional or mental wellbeing.

Spanking the child, even when done ‘out of love’ is wrong because it teaches the child to fear rather than offering them a healthy environment to learn to self-regulate. This analysis is based on well-researched evidence that has further reaffirmed by belief that spanking is not a beneficial discipline strategy.

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References Gwinn, C. (2015). Cheering for the Children: Creating Pathways to HOPE for Children Exposed to Trauma. Wheatmark, Inc. Ockwell-Smith, S. (2017). Gentle Discipline: Using Emotional Connection--Not Punishment--to Raise Confident, Capable Kids. Penguin Publishing Group.

Straus, M.A., Douglas, E.M., & Medeiros, R. (2013). The Primordial Violence: Spanking Children, Psychological Development, Violence, and Crime. Routledge.

Thompson, P. & Thompson, B. (2011). Spank Your Child, Please!: A Book About Children by Former Child, Patrick Thompson. Createspace Independent Pub Webster-Stratton, C. (2019). The Incredible Years®: Trouble Shooting Guide for Parents of Children Aged 3-8 Years. Incredible Years Press