Inlander 01/18/2018

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INSIDE VOL. 25, NO. 13 | COVER PHOTO: YOUNG KWAK

COMMENT 5 NEWS 13 COVER STORY 22

CULTURE 35 FOOD 40 FILM 44

MUSIC 48 EVENTS 52 GREEN ZONE 56

EDITOR’S NOTE

F

inally, something we can agree on: BURGERS are quite possibly the perfect super food, and they need not all look or taste the same to be welcome to this particular party. Indeed, our seasoned food editor, Chey Scott, and her team of writers have documented the entire burger spectrum for this week’s issue — covering everything from the region’s classic bargain burgers to those high-end works of food art that you won’t soon forget. Full coverage begins on page 22.

Also this week: News reporter Samantha Wohlfeil digs into efforts in Olympia to tackle carbon and climate-change issues (page 20), and in Culture, contributor E.J. Iannelli previews the Spokane Civic Theatre’s unique staging of the classic Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (page 35). — JACOB H. FRIES, Editor

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RASHEL ROGERS

Handmade bun. Really high-end meat.

Medium-well. Oh, it’s going to be a stuffed patty, onions and barbecue sauce mixed in.

Probably like two different kinds of cheese: Gorgonzola. Havarti.

Derek Harrison (x248) ART DIRECTOR

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CAITLYN BRENNAN

I don’t eat meat, so: veggie burger.

What makes a good veggie burger?

Obviously fresh vegetables: tomatoes, lettuce, onions. I don’t like avocado, but it sounds good on it.

Wait, you don’t like avocado, but other people do, so you want your dream burger to be enjoyed by them?

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LANDON STRAWN

Guacamole. And like, pickles. It would have red meat — just a regular burger. I think it’s 70/30.

With the juice running down on everything.

And [portobello] mushrooms. Mushrooms are great.

Why do you like guacamole?

It’s creamy. Flavorful. Everybody likes avocados.

NICK SCHWARTZE

OK. So it is made out of Beyond Meat: It’s the “burger that bleeds.” It’s only available in five restaurants in the country. It’s a plant-based burger, but it tastes and looks and smells just like real meat.

Why is it important that your burger “bleed?”

Because it’s a visceral, primal feeling you get. I try to eat plant-based as much as possible. But sometimes you really crave that real beef.

Burger Guide in the

TANNER DANIEL

My dream burger? Really. Alright. Start it out with with an elk patty. Pepper jack cheese.

Bacon. Onions. Red onions though! Pickles, ketchup. What kind of bun…?

There are onion buns, whole wheat buns...

Just a regular one with the little seeds on the top of them.

Sesame seeds?

A sesame seed bun.

INTERVIEWS BY DANIEL WALTERS RIVER PARK SQUARE FOOD COURT, 1/15/18

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COMMENT | INEQUALITY

‘A Great Curse’ Tax cuts like we just passed are “the root of all evils,” according to conservative thinkers of earlier times

BY ROBERT HEROLD

T

he ratio of CEO income to worker income has never been greater: It now approaches 300-to-1. And it’s about to get much worse, courtesy of Donald Trump and his obsequious Congress, which includes the evercompliant Cathy McMorris Rodgers.

Their tax bill was never subjected to hearings; instead, it was rammed through against the advice of the Congressional Budget Office, which estimates it will add upwards of $2 trillion to the national debt. McMorris Rodgers and her fellow Republicans have taken a bad situation and made it much worse by passing a bill designed primarily to appease wealthy donors.

Some say not to worry about inequality — that trickle-down economics will take care of all such problems. Sorry, but even Arthur Laffer, the father of the so-called Laffer Curve, doesn’t believe that, having acknowledged that beyond a certain point — reached long ago — more tax cuts just add to inequality while doing nothing for the general health of the country.

“I pledge allegiance to the United States of America and to the plutocracy for which it stands.” That would seem the dismal truth of the matter.

A

s to the impact inequality has on the body politic, surprisingly enough I can do no better than refer to words of one of the original Mormon Apostles, Orson Pratt, who once stated: “An inequality of property is the root and foundation of innumerable evils; it tends to derision, and to keep asunder the social feelings that should exist among the people of God. It is a principle originated in hell; it is the root of all evils. It is inequality in riches that is a great curse.”

The many conservative Mormons who are still lock-step supportive of Trump might want to brush up on their own church’s history. Until the death of Brigham Young in 1877, the LDS church was progressively communitarian.

Another surprise: The New Deal was also brought about by a Mormon, Marriner Eccles, for whom the Federal Reserve Building in Washington, D.C., is named. John Kenneth Galbraith put it directly: “Marriner Eccles invented the New Deal.”

His mother, the polygamous second wife of David Eccles, inherited from her late husband small banks in Utah but had no idea how to run them. She relied on her young son Marriner, who had what amounted to a freshman college education. Seems he had a knack for the business and was doing well until the Depression hit.

Unlike today’s plutocrats, Eccles felt responsibility towards his banks, his community and his customers. Not one of Eccles’ banks failed. He

brought to banking the radical idea that what we need is a consumption economy requiring a modicum of equality, fair pay and, sometimes, pump-priming, which could require deficit spending. FDR’s staff urged Roosevelt to buy into Eccles ideas, which he eventually did. Thus the New Deal.

T

he Republicans who voted to institutionalize plutocracy don’t believe in priming the pump, they don’t believe in responsibility to the public, and for certain they don’t believe that there is anything morally wrong or even bothersome about gross inequality. It’s perfidy writ large.

As Trump did to Hillary Clinton, they deflect their intentions and agenda through use of the “big smear.” It’s nothing new, as we remember what the paranoid Republicans called the Democrats back in the early 1950s — the K1C2 Party, for “Korea, Communism and Corruption.”

(Drat! Once elected, even Ike sold out, as he went to Korea and signed off on the exact armistice deal that Harry Truman had negotiated, much to the dismay of his hard-line supporters.)

Trump’s GOP — and it is Trump’s GOP now — might be renamed the Three P’s party, for “Plutocracy, Perfidy and Paranoia.”

Finally, three revealing footnotes:  With an opioid crisis raging in the nation, what does Trump’s man Jeff Sessions do? Instead of focusing on this very real problem, he declares war on marijuana farmers. It puts me in mind of what Harry Truman said back 1948 at his Kiel Auditorium campaign speech in St. Louis: “Any farmer who votes Republican needs his head examined.” And where is our congresswoman on this matter?  Oh, and mark my words: When the predicted tsunami deficit arrives, the GOP won’t deal with it by trying to increase revenue; they will seek further cuts to community and social service programs. Medicaid will be at the top of the list of programs to be cut or, better yet, destroyed. They will try to use their self-inflicted deficits to do to the Affordable Care Act indirectly what they couldn’t do directly.  Some congressional Republicans are trying to come to the president’s rescue on the Russia investigation. They all have a serious moral question to answer: What’s more important, this deeply flawed president, or the Constitution they have pledged to uphold? It should be an easy question to answer, but in the Three P’s Party, who knows? n

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A nonpartisan event to harness the power of women in the community to create positive social change, and to encourage women to run for political office. Also includes opportunities for women and men to take action on issues of education, health care and human rights. Sat, Jan. 20 from noon-3 pm. Starts at Sandpoint Middle School, 310 S. Division St. bec3holland@ gmail.com

RHETORIC IN THE RING IV: KIDS VS COURTS

An event to raise funds and awareness for the Rogers High School Speech and Debate Club, and featuring two Spokane District Court judges stepping into the boxing ring to take on two Rogers High School senior debate students. Tue, Jan. 23 from 5:30-6:30 pm. Free, donations accepted. Howard Street Boxing Club, 165 S. Howard. bit.ly/2DjFren

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The Lands Council, along with the Center for Justice, KYRS Community Radio, and Gonzaga Environmental Law, present a screening of the film providing a detailed account of what went wrong during the summer of 2016 that led to the decimation one of Washington’s recovering wolf packs. Tue, Jan. 23 at 6:30 pm. Free and open to the public. Gonzaga University School of Law, 721 N. Cincinnati St. bit.ly/2rfyl54 n Tell us about your event or other opportunities to get involved. Submit events at Inlander.com/getlisted or email getlisted@inlander.com.

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COMMENT | LABEL it tomorrow.

If only these failures to realize a better future for ourselves were constrained to our waistlines and our wallets.

But the same mistakes also get played out collectively through our public policy.

Most of the problems we face require long-term solutions — consistent, persistent action over years or decades.

Whether we’re combating drug addiction, providing affordable housing to all, or increasing college graduation rates, we must act boldly now to achieve big results later.

For example, studies suggest that some of the biggest increases in college attendance can be driven by providing kids with effective pre-K instruction — albeit with a 16-year lag time. But instead of facing the reality that changing reality takes time, we look for shortcuts.

Happiness now often wins over happiness in the future.

CALEB WALSH ILLUSTRATION

The Long Run Why quick fixes and short-term thinking inevitably lead to failure

BY JOHN T. REUTER

N

ew Year’s resolutions don’t have the best track record.

Sadly, most of us are unable to maintain our pledges to eat healthier, exercise more or increase our savings. In fact, the internet tells me that only 8 percent of us manage to keep our resolutions and most fail within the first few weeks.

Our high rate of failure is a bit odd. I mean, why are we so abysmal at doing the things that we’ve personally chosen to prioritize? We’ve determined these are actions that would give us a better life and yet, year after year,

we can’t manage to pull them off.

We all, of course, innately know why. The payoff for maintaining these actions exists in the future, while the reward of chocolate cake or a lazy day of watching Netflix or a shopping spree is immediate. Happiness now often wins over happiness in the future.

Sadly, the future has a way, over time, of becoming the present. Our decisions catch up with us and for brief crystallizing moments, as the New Year is rung in, we declare that we will do better for the next version of ourselves. And so we continue an ever repeating cycle of broken pledges; a hamster on a wheel — or rather a hamster sitting next to unused wheel, promising to get on

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Whether through tax cuts or large stimulus spending, we try to convince ourselves that short-term policies with immediate impacts will, through trickle down or ripple effects, take us to the long-term prosperity we seek. They never do, instead just offering the equivalent of the sugar rush from that resolution-breaking piece of chocolate cake.

However, this simple truth that long-term progress requires a series of actions over the long-term is frequently misappropriated by the existing establishment. They suggest bold action is foolhardy and that the current method of numbingly slow progress is the only way.

But just as exercise can be exhilarating and create a positive loop well before the goal weight is ever reached, the positive results of an effective, long-term policy can be felt decades before its ultimate end is reached.

Generally, most policies aimed at long-term progress will be aimed at children. They are literally our society’s next self. In them, we can see and measure progress.

Increased literacy in early grades eventually becomes increased college graduation rates. Increased access to medical care and healthy foods eventually becomes increased lifespans.

We must, of course, care about people beyond childhood. But early interventions, when kept to steadily like New Year’s resolutions, can change our future. Unfortunately, we have to find a way to consistently keep at more than a measly 8 percent of them. n

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COMMENT | FROM READERS

GET r.REAL, GEORGE Nethercutt seems to have developed his post-congressional edito-

M

rial career advocating for compromise and cooperation on Capitol Hill, which is all well and good — we are in desperate need of both.

His New Year’s resolution column (“Resolution Time,” 1/11/18), however, reads like a laundry-list of half-baked ideas: The president should tweet less (duh); we should avoid nuclear war with North Korea because it “would change for the worse the political landscape, to say little of death and destruction for all nations” (you don’t say!); and members of Congress should spend less time fundraising. (I guess he never heard of the Citizens United decision.)

The resolution that really caught my eye was one sentence tossed in at the end: that congressional Democrats ought to drop their general antiTrump stance and vote with Republicans, ostensibly to improve cooperation in Congress.

What struck me most about this resolution is that there is no complementary resolution for Republicans to be similarly conciliatory. Tossing in an aside urging Democrats to be more cooperative during a time when the values and principles Democrats believe in and advocate for are being dismantled is extremely patronizing and illustrates Mr. Nethercutt’s ignorance LETTERS of the current political climate.

Send comments to I wonder if Mr. Nethercutt has editor@inlander.com. forgotten the extreme hostility harbored by the Republican Party toward Barack Obama, which manifested as obstructionism in Congress the likes of which had never been seen before. But now that the roles have reversed, the Democrats should just abandon their values and principles and capitulate!

Nobody sensible is advocating that members of Congress be at each other’s throats. That’s not how to govern effectively. But Mr. Nethercutt is guilty of dismissing Democrats’ values while simultaneously instructing them how to legislate, and that kind of unempathetic attitude impairs effective government as well. If he is actually serious about improving congressional relations instead of just putting poorly developed ideas to paper, then he would do well to start by re-evaluating his own perceptions.

DANIEL WHITE Spokane, Wash.

Readers react to our story (“Clouds of Smoke,” 1/11/18) about how U.S. Attorney General Jeff Sessions’ attitude toward marijuana could affect GOP politicians like Rep. Cathy McMorris Rodgers in states that have legalized cannabis:

KATHY STOESER LUND: States rights are important only when it is convenient for certain elected officials.

KATIE WEBB: She needs to decide who she represents… the people of Washington, or Jeff Sessions, whose primary aim in this is to stay relevant, hoping to avoid Trump firing him.

NATHAN LANSING: Nonsense. All she has to do is stand up for the people’s will as represented by our vote on this matter. If she’s in a “tough spot,” it’s because she puts party before people. We can change that in November. n

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EDUCATION

The Pregnancy Test With Spokane’s high teen-pregnancy rates, school and health officials think education can help

BY WILSON CRISCIONE

I

n the city of Spokane, teens get pregnant at rates easily outpacing the state average. Sexually transmitted diseases are increasing almost everywhere in the nation, but the rate in Spokane County remains higher than in Washington. Among high schoolers in Spokane County, 44 percent did not use a condom the last time they had sex.

Those numbers, released by the Spokane Regional Health District, paint an alarming picture for teenage sexual health in Spokane, health officials and researchers say.

“There are concerning behaviors across the county,” says Ashley Beck, a research scientist for the Spokane Regional Health District.

A variety of factors, including poverty, family and access to birth control, contribute to the high teen-pregnancy rates, though research has yet to put a finger on the exact reasons locally. But in Spokane, the numbers have fueled a push to change one thing some say can be improved: sexual education.

“One of the most logical means,” Beck says, “is through the school.”

The health district supports comprehensive, evidence-based sexual education curriculum in Spokane Public Schools — “comprehensive” meaning that multiple birth control methods are taught, and “evidence-based” meaning that research has shown that it works. It’s why the health district supported a curriculum from Planned Parenthood called “Get Real” in Spokane Public Schools, though the school district decided against it following controversy over Planned Parenthood’s involvement.

But one thing is clear, Beck says: “When you look at how many youth were using a condom, the birth rates and the STI rates, I would think that what is currently being done is probably not effective.”

‘UNPREPARED’

By the time Janie Wright understood healthy relationships and safe sex, she had already graduated high school, got married and had a child.

Wright, 26, doesn’t know what would have changed if she understood those things earlier in life. She went to school in Spokane Public ...continued on next page

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 13

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“THE PREGNANCY TEST,” CONTINUED...

Schools, and soon after graduating from North Central High School, she got into an unhealthy marriage, she says. Now, she’s a single mom, preparing to enroll her 4-year-old son in kindergarten next school year. And she hopes that the conversations in school around sex will be different for him than it was for her.

“Not enough focus was on educating students on how to know if you’re ready, how to know to be safe,” Wright says.

Overall, teen-pregnancy rates have gone down in recent decades. But Spokane Public Schools, says Heather Bybee, the district’s director of secondary curriculum, is aware of the higher pregnancy rates in the city of Spokane — 39 teenage girls age 15-19 got pregnant in 2016 per 1,000, compared to just 24 per 1,000 in the state.

All of the sexual education at the middle school level is being updated, hopefully in time for the 2018-19 school year, Bybee says. It currently doesn’t meet state standards set by state Office of the Superintendent of Instruction in 2015. And it’s been decades since Spokane Public Schools overhauled its sexual education curriculum, Bybee says. The district has changed pieces of it, but not any large-scale changes.

“Never have we looked at the scope and said, ‘How are we hitting the standard, and growing, and building on our messaging?” she says.

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The most extensive sexual education is taught in middle school and ninth grade, says Bybee. In seventh grade, there’s about a week’s worth of instruction in science class, focusing mostly on biology and anatomy, Bybee says.

In eighth grade, there’s three to four weeks of instruction in a college and career readiness class required of every eighth-grader. That’s when students get instruction on relationships. Then in ninth-grade students are taught about prevention of STDs and personal safety.

The issue of consent is covered, framed as how students should have personal boundaries and respect themselves, Bybee says. But she says there’s little to no instruction on consent “moment-to-moment.” Bybee adds that updated sex ed materials should also address personal safety when using technology and social media.

And the new curriculum, Bybee says, will address every standard with every grade level that sex ed is taught. So the seventh-grade science teachers, for example, will teach more than just biology and anatomy.

Bybee says no set of curriculum materials that the district has looked at, even “Get Real,” meets all of the state standards. Instead of adopting one set for all middle-school sexual education and adding to it, the district decided to take pieces from different curricula.

But some, like Robin Pickering, an associate

professor in health science at Whitworth University, worry that will mean whatever is chosen won’t be “evidence-based.”

“I don’t see the value of picking and choosing, because invariably I think something gets lost in that translation,” Pickering says. “My concern is when we selectively remove things, that takes away from the evidence-based qualities of the curriculum.”

For Pickering, the answers to the high pregnancy, birth and abortion rates are all there, if you look. Her suggestion? Take an evidence-based curriculum, and add to it if it doesn’t meet a certain standard.

She’s concerned that, according to the health district, 10 percent of 12th-graders say they have had six or more sexual partners, because she thinks they may not be ready for that. She points to students she’s met who don’t understand that anal sex or oral sex are risky behaviors. LGBTQ students are left out of sex ed curriculum, she says.

“I think a lot of our kids are unprepared for the world we live in,” Pickering says.

HEALTHY CONVERSATIONS

John Repsold, pastor of Mosaic Fellowship and a member of the Spokane Public Schools Human Growth and Development Advisory Committee, says the rates of pregnancy, births and abortion rates in Spokane are “deeply disconcerting.”

“The question is, what’s causing those numbers?” he says.

He says there needs to be more research on the cause, before anyone assumes that certain education principles or techniques will lower it. He agrees, however, that current curricula need to be updated.

“If the methodology is archaic or dated, then kids are not going to listen to or accept it,” he says.

However, he was against Planned Parenthood’s involvement in sex ed curriculum. He hopes that any sex ed taught in Spokane schools would incorporate studies that show how teen suicide rates and depression may be linked to early sexual activity.

Pickering has taught sexual education at the university level and helped develop curriculum materials for a local school district. She says she sees gaps in the sexual education taught in Spokane that, if addressed, could lower pregnancy and STD rates.

She studies developed countries that have lower STD and teen pregnancy rates than the U.S. She notes that some countries start the conversation in kindergarten — ensuring that it’s ageappropriate, of course.

“It’s integrated into conversations,” Pickering says. “There’s not so much shame around sexuality. They have high access to birth control, high levels of comfort. In those places they do quite well in terms of teenage pregnancy.”

She says schools should follow the research and integrate more of those conversations in schools.

“There are places all over the world that have figured this out,” she says. “I don’t think we need to figure it out. I think we need to be more open to looking at what works and take a good look at the facts.” n wilsonc@inlander.com

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JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 15

NEWS | BRIEFS

‘A Form of Bullying’ Congresswoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers faces hecklers (again) at an MLK rally; plus, Sandpoint police identify a suspected racist AGAINST HECKLING

For the second year in a row, U.S. REP. CATHY McMORRIS RODGERS spoke at the Martin Luther King Jr. Day rally, and for the second year in a row, McMorris Rodgers was beset by protests and hecklers. Last year, protesters chanted “save our health care” during her speech.

This year, according to audio recordings and media accounts, some attendees stood up to turn their backs on McMorris Rodgers as she spoke, booed, called out “how about children’s health care,” yelled “liar” and chanted “do your job.”

But that earned the protestors’ rebukes from other speakers. Freda Gandy, the executive director of the Martin Luther King Jr. Family Outreach Center, encouraged the hecklers to vote instead of screaming and shouting.

Stephy Nobles-Beans, a local assistant pastor and a Whitworth University professor, excoriated the crowd for setting a bad example.

“Their behavior was very inappropriate, especially in front of our children,” Nobles-Beans says. “I’ve never felt the need to heckle somebody I disagreed with.”

In some ways, Nobles-Beans says, she’s sympathetic. She says she doesn’t necessarily agree with McMorris Rodgers. She has concerns about health care, Medicare and retirement. But she objected to how the congresswoman was treated by the audience.

“The heckling of another individual — it was a form of bullying,” Nobles-Beans says. “I know what it’s like to have your voice silenced, as a woman of color.”

While some on the left objected to the MLK Center inviting McMorris Rodgers at all, others felt more chastened by the response to the heckling.

“A gentleman came up to me in tears, saying, ‘I was one of the hecklers,’ and he told me, ‘I’m sorry,’” Nobles-Beans says. (DANIEL WALTERS)

TAKING A LOSS

Eastern Washington University’s athletics budget is in a $5.8 million hole, spokesman Dave Meany tells the Inlander. And it could result in increased student fees or other measures meant to bring more money to the athletics department, he says.

“The president [Mary Cullinan] has basically asked all university departments to collaborate to identify revenue-enhancing strategies,” Meany says.

The $5.8 million deficit is a cumulative deficit that has accrued over the last few years, Meany says. Nobody should expect wide-scale cuts at the university to pay for the deficit, however.

Instead, the university is focused on raising more money.

So far, the university only has some “recommended strategies” to handle the deficit. Those include increased fundraising and ticket sales,

16 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

sponsorships and sports camps. The athletics department will look to play more “guarantee games,” which are games where, for example, the EWU football team would go play a larger school like the University of Washington. By agreeing to play there, EWU gets a large sum of money, usually ranging from about $250,000 to $500,000, and the larger university typically gets a win.

For now, the university doesn’t yet know who the athletic director will be in the future. Bill Chaves, EWU’s athletic director for more than 10 years, recently took a job at North Dakota.

(WILSON CRISCIONE)

RED JEEP RACIST

Sandpoint police believe they know who has been spreading RACIST PROPAGANDA throughout the small North Idaho town for over a year — including in the form of 56 CDs left on cars in a high school parking lot last November.

Scott Rhodes was confronted by Sandpoint police at his office in an encounter captured by a police body camera. During the interaction, police tell Rhodes that they have video footage of his red Jeep arriving at the school, and a man they believe is Rhodes putting CDs on cars.

“No, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Rhodes told the officers, who were there to inform him that he would be trespassing if he were to go back on Lake Pend Oreille School District property.

Rhodes continued to deny any knowledge and told officers to contact his attorney.

“The issue the very professional Sandpoint Police Department spoke to me about was not a crime, and I stand by what I have already stated to them,” Rhodes writes in an email to the Inlander.

The CDs contained PDF copies of the racist fliers that had been distributed around Sandpoint, according to a Sandpoint police report.

The front of the CDs reads: “What They Are Hiding From You,” and cites a website that pedals racist viewpoints and has tabs for “Muslim Terrorism,” “War on Whites,” and “Bitcoin.”

Rhodes is also a person of interest for police in Alexandria, Virginia — the home of white supremacist Richard Spencer, according to a Sandpoint police report. Authorities in Virginia say a number they traced to Rhodes was used to make threatening, anti-Semitic calls to local politicians there.

Rhodes is currently considered a “person of interest” in these incidents and is not currently facing criminal charges. He has denied all involvement in an email to the Inlander. But even if police can prove Rhodes’ involvement, it’s unlikely he’ll face charges, Sandpoint Police Chief Corey Coon tells the Sandpoint Reader. The racist material is protected under the First Amendment.

(MITCH RYALS)

NEWS | DIGEST

ON INLANDER.COM FEATURING NATIONAL NEWS FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES

COPS CAN’T STOP YOU JUST TO CHECK ON CITIZENSHIP STATUS A Latino victim of a car accident was detained by a Spokane police officer in 2014 for apparently no other reason than to check his IMMIGRATION status.

The victim, Gabriel Gomez, sued the officer and the city in a case that was settled out of court last week. As part of the settlement, SPD will update its policy to clarify that officers “shall not contact, question, delay, detain or arrest an individual because s/he is suspected of violating immigration law.”

The city will also pay $49,000 in damages. Matt Adams, legal director of the Northwest Immigrant Rights Project and an attorney who worked on the case, believes that this is not an isolated incident in Washington state. SPD Chief Craig Meidl (pictured) says, “We clearly made a mistake. We own it and have taken steps to make sure it doesn’t happen again.” (MITCH RYALS)

A FIX FOR THE SCHOOL-FUNDING FIX Last year, the Washington State Legislature passed a bill adding billions of dollars in state funding to schools. The deal was widely seen as significant progress in fulfilling the 2012 McCleary ruling from the Washington State Supreme Court. Yet the bill at the same time restricted how much districts could collect through LOCAL LEVIES. And for some rural school districts, that restriction didn’t represent progress at all. “We’re getting less money,” says Jim Kowalkowski, Davenport School District superintendent. It’s a problem that Chris Reykdal (pictured), the state’s Superintendent of Public Instruction, hopes to fix in the 2018 legislative session. He plans to introduce legislation that will make changes to the bill, House Bill 2242, passed last year. The changes would provide school districts with more funding flexibility, giving relief to a small, rural school districts like Davenport. (WILSON CRISCIONE)

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WAR OF WORDS Generally, unless you’re a lawyer, it’s a bad idea to start arguing with a judge.

But Rogers High School debaters William Lynch and Katelynn Searls have the chutzpah to do just that, facing off against District Court judges Debra Hayes and Aimee Mauer at “RHETORIC IN THE RING IV: Kids vs Courts.” It’s the fourth such fundraiser for the Rogers High School debate team, to be held on Tuesday, Jan. 23, at 5:30 pm at the Howard Street Gym. In past years, the celebrity debaters have included City Council President Ben Stuckart and City Councilmember Mike Fagan, Washington State Sens. Andy Billig and Michael Baumgartner and local school board members. In years past, the topics have been more on the lighter end — less, say, discussions about racial inequity in the criminal justice system and more, like, the respective merits of Harry Potter versus Twilight. (DANIEL WALTERS)

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JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 17

NEWS | BOISE

Health Reform, Idaho-Style Idaho may have finally figured out a way to give more Idahoans health insurance

BY DANIEL WALTERS

I

f only Jessica Rachels lived in Washington state, she and her husband would have health insurance. In Washington state, her family’s below-the-poverty-line income — around $25,000 for her family of six — would instantly make her eligible for Medicaid.

But she doesn’t live in Washington. She lives a few dozen miles to the east, in Idaho, and because the state chose not to expand Medicaid under Obamacare, adults in a family of six whose adjusted income is more than $7,080 a year are generally considered flat-out too rich to be enrolled in Medicaid.

Rachels is the caregiver for her disabled daughter — who thankfully does qualify for Medicaid — and she’s worried that it’s taking a toll on her health. A surgery to fix excruciating foot pain would cost around $20,000, a luxury far out of her reach. The cost of even going to a sliding-scale health clinic is often too much for a checkup.

“We don’t go unless there’s an emergency,” Rachels says. “We’d rather put food on the table, pay our bills and groceries.”

Now, the really bizarre thing: Her family actually doesn’t make enough money to qualify for tax-credit subsidies that could help them to buy insurance on Idaho’s health exchanges. If she had made more money or had fewer kids, the government might help her out.

For now, she’s stuck with at least 50,000 other Idahoans in the “Medicaid coverage gap,” trapped in a no man’s land where their meager wages qualify them for neither Medicaid nor health-care subsidies.

Years of attempts by some Idaho legislators, activists and government staffers to fill in that gap have been unsuccessful. But now, the state of Idaho is floating a solution that may be their best shot yet.

It’s a two-part “dual waiver” proposal: First, get a federal waiver to allow low-income Idahoans who don’t qualify for Medicaid to receive federal subsidies on the Obamacare exchanges. And second, get a federal waiver that would allow people with some of the most serious illnesses to enroll into Medicaid.

“This is not expanding Medicaid,” Idaho Gov. C.L. “Butch” Otter proclaimed in his final State of the State address this month. “This is providing Idaho’s working families who have modest incomes a more affordable way to get the coverage they need.”

But to pull it off, they’ve got to first convince the Trump administration and a deeply conservative legislature to let them do it.

18 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

In his last year as Idaho governor, Butch Otter hopes to finally close the gaping hole in the Idaho health care system. LANCE CHEUNG PHOTO

HEALTH HOLES

Obamacare wasn’t supposed to have big holes in states like Idaho.

When the controversial law was designed, it intended to span the insurance coverage gap by building a bridge, of sorts, from two sides.

With help from federal funds, states would extend the bridge from one side by expanding the state’s Medicaid program. The federal government would extend the bridge from the other side for low-income people who made a little more money through federal tax-credits.

What they didn’t count on was a Supreme Court decision allowing states like Idaho simply to refuse to extend their piece of the bridge. For deep red states, the association of the Medicaid expansion with Obamacare, combined with the taint of government-sponsored health care, was too ideologically toxic to consider.

It’s resulted in these absurd scenarios where Idaho families suddenly lose access to federal subsidies because they have another kid and fall below the federal poverty level.

Former Idaho Department of Health and Welfare Director Richard Armstrong says Idaho’s decision not to expand Medicaid didn’t reduce health insurance costs for the rest of the market. Instead, the opposite happened.

“Oregon and Washington expanded Medicaid. Idaho did not,” Armstrong says. “What’s happened in the last three or four years?”

Idaho watched its health-care costs on the exchanges soar past Washington and Oregon’s, he explains.

There’s a reason for that, says Brian Whitlock, president and CEO of the Idaho Hospital Association. The uninsured are incredibly expensive on the system.

“They end up getting it in the most expensive and most inefficient way possible by going to an emergency room,” Whitlock says.

But a plan came together last year, Armstrong says, when his staff noticed two quirks in the current law: Obamacare actually already allowed the legal non-citizens below the poverty line who weren’t eligible for Medicaid to get health-care subsidies.

“It doesn’t seem fair that a legal alien in Idaho can buy subsidized insurance and a citizen cannot,” Armstrong says. It simply made logical sense to get permission to expand those subsidies to the other working Idahoans stuck in the insurance gap.

Armstrong says another idea came last April, in the Idaho Health and Welfare offices. Idaho’s Medicaid administrator mentioned that existing law already allowed many breast and cervical cancer patients to be enrolled in the state’s Medicaid program, despite being above the federal poverty level.

“We all stared at each other,” Armstrong says. “Why was that the only one?!”

Then came the epiphany: Why not put the sickest Idahoans, the ones with the diseases that are the most expensive to treat, on Medicaid?

Turns out, if you put people with illnesses like stagefour cancer, blood and immunity diseases, cystic fibrosis, multiple sclerosis, end-stage liver disease on Medicaid, premiums for everyone else would fall, Armstrong says.

Idaho estimates that their plan would make private insurance on the individual market cost 20 percent less. And because lower rates mean the government has to spend less on tax-credit subsidies, theoretically, it wouldn’t cost Idaho an extra dime.

In all, Armstrong estimates, the proposal would result in around 35,000 more Idahoans with insurance.

It’s uncertain, of course, whether the Trump administration, which has sought to undermine the legacy of his predecessor, will approve such a waiver. Armstrong says the lack of response from the feds has been frustrating.

But if it works out, he says, Idaho could be a nationwide example.

“There was no one else that is going down this path,” Armstrong says. “I would say any states that haven’t expanded Medicaid should look at what we’re proposing.”

POLITICAL HURDLES

In the meantime, activists have been impatient. At a recent town hall meeting, Idaho state Sen. Luke Malek — who’s running for Congress — was presented with a

petition to put a straight-out Medicaid expansion on the ballot.

He declined.

“I don’t think that expanding Medicaid under the Affordable Care Act is the solution that Idaho needs,” Malek says.

But the dual-waiver plan? It’s not his plan, but he likes it. He says he sees “a tremendous amount of potential.”

Still, he’s unsure about how the plan will fare in the legislature. While he feels the legislature’s recognition of the sheer complexity of health care has grown over the years, there are a lot of newcomers.

But Armstrong says that, in his conversations with lawmakers, they’ve indicated that the proposal is something they can support.

Whitlock, the Idaho Hospital Association CEO, is hopeful as well.

“Even though we’re a very conservative state, generally our legislators have compassion for the sickest of the sick,” Whitlock says Yet the proposal will face opposition from conservative and libertarian groups like the influential Idaho Freedom Foundation.

“You mean the bailout for big insurance companies? That’s what it is. It’s all it is,” says Wayne Hoffman, president of the Idaho Freedom Foundation. He sees the dual-waiver plan as synonymous with putting more Idahoans on government-run health care and making thousands dependent on Obamacare subsidies.

He blames regulations for the rise in health-care costs. He predicts a slippery slope, where year after year, different types of patients will petition the legislature to be added to the Medicaid rolls.

Indeed, groups like Close the Gap Idaho see the dual-waiver proposal as a good first step, but not the end of the story. There would still be people without access to health insurance. Many expensive illnesses still wouldn’t be covered by Medicaid.

Former Idaho Health and Welfare Director Richard Armstrong believes there’s support for the dual-waiver proposal in the Idaho legislature.

“If Idaho is successful in implementing two waivers, we’ve cleared a couple of hurdles in a 100-meter dash,” says Whitlock.

“We haven’t won the race yet.”

Yet government-run health care continues to poll very poorly in Idaho, Hoffman says. If the governor and legislature approve the plan, he predicts, “there will be a pretty serious backlash.”

But so far, Armstrong takes comfort in what seems like comparatively mild opposition from Hoffman’s group.

“Even the Freedom Foundation, they have not been nearly as negative about this as many things,” says Armstrong.

And for a woman like Rachels, reform can’t come soon enough. She not only has to care for her disabled daughter, she has to care for her dad, a disabled veteran. If something happened to her because she couldn’t afford to go to the doctor, she worries, who would take care of them?

“Insurance of any kind would be amazing,” Rachels says.

“It is scary when you’re a caregiver for two people with two disabilities.” n danielw@inlander.com

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 19

NEWS | ENVIRONMENT In a letter to legislators, Franz outlined resilience principles her agency believes are key to climate-related policy changes, emphasizing resource protection while minimizing impacts on residents, businesses and farms.

“I want to make sure they’re looking at it from the perspective I have, as well as many of the rural communities in Eastern and Central Washington,” Franz says.

Preparation includes treating forests to make them less susceptible to wildfires like those in 2014 and 2015, which were the worst seasons in recent memory and cost the state $500 million, Franz says. To keep Eastern Washington forests healthy, DNR hopes to treat 70,000 acres of forest per year at a cost of about $70 million annually.

Franz also says the state should accelerate carbon sequestration, in part by keeping forests and agricultural land protected from development, drought and heavy rainfall events that can cause landslides. Many solutions may have multiple benefits, such as adjusting state timber harvests to a longer time scale to improve soils, sequester more carbon and continue producing lumber and income for the state.

“I do believe that people recognize the value of making this kind of investment today,” Franz says. “Finding the resources will actually reduce the overall cost of what our state is spending just to reduce the impacts we’re already seeing with climate change.”

A NEW APPROACH

The Department of Natural Resources hopes to expand forest-management efforts to prevent more devastating wildfires. JACOB JONES PHOTO

Preparing for Impact Sizing up Olympia’s efforts to tackle carbon and climate issues

BY SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL

I

n recent years, attempts to put a price on carbon pollution in Washington state, largely spearheaded by Gov. Jay Inslee’s office, have not met with a great deal of success.

Inslee’s 2015 cap-and-trade proposal stalled in the House and never got a hearing in the mostly Republicancontrolled Senate. In 2016, a similar voter initiative would have “swapped in” carbon pricing while lowering sales tax, with an eye on minimizing impacts on lowincome residents who would be hit hardest by higher gas and utility prices. Without backing from environmental groups, the measure failed.

By 2017, the state Department of Ecology had set a Clean Air Rule requiring the largest greenhouse gas emitters to reduce their pollution over a long-term schedule or buy credit for reductions made by others. But in December a Thurston County judge held that, short of legislative changes, Ecology couldn’t enforce a significant portion of the rule.

Enter 2018.

Inslee has again announced a carbon-pricing proposal, and in the meantime, Commissioner of Public Lands Hilary Franz is urging other immediate actions

20 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

to prepare the state for climate changes already starting.

NATURAL RESOURCES

Franz, who oversees the Department of Natural Resources and the management of about 6 million acres of publicly owned land, is focused mostly on keeping forest, agricultural and Lands Commissioner Hilary Franz aquatic lands working and healthy.

“I have a legal and moral duty to protect the health of public lands and also strengthen our communities who depend on them, not just for today but also for the generations to come,” Franz says. “I believe we have a huge responsibility to not just reduce our impacts and contributions to carbon pollution, but also ensure that we are setting up our lands and waters to be more resilient in the face of impacts.”

This year’s carbon-pricing plan is substantially different from previous efforts, as it attempts to partner with the private sector, explains Sen. Reuven Carlyle, D-Seattle, sponsor of the legislation and new chair of the Senate Energy, Environment and Technology committee since Democrats took control of the chamber in November.

“This is not a top-down program from government in Olympia,” Carlyle says. “This is a way to give our local utilities statewide, both investor-owned like Puget Sound Energy and Avista, as well as our public utility districts, a real sense of authority and ownership in reducing CO2 emissions in a way that meets our local needs.”

As proposed, Inslee’s plan would raise an estimated $1.5 billion in the first biennium. Half of that would support projects that reduce greenhouse gas emissions, with the rest split between water and natural resource protection, and help for low-income residents and workers whose jobs may change or go away as the state shifts away from fossil fuels.

One of the most promising things that makes this proposal different is it would allow utilities to invest 100 percent of the tax charged to them right back into their own systems to increase their renewable portfolios and help low-income LETTERS customers with energy Send comments to efficiency, says Dennis editor@inlander.com.

Vermillion, Avista Utilities president.

“It would be an economic benefit to our communities that we serve, and a job creator,” he says, “and we have significant control over what that would look like under how the bill currently looks.”

Avista isn’t officially supporting or opposing the proposal this early in the process, but the utility has been encouraged up to this point in working with the governor’s office, he says.

One concern is over the tax rate, which Avista hopes to see lowered from the current starting point of $20 per metric ton of emissions, as any tax would be reflected as a higher cost on customer bills, Vermillion says.

“We would very much like to be supportive of the ultimate plan,” Vermillion says. “Whether or not we’re able to do so remains to be seen at this point. … Hopefully we can have an outcome that works for everyone.” n samanthaw@inlander.com

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THE BURGER ISSUE HUNGRY YET?

The humble hamburger is a menu mainstay at restaurants everywhere, from the cheapest of fast-food joints to the finest of fine dining.

When in doubt or indecision, a burger is a reliably safe bet. From its American beginnings at the turn of the 20th century and evolution into a sandwich staple that caters to all — carnivore to vegan — the burger is synonymous with the American diet.

For the Inlander’s first-ever Burger Issue, we set out to explore some of the region’s favorite beef patties, along with growing options for health-, ethically, and environmentally conscious eaters.

And what we discovered is that the burger is nearly ubiquitous — on menus everywhere — which made narrowing down what’s featured here quite challenging. For that reason, don’t hate us if your favorite isn’t in here. We also welcome and encourage readers to tell us their favorites and why they’re so great at food@inlander.com.

In the end, we rounded up our top five staff favorites, notable vegan and vegetarian options, several meaty alternatives to ground beef, where to get a great deal on a burger and beer, the newest burger-centric restaurant opening in the region and, finally, a look at two buzzworthy, plant-based burger products now available in the local market. So get out there, and get chomping.

— CHEY SCOTT Inlander food editor

o t e d O

f e Be FIVE WRITERS SING PRAISES FOR THEIR FAVORITE (MOSTLY) LOCAL BURGER CREATIONS, FROM DURKIN’S TO THE ELK

MI MI BURGER ($14)

The Blackbird Tavern + Kitchen, 905 N. Washington For a burger so hearty and rich you may not want to eat it all in one meal (which obviously isn’t a bad thing), try the Blackbird’s decadent Mi Mi burger. Unlike beef patties topped with all the traditional toppings (onions, lettuce, tomato, pickles, mayo, ketchup, etc.), the Mi Mi isn’t messing around with its flavor-melding.

Starting with beef from Washington state-based Gebbers Farm, the chuck-and-brisket patty is topped with white cheddar and pea shoots. Yet the stroke of genius of the Mi Mi burger is its heavy load of gooey, salty, sweet candied bacon crumbles. The savory-meets-sugary topping offers the perfect balance to the earthy, grilled beef with tangy cheese and the sweet, crunchy pea shoots. Not for the faint of stomach or heart, the Mi Mi is worth all the sticky fingers and risk of tummy ache (it’s that rich) for its indulgent take on burgerdom. And as deliciously tempting as anything else on Blackbird’s menu may be, I nearly always order this burger, and its epicurean memory never fails me. (CHEY SCOTT)

SMASH BURGER ($12)

The Elk Public House, 1931 W. Pacific Ave. The Elk’s Smash Burger doesn’t try to do too much.

But, somehow, it does so much. The brilliance is in the two burger patties — two juicy, hand-smashed, melt-in-yourmouth, three-ounce patties. It’s a huge step up from the Elk’s previous signature burger, the Moon Burger, which

22 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

had just one six-ounce patty. Two years ago, the Elk moved away from the Moon Burger in favor of the the Smash Burger (also featured at Geno’s, a restaurant under the same ownership).

With two patties, the Smash Burger packs in more flavor, and more grease, to mix with the 1000 Island dressing, the diced pickles and onions, the melted American cheese and the toasted bun. It may not blow you away at first bite. No, the Smash Burger has higher aspirations. It aims to blow you away on the last bite. You try it again and again, expecting it to be great every time. And again and again, the Smash Burger delivers. (WILSON CRISCIONE)

RUN OF THE MILL BURGER ($12)

Timber Gastro Pub, 1610 E. Schneidmiller Ave., Post Falls This so-called Run of the Mill burger is anything but, yet we like double-puns (note the logging industry reference). Anybody can amp up a burger with a few pieces of bacon; Timber Gastropub grinds pork belly into their allbeef chuck. Pork belly, as we know, comes from the same region as bacon, only it’s fattier (and fat equals flavor).

You taste the meat in this burger, twice actually; as all burgers feature two patties (which could equate to two meals for some). After the meat, you’ll taste the cheddar’s sharpness and, for more contrasts, there’s red onion, lettuce, tomato and house-made pickles. Served alongside ...continued on page 24

Timber Gastro Pub’s Run of the Mill Burger is anything but.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 23

THE BURGER ISSUE GROUND-UP HISTORY

“ODE TO BEEF,” CONTINUED... crispy, salty fries and scratch-made ketchup, this classic American meal goes beyond the common.

For a few bucks more, have your mind blown by any of Timber’s piled-on burger variations, knowing that those burgers are better for having been Run of the Mill first. (CARRIE SCOZZARO)

savor — an aftertaste that demands another bite.

Whatever the reason, perhaps a burger like that provides the cure to finally heal the wounds that divide this country. That, and unlimited steak fries.

(DANIEL WALTERS)

BANZAI BURGER ($11)

Durkin’s Liquor Bar, 415 W. Main Whenever I find myself in one of the cushy booths at Durkin’s, I tell myself, “I’m finally going to get something other than the burger.” More often than not, however, common sense prevails and I just end up ordering the burger again. It’s just too good to pass up.

On paper, the Durkin’s burger doesn’t seem like it’s going to be much. After all, it’s only got red onions, pickle and dill mayo on it. This burger turns out to be surprising in a couple of ways, because not only is its name a misnomer (it actually comes with two generous patties) but it’s delicious and decadent despite foregoing a lot of traditional burger accoutrements. The combination of the juicy, flavorful beef and the sharp tang of the cheese is a thing of beauty, and I’m still not quite sure how they pull it off.

If you’re feeling unreasonably hungry, cough up an extra $3 and you can upgrade that “single” to a “double,” which is actually three patties. However you eat it, you’re probably going to have a new favorite burger. (NATHAN WEINBENDER) n

Red Robin, 725 W. Main Ave. One summer out of college, way back in the heady days of 2005, I worked at a magical place, a casual dining spot called Red Robin, with a freshfaced young server named Josh Kerns. Our lives have diverged since. Today he’s a Republican Spokane County Commissioner, while I’m a reporter, the sort of profession his party delights in savaging.

But we both, independently and without knowledge of the other, returned to Red Robin this past month and we — of the hundreds of delicious options on the Red Robin menu — both ordered the same item off of the menu: The Banzai Burger.

So, why, after all this time, does the Banzai Burger still have such a hold on our hearts? Maybe it’s the triumphant trifecta of tastes: savory beef meets sweet pineapple meets tangy teriyaki. Or maybe it’s the journey through textures your bite takes as it chomps through the bun: the cool, crisp tomato, the cheese, the shredded lettuce, the warm grilled pineapple rings and, finally, the succulent burger. Or maybe it’s the satisfying aftertaste that hangs on the tip of your tongue as you pause to

SINGLE BURGER ($16)

Hamburgers are so loved in the U.S. they’re largely considered as American as apple pie.

But like apple pie, which was definitely made long before the country’s founding, the delicious combination of ground meat between bread has a much more storied history.

If you want to go way back, it’s believed that while Genghis Khan built his Mongolian Empire in the 13th century, frequently traveling on horseback, the conqueror and his armies packed ground or minced meat between their saddles and mounts, which tenderized and heated up the meat as they rode.

It also turns out that people really liked eating raw ground meat, for like, a disturbingly long time (and still do; see: steak tartare), before somebody finally decided to cook the stuff and smoosh it between bread, most likely at some point in the late 1800s.

Germans who lived in Ham-

burg were particularly fond of ground beef for a few hundred years before their descendants began immigrating to the U.S. in the mid-1800s. Around that time, restaurants picking up on German food styles started serving “hamburg steak,” first raw, then later cooked, according to History.com.

A lot of people and places claim to have been the first to put meat patties on sandwiches, but it seems clear the American public was pretty much introduced to the hamburger at the 1904 World’s Fair in St. Louis.

By 1921, the first White Castle opened in Wichita, Kansas, and the burger was even adopted into pop culture with characters like the mooching J. Wellington Wimpy, who famously tells Popeye the Sailor in a 1934 cartoon that, “I’d gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.” Same, Wimpy. Same.

— SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL

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The Other

Red Meats STEP ASIDE BEEF, IT’S TIME FOR THESE OTHER FOUR-LEGGED PROTEINS TO SHINE

BY DANIEL WALTERS AND SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL

F

or perhaps too long, beef has played the leading role in America’s favorite dish, yet more restaurants these days are branching out with other sources of animal proteins, creative seasonings and toppings to offer some more unique combinations than the traditional hamburger with cheese. From fatty, juicy lamb meat to lean and mean bison, from German-style sausage to elk you don’t need a hunting license for, these four non-beef (yet not vegetarian; see page 28 for that list) burgers found locally offer an exploration of flavor not to be missed.

MEDITERRANEAN LAMB BURGER ($12.95) Moon Time, 1602 Sherman Ave., Coeur d’Alene, 208-667-2331 The star of Moon Time’s Mediterranean Lamb Burger is, as it should be, a juicy, hearty, well-seasoned lamb patty, made with a prominent rosemary infu-

sion that you can taste in every bite. And that’s saying something, as the herb is constantly competing for mouth space with a flavorful oregano pesto mayo and generous portion of melted goat cheese. The cheese and sauce offer a complementary creaminess to the patty, char-grilled to perfectly seal in the moisture of the meat, and the grilled vegetable relish that tops it all off — cooked just long enough to soften the veggies while still offering a slight onion crunch. (SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL)

SOUTHWESTERN BISON BURGER ($18)

1898 Public House, 2010 W. Waikiki Rd., 466-2121 Halfway through 1898 Public House’s Southwestern Bison Burger, you might not yet have felt the full force of its spicy kick, created with a combination of fried jalapenos, chipotle aioli and pepper jack cheese. But with one more bite, the sum total of spicy toppings explodes in

1898 Public House’s Southwestern Bison Burger packs a punch.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

a powerful combination of heat, only barely tempered by a subtle-by-comparison mushroom salsa, which is melted right into the cheese. The bison patty itself, best not cooked more than medium, plays almost a supporting role in this spicy combination on a toasted bun, with the house-cured bacon serving as the cherry on top. (SW)

ELK BURGER ($11)

Hills’ Restaurant and Lounge, 401 W. Main, 747-3946 It’s not the Elk Public House, ironically, that has the Spokane’s star elk burger. It’s local mainstay Hills’ Restaurant and Lounge in the heart of downtown Spokane. Done right, elk is one of the more delicious meats, but because it’s so lean, it can easily become dull and dry without a little something extra. Hills’ solved that problem by mixing in a bit of pork into the ground elk, topping it with melted Swiss cheese and sauteed mushrooms for a juicy, satisfying medley in every bite. It’s all in the game, y’know? Guy Fieri featured the burger on Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives, but don’t let that turn you away. (DANIEL WALTERS)

BRAT BURGER ($6.95)

Alpine Delicatessen, 417 E. Third Ave., 455-5148 “Hotdog or hamburger?” goes the classic barbecue conundrum. But the Alpine Deli rejects this false choice, delivering a hamburger made from sausage. For the Brat Burger, Alpine Deli doesn’t do anything fancy with the lettuce, onions, pickles and tomato, and simply tops it with mustard and mayo. But it’s the patty itself that’s the clear star, with Alpine Deli’s bratwurst mixture of pork and beef seasoned in a way that give it a complex flavor much stronger and more interesting than any conventional hamburger. It comes served on a German Brotchen roll, just in case the whole German delicatessen concept wasn’t clear enough. (DW) n

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 25

THE BURGER ISSUE

Bargains

of Earthly

Delights AN OVERVIEW OF LOCAL RESTAURANTS’ BURGER-AND-BEER-NIGHT SPECIALS HAPPENING THROUGHOUT THE WEEK

BY CHEY SCOTT

MONDAY McRUINS

Ruins, 825 N. Monroe 5-10 pm; all sandwiches under $10 On Monday nights, the diminutive small-plates restaurant and craft-cocktail bar on the corner of Monroe and Mallon turns into a fast-food-inspired diner, with burgers and sandwiches all modeled after familiar favorites from some of the country’s biggest drive-thru chains. Though items on the weekly menu often rotate, chef-owner Tony Brown says one mainstay features “two all-beef patties, special sauce, pickles and onions on a sesame seed bun.” McRuins’ format is walk-up counter ordering, so seat yourself when you get in. There’s also super cheap canned beer ($1 cans of Olympia), and plenty of tasty, house-made dipping sauces.

BURGER AND PINT NIGHT

Prohibition Gastropub, 1914 N. Monroe 5-10 pm; $14 for a burger and pint of beer Also on Mondays, fans of Prohibition Gastropub chef-owner John Leonetti’s burgers — the patties are infused with coffee grounds, which keeps them juicy no matter how they’re cooked, and are often topped with his signature candied bacon — can enjoy special one-offs during Burger and Pint Night. Recent specials include a German-inspired burger with stone-ground mustard aioli, and a spaghetti-themed burger. Each week’s burger includes a pint of beer from Prohibition’s featured brewery of the month (January is New Belgium; February is Georgetown; diners also get to keep their pint glass).

Find a preview of the week’s specials on Facebook and/ or Instagram.

TUESDAY

BURGERS & BREWS NIGHT

1898 Public House, 2010 W. Waikiki Rd. 4-9 pm; $15 for a burger and 20 oz. draft beer No matter how far afield you are, a trip up north to 1898 Public House — especially on Tuesday nights — at the Kalispel Golf and Country Club, near Mead, is worth the journey. Tuesday’s Burgers and Brews night features two weekly specials to choose from — always at least one Angus beef patty, and something else from the kitchen of Executive Chef Tyler Schwenk, like fried chicken or a veggie-friendly sandwich. Choose from anything on tap to fill your included, 20-ounce glass of beer, along with 1898’s many options for french fries, from traditional cut

26 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

Downriver Grill serves a different “Burger of the Moment” on Wednesdays. to waffle and sweet potato. A monthly menu of Burgers and Brews upcoming, weekly line-ups can be found at kalispelgolf.com/dining; also check Facebook and Instagram for previews.

BURGER AND BEER TUESDAY

Morty’s Tap & Grille, 5517 S. Regal 11 am-10 pm; $12 for any burger on the menu with a pint of draft beer The upper South Hill neighborhood pub and grill offers a variety of rotating specials on various days of the week, but Burger and Beer night happens every Tuesday, from lunch through to closing. This weekly special includes any burger on Morty’s regular menu — including its “Bourbon Street BBQ,” teriyaki and mushroom bacon Swiss burgers — along with the diner’s choice of a pint of beer (micro or domestic) currently on tap.

WEDNESDAY

“BURGER OF THE MOMENT” NIGHT

Downriver Grill, 3315 W. Northwest Blvd.

11 am-9 pm; $10 for burger, plus $2 for pint of beer ($1 for Stella or Guinness) With all-day happy hour every Wednesday, in addition to the day’s featured burger special, this Audubon neighborhood favorite is usually busy (reservations are available; walk-ins also welcome). Unfamiliar diners should understand why as they scroll through Downriver’s Facebook feed, showcasing past weeks’ “Burger of the Moment,” like a Korean barbecue-style one with pickled onions and Thai chili aioli, and one topped with smoked white cheddar, pomegranate barbecue sauce and crispy fried onions. All burgers come with a side of house truffle chips.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

WIMPY WEDNESDAYS

Churchill’s Steakhouse, 165 S. Post 4-10 pm (lounge only; ages 21+); $7 burgers Wednesday nights in the lounge at Churchill’s have become a well-known favorite for local burger lovers who also love a good bargain. To make the patties for these deeply discounted yet high-quality burgers, the steakhouse kitchen grinds down miscut, slightly underweight, or otherwise “imperfect” USDA prime steaks that can’t be served in the restaurant. Wimpy Wednesday is only offered in the cozy, basement lounge, which does not accept reservations (and is only open to ages 21+), so get there early if you want to grab a spot without a wait.

THURSDAY

BURGERS AND BREWS THURSDAYS

Seasons of Coeur d’Alene Fresh Grill & Bar, 209 E. Lakeside Ave. 5-10 pm; $10 for signature burger with draft beer or house wine For nearly five years, guests of this eatery in the heart of downtown Coeur d’Alene have been enjoying discounted burgers and beverages every Thursday night. The first-come, first-served (no reservations; lounge only) special not only includes Seasons’ signature Kobe beef burger, but also ground chicken, andouille sausage, salmon, buffalo and falafel patties. Restaurant manager Traci Acireno say Seasons’ bargain-burger night is one of the region’s originals, and that many of the aforementioned weekly specials arose after theirs became popular, based on her and other staff’s understanding. Included with their burger, diners can choose a pint of any draft beer or a glass of the house red or white wine. n

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Celebrating

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Wolffy’s double cheeseburger is one of many filling yet affordable classics.

Burgers on a Budget

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

of Great Burgers

WHILE WE COULDN’T REVIEW EVERY CHEAP BURGER IN THE REGION (SORRY), THESE FOUR CLASSICS ARE DEFINITELY WORTH YOUR APPETITE

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

W

hen it comes to burgers, “cheap” shouldn’t automatically translate to “poor quality.” In fact, it sometimes seems a bit silly that one of the simplest foods out there can be so ridiculously expensive at certain restaurants. So here’s a celebration of the “cheap” burger, and we’re thinking beyond the obvious (and excellent) choices like Zip’s or Dick’s. What most of these places have in common: They value simplicity without sacrificing taste. We set ourselves a limit of $8 or less per burger, and with that in mind, here are a few of the burger joints we’d recommend when all you’ve got is a $10 bill in your wallet.

CHEESEBURGER ($3)

Hudson’s Hamburgers, 207 E. Sherman, Coeur d’Alene, 208-664-5444 The burgers at this beloved Coeur d’Alene establishment, which has been in the Hudson family for a century, are the definition of “no frills.” Meat, cheese, pickle, onion — that’s it. Add one of their spicy ketchup or mustard sauces if you want, but you really don’t have to. Sounds simple (and it is), but I promise you won’t miss any of the fixings you think you might. In fact, Hudson’s is really defined by the stuff it doesn’t have: French fries, milkshakes, relish, tomatoes, a debit card reader. In keeping with the minimalism of its food, the burger menu itself only has four options — you can get a hamburger or a cheeseburger, with either single or double patties — and this is my advice: Order a regular ol’ cheeseburger and then keep ordering them until you can’t eat anymore.

DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER ($6.65)

Wolffy’s Hamburgers, 1229 N. Hamilton, 487-1587 This tiny ’50s-style lunch counter near Gonzaga (there’s another Wolffy’s location in Airway Heights) is a must-visit for anyone fond of old-school burgers cooked right in front of you. You can’t really go wrong with anything on the menu, but I’m fond of the juicy double

cheeseburger: two beef patties, each topped with a slice of cheese, a pickle, tomato and a special sauce (which I typically ask for on the side for fry dipping). Onions are optional, and you can ask for them to be grilled (and you should). This burger is less than $7, and it’s way more filling than the price might suggest. You might have to wait for a seat, but it’s worth it.

THE 1/2 POUNDER ($5.79)

Ron’s Drive-In, 12502 E. Sprague, 924-6853 Every couple of months, I make a trip out to the Valley simply to eat at Ron’s, an oldschool burger joint with a reasonably priced menu and a drive-thru. But I always go inside to order, because Ron’s has a retro vibe, with lots of brick and bright red-and-yellow booths, that reminds me of being a kid. In terms of burgers, I tend toward the accurately titled Half Pounder, which easily gives you the most bang for your buck. It’s loaded with toppings (cheese, lettuce, tomato, pickle, onion, ketchup and mustard), and if you’re so inclined — and you know you are — you can add bacon for just 20 cents.

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HUMBLE BURGER WITH CHEESE ($5.75)

Humble Burger, 102 N. Main St., Moscow, facebook.com/humbleburger At Humble Burger, the options are intentionally simple. You can order the Humble Burger or the Veggie Burger. That’s it. Sure, you can add another 6-ounce smash-burger patty, made-toorder on the grill just behind the counter, throw on some American cheese, or substitute lettuce for the Panhandle Bakery brioche bun. But in the end, you’re getting a delicious, filling patty, topped with pickles, grilled onions, and “special sauce,” at a price that doesn’t break the bank. In a world where having so many options can make it harder, not easier, to choose what you want, Humble Burger makes it smoother than ever to fill your pie-hole and leave satisfied.

(SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL) n

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www.fairwoodretirement.com JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 27

THE BURGER ISSUE

Beefy Burgers

(sans Beef)

GOING VEGETARIAN OR VEGAN DOESN’T MEAN GOING WITHOUT A TASTY BURGER

BY DAN NAILEN

Allie’s Smokehouse Bac’n Cheese Burger packs in all the classic flavors, but with none of the animal. YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

28 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

NEW YEAR NEW RESEARCH

A

few months ago my partner and I made the hasty decision to go vegan, or at least vegan-ish. The effort, semi-successful so far, led to my exploring areas on local menus I once would have skipped right over in favor of something delicious that once moo-ed, oink-ed or baa-ed, now stuffed in a bun and covered with cheese and assorted condiments. Thankfully, going the Way of the Vegetable doesn’t mean foregoing burgers, and most places in the Inland Northwest at least have some veggie burger option, whether that “burger” is made of beans, beets, rice, mushrooms or some other meat substitute.

These are some of my favorites:

SMOKEHOUSE BAC’N CHEESE BURGER ($10)

Allie’s Vegan Pizzeria & Café, 1314 Grand Blvd. #6, 321-7090 This pleasant spot on Spokane’s lower South Hill serves up the kind of veggie burger that makes it easy to eschew beef. The Allie’s menu is all vegan all the time, and a skeptic might consider the idea of a vegan “bacon cheeseburger” absurd, but this bad boy utterly satisfies. The patty — a combination of brown rice, black beans and sunflower seeds — holds together remarkably well without being squishy, and the cashew cheese and tempeh “bac’n” do just fine as substitutes for the real thing. Add some vegan BBQ mayo, lettuce and tomato and you have a classic bacon-cheese served on a fluffy bun with a side of chips or potato salad. If you like to keep things simpler or free of bacon flavor, Allie’s also has a straightforward Black Bean Burger served with chipotle mayo, cilantro and tomato for just $8.

THE BEAN BEET BURGER ($12)

Cascadia Public House, 6314 N. Ash, 321-7051 This relatively new North Side spot is quickly making a name for itself for vegetarian and vegan options, among a creative menu of omnivore- and pub-friendly comfort food staples. And while their Impossible Burger (see story on page 30), a plant-based patty that tastes remarkably like beef, is getting a lot of buzz, I prefer the bright red Bean Beet Burger. It’s a monster — seriously, splitting it between two people is a wise decision — and makes a nice base for a slew of fresh toppings like slices of red onion, butter lettuce, tomato and cilantro. Add a dollop of vegan chipotle aioli to the Alpine Bakery Bun and you’re in business with a burger unlike any other in town.

CHICKPEA BURGER ($12)

Central Food, 1335 W. Summit Pkwy., 315-8036 There are many reasons to visit this Kendall Yards gem, from the patio views overlooking the Spokane River to a menu dotted with house-smoked meats and the incredible country bread that’s a meal unto itself. This flavorful burger is a consistent highlight thanks to a chickpea patty seasoned with an array of MediterENTRÉE ranean spices (and more than Get the scoop on local a little garlic, it seems) and food news with our weekly topped with fresh cilantro, Entrée newsletter. Sign up butter lettuce, herb mayo and at Inlander.com/newsletter. a brioche bun that is almost worth the price on its own. Be forewarned: Grab your burger too hard when you’re hungry and the patty might squeeze out the side of the bun. But not to worry, it will maintain its structural integrity enough for you to pick up the chunk to savor that last bun-free bite.

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BLACK BEAN BURGER ($11)

Saranac Public House, 21 W. Main, 473-9455 This Main Avenue Spokane spot has a menu full of vegetarian, vegan and gluten-free options, but this burger might be a best of the lot. The patty of black beans, onions, bell peppers and jalapeno give it a Southwestern spin, abetted by the chipotle vegenaise or smokey vegan cheese offered as toppings for the burger presented on a whole wheat bun. Throw some vegan mac and cheese or vegetarian chili on the side and you’re living hearty and healthy. n

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First Bite

THE BURGER ISSUE

FOR SECOND HARVEST Presented by

Get the first taste of what’s on the menu this year during Inlander Restaurant Week, accompanied by artisan cheese and wine from Washington.

The Impossible Burger is made from plants, but tastes like beef.

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Beyond Impossible TWO LOCAL RESTAURANTS ARE NOW SERVING THE LEADING BRANDS IN SUSTAINABLE, BEEF-LIKE PATTIES

BY CHEY SCOTT

T

hough humans haven’t yet perfected labgrown meat, food scientists have finally mastered the art of the meat-like, all-plant patty. Leading the charge — and the buzz — is the Silicon Valley-developed IMPOSSIBLE BURGER, an all-natural patty made from wheat, potatoes, coconut oil and heme, an iron-based compound abundant in red meats. The heme helps the product sizzle, “bleed” and purportedly smell as close to beef as a lab-made burger can get, sans steer. Acclaimed chefs and food critics both are in awe of the Impossible Burger; some even saying it’s difficult to distinguish its traits from actual ground beef.

In the past year and a half, the Impossible Burger has gradually expanded its reach across the U.S., though it’s only served in select restaurants. Until very recently, the nearest you could find it was in Seattle and Portland, but one Spo-

kane spot (so far) is offering the Impossible on its menu: Cascadia Public House. There, the plant patty is topped with butter lettuce, tomato, red onion, house fry sauce and the option of cheese, albeit for a bit steeper a price ($16, comes with a side) than its all-beef competitors because of the product’s higher wholesale price.

“We have a lot of vegans and vegetarians coming in who are excited about it, but there’s even a level of intrigue from non-vegans who’ve wanted to try it and see if they could tell the difference,” says Cascadia co-owner Jordan Smith.

It’s even duped practicing vegans who thought the kitchen accidentally made them beef, he adds.

But what’s so great about making a plantmade patty taste, look and feel like meat, when vegetarians and vegans have plenty of delicious options already? Environmental impact: “Com-

EVEN MORE WORTHY BURGERS 24 Taps Burgers & Brews, 825 W. Riverside Barlow’s at Liberty Lake, 1428 N. Liberty Lake Rd. Cougar Country, 760 N. Grand Ave., Pullman Crafted Taphouse & Kitchen, 523 Sherman Ave., CdA D. Lish’s Hamburgers, 1625 N. Division Dick’s Hamburgers, 10 E. Third Fatburger, 1706 W. Francis; 100 N. Hayford, Airway Heights Ferguson’s Cafe, 804 W. Garland Hogan’s Diner, 2977 E. 29th Ave. Hogwash Whiskey Den, 304 W. Pacific Ave. Hop Jack’s, 9265 N. Nevada; 14700 E. Indiana, Spokane Valley Laguna Café, 2013 E. 29th Ave. Manito Tap House, 3011 S. Grand Blvd.

MickDuff’s, 312 N. First, Sandpoint The Onion, 302 W. Riverside; 7522 N. Division Post Street Ale House, 1 N. Post The Ram Drive Inn, 34608 N. Newport Hwy., Chattaroy Remedy, 3809 S. Grand Blvd.

Roger’s Ice Cream & Burgers, 1244 Sherman Ave., CdA The Rusty Moose, 9105 W. Highway 2, Airway Heights Sweet Lou’s, 477272 Hwy. 95, Ponderay, Idaho Thrifty Scotsman, 12024 E. Sprague, Spokane Valley The Viking, 1221 N. Stevens Wisconsinburger, 916 S. Hatch Zip’s Drive In (multiple locations)

pared to cows, the Impossible Burger uses 95 percent less land, 74 percent less water, and creates 87 percent less greenhouse gas emissions,” the brand’s website claims.

Inlander hot take: I, too, was stunned at how eerily close to the texture, flavor and look of ground beef the Impossible Burger truly is. If you put one side-by-side with, say, a standard drive-thru hamburger, I truly believe many tasters would be hardpressed to determine a difference.

A

nother meat-like burger currently being served on at least one other local menu (it’s also found at some area grocers, in the meat aisle) is the BEYOND BURGER. It’s slightly less meaty-tasting than its aforementioned competitor, but still stands out from other faux meats on the market, and is thus worth trying.

Made by Beyond Meat from pea protein isolate, canola and coconut oils and beets, the Beyond Burger is also soy- and gluten-free. Now that it’s being distributed locally by food services company Sysco, area restaurants can offer their own creative takes on the innovative beef-subbing patty. The Lantern Tap House in the South Perry District is the first known restaurant to do so, offering the Beyond Burger as its January burger special ($14, with a side), and potentially as a menu mainstay if it sells well, says Lantern kitchen manager Alexandria Fisher. She and her team are topping the Beyond with an ale mustard, arugula, red onions, smashed garlic and a Sriracha drizzle.

“It’s a really good option for people who used to eat meat, or just don’t like meat and want to have a burger,” Fisher says. “We think it tastes great and want people to come try it even if they aren’t vegetarian and they do like hamburgers.”

Inlander hot take: While I personally prefer the Impossible over the Beyond as a beef burger replacement, I’ve also made this one at home and think the Lantern’s prep is far better. (The spicy arugula and mustard perfectly complement the savory and slightly sweet patty.) The Beyond Burger’s texture and flavor, however, still far outpace other mainstream veggie burger brands’ products, like Boca and Morning Star. n

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THE BURGER ISSUE

Chef Adam Hegsted’s new burger spot is set to open later this month.

Incredible Eats CHEF ADAM HEGSTED’S NEW INCREDIBURGER & EGGS OFFERS A MASHUP OF CREATIVE BURGERS AND CLASSIC BREAKFAST EATS IN DOWNTOWN SPOKANE

BY CHEY SCOTT

B

y the time readers are holding this issue in their hands, the latest culinary creation from Spokane chef and restaurateur Adam Hegsted will either be open, or just days away from its debut. Aligning perfectly with the timing and theme of the Inlander’s first-ever Burger Issue, Hegsted’s latest — becoming his seventh regional restaurant project — is called IncrediBurger & Eggs.

Hegsted describes his new, burger-centric downtown Spokane spot as having an upscale, yet fast-casual concept. There’s no table service; after placing an order at the walk-up counter — or by using one of the restaurant’s self-service kiosks — customers get a number for order pick up at the counter when ready. Orders can also be made online for pick-up.

“We wanted to make it really approachable and convenient and delicious,” Hegsted says. “We’ve been working on a burger concept for a while, and then this spot opened up.”

Despite being considered in the realm of “fast-casual,” make no mistake that the quality of ingredients at IncrediBurger, nor the offerings of both classic and creative takes on the American grill staple, will be any less than can be

32 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

expected from Hegsted’s many other restaurant kitchens.

Still, the majority of burgers on the menu are priced at $7, and any can be ordered with a gluten-free bun, sans bun or with a lettuce cup. Sides to add on include beef-fat fried french fries, sweet potato tots, vodka-battered onion rings, fried pickles and poutine (from $4-$8).

The beef is regionally sourced, and all the burger components, from buns to sauces and even American cheese, are being be made in house, Hegsted says.

IncrediBurger’s signature patty blend is seasoned with a special umami seasoning which Hegsted and his team have been developing since participating last year in the James Beard Foundation’s Better Burger Project.

“It’s a Japanese flavor sensation that gives you a really mouth-savoring sensation,” he explains. “It’s like what’s in soy sauce, parmesan reggiano, dried mushrooms and also seaweed. It’s almost salty without being salty.”

On the burger list, IncrediBurger starts with staple sandwiches; the Pure Gold (Wagyu beef with aged cheddar, truffle foie gras mayo, chianti jam and pickled mustard seeds) and the Classic (lettuce, grilled onions, tomato, ketchup, “incredisauce” and pickles; add cheese

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

or bacon for $1). There’s also a PB&J burger with jalapeno jelly, peanut butter sauce and thai aioli, a Mexicaninspired sandwich, a blackened steelhead burger, the vegetarian-friendly “Lil Greeky” chickpea patty with cucumber, hummus, onion and tzatziki, among several other variations on a formed patty between bread.

The second half of the restaurant’s name is a nod to the eatery’s all-day, egg-centric breakfast sandwiches; all but a few are $5 each. There are classics with bacon or sausage, eggs and cheese, along with some less traditional takes, which typify Hegsted’s comfort food mash-up style.

The Panwhich ($5), for example, has a mini-pancake maple syrup bun topped with house-made turkey sausage, an over-medium egg, cheddar cheese and smoky aioli. Breakfast items also include egg scramble bowls ($7); other morning-inspired sides include home fries, pancakes, buttermilk biscuits and donuts.

IncrediBurger’s third focus is what Hegsted calls “boozy milkshakes” ($11/each; all will also be available without blended spirits for $4 each) which are housemade ice cream blends in flavors like chocolate-avocado, Nutella, cinnamon toast crunch and toasted honey butter.

“It’s sort of a little blend of old and new. We wanted a soda-pop feel but we have a lot of modern touches,” he says. “We’ll have old-fashioned Coke bottles and we’ll have retail wine.”

IncrediBurger’s bar will serve beer, wine, cider and kombucha on 12 taps, in addition to non-alcoholic fountain sodas, bottled wine and beer, craft cocktails, mimosas and bloody marys.

Keep an eye out for an opening date on Facebook. n IncrediBurger & Eggs • 909 W. First Ave • Hours TBA (to be open early for breakfast) • Facebook.com/ incrediburgerandeggs • 443-4215

SCHEHERAZADE SAT, JAN 27, 8PM SUN, JAN 28, 3PM ECKART PREU, CONDUCTOR MIRA WANG, VIOLIN

The Spokane Symphony brings Rimsky-Korsakov’s Scheherazade from Arabian Nights along with soaring melodies by Bach. Also enjoy a new work

by Torsten Rasch featuring violinist Mira Wang Sponsored By: Maxine Kopczynski, The Heaton Family

JUDY COLLINS The wrong fry can make a good burger feel ordinary.

You Want

Fries

with That?

WHY EVERY SERVER SHOULD BE ABLE TO ANSWER THE QUESTION: WHAT KIND OF FRIES DO YOU HAVE?

BY WILSON CRISCIONE

I

n a downtown Spokane restaurant recently, I found myself in a conundrum. As I saw it, I had two options: Order a burger and fries, because all burgers are good, and I really felt like some fries. Or, order a completely different item on the menu: a Mexican dish that didn’t come with fries, might not be good at all, but would allow me to tell myself that occasionally I, too, can try something different for a change.

It all hinged what kind of fries they were serving.

Were they steak fries that I could dip into tartar sauce? Shoestring fries that I could gobble up by the handful? Home fries that, as we know, are not really fries at all?

Good fries with a burger can make a fantastic meal. The wrong fries? They make a good burger forgettable. So I asked the waiter.

“Steak fries,” he said.

Sold. I got the burger.

When the food came out, however, I felt duped. These were not steak fries at all! These were traditional, standard-cut fries with some seasoning. They were good, but not what I wanted

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

that night.

This is a problem I run into often in Spokane. I always ask what kind of fries a restaurant has. Too frequently, the waiter is wrong, or tells me they’re “just, you know… regular,” perplexed that I would ask such a question.

No longer do they have an excuse for that answer. Here, we’ve rounded up a basic list of all the different types of fries to pair with a burger, and where to find them in Spokane: The standard-cut fry: The most versatile of all the fries. All they need is salt. Some places load them with their own seasoning, and, hey, that’s fine too. (Find them at Mary Lou’s Milk Bottle.)

The beer-battered fry: My favorite fry. It’s crunchy where you want it, soft where it counts, and full of flavor. (Satellite Diner and Lounge) The thin-cut fry: The classic, golden, McDonald’s-style fry. Not quite shoestring-width, but still easy to eat way too fast. (D’Lish’s and Dick’s) The crinkle-cut fry: The Ruffles of fries — they have ridges! You must dip them in fry sauce.

(Zip’s and Bruchi’s) The steak fry: More potato for your money.

(The Onion and Red Robin) The shoestring fry: Small, and easy to grab a handful to stuff in your mouth. (Post Street Ale House and Steelhead Bar & Grille) The waffle fry: Elusive, cumbersome, but so, so good. (Flamin’ Joe’s) The garlic fry: A normal, run-of-the-mill, standard-cut fry with a garlic makeover. (Durkin’s and The Blackbird) The curly fry: Usually an alternative to traditional fries, but definitely more deserving of the spotlight. (Arby’s) n

SAT, FEB 3, 8PM

JORGE LUIS UZCÁTEGUI, Conductor Judy Collins, Vocals

Award-winning singer/songwriter, Judy Collins, has inspired audiences for decades with folk standards... including her newest Grammy-nominated Silver Skies Blue.

Sponsored By: Sherry and Frank Knott, Endowed Concert Sponsorship Tony & Mary Lou Bonanzino, Latah Creek Wine Cellars

BACH, BEETHOVEN & SHOSTAKOVICH SAT, FEB 10, 8PM SUN, FEB 11, 3PM DANIEL HEGE, Guest Conductor BRUCE BODDEN, Flute

Beethoven’s fifth, Bach’s suite for flute and a hauntingly beautiful Chamber symphony by Shostakovich Sponsored By: Jay Franz and JC & Roberta Hodgson on behalf of Bethel College, Kansas

(509) 624-1200 • SpokaneSymphony.org Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox

INTERNS WANTED *

THE INLANDER IS HIRING Spring 2018 interns to contribute to the paper’s News and Culture sections.

Eligible applicants must be currently enrolled in a college degree program, and available for 10-15 hours a week.

TO APPLY Send your resume, cover letter and three writing samples to intern@inlander.com. * Interns must provide own fedora and press badge. Positions are unpaid.

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 33

Christ Kitchen is a Christ-centered ministry providing

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The goal of Christ Kitchen is to offer a nurturing, healthy, caring environment where women learn work skills and life skills and also meet relational needs.

Christ Kitchen Cafe Stop in today for sandwiches, paninis, soups, salads, and a variety of delicious treats.

Open Tues-Fri 10-5pm & Sat 10-3pm

Want to get involved or volunteer?

Call 509-325-4343 Offering: Full Service Catering, Delivery and Box Lunches 34 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

Visit us online for Gift Baskets, Gourmet Mixes, and more! We Ship!

2410 N Monroe St, Spokane 509-325-4343 • christkitchen.org

THEATER

Kill Your Darlings Edward Albee’s classic goes in the round

BY E.J. IANNELLI

T

hinking of theater in the same terms as spectator sports might not always stand up to scrutiny, but for a play like Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, the reasoning is a little more sound. Although George and Martha, the middle-aged married couple at the center of Edward Albee’s 1962 play, never land an actual punch, they subject one another to an unrelenting barrage of abuse, the goal of which appears to be to leave their adversary not just defeated but wholly, utterly broken.

It’s a sad, twisted game, even if its rules, somewhat crucially, are supposed to be known only to them.

And like trained athletes, there’s an art in the way

that each of them plays that game. As might befit a professor of history — or, as Martha would insist, associate professor — at a respected college, George tends to more cerebral, using psychological setups and feints to catch his opponent off guard. His wife, on the other hand, is confrontational, with brute-force affronts designed to maim and humiliate.

“She’s pugilistic, all right,” says Mary Starkey, “but it comes from deep anger, frustration and sadness. You know, I heard one time that men express deep sadness as anger, and women express deep anger as sadness. I think Martha responds in a lot of ways more like a man.”

Starkey is playing Martha in a new production of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? in the Spokane Civic Theatre’s downstairs studio space, where she’ll appear opposite Jamie Flanery as George and alongside Danny Anderson and Emily Jones as the couple’s unsuspecting guests, Nick and Honey. Directed by Troy Nickerson, this show will move into the round, which means that Martha and George’s living room will be surrounded by the audience on all four sides. Like a boxing ring.

“It should be pretty intense,” Nickerson says. He’s been working with experienced set designer Matt Egan to ...continued on next page

Expect added intensity in the Civic’s unique staging of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? JEFF FERGUSON PHOTO

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 35

CULTURE | THEATER

Start Now Event

“KILL YOUR DARLINGS,” CONTINUED... accommodate the unconventional arrangement.

“It’s just furniture in the middle, and I’m having a beamed ceiling that’s just hanging free.

And then there will be cutout archways, not even full arches, that will be hanging from the ceiling and go to different parts of the house. The front door won’t even be a real door. It will be a cutout frame. It just puts you right in the middle of it.

Now I can’t even quite picture how I would have done it any other way.”

Being in the round calls for other changes too. Along with the slightly abstracted doorways, Nickerson says that a “light shift in how the actors are handled” is required as the actors perform for eyes on four planes instead of one.

“You just learn how to play that space so that you give the audience the best perspective,” says Starkey. “They’re going to be there with us in the midst of this little party that we’re throwing. I sort of dig it. I think you have to be conscious of the audience because they are so close in, but it’s more the placement of your body in the space.”

As it turns out, the actors’ onstage positioning, or blocking, wasn’t the only subject of debate. During rehearsals, Starkey and Flanery sharply disagreed on the amount of blame their respective characters bear for an evening that proceeds from drunkenness to destruction to despair.

“I remember at one rehearsal [Jamie] said to me, ‘The fact that this evening falls to crap is all your fault.’ And I said, ‘Now hold on a second, buster. You start picking on me in front of the

Need to start or finish the enrollment process?

Stop by to take the next step in starting classes this spring.

January 22, 29 & February 5 7:30 am - 5:30 pm Spokane Community College 1810 N Greene St | Building 15 | Spokane, WA For more information, contact: Abby Monta at 509-533-8227 or abby.monta@scc.spokane.edu

Community Colleges of Spokane provides equal opportunity in education and employment. J

guests as soon as they walk in the door,’” says Starkey.

“Arguing about who’s really at fault, I just let them go at it a bit,” Nickerson laughs. “Neither one of them wanted their characters to be to blame. I think it’s good for them to battle that out on their own.”

Drawing parallels with the life and suicide of Virginia Woolf, she also came to the conclusion that the couple’s shared frustrations stem from society’s strict gender MORE EVENTS roles and their Visit Inlander.com for inability to complete listings of fulfill those local events. roles — to the point that they construct a “very sweet and very bizarre” fiction as the cornerstone for their relationship, a fiction that George is ultimately compelled to destroy.

“That shows George’s wisdom and really his love,” she says. “By saying, ‘This private thing that we had, that has been a comfort to us, that we have delved into as fantasy to get through day to day, I’m going to kill it.’ That’s one of the reasons why, in the end, [Martha is] worn out and sad, but there is a glimmer of hope.” n Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? • Jan. 19-Feb. 11 • Thu-Sat, 7:30 pm; Sun, 2 pm • $27 • Firth J. Chew Studio at the Spokane Civic Theatre • 1020 N. Howard • spokanecivictheatre.com • 325-2507

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36 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

TO S U B M I T A Q U E S T I O N FOR OUR SPEAKERS I N A DVA N C E

V I S I T P H C .O R G

CULTURE | DIGEST MASTER OF THE LOW END

GLENN FRANCIS PHOTO, WWW.PACIFICPRODIGITAL.COM

Stormy Does Spokane ON THIS WEEK’S PLAYLIST Some noteworthy new music arrives online and in stores Jan. 19. To wit:  FIRST AID KIT, Ruins. These Swedish sisters create mesmerizing folk-rock.  GLEN HANSARD, Between Two Shores.

You know you loved Once.  FALL OUT BOY, MANIA. Managing to find a way to stay relevant long after their sell-by date.  tUnE-yArDs, i can feel you creep into my private life. Now a duo, the band tackles serious topics via seriously catchy songcraft.

THE SPITOONS OF WEST OF LOATHING There’s plenty to praise about the role-playing computer game West of Loathing, with its stick-art charm, creative puzzles and zany plot that pits demon cows against bloodthirsty clowns. But I want to specifically give the quality of the game’s spittoon-writing a shout-out. In this Wild West adventure, you can find powerful loot plenty of places, including in spittoons. But first you get to wade through paragraphs of delightful details about exactly how uniquely disgusting each spittoon is as you fish your hand around the slimy, stinky, foul, crusty spit-slush in search of treasure. Every detail is revoltingly brilliant. Think of it like the dirty Aristocrats joke for the fourth grade set. (DANIEL WALTERS)

T

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

he Wall Street Journal reported last week that a lawyer for Donald Trump, the president of our great nation, doled out $130,000 to a former adult film star named Stormy Daniels right before the election.

They had had an affair, it was alleged, and Trump was buying her silence.

Most people on Twitter were laughing about the story. I, meanwhile, was wistfully reminiscing. See, Stormy Daniels and I go way back. In fact, we once worked together.

In 2008, I was a production assistant on the set of a movie called Finding Bliss, a comedy set in sunny Los Angeles and so therefore had to be filmed in the dead of winter in Spokane. As a production assistant, my job was to be there all day, every day, making sure the actors were on set and on time, to always be amenable and yet out of the way.

THE BUZZ BIN As a cinema-obsessed 19-year-old, the very notion of rubbing elbows with actors and producers was a dream come true, even if I was merely fetching their coffee. And what divine providence that Finding Bliss should be the story of a starry-eyed novice with Hollywood aspirations. Leelee Sobieski plays a struggling aspiring director, and she can’t believe her good fortune when she lands an interview at a big-time movie studio.

But when she shows up, she discovers that it’s actually — comical record-scratch sound effect — a porn studio!

To lend the film some much-needed legitimacy, actual porn actors were brought in to play some of the roles, acting alongside the likes of Jamie Kennedy, Denise Richards and Kristen Johnston. One of those ringers was Stormy Daniels.

Stormy was only there for a day or two. I remember walking with her to the set, and her telling me how beautiful she thought the Pacific Northwest was and how she had visited once before when she was younger.

I remember the Hollywood actors sitting around and listening to her stories about directing and performing in XXX-rated material, no doubt hoping the knowledge could inform their performances. And I remember being surprised when I dropped off a call sheet at her hotel and found that she was actually staying there under her nom de porn and not, as I had been told, her real name.

As for Finding Bliss, there’s a reason you’ve never heard of it. It’s a terrible film. A decade later, Stormy isn’t working in movies anymore, and, well, neither am I. But like so much of Ms. Daniels’ work, Finding Bliss is available for free on the Internet, uploaded in its entirety to YouTube. If you happen to watch it, be sure to stick around through the end credits, where you’ll see my name scroll past. It’s misspelled. n

“It should be mandatory for every politician to learn an instrument. Then we’d just have a worldwide jam session.”

— VICTOR WOOTEN, Jan. 14 in Spokane Five-time Grammy winner Wooten, considered one of the greatest bass guitarists on the planet, played to a packed Bing Crosby Theater alongside Dennis Chambers (drums) and Bob Franceschini (sax), focusing on music from the trio’s new album, Trypnotyx. Sometimes the group would pause in the middle of a song to let Vic loose, playing medleys of “Brick House,” “Smooth Criminal,” “Amazing Grace” and a song off one of his solo albums, “My Life.” (MITCH RYALS)

SHOT OF SOUND You probably don’t need a reason to visit Dry Fly Distilling’s tasting room (1003 E. Trent) beyond the delicious cocktails, but now you have one.

Starting Jan. 19, there will be some live tunes every Friday from 5-7:30 pm — perfect timing for folks getting off work and looking to relax. Chad Moore gets it started this week; save some of the Triticale whiskey for us. (DAN NAILEN)

STOP ME IF YOU’VE HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE President Richard Nixon’s connection to the Watergate burglary, and his attempts to cover it up, led to his resignation. But there is much more to the story, which is the topic of Slate’s new podcast: Slow Burn. The miniseries gives listeners a sense of what it was like to live through the scandal, while asking the question: If we were living in another Watergate, would we know it? The first episode focuses on the wife of Nixon’s first attorney general, Martha Mitchell, who had a habit of talking to reporters. After the break-in in ’72, Mitchell was held in a California hotel room against her will and tranquilized so she wouldn’t squeal to the press about what she knew. “If it hadn’t been for Martha, there’d have been no Watergate,” Nixon told David Frost in 1977. (MITCH RYALS)

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 37

CULTURE | ZAGS

Food so good even our Moms eat here.

RAJAH BOSE PHOTO

wedonthaveone.com YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

RYAN SULLIVAN PHOTO

“...outstanding feats of agility, balance, coordination and showmanship..”

(Clockwise from left) Zach Collins, Kelly Olynyk and Domantas Sabonis are all making a mark in the NBA.

Pro Hoop Dreams

– The Boston Globe Sponsored by:

With more Gonzaga players heading to the NBA, the “mid-major” moniker doesn’t quite fit

BY TUCK CLARRY

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or Gonzaga and its men’s basketball program, the progression of players to the National Basketball Association is as good of a sign as any that the program is far bigger than their mid-major moniker.

The Zags have seen three of their players — Kelly Olynyk, Domantas Sabonis and Zach Collins — drafted in the lottery over the last five years. All left school early, with Collins becoming the first one-season-and-done player in program history. Prior to this run, the Zags hadn’t had a first round pick since Austin Daye in 2009.

Being able to point to your program’s draft history is a big win in recruiting. And not just with high school recruits, but foreign and transfer players as well. Olynyk’s skill progression and entrance into the league helped land Kyle Wiltjer when he transferred from Kentucky. And we probably wouldn’t be seeing Johnathan Williams in the Kennel if it weren’t for winning over guys like Wiltjer.

Without that trail blazed to the NBA, the Zags probably wouldn’t have landed new recruit Filip Petrusev, perhaps the biggest get in program history besides Collins. The four-star recruit

chose the Zags over offers from Kansas, Virginia and Arizona.

I

n terms of how Zags have adjusted to the league, it’s sort of a mixed bag.

Olynyk is in the first year of his freshly inked four-year, $50 million contract with the Miami Heat and playing the most minutes and the best basketball he has as a pro. The Heat staff believe that Olynyk can make another jump in his game. Major progression is nothing new to Olynyk, whose game blossomed after a redshirt season where he went from awkward tall guy to a ball-handling center and power forward who led Gonzaga to their first ever No. 1 NCAA tourney seed and No. 1 ranking in school history.

A lot was made when the Oklahoma City Thunder jumped on an opportunity to land AllStar Paul George by trading away Victor Oladipo to Indiana along with Sabonis, whom many analysts considered as a throw-in to make the numbers work.

Sabonis had a frustrating rookie season, lost in an offense centered seemingly on ensuring eventual MVP Russell Westbrook averaged

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Sophomore Rui Hachimura could be the next Zags big man to make a splash in the pros. a triple double for the season. The Thunder demanded Sabonis play outside; playing inside with the Pacers has turned Sabonis into the rebounding machine he was for Gonzaga. Gonzaga Coach Mark Few noted throughout Sabonis’ final season with the team that he was one of the best rebounders he’s ever coached. He had a natural ability to find where the ball would end up. Sabonis is averaging 12.5 points and 8 rebounds a game and has reached a double-double nine times this season.

“He just brings a calmness to the game when he’s out on the floor,” head coach Nate McMillan told NBA.com. “He just makes players better because he understands the game.”

For the first two months of the season Collins’ stat lines for the Portland Trailblazers were strings of “Did Not Play (coach’s decision).”

Collins needed to get stronger and learn a pro offense before gaining minutes. Since the beginning of December, Collins has seen a drastic jump in his playing time. Part of it is guys around him getting hurt, but part of it is also Collins proving himself a better option in the back of the rotation than Noah Vonleh, Moe Harkless and Meyers Leonard.

Perhaps Zag fans will balk at the idea of Collins learning in the pros rather than staying in school, but those fans probably haven’t had to make the decision between an internship and a seven-figure salary.

W

hat perhaps is most surprising with Zags translating their games towards the pros is the lack of guards breaking into the next level. Nigel Williams-Goss, last year’s team leader drafted by the Utah Jazz,

LIBBY KAMROWSKI PHOTO

found himself in a crowded backcourt and eventually headed overseas.

Kevin Pangos played for the Wizards’ summer league and was considered a catch as a heady, competent game manager, though he couldn’t stick the role. It’s become the norm for most Zags to further their playing careers overseas, usually in the competitive leagues in Spain and Eastern Europe.

Jeremy Pargo originally turned heads when he jumped to the European leagues after successful stints with the Memphis Grizzlies and Cleveland Cavaliers. He ended up taking more money and flourished with more playing time.

At Gonzaga this year, it seems unclear if there are any guys who will jump to the professional level early like Collins, Sabonis and Olynyk.

Sports Illustrated recently updated their 60-player “Big Board 3.0,” which listed sophomores Rui Hachimura (No. 48) and Killian Tillie (No. 55).

The profiles for the two are very similar, with neither able to truly stand out in such a loaded and balanced team. Tillie’s body isn’t completely there yet, though he’s shown great strides on defense and inside. For Hachimura, more play and consistent performances would land him a much higher spot than what he’s looking at currently.

His performance in international competition has also helped the buzz around his name and his athleticism seems to be an automatic check-off in terms of the eye test.

Both guys are integral to Gonzaga’s chances in March, and it wouldn’t be surprising if a tournament run opens enough eyes for one of these guys to go on to the next level. And if they do, there will surely be someone ready in the wings to be the next Zag with NBA aspirations. n

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JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 39

One on One

Regional chefs create themed menus featuring a single main ingredient for the Inland Northwest Food Network’s new pop-up dinner series

BY CARRIE SCOZZARO This acorn squash ravioli was on the first One Dinner menu in November.

W

hat can one chef do with one ingredient?

Let’s find out. That’s the gist of Inland Northwest Food Network’s new One Dinner series, which features multi-course dinners from six regional chefs on a bimonthly cycle through October.

The first dinner held in Coeur d’Alene last November featured locally grown, organic winter squash, a darling of the garden until one has more of it than recipes for its usage. Local chef and restaurateur Adam Hegsted, however, had plenty, using it in tzatziki over beef kebabs, as a chutney with baked Brie, in a salad, as a noodle, in a granita and in a delicious pumpkin pie.

“My favorite dish was the acorn squash ravioli with brown butter and warm feta,” notes inaugural One Dinner attendee Jennifer Fisk, who also liked the family-style setup of the event, and Hegsted’s explanations about the food.

Fisk hadn’t previously attended one of Inland Northwest Food Network’s event, but has since also gone to one of the nonprofit’s monthly “Drink This” events, a class at Up North Distillery in Post Falls.

“We attended [One Dinner] because we are foodies and love trying new and unique experiences,” she says.

Hegsted, whose growing restaurant brand Eat Good Group includes Gilded Unicorn and the forthcoming Incrediburger & Eggs (see page 32) in Spokane, along with Farmhouse Kitchen and Silo Bar in Sandpoint, was a natural choice to produce the inaugural dinner.

40 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

“The [Inland Northwest] Food Network is a really good fit for us because it does everything we do,” says Hegsted, who has helped shape the region’s food climate by building community through local food-focused events such as Crave Northwest food festival, which he founded in 2017.

“We can’t donate $10,000,” says Hegsted, who also serves on the Food Network’s board, “but we can help raise $10,000” through support from Eat Good’s businesses.

The chef has hosted previous fundraisers for various organizations at his Kendall Yards restaurant Wandering Table, for example. The restaurant’s name and concept found its start as a traveling supper club that in 2010 preceded the pop-up dining phenomena that continues to permeate the regional food scene.

F

or the next One Dinner event, Spokane chef and restaurant owner Tony Brown, of Ruins (and the former Stella’s Cafe), has signed on to showcase grains in an eight-course dinner on Feb. 1.

“We’re really trying to build a cuisine that is uniquely Northwest,” and that highlights ingredients that grow well in the region, explains Inland Northwest Food Network Founder Teri McKenzie.

“Hopefully by doing events like this we can point people in the right direction for how to use and where to get these great products,” adds Brown.

BRADLEY MARKS PHOTOS

GOING WITH THE GRAIN Palouse Heritage uses four terms to describe grains: landrace, heritage or heirloom, and ancient.

Landrace grains are the oldest cultivated varieties — wheat, barley, rye, oats and others — that existed prior to modern industrial methods designed to increase yield, resist pests and improve shelf-life. Examples include spelt and Persian khorasan.

Heritage or heirloom grains refers to pre-1950s varieties, including some post-1900s grains that have been hybridized through modern methods.

Ancient grains includes landraces as well as what Palouse Heritage calls “primitive ‘pre-wheat’ cereals like einkorn and emmer” which require a thin, yet indigestible, hull be removed to become edible. Varieties include millet, barley, teff, freekeh, bulgur, sorghum, farro and “pseudo-cereals” like quinoa, amaranth, buckwheat, and chia. (CARRIE SCOZZARO)

Brown, who’s known for his improvisational (and often rotating) menu prowess at Ruins, is still working out the dinner’s details, including specific dishes and whether or not the dinner will be held at his current location or a new venue he’s planning to open later this spring.

He is, however, sure about his collaborators: Don Scheuerman from Palouse Heritage farms, Culture Breads’ Shaun Thompson Duffy and Snacktivist Foods’ Joni Kindwall-Moore, whose company specializes in gluten-free and vegan mixes.

Chef Brown’s menu incorporates Palouse Heritage’s Sonora Gold and Purple Egyptian barley, as well as standard pearl barley, rye and farro. Based out of Endicott, Washington, Palouse Heritage specializes in grains dating to colonial times, including those grown in the Pacific Northwest as far back as the 1850s. (See “Going with the Grain.”)

The major details for this year’s remaining One Dinner series are mostly set except for October’s chef and ingredient. In April, chef Laurent Zirotti of Fleur de Sel will showcase eggs from EGA Farms out of Edwall, Washington, at an elegant dinner in the Post Falls restaurant he runs with wife Patricia.

Guests of the series’ first dinner enjoyed a squash-themed menu by Chef Adam Hegsted.

Zirotti will draw from his French heritage to create traditional dishes like egg en meurette (poached eggs in red wine) and ile flottante et oeufs a la neige, also known as Floating Island, a dessert of egg meringue atop an island of custardy crème anglaise. He also plans to prepare the more modern 63-degree egg, slow-cooked to perfection.

Spokane-based chef Jeremy Hansen (Santé Restaurant & Charcuterie, Common Crumb Artisan Bakery, Biscuit Wizard, Inland Pacific Kitchen and two forthcoming spots at the Ridpath) has signed on for June, while Travis Dickinson, formerly executive chef of Clover, and who’s soon opening his own downtown spot Cochinito Taqueria, will tackle August’s event (featured ingredients have yet to be selected for both summer dinners).

Money raised from the One Dinner series supports Inland Northwest Food Network’s various programming, including a book club, cooking classes, nutrition-oriented activities for kids, meet-your-farmer events and other efforts, such expanding more of its footprint into Spokane, adds nonprofit director McKenzie.

Although the network originated and is based in North Idaho, it’s experienced increased regional interest in its mission of “connecting people, place, food and farm.”

Although nothing comparable to the Inland Northwest Food Network exists in Spokane, Hegsted says he believes the organization’s overall mission cares little about the boundaries of cities or towns or even states.

“I see it as a regional identity,” says the chef, who operates restaurants in both Eastern Washington and North Idaho.

“I mean,” he adds, laughing, “the food doesn’t have borders.” n food@inlander.com One Dinner Series • Thu, Feb. 1 at 6 pm • Ruins • 825 N. Monroe • Upcoming events on April 23, June 4, Aug. 19 and in October (date TBA) • $70/person • Details and tickets at inwfoodnetwork.org • 208-546-9366

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 41

FOOD | EVENT

Feel the Burn Two upcoming dinners in honor of Scottish poet Robert Burns look to get locals in the spirit of celebrating Celtic culture

BY CARRIE SCOZZARO John Barleycorn was a hero bold, / Of noble enterprise; / For if you do but taste his blood, / ’Twill make your courage rise.

— Robert Burns, from “John Barleycorn: A Ballad”

R

obert Burns sounds like the kind of guy who knew how to have a good time.

Born in 1759, the well-educated Scot had long sideburns, a background in farming and a penchant for drinking scotch (whisky) and writing poetry. In his short life, he amassed 700 poems, ranging from his mock-epic narrative about the drunkard “Tam O’Shanter,” to a host of bawdy bits about sex, farting and other bodily functions. If you’ve ever sung “Auld Lang Syne” on New Year’s or used the phrase “for old time’s sake,” that’s Robert Burns.

As well known as he may be, Burns’ fire pales in comparison to the pyrrhic intensity of people’s thirst for scotch, although Burns did his part to promote the stuff, too. (Notice that

if it’s included after the word scotch, it’s spelled “whisky,” with no “e,” because in the same way champagne outside a specified region in France is just bubbly wine, only distilled grain alcohol made in Scotland can call itself “scotch whisky.”)

While the above two items — scotch whisky and poetry — are not necessary to enjoy oneself at a Robert Burns Night event, it may help explain the timing and tradition of the annual, worldwide event commemorating the birth of the Scottish bard, on Jan. 25.

O

n Jan. 24, Coeur d’Alene restaurant 315 Martinis and Tapas is hosting its first-ever five-course dinner ($40/ person) pairing a Scottish-inspired food menu with whisky, says owner Kris McIlvenna. The evening begins with cocktails and a pre-meal prayer in the form of a poem known as “Selkirk Grace,” commonly attributed to Burns.

The menu features a buttery apple tartlet

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Two local food-and-drink events celebrate the Jan. 25 birthday of Scottish poet Robert Burns.

with Scottish white cheddar, Scotch eggs — a hard-boiled egg wrapped in sausage, breaded and fried — and smoked salmon Forfar Bridies, pastries traditionally containing lamb. The main entrée is bourbon-glazed pork belly MORE EVENTS with 315’s spin Visit Inlander.com for on Clapshot complete listings of (potato and local events. root vegetable stew). Dessert is Tipsy Laird, which combines custard, fruit, cream, sponge bread and scotch.

Scotch whisky types being considered for the dinner’s pairings include single malts, distilled from barley mash and oak barrel-aged for more than three years, from a single producer like Lagavulin, along with Dalmore’s 12-year Highland, as well as blended scotch.

F

or an event more focused on Scottish culture than food or drink — and a chance to hear Burns’ poetry recited in the most confounding yet wonderful brogue — attend the St. Andrews Society of the Inland NW’s annual Robert Burns Night, on Jan. 27.

“Half the time I can’t understand a word,” laughs Marie Grimes-Darling, the society’s vicepresident who’s also an instructor at Spokane’s School of Highland Dancers.

The evening follows the traditional Burns Night format, beginning with a haggis ceremony.

Combining assorted lamb parts, a crumble of oats or barley, and seasoning baked into a cured sheep’s stomach (modern makers might

substitute parchment paper), haggis is held aloft throughout the room, accompanied by bagpipes, society member Jason Gordon’s reading of Burns’ Ode to a Haggis, after which a toast is offered and the savory pocket is cut open.

Although guests are encouraged to sample haggis, the evening meal is actually a buffet prepared by host venue Fort Mukogawa’s dining services. A full bar supplements the single malt scotch available for purchase.

Entertainment will be lively and educational, including performances by Angus Scott Pipe Band; the Scottish Country Dancers, Spokane Highland Dancers, and Lake City Highland Dancers; as well as music by Crooked Kilts and “social dancing” (similar to square dancing) with instructions for newbies.

The St. Andrews Society’s membership (joining is free), which Grimes-Darling estimates is about 250 in Spokane, will also honor its own, bestowing the Order of the Thistle and the Flower of Edinburgh to members for their distinguished service. The recommended dress for the Burns Dinner is semi-formal, which applies to kilts, too. n Robert Burns Whisky Dinner • Wed, Jan. 24 at 6:30 pm • $40/person • Ages 21+ • 315 Martinis and Tapas • 315 E. Wallace Ave., CdA • 315martinisandtapas.com • 208-667-9660 Robert Burns Night • Sat, Jan. 27; doors at 5, dinner at 6 pm • $45/adults; $30/ages 12 and under • Mukogawa Fort Wright Institute • 4000 W. Randolph Rd. • inlandnwscots.org

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 43

BOYS OF SUMMER The swooning, simmering Call Me by Your Name is a delicate work of art about a passionate summer romance

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

L

uca Guadagnino’s Call Me by Your Name is a film that vividly and convincingly communicates the intangible, that mysterious alchemy that happens when romantic longing gives way to lust and then blossoms unexpectedly into love. It’s the story of an impossible relationship — impossible not because it is forbidden, but because it comes with a built-in countdown clock — that intensifies over a single summer, and then diffuses like afternoon sunlight through the leaves of an apricot tree.

The movie opens in 1983, somewhere in northern Italy, on a sprawling villa surrounded by an orchard heavy with fruit. Our protagonist is Elio (Timothée Chalamet), an American 17-year-old who’s fluent in multiple musical instruments and languages. Every summer, Elio’s archaeologist father (Michael Stuhlbarg) hires an assistant to live in the family’s vacation home, and this year it’s 24-year-old Oliver (Armie Hammer), whose arrival in this sleepy Italian hamlet stops all of Elio’s female friends in their tracks.

But Elio finds himself just as besotted, although maybe he’s not exactly sure why. His fascination with Oliver initially appears to be the sort of innocent attraction that adolescents often feel about anyone who’s only slightly older and yet exudes the kind of confidence that seems almost supernatural when you’re a teenager. Hammer’s casting is one the film’s smartest gambits: He’s handsome in a way that’s both magnetic and strangely generic; we’re drawn to him while also projecting onto him our own notions of who he is and what he wants.

As Elio and Oliver bike through sun-dappled valleys by day and party in the open-air discotheques at night, they bond over their love of art and poetry, and how their Jewish heritage has made them feel like outcasts. Their flirtation begins as playful fraternization, an almost antagonistic, brotherly game of one-upmanship that has Elio adopting a swagger that fits him about as well as a suit that’s two sizes too big. He and Oliver share a bathroom, which inspires more furtive glances, and the occasional flash of accidental nudity.

Then comes the scene in which the two men finally confront one anoth-

44 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

er in the town square about their feelings, a small mases as much importance on mutual consent.) terpiece of performance and craft: It’s photographed The movie closes with two small but powerful moin a single take by Thai cinematographer Sayombhu ments: One is a perceptive and touching monologue Mukdeeprom, whose camera dreamily drifts between delivered by Stuhlbarg, and the other is a minutes-long the two men and the architecture that surrounds them, close-up in which the emotional gravity of the previous while a rippling piano piece by André Laplante ebbs two hours play out solely on Chalamet’s face. Both and flows on the soundtrack. Soon performances are remarkable, though like they’re running off together, sneaking the film they’re in, they don’t announce CALL ME a caress when no one’s looking, all the their greatness until the end, when the

BY YOUR NAME while aware neither of them are long weight of everything we’ve seen comes Rated R for Italy. barreling toward us.

Directed by Luca Guadagnino Amongst the film’s many rapturCall Me by Your Name was adapted Starring Timothée Chalamet, ous reviews (add mine to the pile) is from André Aciman’s 2007 novel by the Armie Hammer, Michael Stuhlbarg some pushback from both sides of the great James Ivory, and it often recalls the moral aisle — those who are scandalflorid, languidly paced period pieces he ized by the age difference separating Elio and Oliver, once made with his professional and personal partner, and those who have derided their sex scenes for being the late Ismail Merchant. Ivory has found an unlikely too chaste and sanitized. Both reactions, I think, misinkindred spirit in Guadagnino, a sensualist whose two terpret the movie’s purpose: Like Todd Haynes’ equalprevious films, I Am Love and A Bigger Splash, were ly brilliant romance Carol, this is a film less concerned awash in visual opulence and baroque in style. Call Me about its characters succumbing to carnal desires than

by Your Name is far more restrained by comparison, and it is what drives those desires, and there’s certainly while it’s lustier than any Merchant-Ivory production, nothing predatory or pruriit is similarly fascinated by the importance of what is ent about it. (I can’t said and not said. recall another In traditional romances, the two people who fall movie that in love are defined by one another: There’s a placpreordained set of circumstances designed to bring them together, immediately followed by manufactured obstacles that test their devotion or drive them apart. What’s different and refreshing about Call Me

by Your Name is that we understand Elio and Oliver as individuals long before they’re in the throes of passion, which makes the relationship more meaningful and its inevitable dissolution all the more heartbreaking.

It is a delicate work of art, simultaneously ethereal and earthy, the cinematic equivalent of a proclamation of undying love whispered in your ear on a moonlit night. n

FILM | SHORTS

This year, 12 Strong

OPENING FILMS 12 STRONG

FOREVER MY GIRL

CALL ME

BY YOUR NAME

MOM AND DAD

A true story about the first Special Forces who were deployed to Afghanistan in the weeks following 9/11 and witnessed the escalation of the war in the Middle East. Chris Hemsworth, Michael Shannon and Michael Peña star.

(NW) Rated R

One of the best films of the year, a swooning romance in which a 17-yearold American kid (Timothée Chalamet) spending a summer at his family’s Italian villa becomes infatuated with his dad’s slightly older research assistant (Armie Hammer). A delicate work of art and a passionate love story, simultaneously ethereal and earthy. (NW) Rated R

DEN OF THIEVES

A January release starring Gerard Butler that runs 140 minutes? This should be good. Here he’s an LAPD officer on the trail of an elusive group of bank robbers planning to knock over the Federal Reserve. (NW) Rated R

The 1973 kidnapping of oil fortune heir Jean Paul Getty III is dramatized in Ridley Scott’s dark thriller, as the teenager’s mother (Michelle Williams) tries to convince her miserly father-inlaw (Christopher Plummer) to cough up the ransom money. More concerned with methodology than motivation, well-made but emotionally uninvolving. (NW) Rated R

COCO

On the eve of Día de los Muertos, 12-year-old Miguel finds himself in the land of the dead, where he discovers he’s descended from a legendary Mexican musician. The latest from Pixar creates a vivid world and then runs around in it, all while conveying a message about the importance of family that actually feels sincere. (ES) Rated PG

THE COMMUTER

Liam Neeson plays a former cop who swings into action-star mode when a shadowy cabal offers him a fortune to locate a mysterious object on his train ride home. As preposterous as you’d expect, but only sporadically exciting.

(NW) Rated PG-13

with the Savings Earned from a Certificate or IRA.

In what’s sure to be the best Nicholas Sparks story Nicholas Sparks didn’t actually write, a hunky country star returns to his small hometown only to discover he has a daughter with the woman he left at the altar. (NW) Rated PG A young brother and sister must defend themselves from their parents when an unexplained hysteria possesses adults and drives them to murder their offspring. That Dad is here played by Nicolas Cage doesn’t bode well. (NW) Rated R

PHANTOM THREAD

A decade after their masterpiece There Will Be Blood, Paul Thomas Anderson reteams with Daniel Day-Lewis for this meditation about romance and aging in which a prickly, womanizing fashion designer falls in love with a much younger woman in the 1950s. (NW) Rated R

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to

DARKEST HOUR

Gary Oldman is unrecognizable under pounds of makeup and prosthetics as British Prime Minister Winston Churchill, who’s settling into his first term right as Hitler’s power intensifies.

If Oldman doesn’t take home the Oscar for this one, it won’t have been for lack of trying. (ES) Rated PG-13

FERDINAND

An animated adaptation of the 1936 children’s book about a misunderstood bull (voiced by former wrestler John Cena) who would rather frolic in fields of flowers than fight in an arena.

A smart, funny family film that espouses a refreshing message about gender stereotypes. (MJ) Rated PG

THE GREATEST SHOWMAN

A lavish, Moulin Rouge-y musical fantasy inspired by the life and career of P.T. Barnum (Hugh Jackman), the circus empresario who created modern show biz as we know it. The splashy songs are co-written by Oscar-winning La La Land lyricists Benj Pasek and Justin Paul. (NW) Rated PG

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I, TONYA

A raucous bio-comedy about figure ...continued on next page

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 45

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FILM | SHORTS

NOW PLAYING

skater Tonya Harding, who tripleaxelled into infamy in the early ’90s.

The film may be predicated on questionable morals — it wants us to laugh at its subjects, then condemns us for laughing — but it’s also centered on blistering performances by Margot Robbie as the disgraced Harding and Allison Janney as her monstrous mother. (NW) Rated R

THE INLANDER

JUMANJI: WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE

Classical Virtuoso Meets Late Night Comedy With an ensemble of musicians, enjoy familiar works from classical and pop along with threads of comedy and film.

The magical board game from that 1995 Robin Williams movie returns to the big screen, this time in the guise of an old gaming console that pulls some high schoolers into its perilous world.

Dwayne Johnson, Kevin Hart and Jack Black star as the kids’ in-game avatars.

(NW) Rated PG-13

LADY BIRD

Greta Gerwig’s first foray behind the camera is a funny, observant and empathetic coming-of-age story about a fiercely independent teenage girl finding her true identity in post-9/11 Sacramento. Saoirse Ronan is phenomenal as the title character, as is Laurie Metcalf as the mother she’s often at odds with.

A remarkably assured directorial debut.

At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Rated R

NEW YORK TIMES

VARIETY

(LOS ANGELES)

METACRITIC.COM (OUT OF 100)

CALL ME BY YOUR NAME

93

THE COMMUTER

56

DARKEST HOUR

75

I, TONYA

77

LADY BIRD

94

MOLLY’S GAME

71

THE POST

83

INSIDIOUS: THE LAST KEY

If horror franchises have taught us anything, it’s that the word “last” means nothing. This fourth Insidious movie, which delves into the backstory of the series’ central parapsychologist Elise Rainier, might wrap up the saga or inspire a whole new branch of spinoffs, but do you care either way? (NW) Rated PG-13

THE ZEPHYR FUND in memory of Kendall Feeney

CRITICS’ SCORECARD

DON’T MISS IT

WORTH $10

1970s Washington Post publisher Kay Graham (Meryl Streep) and editor Ben Bradlee (Tom Hanks) fighting for the paper’s right to publish the Pentagon Papers, which detailed the Johnson administration’s lies regarding the Vietnam War. A thrilling fact-based drama about the importance of the free press.

(MJ) Rated PG-13

PROUD MARY

Taraji P. Henson plays as an assassinfor-hire who becomes the unlikely chaperone of an orphaned boy whose father she killed. Hardly the cool, retro thriller it promises to be, a flat action movie that wastes the charisma of its star. (NW) Rated R

STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI

As the evil First Order tightens its grip on the galaxy, Jedi-in-training Rey and her fellow Resistance fighters team up for a last-ditch attempt at victory. The most anticipated blockbuster of the year seems to be dividing audiences, but love it or hate it, we should all be happy that the Star Wars universe still

WATCH IT AT HOME

SKIP IT

sparks fiery imaginative passion. (SS) Rated PG-13

THREE BILLBOARDS OUTSIDE EBBING, MISSOURI

When her daughter is murdered, an angry mother (Frances McDormand) erects a trio of uncouth billboards calling out the local police department, causing a stir in her tiny town. While the all-star cast delivers emotionally wrenching, award-worthy performances, writer-director Martin McDonagh’s inconsistent script occasionally veers into idiotic absurdity that undercuts the gravity of the drama. At the Magic Lantern. (SS)

WONDER

A little boy with facial deformities (Jacob Tremblay of Room) is sent off to a public school for the first time, with his encouraging parents (Julia Roberts and Owen Wilson) looking on. A sweet and gentle adaptation of R.J. Palacio’s bestselling YA novel that nonetheless bashes you over the head with its already obvious themes and messages.

(MJ) Rated PG n

MOLLY’S GAME

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Jessica Chastain is absolutely badass as Molly Bloom, a competitive skier who starts running high-stakes poker games in L.A. after an injury derails her career.

Aaron Sorkin’s directorial debut, based on a true story, is a hugely engaging movie that could represent a harbinger of good for women, from both Hollywood and reality. (MJ) Rated R

PADDINGTON 2

The second feature inspired by Michael Bond’s popular books follows the raincoat-wearing, marmalade-loving bear (voiced by Ben Whishaw) as he goes searching for a stolen present that wrongfully lands him behind bars. Sally Hawkins, Brendan Gleeson and Hugh Grant co-star. (NW) Rated PG

PITCH PERFECT 3

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46 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

The Bellas a cappella troupe reunite for one last gig during a haphazard USO tour in this third (and hopefully final) installment of the once enjoyable musical-comedy series. A flailing attempt to recreate the success of the earlier movies, without appreciating what made them work. (MJ) Rated PG-13

THE POST

Steven Spielberg’s latest concerns

The Polka King

NOW STREAMING

BEFORE I WAKE (NETFLIX)

A married couple recovering from the death of their young son adopts a meek little boy (Jacob Tremblay from Room), only to discover his dreams and nightmares come to frightening life. It’s a decent horror premise, but it doesn’t have many tricks up its sleeve once its rules are established. (NW) Rated PG-13

THE POLKA KING (NETFLIX)

The unbelievable true story of Polish polka musician Jan Lewan, who formulated a Ponzi scheme in which he sold phony shares in his Pennsylvania gift shop in the 1990s. Because it stars Jack Black, it reminds us of the similar and far superior Bernie, but his performance here is entertaining and complicated.

(NW) Not Rated

FILM | REVIEW

Tom Hanks is just the guy to defend the Fourth Estate in The Post.

Meet the Press

Steven Spielberg’s The Post transforms the black-and-white nature of journalism into riveting cinema

BY MARYANN JOHANSON

S

teven Spielberg has made movies about dinosaurs and sharks and aliens and archeologists and war horses and crime-predicting psychics and big, friendly giants. It’s probably not difficult to make such things exciting.

But this? The Post is a movie in which people sit around arguing about freedom of the press and journalistic ethics. Papers are shuffled and xeroxed. Lawyers are consulted. The most visually dynamic the movie ever gets involves the setting of hot type and the rattle of printing presses running off the next morning’s newspaper. And it is all completely riveting.

The Post crackles with life and energy. It depicts the real events of almost half a century ago with an urgent relevance for today. Spielberg is surely a genius for having accomplished this alone, but also for bringing Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep together onscreen for the first time.

They blaze with such chemistry that it’s astonishing to realize that no one has cast them opposite each other before.

As, respectively, Washington Post editor Ben Bradlee and publisher Katharine Graham — at a key turning point for the newspaper in 1971 — their characters have nothing but a purely professional relationship, and an antagonistic one, at that. (The business end and the reporting end should not be entangled if the journalism is going to be good, and they get a bit entangled here, which becomes a source of conflict.) It’s not romantic chemistry I’m talking about, but a rapport of the purest movie sort: These are two legendary actors at the tops of their games individually, who spark into something cinematically incandescent together.

What they are on fire over together is what turned out to be a signal event in the history of journalism. What came to be known as the Pentagon Papers was a secret analysis of the historical roots of the Vietnam War, a work commissioned by former Secretary of Defense Robert McNamara (Bruce Greenwood) under presidents Kennedy and Johnson. The documents came

to be known thus when they were leaked to the New York Times by military analyst Daniel Ellsberg (Matthew Rhys).

“They knew we couldn’t win,” Ellsberg says here, “and still sent boys to die.”

At first the Post is playing catch-up with the Times’ scoop, but when the White House gets an injunction against any further revelations from the Pentagon Papers being published by the Times, the Post steps up. It has gotten its hands on the documents, too, but can they publish? Does that injunction apply to the Post as well?

The Post isn’t a courtroom drama. It’s not about the two newspapers fighting this clearly unconstitutional injunction with THE POST lawyers. Something Rated PG-13 more fundamenDirected by Steven Spielberg tal is going on Starring Meryl Streep, Tom Hanks, here: Bradlee and Sarah Paulson, Bob Odenkirk Graham have to decide whether, in this chilly environment, it’s worth taking the risk to publish in the first place. Mostly, it’s down to Graham, and she’s in a tough spot. She’s about to take the family-run Post public, but the IPO can be scuppered by any controversy. Graham is already on thin ice as a woman holding unprecedented power in publishing. Would this double whammy simply be too much for investors to swallow?

The Post never outright asks the question, “why should news be profitable?” But it’s all over the film anyway. It’s full of confrontations between power and the imperative of speaking truth to that power, and it comes down on the Fourth Estate’s side every time. Spielberg has given us a grand adventure in journalism that is so essential today, when once again the president is publicly bashing journalists and attempting to smear their reporting as “fake news.”

It’s an essential reminder that the press is rightly an adversary to the powerful, one that is needed now at least as much as it was in 1971. n

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 47

The Mynabirds’ Laura Burhenn contemplates the state of the world on her new album Be Here Now.

ALYSSE GAFKJEN PHOTO

LET’S GET POLITICAL Songstress Laura Burhenn of the Mynabirds embraces protest music

BY HOWARD HARDEE

A

boom of protest music is underway in response to the increasingly intense dumpster fire of American politics, with artists as diverse as Fiona Apple and Run the Jewels speaking out to fist-pumping effect. Laura Burhenn, the L.A.-based singer-songwriter behind the Mynabirds, says it’s an encouraging movement. She’s been making politically charged music since the early 2000s, and she’s never understood why more artists didn’t protest the Iraq War specifically and the George W. Bush era in general.

48 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

“I remember thinking, ‘Where’s the protest music?

People should be upset about this,’” she says. “There’s been this ongoing debate about whether music should be political or just entertainment, and I’m excited to see this resurgence. In my mind, even when times are good, there’s always something that needs to be fixed.”

That’s why writing and recording the Mynabirds’ most recent record, Be Here Now, felt so urgent to Burhenn. The process was completed over a two-week period following President Trump’s inauguration and the

Women’s March on Washington, D.C., and the album reflects the personal turmoil she felt at the time.

On the single “Golden Age,” Burhenn sings sweetly over somber piano: “My heart’s full of love / And all kinds of peace / But I think even I / Could punch a Nazi in the face.” Burhenn fast-tracked the release of “Golden Age” last August, soon after throngs of white supremacists and protesters clashed in Charlottesville, Virginia.

“I was like, ‘I need to get this song out because Amer-

ica is going to come to its senses and all of this will be irrelevant soon,’” she says. “But since then it’s just been more of the same.”

S

peaking to the Inlander from Los Angeles ahead of the Mynabirds’ Sunday show at the Big Dipper, Burhenn explains that she started writing songs at age 7, starting with “very pro-Jesus” music she picked up from going to church. As a teenager, she progressed to emulating the chamber pop of Tori Amos, releasing her early recordings on a DIY record label she launched in high school.

“At the time, I thought it was so different and my own thing,” she recalls, “but looking back on it, I was definitely trying to be Tori Amos.”

Somewhere along the way, Burhenn developed into a force to be reckoned with, a songstress with electrifying energy and mad-crazy pipes. The Amos influence is still there — listeners may catch traces of Florence Welch, as well — but she’s definitely settled into her own sound.

“What I’ve come to realize [...] is that I’m always going to be political. I’m always skeptical when people say, ‘Well, now things are good.’”

In 2013, she served as a keyboardist, backup vocalist and vibraphone player on the reunion tour of Ben Gibbard’s electronic project the Postal Service. Similarly, when the time comes to tour with the Mynabirds, she recruits a rotating cast of friends to round out the live ensemble.

“It always feels like summer camp on the road,” she says. “We have a magical time with each other playing songs for people.

And in the studio, too, I collaborate with different producers.”

In creating Be Here Now, for example, she holed up with multiinstrumentalist producer Patrick Damphier at his huge warehouse space in Nashville. At the time, Damphier’s landlord was threatening to kick him out because the building was set for demolition to make way for new condos.

“Following Trump’s election, I asked if we could make a record in that studio, because it felt like a metaphor for what was happening in America,” Burhenn says. “We were getting pushed out of this space where we felt really safe, where we thought we were going to be forever. As we were writing the song ‘Cocoon,’ it was very much about the larger scale, but also about what was happening to the studio.”

A

s for Burhenn’s songwriting process, she usually doesn’t sit down and consciously hash out a song note-for-note.

Most of her musical ideas tend to strike while she’s doing something mundane, like walking her dog or taking a shower.

“Sometimes, I feel like a conduit,” she says. “There’s no ego involved, and I’m not trying to force this vision to happen. It’s more like there’s this song already out there in the universe and I’m just tuning into it and putting it on record. That’s when I feel like I’ve done something worthwhile.”

And she’s never shied away from tackling hot-button issues.

For example, on the Mynabirds’ 2012 album Generals, Burhenn reflected on the travesties of the Bush era.

“When I put it out, I really thought about the fact that we were in this kind of golden age [of politics],” she says of the Obama years. “But whatever, nobody’s perfect. I can agree with someone’s politics and still disagree with drone strikes and murdering civilians in the name of protecting American interests overseas. … What I’ve come to realize over the last few years is that I’m always going to be political. I’m always skeptical when people say, ‘Well, now things are good.’ You’ve always got to keep your eye out.” n The Mynabirds with Lenore and Mama Doll • Sun, Jan. 21 at 7:30 pm • $10 advance, $13 at the door • All-ages • The Big Dipper • 171 S. Washington • bigdipperevents.com • 863-8098

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 49

MUSIC | SOUND ADVICE

COUNTRY RANDY ROGERS BAND

T

here are country fans who will listen to anything that has just a little bit of twang to it, and then there are those diehards who go out of their way to tell you they only like real country, the kind that you heard on the radio when Johnny Cash and Merle Haggard were still alive. That latter group would no doubt be drawn to the Randy Rogers Band, who are perhaps more polished and pop literate than some of their outlaw forebears but are nonetheless more classically minded than many of their contemporaries. The six-piece band has attracted the attention of genre luminaries like Alison Krauss and Willie Nelson, who have cameoed on past albums, and their songs tend toward all the classic country staples — opining about long stretches of highway, lonely watering holes and the one that got away. Rogers and company recently recorded their ninth studio LP in Nashville, which seems about right.

— NATHAN WEINBENDER Randy Rogers Band with Shane Smith and the Saints • Sat, Jan. 20 at 8 pm • $15 • Allages • Knitting Factory • 919 W. Sprague • sp.knittingfactory.com • 244-3279

J = THE INLANDER RECOMMENDS THIS SHOW J = ALL AGES SHOW

Thursday, 01/18

219 LOUNGE, Joseph Hein and Mise J BOOTS BAKERY, The Song Project J BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB, Open Jazz Jam with Erik Bowen COEUR D’ALENE EAGLES, KOSH CORBY’S BAR, Open Mic and Karaoke CRAVE, DJ Stoney Hawk CRUISERS, Open Jam Night J HILLS’ RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, Floating Crowbar HOUSE OF SOUL, Take 2 JACKSON ST., Darren “D-Tox” Eldridge LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Dirk Swartz J THE LOCAL DELI, Ethereal in E J MONARCH MOUNTAIN COFFEE, Open Mic Hosted by Scott Reid NIGHTHAWK LOUNGE (CDA CASINO), PJ Destiny J J NORTHERN QUEST RESORT & CASINO, Night Ranger THE OBSERVATORY, Vinyl Meltdown RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos feat. Christan Raxter & Steve Ridler THE ROADHOUSE, Karaoke THE THIRSTY DOG, DJ WesOne ZOLA, Blake Braley

Friday, 01/19

ARBOR CREST, Craig Catlett J J THE BARTLETT, Noah Gunderson, Lizzy Gunderson BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn J THE BIG DIPPER, Over Sea Under Stone, Tsuga, Sons of Donovan BLACK DIAMOND, DJ Sterling BOLO’S, Haze BOOMERS, Wild Card J THE BUZZ, Dawna Stafford

50 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

ROCK HELL’S BELLES

I

n the world of cover bands, dudes who dress like AC/DC and perform under names like Shoot to Thrill or Back in Black are a dime a dozen. But Seattle-based Hell’s Belles aren’t your typical AC/DC act: The band is made up of all women, and they rip through the the Australian hard rock legends’ catalog like they’re on a highway to hell.

You’ll especially want to keep your eyes on livewire guitarist Adrian Conner, who takes on the role of showboating guitarist Angus Young, shredding in a plaid skirt as a tribute to his trademark schoolboy outfit. Expect to hear hits from every distinct era of the band’s long career, as well as tributes to the AC/DC members who have gone off to that great gig in the sky — original frontman Bon Scott and founding guitarist Malcolm Young, who died in November.

— NATHAN WEINBENDER Hell’s Belles with Elephant Gun Riot and Dogtown 420 • Fri, Jan 19 at 8 pm • $15 • All-ages • Knitting Factory • 919 W. Sprague • sp.knittingfactory.com • 244-3279

J CEDAR COFFEE, Lucas Brookbank Brown and Kaylee Goins CHINOOK STEAK, PASTA AND SPIRITS (CDA CASINO), Just Plain Darin CORBY’S BAR, Karaoke CRAVE, DJ Stoney Hawk CRUISERS, Karaoke with Gary CURLEY’S, Uppercut DEER PARK EAGLES, 3D BAND FARMHOUSE KITCHEN AND SILO BAR, Tom D’Orazi and Friends IDAHO POUR AUTHORITY, John Firshi

IRON GOAT BREWING, Wyatt Wood IRON HORSE (COEUR D’ALENE), JamShack JOHN’S ALLEY, Joseph Hein and Mise J J KNITTING FACTORY, Hell’s Belles (see above), Elephant Gun Riot, Dogtown 420 LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Nick Grow THE LOCAL DELI, Son of Brad MAX AT MIRABEAU, Kosta la Vista MICKDUFF’S BEER HALL, Devon Wade MOOSE LOUNGE, Whiskey Rebellion

NASHVILLE NORTH, Ladies Night with Luke Jaxon and DJ Tom NIGHTHAWK LOUNGE (CDA CASINO), Smash Hit Carnival NORTHERN QUEST RESORT & CASINO, DJ Patrick O’SHAYS, Arvid Lundin & Deep Roots PEND D’OREILLE WINERY, Brian Jacobs J THE PIN!, After Dark Black Light and Glow EDM Party PRIME TYME, Usual Suspects

RED ROOM LOUNGE, Jus Wright, The Naturalystics, Real Life Sound RIDLER PIANO BAR, Ron Greene RIPPLES, Mojo the Party Band THE ROADHOUSE, DJ Breeze SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE, KOSH SILVER MOUNTAIN, Echo Elysium J SLICE & BISCUIT, Pentley Holmes SOULFUL SOUPS, Ashley Pyle THIRSTY DOG, DJ WesOne & DJ Big Mike: I Love the ’90s ZOLA, The Cronkites

Saturday, 01/20

12 TRIBES RESORT CASINO, The Company Band 3RD WHEEL, Clayne Zollinger III J J THE BARTLETT, The Bartlett Awards feat. Jango, Deer, Chris Molitor, Newman BELLWETHER BREWING CO., Brian Griffing BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn J THE BIG DIPPER, Dysfunktynal Kaos, Sins and Sinners, Catalyst, Nogunaso BLACK DIAMOND, DJ Stud BOLO’S, Haze BOOMERS, Wild Card CHINOOK STEAK, PASTA AND SPIRITS (CDA CASINO), Just Plain Darin J J CLEARWATER RIVER CASINO, The Whispers COMMUNITY PINT, Nick Grow CORBY’S BAR, Perfect Mess CURLEY’S, Uppercut DAFT BADGER BREWING, Shakewell, Blake Braley Band FLAME & CORK, Jacob Maxwell GARLAND PUB, Usual Suspects J HOTEL RL AT THE PARK, A View of Earth from the Moon

GET LISTED!

Submit events online at Inlander.com/getlisted or email relevant details to getlisted@inlander.com. We need the details one week prior to our publication date.

HOUSE OF SOUL, Nu Jack City J HUCKLEBERRY’S, Pamela Benton IRON GOAT BREWING, Brook Gannon Trio IRON HORSE (CDA), JamShack JACKSON ST., Karaoke with James JOHN’S ALLEY, JJ Thames and the Violet Revolt J J KNITTING FACTORY, Randy Rogers Band (see facing page), Shane Smith and the Saints LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Chuck Dunlop MAX AT MIRABEAU, Kosta la Vista MOOSE LOUNGE, Whiskey Rebellion MULLIGAN’S, Kyle Swaffard NASHVILLE NORTH, Ladies Night with Luke Jaxon and DJ Tom NIGHTHAWK LOUNGE (CDA CASINO), Smash Hit Carnival NORTHERN QUEST, DJ Patrick J THE OBSERVATORY, Kali Masi, American Heretics, The Monties PACIFIC AVENUE PIZZA, Get Down in Brownes DJ Showcase THE PIN!, Black & White EDM Party POST FALLS BREWING, Pamela Jean PROHIBITION GASTROPUB, Joshua Belliardo J J RESURRECTION RECORDS, Silver Treason RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos RIPPLES, Mojo the Party Band THE ROADHOUSE, The Hankers SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE, KOSH SILVER MOUNTAIN, Ron Greene SLICE & BISCUIT, Brian Ellison STIX, My Own Worst Enemy THE THIRSTY DOG, DJ WesOne and DJ Big Mike: Sexy Saturday

WESTWOOD BREWING, Son of Brad ZOLA, The Cronkites

Sunday, 01/21

J J THE BIG DIPPER, The Mynabirds (see page 48) with Lenore and Sarah & Jen from Mama Doll DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS, Jam Night GARLAND PUB & GRILL, Karaoke IRON HORSE (VALLEY), Tommy G LINGER LONGER LOUNGE, Open Jam J MAX AT MIRABEAU, Dawna Stafford O’DOHERTY’S, Live Irish Music RIDLER PIANO BAR, Karaoke Night ZOLA, Lazy Love

Monday, 01/22

J BABY BAR, Dry Erase, Peru Resh, Stares J CALYPSOS COFFEE, Open Mic EICHARDT’S, Monday Night Jam RED ROOM LOUNGE, Open Mic with Lucas Brookbank Brown ZOLA, Evan Dillinger

Tuesday, 01/23

219 LOUNGE, Karaoke with DJ Pat J J THE BARTLETT, Northwest of Nashville feat. Jenny Anne Mannan, Laddie Ray Melvin, Bitter Oak, Justin Landis, Liz Rognes GARLAND PUB & GRILL, Karaoke LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Turntable Tue. RAZZLE’S, Open Mic Jam RIDLER PIANO BAR, Open Mic/Jam THE ROADHOUSE, Karaoke ZOLA, Dueling Cronkites

Wednesday, 01/24

BLACK DIAMOND, Dave McRae GENO’S, Open Mic J GONZAGA UNIVERSITY HEMMINGSON CENTER, Joshua Belliardo IRON HORSE (VALLEY), Gil Rivas JOHN’S ALLEY, That 1 Guy J J KNITTING FACTORY, STRFKR, Reptaliens THE LANTERN TAP HOUSE, Mama Doll and Friends LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Carey Brazil LUCKY’S IRISH PUB, DJ D3VIN3 J J NORTHERN QUEST RESORT & CASINO, Chicks with Hits: Terri Clark, Pam Tillis and Suzy Bogguss POOLE’S PUBLIC HOUSE, The Cronkites J POOLE’S PUBLIC HOUSE (SOUTH HILL), Just Plain Darin RED ROOM LOUNGE, Blowin’ Kegs Jam Session RIDLER PIANO BAR, The Ronaldos THE ROADHOUSE, Open Mic THE THIRSTY DOG, Karaoke ZOLA, Whsk&Keys

Coming Up ...

J NORTHERN QUEST RESORT & CASINO, Three Dog Night, Jan. 26 J THE BARTLETT, Banditos, Jan. 26 J KNITTING FACTORY, Josh Ritter and the Royal City Band, Jan. 26 J THE BARTLETT, Pickwick, Jan. 28 J BING CROSBY THEATER, Marc Cohn, Jan. 28

MUSIC | VENUES 219 LOUNGE • 219 N. First, Sandpoint • 208-2639934 315 MARTINIS & TAPAS • 315 E. Wallace, CdA • 208-667-9660 ARBOR CREST WINE CELLARS • 4705 N. Fruit Hill Rd. • 927-9463 BABY BAR • 827 W. First Ave. • 847-1234 BARLOWS • 1428 N. Liberty Lake Rd. • 924-1446 THE BARTLETT • 228 W. Sprague Ave. • 747-2174 BEEROCRACY • 911 W. Garland Ave. THE BIG DIPPER • 171 S. Washington • 863-8098 BIGFOOT PUB • 9115 N. Division St. • 467-9638 BING CROSBY THEATER • 901 W. Sprague Ave. • 227-7638 BLACK DIAMOND • 9614 E. Sprague • 891-8357 BOLO’S • 116 S. Best Rd. • 891-8995 BOOMERS • 18219 E. Appleway Ave. • 755-7486 BOOTS BAKERY & LOUNGE • 24 W. Main Ave. • 703-7223 BRAVO CONCERT HOUSE • 25 E. Lincoln Rd. • 703-7474 BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB • 201 S. Main, Moscow • 208-882-5216 BUZZ COFFEEHOUSE • 501 S. Thor • 340-3099 CALYPSOS COFFEE & CREAMERY • 116 E. Lakeside Ave., CdA • 208-665-0591 CHATEAU RIVE • 621 W. Mallon Ave. • 795-2030 CHECKERBOARD BAR • 1716 E. Sprague Ave. • 535-4007 COEUR D’ALENE CASINO • 37914 S. Nukwalqw Rd., Worley, Idaho • 800-523-2464 COEUR D’ALENE CELLARS • 3890 N. Schreiber Way, CdA • 208-664-2336 CRAFTED TAP HOUSE • 523 Sherman Ave., CdA • 208-292-4813 CRAVE• 401 W. Riverside • 321-7480 CRUISERS • 6105 W Seltice Way, Post Falls • 208773-4706 CURLEY’S • 26433 W. Hwy. 53 • 208-773-5816 DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS • 6412 E. Trent • 535-9309 EICHARDT’S PUB • 212 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208-263-4005 THE FEDORA • 1726 W. Kathleen, CdA • 208-7658888 FIZZIE MULLIGANS • 331 W. Hastings • 466-5354 FOX THEATER • 1001 W. Sprague • 624-1200 THE HIVE • 207 N. First, Sandpoint • 208-457-2392 HOGFISH • 1920 E. Sherman, CdA • 208-667-1896 HOTEL RL BY RED LION AT THE PARK • 303 W. North River Dr. • 326-8000 HOUSE OF SOUL • 120 N. Wall • 217-1961 IRON HORSE BAR • 407 E. Sherman Ave., CdA • 208-667-7314 IRON HORSE BAR & GRILL • 11105 E. Sprague Ave., CdA • 509-926-8411 JACKSON ST. BAR & GRILL • 2436 N. Astor St. • 315-8497 JOHN’S ALLEY • 114 E. Sixth St., Moscow • 208883-7662 KNITTING FACTORY • 911 W. Sprague Ave. • 244-3279 LAGUNA CAFÉ • 2013 E. 29th Ave. • 448-0887 THE LANTERN TAP HOUSE • 1004 S. Perry St. • 315-9531 LA ROSA CLUB • 105 S. First Ave., Sandpoint • 208-255-2100 LEFTBANK WINE BAR • 108 N. Washington • 315-8623 LUCKY’S IRISH PUB • 408 W. Sprague • 747-2605 MAX AT MIRABEAU • 1100 N. Sullivan • 924-9000 MICKDUFF’S • 312 N. First Ave., Sandpoint • 208)255-4351 MONARCH MOUNTAIN COFFEE • 208 N 4th Ave, Sandpoint • 208-265-9382 MOOSE LOUNGE • 401 E. Sherman • 208-664-7901 MOOTSY’S • 406 W. Sprague • 838-1570 MULLIGAN’S • 506 Appleway Ave., CdA • 208- 7653200 ext. 310 NASHVILLE NORTH • 6361 W. Seltice Way, Post Falls • 208-457-9128 NECTAR CATERING & EVENTS • 120 N. Stevens St. • 869-1572 NORTHERN QUEST RESORT • 100 N. Hayford Rd., Airway Heights • 242-7000 NYNE • 232 W. Sprague Ave. • 474-1621 THE OBSERVATORY • 15 S. Howard • 598-8933 O’SHAY’S • 313 E. CdA Lake Dr. • 208-667-4666 PEND D’OREILLE WINERY • 301 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208-265-8545 THE PIN! • 412 W. Sprague • 368-4077 RED LION RIVER INN • 700 N. Division • 326-5577 RED ROOM LOUNGE • 521 W. Sprague • 838-7613 REPUBLIC BREWING • 26 Clark Ave. • 775-2700 THE RIDLER PIANO BAR • 718 W. Riverside • 822-7938 RIVELLE’S • 2360 N Old Mill Loop, CdA • 208-9300381 THE ROADHOUSE • 20 N. Raymond • 413-1894 SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE • 209 E. Lakeside Ave. • 208-664-8008 THE SHOP • 924 S. Perry St. • 534-1647 SOULFUL SOUPS & SPIRITS • 117 N. Howard St. • 459-1190 SPOKANE ARENA • 720 W. Mallon • 279-7000 THE THIRSTY DOG • 3027 E. Liberty Ave. • 487-3000 TIMBER GASTRO PUB •1610 E Schneidmiller, Post Falls • 208-262-9593 ZOLA • 22 W. Main Ave. • 624-2416

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 51

Motown: the Musical packs 50 classic hits into its run time.

JOAN MARCUS PHOTO

THEATER DON’T FORGET THE MOTOR CITY

It’s hard to think of a way to create a more sure-fire people pleaser than to stuff a Broadway show with no less than 50 massive hits from the heyday of Motown. Motown: The Musical’s story is told from the perspective of label founder Berry Gordy, the man who gave artists like Marvin Gaye, Smokey Robinson, the Supremes and the Jackson 5 a platform to introduce the soulful and funky sounds of Detroit to the world.

Told in flashback from Motown’s 25th Anniversary celebration in 1983 (the show where Michael Jackson famously introduced his “Moonwalk”), you’ll meet a who’s who of ’60s and ’70s music royalty through this show likely to have people dancing in their seats at the INB. — DAN NAILEN Motown: The Musical • Wed, Jan. 24-Fri, Jan. 26 at 7:30 pm; Sat, Jan. 27 at 2 pm and 7:30 pm; Sun, Jan. 28 at 1 pm and 6:30 pm • $39.50-$79.50 • INB Performing Arts Center • 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd • inbpac.com • 279-7000

WORDS CIVIL RIGHTS FIGHT

Major Margie Witt was discharged from the U.S. military for being in a same-sex relationship, found in violation of the old “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy even though her sexuality was unknown until someone revealed it to her military superiors. Rather than go quietly, Witt and her now-wife Laurie Johnson went to court to fight the unfair policy, ultimately winning a landmark case that opened the military to all who want to serve. Witt and investigative reporter Tim Connor co-authored a book about the case, Tell: Love, Defiance, and the Military Trial at the Tipping Point for Gay Rights, and Connor will discuss the long legal road that led to Witt’s win.

— DAN NAILEN Tim Connor Discussion • Thu, Jan. 25 at noon • Free and open to the public • Gonzaga University, School of Law courtroom • 721 N. Cincinnati St. • gonzaga.edu

52 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

CLASSICAL VIOLINIST VARIETY

Mateusz Wolski is perhaps best known as the lead violinist and concertmaster of the Spokane Symphony — he’s the guy who the entire orchestra tunes to before every performance — but he’ll be wearing even more hats during a new variety show he’s hosting this weekend. “The ‘M’ Show” is being described as having the vibe of a late-night comedy show, with comic sketches and routines, both live and filmed, alongside a program of classical music selections performed by Wolski and an ensemble of some of his symphony colleagues. And don’t be surprised if Wolski’s penchant for auto racing is involved in some way. A second ‘M’ Show has already been scheduled for May. — NATHAN WEINBENDER The ‘M’ Show: Music, Mayhem and Mystery • Fri, Jan. 19 and Sat, Jan. 20 at 8 pm • $36-$54 • Washington Cracker Co. Building • 304 W. Pacific • spokanesymphony.org • 624-1200

Local WORDS TENNESSEE ELEGIES

IS ON THE MENU

The third reading for Eastern Washington University’s 2017-18 Visiting Writers Series, hosted by EWU’s MFA program and Get Lit!, brings Appalachian born and raised poet Jesse Graves to the Pacific Northwest. Graves’ work is resonant and relevant — he often explores themes of place as it pertains to the rural South, and generational changes that have occured in those communities. Graves has deep ties to the region himself, having grown up in a small Tennessee community first settled by his family’s ancestors in the 1780s. “I am interested in the role the speaker plays in poems, and all the varied experiences one might incorporate by expanding the canvas of possible voices,” Graves writes in an introduction to his recently published poem “Plaintive Lives.” The award-winning poet will read new and past work, including from his 2014 collection Basin Ghosts, the follow-up to his acclaimed 2011 debut, Tennessee Landscapes with Blighted Pine.

— CHEY SCOTT EWU Visiting Writers Series: Jesse Graves • Fri, Jan. 19 at 7:30 pm • Free • Auntie’s Bookstore • 402 W. Main • auntiesbooks.com • 838-0206

OUTDOORS SAVING THE SALMON

Dams along the many rivers of the Pacific Northwest are a familiar sight — there are more than 60 spread across the massive Columbia River watershed.

These man-made structures are crucial for the production of renewable energy that powers our homes, workplaces and schools. But what about the drawbacks, and how do we find the right balance between environment and economy? These questions, among many others pertaining to politics, wildlife and people, will be explored and discussed at a conversation with two Northwest journalists who’ve both extensively reported on dam removal and restoration: Lynda Mapes for the Seattle Times, and Rocky Barker for the Idaho Statesman. The event is co-sponsored by a long list of regional environmental advocacy groups. Make sure to RSVP if you plan to attend, as organizers are expecting a full house.

— CHEY SCOTT

FEBRUARY 22 - MARCH 3 InlanderRestaurantWeek.com

#InlanderRW Benefiting

A Tale of Two Rivers: Spokane • Thu, Jan. 25 from 6-9 pm • Free • Washington Cracker Co. Building • 304 W. Pacific • bit.ly/2r9LcWr • RSVP to jacob@wildsalmon.org

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 53

W I SAW YOU

S S

CHEERS JEERS

&

I SAW YOU SWEET TREAT I saw you on Sunday the 7th at Baskin Robins. You were pretty indecisive but ended up picking the cookie dough. I opted for a double scoop including brownie and cherry. I can’t get your smile and contagious laugh off my mind. Can I buy you a scoop sometime?

WE GOT IT RIGHT I noticed you long before you knew. Before long, I was mustering up the courage to start small conversations with you. You were helping me through life, Which you have continued to do everyday since. In the process of helping me battle through dead end relationships and pushing me to adventureI shared my hopes and dreams with you. You did not agree with all of them especially my fierce belief: butterflies day in and day out (that last past the first years...(maybe even forever), attraction, happiness, the excitement that is there in a fresh relationship can last forever. The reason people do not always have it is because they settle too soon in life. I believe in crazy, stupid, intense, honest, beautiful love is real and it is possible to be IN love for the rest of life. The more I knew you, the braver I became. I was actively drawn to you as a whole- physically, emotionally, spiritually. I still am. I knew it was out there. I didn’t know it would be with you. You are the most raw, talented, real, extraordinary, love of my life. Now more than ever, I only see you in a room full of people.

This is that passionate love I knew was real- it may be once in a lifetime. Life after you, i will be forever be settling.

I SAW YOU SPOKANE AIRPORT On Fri Jan 12th at gate C30 boarding a 5:12pm flight from Spokane to Seattle I had a teenage son and a very distraught daughter refusing to board the plane. It was a sad ordeal and a few people were close by hearing what was being said and talking to my daughter. Airport employees were great and handled situation properly but wanting to talk to others that witnessed this.

Please contact concernedmomc30@outlook.com Thank you

CHEERS KEITH AT AMC My son is a young man with special needs. He is very high functioning but some things confuse him.

Last month he went to see the new Star Wars movie at AMC Riverpark Square. He paid his money, got his popcorn but got to the theater after the previews started running so it was dark and crowded and he got confused and couldn’t find his seat. So he left. A few days later he tried again and I told him to get there early and find his seat before too may people were in the theater. He texted me excited that he had found his seat.

A few minutes later he texted me that someone said he was in their seat, so again he got frustrated and left the theater. I immediately called the AMC office, worried that I would not reach anyone and once again he would miss the movie that he had paid for twice! After a brief recorded message a young man named Keith answered the phone. I was so thankful I had reached a person! I told him our situation and he was very sympathetic and said to have my son come back to the theater and he would get him into the movie. He met my son at the AMC customer service desk and got him a seat to see Star Wars. What personal, understanding, responsive service. I was very impressed! Thank you Keith!

GARAGE HOSPITALITY Cheers to Lost Boys for admitting this beer loving

Seattle transplant into your clubhouse.

After welcoming me (loudly) as soon as I hit the door you proceeded to initiate me into Spokanes considerable craft beer scene. Your skilled (and hot) bartender knew her stuff and tickled my taste buds with River City Vanilla Bourbon Stout and Big Barn Nut Brown while quashing my hunger with a juicy Bacon Gouda burger.

She filled my head with info about which breweries to visit and where they were located and then sent me on my way.

Thanks for the great brews, tasty grub and welcoming staff!

“

JEERS SNOW JOB Jeers to the City of Spokane for its hypocrisy! Citizens can incur a fine of $115 for failing to shovel their sidewalk under city law yet the City of Spokane neglects to shovel the Monroe Street Bridge sidewalk which they own and are responsible for its maintenance. You owe yourself a $115 fine!

CABLE/INTERNET COST INCREASE, WHY? Why do I feel sad & hope-

CHEERS TO ALL LOVED ONES PAST....

Cheers and respect to all our friends that have past on...... Uncle Bobby, Shelly Taylor, Ken keeney, Will Anderson, Douglas Lowery, Big Brian, Jamie bishop.....R.I.P. IMMIGRANTS FROM ‘SH*THOLE COUNTRIES’ Stand proud for helping to make this country a diverse, beautiful place.

Some may feel immigrants (from nonwhite countries, of course) are taking our jobs, but many of us know there are plenty of resources, and jobs, to go around. Our leader is a racist, sexist, misogynistic son of immigrant parents... he doesn’t speak for the masses- only for the ignorant. My brother-in-law came from El Salvador- you know, one of those s-hole countries, and he is the most generous, kind-hearted, and hard-working men I know. Cheers to you, Serg, and all immigrants who make this country a more beautiful and unique place to live.

THANK YOU FOR LUNCH Thank you for buying us lunch at Le Brothers on Saturday. It was very generous of you. We paid it forward for the next customers.

You were a wonderful example of kindness for my children and I appreciate it more than you know.

1. Visit Inlander.com/isawyou by 3 pm Monday. 2. Pick a category (I Saw You, You Saw Me, Cheers or Jeers). 3.

Provide basic info: your name and email (so we know you’re real). 4. To connect via I Saw You, provide a non-identifying email to be included with your submission — like “petals327@yahoo.com,” not “j.smith@comcast.net.”

less when I send in my payment to this company, the richest cable company in the US, owner of NBC, & magnificent entertainment parks when they increase my internet service charge by $6.00. Because after doing business w/them for 12 years & having to give up too expensive cable, they insidiously sneak in this charge after giving me, just 2 months ago, a charge of $44.87 for just internet. (now $50.87) Are they so mighty that they don’t even have to give an explanation? No wonder why the Spokane community feels like they don’t matter.

RE: FAST FOOD WORKERS Hey buddy why don’t you find something else to complain about. Like we have other orders and if we screw it up maybe you should go somewhere else. And all the money you say you waste, why don’t you take your lazy a** and go buy groceries to “cook!” And when we have long hours without being able to take days off I think we are aloud to make a mess up or two. We’re only human like you buddy I mean unless your some sort of god that never messes up and makes mistakes!

“Excuse us your highness!” This society has so much to complain about its pathetic! Quit with the whining, excuses and everything. Do it yourself and quit being ignorant and lazy! We work hard enough as it is to have people making

HM, NOT A TEMPTING OFFER Attaction does not give you a right to someone’s

BUCK NIGHT

& MILITARY APPRECIATON JERSEY TOWEL GIVEAWAY

SATURDAY 1/20 vs. TRI-CITY AMERICANS The first 5,000 fans will receive a Chiefs Military Jersey Towel.

Plus $1 hot dogs and Coca-Cola products all night long.

Sponsored By:

Game Time:

www.SPOKANECHIEFS.com

7 PM

”

body. You are not entitled to a smile.

You are not entitled to a hello back. How about this; you leave someone alone that doesn’t want anything to do with you? I don’t have to talk or even acknowledge you, I shouldn’t have to smile at you to get you to leave me alone. I shouldn’t have to hope that you won’t follow me down the damn street if I don’t even look at you. You are not entitled to me, or anyone else. Get over yourself and leave people alone that don’t want to talk. Maybe, just maybe, I woke up this morning wanting to live my life and not have to deal with being hit on by dirty old men? One day without dealing with this crap would be nice. n

THIS WEEK'S ANSWERS G A D O A L I T P E A R C L O

E D A M

I V E N E V T H E

W I A S F M

G S T A R

T R I A G E

W I N D E D

T W H H E O O R L D F O R Y E P H A D I T E W H O S E O W E D O E N T Y F N C E U B E C L A R O N E I L A Z E

L E T A

O R C U E N A N S

P R E T I S T H I E D O S E E G O U N E N D O

P H O O E Y

I D U N N O

A L I S T

I C I R E O V E N N I T S

E T S R Y E D

NOTE: I Saw You/Cheers & Jeers is for adults 18 or older. The Inlander reserves the right to edit or reject any posting at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content.

Thur 1/18, Inlander

54 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

JEERS TO A SOUTH HILL GYM. A steam sauna that never works consistently is worthless. Quit showing it off to the new member prospects. It rarely works so just give up and get turn it into a storage closet. What a joke.

He met my son at the AMC customer service desk and got him a seat to see Star Wars.

SOUND OFF

For Tickets Call 509.535.PUCK

complaints every time we turn around.

I’m so sick of it! Just shut the hell up already and GET OVER IT! -thankyou and have a nice day(suck it) ;) Not so steamy.

EVENTS | CALENDAR

BENEFIT

DEER PARK LIBRARY BOOK SALE Proceeds from the book sale supports various library programs, activities, and services. Jan. 20, 9 am-4 pm. Deer Park Library, 208 Forest St. scld.org SPOKANE VALLEY LIBRARY BOOK SALE Proceeds from the book sale supports various library programs, activities, and services. Presale ($10) Jan. 19, 3-5 pm. Jan. 20, 9 am-3 pm. Spokane Valley Library, 12004 E. Main. (893-8400) JANUARY OPEN HOUSE Come play games, make crafts, meet our animals, and learn how our birds of prey (and other birds) find food and stay warm in the winter. Jan. 20, 10 am-2 pm. $5 suggested donation. West Valley Outdoor Learning Center, 8706 E. Upriver Drive. facebook.com/westvalleyoutdoorlearningcenter/ (340-1028) POP UP SALE! Project Beauty Share is offering shampoo, conditioner, hair products, lotions, and makeup of all kinds at significant savings. Proceeds benefit the nonrprofit serving women and their families overcoming abuse, addiction, homelessness and poverty. Jan. 25 from 3-6 pm and Jan. 27 from 9 am-noon.

Project Beauty Share, 2718 E. Sprague Ave. projectbeautyshare.org FAMILY PROMISE OF N. IDAHO’S NW FEST & SALMON FEAST The 11th annual dinner/auction begins at 5:30 pm with silent auction items, followed by a catered dinner of salmon, chicken, sides and more. Jan. 26, 5:30-9 pm. $50. Coeur d’Alene Eagles, 209 Sherman. familypromiseni.org (208-777-4190)

COMEDY

2.0PEN MIC Local comedy night hosted

by Ken McComb. Thursdays, from 8-10 pm. Free. The District Bar, 916 W. First Ave. facebook.com/districtbarspokane/ CHRIS FRANJOLA This writer/comedian began his comedy career on Long Island.

Chris was a writer and a regular performer on E!’s hit show “Chelsea Lately” for 8 years. Most recently, you can see Chris Franjola the hit Netflix series “Glow”. Jan. 18-19 at 8 pm; Jan. 20 at 7 and 9:30 pm. $8-$22. Spokane Comedy Club, 315 W. Sprague. spokanecomedyclub.com CHOOSE TO LOSE Audience members compete in this wacky all-improvised game show, in which winning is losing!

Fridays at 8 pm through Feb. 9. Rated for general audiences. $7. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland. bluedoortheatre.com STAND-UP COMEDY Live comedy featuring established and up-and-coming local comedians. Fridays at 8 pm. No cover. Red Dragon Chinese, 1406 W. Third Ave. reddragondelivery.com SAFARI The BDT’s fast-paced, shortform improv show in a game-based format relies on audience suggestions to fuel each scene. Ages 16+. Saturdays from 8-9:30 pm. $7. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland. bluedoortheatre.com THE SOCIAL HOUR COMEDY SHOWCASE Featuring comics from the Northwest and beyond, and hosted by Deece Casillas. Sundays, from 8-9:30 pm. Free.

The Ridler Piano Bar, 718 W. Riverside Ave. socialhourpod.com (822-7938) OPEN MIC A free open mic night every Wednesday, starting at 8 pm. Doors open

at 7 pm. Free. Spokane Comedy Club, 315 W. Sprague. spokanecomedyclub.com JAMIE KENNEDY The actor/comedian is known for his work in Wes Craven’s “Scream,” “Enemy of the State,” “Three Kings,” and his show “The Jamie Kennedy Experiment,” which launched the film “Malibu’s Most Wanted.” Jan. 25-26 at 8 pm; Jan. 27 at 7 and 9:30 pm. $15-$28.

Spokane Comedy Club, 315 W. Sprague.

(318-9998)

COMMUNITY

CITYWIDE EMPOWER HOUR YOGA An hour of yoga and a chance to connect with a network of local, like-minded women. This monthly event is held at new locations in and around downtown.

Bring a yoga mat and a couple business cards to enter giveaways from local businesses. Jan. 18, 12-1 pm. Free. The McGinnity Room, 116 W. Pacific. (981-5886) LILAC CITY LIVE! The second installment of the local, “late night” talk show featuring local Spokane talent. Hosted by Ryan Dean Tucker with guests Shawn Vestal, Newman and Shelby Anne Allison and Casey Strain. Proceeds from a cash bar benefit the SPL Foundation. Jan. 18, 7 pm.

Free. Downtown Spokane Library, 906 W. Main. bit.ly/2qKC7mV (444-5336) THURSDAY EVENING SWING Weekly swing dance classes and open community dances; Thursdays from 6:45-10 pm.

Includes progressive (6:45 pm) and dropin (7:45 pm) lessons, followed by open dancing (8:30-10 pm. $8-$50. Woman’s Club of Spokane, 1428 W. Ninth. strictlyswingspokane.com (509-838-5667)

TITANIC: THE ARTIFACT EXHIBITION This blockbuster exhibit takes visitors on a journey back in time to experience the legend of Titanic through more than 120 artifacts recovered from the ocean floor.

Through May 20; Tue-Sun 10 am-5 pm (Thu until 8 pm). $18/adults, $16/seniors, $10/ages 6-17, $13/college students w/ ID. Northwest Museum of Arts & Culture, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org SPARK SALON The second annual benefit for Spark Central brings video game developers Rand and Robyn Miller of Cyan Worlds back to their hometown for a sit down with author Jess Walter. Jan. 19, 6:30-9 pm. [SOLD OUT] spark-central.org BUILD YOUR CAT A CASTLE Come use the library’s supplies to build your cat or other small pet a fun castle. Families and adults welcome. Jan. 20, 3 pm. Free. Shadle Library, 2111 W. Wellesley. (444-5390) DICE THRONE CONVENTION The creators of the locally-made board game host the first ever convention, with tournament prizing, live art with co-creator Manny Trembley, swag bags, raffles, free play and hands-on play with new heroes.

Jan. 20, 10 am-8 pm. $30. Red Lion Hotel River Inn, 700 North Division Street. bit. ly/2CUZhwg NORTH IDAHO WOMEN’S MARCH II A non-partisan event to harness the power of women in the community to create positive social change, and to encourage women to run for political office. Also includes opportunities for women and men to take action on issues of education, health care and human rights. Jan. 20, 12-3 pm. Free. Sandpoint Middle School, 310 S. Division. (208-263-5525)

ICE CREAM SOCIAL & CHILI FEED The community event features chili recipes from Texas to New Jersey, along with lentil soup, baked potatoes and moose tracks ice cream. Jan. 21, 11:30 am-1 pm.

Free. Messiah Lutheran Church, 4202 N Belt. (327-4446) WOMEN’S PERSISTENCE MARCH & RALLY Marchers gather at noon at the Red Wagon Meadow to Rally before the march to the Convention Center for community vendors, music, speakers, door prizes, charity and civic organizations until 5 pm. Jan. 21. Riverfront Park, 705 N. Howard. bit.ly/2mKMO4d THE PROFANITY PEAK PACK: SET UP & SOLD OUT The Lands Council, Center for Justice, KYRS Radio, and Gonzaga Environmental Law present a screening of the film which provides a detailed account of the decimation one of Washington’s recovering wolf packs. Jan. 23, 6:30 pm. Free and open to the public.

Gonzaga School of Law, 721 N. Cincinnati. bit.ly/2rfyl54 RHETORIC IN THE RING IV: KIDS VS COURTS An event to raise funds and awareness for the Rogers High School Speech and Debate Club, featuring Spokane District Court judges stepping into the ring to take on two Rogers HS debaters. Jan. 23, 5:30-6:30 pm. Free; donations accepted. Howard Street Gym, 165 S. Howard. (206-790-6561) WEDNESDAY NIGHT CONTRA Spokane Folklore Society’s weekly dance, with the River City Ramblers playing and caller Susan Dankovich. Beginner workshop at 7:15 pm. Jan. 24, 7:30-9:30 pm. $5/$7.

Woman’s Club of Spokane, 1428 W. Ninth. (598-9111)

2018 AAA CRUISE SHOW Hotel RL by Red Lion Spokane at the Park 303 W. North River Drive Saturday, February 3 8:30 AM – 2:30 PM

· Day-of-show specials with a $10 per person deposit* · Get up to $100 onboard spending credit* · Save 15% off all Travel Store gear, accessories and luggage at the cruise show*

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RSVP: (509) 358-7039 AAA.com/CruiseShows

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*$10 per person deposit required to secure Day of Show specials. Up to $100 per stateroom onboard spending credit (applies to first two full-fare passengers only) valid on select sailings only. $10 per person deposit is nonrefundable. Travel Store 15% off savings valid day of show only.

Offers valid day of show only. AAA does not charge service fees on the purchase of cruises and tours. Other service fees may apply for items such as airline tickets, passports, fees imposed by other companies or gov’t entities, etc. AAA Member Rewards Visa® available to everyone.

Restrictions and limitations apply per product. Ask AAA for details. Agency #178-018-521 #2511 12/17

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JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 55

Wesley Tuttle waters a pot plant at Yield Farms. YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

PRODUCTION

Green Thumbs The basics of growing cannabis

BY TUCK CLARRY

N

ot often when we spark up do we wonder how exactly our bud was grown. With the ever-evolving industry of post-prohibition pot, commercial farming allows for a multitude of ways for cannabis plants to be grown.

There are three standard bases for farmers: soil, cocoa and hydroponic systems. If a grower is concerned about maintaining an organic operation, they will likely stick to soil — as will beginners and many high-volume farms due to its forgiving nature.

“It already has microbes that help the growing process and you don’t have to worry about the pH levels of the plant as much,” Lilac City Gardens grower CJ Palmer said.

“Soil has the capability to buffer the roots when dealing with acidity or certain environments, so you don’t have to be as worried about things like the temperature of the root zone.”

You can also add nutrients to the soil if needed throughout the process. But if you’re doing a living soil or compost, the soil is already equipped with precious minerals and microbes for the soil’s entire life cycle.

Cocoa is a base for beginner and intermediate growers.

Its light or airy density allows for more air to the roots. You have more control of what happens in terms of the plant’s intake throughout its growth. Unlike soil, you have to pay more attention and actively maintain the pH level.

“A too-high pH level will burn the plant and stunt the growth, ruining the disbursement of nutrients,” Palmer said.

Hydroponics provide more control of the growth, but are for more experienced growers due to the vulnerability of the plant itself. It’s incredibly porous so there is a greater amount of air flow.

“It’s incredibly easy to screw up because of the lack of buffer for the roots of the plant,” Palmer said. “Your measurements of pH and parts per million (ppm) need to be precise.”

Palmer prefers hydroponics, using a base called rockwool, which kind of looks like the material used for insulation.

“It is great at retaining water while still helping the roots receive more oxygen,” Palmer said.

The difficulty with high volume hydroponics for smaller farms is the cost of nutrients that growers would have to add to the base. n

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EVENTS | CALENDAR

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7TH ANNUAL HOMELESS CONNECT This annual free event offers a wide variety of services under one roof for anyone experiencing homelessness or at risk of becoming homeless, including legal consultations, medical checkups, and referrals to community services. Jan. 25, 10 am-2 pm. Free.

The Salvation Army Spokane, 222 E. Indiana. salvationarmyspokane.org TALE OF TWO RIVERS An evening of conversation on rivers and dams, salmon and orcas, people and politics, with Lynda Mapes and Rocky Barker.

Discussion moderated by Eli Francovich of the Spokesman-Review. Jan. 25, 6-9 pm. Free. Washington Cracker Co, 304 W. Pacific. wildsalmon.org A WALK THROUGH POVERTY This new documentary examines the complex nature of poverty in our region through and an immersive experience that includes portrait sketches of some of the individuals who share their experience with the audience about poverty. Jan. 25, 4:30 pm. Free. Downtown Spokane Library, 906 W. Main Ave. spokanelibrary.org

FILM

YOUR TEEN ASKS WHY

THREE BILLBOARDS OUTSIDE EBBING, MISSOURI A darkly comic drama from Academy Award-winner Martin McDonagh. Rated R. Showing Jan. 1921, times vary. $3-$7. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org GREEN SCREEN FOR VIDEO Get tips and tricks on how to evenly light your green screen with LED lights. Also learn how to upload your footage and swap out the background. Jan. 20, 11 am-noon. Free. Spokane Valley Library, 12004 E. Main. (893-8400) STAGE TO SCREEN: FOLLIES Stephen Sondheim’s Follies is one of his most hauntingly beautiful creations, telling the story of a group of showgirls and their backstage beaus, meeting 30 years after their glamorous glory days in a New York musical revue. Jan. 21, 2-5 pm. $7-$13. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague. friendsofthebing.org PALOUSE CULT FILM REVIVAL: THE ROOM Doors open at 8:30 for raffles, a bar, and other surprises. Ages 21+. Jan. 22, 9 pm. $5. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org MARK FELT: THE MAN WHO BROUGHT DOWN THE WHITE HOUSE The film offers insights into The Washington Post’s coverage of Watergate, and stars Liam Neeson as Felt, a University of Idaho graduate who rose to become deputy associate director of the FBI under J. Edgar Hoover. Jan. 23, 7 pm. Free. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org (208-882-4127)

FOOD IS LEGAL FOR YOU, BUT NOT HIM. AND YOU SAY? Now that marijuana is legal for those 21 and over, it’s more important than ever to talk with your kids.

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GOURMET S’MORES Eva from Just American Desserts teaches how to make homemade graham crackers and marshmallows. Jan. 18, 6-8 pm. $32. My Fresh Basket, 1030 W. Summit Pkwy. (558-2100) HACK YOUR COFFEE Find out how to boost your coffee with energizing and health-boosting ingredients. Jan. 19, 12-2 pm. Free. Natural Grocers, 4603 N. Division. naturalgrocers.com VINO WINE TASTING Friday’s (Jan. 19) event features Christopher Michael NW Wines, from 3-6:30 pm. Saturday’s tasting (Jan. 20) showcases Watermill Win-

ery of Walla Walla, from 2-4:30. Vino!, 222 S. Washington. vinowine.com WINE TASTING: CHILE & ARGENTINA Come taste six wines from these rival nations and walk away with a few of your favorites. Jan. 19. $15. Petunias Marketplace, 2010 N. Madison St. petuniasmarket.com (509-328-4257) DAFT BADGER 3RD ANNIVERSARY Celebrate the brewery’s third birthday with live music by the Blake Braley Band (12-3:30 pm) and Shakewell (5:30-8 pm), food specials and beer. Jan. 20, 12-8 pm. Daft Badger Brewing, 1710 N. 2nd. facebook.com/daftbadgerbrewing ON-THE-GO HEALTHY BREAKFASTS Join Chef Taryn Avena for this class teaching five easy breakfast recipes to keep you fueled. Jan. 20, 2-4 pm. $20. My Fresh Basket, 1030 W. Summit Pkwy. (558-2100) VEGAN SAUCES FROM SCRATCH Join Raquel Kaelin from Tender Loving Cuisine for a two-hour class teaching how to make wholesome vegan sauces.

Jan. 23, 6-8 pm. $25. My Fresh Basket, 1030 W. Summit Pkwy. (558-2100) ROBERT BURNS WHISKY DINNER Celebrated on the eve or the day of the famous Scottish poet’s birth (Jan. 25), this tradition is a celebration of Scotch whisky and Scottish food. Jan. 24, 6:30 pm. $40/person. 315 Martinis & Tapas, 315 Wallace Ave. (208-667-9660) BARRISTER WINE DINNER A fourcourse dinner at Sante’s Butcher Bar, featuring pairings from Barrister Winery. Jan. 25, 6:30 pm. $65/person.

Santé Restaurant & Charcuterie, 404 W. Main. santespokane.com (315-4613) HARVEST PLUM ALE RELEASE + BENEFIT Spokane Edible Tree Project and Bellwether Brewing Co. celebrate the release of their ale brewed with gleaned golden plums. $1 from each pour benefits Spokane Edible Tree Project’s food recovery program. Jan. 25. Free. Bellwether Brewing, 2019 N. Monroe. spokaneedibletreeproject.org PINTS FOR COMMUNITY For the month of January, Community Pint is supporting the West Central Community, with a portion of all No-Li Brewhouse pint sales benefiting its mission and efforts. Jan. 25, 6 pm. Community Pint, 120 E. Sprague. bit.ly/2mOVwPd

MUSIC

BYU VOCAL POINT WITH GU BIG BING THEORY Vocal Point captivates audiences with high-energy performances and elaborate music videos.

Jan. 19, 7:30 pm. $12-$36. INB Performing Arts Center, 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. inbpac.com CDA SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA This concert conducted by Artistic Director Candidate Pierre-Alain Chevalier features works by Brahms and Tchaikovsky and a side-by-side play-along with the North Idaho Youth Symphony and winners of the Youth Melody Contest. Jan. 19 at 7:30 pm and Jan. 20 at 2 pm. $10-$20. Kroc Center, 1765 W. Golf Course Rd. cdasymphony.org THE M SHOW Take a walk on the wild side with Spokane Symphony concertmaster Mateusz Wolski in this witty and unorthodox show featuring an ensemble of musicians performing familiar works, along with comedy and video. Jan. 19 and 20 at 8 pm. $36$54. Washington Cracker Co. 304 W. Pacific. spokanesymphony.org

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 59

RELATIONSHIPS

Advice Goddess GUESS PAINS

I got dumped four months ago, and I’m still not sure what happened. All of my boyfriend’s explanations seemed vague, and the breakup really came out of nowhere. I don’t want to contact him. How do I sort this out so I can move on? —Desperately Seeking Closure Science has yet to figure out a number of life’s mysteries — questions like: “What came before the big bang?” “Why is there more matter than antimatter?”

AMY ALKON and “If we’re such an advanced civilization, what’s with short-sleeved leather jackets?”

Freak breakups — unexpected, inexplicable endings to relationships — are really tough because our mind doesn’t do well with unfinished business. It ends up bugging us to get “closure” — and by “bugging,” I mean like some maniacal game show host in hell, shouting at us for all eternity, “Answer the question! Answer the question!”

This psychological spin cycle we go into is called “the Zeigarnik effect,” after Russian psychologist and psychiatrist Bluma Zeigarnik. In the 1920s, Zeigarnik observed that waiters at a busy Vienna restaurant were pretty remarkable at remembering food orders they had taken but had yet to deliver. However, once they’d brought the food to the patrons, they had little memory of what the orders were.

Zeigarnik’s research (and subsequent modern research) suggests that the mind remains in a “state of tension” until we complete whatever we’ve left incomplete — finishing the task we’ve started or finally answering some nagging question.

This might seem like bad news for you, considering the mystery you’ve got on your hands. However, you can make use of psychologist Daniel Kahneman’s research. He explains that our brains are “expensive” to run; basically, it takes a ton of energy to keep the lights on up there. So our mind is programmed to take mental shortcuts whenever it can — believing stuff that has even a veneer of plausibility.

As for how this plays out, essentially, your mind assumes that you’re smart — that you don’t believe things for no reason. The upshot of this for you is that you can probably just decide on a story — your best guess for why your now-ex-boyfriend bolted — and write yourself an ending that gets you off the mental hamster wheel.

Should any of those old intrusive thoughts drop by for a visit, review the ending you’ve written, and then distract yourself until they go away — like by reciting the ABCs backward or by pondering the mysteries of human existence, such as vajazzling (gluing Swarovski crystals to one’s labia and thereabouts). No, ladies, your vagina will not be more fun if it’s wearing earrings.

MOMMY DREARIEST

I’m a woman in my early 40s, married for 12 years. I gave up my career as a dancer to be a mom. I can afford not to work, as my husband makes great money.

However, my kids are now 12 and 13 and don’t need me like they did when they were little. I feel as if I don’t have any purpose in my life, and it’s getting me down.

I can’t go back to dancing now. What do I do? —At Loose Ends Sure, your kids still need you, but mainly to drive them places and then (ideally) be kidnapped by Mexican drug cartel members, only to be miraculously released just when they need a ride home.

In fact, in these modern times, it can feel like much of your job as a mother could be done by a stern-voiced Uber driver. This is a problem. As social psychologist Todd Kashdan explains, “Years of research on the psychology of well-being have demonstrated that often human beings are happiest when they are engaged in” activities that bring meaning to their lives.

As I explain in “Good Manners for Nice People Who Sometimes Say F*ck,” living meaningfully means being bigger than just yourself. It means making a difference — making the world a better place because you were here. You do that by, for example, easing people’s suffering — and you don’t have to be a hospice nurse to do that.

You can do as my wonderfully cranky Venice neighbor @MrsAbbotKinney does as an adult literacy volunteer — teach people how to read. I always get a little mistyeyed when I see her tweets about taking one of the people she’s tutored to apply for their first library card.

Because doing kind acts for others appears to boost general life satisfaction, doing volunteer work should lead you to feel more fulfilled. This is especially important in a world where daily hardships involve things like struggling to remember your new PIN to get milk delivered from the online supermarket — as opposed to trekking through a snowstorm to the freezing-cold barn so you can get friendly with the down-there on a bitchy cow. n ©2018, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. • Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405 or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com)

60 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

EVENTS | CALENDAR INLAND NW BLUEGRASS MUSIC ASSOC. SHOWCASE Live bluegrass and related forms of acoustic music performed by local and regional bands.

Oct. 21-May 19; third Saturday of the month. $5-$7. Trent Elementary School, 3303 N. Pines. spokanebluegrass.org SPOKANE YOUTH SYMPHONY: HARMONY THAT INSPIRES Featuring the four orchestras of the Youth Symphony: the Orchestra, Philharmonic, Sinfonietta and Strings, performing classical works all inspired by the works of Shakespeare. Jan. 21, 4 pm. $12-$16.

Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague. (624-1200) CRESCENDO COMMUNITY CHORUS OPEN HOUSE An interactive open house offering all guest singers the chance to participate in rehearsals to see what it’s like to sing with Crescendo. Prep Choir (ages 7-11) from 5-6 pm; Concert Choir (ages 11-18, with unchanged voices) from 6-7:30 pm. Jan. 22, 5-7:30 pm. Free.

Knox Presbyterian, 806 W. Knox. crescendocommunitychorus.org BIG BING THEORY Inspired by Gonzaga alum Bing Crosby, BBT performs a variety of musical styles using only their voices. Jan. 23, 6 pm. Free. Downtown Spokane Library, 906 W. Main. spokanelibrary.org VIOLIN MASTER CLASS WITH MIRA WANG The public can observe a master class as guest violinist Mira Wang gives tips and advice to four local violin students. Jan. 26, 3-5 pm. Free. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague. spokanesymphony.org

SPORTS & OUTDOORS

GSL BASKETBALL RIVALRY GAMES The annual high school rivalry games with the Rubber Chicken (LC vs. Ferris) on Jan. 16; Groovy Shoes (Shadle vs. North Central) on Jan. 18 and Stinky Sneakers (U High vs. Central Valley) on Jan. 19. Games at 5 and 7:30 pm. $5$7. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon Ave. spokanearena.com (279-7000) INLAND NW RV SHOW The Northwest’s largest RV show is now in its 30th year, with more than 200,000 sq. ft. of RVs and accessories, including six dealers of trailers to motorhomes. Admission good all weekend; free parking.

Jan. 18 from 12-8 pm; Jan. 19-20 from 10 am-8 pm and Jan. 21 from 10 am-4 pm. $8. Spokane County Fair & Expo Center, 404 N. Havana. spokanervshow.com SPOKANE CHIEFS Regular season matches; vs. the Brandon Wheat Kings on Jan. 17 and the Tri-City Americans on Jan. 20 all matches start at 7:05 pm. $10-$35. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon Ave. spokanearena.com (279-7000)

THEATER

CACTUS FLOWER Falling in love is rarely simple, as illustrated in this quirky romantic farce. Through Jan. 28; ThuFri at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $14-$29.

Spokane Civic Theatre, 1020 N. Howard. spokanecivictheatre.com FALSETTOS Told through a series of rapid-fire vignettes, through the eyes of a Jewish father who, despite his conflicting attractions, is trying all methods of constructing a “tight knit family.”

Through Jan. 21; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $23-$25. Lake City Play-

house, 1320 E. Garden Ave. facebook. com/lakecityplayhouse NT LIVE: FOLLIES Stephen Sondheim’s legendary musical is staged for the first time at the National Theatre and broadcast live to cinemas. Jan. 18, 6:30 pm. $12. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org (208-882-4127) AT THE SWEET GUM BRIDGE This play is dedicated to the Choctaw nation chief Apushamatahahubih. Jan 12-28; Fri-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $20.

Stage Left Theater, 108 W. Third Ave. spokanestageleft.org (838-9727) THE SUNSHINE BOYS Toni Cummins directs this Neil Simon play about feuding Vaudeville comedians reunited by a TV special. Jan. 19-21; Fri-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $5. Ignite! Community Theatre, 10814 E. Broadway. (795-0004) WHO’S AFRAID OF VIRGINIA WOOLF? Winner of the 1963 Tony Award for Best Play, this intense and riveting drama exposes the gritty and visceral breakdown between George and Martha, an affluent middle-aged couple. Jan. 19-Feb. 11; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $27. Spokane Civic Theatre, 1020 N. Howard St. spokanecivictheatre.com MOTOWN THE MUSICAL The American dream story of Motown founder Berry Gordy’s journey from featherweight boxer to the heavyweight music mogul who launched the careers of Diana Ross, Michael Jackson, Smokey Robinson and many more. Jan. 24-28; WedSat at 7:30 pm, Sat at 2 pm and Sun at 1 and 6:30 pm. $39.50-$79.50. INB Performing Arts Center, 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. inbpac.com (509-279-7000) PEKING ACROBATS Accompanied by live musicians skillfully playing traditional Chinese instruments and hightech special effects, this all-family event features all the festive pageantry of a Chinese Carnival. Jan. 24, 8 pm. $21-$60. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague. (624-1200)

VISUAL ARTS

HAROLD BALAZS: I DID IT MY WAY A showcase of works by the late iconic artist, whose work populates churches, colleges, parks, and numerous public spaces around the country. Through Feb. 3; Tue-Sat from 9 am-6 pm. Opening reception Jan. 12 from 5-8 pm.

Panel discussion Jan. 13 at 1 pm. Free to view. Art Spirit Gallery, 415 Sherman Ave. theartspiritgallery.com THE MANY FACES OF DANCE An exhibit featuring 25 color photographs by C. Rod Bacon of dancers featured in the Great Performance seasons sponsored

by Festival Dance and Performing Arts over the past 28 years. Reception and artist talk on Fri, Jan. 19, from 5-7 pm.

Open through Jan. 26, Mon-Fri from 8 am-5 pm. Free. Third Street Gallery, City Hall, 206 E. Third. ci.moscow.id.us/art SONG OF SILENCE: EMBROIDERED TAPESTRIES OF KYRGYZ NOMADS EWU student Angeline Nesbit curated the gallery exhibit with Kyrgyzstan tapestries from Anne Marie Burk’s collection located in Spokane. Through Feb. 9; Mon-Fri from noon-5 pm. Artist reception Jan. 25. Free to the public.

EWU Downtown Student Gallery, 404 Second St. ewu.edu/downtowngallery BREATH STROKES WITH DEANNA CAMP Create your own artistic energy

on paper or canvas using gentle yoga practice and mediation as your foundation. Sessions on Jan. 20 and 27 and Feb. 10 and 24 from 10 am-2 pm. $40/ session. Spokane Art School, 811 W. Garland Ave. spokaneartschool.net MOLLY RICE Heavily influenced by nature, dreams, spirit and myth, Rice’s exhibit features a wide variety of media.

Jan. 20-March 31; open daily during library hours. Reception Jan. 20 from 5-7 pm. Free. Colfax Library, 102 S. Main St. whitco.lib.wa.us (509-397-4366) OPEN THE TRUNK A showcase by local fiber artist Nan Drye, who uses ecoprinting and wildcraft techniques to create wall hangings and wearable art. Jan. 20, 12-7 pm. New Moon Gallery, 1326 E. Sprague. newmoonartgallery.com RIVER RIDGE ASSN. OF FINE ARTS January meeting guest speakers include Amy Mickelson and Katie Patterson Larson from Art Salvage, Spokane’s first creative art reuse center. Jan. 24, 10 am-noon. Free. Spokane Art Supply, 1303 N. Monroe St. (509-327-6622)

WORDS

BLACK HISTORY MONTH: NIKKITA OLIVER The organizer, educator, attorney and community activist delivers the keynote address for U of I’s Martin Luther King Jr. celebration, titled “Transforming White Supremacist Structures Through Community Empowerment.”

Jan. 18, 5 pm. Free and open to the public. University of Idaho, 709 S Deakin St. uidaho.edu (208-885-7716) EWU VISITING WRITERS SERIES: JESSE GRAVES The MFA at EWU and Get Lit! Programs present a reading with Jesse Graves, an Associate Professor of English and the Poet-in-Residence at East Tennessee State. Jan. 19, 7:308:30 pm. Free. Auntie’s, 402 W. Main. getlitfestival.org DROP IN & WRITE Aspiring writers are invited to be a part of Spark’s supportive local writing community. Tuesdays from 4-5:30 pm. Free. Spark Central, 1214 W. Summit Pkwy. (279-0299) BROKEN MIC Spokane Poetry Slam’s longest-running, weekly open mic reading series, open to all readers and all-ages. Wednesdays at 6:30 pm. Free.

Neato Burrito, 827 W. First Ave. spokanepoetryslam.org (509-847-1234) POETRY WRITING WITH MARK ANDERSON Fairy tales and myths connect our personal stories to a shared, human story. In this workshop participants draw upon the strength of these collective stories to investigate our own personal histories. Ages 12+. Jan. 24 and 25 from 6-8 pm. Free. Emerge, 208 N. Fourth St. emergecda.org INLAND NORTHWEST MILESTONES This monthly series is presented by regional historian Robert Singletary, program and marketing director for the museum. Fourth Thursday of the month, at 7 pm, through May 26. Free.

Coeur d’Alene Public Library, 702 E. Front Ave. cdalibrary.org TITANIC: PEOPLE, PLACES, & THINGS In this first of four RMS Titanic-themed lectures, Premiere Exhibition’s VP of Collections Alexandra Klingelhofer discusses in-depth stories about passengers who were aboard the famous ocean-liner, which tragically sank on Jan. 25, 6:30 pm. $10. The MAC, 2316 W. First. (456-3931) n

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6. First name on “The View” 7. Sir in the Ruhr 8. Dutch cheese 9. “I ____ Song Go Out of My Heart” 10. ____-à-porter 11. “Rats!”

12. “Beats me” 13. Cream of the crop 21. Made dinner for 22. Kinda sorta 25. Acct. earnings

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43. “This Is How ____ It” (1995 #1 hit) 44. It’s 29% cream 45. Uneven trade which leaves a person with 13 less than they previously had?

51. D, in an emoticon 52. Billiard stick 53. 2005 Kelly Clarkson hit ... or this puzzle’s theme 61. Wee bit 62. Pioneering nurse Barton 63. Parts of college courses 65. Word after golden or old 66. “There’s ____ every crowd” 67. Diary part 68. Color in sunsets 69. Lollygags 70. Gave pills, e.g.

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19. French affirmative 20. Way in which lamebrains arrange themselves?

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JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 61

THIS WEEK

8V Triple Play

Coeur d ’Alene

Smile this winter at Silver Mountain

Outside the Box

Easy ways to experience the snow season

I

t won’t boost your cardio — unless you work up a sweat reeling them off your line — but ICE FISHING definitely burns calories. The area has several lakes to explore: Fernan, Hauser, Upper and Lower Twin, the topside of Hayden Lake, Avondale, and even some of Coeur d’Alene Lake’s many bays. Find out more at Idaho Fish and Game, idfg.idaho. gov/fish/ice-fishing, or stop by Fins & Feathers at 1816 Sherman or call 208-667-9304 for guidance.

If it’s solid enough to fish from, it’s probably good enough for ice skating, which you can also do at FRONTIER ICE ARENA. Bring your own skates and catch the peewee or bantam hockey action while you’re lacing up for public skate times at this popular rink run by Kootenai Youth Recreation Organization. Ask them about learn-to-skate parties, hockey, curling and even broomball.

Call 208-765-4423, frontiericearena. org.

62 INLANDER JANUARY 18, 2018

SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION

On Jan. 20, give cross-country skiing or snowshoeing a try for free during Winter Trails Day at SCHWEITZER MOUNTAIN. Pick up your free pass to access the nordic trails from Schweitzer’s Activity Center, Guest Services or the Ski and Ride Center. Guided interpretive (nature-based) hikes are scheduled throughout the day. Call 208-2553081 to reserve a space for hosted snowshoe hikes.

Holler your lungs out on the way down, then hang onto the tow rope for a ride back up and another go at snow tubing down SCHWEITZER MOUNTAIN’s Hermits Hollow, two, 300-foot-long lanes of fun. Call to book an hour-and-a-half block during the day ($10 to age 6, $15 ages 7+). Or fuel up on roasted marshmallows and pop on your glow necklace to go night tubing for two-and-a-half-hours ($15 to age 6, $20 ages 7+). Call 208-255-3081, schweitzer.com/play/hermits-hollow.

At SILVER MOUNTAIN, you’re burning rubber down any of four, fast-moving lanes for two whole hours during the day. Tickets $7 ages 2-3, $20 ages 4-17, $22 adults; Call 208-783-1111, silvermt.com/Winter/Snow-Tubing.

Are you more of a watcher than a doer? Thrill to epic tales of adventure from the comfort of your theater chair when Coeur d’Alene’s Kroc Center hosts the 2018 BANFF MOUNTAIN FILM FESTIVAL world tour, Jan. 26-28. Tickets $17, Call 208-6671865, kroccda.org/tickets.

CDA

Upcoming Events

Coeur d’Alene Symphony

12V Resort

JANUARY 19-20 Coeur d’Alene Symphony Orchestra’s Generations of Discovery concert will showcase North Idaho Youth Symphony musicians playing the works of Brahms and Tchaikovsky alongside orchestra members.

Tickets $10-20; Kroc Center; Jan. 19 at 7:30 pm; Jan. 20 at 2 pm.

Daft Badger Anniversary Party JANUARY 20 Daft Badger is celebrating its third birthday, and you’re all invited to the party. Stay warm when the fun spills into the outdoor courtyard by shaking it to live music by Blake Braley Band and Shakewell, or grab a hot Philly steak and huddle around the bonfire. Daft Badger Brewing, 1710 N. Second St.; Noon-3:30 pm Blake Braley Band; 5:30-8 pm Shakewell.

A Night of Wellness

JANUARY 23 Stay motivated to keep those New Year’s resolutions to eat better with an evening session on healthy blending presented

by The Well-ness Bar’s Ashlee Rowland, a certified nutrition consultant. $40 per person; The Culinary Stone; 5:30 pm; Call 208-277-4116 to reserve a spot.

For more events, things to do & places to stay, go to visitcda.org COEUR D’ALENE

SPONSORED BY THE COEUR D’ALENE CONVENTION & VISITORS BUREAU

JANUARY 18, 2018 INLANDER 63