COAST TO COAST: ROVING REPORTER BECOMES A RIDING ONE... Pages 20-22
WHO’S GOING TO BE THE NEXT BOND? WE ASK AI TO HELP Page 10
JOBS TO DO: WHY THE GARDENING ISN’T OVER JUST YET Page 28
MY DAD died from cancer nearly three years ago.
Losing my dad at a relatively young age (I had just turned 32) was something I wasn’t prepared for and it took an incredible toll on me.
It was the height of the pandemic and while everyone else was seemingly caught up with the traumas of Covid my dad’s deteriorating health ensured it was just a mere side issue for my brother and I.
My dad had esophageal cancer –one of the cruellest types – and it stopped him from eating anything substantial. He was quickly becoming a shadow of the strong man I had always known.
His death, before his cancer got any worse due to a scheduled suspension of treatment, was a blessing in many regards but sadly the restrictions meant only 30 people could attend his funeral.
I know there would have been five times more people there had they been allowed. Many others went through similar ordeals.
With the rest of the world focused on Covid the only support we received, outside of from the fantastic staff at Weston Park in Sheffield, was from Macmillan Cancer Support.
When my friend Matt, who works
for Macmillan, proposed a coast-tocoast cycling fundraiser for the charity, I had to get involved.
My dad had always been a biker but I am much more comfortable on a slower set of two wheels.
I cycle recreationally but knew this was going to be a proper challenge. As a group we are probably more Team Pie than Team Sky.
A route was planned, hotels were booked, people signed up and training stepped up a gear. All five of us completed the challenge and were very proud and pleased to do so.
I carried a picture of my dad on my bar bag for when I knew it was going to get really hard. On two occasions I had to look down to get the inspiration I needed to keep going. I was never going to let him down.
The route was mostly done on the Trans Pennine Trail (TPT), headquarted in Barnsley. It’s an incredible thing to have on our doorstep. It’s not perfect yet – but we are very fortunate to have it.
You can find a diary of the four-day mission on pages 20-22 inside this magazine. I hope you enjoy going over the four days of cycling a lot more than we did in the saddle...
Ashley Ball ashley.ball@barnsley-chronicle. co.uk
Page 6
Your entertainment guide for October...
Page 10
Pleased to meet you, Mr Bond... What an AI 007 would look like.
Page 14
How best to avoid the stresses of Christmas.
Page 24
We rank the best Halloween outfits and have a top ten countdown.
AS TEMPERATURES drop and it gets dark earlier, the RSPCA receive a large number of calls about the welfare of pets and wildlife.
The animal charity has released its top tips for keeping animals safe and warm during the winter.
Acorns, sycamore seeds and seedlings are poisonous to some farm animals, horses and pets. If you’re concerned about poisoning – don’t wait for symptoms to appear – consult your vet immediately.
If farm animals (cattle, sheep and goats), horses or dogs eat acorns during autumn or young oak leaves during spring, symptoms can appear within hours or after several days.
Dog owners
We understand it’s difficult to watch your dog’s every movement.
However, if owners think their dog will show interest in or eat acorns, they should find a safer place to take their dog.
Owners can also bring a toy or tasty treat so their pet can be easily distracted and recalled.
Farmers and horse owners
Farmers and horse owners should ensure food doesn’t get too short in fields with oak trees.
Animals are unlikely to gorge on anything dangerous if food is readily available. However, some horses develop a taste for acorns and oak leaves and will seek them out.
As well as acorns, sycamore seedlings and the ‘helicopter’ seeds can be fatal to
horses. Farmers and horse owners should monitor their animals.
They shouldn’t have access to poisonous trees, however, if any are eating acorns or sycamore seeds, move them to a different field or fence around the trees.
Beware – sycamore seeds and seedlings can spread over 100 metres away.
Keeping pets safe in the dark
Just as you should always wear reflective clothing to make yourself visible when walking near roads in the dark, don’t for-
get your pets.
Fit your dog and cat with a reflective collar – but make sure you only use a quick release collar for a cat.
Animals on the roads
As the nights grow longer, we see more injured wild animals coming into our care who’ve been involved in road traffic accidents. Accidents involving deer are especially common during the rut, which can occur from mid-July to December (depending on the species).
Take note of warning signs, drive with
extreme caution (especially early morning and evening) and report collisions with deer to the police.
Fireworks and bonfires during the festive season
If possible build bonfires close to the time of lighting and check them thoroughly for animals before lighting.
This can help save the lives of hedgehogs and other small animals.
Loud fireworks can be terrifying for animals, but a quick search online can give you tips to make it easier for them.
PANTOMIME season is almost upon us, but before the dames take the stage there’s plenty going on nearby.
For comedy lovers, award-winning John Robins is coming to The Civic for a night of stand-up on October 25, Manford’s Comedy Club are bringing four comedians to the Lamproom on October 13 and the legendary Sheffield-based comedy band the Everly Pregnant Brothers will be spending a night at the Imperial Music Venue in Mexborough on October 7.
Fans of Northern Soul should also be ready for an exciting weekend, as J36 continue with their monthly show at Birdwell on October 7 and the John Godber Company will host a play about youngsters rediscovering the genre in The Civic on October 6 and 7.
Families can expect a great time at The Civic with the I Spy With My Little Eye – The Party on October 22, which will feature sing-alongs and treasure hunts, or learn more about the prehistoric velociraptors as part of an interactive talk with life-like models on October 30.
Other events include Hallowbean, a fancy dress music festival at the Imperial on October 27, Barnsley Comic-Con on October 22 at the Metrodome and a performance by Radio Romantic at the Sun Inn on the same day.
STAINBOROUGH Rotary Club’s members raised thousands of pounds for three local charities earlier this month.
A total of £6,650 was raised for Barnsley Hospice, Barnsley Youth Choir and the LimbBo Foundation.
The first event held was the Worsbrough Charity Beer Festival, led by Ian Whittle. He said: “There we were nervous, hoping that customers would come through the door, we shouldn’t have worried, you did. Friday night was kicked off by musician Matt Mckenzie who entertained us in fine voice.Saturday’s entertainers were Harry Walker, Lee Bailey and Emilia Hill who were all great.
“A special mention must go to Stancil Brewery who have sourced all the beers and have been very generous in supporting the beer festival.
“I must say the beer was ‘pulled’ very professionally by the Hospice volunteers and rotarians – we had a great laugh.
“All this couldn’t have happened without the support from Worsbrough Sports and Development Association who pulled out all the stops to make it a fun weekend.”
A total of £3,400 was raised for the charities. The second event was a Ladies Lunch, attended by 175 women, at the Holiday Inn at Dodworth.
Entertainment was provided by the immensely talented Hannah Rowe, a senior soloist with the Youth Choir and also 14-year-old Lilie Banton. A fashion parade of beautiful outfits provided by Barnsley Hospice hub also took place. A total of £3,250 was raised from this event.
Club president Derek Housley said: “A special thanks to Barbara Lee who led on the ladies lunch and to Ian Whittle who led on the beer festival, with monies raised supporting many charities and good causes.
“This comes on top of a further £1,135 which was recently raised at a coffee morning for Brian Tumour Research.
“There is much more Stainborough Rotary would like to do in helping our communities, so if you are interested in helping us with our projects, please do get in touch. We are open to all like-minded women and men.”
FUNDRAISER: The Beer Festival.
The Bedroom Centre is Yorkshire’s longest serving family run luxury beds specialists, proudly established since 1978.
Renowned for their luxury beds at affordable prices.
TRUSTED BY ALL
3rd generation family-run business trusted for over four decades serving the local community and beyond.
GUARANTEED
All our products are built to the highest standards and designed to go above and beyond all regulatory requirements.
UK DELIVERY
No matter where you are in the country, we offer delivery.
VISIT THE SHOWROOM
Unit 3, Dearne Valley Parkway, Hoyland, S74 0SB
1 MINUTE FROM M1 MOTORWAY!
Here you will find their full range of bespoke luxury beds & mattresses
The Bedroom Centre
01226 288289
JUST WHO is going to be the next James Bond? It’s the question on every film buff’s lips...
Through artificial intelligence we can get a glimpse of EXACTLY what hardened casting agent Barbara Brocolli is after.
He would be British, under 40, and over five foot ten.
Inputting all the requirements into Hearts Land gives you this image and it bears more than a passing resemblance to Aaron Taylor-Johnson, one of the front runners for the role Daniel Craig has given up.
Other favourites with the bookies include Damson Idris, Rege-Jean Paige, Henry Cavell and James Norton.
A Hearts Land spokesperson said: “One of the most exciting applications of AI at the moment is to imagine what producers and casting directors are imagining or looking for when casting popular characters – particularly for shows where it’s really all up in the air.
“It’s fascinating that AI is able to create a realistic image of someone based on such little information – and it’s particularly exciting that this bears such a close resemblance to frontrunner Aaron Taylor-Johnson.
“It’ll be amazing if he actually lands the role now!”
Former Bonds:
Sean Connery (1962-67, 1971, 1983)
David Niven (1967)
George Lazenby (1969)
Roger Moore (1973-1985)
Timothy Dalton (1987-1989)
Pierce Brosnan (1995-2002)
Daniel Craig (2006-2021)
Advertiser’s announcement
ORIGINALLY opening its first practice in Hillsborough on March 1 2005, Premier Eyecare’s practices have undergone major refurbishment, relocation and further investment over recent years.
The team in Hoyland welcome you to visit the new practice for an informal browse and introduction. Premier Eyecare is the place to find all your favourite brands, including Rayban, Oakley, Boss and Versace, to Italian handmade Titanium Black fin frames that are painted with the paint used on Ferrari.
As an independent business, Premier Eyecare has complete freedom to hand-pick the very best available frames and lenses, as well as being able to tailor their products and services to meet your specific needs.
Always striving to be the forefront of the latest techniques and technology in the optical industry. Premier Eyecare fit Orthokeratology contact lenses, which are clinically proven to reduce the progression of myopia (short-sightedness) in children.
Simply wear the lenses as you sleep and have clear sight throughout the day without the need for glasses or contact lenses.
Massively increasing confidence and giving your child that added benefit of freedom from spectacles, these lenses are fantastic for those environments where spectacles can be a hindrance for adults too.
Other myopia-control options are now available in MiYOSMART and Stellest spectacle lenses too for those children not suitable or wanting to try contact lenses.
Call the team to find out more.
When it comes to comfortable and comprehensive eye examinations, all Premier Eyecare practices use a revolutionary iCare ’no puff of air’ glaucoma check. For that full professional, yet friendly and caring service contact Premier Eyecare now as they are registering new patients as well.
With many people enduring the cost-ofliving crisis – Christmas this year might be something to dread rather than look forward to.
There are ways to avoid any tinsel trauma and the key is to get shopping done earlier.
Below is a guide on how to plan ahead and hopefully make Christmas a time to enjoy.
n Set a budget and stick to it. This is the most important tip for any kind of shopping, but it’s especially important for Christmas shopping when you’re likely to be spending more money than usual. Once you know how much you can afford to spend, you can start to plan your shopping accordingly.
n Make a list of who you need to buy for. This will help you stay organised and avoid forgetting anyone.
Once you have a list, you can start to think about what kind of gifts each person would like.
n Start shopping early. The earlier you start shopping, the more likely you are to find good deals and avoid the crowds. Many stores start offering discounts in September and October, so don’t wait until December to start shopping.
n Shop around. Don’t just go to the first store you see. Compare prices from different stores to get the best deal. You can also use online price comparison tools to help you find the best prices.
n Take advantage of sales and promotions. Many stores offer sales and promotions throughout the holiday season,
so be sure to keep an eye out for them. You can also sign up for email alerts from your favourite stores so you’ll be notified of upcoming sales.
n Be flexible with your gift ideas. If you can’t find the perfect gift for someone, don’t be afraid to get creative. There are many ways to show someone you care without spending a lot of money. For example, you could make a gift, donate to their favourite charity in their name, or give them an experience, such as tickets to a concert or sporting event.
n Don’t forget the wrapping paper and cards. The wrapping paper and cards can be just as important as the gift itself.
Choose something that reflects the recipient’s personality and style.
n Start wrapping your gifts early. This will save you time and stress on Christmas Eve. You can even get the kids involved in the wrapping process.
n Don’t forget to post your gifts early. If you’re sending gifts to friends or family who live far away, be sure to post them early so they arrive on time.
Enjoy the process! Christmas shopping doesn’t have to be stressful. If you plan ahead and stay organised, you can enjoy the experience and find the perfect gifts for everyone on your list.
n Shop at independent retailers.
Independent retailers often have more unique and personalised gifts than big chain stores. They may also be more willing to negotiate on prices.
n Don’t forget about online shopping. Online shopping can be a great way to find hard-to-find gifts and get the best deals. However, be sure to factor in shipping costs when making your purchase.
n Consider buying gifts from sustainable and ethical brands. There are many great sustainable and ethical brands in the UK that offer Christmas gifts. This is a great way to support businesses that are making a positive impact on the world.
An
Open Monday to Saturday, 9.30am – 4.30pm
We stock all the latest titles, with a wide-range of fiction and non-fiction. If you can’t find it in store, we can order it for you! Plus bookmarks, notebooks, greeting cards, with more jigsaws and other products arriving every week.
September and October are the busiest months for new titles. We will have a new brochure in store soon! Plenty of new fiction, children’s books and biographies in the run-up to Xmas.
We have lots of signed books arriving including Richard Osman, Stuart Broad, Claire North, and John Grisham.
More to find in store! Current signed and exclusive editions include Joanne Harris, Michelle Rawlins, Ann Cleeves, and Dr. Amir Khan’s first novel, How (Not) to Have an Arranged Marriage.
For those unable to visit we offer a mail order service, with home delivery for the local area.
You can also visit our dedicated Children’s area, a space to discover worlds of magic and wonder. Lots of books, plus Orchard Toys, Gibson Games and other gifts.
As well as writers such as Milly Johnson and Ian McMillan, we have a range of local interest books. We have a growing selection from Pen and Sword on local heritage, landscape and history, and stock the Memories of Barnsley quarterly magazine.
To order and pre-order books mentioned or any others, for store collection or delivery, please contact us!
Barnsley Interchange Stands 23 / 24
Email: sales@globeholidays.co.uk
facebook.com/globecoaches @globehols
For enquiries, please contact: 01226 299900
Barnsley Travel Centre,60 Eldon Street, Barnsley S70 2JL
Email: sales@globeholidays.co.uk
@globehols
For enquiries, please contact: 01226 299900
Barnsley Travel Centre,60 Eldon Street, Barnsley S70 2JL
Wath-upon-Dearne – bus stop on Church Street
Brampton – outside The Bulls Head
Wombwell – Summer Lane car park
Platts Common – Sammys (former WMC)
Hoyland Southgate – bus stop / behind Town Hall
Hoyland Common – opposite the Co-op
Birdwell – Working Mens Club
Worsborough – Ship Inn Vernon Road
Barnsley Interchange Stands 23 / 24
January
Sat 6thYork £16.00
Sat 6thYork McArthur Glen Designer Outlet £16.00
Sat 13thChester £16.00
Sat 13thCheshire Oaks Designer Outlet £16.00
Wed 17thBury Market £15.00
Fri 19thSkipton Market & Harrogate £16.00
Sat 20thLiverpool £16.00
Sat 27thBirmingham / World’s Biggest Primark £20.00
February
Thurs 8thHalifax Piece Hall & Hebden Bridge £17.00
Sat 10thManchester Chinese New Year £16.00
Sat 10th Whitby Steampunk Weekend £18.00
Sun 11thBlackpool £16.00
Mon 12thBakewell Market & Buxton £17.00
Book online at: www.dayoutbycoach.co.uk
Wed 14thChester £16.00
Wed 14thChester Zoo £16.00
Thurs 15thSkegness £18.00
Fri 16thCadbury World £35.00*
Sat 17thYork Viking Festival £16.00
Sun 18thScarborough £16.00
Wed 21stBury Market £15.00
Sun 25thBlackpool £16.00
March
Sat 30thBeamish Sat 30thDurham Sat 30th Cleethorpes Sun 31stSkirlington April
1stBlackpool
Tues 2ndSkegness Wed 3rdBury Thurs 4thLiverpool Fri 5thWhitby Sat 6thKnowsley Sun 7thBridlington
Sat 13thBeamish
Sat 13thDurham
Sun 14thStratford-upon-Avon
Mon 15thScarborough
Thurs 18thYork
Thurs 18thYork
Sat 20thBlackpool
Mon 22ndBakewell
Wed 24thBury
Fri 26thHarrogate
Sat 27thWhitby
Sun 28thWhitby
Book online at: www.dayoutbycoach.co.uk
Sat 2ndScarborough £16.00
Thurs 7thCleveland Coastal Tour £20.00
Sat 9thBridlington £16.00
Sun 10thSkegness –Mother’s Day £16.00
Tues 12thSettle & Hawes £16.00
Fri 15thWhitby via Helmsley £18.00
Sun 17thNorthumberland Coastal Tour & Holy Island£20.00
Tues 19thFleetwood Market & Cleveleys £16.00
Wed 20thNorthallerton Market (early return) £15.00
Sat 23rdBlackpool £16.00
Sun 24thScarborough £16.00
Mon 25thLlandudno £18.00
Tues 26thSouthport £16.00
Wed 27thBury Market £15.00
Fri 29thWhitby via Goathland (Bank Holiday) £20.00
Tues 30thSettle
*Includes admission
PEOPLE are getting craftier with their creations and it is important to move with the seasons.
There are many materials readily available in the autumnal season.
Here are our tips on how to make an Autumn wreath.
Materials:
A wire wreath form
Green foliage, such as ivy, boxwood, or fir
Fall leaves, such as maple, oak, or sycamore
Other autumn decorations, such as pumpkins, acorns, or pinecones
Hot glue gun and glue sticks
Twine or ribbon for hanging
Instructions:
Wrap the wire wreath form with twine or ribbon to secure it.
Cut the green foliage into six-inch lengths.
Gather the foliage into small bunches and tie them together with wire.
Attach the foliage bunches to the wreath form, starting at the bottom and working your way up.
Add the fall leaves to the wreath, overlapping them slightly.
Add other autumn decorations, such as pumpkins, acorns, or pinecones.
Use the hot glue gun to secure all of the decorations in place.
Hang the wreath on your door or wall.
Here are some additional tips for making an autumn wreath:
Choose a variety of fall leaves to create a colourful wreath.
Mix and match different types of foliage
to add interest.
Add a touch of rustic charm by using natural materials, such as burlap or twine.
Don’t be afraid to get creative with your decorations.
Here are some ideas for other materials you can use to make an autumn wreath:
Dried flowers
Cornhusks
Wheat stalks
Gourds
Apples
Cinnamon sticks
Pine cones
Berries
No matter what materials you choose, an autumn wreath is a beautiful way to celebrate the changing seasons. So get creative and have fun making your own.
Here are some additional things to keep in mind when making an autumn wreath:
The size of the wreath will depend on where you plan to hang it. For a door wreath, you will need a wreath form that is about 18 inches in diameter. For a wall wreath, you can use a smaller form.
The type of wire wreath form you choose will also affect the look of your wreath. A wire form with a spiral design will create a more organic look, while a wire form with a smooth surface will give your wreath a more formal appearance.
When choosing foliage, look for leaves that are still green and healthy. Avoid leaves that are wilted or brown.
If you are using dried leaves, make sure
they are not brittle. Brittle leaves will break easily and make your wreath look messy.
When attaching the foliage to the wreath form, use enough glue to make sure it is secure.
However, be careful not to use too much glue, as this can make your wreath look bulky.
Once you are finished making your wreath, hang it in a place where it will be seen and appreciated.
September 7
CONSIDERING William The Conqueror allegedly fell over on the beach before becoming the King of England following the Battle of Hastings... it was reassuring that we took a wrong turn within about ten minutes of setting off from the seafront at Southport.
We soon got on the right track and were heading south towards Liverpool and leaving the sea behind.
Within the first few hours we saw two of the city’s leading sporting venues in Aintree Racecourse, the home of the Grand National, and Anfield. Goodison Park is slightly out of view from the Trans Pennine Trail (TPT), our chosen artery through the country as our group of five bidded to cycle from the Irish Sea to the North Sea in four days.
We have a mixture of bicycles between us but I wanted to use my hybrid as a large portion of the trail is tarmacked... unfortunately not on today’s ride and my left wrist was bearing the brunt of the rocky surface.
None of us needed much encouragement to start the day with a good breakfast.
I went for Alpen and some yoghurt with fruit before some toast.
Our plan was to cycle towards Widnes for lunch, about 50km into what we knew was going to be the longest day.
Scheduled stops along the four days were always going to be roughly two hours in and we were fortunate to have Stephanie, the wife of chief navigator Mark, driving a support vehicle should
we need her.
We had been given prior warning that a recent Liverpudlian pastime among the youngsters is to bend Trans Pennine Trail signs into other directions.
Fortunately Mark had plotted a route using the Komoot app and we avoided any going around in circles – this day was going to be long enough as it was.
The next sight we saw after heading out of the city was the bridges close to Widnes’s Spike Island, first the Silver Jubilee Bridge and then the Mersey Gateway.
I enjoyed a cheese and onion panini to refuel and also topped up the water bottles.
It was a routine start to cycling after lunch as we followed St Helens’ canal down into Warrington for quite some time. The complications were about to start as we got to Lymm with that section of the trail closed.
There was a decent enough diversion in place but one ‘shortcut’ proved exactly that... unfortunately I was the sole victim of the thorn bushes. We now found ourselves in posh Cheshire. Think footballers’ wives... no, not the television series.
The village of Hale is among this kind of leafy heartland but does have a distinctive war memorial, complete with a small cannon.
As the temperature rose, the day seemed to keep dragging on and signs promising Stockport was ‘four miles away’ proved to be incredibly optimistic.
The next sign we saw, ten minutes later, said it was four-and-a-half away!
We had to weave around the streets of Stockport to find the hotel, which happened to be atop of the town’s only hill and all of us were glad to get settled down with a cold drink.
I had a quick shower and enjoyed jerk chicken and rice ahead of what is going to be another gruelling ride tomorrow.
This was only the third time I had gone past 100km but aside from wrist pain and a stinging leg, I was feeling okay. It had been a long day but we were pleased to have put a decent chunk into the mission in one sitting. I find that cycling long distance is a battle between the mind and the legs.
Matt, who I mentioned on page two, was my housemate at university and we had been joined at the start and end of the day by two former course mates, Ben and Daniel, who cheered us on. Organising to see people along the way proved to be a welcome boost, as did seeing donations come in at regular intervals during the day for Macmillan Cancer Support.
Komoot difficulty rating: Expert.
September
THE most enthusiastic to start this day was 64-year-old Neil... but I can assure you he’s no regular near-OAP. More about this colourful character later.
It was obvious today’s stage was going to be the most difficult with the small matter of the Pennines to get over.
So a big breakfast was called for again. I went for Weetabix and then poached eggs and beans on toast.
Eating more than usual is a weird feeling at breakfast but with a hot day predicted and loads of climbing, all the calories consumed were going to be burnt through rapidly.
I was surprised with how quickly we were out of Stockport town centre and seemingly weaving our way towards the big hills.
We were soon out of Greater Manchester and into Derbyshire where the elevation ramped up gradually. It was mostly done on the trails but there was an unpleasant road climb towards the village of Charlesworth.
A puncture to Neil’s front tyre gave us a bit of respite before the major climbing began and offered a chance to refuel a bit.
Anyone familiar with driving towards Manchester will know the village of Tintwistle and that is where we skirted around before seeing the first reservoir of the day, Bottoms.
From there you head along the trail nearby Woodhead Road and cross over to Valehouse Reservoir. This is where the scenery begins to take the pain away from your legs.
It had been noticeable that the flora and fauna had been slowly changing on the previous day’s ride but now it was more apparent as our only company are the grazing sheep. We are heading along the Longdendale Trail towards Woodhead Tunnel and then eventually Dunford Bridge, the entry point to Barnsley from the west. The altitude jumps from 200m above sea level to 250m by the time we are on the south side of Torside Reservoir but there is still another chunk of climbing to go until we are at the highest point of the entire TPT, known as Gallows Moss.
Unfortunately due to the jagged steps, cycling some of this ascent is impossible and we have to get off and push the stepped parts but we all endeavour to cycle whenever we can.
Neil, a former coal delivery man who is still lumbering around heavy goods, often fuelled by tins of pilchards, is in his element but even he has to take a break to remove his helmet as the climbing has all of us overheating.
It was neither the distance nor the gradient causing me the most problems but the surface itself. My tyres are slipping
constantly on the gravel making sure every pedal stroke is tougher. Vibration white finger(s) seems a possibility.
It is a relief to see tarmac again, even if it means another short, sharp climb (up to 440m) towards the rollercoaster descent down from Dunford Bridge.
My Garmin watch tells me I am hitting 50kmph down the hill and the relief in my legs and the wind in my face makes it even more enjoyable as we reach Penistone.
It’s not long before I am moaning about the surface again and the gravel track down from Coates Lane at Thurgoland to Silkstone Common is the worst on the entire TPT and pretty perilous.
The jumpy ride down there was made even more dangerous for Neil and I as he was stung for the second time in an hour on the same leg by a wasp.
His expletives and subsequent kungfu kick almost have me flying over the handlebars with laughter. Fortunately he can’t see me.
We had refuelled in Penistone with a sandwich each and a welcome cup of tea and I was given a further boost at Worsbrough with an impromptu visit from
my brother, James with my niece, Rose. It’s a steady ride back towards Wombwell, Wath and Bolton-upon-Dearne where we live and we have the extra comfort of knowing we will be spending the night in our own beds. My partner Krisztina happily makes me chicken Alfredo for tea. I know I will need the pasta to fuel me for the following day.
Komoot difficulty rating: Expert.
OUR numbers are boosted today with Nathan, another old university pal of ours, joining us.
It is rightly pointed out to him that today is the easiest of the lot.
The insult backfires as I end up paying for his breakfast (and later his lunch).
The heat is certainly going to be a problem today as it’s already pretty hot when we tuck into eggs on toast with a fruit smoothie.
It’s a later start too, as this is the shortest day, and Neil, regularly up at 5am, is straining on the handlebars to get going.
This part of the TPT is one most of us are familiar with, as it’s where we head out to regularly given its close proximity and quality of the road/trail surface in Doncaster.
If the section near Thurgoland is the worst part of the trail then the section from Mexborough to Sprotbrough is certainly the best.
This is the leg of the journey I would recommend for someone starting out cycling and heading towards Doncaster on the TPT ensures you get a good mix of terrain, places to refuel and sights to see, whether that is Manvers Lake, RSPB Old Moor or the brilliant Boat Inn at Sprotbrough.
Nathan, a resident of York but native of Northern Ireland, marvels at the sight of
Conisbrough Castle but it’s one we barely notice as we assuredly head towards Doncaster and then north.
The route from the confluence of the Dearne and Don near Pastures Road
would be described by any cycling commentator as ‘lumpy’ and we whizz down from the viaduct on the paved track rather than the more risky gravel route.
That is genuinely the only hill standing in our way between here and Selby but we know from experience that the flatness makes the ride boring rather than a breeze.
Matt and I have been to Selby and back before so know the complexities of the route meaning Mark’s beloved Komoot can enjoy a bit of a rest day.
The only real trouble is having to open
the railway bridge yourself near Barnby Dun and then the bumpy and seemingly never-ending route along the canal from Braithwaite to Sykehouse, where we have lunch off the barbecue at a large pub, the only site for miles.
With the temperature cranked right up to 30 degrees, an easy day on paper is becoming tougher on tarmac and the day is almost as sapping as the previous two had been.
Veering into Snaith takes us into the East Riding for the first time but you quickly snake back westwardly which adds to the illusion that Drax power station, always on the horizon, is never getting any closer no matter how much further you ride.
We know there is a double-header of England football and rugby union on television tonight which speeds us up as we get into Selby itself.
Nathan departs on the final spur of the TPT (which runs slightly uphill all the way to York) with our best wishes and later makes a generous donation to the cause.
As I mentioned earlier, all I needed to do to summon further inspiration was to look down at my bar bag to see a picture of my dad and Matt was getting a similar boost as the donations continued to roll in. Halloumi fajitas and a couple of lager shandies make it a pleasing end to the day, as does George Ford’s kicking accuracy against Argentina.
Komoot difficulty rating: Intermediate.
September 10
NONE of us leapt out of bed to get this one underway.
We wanted to get an earlier start in and with that in mind we had a quick breakfast of pancakes with maple syrup. It took me a while to get going properly and the terrain heading out of Selby did not help matters with a boggy area to navigate in the farmlands immediately east of the town. Heavy weather makes for heavy weather for hybrid tyres.
Fortunately we were soon meandering through the roads near Howden and we stumble across a brilliant ‘honesty cafe’ at The Old School at Blacktoft where we enjoy a cuppa and donate.
The group seem to naturally take turns on the front and move up and down the ‘peloton’ to ensure you’re frequently riding alongside and chatting with someone different.
These quiet roads also offer a chance for reflection. I think about how the landscape has altered but also how similar it is alongside the big rivers like the Mersey, Ouse and Humber.
We are fortunate enough to live on the TPT, a great resource on our doorstep, and it genuinely takes you closer to nature. We have seen herons, buzzards, deer and even a shrew.
There is, amusingly, a kestrel flying alongside us for some time as we head closer to the coast. A nice omen for the Barnsley lads among us.
We have lunch in North Ferriby, roughly halfway to our final destination and all have types of burger. I think we deserve it.
I also start covertly texting Matt’s wife, Sam, to let her know about an arrival time so she can surprise him
with their two sons.
Seeing the Humber Bridge is a very obvious sign we are getting closer and I’m sure a big relief to all of us.
I am feeling much better than I thought I would be but have real fatigue in my legs. I wanted to be fit enough to do this challenge without struggling, so I’m proud that I have managed to get in the condition to make this memorable rather than an ordeal.
My mind starts to plot what challenge I can take on next. This has been on the agenda for so long that completing
it means there is a bit of melancholy lingering and I know I will have to come up with something new to refocus on. But probably not for a while.
As we enter Hull itself I cannot help but think of my dad again. His mum had been from the city and I know he had treasured memories of visiting his grandparents here, going to the football matches and the seaside. We do go near the Sculcoates area of the city where the Ancient and Lewis side of my family lived.
Hull, aesthetically and probably like
most cities, changes with every ten pedalstrokes.
The Guildhall is a stunning building and we get a good view of the Britannia statue above it by heading down Alfred Gelder Street into the Old Town.
I think about how many of my ancestors would have gone through these same old streets. It’s amazing where your mind wanders to when you’re cycling this distance and, above all, it helps the miles pass by unnoticed. We head north into the outskirts and through several housing estates that the TPT weaves through. It soon becomes apparent we are getting closer to the coast, and thus the end, as the headwind we have been facing most of the day has more of a chill and salt to it than it had previously.
One last breather gives me a chance to update Sam on our estimated time of arrival and she and the boys, Rowan and Billy, prepare their ‘well done’ sign for our arrival.
We inadvertently finish how we started... by getting lost. You would think the signage for the TPT would be at its best at both extremities of it but that’s not the case and a road closure makes it even more confusing.
But we get going again and are greeted with a final downhill to the beach and a big welcome party.
None of us will ever know what it feels like to be Jonas Vingegaard and this has hardly been the Tour de France but there is a real sense of achievement and camaraderie at the end. It’s also a perfect setting, on a charming, typical British seafront, to finish.
There is time for an ice cream and a doughnut before heading home, relieved, aching and proud.
Komoot difficulty rating: Expert.
IT IS time to make a statement this Halloween.
But you don’t have to go to the old favourites. Stuck for an idea?
Here are ten of the best to go for...
1. Barbie.
The live-action Barbie movie came out in July 2023, so expect to see a lot of Barbie costumes this Halloween. You can go for the classic pink and blonde look, or get creative with a more unique interpretation.
2. The Little Mermaid.
The live-action The Little Mermaid movie also came out this year, so this is another great option for a Disneyinspired costume.
You can find Ariel costumes for all ages, from adults to toddlers.
3. Spider-Gwen and SpiderWoman.
These are two of the most popular superheroines right now, so they’re sure to be popular Halloween costumes.
You can find Spider-Gwen and Spider-Woman costumes in a variety of styles, from comic book accurate to cosplayinspired.
4. Wednesday Addams.
The new Netflix series
“Wednesday” has introduced a new generation to the iconic character. If you’re looking for a spooky but stylish costume, Wednesday Addams is a great choice.
5. Video game characters. Video games are a popular source of inspiration for Halloween costumes, and 2023 is no exception. Some of the most popular video game characters for Halloween include Mario, Luigi, Link and Lara Croft.
6. Horror movie characters.
If you’re looking for a scare, then a horror movie character costume is the way to go. Some of the most popular horror movie characters for Halloween include Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers and Pennywise.
7. Celebrity costumes.
If you want to dress up as your favourite celebrity, there are plenty of options to choose from. Some of the most popular celebrity costumes for Halloween include Marilyn Monroe, Elvis Presley, Audrey Hepburn and Freddie Mercury.
8. Historical figures.
If you want to go for a more sophisticated look, you could dress up as a historical figure.
Some of the most popular
historical figures for Halloween include Cleopatra and Marie Antoinette.
9. Couples costumes.
If you’re going to Halloween with a partner, you could coordinate your costumes. Some popular couples costumes include Harley Quinn and the Joker, Jack and Sally from “Nightmare Before Christmas”, and Eleven and Mike from “Stranger Things”.
10. DIY costumes.
If you’re on a budget or you want to be creative, you could make your own Halloween costume.
Sewage pollution by water companies of rivers and seas has increased over tenfold since Water Privatisation, with no effective action by government in this time.
Sewage is the biggest source of all infectious, diseasecausing material that is released into our environment.
Discharges are wholly unacceptable and dangerous to public health – particularly where river weirs & sea sprays spread faecal particulates over nearby populations.
Water company profits are calculated as a percentage of costs – low-cost, long-term solutions are ignored. Low cost emergency measures are not implemented.
Nature based solutions, like Reed Beds (that were introduced at high level to UK Gov in 1984) are deliberately obscured.
Causes of flood, drought, temperature extremes and water scarcity are misrepresented.
The highly profitable commodification of water -Smart Meters- is based on deliberately stupid land management.
Carbon Capture by putting sewage to (farm) land is far superior to (profitable) experimental technology.
The effects of subsidized chemical farming practices and the activities of water companies are not regulated in the public interest.
Community based and funded alternatives to water companies are practicable, possible and urgently required.
A COMMON misunderstanding is that as soon as the summer fades away... so do your gardening chances.
The reality is there are many jobs to be done in the garden right up to the winter months.
Here is a list of jobs to keep you busy.
• Plant spring-flowering bulbs.
September is the best time to plant spring-flowering bulbs, such as daffodils, tulips, crocuses and hyacinths. These bulbs need to be planted before the ground freezes, so get them in the ground as soon as possible. When planting bulbs, make sure to follow the depth and spacing recommendations on the packet.
• Divide herbaceous perennials.
Herbaceous perennials are plants that die back to the ground each winter and come back again the following spring. They can become overcrowded and rootbound over time, so it’s a good idea to divide them every few years. To divide a perennial, dig it up carefully and use a sharp knife or spade to separate the roots into smaller clumps. Replant the clumps in their new location and water well.
• Harvest your fruit.
September is the time for harvesting many types of fruit, such as apples, pears, plums and blackberries. Be sure to harvest fruit when it is ripe, as it will not ripen any further once it is picked.
• Collect and store seeds.
If you have any hardy annuals or biennials in your garden, this is a good time to collect their seeds.
To collect seeds, wait until the plant has finished flowering and the seed heads have turned brown. Cut the seed heads
off and place them in a paper bag to dry. Once the seeds are dry, store them in a cool, dry place.
• Prepare your garden for winter.
As the weather starts to cool down, it’s time to start preparing your garden for winter. This includes things like: Mulching your beds to help protect the plants from frost.
Trimming back any dead or diseased branches from your trees and shrubs. Covering any tender plants with a cloche or cold frame.
• Water your plants regularly. Even though the weather is starting to cool down, it’s still important to water your plants regularly. This is especially important for plants that are still actively growing, such as vegetables and fruit trees.
• Watch out for pests and diseases. As the weather cools down, pests and diseases can become more of a problem. Be on the lookout for things like slugs, snails, and mildew.
If you see any problems, take action
immediately to prevent them from spreading pests and diseases in the garden.
By following these tips, you can help ensure that your garden thrives throughout the fall and winter months.
If you live in a colder climate, you may need to cover your plants with frost protection, such as horticultural fleece or bubble wrap.
If you live in an area with heavy rainfall, you may need to install drainage in your garden to prevent waterlogging.
IS THERE anything more comforting than a warm dessert as the nights start to get darker and cooler?
We can let you be the judge yourself by trying out this recipe for homemade fudge.
Remember little tweaks can ensure it’s to everyone’s taste as fudge can be easily flavoured to whatever the household consensus is.
Ingredients:
125g unsalted butter, plus extra for greasing the tin
397g can condensed milk
450g light brown soft sugar
125ml whole milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
(Optional) 100g chopped chocolate
Instructions:
Grease and line a 20cm square tin with baking parchment.
Place the butter, condensed milk, sugar, and milk in a large saucepan over a medium heat.
Stir constantly until the sugar has dissolved and the mixture comes to a boil.
Reduce the heat to low and continue to stir for 10 minutes, or until the mixture reaches 115°C on a sugar thermometer.
Remove the pan from the heat and stir in the vanilla extract.
If you are using chocolate, add it now and stir until melted.
Pour the mixture into the prepared tin and smooth the top with
a spatula. Allow the fudge to cool completely in the tin before cutting into squares.
Tips:
For a richer flavour, use dark brown sugar instead of light brown sugar.
You can add other flavourings to the fudge, such as cocoa powder, nuts, or dried fruit.
To make a marbled fudge, add half a cup of melted white chocolate to the mixture before pouring it into the tin. Fudge can be stored in an airtight container at room temperature for up to two weeks.
Here are some additional things to keep in mind when making homemade fudge:
It is important to use a heavy-bottomed saucepan when making fudge, as this will help to prevent the mixture from burning.
Be sure to stir the mixture constantly while it is cooking, especially towards the end of the cooking time. This will help to prevent the sugar from crystallizing.
If you don’t have a sugar thermometer, you can test the temperature of the fudge by dropping a small amount into a bowl of cold water. If the fudge forms a soft ball, it is ready.
Allow the fudge to cool completely in the tin before cutting into squares. This will help to prevent it from crumbling. With a little practice, you’ll be making delicious homemade fudge in no time.
Saturday 18th and Sunday 19th November Saturday 2nd and Sunday 3rd December
There will be around 90 stalls, fabulous local crafters selling a wide range of:
JEWELLERY, COUNTRY CRAFTS, GIFTS, ARTWORK, CARDS, HOMEMADE SAVOURIES, BABYWEAR, FOOD and so much more
BACK in 2002, as a 12-year-old, a pumped-up hot hatchback was released by Volkswagen and it left quite the impression on my future taste in cars. Given I went on to buy multiple hot hatches as soon as I could, when I think about the early to mid-noughties, it is a period which spawned my absolute adoration for normal, daily cars which are plucked from mundane obscurity and transformed into B-road leviathans by clever engineers.
The car I refer to is the original R32 which, as its name would imply, had a 3.2-litre engine and curves Kim Kardashian would be proud of. Given it was based on the heavily criticised mark four Golf, which even in GTI guise was pretty woeful, it was fitted with a fourwheel-drive system, the sexiest seats known to man and a manual gearbox. Although the engine’s power output of 240bhp would be scoffed at these days, the noise it generated cemented it as a truly memorable car and it’s why – even now - when it’s rarely spotted on the roads people fawn over it simply because it was special.
Another R32 followed when VW brought out the mark five Golf, but it never really had the gobsmacking looks of its predecessor, despite possessing all of its sibling’s key characteristics underneath. However, it truly was a last-of-the-line car; soon after the ’32’ moniker was ditched and VW made its top-of-the-range Golf R, this time with a turbocharged engine which lost 1.2 litres, two cylinders and bucketloads of character.
The Golf line-up – now in its eighth generation – is now topped by this car, the R 20 Years, which looks equally as good as the car which started the dynasty. Sure, it’s a big old lump these days, but it’s jaw-droppingly handsome and is now a much more serious proposition thanks to its blistering pace which would bloody the noses of many cars double its £50,000 value.
When you dive into its spec sheet, it’s perhaps hard not to feel a pang of disappointment with the 20 Years’ recipe – it’s certainly not a stripped-out special the likes of Renaultsport have given us in the past. However, stay with me: peak horsepower has risen from 316bhp to 328bhp and the headlines are detailed trim differences and equipment bundled in for the price.
You get the same exterior styling treatment brought to the standard Golf R,
albeit with blue-coloured badges, contrasting mirror caps, an anniversary logo on the B-pillars, a ‘20 R’ puddle light projection (perhaps a bit tacky) and a combination of three exterior colours: Lapiz Blue –which first appeared 20 years ago – Pure White and Deep Black. Lapiz-coloured alloy wheels are perhaps a tad garish, but on the whole it’s typical hot Golf but with a few tell-tale touches.
Its interior, as you’d expect, is fantastic. The seats are great, the quality is second to none and although the wrap-round look
of the infotainment screen is aesthetically wonderful, the heater controls will annoy you within minutes. The scrollbar effect is slow, dim-witted and a simple, traditional alternative would be much better. One drawback is its steering wheel which, in my opinion, is far too thick and could be thinner.
Fire it up and your ears are met with a pleasing, purposeful burble emanating from its quad exhaust pipes. There’s Comfort, Sport and Race settings, and additional Drift and Nurburgring driving
modes. The latter is the one I often plumped for as it puts the dampers in their softest setting – perfect for our deteriorating road surfaces – but at the same time it ramps up the aggression on every other aspect, whether it’s its gearbox, throttle response or suspension.
Under the bonnet, there’s the familiar 2.0-litre turbo which has appeared in countless cars, but in 20 Years spec it receives an updated software package that allows its wastegate to open and the turbocharger to keep spinning during periods of trailing throttle.
VW claim this change allows better response, but in truth you’d be hard pushed to tell the difference over the regular R, however boost does build more rapidly. The slight power hike is also negligible in driving terms, but its mapping allows it to feel much keener throughout its rev range, and as it’s paired to a brilliant seven-speed semi-auto gearbox –also tweaked for more aggressive shifts – they marry up perfectly.
Get it on a fast, flowing road and you’ll be bowled over by its point-to-point pace. It dissects corners thanks to its sheer poise, formidable grip and eats up straights, no matter what the weather’s like, and it can be leaned on thanks to its four-wheel-drive security. It’s trustworthy, it’s entertaining and it’d take something with a lot of power to keep up with a well-driven 20 Years.
Is it as polished as, perhaps, a Civic Type R? No, but that’s not a dig at the Golf; little is as sharp as that Honda, including thoroughbred performance cars, but what the VW is is a can-do-all hot hatch which is enormously good at whatever you throw at it.
A fantastic, fitting version to mark the 20th anniversary.
The little boy inside Josh Timlin gets excited by driving his dream car...
