Logline: Frank, Linda, and Bartholemew worked as food-makers/cashiers at the famous hot dog joint, Carney’s. Too bad there was a zombie apocalypse going on, but they still got customers.
INT. CARNEY’S - EVENING
FRANK (scrawny), LINDA (jaded), and BARTHOLEMEW (gruff) are making hot dogs. THE PINSTRIPED MAN (customer, 50s) saunters through the door. He was dressed in a hat and pinstriped suit like a stray member of a barbershop quartet.
THE PINSTRIPED MAN Howdy doody, boys.
Linda rolls her eyes.
LINDA
Not you again.
The Pinstriped Man bows low, producing a cane from somewhere.
THE PINSTRIPED MAN I would like one hot dog please.
Bart strikes a tired yet intimidating pose.
BART
You’re not gonna just keep making them disappear again are you?
THE PINSTRIPED MAN Heavens no. I’m famished.
BART Alright.
Bart goes to whip up some dogs. Frank turns to Linda.
FRANK
Say Linda, I was coming down the I-15 today, and there was a zombie blockade. It was crazy.
Linda looked mildly surprised.
THE PINSTRIPED MAN
Now you see, the key to dealing with that, is splash a little water at them.
LINDA
Yeah, I don’t think so.
THE PINSTRIPED MAN
Have you tried it?
Frank turns back to Linda, both ignoring him.
FRANK So what are you doing Friday?
From the back, Bart gives him a giddy ‘ok’ sign.
LINDA
I’m going to the mall to watch zombies with some friends.
FRANK
Oh really? Me too!
LINDA
Oh, guess I’ll see you there.
BART Alright one hot dog.
THE PINSTRIPED MAN
A hot dog you say? Where?
Bart looks down to an empty tray.
BART Son of a—
graaaah was heard at the entrance to the cart.
The zombie lazily opens the door.
FRANK
Shit! Did we lock the door?
FRANK
Bart! You were supposed to do that!
THE PINSTRIPED MAN
Not to fear, fellow! Like I said. Do you have a cup of water? Thank you kindly. Now, watch and learn.
The pinstriped man heroically splashed the cup of water in the zombie’s direction to the held breath of the three staff members.
THE PINSTRIPED MAN
Begone you! And don’t return to this establishment!
Nothing happens. The zombie approaches and attacks The Pinstriped Man.
LINDA Shit shit shit!
The zombie climbs the counter and sort of fell on the other side. Slowly getting up…
BART
That’s right, that’s right…a little closer…
As the zombie inches closer, Bart grabs the back of its head and slams it to the hot stove, burning the zombie’s face off and it soon drops dead.
MR. ROBERTS barges in from his office.
MR. ROBERTS
What’s going in in here?!
BART
Nothing Mr. Roberts. We’ve got it under control.
Mr. Roberts surveys the two dead bodies.
MR. ROBERTS
Get that zombie out of here. And make sure to burn the other one.
BART Yes sir.
EXT. OUT BACK
Standing outside Carney’s in the back, Frank makes a makeshift bonfire while Bart lights a cigarette and holds a gallon of propane.
BART
I saw you asking Linda out back there. Smooth moves.
FRANK
It was less of me asking her out and more of me…making things up so I can follow her.
BART Hey, a date’s a date.
Bart douses the bonfire with propane and flicks his lit cigarette onto it.