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October 11, 2017

october 11





I honestly and truly can't think of a better time for Street's list of Most Eligible Bachelorettes to come out. Seriously, think about it. I feel like I haven't gotten good news in weeks. This semester has been shitty. People are low energy and stressed out and just wholly not happy to be at Penn. The news is dismal. Politics are miserable and something about the last couple of months just feel off, and dark, and generally unhappy. As a publication, it's Street's job to deliver news. But I can't help but feel the need to also provide something fun or a little heart warming. Sometimes, you

overheards, little penn victories





music marketing, in defense of radio


find your soul, check your privilege, NSOulmates





19 FILM & TV

Victoria and Abdul


OCaRt, sad girl art, black artistry

handshake renamed one arm hug

Orly Greenberg, Editor–in–Chief Dani Blum, Managing Editor Chloe Shakin, Audience Engagement Director Teagan Aguirre, Design Director Carissa Zou, Design Director Corey Fader, Photo Director

Nick Castoria, Highrow Beat Paul Litwin, Music Beat Amy Marcus, Music Beat Aliya Chaudhry, Music Beat Noah Kest, Music Beat Michelle Pereira, Music Beat Jess Sandoval, Music Beat Shoshana Sternstein, Lowbrow Beat Dano Major, Lowbrow Beat Lily Zirlin, Lowbrow Beat Cami Potter, Lowbrow Beat Noa Baker, Vice & Virtue Beat Lily Snider, Vice & Virtue Beat Morgan Potts, Vice & Virtue Beat Julia Messick, Vice & Virtue Beat Jillian Karande, Vice & Virtue Beat Molly Hessel, Vice & Virtue Beat Gina Alm, Arts Beat Sherry Tseng, Arts Beat Linda Lin, Arts Beat Michaela Tinkey, Arts Beat

Nick Joyner, Features Editor Julia Bell, Features Editor Angela Huang, Word on the Street Editor Dalton DeStefano, Film & TV Editor Annabelle Williams, Highbrow Editor Haley Weiss, Ego Editor Andreas Pavlou, Vice & Virtue Editor Talia Sterman, Music Editor Colin Lodewick, Arts Editor Claire Schmidt, Lowbrow Editor Catalina Dragoi, Film & TV Beat Michaela Reitano, Film & TV Beat Sabrina Qiao, Ego Beat Maria Riillo, Ego Beat Natalia Sanchez-Nigolian, Ego Beat Lucia Kim, Highbrow Beat Daniel Bulpitt, Highbrow Beat Angela Lin, Highrow Beat 2

need more celebration—especially the celebration of some brilliant, accomplished, and super talented ladies. So please, enjoy Street's list of only some of the amazing women at Penn. I hope it brings you the same sense of admiration and joy it brings me.




just want to pick up a paper and read something interesting, or entertaining, or something that makes you think hard about an art exhibit (pg. 24) or the love of a long–dated music system (pg. 10). The news exists to inform, but I also think there's room for sharing positivity, even if it's in some kind of small way. There's something important about celebrating the little wins. We're constantly surrounded by genuinely horrible news, and it's so, so important to be exposed to the lighter and happier things. But, in another way, Street's Most Eligible Bachelorettes isn't even that small or that light. We

Staff Writers: EIsabelle Fertel, Caroline Curran, Kiana Cruz, Clare Kearns, McKay Norton, Chen Chen Zhang, Brookie McIlvaine, Steph Barron, Lauren

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Donato, Frankie Reitmeyer, Jamie Gobreski, Brittany Levy, Jessica Li, Maria Formoso Zack Greenstein, Design Editor Christina Piasecki, Design Editor Katherine Waltman, Design Editor Gloria Yuen, Illustrator Anne Marie Grudem, Illustrator Avalon Morell, Photo Editor Autumn Powell, Photo Editor Megan Kyne, Photo Editor Christina Piasecki, Photo Editor Emily Hason, Video Director Daniel Rubin, Video Editor Megan Kyne, Video Editor Lea Eisenstein, Copy Director Sophia Griffith-Gorgati, Copy Editor Nancy Liu, Copy Editor Kimberly Batista, Copy Editor Colleen Campbell, Copy Editor Kolade Lawal, Copy Editor Cole Bauer, Social Media Editor Paige Fishman, Social Media Editor

Hanniel Dizon, Social Media Editor Carly Shoulberg, Social Media Editor Julia Klayman, Social Media Editor Merry Gu, Social Media Editor Chae Hahn, Social Media Editor Sarah Poss, Social Media Editor Lily Haber, Social Media Editor Unless otherwise noted, all photos are by Corey Fader, Autumn Powell, Megan Kyne, Christina Piasecki, and Brinda Ramesh. Contacting 34th Street Magazine: If you have questions, comments, complaints or letters to the editor, email Orly Greenberg, Editor–in–Chief, at You can also call us at (215) 422-4640. "I've never heard anyone say 'neck beards' so hatefully." ©2017 34th Street Magazine, The Daily Pennsylvanian, Inc. No part may be reproduced in whole or in part without the express, written consent of the editors (but I bet we will give you the a-okay.) All rights reserved. 34th Street Magazine is published by The Daily Pennsylvanian, Inc., 4015 Walnut St., Philadelphia, Pa., 19104, every Wednesday.


THAT'S SUCH A FUCKING LIE We're here to catch you in all your hyperbolic glory.



Translation: I didn’t go out last Translation: I have been studynight. ing secretly in my room for three weeks and don’t want Don’t give us that bullshit. you to start studying because I We saw you out on Thursday enjoy having the curve work in at the pregame, even though it my favor. only lasted four minutes. Maybe you didn’t stay out for long, We know you've gotten perbut Street knows you were try- fect scores on every recitation ing. We’re sorry you missed the quiz, and we know you aren’t mixer on Friday night, but we going to just start studying know we’ll see you Wednesday the night before the exam. But for Sink or Swim. Hope you never fear, we've been grinding can stay afloat. for the last 27 hours straight. Let the games begin.

Highbrow knows you don’t really mean half of the things you say. Whether it’s to avoid an awkward situation, get ahead of your peers, or to serve as one of those classic Freudian defense mechanisms, we hear you. In fact, we have a pretty good idea of what you really mean when you engage in this type of frivolous rhetoric. Please see the guide below to keep yourself well informed on the underlying meanings of your colleagues’ false claims.


Translation: I hate myself. No, you're not “really passionate” about investment banking. You want to make a lot of money and have fallen subject to Penn’s finance–pushing culture. And you also aren’t quite sure what you’re getting yourself into. Christ, what is a cash flow? We're praying for you, and we hope you do the same for us. Get well soon, xoxo.

Translation: I don’t think what you’re saying is funny and I don’t care to listen any longer. Highbrow knows that you don’t think what your friend is saying is funny enough for you to be “actually dying.” You're alive and well and wishing your friend would stop talking to you so you can go back to scrolling through Instagram and drinking your coffee in peace. We’re sorry you've been put through this tumultuous time.

over heard PENN at

Resigned WASP: “I stopped believing when God failed to answer my prayers for good dick.” Board casting a play (or describing a typical Penn student): "She's really unpleasant and entitled, but that's just part of her personality." High–riser: “I smoked before going through the wind tunnel and I swear I could SEE the wind.” WASP who has out–WASPed herself: "My mom had to drive Katherine Heigl from Manhattan to The Hamptons and back; she's so tired now."




word on the STREET



’ve had the same problem since I was ten. A month ago, I was going through my desk drawer, frantically searching for a pair of scissors to bring to college, when I came across the diary I kept in 5th grade. I flipped through its pages until something at the bottom of an entry made me stop: “There’s a girl in my class who is really pretty, and I think I have a crush on her. But I’m not like that." Add a couple more punchy verbs, and I could have written this yesterday. Seeing it in print made me so nauseous that I considered ripping the page out of my journal and throwing it away. But I knew disposing of my truth wouldn’t change it: I am bisexual. For years, I have tucked my sexuality behind strands of my thick, blonde hair and the thread of preppy clothing— pieces of myself that never made others question it. I am a quiet, petite, blue–eyed girl. Most people assume I’m straight. Starting in the eighth grade, I attended private school in Manhattan, and like every high schooler, I tried to fit in. But popularity wasn’t just dependent on looks. Gossip Girl isn’t all fiction—money mattered too. Subscribing to a culture of wealth I didn't completely belong in consumed most of my energy, and I lost pieces of myself along the way, or concealed them for convenience. Most of the time, I didn’t feel pretty enough, thin enough, 4

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or rich enough; however, being straight was a quality I shared with many of my classmates. It made me feel safe. But the comfort I found in hiding my identity was sometimes replaced with pain. I remember one afternoon, I was doing my homework in the commons area when I started

to cry. I was thinking about telling my friends. It felt too difficult, and dealing with my identity alone hurt. “Isa, what’s wrong?” a girl who’d noticed me asked. “Uh, just a boy problem.” I wanted more than anything to be honest. There were times when coming out felt like the right thing, but those moments were counterbalanced by small parts of the culture that made it feel like being queer wasn’t okay. In my high school, homophobia wasn’t overt; it hid in cor-

For years, I have tucked my sexuality behind strands of my thick, blonde hair and the thread of preppy clothing.

ners, ones I observed and used to push myself back into my closet. Girls hooking up with girls was mainly seen as an attempt to garner the attention of guys; boys in my grade called each other gay as an insult; and when someone would come out, it was gossip. When I got to Penn just over a month ago, I was determined to maintain the image of myself I curated in high school. I planned on strutting down Locust in designer clothes, rushing a sorority, and posting Instagrams with new friends. Instead, I found myself alone in my dorm room, struggling to cope with extreme loneliness. Every morning of NSO, I woke up in tears. I was homesick. I missed my friends. At times, I even yearned for the familiarity of high school. The only thing I found solace in was my writing, which required me to be the most vulnerable version of myself. I’ve always made excuses to procrastinate coming out. When I get into college, I’ll tell my friends. If I’m dating a guy, nobody has to know. Maybe this will go away. There is no right time to be open about who I am. The people who won’t accept me aren’t going anywhere, but neither is my sexuality. And I like lonely, honest Isabella better than insecure, materialistic Isabella, so I’m choosing to ignore the corners of bigotry that once limited me.

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PENN'S MOST ELIGIBLE BACHELORETTES Not all the good catches are taken. They're probably just too cool for you.




Isabella Cuan is a braniac with an artsy side. This BBB major and Art History minor is also a talented photographer, whose photo projects range from documenting her Cuban heritage to snapping candids at sorority and frat events. As the former Editor–in–Chief of The Walk, Isabella’s sense of style is almost as sharp as she is. One thing’s for sure— if you want to win over this stunning sweetheart, you’re going to have to be able to keep up. Isabella's favorite and least favorite parts of single life at Penn: "My least favorite is the fact that there isn’t anything wrong with being single, but yet, we stigmatize it. It’s okay to be single, but that’s not always how society operates. My favorite thing about being single is that I get to live my life on my own terms. Being single really lets you figure out who you are and what you want, completely uninhibited. This is a great age to do that." Isabella's biggest deal breaker: "My mom is my best friend, so it would be a deal breaker if someone didn’t like my mom as much as they liked me."

Sara Seyed, our only sophomore bachelorette, is a Philadelphia native studying BBB. This talented Dischord songstress and Collectve member will woo you with her sultry voice and overall music know–how. With plans to go into psychotherapy, Sara’s comfortable with getting into the more emotional side of things—just as long as you can impress her with your taste in music. Sara's ideal date: "A nice little dinner at a cute restaurant, then walking around a museum or in the city—especially if there’s a festival or something going on!" Sara's favorite and least favorite parts of single life at Penn: "My least favorite is the fact that the hookup culture at Penn sometimes makes it seem like nothing is ever going to happen romantically. But my favorite is that that leaves me a lot more time to focus on my friends and my activities! It’s one less thing to worry about."


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With a Biochem major and an Architecture minor, this Sigma Kappa cutie embodies the best of both the scientific and creative worlds. When she’s not working at the Wistar Institute, Cristina can be found tutoring Spanish in Philadelphia schools or eating copious amounts of Middle Eastern food. This bachelorette has an outdoorsy side, too—just ask her about her research on the Great Barrier Reef. What Cristina looks for in a partner: "I’m not sure I’ve had the best experience in looking for partners in the past, so maybe I need to revise the things I look for…everyone says that opposites attract, but I think there’s also a balance. I like a good sense of humor, and someone who can be spontaneous and go on adventures. I like someone who will push me out of my comfort zone." What you might not know about Cristina: "My dad’s from Nicaragua and my mom is from Italy, and even though I grew up in Cambridge, Massachusetts, I didn’t know English until I was four. People seem to be really surprised by that."

Photos: Autumn Powell



(C ’19)

Natasha Allen may have lived in Sweden until the age of 14, but this witty bachelorette likes her men as all–American as they come. Though she’s a Political Science and Econ double–major, she’s got a passion for history, and can list every U.S. President. To top it all off, she’s a pre–law frat star, Kite and Key tour guide, and the director of SPEC Connaisance. What Natasha looks for in a partner: "Someone that’ll bring me fries when I ask them to. I really just need someone who will bring me fries at random hours of the night. I’d accept McDonald’s as long as they’re not over– salted, but Hummus is really the way to go." The fastest way to Natasha's heart: "With a scalpel."

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This easygoing Texas engineer has devoted her time at Penn to City Step (she’s co–director), and she can bust the moves to prove it. To win this senior over, you’re going to have to impress her friends and family first—Carey won’t miss out on quality time with her roommates for just anyone. Carey's biggest deal breaker: "Being a misogynist. And, not to belittle dairy allergies, but if you can’t eat ice cream or cheese, we’re probably not going to be compatible. Oh and lastly, you have to have endurance on the dance floor." Carey's worst dating experience: "I went on a date with someone who worked at Lululemon, and they told me I wasn’t 'Lulu material.' I think I said something like, 'I think you meant that as an insult, but I’m going to take it as a compliment.'"

A baller on the court and a server on the floor, Deja Jackson is a communications major with a passion for Drake (she’s boycotting concerts until she gets to see him) and the Sixers (Ben Simmons, to be exact). If she’s not practicing with the women’s basketball team, you can find this athletic bachelorette working at City Tap House. Deja's ideal date: "Definitely something indoors. I hate being outside. I think it’s terrible. So my ideal date is eating something indoors, with some wine, just kind of chilling. Just a lot of food—I like to eat. I’m not into activity dates." The fastest way to Deja's heart: "If you know the references I make to tweets, memes, or vines, I think we’ll get along very well. A lot of what I say in general is a reference to something, and if people get them and like them too, I’m very happy about it. Otherwise they’re like, 'What the fuck are you saying?'"

This French heartbreaker will have you saying “Je t’aime” before you even realize you’re hooked. As a co–founder of Epsilon Eta, Alix knows what she’s passionate about and is determined to make a difference in the world working in corporate sustainability. This senior won’t be falling for your frat boy charm—she’s a connoisseur of classic literature (especially the French stuff), and is happy to remain a bachelorette until she finds a man who’s ready to sit and ponder life with her. Alix's thoughts on dating at Penn: "Dating in the U.S. in general is just so different from dating in France. I don’t understand American dating at all. In France, it’s so straightforward: you like the person, the other person likes you, you go on dates. But in the U.S., you text the person, they Snapchat you, you like their Instagram, they Facebook message you. I refuse to play the texting game. If I’m interested in someone, I’ll ask them out. They’ll know."


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RADIO Radio's dying. Here's why I miss it.

'90s kids have seen just about everything when it comes to the evolution of listening to music. Early childhood is marked by vintage memories of poking skinny fingers into the notched holes of my parents' cassettes, winding them by hand before popping them into the clunky boom–box. Kindergarten is colored by the all consum-

ing excitement of CD’s—I remember shoving my black zip–up CD case into my backpack and secretly showing off my collection on the blacktop during recess. Elementary school was revolutionized by the Walkman. Its sleek, portable body changed everything—I could hold it in one hand while I walked the dog with the other; I could slip it

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in the mesh side paneling of my backpack on the bus ride to school; I could even hide it inside the folds of my hoodie when my parents dragged me to church. And then of course, middle school meant iTunes and Pandora. Then high school meant Spotify. College meant TidalWave, and so on. '90s kids have seen it all. We were around when music and

technology were growing together. But throughout all this change, all this evolution, one thing was constant: radio. Radio has been there through it all. Radio was the DJ before DJs were even around. It played through the tinny stereo at high school dances, in the plastic speakers in my car. It was there for the good times and the bad. Sadly, however, radio is a dying art form. In the wake of streaming, radio is no longer necessary—it’s now a relic of the past. But being home over the summer and driving in my 2005 Honda Pilot, a car far too old for an aux cord (hell, it still has a cassette player), I was forced to listen to the radio. And here's why I missed it. Radio was the first thing that gave me a sense of freedom. As a kid, I constantly fought with my brother to control the stations. As a teenager, it became a source of pride, of agency— after getting my license, nothing felt cooler than rolling up to school with the perfect song playing. Choosing a radio station said something about you: Wild 94.9 meant you were cool and popular, Alt 105.3 meant you were edgy, Mix 106.5 meant you were the friendly girl next door. But more than that, radio

brought people together. It was a shared, communal experience, and driving to high school every morning, I knew my friends were probably listening to the same channels, heard the same jokes cracked by the same radio personalities, drove through the same dead zones. There was something exciting, thrilling, and nervewracking about not being in control of the music—of not knowing what song would come next—and instead putting your trust in someone miles away holed up in a studio. Radio was, above all, a human interaction. I felt as if I knew the radio personalities I listened to. I craved their voices, their anecdotes; I wanted to know about their lives. I knew they were choosing their playlists for me—there was a sense of intimacy, of closeness that you just can’t get from a generic Spotify playlist. Radio is a realtime connection, not one retroactively revived through listening to someone else’s playlist streamed hours, days, or even months after it was created. Radio happens in the moment. So as I returned to school in the fall, I realized I probably won't be listening to the radio again until the next time I'm in a car. Radio, you'll be missed. MICHELLE PEREIRA





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Exercise class or privilege performance?

CHECK YOUR At 113 South 13th Street, the name is stated in bold, metallic letters above the heads of the health–conscious Rittenhouse crowds: SOULCYCLE. It’s a call for the uni-

fication of mind, body, spirit, and stationary bike. There is not a surface inside the yellow–washed facility that is devoid of an uplifting quote: “Find your soul!” encourages

one neon light fixture. The far wall of the studio dubs you “Athlete, Legend, Warrior, Renegade,” and even “Rockstar.” Finally, a tank top on the merchandise rack

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promises your future: “Love At First Ride.” Will it be? For $30 (excluding the extra $3 for shoe rental, extra $2 for a bottle of Smartwater in case you forgot your own, and the cost of the Uber ride there and back), you can book a bike for a 45–minute cardio blast with any of the well–worshipped instructors. There is no student discount, though first–time riders get $10 off their first class. The price is wildly high for a single workout class. But it's also coughed up, once or twice a week, by a not–insignificant portion of the Penn student body. For some, they swear that the experience, though pricey, is worth their pennies. “I’m not just paying for a spin class. SoulCycle is like therapy for me,” says one College sophomore. “It doesn’t matter how stressful, dramatic, or terrible my day has been, when I walk into the studio I immediately feel happy and a sense of relief and purpose…I pay $30 for a kickass 45–minute killer workout, therapy for my mind and soul, and a solid

period of time to re–center and focus myself and think about my goals. You gotta do what works for you to help your mental and physical health.” Her story is one that’s been told before. For many, SoulCycle is an exercise that helps them to stay both fit and sane, which for them is a responsible and respectable practice. The studio itself does effectively get these values across in every part of its aesthetic; it’s a near perfect example of lifestyle marketing. The yellow–shirted receptionists beam at you as you print your initials next to your bike number, and take a polaroid of clients that request it; they hang these on the wall to commemorate the work that the whole community has done. The locker rooms sparkle and the showers are stocked with citrus scented products available to everyone who takes a class. There are online articles consistently posted to their website about different riders in the community; this week, the featured rider Erin Kessling “Embraced the Army of Love After Heartbreak.” All


of the instructors spew words of empowerment throughout the whole class, meditations on topics from self–care, self– love, and self–acceptance to the appreciation of the body as a magic machine and its marriage with the mind. “I will be good to you if you will be good to me,” says one teacher, Yael, of this relationship, “Just think about that: I will take care of you if you will take care of me.” But what is most noteworthy about SoulCycle is not what it doesn’t include; instead, it is about who. SoulCycle is socioeconomically exclusionary—there is no way to deny that. To go even once a week for one semester, the total cost comes out to

roughly $525 if you’re paying for single classes, or for the comparable package they offer, $540 for 20 classes. The only possibility of getting around this price is through their College Ambassador program, in which different colleges and college groups are allowed free rides as a marketing tool. Though this program is not yet implemented in the relatively new Rittenhouse Studio, Laurel Jaffe (C ’20) managed to get ahead of the game on this trend and organize free rides for one class to her fellow PennQuest Leaders. “For the PQ ride, I talked with the managers at the Rittenhouse studio about PennQuest, it's mission and how


similar some of the values of a completely free ride but we mentorship [and such] are,” were able to get 20 free seats She says, “Because the formal in the class.” Hopefully, if this trend continues, more events like this might make the exercise classes accessible to many more people. Unfortunately, even those free group rides won’t last sustainably. Though the leaders as a whole seemed to enjoy the experience, even after a free ride they remained skeptical. “I enjoyed the exercise but I felt like the whole culture surrounding it is way over the top,” says Amos Armony (C ’20), “Not worth the price, in my opinion.” He echoes the sentiments of many, and beyond that, gets at the cold, Ambassador program is not hard socioeconomic truth in place yet we could not get of the business; the price is

"It's not what SoulCycle doesn't include, it's who."

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beyond “not worth it.” The price is, in fact, completely unsustainable and exclusionary for anyone who is not extremely privileged. What’s more, SoulCycle seems to be a magnet for specifically Penn students. One cannot simply attend a class without bumping into a classmate. If one of your Snapchat friends goes to the studio, you’re sure to know from their guaranteed mirror–selfie story. So, in a campus culture where flaunting wealth already seems to dominate many social realms, maybe the draw is just that: maybe SoulCycle provides yet another stage that people can use for their performance. LILY SNIDER

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The Temporality of Freshman Friends

Photo: Public Domain // CC.0 Each year, the blistering mid–August heat beckons a new class of Penn students. Hordes of freshmen rush to meet roommates, plug in refrigerators, and hang fairy lights in dorm rooms. They push carts, overflowing with posters and clothes, microwaves and shower

caddies, struggling to keep track of their belongings. But large suitcases aren’t the only things that freshmen latch onto. Unsure and anxious, they ruthlessly search for friends to explore their new environment with. These makeshift friendships are generally short–lived,

but it’s often more difficult for freshmen to experience the beginning of college alone than to hang out with people they probably won’t talk to again. So they choose companions— either a couple of kids from their hall, a pre–orientation program or acquaintances from


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high school—to become their NSOulmates. “The first week you’re just trying to meet as many people as possible… It’s really hard because everybody at one time is thrown into this really unique and different situation,” said Zoe Early (C’20). During NSO, freshmen run from mandatory panels to frat parties to Convocation, with little space in between. They are forced to juggle Penn’s social scene, getting ready for their first classes, and homesickness. The responsibility of navigating all of these new things doesn’t leave much room for freshmen to be picky when it comes to their friends. They forge relationships with people they have little in common with because it’s convenient. But as time progresses, these social groups change. “I only see my hall mates from freshman year walking down Locust or something like that. I don’t really hang out with them [anymore],” said Nick Hunsicker (C’19). It’s tricky to get a feel for where one fits in at Penn, particularly during NSO when classes haven’t started, and most aren’t involved in any clubs yet. It isn’t surprising that NSOulmates don’t usually stick to-

gether. College freshman Ally DiGiovanni described her experience meeting people so far: “… In the beginning you just kind of know that everyone is scrambling to make friends just as much as you are… Mainly the people I’m friends with I live near,” she said. Clubs are one of the best networking opportunities for freshmen to meet like–minded students. So once NSO comes to an end and everyone starts to settle in, the clusters of freshmen who, weeks earlier, were dressed in all black walking to parties together, begin to go their separate ways. “I definitely think there’s some sort of evolution [going on]. We’re all starting to kind of find different families at Penn whether it’s an a cappella group or a performing group or a writing group or whatever it is,” said Anthony Scarpone–Lambert (N’21). Although NSOulmates are impermanent in the lives of freshmen, they should be appreciated. There is something unique about acknowledging how vulnerable one is as a freshman, and having someone to begin to figure it out with. ISABELLA SIMONETTI


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Penn Outside the Bubble

A Past and Future of Gentrification

The Master Plan and Black Bottom

Pushed out by Penn

Ivy League Manifest Destiny

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Checks and Debts

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Forget wine pairings: these are the work–drink combos necessary for midterm season. With the mid–semester slump upon us, these are the drinks necessary to power you through your long days (and nights) of studying.

comforting you for, once again, putting off ten chapters of reading til the last minute. Sure, the syllabus said it's all "required," but you didn't think the professor would expect you to WORKLOAD: actually know it for the exam. LECTURE READINGS At least holing up in a cafe all Drink: Coffee day comes with its advantages: Caffeine: 95 mg It's the perfect way to rebuild Coffee is like a warm hug your intellectual image after

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too many slurred Snapchat stories this semester. WORKLOAD: PROBLEM SET Drink: Red Bull Caffeine: 111 mg So you have a problem set due at 11:59 p.m., but plans for Smokes' at 12:01 a.m. Red Bull is the ideal drink to take you from work hard to play hard. If you love living on the edge, add a shot of vodka to your drink when you reach your final problem for a smooth transition into your pregrame. Didn’t submit it on time? Well, at least you're already tipsy.

WORKLOAD: MULTIPLE MIDTERMS Drink: 5–Hour Energy Caffeine: 215 mg It’s a beautiful Saturday afternoon: the leaves are falling, the sun is shining, and the fall breeze is blowing. Well, at least that’s what it looks like from the Van Pelt Basement windows. Who has time to enjoy the season when you have three midterms next week? 5–Hour Energy will give you the long– term focus necessary for a full day of studying. Just don’t focus on stalking everyone’s pumpkin

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VICTORIA AND ABDUL REVIEW Judi Dench truly is a Queen.

The name “Karim Abdul” probably doesn't ring any bells, but his connection with the second–longest reigning monarch in British history might surprise you. Made public in 2010, Abdul’s diaries revealed his intense friendship with Queen Victoria during the nearly 14 years preceding her death. Victoria and Abdul, based on the book of the same name by Shrabani Basu, and a somewhat–sequel to the 1997 film Her Majesty, Mrs

Brown, details this somewhat recently discovered historical narrative. The film begins with a look at Abdul’s life in Agra, India, where his job is to write prisoners’ names into a ledger. We don’t stay here for long. Within the first five minutes of the film, Abdul is one of two men chosen by British officials to journey to England to present Queen Victoria (played by the incomparable Judi Dench) with a ceremo-


nial coin. Abdul is immediately thrust into 19th century British royal life filled with uppity servants and racist remarks. The subtle jabs don’t seem to affect Abdul, played by the engaging Ali Fazal. His optimism is palpable and endearing, but seems to elude the house staff who refer to him as “the Hindu.” When it is time to present the ceremonial Indian coin to the Queen, Abdul is told multiple times to “not look at her.” Of

course, he looks straight into her blue eyes. There would be no story if he didn't. What follows is a sweet albeit strange story of friendship. The Queen, initially taken with Abdul’s charm and good looks, becomes enthralled with his knowledge and kindness. Abdul becomes progressively more and more involved in her life and royal duties, starting as her footman and ultimately becoming her “munshi," or teacher.

He kisses her feet, entertains her subpar singing, and tutors her in Urdu. Their interactions are often natural and sweet, but sometimes, as expected, marred with cliché. There seemed to be a collective sigh in the audience when Abdul tells the Queen, “life is like a carpet.” Yet this quip seemed to fit in perfectly with Abdul’s character. He is a teacher to the Queen, so these kinds of mantras, which might seem silly out of context, are

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welcomed. For the most part, the film deals quite well with accurately and respectfully representing Indian culture. For example, when Abdul’s wife arrives at the palace, she is concealed from head to toe in black. The Queen has to request access to see what she looks like under her dress, and when she finally does, proclaims that Abdul’s wife is beautiful. However the film’s major flaw almost stems from moments like these, where it paints Queen Victoria almost as a savior. She may have been accepting, but was by no means progressive. It seems as if director Stephen Frears may have been searching for a historical foothold that did not exist. This is not to the fault of Judi Dench, who is witty, funny, and unapologetically British. Photo By: BBC Films The film’s shining moments belong to her and her innate ability to balance vulnerability and

a friend. But their friendship does not come without challenges. The Queen’s house staff and her indignant son Bertie, Edward VII, thoroughly disapprove of Abdul’s role in her life and actively try to thwart his influence. Their conversations, while often comical, are tinged with intolerance and prejudice. Ultimately, after Queen Victoria’s death, they get their way. Edward VII banishes Abdul from the palace and orders that all of Abdul’s memories of the Queen (books, photos) be burned. Despite this, the film ends on a high with Abdul back where we found him, in Agra. The final scene finds him bowing to the statue of Queen Victoria in nonetheless refreshing. This is front of the Taj Mahal. He kissbest exemplified when Victoria es her feet, sweetly commemoconfides in Abdul, telling him, rating both his culture and hers. “I am so lonely.” As he comforts her, something becomes CATHERINE DE LUNA clear: the Queen simply wants power. It is no secret Dench can play a historical figure without resorting to gimmick or imitation (we have seen her do it twice before in Shakespeare in Love and Her Majesty, Mrs Brown), but her performance is


Penn’s Premiere Middle Eastern Dance and Drum Troupe Performance and belly Dance lessons

Oct 26th, 5:30-6:30pm Platt student performing arts house Rm 160 Stouffer Commons 3702 Spruce Street 2 2 3 4 T H S T R E E T M A G A Z I N E O C T O B E R 1 1 , 2 017

MIDDLE EAST CENTER University of Pennsylvania





REALITY TELEVISION When we need to escape from our own reality, it helps to resonate with someone else's. When we need to escape ess. It’s the art of war, and she’s from our own reality, it helps holding a margarita. to resonate with someone else’s. Here are some recommendaIf you’re a Communications tions to get you through: major, you should watch: MTV UK’s Geordie Shore. If you work at WilCaf, you This is the bigger, badder, should watch: Bravo TV’s Be- British twin of Jersey Shore. low Deck and/or Timber Creek There are actually many facets Lodge. that the communications major Both of these Bravo TV would find interesting. Being a shows expose the behind–the– “Geordie” is all about presentascenes of the service industry, tion, language, messaging, and following young adults work- marketing. Just give it a chance. ing on both a luxury yacht and in a high–end ski resort. There’s If you’re involved with The an unparalleled, sick relish that Walk, you should watch: comes with listening to some- VH1’s RuPaul’s Drag Race. one else gripe about the same In order to seize the highly sort of bull honkey you experi- coveted title of America’s Next ence at work. Drag Superstar, a queen has to possess impeccable craftsmanIf you are a student athlete, ship, imaginative vision, and or pre–law, you should watch: killer instinct. Thirteen drag MTV’s The Challenge. queens compete for the title, The Challenge is a game and in such a cutthroat envishow spun off from other re- ronment, nobody succeeds if ality shows on MTV, recruit- they’re not willing to go balls– ing previous contestants from to–the–wall. Under the leaderReal World, Road Rules, and ship of the fabulous RuPaul, Are You the One? to complete this show combines rococo outrageous challenges with the fashion with sheer entertaindistant hope of fame and glory. ment. This show is all about how you play the game. Each contestant If you’re a freshman, you follows a particular strategy to should watch: VH1’s Dating get to the top, be it politicking, Naked. manipulation, promiscuity, or Dating Naked encourages just outright physical prow- young singles to attend blind

This show follows young up– dates in the buff. This show will “perfect match” that has been help introduce any incoming predetermined through a sci- and–coming hip–hop artists as freshman to the ins and outs entific dating algorithm. The they attempt to make it big in of Penn’s hook–up culture (Ed. contestants have 10 chances to Hollywood. You can watch as note: Kidding, but, you know, match up with their designated these stars juggle trying to break Flexible Leasing Single Double Rooms • entertainment induspartners, andand if they are successinto the only kinda), and perhaps in- • ful,Amenities they will all walk with try with their hectic personal spire Individual them to act Leases boldly and • All andaway Utilities Included their share of 1 million dollars. lives. It’s great insight into what behave outside of the box. This show combines the messi- comes with fame. If you study either Philoso- ness of humanity with the exCall phy or Statistics, you should hilaration of theorizing. watch: MTV’s Are You the One? 215.662.0802 Twenty single men and If you’re in an a cappella MICHAELA REITANO Love women are thrown into a house group, you should watch: Email and told that they each have a and Hip Hop.

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HELEN NIE'S NEW EXHIBIT CHALLENGES THE CONVENTIONS OF OCR An artistic look at Penn's very own recruitment process Theoretically, the McNeil building shouldn't get that much attention. It's obscured by Huntsman and Commons. It looks unremarkable from the outside. However, McNeil is home to Career Services, a basement office that serves as the physical hub of Penn's pre–

professionalism. It’s where people interview for their dream job: a business development operations analyst. But really, who actually wants to be a business development operations analyst? What even is that? These are the questions

Photos courtesy of Helen Nie Helen Nie (C ’18) addresses in her recent art installation, titled When I Grow Up. For Helen, When I Grow Up is essentially a commentary on “the way that the OCR process has become very glorified on campus—as the only way to get to something that you want. Or

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sometimes you don’t even want it and you’re just going for it for the sake of going for it.” Each slab of granite encircling McNeil is stickered by job titles, such as "Associate Management Consultant," "Technical Marketing Coordinator," and "Point Solutions Sales Lead." “They are all just really long titles, which just by looking at it, you would have no idea what the job actually entails, which to me, is kind of a red flag. People are trying so hard to get these jobs that they never would have found or thought they would have wanted had it not been for Penn serving it to you on a silver platter,” Helen said. The ambiguity of each position is no coincidence; it illustrates the glorification of the OCR process and how we collectively tend to just dump our résumés without really considering what the job entails. The process is the sole means to an end, an end that for many translates into Wall Street or consulting. Using vinyl stickers cut from a vinyl machine, Helen presents When I Grow Up in Times New Roman, 12pt font, and in italics—the standard format for a resume. Upon first glance, it’s just one job title. But the empty

job titles do not end after that. With each step, there's another long job title, an homage to the list as it appears on Handshake. Looking down at the title on the curbside, it holds little meaning—so why is it that Penn attaches so much value to these titles when they appear on Handshake? The piece is reminiscent of two other artworks on campus: Locust Bridge and 125 Years. Locust Bridge has engraved into it the names of famous alumni who have since donated or contributed financially in some form to Penn. 125 Years is a remembrance of the history of women on Penn’s campus, though the wording on the piece does not fully represent women as they should be viewed by modern standards. Because When I Grow Up is shown in a similar format as these two pieces, it is implied that there is a degree of import to its content. But at a closer look, the names are only job titles devoid of real meaning. Growing up is inevitable; it's a process that shapes all of us. But we get to decide how and what we grow up to be—and maybe we need a reminder of that. SHERRY TSENG



BLACK ARTISTRY AT THE SMITHSONIAN "It is a different experience, being in a museum about black culture with people who understand my struggle instead of being in a classroom with people who may not understand me."

Oct 18th 7:00pm Location: Class of 1923 Arena at the University of Pennsylvania

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Source: Ted Eytan, Flickr // (CC 2.0)

reshman residents of Fisher Hassenfeld and Hill College Houses saw 616 years of African American experiences in just four hours during a trip to the Smithsonian National Museum of African American History and Culture. In September, the Smithsonian National Museum of African American History and Culture commemorated its first anniversary. As part of the celebration, the Museum held two “Community Days” with special programs highlighting local Black talent. Sponsored by Makuu, a group of Penn freshmen traveled to Washington, DC to take part in the festivities. The museum has five floors. The first three separate African American history into different eras with stunning attention to detail, the fourth houses interactive exhibits, and the fifth is dedicated to modes of cultural

expression relevant to the African American identity. It is on this floor that one finds the exhibits Visual Art and the American Experience, Taking the Stage, and Musical Crossroads, which display artwork, motion picture relics, and musical accomplishments by African American artists. The four hours students spent at the museum were not enough time to browse all the information it offered. Michelle Gilliard Houston, associate director of Makuu, explained the importance of the day trip. “I think that a visit to the African American Museum for people of African descent is necessary to affirm all of our contributions to this country. It’s something that people should try to make their pilgrimage," Houston said In a country where the needs and contributions of African Americans are often over-

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looked, artistic outlets of expression are necessary for many reasons: 1) to educate and inform others of Black culture, 2) to celebrate and recognize African American contributions in a society that generally fails to do so, and 3) to inspire and guide future generations of Black Americans. With artwork that focused on the theme of “Blackness,” the Visual Art and the American Experience exhibit touches on all three of these reasons. Upon first glance, the exhibit is reminiscent of other art galleries. The colors are eye catch-

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n 1989, a collective of feminist artists known as “Guerilla Girls” protested the lack of female artists in galleries through their most recognizable, provocative poster that inquired, “Do women have to be naked to get into the Met. Museum?” While the Public Art Fund of New York City originally commissioned their design for a billboard, the Fund rejected the Guerilla Girls' work after seeing it. The rejection demonstrated that mainstream, curated art spaces were not genuinely accepting of the narratives of women. Even in 2015, only eight percent of the artists on display in the Museum of Modern Art’s collections were women. Now, though, women artists can force audiences to pay attention to the most intimate female experiences, using easily accessible platforms like Instagram to challenge conventional narratives of what womanhood entails. These emerging creatives focus on the performance of female sadness and reject how vulnerability in women is conflated with weakness. Not all women have professional success, a general state of hap-

piness, or desire to upkeep a veneer of emotional strength. In a world that generally associates contemporary feminism with the notion of strong women who rebuff dependency, the visibility of sad women becomes a radical act in itself. In an interview with Nylon Magazine, prominent visual artist and feminist theorist Audrey Wollen succinctly delineated “Sad Girl Theory” as the notion that “the sadness of girls should be witnessed and re–historicized as an act of resistance, of political protest.” She suggested that “protest doesn’t have to be external to the body. Girls’ sadness isn’t quiet, weak, shameful, or dumb: It is active, autonomous, and articulate. It’s a way of fighting back. The number–one cause of death globally for girls between 15 to 19 is suicide, and yet, [girls are told] that her sadness is individual and to keep quiet about it. Instead of trying to paint a gloss of positivity over girlhood, forcing self-love down [girls’] throats, feminism should acknowledge that being a girl in this world is one of the hardest things there is, and that sadness is actually a very appropriate reaction.”

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Implementing this ideology into their artwork, artists like Molly Soda, Melissa Broder, Hobbes Ginsberg, and Vivian Fu blur the lines of accepted personal and public spheres of life to starkly show what women and gender–nonconforming individuals experience day–to– day. In many ways, “Sad Girl Theory” allows the most marginalized individuals to reclaim ownership of their identities. Asian–American artist Vivian Fu recalls growing up inundated with narratives of subordinate, “sidekick” Asian women. Through her own work, however, Fu visually documents her life, becoming her own protagonist. While these artists tend to use Instagram to display their visual and/or performance art, a growing number of “Sad Girls” use NewHive, an online platform for multimedia art. Through NewHive, artists can weave words, images, videos, and audio to express themselves. One artist in particular, Creepyennui, explicitly displays her body image issues and anxiety disorder through self–aware, ironic art on NewHive. In her most popular piece, It Isn’t Pretty After A While, Creepyen-

nui layers an audio of her speaking about her anxieties concerning her figure with a video of her removing her makeup in bed. By viewing such private subject matter through the intimacy of one’s computer screen, the observer receives a glimpse into the lived experiences of the artist. It’s more personal than any art gallery outing. While some consider such art mundane, “Sad Girl Theory” reminds us that using public platforms to document traditionally feminine emotions bravely oppose those who try to silence women’s sorrow. Though the Museum of Modern Art and other galleries have yet to truly prioritize women’s art, artists who epitomize “Sad Girl Theory” take the matter of representation into their own hands, imploring that their melancholy and art be acknowledged.

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MORE ACCURATE OCR EXPERIENCE Only a few months after converting its undergraduate student career search service from PennLink to Handshake, Penn has decided to rename their job searching website. “Handshake was named because of the implied introductory motion of a handshake that often occurs during networking events. However, after careful consideration and observation of these events, we have decided to rename Handshake 'OneArmedHug,' because of the surveyed behavior that often occurred at OCR events,” said head of Career Services Margaret Reed. The committee in charge of choosing a new name stated that they wanted to foster a more community–centered OCR. They argued that a handshake, while polite, is a very formal—and unrealistic—way to greet professionals, and that students might be better suited to the more friendly (albeit awkward) situation that a one– armed hug creates. “We saw many students approach alumni at networking events, and many were posed with a moral dilemma: to handshake or to hug?”

Putting the "cute" in "recruiting"

said, Steven Smith, who lead the name–change committee. He agreed that the handshake/hug dilemma is one that occurs often and thought that, for now, a one–armed hug is the perfect compromise of the two: comfortably placed in between a full embrace and a formal introduction. One student agreed that this would be the positive change students have been waiting for for so long. “A smile immediately creeps over my face when I log onto OneArmedHug, rather than the chill down my spine that occurred when logging onto Handshake in the past,” said Katie Johns. “It really makes OCR into something so much warmer and friendlier.” The hope of the committee is that, down the line, OneArmedHug might be changed to Embrace to truly create a united recruiting network built on the foundation of kindness, teamwork, and love. “But that seems a little unrealistic at this juncture, so for now, we’re happy with OneArmedHug.” CAMI POTTER

Illustration: Gloria Yuen


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Brb saving the planet

It was a warm, sunny Tuesday afternoon. Samantha McGee (E '19) was just about to close her computer after a few hours of studying, but decided to check Facebook before walking home. A few of her friends had decorated their profile pictures advocating for the latest human rights issue. “Wow,” she thought, “This is such a great way to get the word out. I’m going to pick the one with the doves and laurels.”

“We see these problems every day,” said Alexa Macklin (C '18), “but luckily, slacktivism is now totally just activism. We used to actually have to pour a bucket of ice on their head to raise awareness! Can you imagine?" “I just don’t have time to go to meetings for charitable groups on campus. So when Facebook gives me a cute way to decorate my already cute AF profile picture from the pumpkin patch last fall, I


will,” said Samantha. She added that she sees her actions as beneficial on all fronts. “Do good and look good, that’s what I say.” However, a friend of Samantha, Cameron Foster (C '19) doesn’t understand this phenomenon. “If I wanted to help communities or promote causes, I will usually search their website and find out ways I can get involved or donate.” Cameron hasn’t always felt

this way. “I won’t lie, there were a few years where I genuinely thought I did the ice bucket challenge for someone other than myself, but after a while, it was pretty clear I only did it for the attention,” he added. Cameron now tries to actively engage in the communities that need his help, adding that “once I stopped obsessing about getting likes on a status that just says 'SO FUCKING DONE WITH THIS ADMINISTRATION'

and started actually volunteering, it was pretty easy to change.” Later that Tuesday night, Cameron passed Samantha as she reposted her profile picture, this time adorned with doves and hearts. When asked about what she was doing, Samantha added, “Oh, nothing. Just saving the world.”


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