Zoomoozophone Review - Issue 1 / April 2014

“Release your inner nerd!” said the tectonic boy, pointedly The science fair also featured lithosphere Ophelia and tornado gust Johnson Cardboard Wonderland sponsored by Zephyrhills Water Engineering Systems The blowing in the streets hints at Roaring Twenties trenchcoat smoke and shadow god parlors stenchcraft, or automobiles as they’re called push tire treads up spirit intersections at a brisk pace The light turns red after yellow because it becomes increasingly irritated The boy is somewhat a toddler geophysicists might agree his rock-plated foot soles and archipelago sized blood plasma donations differentiate him from most children his own age Warfare technology byproduct, his favorite class is Civics His report cards are written in the language of hollow earth theory planetary bark scroll, no, he doesn’t show his parents His teachers “Iron” and “Copper” have to be relocated from craterlands to semi-urban areas to get in touch with the boy Hard quarry sediment caked up at his quartz heels mandibles with dental braces, ghastly looking bifocals fingers supplanted in silt red enough to be liquid magma Assigning detention to tectonic boy is like sentencing the Pacific Ocean to an aqua curdling death dance - believe me, it’s been tried I was his guidance counselor at one point Homeland Security, in league with the Geologic Society asked the boy if he had any extraneous items to declare before they amputated some of his assets It appears tampering with his ligaments led the government to hit rock bottom - power politics and half-pipe hydroponics The end of an untelevised episode of Modern Marvels in lieu of nuclear winter’s adolescent pincers