7 Appendix

1. Author: C.S. Lewis Reference: A Grief Observed Emotion: Sadness Quote: " Part of every misery is, so to speak, the misery's shadow or reflection: the fact that you don't merely suffer but have to keep on thinking about the fact that you suffer. I not only live each endless day in grief, but live each day thinking about living each day in grief."

2. Author: C.S. Lewis Reference: A Grief Observed Emotion: Sadness Quote: " No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. "

3. Author: Cheryl Strayed Reference: Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar Emotion: Sadness Quote: " Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can't cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. It's just there, and you have to survive it. You have to endure it. You have to live through it and love it and move on and be better for it and run as far as you can in the direction of your best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by your own desire to heal"

4. Author: Philip Beesley Reference: An Unpublished Manuscript, December 12th 2019 Emotion: Hopeful Quote: " Instead of inert and dampening qualities, could soil offer a kind of precarious détente, a manifold that resonates and shimmers, where new forms could spring forth from older times and elder presences? The burials and deep earth that deaths seem to always invoke could bring a particular kind of comfort opposite of a halo which emanates outward: the completely dispersed and immersive living ocean--and-earthen fields of those who have died seem to now shimmer inward toward me, making inward-rolling waves, engulfing me, billowing and quivering, passing through my transparent skin and resonating within the tangles of my organs and my bundled paths. The unspeakable suffering and the unthinkable pain they each bore shimmers inside my body too, with such pressure and weight that it sometimes engulfs me completely. Those inward-swelling tides might speak of erasure, infinitely falling. Yet instead of horror the sense that they are vividly here inside and outside my own body offers the quietest kind of elation: I am living them. I can live them. I will live them."

5. Author: Anne Lamott Reference: n.a. Emotion: Hopeful Quote: " You will lose someone you can’t live without,and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp."

6.Author: Cheryl Strayed Reference: Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar Emotion: Sadness Quote: " Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can't cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. It's just there, and you have to survive it. You have to endure it. You have to live through it and love it and move on and be better for it and run as far as you can in the direction of your best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by your own desire to heal"

7. Author: Anne Lamott Reference: n.a. Emotion: Anger Quote: " But you can’t get to any of these truths by sitting in a field smiling beatifically, avoiding your anger and damage and grief. Your anger and damage and grief are the way to the truth. We don’t have much truth to express unless we have gone into those rooms and closets and woods and abysses that we were told not go in to. When we have gone in and looked around for a long while, just breathing and finally taking it in – then we will be able to speak in our own voice and to stay in the present moment. And that moment is home."

8. Author: Kristin O'Donnell Tubb Reference: The 13th Sign Emotion: Guilt Quote: " Whoever said that loss gets easier with time was a liar. Here's what really happens: The spaces between the times you miss them grow longer. Then, when you do remember to miss them again, it's still with a stabbing pain to the heart. And you have guilt. Guilt because it's been too long since you missed them last."

8. References