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WHAT YOUR MASK SAYS Hans Mackenzie Main gets up close and personal about what may be lurking behind the masks we’re wearing
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ace masks have become a part of everyday life, and like people, they come in a variety of shapes and sizes. And, although I haven’t read the headline in a fashion magazine yet, I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before we find out that, Your Mask Says More About You Than You Think. My personal favourite, from a spectator’s point of view, is what I like to call the Sideways Duck: a covering with a seam running vertically down the middle making its wearer look like a duck with its beak turned ninety degrees. “Adventurous,” might be the description you’ll see in Vogue magazine, or something along the lines of “the new left-ofcentre”. I like to think the Sideways Duck wearers are people with a sense of humour able to laugh at themselves in the mirror even in these times of uncertainty. The mask I wear is the same one you saw your dentist wear the last time you visited them: a light-blue number with white elastics and a concertina-type folding pattern. The specific blue doesn’t go with any of the earthy (read bland) winter-tones of my wardrobe, which surely would not go unnoticed by the fashion experts. “Mismatch much?” they might ask, or, worse yet, “Vaccinated or not, some people should simply never come out ever again.”
A growing trend I see in shopping malls and on the streets is to have some sort of a smile printed on your mask. As with the Sideways Duck, entertainment seems to be the focus here. “Keep the sunny side up,” these mavericks seem to say, regardless of whether you’re shopping, taking out the trash or living through a once-in-a-century pandemic. The model with a purpose-built valve is a curious choice. In this case, maintaining air quality reigns supreme, surpassing looking good by a long way. Not to stereotype, but I think, should someone do a survey, these mask wearers will reveal themselves to be by and large people who work in IT or, perhaps more accurately, gamers. These citizens take their well-being and around-the-clock comfort very seriously. When it comes to masks, they seem to say, playtime is over. And then there are the corner-cutters. The ones who tie a scarf or a cloth around their heads and call that a mask. (I’d like to add here that grabbing a mask you once used while spray-painting a bookshelf from the garage is not doing the best you can. It’s not what one would call, What the doctor ordered, and most certainly is not designed to protect you against a biological threat. Walk past the hardware store for once, Tim the Toolman, and head for the pharmacy.)
Only once did I use everyday fabric to protect myself against Covid, covering my face, I’m ashamed to admit, with my T-shirt. It wasn’t my proudest moment doing what people do when someone in the room has passed wind and I hope I never have to do it again. The judgement I felt rushing in and out of that shop to buy a book was intense. I didn’t even make eye contact with the bookseller. I just walked out and then basically ran back to my car. Fashion changes as the seasons do, telling us that this autumn something called “new utility” is in only to be replaced by “nautical” when the weather hots up. It’s been going on for decades as some styles come and go and others remain timeless. Luckily, the Covid pandemic is not timeless. We all know it will pass in time and we can all go back to walking around with our faces uncovered breathing in fresh air like nature intended. Until then, we have to keep on wearing a part of our personalities on our heads like upside-down sneakers and let the world in, if only a little, on what’s going on inside those heads. So, whether you’re wearing the latest Gucci mask or a garment from the Crazy Store, don it with pride and purpose and compassion, but, above all, don’t leave home without it. PM
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7/7/21 8:24 AM
