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Hey guys, issue #9 is here! Featering an interview with the lovely Canterbury boys, as well as A Boy Named Girl banging on about farm animals & tractors, so make sure you flick through & check those out. Facebook | Twiter | Tumblr

Also this issue we’re introducing the wonderful Van Susans, who are definitely a little different from the majoirty in our local scene, but definitely worth the listen.

Editor Zoe Blush Creative Director Vicky Webb Photography Robbie Candy Martin Hobby Jodie Shepherd Adam Coley Ben Hadden Abbi London Writers Ian Gregory Jodie Shepherd Jez Silcock Zoe Blush Adam Johnson Advertising Vicky Webb

Lots of love, Zoe Blush xo




Website Sam Detnon Want to advertise in WASTED? Want us to feature your band? Are you an aspiring Alt model? © Wasted! Magazine All Rights Reserved. Whilst every effort has been made to ensure that details in this publication are accurate, we cannot accept responsibility for such. Readers are advised to check listings information to avoid disappointment. Views expressed by contributors and advertisers do not necessarily reflect those of the editor and publisher.







Introducing: FIRST OFF, WHO ARE YOU? We are Van Susans, the up and coming 6 piece pop/rock band from Bromley (South East London), making noise all around our beloved London.

Our members are myself, Olly van Andrews the lead singer/ rhythm guitarist, Rob Dullaway percussionist, Ed Dullaway lead guitar, Tim Dullaway bass guitar, Olly Groome pianist/backing vocalist, Caroline Atkinson violinist/backing vocalist. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? We have come a long way in such a short time going from the sports hall 9 months ago to playing at the IndigO2 in the O2 dome last week (April 16th). If this momentum keeps up, then we have every intention to hit the big time. Everything is going really well, it’s

a lot of work but if we keep it all going who knows what the future holds. WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY DOING? With our EP coming out on May 23rd, we are currently pushing it to radio shows all over the country and are receiving a fair bit of air play. We are going on shows for interviews and acoustic live sessions, such as 107 Meridian FM and 105.9 Folkestone FM. We have been added to various radio playlists throughout the UK including Q radio. But have also received a few radio plays abroad including Butterflies radio in Miami, Coast FM in Tenerife, and Artist First Radio in the states where we

Photography by Martin Hobby will be doing an interview on the 12th May. Where are you going? We have a lot of gigs coming up, playing at the IPO festival Liverpool and London, where we will be playing at the legendary Cavern Club on May 23rd which we are treating as our Liverpool release gig for our debut EP. Then playing at Camden’s Dingwalls on the 26th May which we are treating as our London EP launch, for the Emergenza Festival semi final, which we are really pushing to win. It is an internationally held festival where the main prize is to play on the main stage at a festival in Germany. We’re also looking towards making an album

before the end of the summer, if everything goes to plan. We are currently writing more and more material every day and the songs are getting more and more creative, if I may say so myself. what makes you different? Having been influenced by such a variety of music from metal to jazz to pop to classical music. It all comes together to make a sound that can appeal to everyone. We have a wide set list that is easily adaptable to suit lots of different genre fans, having played to crowds of metal heads and not receiving a single bottle to the face, to having played a hip hop night and still getting the crowd going. We really feel we are of a style that will appeal to the masses.

We are heavy on the social networking front and vow to keep in constant direct contact with our ever growing fan base. We all take on the social networking front, and enjoy replying to our fans comments getting them all really involved with the goings on of the group. WHY SHOULD WE LISTEN TO YOU? Readers should listen to us as we are the most hardworking, innovative band on the scene at the minute, constantly pushing ourselves to new boundaries to achieve better and better performances and edging our creative writing to new levels. We strive to keep our fans happy through putting on shows that they will really remember, because at the end of the day all we want to do is be remembered.

Normally, I get cynical when a band has critics buzzing around it and a rapid ascend to stardom is beckoning, like a magical stairway to heaven descending from the ether. Often there’s the stink of label promotion about it; either that or the NME trying to tell the kids what’s hip today and trying to disguise the fact that what we’re actually listening to is vapid dross with all the depth of a teaspoon. But the Van Susans, who are on such a steady rise to prominence as we speak, are a bit of an oddity in today’s rock music scene. The fact that they’re not a metalcore band with floppy fringes, or an indie band with chequered shirts and ironic lyrics, would probably be enough anyway to guarantee them unique status. In fact, as one spin of their ‘We Could Be Scenery’ E.P. proves, they are a fascinating cocktail of well-crafted, folksy roots-rock that’s very different to what you’re likely to hear doing the rounds on the circuit. It’s not often a band disarms my cynicism so deftly and swiftly, but the Van Susans are one such band. Opener ‘Cha Cha Bang’ is a curveball, as it’s the most rocking and intense of the five tracks, with buzzing guitars bolted to an emphatic chorus. Nevertheless, in amongst the crunching electric chords, the organic, emotive heart of this band beats strongly, and is allowed free reign on the remaining tracks. It’s rare in modern rock music that reviewers get to talk about such things as layers and textures, but the Van Susans work hard to craft a multi-layered music-scape, with pianos, strings, harmonised vocals and acoustic and electric guitars all flitting in and out, and sometimes all combining at once. More impressively, no matter how many instruments are in play at any one time, subtlety and balance is retained, and the sound is never overwhelming to listen to, which makes a change from the often over-produced fare we are more used to. Penultimate track ‘Plans’ is the zenith, a glorious celebration of their powers of warmth, melody and craft, coming off sounding like a anglicised version of Nell Bryden - and considering how much I love Nell Bryden, folks, that’s a monster complement. In conclusion, on this evidence, the Van Susans are one of the first bands in years to fully deserve the hype that they’re receiving They’re a refreshing blast of imagination and soul in a music landscape gone stale, and a band to really believe in.

AFTER CHASING THEM TO THE END OF THE EARTH & BACK, WE MANAGED TO CATCH UP WITH THR GUYS FROM ‘A BOY NAMED GIRL’ & ASK THEM WHAT THEY’VE BEEN UP TO LATELY. SO BOYS, GIVE US A little bit of background info: who ARE YOU & WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO? Steve: We are A Boy Named Girl, a pop punk band from a pretty rundown part of Kent who have relentlessly been trying to prove ourselves as a band. We’ve played along side some awesome bands and worked hard to put out an EP we can all say we’re proud of. We see nothing but progression for the future. Describe your sound to a first time listener? Chris: [Tunes] that will rape your ears off with catchy melodies and lyrics.

a t a y e k r u t a e l o "we once st " e v i l a s a w t i s e y festival, AND


Photography by Abbi London

You recorded at Stake Out Studios which has also seen the likes of DissolvedIn, Paige & You Me At Six, what was that like? Steve: It was great! The studio itself is actually situated on a tiny island which makes it all the better for the experience of recording. It really feels like while you’re there you are shut off from the rest of the world (except for maybe the odd boat rowers passing by and a few friendly ducklings!) Working with Chris Coulter (Rueben, Exit Avenue etc.) was amazing he constantly pushes everyone to get the best of out of you as a musician. Andy: But even though your being pushed its still quite a relaxed place, which works well for us. Chris: My only hatred for it would be the world’s loudest tractor that randomly drives around the island and will run you over if you don’t get out of the way. Did you come across any particular difficulties whilst recording? Steve: I think it’s very true when people say you are your own worst critic, I think the hardest part of recording is getting a final mix everyone loves. It can also get pretty stressful on your brain! Hearing the same drum beat

getting mixed for 3 hours is enough to send any human mad! Chris: Lyrics are always a tough thing to decide on because once you’ve recorded them that’s it. Little guitar parts and drum fills, stuff like that you can always change about live without people noticing too much, but if people know our lyrics then we change them live I’m sure they would notice. For a long time we just wanted to write lyrics about ducks. You’re set to be releasing a new single later on this year, can you tell us a little bit about that? Andy: The plan is to release one this year and another maybe early next year. The twos songs we plan to release are “Dimes the limit Martini”, and “Today is Tomorrow’s Yesterday”. Not sure what order we’ll release them just yet. Steve: One of the songs has a bit of a different feel to it in terms of guitar dynamics. We are also hoping to release our first video too, which is very exciting. The chorus will stick in your head and hopefully be really annoying! Do you think there is any change in sound between the likes of “I’ll Be Fine” & “My Best Mistake”? Do you think you have matured at all as a band? Andy: We have defiantly matured a lot and I think we all much better musicians as well, which helps a lot, where trying to make our songs a lot more technical hopefully we’ve done that without changing too much. Steve: We like to pride ourselves on doing what WE love to do. I think the new stuff will show nothing but positive progression. Chris: It’s hard to try and stick to one type of sound that’s why we are releasing 2 singles, one being heavier and one more chilled out. We like to play both styles of music but still try and keep our own little unique sound about it. We have definitely matured we were all so young when we first started and we have all grown as musicians and progressed.

Is there a lyrical difference between ‘Second Place Heroes’ & the new single? What are your lyrics usually based on? Steve: Yes. Lyrics I believe are a very personal thing. I can’t say that we particularly focus on one issue throughout our music; we like to keep things personal but written in such a way that it can be interpreted and related to on a mass level. Who have been your favourite bands to play with & why? Steve: Call Off The Search in particular are great guys and always a blast to play with! We have played along side some great acts and some that are really going places, the best bands to play with are the ones you get along with. Andy: Personally I like playing with Small Team Of Experts they’re just awesome and I’m totally not biased towards them in any way. You’ve obviously spent a lot of time together, ever wanted

to mash a fellow band mate’s face into a blender? Steve: No, but that’s a great idea! It’s like any relationship, you have arguments and get fed up of each other all the time but its nothing a bit of Barry white and some dimmed lighting cant fix. Chris: Things get heated sometimes and we have creative differences but all is forgotten and we love each other really. If you could tour with any selection of bands, who would they be? Steve: The Jackson Five! But I think that dream died before i was born. Chris: If i could tour with Hit The Lights that would make my life it would be so amazing to support and tour with them, we all met them last year at Slam Dunk there really great guys Andy: Would awesome to tour with Blink 182 or Fall Out Boy, could name loads more but it could take a while.

Summer’s coming, what are your personal summer anthems? Andy: It’s all about festivals in summer so it most goes around who’s playing at like Slam Dunk or Reading. Chris: Party rock anthem lol, I’m really into dance atm. Steve: I tend to kick it old school when the summer rolls around, early Blink and NFG does it for me. What’s the craziest/most embarrassing thing each of you have done on stage? Steve: Erm... a pretty offensive dead celebrity joke got said probably a bit too soon once. I lost microphone privileges that day. Andy: I don’t remember having any personally except maybe some pretty weird faces, but the best moment I remember was at our first YOG gig, Craig forgot about the fact that it was an underage gig and asked into the mic “whos getting fucked up tonight?”

the whole room just fell completely silent, was quite awkward. Can you tell us any big ABNG secrets? Chris: It’s not so much of a secret but we once stole a turkey at a festival n yes it was alive. We did return it before leaving though. If you could be any other local band for the weekend, who would you be & why? Chris: Weather the Storm there fairly new and haven’t played many gigs but Im friends with them all n there all great guys and secretly i kind of miss playing metal. Steve: probably someone quite far removed from our genre, just to learn a few new chords. Andy: yeah I think I’d go for something random. Maybe someone like popes of chill town, there not very local but Paul smith (my third leg, LSP) is slowly brain washing me with ska.

If ABNG were an ice cream flavour, what would it be? Steve: chocolate chip. punchy and sweet with a bad ass crunch! If you had to go into the dragons den & sell ABNG, how would you go about it/what would be your strategy? Steve: Im thinking cover version of Levi Roots sauce song. Andy: They’d probably just laugh at us i doubt we would come out with anything good to say. But the money would help, maybe we should just do it and then answer. What is the most significant thing about A Boy Named Girl to date? Steve: That somehow, where still friends. What’s your best memory to do with ABNG? Chris: Joining the band Andy: There have been loads of things over the last five years or so, be hard

to narrow I think. What’s next on the agenda? Steve: bigger better shows, a new single and a video! Andy: also where gonna have merch soon that’s been a long time coming! Anything you want to plug? Steve: Yes, check out our youtube channel! there’s some fun acoustic stuff on there. Andy: yeah where playing first days of freedom festival on 17th july everyone should check it out theres loads of great bands playing!


BEAUTIES Name: Miss Malice TELL US THREE interesting facts about yourself: 1. I had plastic surgery on my ears when I was 16 because I was bullied about them being big. 2. Seriously on the brink of being Satanic, the years of attending Sunday School didn’t really work out. 3. I don’t leave the house without make-up on. I have my insecurities too! What made you want to get into Alt modelling & how did you go about it? It has been a totally unplanned journey. When I was younger I was very interested in the idea of being a fetish model, loved everything about that industry & always thought that it would never be possible. I was inspired by so many Alt Models growing up, Masumi Max, Lady Morgana, Bianca Beauchamp to name a few. I started modelling for friends University photography projects and it kind of took off from there. I realised I had a talent and started to do more and more until I had a good amount of photos for a portfolio. I made a Facebook page (back in the day when hardly anybody did) and started networking my ass off. Here I am today! Now Masuimi Max has modelled Latex I have designed! I’m living the dream. Your dream job? Any of the following: Full time Model, Catwalk Make-up Artist, Stylist, Tattooist, Music video director, owner of a Fetish shop. Damn I want to do so much in life! What is your favourite band/style of music? I absolutely love music & am very open minded to lots of genres. My main genre would be metal; black, death, tech etc I have a massive obsession with “Cradle Of Filth”, hearing their music takes me back to who I am. They really bring the evil twisted imagination out of me! “A Day to Remember” is another of my top favourite bands, truly awesome lyrics & energy in their music. On the other hand I am in love with anything I can dance to, you can’t really dance to metal, if you do you’ll end up not being able to move your neck for a few days. So the other side of

my music taste is Rihanna, Katy Perry, Tinie Tempah! I like good bass. I do have a little listen to Russian folk metal too from time to time. What is your current favourite song? That’s a VERY difficult question. I have lots of favourite songs, I couldn’t just pick one! Currently I’m addicted to “E.T” by Katy Perry feat. Kanye West. Its such a sexy song and makes me want to dance around in my pants. A favourite Cradle of Filth song would be “Lord Abortion” the lyrics are amazing, it’s all about necrophilia. What was the best gig you’ve ever been to and why? Parkway Drive. Need I say anymore? I was very drunk but remember it all so clearly, such a powerful band and such a powerful crowd my boyfriend got a beauty of a black eye in the pit. Carnifex was intense! They played a really good set, I was right at the front moshing my little head off. What is your favourite film? Titanic. I know there are far cooler films to be obsessed with, but I seemed to choose this one. I feel like a massive nerd when anything Titanic related comes up in life, as I know so much to do with the history of it. I’m sure if past lives exist I was on that boat. I can’t get enough of it! On the other hand though I think Memoirs of a Geisha is the most beautiful film ever created & Bram Stokers Dracula is a masterpiece! Describe a typical night out WITH MISS MALICE? I usually spend hours getting hair, make-up, outfit decisions right. Start drinking early at home so it’s cheap! Although most nights out are cheap for me as I am a massive light weight. I spend most of my night out dancing very inappropriately with friends. It’s awesome. Usually get home and eat something very random and think it tastes amazing in my drunken state. What is your favourite alcoholic drink? I have lots of fun trying different cocktails when I go out, they are so yummy and really do the job. I’m also a big Vodka fan, has to be posh stuff though. If Im looking for a cheap night out then its Cider all the way! It’s the Cornish in me, big cider drinker. What (else) do you do & what do you enjoy about it? I draw a lot always have done, since the days of using Crayola. My drawings are mainly sexy women, pin-up style and clothing designs. I really became interested in becoming a tattooist but chose to study Fashion design at Uni. I absolutely hated my course and quit after passing the 1st year. That hasn’t stopped me from what I love doing though as this month I collaborated with Violaceous

Latex and helped design a new collection! I absolutely love seeing a design come to life and being modelled by models that inspire me. People assume I model full time, but I work as a care support worker for people with Learning disabilities. I really do enjoy my job and its very rewarding; it really keeps me grounded alongside modelling. But this June I am moving to London, the big city to further my modelling and start a career in Make-up! What is your most embarrassing

moment to date? There has been one thing that springs to mind, but I couldn’t possibly let people know what it is. So instead I think

the next most embarrassing thing would be when I was younger I seemed to wet myself a lot in very random places, Disney Land, traffic jams, school assemblies. I know everyone has a problem with this when they are young but most of my younger life’s memories involve me being in a puddle somewhere. I’m very happy I don’t have this problem now. What is your claim to fame? Let me see, I’ve never met anyone famous, a few band members here & there but no one hugely famous. Claim to fame for me is probably model related, being on various clothing/latex websites, featured in magazines such as Bizarre, Glamrock, Kerrang! But I think my highest achievement /“fame” moment is being featured in erotic publisher Goliath Best Photobook’s new publication “Latex Fashion Photography”. It’s released in Europe and US over the next few weeks. It features the top Latex Photography around the world and I am in their alongside some of the best Latex models/ photographers. That’s a rather special thing for me. Where you think you’ll be in 5 years’ time? London part time make-up artist/part time Model. Travelling all over the world for adventures & photoshoots! What has been the best year of your life & why? Well last year was very kind to me for my Modelling getting noticed, lots of work for that coming in and found the love of my life! But I really

miss the years of being in College. I felt so free with no worries in life and had a group of guys who were my best friends, we went on all sorts of adventures and have ridiculous video footage to remind ourselves of the stupid immature moments we had. I think everyone has that moment in life where you feel lucky having the company around you, having no life pressures and stress’s. I try to focus on the future now and what that holds, I’m excited for it!


Name: Chaz Barnes Locaton: You can find me in The Court House pub in Dartford. TELL US THREE INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT YOURSELF: 1. I cant have things beginning with C, Not all things obv but there are a few; cheese, caffeine, chocolate, the list goes on. 2. I have a line of hair on my left knee, I don’t know why, its not due to scars or anything... FREAKY. 3. When I was 16 I worked on a holiday camp and had to dress up as a bunny rabbit, I got in a lot of shit at that place, best not to say what and why haha. & WHAT IS IT YOU ACTUALLY DO? I do Pyro technics for Bullet For My Valentine, its a bit of a dream come true, being on the road with a band that I listened to when I 1st got into rock music, they are really nice guys! I love it because i’m on the road, getting to see new places and meet new people, iv met a lot of famous people through it, A Day To Remember, Bring Me The Horizon, Atreyu, The bassest from The Darkness wich is AMAZING hahaha. Also Bullet are such a nice bunch of guys, Padge an Moose invited me out in London for a drink a while back and I remember this moment because it made me laugh so much, as Padge asked us if we wanted a drink and he turned to walk through the door to the bar, pushed the door which was a pull door and carryed on walking straight into it and pretty much colapsing on the floor, twas FUNNY. AS. FUCK! SO WE HEAR YOU’RE IN A BAND, TELL US A BIT ABOUT THAT? Well I’m in 3 bands now! My Biggest one being Subversion, We are a Tech melodic metal band, trying to push it forward, I play keys and vocals, we all love it! Also in a band called BearTrap, just loud drunk shouty music, I do lead vocals and a bit of guitar, its FUNZ. Also I have just been recruted by Mr Martyn Kingsmill to be in his new project called Martyn Kingsmill and the Family Band. Its Folk/Country music, i’m doing Percusion and harmony vocals! & BEING PART OF A BAND, WHAT

ARE YOUR TOP THREE MUSICAL INFLUENCES? Atreyu, without them I defo wouldn’t be doing what I do! Ludovico Einaudi, he is an amazing composer! And yes i’m going to say it. . . S Club 7! i’m going to get myself killed!

were a fair few people there! that’s one of the worst moments I think, altho I delt with it well . . . Best year of your life: this is a tough one, I can tell you the worst year, my 17th year was shit, dno why it just was.

What is your favourite style of music? I have such a big mix, from pop to punk, metal to dubstep, hip hop to folk!

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM JOB? Let me think, I have a pretty amazing job as it is to be honest! I think it can’t get much better.

So who would you say are your favourite band? Of all time it has to be System Of A Down ftw. & What is your favourite song? At the moment there’s a lot of dancey tunes that I like, but also anything with feeling. Don’t tell anyone but I really like ‘Ghost Of You’ by MCR. Shit I shouldn’t have said that. What’s the best gig you’ve ever been to? There are a few that stick in my mind! When I saw Gallows at Rough Trade East record shop, or when I saw them at Dingwalls in Camden. I also really enjoyed the Rolo Tomassi/ Jonny Truent/ The Fall Of Troy gig at the Kingston Peal, Any small show with fucking Heavy music! DESCRIBE A TYPICAL NIGHT OUT WITH MR BARNES: I’m a pub man, go to the local, get a bit drunk, try and convince someone to have a curry with me, that type of thing, but I like clubs, there’s nothing wrong with getting really fucked up and dancing like a dick for 5 hours! & WHAT ARE YOU USUALLY DRINKING? I am a cider man at heart, I like the new stella one. But I also like desparados mmmmm.

WHAT IS YOUR CLAIM TO FAME? I have a few to be honest, my fave would have to be meeting Dave Grohl at Download, he is my IDOL!!! Him and Taylor Hawkins watched me get a tattoo done, I had to look like a real man! erm my not so fave was meeting Mr Motivator from ITV at the Marthon when I was like 7! He gave me a signed picture and I said, “Is That Really You” and he said “No, Its My Twin Brother” looking back on it now he was a bit of a dick! and many MANY more inbetween WHAT HAS BEEN THE BEST YEAR OF YOUR LIFE SO FAR? Ok best year would have to be 2009, 1st year I went to Download Festival which I now pretty much LIVE for, last year I even sold my Motor bike just to buy a ticket! That’s dedication is it not, altho last year I have to say was amazing aswell, meeting all the people I met, plus towards the end of the year my band started going places, and I finaly got some good looks (Dibatable) WHERE DO YOU HOPE TO BE IN 5 YEARS’ TIME? That’s hard, I could ether be rich and famous, or I could still be doing what I do now! Luck of the draw really, I hope its the 1st one! If not I’ll move to Germany or something, just for LOLZ.

ANY EMBARESSING MOMENTS YOU CAN TELL US ABOUT? We have YOG in the park to thank for this one, after Subversion’s set time was cut to 3 songs I though, G=Fuck it, i’m gonna go mental, on the 2nd song I went so crazy I through myself off the stage backwards onto a cymbal stand, ripd my shorts open infront of EVERYONE and as I remember there

Photography by Martin Hobby

Think of Canterbury and what immediately springs to mind? A cathedral? An archbishop? Maybe even the birthplace of piraty actor bloke Orlando Bloom. Probably the first two, but for me sweet rock band Canterbury are fast heading to the top of the list (their Facebook page already has more likes than the aforementioned city!) Incredibly still unsigned, the four piece rock band hailing from the Surrey/ Hampshire area have have been hard at work since their inception in 2005, and after a full UK and Ireland headline tour last year, as well as supporting You Me At Six on their UK tour, they show no signs of slowing up. I managed to have a quick chat to Canterbury’s Farnham born bass player, Mr Luke Prebble about the scene, upcoming shows and general non cathedral related subjects. Hey Luke, how’s things? You have had a hectic 2010, what would be the highlights for you? I’d say the highlight to the year would be our headlining show at the London Underworld during our tour in October. It was the biggest headlining show we have done to date and it was one of those nights where it felt like everything came together and we were being rewarded for all our hard work. But the whole tour was immense. Canterbury formed in 2005, who thought of the band name and was this your first band? The band name has tonnes of different names, and we can say it was a combined effort between James and I. It wasn’t our first

Y R U B R E CANT band, we had a band called Lucky For Some before Canterbury was born. You have a sold out show at Borderline in London with FFAF and The Blackout (13th Feb). What can fans expect from this show, any surprises? Well, unfortunately now they can expect no Blackout, but we are hopefully gonna play some new songs at the gig, so we are personally really looking forward to it. And everyone thought FFAF were gone eh! Following on from that, what is the most out of control show you have played that sticks in your

mind more so than others? The London show I mentioned above was mental, but i will never forget every show we’ve ever played in Ireland. And High Wycombe too deserves a mention. Your debut album ‘Thank You’, is available for free download via your website. What’s the thinking behind that? Well the initial thinking was that we were getting pissed off sitting on a recorded album for so long without release, so we kinda wanted to just leak it ourselves. That moved on to thinking it would be better for us to actually officially put it up for download, and the free option just opened up opportunity for anyone anywhere to get hold of it, thus getting our

name and music as far as we could on zero budget, it was cool. And you are currently working on the second album. What news of this? How does it compare to Thank You? Its the cliche thing to say, but the heavier parts are heavier and the pretty parts are prettier. We are very excited to release some new music to the world for sure.

to reach out to a shit load of people who may never have heard of you. We were lucky in 2010 to experience a fair share of both angles.

2010 was an epic year for you guys, how awesome is it to play sold out headline shows in comparison to supporting bands like YMAS? They are 2 completely different experiences. Headlining you feel proud and humbled, and opening up for a band in those huge rooms is more of an honour and a chance

What are your present views on the rise in the independent music scene? And how do you feel that it will stand in about 5 years from now? Will it be stronger than ever, or will it remain idle? Everyone knows that the internet has been an incredible and now

What’s the most embarrassing song on your ipod? To be completely honest, im not embarrassed by anything on my ipod, although I don’t have much music on there at all!

vitally important way of getting bands music heard. Which means so many more independent bands and music groups can be easily accessed by so many people and you see swells in the rise of it. But like everything on the internet, it gets saturated, and new ways have to be thought up to be seen as a cut above the rest. I have no doubt that new ways will be introduced to continue these swells in activity and exposure. But it all really boils down to people continuing to write sweet music. So yeah, it will be strong as ever in 5 years. The rise of all ages shows becoming more and more popular with the new generation of music fans, is there any advice or sources of inspiration you would like to pass on? It’s really important that people of all ages get the opportunity to go and see live gigs. For a lot of people its vital in their music education whatever scale that takes place on for them. Obviously it should depend on the show, if people are gonna be doing stuff and saying stuff that would be inappropriate for younger kids to see then there should be restrictions, but just a straight up rock gig, everyone should be allowed into them. Fuck it, i’m gonna ask this. What would you rather be attacked by, a dozen duck sized horses or one horse sized duck? If they were actually attacking me, shit, probable a dozen duck sized horses, ducks are pretty small. I reckon you could kick them away quite easily. A horse sized duck would be terrifying. Thanks Luke, anything you want to plug before you dash off, new album, world peace etc etc? Go and grab yourself a free album.




the ivy leaf bar, sheerness, 23/24th apr

Sunshine, a camera, the flowing of alcohol amongst friends and the return of some local favourites, what more could a girl ask for?


With a weekend of live music ahead of me, you must remember that anything I say is my opinion. I do not intend to insult or indirectly persuade. Having said this, we must acknowledge that the fun began when Tank Trap came out to play. They know they’re good, but they have the right attitude and do not come across as being cocky, or trying to be something they are not. A debate amongst friends prompted the question of who they are most like, Rage Against the Machine or The Red Hot Chilli Peppers. Some interesting names spawned from that discussion. Tank Trap have a range of distinctive styles, a good vibe, an undeniable energy and compulsively pleasing to watch, notably when vocalist Ian Day produces a harmonica. ALWAYS a show favourites and will remind me of the time I saw Black Stone Cherry at Brixton Academy, but that is a different story.

This undeniable energy was certainly followed and exceeded by one of Sheerness’ finest, Wires Faulty. It is safe to say that they have outdone themselves to date, and even the crowd were sweating after their performance. Wires Faulty are always full of energy and know how to get the crowd moving. With the 6+ monitors on the main stage, they had the best sound they’ve had in a while, and though crowd interaction is not a regular trait of the boys, it was less apparent this time. To compensate, there was a definitive focus on their playing, and it worked for them. They way in which bassist, Chris Redman-Holland went straight into “Hit the Ground” with no introduction, gave that opening riff its well deserved edge and recognition. Now, “Let’s f***ing have it!”

Words courteous of Saturday’s headlining act, Floors and Walls. A band with so much hype, I wondered what all the fuss was about. Until this point, I had never heard of Floors and Walls, but judging by the crowd (one that left me with no room to move), they must be good. They had one of the most enthusiastic crowds yet, with even members of other acts that night enjoying the atmosphere. Floors and Walls are VERY catchy, and since Saturday night I have found them playing over in my head at insignificant moments of my day. The vocals given should have sounded out of place in comparison to the rest of the band, but it strangely worked. I’m not sure how they pulled it off, but they did. The way they fed off the crowds energy and the crowds return of lyrics word for word, proved this. Floors and Walls seem repetitive at times, but with an essence of freshness, which is an odd combination. You can almost predict what was going to happen next, but it’s hard to turn away. Floors and Walls “came to destroy”.

SUNDAY After a late night, and a collapsed boyfriend, I finally got to sleep. I knew Sunday would be a good day when walking through the alley early afternoon and hearing a cry of “Sweet Child O’ Mine” from female fronted SiiDE-FX; one of five female fronted acts to perform at The Ivy’s weekend, but enthusiasm is shortly followed by disappointment and I found this with one act amidst Sunday’s line-up. So, I have a Confession[s] to make. I did not enjoy this band, at all; hence the need to amuse myself with wordplay. Confessions must be doing something right though as they had a small, yet reasonable crowd for the time of day. “Vocals” were provided by Joe Wigg, and at one point another guy who initially I thought was a member of the crowd. Perhaps he was who knows. For me, the harsh tendencies of the vocals overpowered the instrumental elements, and it could have done without this. Especially when the vocals given by the guitarist worked better for their sound. Flat at times, but the band did have a lot of energy, which is a good thing I guess? Finally, something completely different...

“Are you watching Avenge Thee + Naime?” “Of course I am”. These were the words heard in the minutes before the next act of the day. Another new band and an experience ahead of me, Avenge Thee + Naime took to the stage. Kind of. Notorious for continuous experimentation and never playing on the designated stage, Avenge Thee + Naime caught my attention. The lack of guitarist (who is believed to have had an unchangeable work situation) and two drummers set face to face was an edgy move. Enjoyment came from watching the drummers mirror each

other with passion and the inability to sit still, but also the vocalist’s connection and drive to make the crowd part of the performance. They had a heavy and at times “dirty” sound; the energy of AT+N was compelling, and their inadvertent need to make a statement interesting. After staying to watch Dirty Vibes and a few others, the time called for a break in the [disappearing] sunshine, and remarks of “we’ll go back in for Callous” were present among many.

Callous were off to a rocky start when technical difficulties proved a stress for their drummer; fortunately for Callous the crowd were supportive throughout the whole issue and did not tire with the wait, they seemed content with the rest of the band providing their own means of entertainment, but it just so happened that the quickest way to resolve the technical matter was for

Shatterpoints bassist, Sandy, to step in and endure the set sat in front of the bass drum. Needless to say, the enthusiasm of Callous’ drummer, Mike, picked up enormously once the guys could really get their teeth into the set. And what can I say? They were one of the best acts at The Ivy Leaf’s Big Weekend. With technical riffs, the lack of shoes from the bassist, and the passion and commitment from the band made it hard to tell whether the crowd fed off the bands energy, or vice versa; either way it made for an intimate performance. The sweat was dripping and the atmosphere was promising.

The crowd ventured to the main stage to see The James Cleaver Quintet play, but half the enthusiasm seemed to have been left behind. If I remember correctly, the crowd had to be asked to move closer to the stage. From this very trait I could tell the favoured acts of the weekend, While The JCQ had a lot of energy there was nothing particularly enticing for me and I took that time to wait for one of my favourite acts to set up. Shatterpoint. Now apparently, if you like Elvis then you’ll like Shatterpoint.

These were the words conjured from the alcohol influenced mind of my boyfriend. I would instead say that if you like sweat and emotion you will like Shatterpoint. There was no doubt that Shatterpoint were received well by the crowd, and to date they also outdid any performance I have ever seen them play. A mention must also be given to the entertaining Quo-esque movement of the guitarist and bassist at simultaneous moments. Then with 5minutes left of their set, and in defiant rock n roll tradition; Shatterpoint played a 9minute song. In

about 5minutes. This particular number, “Falling Away”, was performed with Ben [Then the Wave Came]. During a Shatterpoint practice earlier that week, I saw the guys endlessly rehearse this arrangement in order for it to be note perfect for Sunday’s performance. Suspense is built within the track, as the pace fastens half way through and that’s when the strength of the vocals come through. Ben noted he had a lot of fun playing this track, and it is now one of my favourites. You can connect to the song and undeniably hear the emotion in the vocals.

With just a few things left, the words “get involved” were my cue to leave during Seven Year Kismet’s set. As a relatively small female at the front of a crowd where even the vocalist’s hair amounts to more than my being, I didn’t exactly feel safe. The large crowd SYK drew in was not going to work well with me caught amidst the “pit”, that I imagine inevitably formed. The band were loud and heavy, but to a likeable degree. Where Confessions fell, Seven

Year Kismet excelled. I did not leave because I wasn’t enjoying the Kismet set; I left so that I would be able to write about it afterwards. Having been a band for a while, they have an unmistakable popularity which saw energy and excitement being thrown about.

“.E..L. V

if you like


then you’ll like Shatterpoint...

The same energy and excitement was present when One Day Elliott took to the second stage. Having last seen the band play more than 2years ago when The Wyvern Hall in Sittingbourne was a functioning music venue, I too was excited for this performance. The build for suspense was given with the classical inspired [recorded] intro, but once they kicked in hard beats and repetitive riffs were at the ready. The vocals finally came through and secured everything in place; for the response from the crowd you would have thought that nobody had seen One Day Elliott play in about two years. Again the lyrics were fed back word for word, and a “welcome back” seemed in order. With my heart pounding and bones shaking I knew sitting next to the mass of monitors and

speakers was probably not a good idea, nonetheless I wanted to see firsthand the extent to which ODE made an impact on the crowd; notably within the last song where the crowd went pretty crazy. The impact was close to being “goosebump worthy”, if that’s even a term. With minutes to spare, the guys of One Day Elliott reminded the crowd the headlining act, Tyrannosaurus Alan, would only play if the crowd remained excitable. Needless to say they did. The energy was high, the brass instruments were out, and the dancing shoes were on. Tyrannosaurus Alan are extremely popular, and it seems almost ironic that I had not seen either of the headlining acts perform until this weekend. I questioned whether I had been missing out, and in all honesty I thoroughly enjoyed the set, but not in a way that made me regret not catching them live before. Having said this, I can’t find a bad word to say about T-Alan, the crowd said it all. While they are not everybody’s cup of tea; their experimental tendencies and catchy sound proved they are a lot of fun. There was a lot going on, what with the dancing and the jumping, and the building of human pyramids. The crowd were eating out of their hands, and the enthusiasm was to a max. The same again next year?

Photography by Robbie Candy and Jodie Shepherd, Wordsby Jodie Shepherd

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set to reach the top, and they certainly have the dedicated fan base for it. We Came As Romans then… A difficult band to place a genre on, a tricky band to name any similar sounding competitors… What they are for sure is bloody fantastic. The amount of energy that the 6 lads have is infectious, their sound is punishing and in this small venue, the

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another typical night in Camden, music fans strewn about the pavement surrounding The Underworld, excited for tonight’s show. Amidst the anticipation and noise of touts trying to flog tickets, it’s easy to see that this is a gig that has been anticipated for quite some time. After waiting for what seems like an eternity to get through the doors and down the steps we’re finally inside the venue, just in time to catch This Or The Apocalypse. The boys seem to be genuinely ecstatic about being on the bill for tonight’s show, a refreshing change to see bands grateful of the chance to play with bigger names. The bands short but sweet set certainly fills the audience with energy and a sense of how wild the night is about to become;

Good old Underworld, doing away with barriers by the stage! Up next are US crossover act The Word Alive. Straight from the off, frontman “Telle” Smith commands the crowd, and the general presence of the band on the stage is truly impressive. Thanks to the fabulous blend of vocal brutality and harmony, and some blistering guitar work, theirs is a set that never gets boring. The band are definitely one to watch in the coming years, as their unique sound and intense live show set them apart from their rivals. It is hard to think of a band which sound like The Word Alive, and that is a great achievement for such a young band. Miss May I come with a live show which can only be described as explosive. Picture a small room with a stage in one corner. Now picture the band’s vocalist declaring that

the packed out crowd must now perform 100 (Yes, 100) stage dives. In three minutes. I’m no mathematician, but that’s a stage dive every 2 seconds. That is a lot of stage diving. The crowd did it. That is the effect the lads have on a room. When they aren’t playing top drawer metalcore (I’m riffing) or commanding the crowd to do ridiculous things in the name of entertainment, they remain chilled out, down to earth guys. Drummer Jerod is especially relaxed after the set, saying that he had an awesome time. With the release of their latest album Monument, the band are looking

intimacy really adds an extra level to the performance. The twin vocal patterns intertwine brilliantly and extra credit goes to the unmanned macbook, which churns out samples when needed, keeping the live show as true to the band’s recordings as possible. This is a neat touch and isn’t seen too often with bigger bands. That pretty much sums up We Came As Romans tonight, doing it their way and kicking ass while they do it.

GAMES news Picture the scene: legendary punk rockers The Descendants arrive in London for a two-date tour. First night doesn’t go to plan - actually, it nosedives into embarrassing farce the very second lead singer Milo Aukerman’s voice decides it doesn’t want to work any more half a song into the set. After shambling through the show using whoever happened to be standing near the stage at the time as impromptu singers, the band inevitably postpone the second date the following night. So what do you do if you’re the highly-rated support band on such a tour and you suddenly have nothing to do on a Tuesday night in London? Obvious, really - head over to a tiny South London bar, gatecrash an open-mic night and have a big ol’ punk rock party. As you do. And when the announcement was made that a certain band called Teenage Bottlerocket would be making their début London headlining show in a venue with a stage roughly the same size as a council house bathtub, I knew immediately that this was not to be missed; this show had legendary ‘I was there’ status written all over it.

And boy, was I right. You have to pity the bands playing the open-mic night as already planned - they were treated to the bizarre scenario of playing to the largest, but probably the most apathetic, audience they will ever face. A room packed high with bemohawked punkers and leather jacketsporting rockers foaming at the mouth for punk rock action and being treated to the sight of, in order: an awkwardlooking emo band (whom anxiously thank the masses for not throwing things at them), followed by a petite woman covering Mariah Carey (complete with window-shattering wails) and some random experimental metal jams that serve only to bemuse even the band themselves. An utterly weird spectacle that only serves to emphasise the lastminute, underground feel of the show.

Clearly the biggest story of the month is the huge PSN crisis. The basic situation is that Sony have been fucked by hackers so badly that they have had to put there services on hold for the last 2 weeks or so. As I write this article I realise that it may be back online by the time you read it. So for those who

But finally, at 9:30pm sharp, the rather clueless MC introduces some band called ‘Teenage Rocket-Bottle’, who proceed to squeeze onto the stage and fly into action for their set, speeding out of the starting gates at 100mph with ‘Skate or Die’. And from there they never look back; roaring at top speed through a nonstop, runaway roller-coaster of pure, old-fashioned punk rock fun, while the baying mob go, frankly, absolutely insane. Frenzied pogoing, frantic slam-dancing, spectacular stage-dives and chaotic crowd-surfs, all present and correct for every minute of every song. The manic energy is unrelenting, crashing back and forth between the band and the crowd like tsunami waves. It’s an incredible spectacle to behold, with the guitartoting front-men of Ray Carlisle and Kody Templeman unable to stop grinning like hyperactive teenagers as they merrily orchestrate the carnage, tossing out one glorious sing-along anthem after another. Seriously, I’ve never been to a show where EVERY SINGLE SONG has people rabidly hollering the choruses back at the band. Rise Against, AFI, Cancer Bats, Billy Talent? Forget it. None of them could manage it. But these four punkers from Wyoming make it look effortless. Make no mistake, folks, this is not particularly complicated stuff. Pretty much every song has at least one chord sequence that could’ve been lifted from the Ramones’ or Green Day’s back catalogue, and a large amount of the songs seem to blur together under the same four-to-the-floor drumbeat and four-chord hooks, with a couple of exceptions; ‘Fatso Goes Nutzoid’ in particular cranks the slam-dancing up to hyper-speed levels for ninety out-ofcontrol seconds. So yeah, it’s simple, not particularly original, and not particularly deep either. What it is, is energetic, passionate, emphatic, and absolutely brilliant fun from start to finish.

Photography by Adam Coley Words by Adam Johnson

And you know what? In the largely stale musical landscape of today, that may be enough to stand out. Too many bands nowadays seem to view ‘fun’ as either something that’s somehow beneath them and their fringes, or an excuse to goof around and make penis jokes like we’re all 11 years old. And similarly, too many bands view ‘punk rock’ as an excuse to splurge out some clichéd slogans and be deliberately shit. Tonight, TBR provide a timely reminder as to how fantastic punk rock music can be, with a stinging cocktail of pop hooks, melodies big singalong choruses infused with raucous, driving energy. And that reminder turns out to be one of the greatest gigs this author has ever had the pleasure of experiencing.

don’t know here is what you should have received. You should have been treated to one months free Playstation plus service along with a whole host of freebies on top. In all fairness Sony did what they had to do to protect us, the consumers. So when they are giving us all of these free downloads I think thats pretty admirable on Sony’s part.

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It always looks a bit ropey when you’re doing a video dunnit? You’re trying to get hold of everyone, get everyone together, BM this shoot was a little more lively than others? Cos we’re in Gravesend NW Yes! BM And Gravesend is where the party’s at... There ‘aint no party like a Gravesend Party... [Laughter] Erm, no it was fine, it was

good, the energy of the room was the energy of the song if you want to get wanky about it. Yes it was difficult to control, Yes it was rowdy, Yes! It was going to be messy, but that’s the song. NW here here! AND WHAT WAS THE NAME OF THE SONG? NW the song’s called ‘A Pint and a Fight!’ WHAT’S THE SONG ABOUT? NW It’s about my life in Gravesend really. And I guess all the other people that have spent time in the North Kent area. Or anywhere in England really. Anywhere in the

world really, but especially in Britain. I find that a pint and a fight is rather apt, for a Friday or Saturday night really. What about your Tels? (Terry, the manager of The Red Lion) a punch up after a few beers? Gravesend in general, like yeh, even if you don’t go out looking for a fight, sometimes you might end up in one. I know we have a British flag up there, but all we’re trying to do is... the British flag isn’t just a racist punk thing... we want to get away from that... BM Skinhead! I had worries, when you e-mailed me and you were like ‘Here’s a song’.

‘Pint and a Fight’ ‘I want it to be really English, really English’. I had these visions of the 70’s and Dr Marten boots. TERRY I don’t have any punters that are like that BM Well it’s not really punk is it? It’s just an image. Like… well BNP and that BM (laughs) Ha fun times! ‘Hi, Nick Griffin, how are you?’… (under his breath) Massive, Massive wanker (laughter)

Turner is here!’ ‘You all right, mate? (High pitched mocking) ‘Yeah I am fine’ BM: Oh yeah he does but this doesn’t need to be about Frank Turner, it’s meant to be about these guys. W! Oh yeah, of course, but it is part of it, and it has obviously been used to your advantage. BM I mean yeah, it’s one big circle of lovely people… (Interrupting) NW: Sorry mate. I’ve got to be honest though; literally none of you have any idea who Frank Turner is. We haven’t managed to claw

NW: Fuckin’ quality saying (laughter) BM That’s how it seemed to be yesterday rather when we filmed Frank at Brixton Academy and when I said to (someone 9:17) will come and do that; she was like, ‘Absolutely’. And he came down and he wasn’t like ‘Come on, I’ve got go, I’ve got go’ He was ‘Right, what have

people out of the woodwork, if you ask any of the people there ‘Who’s Frank Turner?’ They’ll be like (confused) ‘I don’t know’ BM: It’s…(above the raucous) Honestly, Frank’s lovely, I try to be nice to people, it’s lovely and it’s fab working with those people, but I don’t have time to be working with twats when there is lots of them in the media, but most of the time it’s doing favours for friends, So if you look after your friends they will look after you.

I got to do’ He was buzzing about it. It took him three takes of the same thing, DE Exactly same thing. Without going in to any details. W! INTRODUCE YOURSELVES NW: Paul! He’s our drummer W! Paul. Just hiding NW…Three of them are here! (Laughter) W! And there is Shelly and Tadge NW Or Nathanial Wood W! (Laughs) BM Please put it down (Laughter)

Photography by Ben Haddon

tewxt wext tewxt BMwexty Whattexty did you think of wexty the It was a ploy then? BM: No Frank Turner is going texty wext(to tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt song? W! magazine) to be here wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty W! It was catchy, very catchy W! Is he? wextvvvvv tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt BM: Cheers BM: Yeah we filmed him, shot wexty wext Itewxt wextyeven texty wext NWtexty Yeah, mean, tewxt wextythe texty wextare tewxt wexty him yesterday though lyrics all like W! He was here earlier Ahh, texty wext tewxt wexty textyeach wext tewxt ‘Go outside and kick you see, that was sneaky. I wexty texty tewxt texty wext other in!’wext It’s not likewexty err…‘Go tewxt wextyand texty wexty was wondering... outside killwext eachtewxt other!’ NW: People were going ‘Is BM Yeah, at wexty no point texty wext tewxt textytoday wext tewxt Frank Turner going to be have we wext filmedtewxt any one killing wexty texty wexty texty wext anyone tewxt wextyelse texty wext tewxt wexty here?’ No, I never said he was going to be here on the NW No!tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt texty wext day. I said he was going to be BM It’s all been very nice, very wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext loveable. It’s just meant towexty be in the video, if you like him. I tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt said to him yesterday people a wext fun reflection on texty a typical texty tewxt wexty wext tewxt thought you were coming, British it?wexty texty wext wexty textynight. wextIsn’t tewxt NW British night ain’t tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty and he went ‘Oh did they, yeah, because I’m not’ the word! is a texty standard texty wext tewxtItwexty wext tewxt (laughter) In the studio, he’s British…A Gravesend night!texty wext wexty texty wext tewxt wexty BMwexty (meekly) tewxt textySorry wext tewxt wexty like the man to come and do that. Like…he looked happy to (laughter amongst group) texty wext tewxt wextythe texty wext tewxt do it didn’t he man? NWtexty Yeahwext it istewxt about my texty life wext wexty wexty round ‘ere. Butwext yeah… tewxt wexty texty tewxt wexty NW But if you’d here wexty texty wext tewxt wextylived texttewxt for like seven years wouldn’t texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt youtexty writewext a song likewexty I’ve just wexty tewxt texty written? wext tewxt wexty texty wextvvvvv tewxt BMtexty Mmmm I would wexty wext(retorts) tewxt wexty texty wext write several songs like you’ve tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty just (Laughter al tewxt texty wextwritten. tewxt wexty texty wext around) Involving all sorts of wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext things. tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty W! SOtewxt BEN,wexty YOU’RE THE tewxt texty wext texty wext DIRECTOR? wexty texty wextHOW tewxt DID wextyYOU texty wext GET INVOLVED IN THIS? tewxt wexty texty wext tewxtARE wexty YOU FRIENDS... OR?... texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt BM: Well I know Nick from a wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext video I shot about for Frank tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty Turner three or four months texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt ago and helped me out of a wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext spot, so he called me up and tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty BM: I spoke to him before said ‘I’m in a band I need a texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt director, Will you come and hand; I spoke to him last wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext do it? And I said ‘ Yes, Nick! Of week. When I was in there tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty with him and I said ‘I’m doing course I will because you’re texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt lovely’ and that’s literally this video for Nick on Saturday wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext because Nick is lovely and he been it! tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty NW: That was the whole went ‘Yes, Nick Whiteoak, he texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt is the loveliest man I know’ conversation wexty texttewxt wexty texty wext tewxt BM: That pretty much was That’s a genuine quote there you go. So yeah…so he said wexty wext tewxt it. texty AND then I got awexty copytexty of wext tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty the track and I turned up to ‘If he wants me to look out the door then I am more than texty wextvvvvv tewxt wexty texty wext film some crowd stuff. And tewxt wexty into textyawext tewxt wexty happy to do that’ I sloped day of filming DE: We were sat in Nick’s texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext stories and crowd stuff and tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext bits and pieces. And it has Mercedes, which he found tewxt wexty wext tewxt wexty (laughter) and he got a phone been a lottexty of fun. call on his phone, which was texty tewxt wexty wext tewxt W!wextJUST ONE texty THING, wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext WHERE IS FRANK TURNER? most certainly free. And it was tewxt wexty textyhe wext ...apparently, wastewxt goingwexty to like ‘Yeah, no worries, see you in a minute’ (high pitched, texty tewxt wexty texty wext tewxt bewext here? mocking) ‘Oh my god, Frank wexty texty wext tewxt wexty texty wext

DE NATHANIAL WOOD (Laughter) NW Okay, I’m Nick the Bass player DE Dave, guitar, Vox M Mat, Accordion W! Cool and how did you guys form? NW Yeah, yeah, we were working Reading Festival. And we were sitting on stage watching Flogging Molly and

I thought ‘Fuck that’s exactly how I would like to live the rest of, my life, In like, listening to that everyday - maybe try to write music like that.’ So then I’ve tried to get a band together, thought about how to get an accordion player. And then our guitar player at the time, the day we try to start the band he mentioned it and someone

behind him overheard he went ‘Need an accordion player? I know someone who knows someone who knew someone once who played the accordion once’ And he was like did you get his number and Dave’s just like ‘Yep, got it! And I’ve just finished chatting and phoned him up’. Materialised. M Disturbed me, in the pub,

having a drink, prick. (laughter) M ‘Do you want to join a shit band?’ Like… (laughter) NW It was nice when I rang him I said ‘Where are you?’ ‘I’m in the pub’ ‘Oh, he’s so perfect’ W! WHO ARE YOUR INFLUENCES?, obviously Flogging Molly.

NW Yeah Flogging Molly, Frank Turner. Yeah Frank Turner man. Flogging Molly started it. Then I,. Then I…on the same day, actually! I heard Frank Turner I thought what’s this geezer going to do with an acoustic guitar amongst all these punk bands. The he came on and you know when you get I’ve only had it a few times, once with Flogging Molly, where you hairs stand on end BM Sometimes you’ve got meningitis (Laughter) M Oh mate, that was bad NW You know those times at festival where you get so excited that you shiver a

little bit you think ‘fuck, I am so happy!’ That was it; Frank Turner was playing. I wasn’t going out on the pull out there. That killed it BM And Napalm Death! NW Yeah Frank did that and I thought ‘Fuckin’ hell, between Frank Turner and Flogging Molly I would love to make a band sound like them’ W!ANY LOCAL INFLUENCES? NW (Wondering) Local bands that have influenced me? NW Life Sentence! (Group agreeing) Yeah life sentence are one Well two of them are, yeah, but Life Sentence are gonna be huge DE They are going to be. He was in Life Sentence! M Dude the first time you watched them? BM A little part of my soul died, you know the first time you watch ‘Two Girls One cup’ and you realise part of you will never comeback

W! WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR THE FUTURE? NW Err yeah we’re gonna record all the songs that we have written, in the next couple of months, init? The next few months. Starting with this one that we’ve just done the video for. What you’ve listened to is a demo me and him recorded in his

W! Is it all right? M It’s fine, it’ll work W! WHAT IS AN AVERAGE DAY IN THE LIFE OF CALICO STREET RIOTS? M An average Day in the Life. Late! (Laughter) Late, is all I can describe it as. Being told you are going to be picked up at 11 and you get picked up at 2. That’s the average day I would say. And breaking a door handle, that happens so often, it happens all the time, it’s always Tadge as well.

bedroom, init? And in the studio they’ve got in the bottom of their garden, which is epic. DE So we’re aiming for the whole album by the end of March. So hopefully we’re gonna get ten tracks and turn around. W!HOW DID YOU ORGANISE THE SHOOT? M Well Nick works at the Brixton Academy with Frank Turner. That’s how he got into doing Frank Turner’s shoot for his last song ‘I Still Believe’ W! How well do you think it went? M Oh a lot better than I thought it was going to go. I mean when we got down here, five minutes before we started it was about 5 people sat in here, one them was my Mum FACT. I was really happy with the response when someone threw beer all over my very expensive iPod

18:33 Other band member Nathanial Wood that is. P Nathanial Wood breaks door handles! Fact W! Do you want to go over that? P Well I think there has been about four or five occasions. We have two brothers in the band, so obviously arguments ensue over absolutely nothing, as in who is wearing the nicest hat? Today Dave won over Nick. Ermm but there always late. There’s so much enthusiasm saying we’ll be here now, I’ve got to drive to Bilericky to grab some police jackets, and you think ‘Brilliant it’s 2 in the morning why are you telling me this now? We’re leaving at 8. Awesome! Get a phone call at ten be there in 20 minutes, right then ok, I’ve got up at 8 in the morning, there’s a lot of that going on. Other than that the enthusiasm is unrivalled by any one I’ve ever met

W! DO YOU ALL HAVE DAY JOBS? P Yes. We’re all teachers, it’s good we’re all teachers it’s allgood. In one sense aren’t we all teachers? (Laughter) Nick and Dave both work for visual illusions who do the massive screens you see at festivals When you are watching a band. So I occasionally go along and set up the screens and do some Dj-ing and filming and stuff of bands, Mat is genuinely a teacher he teaches at a secondary school, M Primary school, one of those male primary school teachers. P Also known as paedophiles. M Also known as paedophiles! P Nathanial Wood, we’re not sure M We’re not sure he’s ‘selfemployed’ P Basically when we say are you all right to come out tonight he says ‘No, I’m working’ we then find out he’s been playing Call of Duty on his XBOX 360 M For hours P He does nothing WHAT WAS YOUR FAVOURITE GIG THIS YEAR? M Wales, where we headlined Bayfest. W! Anything that made it stick out? M It was an insane 2 days. Nick! You’re better at this. Wales-sum it up? NW Why was it so good? Because it was the first time in the band, there was no one in the club. You know usually there’s that one person you know in the crowd, the whole place was full of people we didn’t know. Aw fuck, straight from the (hums intro) it went off and we kept it going for an hour. The bands before us we’re epically fucking good! Is this going to go badly wrong? They were so good all the bands before us. But yeah we got on stage and it was the best gig ever and they loved

us back P A problem was tardiness. What time were we meant to get picked up from that gig? M Around about 6 O’clock in the evening P What time did we get picked up? M We left at about 4 in the morning! W! WHAT WOULD YOUR IDEAL LINE UP FOR A GIG BE? M Napalm Death. Ermm Hendrix, Elvis, The original Beatles line up, Jesus Fucking Christ. Nick! P Please don’t say Frank Turner again N Red Hot Chili Peppers that would be the best gig ever W! WHAT ABOUT LOCAL BANDS?

N Mad Dog M Yeah man N My actual, actual favourite local band ever were Sum of Nothing. They were fucking nuts I absolutely loved them, I thought they were the best band ever. They were a fun band and their singer, Sam, was funny as hell N Floors and Walls P They are not local N Have you heard of Floors and Walls they are shockingly good W! SO HOW DO YOU THINK THE SHOOT WENT? NW Yeah, I mean they had beer poured all over each others heads and they were still running around. That (slaps hand) if everyone was

like that then it would have been even better D Did you see him get hit in the back of the head with a Budweiser bottle? NW Who did that? D You did. That was on top of Tadges’ cab, it was Ian’s bin and everyone texted him and went ‘WEIGH!’ W! And when Nathaneal fell over D NATHANEAL (The band join on shouting Nathaneal) W! I honestly don’t know his real name M No that is his real name, Nathaneal, He calls himself Tadge W! WHY DO YOU CALL YOURSELF TADGE? T It’s a far too long story P Literally it’s abut something really boring and long T Tadge is much better M Nathaneal Wood is better W! I think Nathaneal is better T Ok, Nathaneal, Nathanal, Tin Tadgel, Tin Tadge, Tadge , There you go that’s the quick version of that story M Keep it as Nathaneal Wood W! Cool NW Ok here’s a question for your magazine, what is the most popular pub name in Britain? Look it up on the fucking internet W! It’s not the Red Lion? M It is the Red Lion NW No it’s not! It’s ‘the Bell’. I looked it up today! W! SONIC or MARIO? NW Fuck! That’s too hard! M It’s not hard, Sonic NW I was going to say Sonic but then I love Mario Kart, man that’s the shit M Mario Kart, now you are talking about Peach and Bowzer and all the others that’s not Mario NW But I much prefer the characters in Mario, fuck it Mario! Cant wait to see the video, should be out on the usual networking sites soon! (see links) W!


Pretty exciting here as we come about a brand new game and a brand new genre. The main ‘gimmick’ if you will is the people of LA Noire. In a nutshell L.A.Noire boasts the most detailed facial capture system ever used in a video game. So much so that the game makes you decide on whether or not you believe someone, just from the expression on their face. You essentially drive around Los Angeles solving crimes and chasing criminals. Don’t get me wrong initially this does sound as though it has been done about a million times over but in all honesty it’s a completely new experience that has blown my socks off. Rather than going for the dated GTA style of gameplay, L.A.Noire gives a much more strategic approach. You go to the scene of a crime, look for evidence, find suspects, have gunfights and car chases, but all the time keeping a sheer sense of realism that I haven’t seen since Heave Rain on the PS3. The only issue I had was after playing for about 15 hours I did start to find it a tad repetitive, but for the first of it’s kind it’s a bloody good attempt at making the game of 2011.

Brink certainly has style. It has a unique look to it that done well could have been amazing but unfortunately it isn’t. The graphics are very average with the added laggy texture loading and low quality surfaces. Bethesda have promised a day one online update to sort out the graphical problems but what good is that. The one thing I want out of a game is for it to work the second I put it in my console. The gameplay itself has its ups and downs. It uses a SMART (smooth movement across random terrain) system which is basically where you hold down a button and gain the ability to free run over obstacles, up walls and so on. This is pretty much the best thing about the game. The actually missions itself are incredibly repetitive and the shooting mechanics are slow and dated. Overall it’s a very average game with an average story, average visuals and average gameplay. There might be something here for the hardcore online gamers but I can see this game leaving many people disappointed.

So here we are with a brand new zombie map plucked straight out of the call of duty escalation map pack. Its your usual map of strategic zombie bashing but with a whole ton of added features. The first thing you notice is the sheer size of the map, its absolutely gigantic. It’s pretty much the biggest map ever in a COD game. They have added a few weapons this time like a random weapon that when shot at a zombie, turns them into a human. They have also thrown in a sniper that fires highly explosive rounds that have about a 5 second delay. This time round the map seems to have a large focus on sniping with lots of high up sniping points for all your head-shooting needs. The map also features new ways to get around, such as a catapult and a zip wire to fire you across the map. The game also features a Hollywood cast aiding there vocal talents and likenesses to the game such as Danny Trejo and Sarah

Words by Peter Willson

drunken gamer preview Visuals 10/10 audio


Gameplay 9/10 Life



Visuals 5.5/10 audio 6.5/10 Gameplay 7/10 Life



Visuals 9/10 audio


Gameplay 9/10 Life



December last year we were treated to one of the tastiest teaser trailers of all time. Now we have some solid details and here they are. Explain mass effect to me, and barrels. This will allow you to be far more diverse with your fireI'm new. arm gameplay. Shepard’s skill trees will be far Mass effect is a role playing, third more detailed than before allowperson shooter that combines a unique mix of action and strategy. ing for a Sheppard that will 100% Every action has a consequence unique, no Shepard will be alike. and your roll determines how the They have fixed the really annoying gameplay feature where to get over story pans out in the sequels. an object you had to first crouch behind it, now its going to be a much Tell me the story! easier fluid manoeuvre. It seems to be that the combat sysMass Effect 3 starts with Comtem itself is pretty much the same mander Sheppard facing a trial for as was in Mass Effect 2 but with limthe events of number 2. The trial ited details only time will tell. is cut to an abrupt stop as Earth is attacked by the Reapers. For those of you who don’t know the Reap- Is that all you have? ers are a race that show up every 50,000 years to basically try to de- Yep, that’s pretty much all the information that we have at this mostroy the galaxy. Anyway moving on, a raging bat- ment in time, which is annoying as tle takes place as Earth is lost to I’m pretty much any fans reading the invading force. All hope falls to this are dying to hear more. Don’t the hands of Shepard as he roams fear folks, if you guys hang on until space in an attempt to unite all the E3 in June we are pretty much cerspecies to save not just whats left of tain that Bioware will be releasing more information then. So be sure Earth, but the entire galaxy. The other detail of the story is to check out the E3 coverage in next that the corporation Cerbarus that months WASTED! Sheppard worked for in Mass Effect 2 have decided to turn against him Release date and platforms? and try and track him down. There is no clear release date as yet Surely there must be some seeing as how the game has been delayed until 2012. Bioware have cool new gameplay features announced that they are hoping to this time round? get it out by the end of the financial year so expect it out anytime Well truth be told there isn’t much between January and March next in the way of information here but I year. do have a few facts to share. As for platforms, they have gone Weapons will no longer be remulti-platform with this one so exstricted to certain classes and you pect it out on 360, PC and PS3 from will be able to customise them with day one. certain attachments such as scopes

Anticipation rating

BURNing on a scale of ____ to ____

If you see a group of people sitting on the floor and you want to clean, kick the shit out of them If you see a group of people, let’s say, a few young women and men (and some quite frankly elderly looking people) sitting on the floor with their hands up, (insinuating non violent intentions) and YOU, want to CLEAN UP a city centre because of possible football celebrations in the next few days, and you CAN’T MAKE THEM MOVE WITH WORDS, then what I suggest is this: beat the fucking shit out of them (especially the old ones, and the females, definitely children if possible) with batons while you hide behind huge riot shields. What? Is that not a fair thing to do to human beings who are peacefully sitting on the floor holding flowers, singing songs in a festival atmosphere, protesting as is their right to do? A Spanish commenter on YouTube wrote “they attack our camps with the excuse that they want to clean the square… we want to clean our democracy”. I understand what he’s saying, but I’d say they are protesting for democracy; notice how I didn’t say “protesting for a better democracy”. There has to be democracy in the first place in order to clean it. You can all look up the definition and then come to the realisation that it is not what we live in today, and it certainly doesn’t seem to be any different in Spain. It’s rather worrying that the title to the piece in the Guardian was: “Spanish protestors clash with police over clean up”. What’s more worrying is the way they post a video which clearly shows the

police hitting innocent people with batons, amongst them a young lady holding no weapon but a camera, a man and women who looked in their 60s, and a young man who quite clearly has a wound that’s drawn a lot of blood, and yet the Guardian still think that title is an accurate one. I think my title for this innocuous piece would have been more suitable. My sister is in Barcelona at the moment and she has never been a politically involved person, but I’d say she has a pretty good sense of right and wrong. She was shocked by the things she saw the police doing to protestors, and if we take the labels away from this; she was pretty shocked at what she saw PEOPLE doing to PEOPLE. She informed me a couple of days ago about the protesting (none of which had been mentioned in any news I had read here) and explained how there was a peaceful festival atmosphere with music and friendly people. Then the authorities came to “clean up” and surprise, surprise… things kick off. Stop me if I’m wrong, but hasn’t similar things happened here and all over the world? Power and authority is always illegitimate unless it proves itself to be legitimate. Chomsky, talking about authority, said something along these lines: the question we should always ask in our minds is why should I accept it? It’s the responsibility of those who exercise power to show that somehow it’s legitimate.

If I see my granddaughter running into the street and I grab her arm and pull her back that is an act of authority I think I can justify. I believe the kind of authority Chomsky is prompting us to assume is illegitimate is the very kind we can see happening in Spain right now. The kind of authority we see over here all the time. Or maybe we choose not to see it? Maybe we are desensitised to it? Maybe we’re unaware of it? Oscar Wilde said that the worst kind of slave owner is one that is kind to their slaves. I think the worst kind of slave is one that doesn’t realise he’s a slave, and probably for the reasons Oscar Wilde was hinting at. Maybe we don’t realise how much we are taken for mugs, oppressed, and used because we are too ENTERTAINED. Being a football fan, I know how easy it is to get distracted by things that don’t really matter; Barcelona football club may win a trophy, but what about the people on the streets of Barcelona who are trying to win something that actually means something? It’s rather disconcerting, what we, as the public, prioritise, find acceptable, or what (as I have stated above) we are distracted from. It’s shocking how submissive and at ease we seem to be with illegitimate authority; our own police, our own government. Why should we sit back and do nothing when human beings batter other human beings into submission? When our own armies ravish foreign lands, dropping bombs from nimbus hideouts, killing innocent people? What sort of man ignorantly does what he is told simply because it is “the law”? The law should be challenged; if there was a law saying “you must kill seven little boys on Thursdays” would you comply? What sort of man feebly does what he is told, watches on while men and women, young and old, are beaten with batons, and does nothing about it? I think I am that man. I think a lot of us are, and I think we better change because it’s shameful.

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Issue 9  

06/06/2011 Issue 9 is here, & it’s rather a happy issue this month! We introduce you to the likes of ‘Van Susans’, not your average on the l...

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