The Kingdom
“It’s a lot to consider, the absence,” she says. “Nothing but self in the dark.”
“We have got to hang out,” says Phoebe, smiling at Jay. I watch Julie fold her hands across her stomach again.
“Y-yeah,” I let the statement hang in the air, against my better judgment. I’m struggling to pull together something else, something to do her thoughts justice, when she speaks again.
“Definitely, for sure. You coming out on Friday? Dermot Beach,” Jay says. He has a band of flesh between his tan and the shoulder of his sleeveless shirt that’s trapped between skin tones. He looks from Phoebe to Julie and back.
“We should go get breakfast.”
***
Phoebe West picked up Julie at 11. Julie snapped her head to me, expectantly. I slung my towel over my shoulder and pulled myself over the lip of Phoebe’s green Jeep into the back seat. Phoebe looked from Julie to myself then back to Julie, then smiled at me pleasantly. I nodded and grinned in return, not quite sure what to say. The sun was glaring overhead as we drove. Phoebe was talking to Julie about the summer fireworks in a few weeks. She’d occasionally glance back at me, but never to talk to me. I sat as still as I could, jostled about in the back of the Jeep with pebbles, fir needles, and empty beer bottles. The roads back to town curved and winded, never giving Phoebe the chance to speed, though I heard she loved to. When we got to The Seyward Street, Phoebe was laughing to Julie about something from prom. There were already one or two cars parked in front of the cafe, the Jeep towering over beaters and top-down sports cars. As the vehicle’s rumbling engine choked, I heard a burst of static. There was a radio set up on a weathered stool on the patio, buzzing along with the chirruping summer bugs.
“
“Oh, I don’t know. Hopefully!” says Phoebe. “I don’t think so,” says Julie. “Ah, come on. Just try it,” Jay pushes. He smiles at Michael and Michael laughs. “Just try it,” parrots Phoebe, laughing as well. “Yeah,” says Julie. Everyone laughs except Julie and I. We still have our towels. Phoebe kisses Jay on the cheek as he slips from her grasp and walks toward his car. “I’ll see you soon,” he says to Phoebe, giving Julie a little wave. I see her nod. “Bye boys,” says Phoebe. Jay looks at me as he walks past, expressionless. Michael glances at me as well, like I’m an animal he’s never seen before.
“We never get to see each other anymore,” I hear Phoebe say. Julie opens the café door for her. “My work schedule’s so bad.” “Look who’s growing up,” says Julie. I grab the door and like being suspended over a starless hold it as she follows Phoebe inside.
It’s night, always poised moments before falling. I hate the anticipation of waiting to tumble. It’s oblivion.
”
*** I’m walking towards the door to the café, a few steps behind Phoebe and Julie. As they reach the threshold, Jay Creedwell comes out, laughing with Michael Bohl. Jay smiles at Julie and greets Phoebe with a hug. Phoebe puts her arms around him and Julie stands to the side, gesturing a greeting to Jay and his friend.
10
Fiction
“Fuck off,” Phoebe smirks. The interior of The Seyward Street smells like burnt coffee and croissant. We walk past several booths before Phoebe and Julie sidle themselves sideways onto the red cushions. Julie looks up at me as I sway indecisively, marooned, before she makes room. “What does it mean when a guy just wants to hang out with you and kiss instead of doing anything else, like, instead of going on dates and stuff,” says Phoebe. She’s playing with her bangs.