The Art of Resilience 14The Art of Resilience

By Monica Chard

Last year, more than any, was an immense challenge for most of us: job uncertainty, financial worries, illness and death, family tensions, isolation and loneliness to name but a few. Without going into detail, I have been through rather a lot of challenges myself. But I find myself looking at 2020 with positivity. Despite challenges, I have much to be grateful for. Resilience is about finding the glass half full, not half empty. We have a choice and we can change the effect that much negativity can have on us. I recently attended a talk on Zoom called “Practical Resilience in Difficult Times” which was put on by the Action for Happiness group, featured in this magazine last November. I was amazed to find that I was one of 2000 from all over the world joining this webinar. Dr Chris Johnstone who gave the talk has a background in medicine and psychology and is a specialist trainer in resilience and well being. He has written several books (Find Your Power, Seven Ways to Build Resilience”). He talked about resilience as “finding a better conclusion when you are in a bad place”, finding and referred to the challenges in life as being “informative dips” ie, what good can come out of this situation? What can I learn? It is all too easy (as well as natural) to find oneself feeling low, beaten and negative when facing our own challenges. But what if you focus on what you CAN do, not what you can’t? Focus on what you HAVE got, not on what has eluded you. Focus on what you can CHANGE, rather than concentrating on what you wish you had got. In terms of how to deal with those “downs” everyone has a different way. It may be walking, cuddling a pet, having a hug (if you are lucky enough to have a bubble with allows you to), gardening, nature, running, music or crafting, as a few examples. So many of these relate to the outdoors. During Lockdown 1 the appreciation of nature, birds and flowers was so evident. Sales of bird food rocketed in the local shops. I spent many hours watching blue tits coming and going in our bird box. Remember too that when you are in a bad place, things will change. Think of a time you were in a bad place, dealing with a negative situation. How did you cope? You did find a way out. As the adages say “This too shall pass”, “All shall be well”. In these times of Covid we have experienced a collective resilience in the way the community has come together. We have supported each other, gone out of our way to help those who are vulnerable, met people we may never have met before had circumstances been different. It gives us much to be grateful for. So life is hopefully going to start getting back to a kind of normal, with the introduction of the long awaited vaccine, but challenges remain and many of us will still be wishing for how things used to be. If you can learn to focus on what you have and what can do and make sure you enjoy it, you can get the best out of a challenging situation.

Chris Johnstone also provides some useful pointers on the website resiliencetraining.net where you can find resilience tools in a time of crisis.