Viewfinder: Volume 5, Issue 2 by Viewfinder GV

C H ABUSED R C H E D

volume 5 | issue 2

Camden Blowers Editor-in-Chief

Caleb Grizzle Co-Editor Karleigh Halpin People Editor

Viewfinder Staff

Ashlee Seaton Reviews Editor

Taylor Thomas

Arts & Entertainment Editor

Emma Mattes Campus Culture

Letter from the Editor Camden Blowers Editor-in-Chief Hello! Welcome back to the second issue of Viewfinder this semester! We hope you enjoyed the first issue as much as we did. This issue includes a variety of compelling topics, which will make you want to read more. You’ll read about the family history that runs deep throughout the Grand View baseball and softball teams on page 7. Turn to page 9 to read about the woman, Lucy Fitzgerald, who simply does it all. Lastly, Caleb Grizzle brings another hard-hitting story to the magazine about abuse within the church on page 13. Again, thank you for reading, and we hope you enjoy this issue!

Trevonte Diggs Photo Editor

Dallas Bryson Photo Editor

Erin Kim Cho Advisor

KC McGinnis Advisor

Cover Story

Find more stories from the Viewfinder staff at viewfindergv.com. Explore the impact of spiritual abuse and the patterns of abuse that can plague religious institutions on page 13. Cover Photo By: Trevonte Diggs

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Dear Evan Hansen | By: Carly McCoy Railroad Bills | By: Erick Villar

Candles on Tap | By: Blake Walker

The Yacinich Legacy | By: Taleah Smith

I Love Lachele’s | By: Taylor Thomas

Feeling SAD? | By: Caleb Grizzle and Danielle Castil

Churched and Abused | By: Caleb Grizzle

dear Evan Hansen Written By: Carly McCoy |‌Photo: Provided | Designed By: Dallas Bryson Dear Evan Hansen is an original Broadway musical with music and lyrics by Benj Pasek and Justin Paul. The 2021 film adaptation stars Ben Platt, reprising his role as the original Broadway Evan Hansen. Platt is the only cast member to star from the original musical. Amy Adams, Julianne Moore, Kaitlyn Dever and Danny Pino are other notable castmates. The film follows the same story as the stage version; socially anxious Evan Hansen has his life completely shifted when a letter turns into the final words from Connor Murphy, a classmate who finds Hansen’s note and ends up committing suicide. With the note found in Murphy’s pocket addressed “Dear Evan Hansen,” Hansen is deemed by Murphy’s family as his best and only friend. Now Hansen must navigate his twisted web of lies as he works through wanting to honor Murphy’s memory and becoming emotionally involved with his family. The movie starts off fast, immediately throwing the viewer into the story with the song “Waving Through a Window.” This is a sharp contrast to the opening stage version and threw me off as a viewer. It gives hardly any time for the audience to be introduced or establish any background on the characters. This is the movie’s weak point; unfamiliar audience members will be lost throughout various moments and find it conflicting to establish the basic story. Most notably criticized among the public is 28-year-old Platt, starring as 17-year-old Hansen. In a film dependent on replicating the high school atmosphere, it is obvious that Platt stands out in the wrong way against a background of high school aged actors. His theatre experience is also evident in comparison with his fellow actors and comes across too harsh. Platt’s facial expressions felt forced in comparison with the more natural reactions of his co-stars. Even though the original is nothing without Platt, I believe a younger actor would have been more suitable for the big screen. Those like Benjamin Levi Ross and Andrew Barth Feldman are considerably younger actors who have starred as Evan on Broadway and provide an age-appropriate perspective that highlights his struggles as a teenager. The film does not fall completely flat. I was highly impressed by the singing of some of the other actors who don’t dabble in the musical world. Kaitlyn Dever, who starred in

the 2019 film Booksmart, was a breakout star in this film and brought a lot of integrity and emotion to the character of Zoe Murphy, Connor’s sister. Dever’s version of the song “Requiem” takes a powerful stance in Zoe’s feelings about Connor’s passing and left me feeling vulnerable by her intense anger and grief. Another great moment in the film involves the song “Sincerely, Me” with Platt, Nik Dodani and Colton Ryan. Platt and Dodani’s character Jared spin a tale of lies while drafting fake emails to prove Hansen and Connor’s friendship. Connor (Ryan) appears in this number to act out the ridiculous notions the boys come up with. This segment was successful in being just as brilliant with its comedic timing as the play. It is one of the light-hearted moments of the film and acts as a nice break from the harsh reality of the story. An issue I had with this film involves the lack of chemistry between Platt and the other actors, especially Dever. Their body language and vague emotional expressions make it hard to believe in an intimate connection. Transitions into musical numbers were also a notable weak point. Song introductions felt unnatural and jarring; the previous dialogue didn’t ease me into the lyrics. It felt like the music and the movie were separate components that were forced to interact with each other. Sometimes the emotional quality of the song overshined in comparison with the simplicity of discussion between the characters. This musical to movie adaptation ultimately boils down to personal taste. I appreciate having this movie format as it gives me the opportunity to enjoy the story again and again without depending on seeing the stage version. The North American leg of the Dear Evan Hansen Broadway tour will come close to Des Moines during its three nights in Omaha, Nebraska, from December 28th through January 2nd. The movie may not satisfy the average audience. The emotional quality and beauty of live music is what makes the musical shine. The background set and the way the stage is manipulated is the best platform to tell the story. The acting is incredible with a strong cast of theatre experienced performers. When it comes to the movie, its enjoyable for its effort, but its weak points prevent it from shining like its predecessor.

Railroad Bill's

Written By: Erick Villar |‌Photos By: Dom Wright-Walton | Designed By: Dallas Bryson | Graphic By: Camden Blowers Railroad Bill’s Dining Car is an American restaurant located at 621 Des Moines St, Des Moines, Iowa. It opened in early 2018. They offer a classic breakfast and lunch menu throughout the day, as well as unique vegetarian and vegan dishes. Railroad Bill’s is owned by a mental health care company called Optimae Life Services. This company has multiple divisions which helps people with mental illnesses or intellectual disabilities. They also help people find employment and housing placements. Optimae Life Services works as well to provide community support with community integration services. They prepare people for the workforce, where they receive job coaching services and learn job skills. A delicious and inexpensive meal can contribute to the company’s purpose, which can help these people with disabilities listed above. Railroad Bill’s was built with an interesting interior that is shaped like train cars. This long, narrow environment makes you feel like you are inside a train. The staff provides great service, to make sure customers are well attended for at all times. Jake Leiberton, current manager of the restaurant, said they have been confronted with new challenges since the start of the pandemic. “This has been a big year for our evolution with everything that happened in the COVID-19. We were operating take-out only for a little over a year and we just reopened in early April this year,’’ Leiberton said. Its menu could be one of the best things about this place, because of its variety. They have omelets, various types of sandwiches and hash brown platters. They serve meals such as eggs, bread, waffles, fried chicken, steaks and more. You can also create your own platter. They offer many options, including breakfast, slingers, lunch and brunch specials. “We have an entire vegan menu as well as products that we can make substitutions with as for the gluten-free,’’ Leiberton said. He sources many of their ingredients locally from within their company. All of the bread they use is made at an Optimae bakery, and the company also owns a farm where they produce some of their ingredients. Another item that is popular is their own signature coffee. They roast their own fresh beans each week in the food production facility located in Ames. The business also has a food truck close to the Des Moines Capitol, which is open in warmer weather. Food truck season is over, but in the summer, they operate five days a week. “If we do get asked to do private events or things like that, we may open the food truck,’’ Leiberton said. The food truck is expected to reopen in March 2022.

Candles on ap

Written By: Blake Walker |‌Photos By: Sarah Rush | Designed By: Karleigh Halpin | Graphics By: Caleb Grizzle It is no secret to anyone in their 20’s and 30’s that when you are looking for a good outing to mingle with friends and/or co-workers, a bar is the top place to be. There is nothing better than the tastes, sights and sounds of barhopping with friends. But what if you were able to give a night, all to your smells? Introducing Candle Bar DSM, located on 130 5th St. in West Des Moines in Valley Junction. Home of the one and only candle bar in the state of Iowa, as their website says, “…bringing custom scent dreams to your car and beyond!” Chloe Bratvold does it all. She is a wife, a business owner, and more importantly, she is obsessed with candles. Despite growing up in a family that has past business ownership experience, Bratvold said, “this was not the plan, at all.” She attended Kirkwood Community College for her culinary education and then moved to Kansas City to do some private chef work. It did not take long for her to realize it was not the field she wanted to be in. After some time in Kansas City, she moved back to Iowa in the heart of the metro. It was then she realized her love for candles. She wanted to bring a cleaner product to the candle-verse. “That really is one of the biggest reasons I’m doing what I’m doing now,” Bratvold said. Candle Bar DSM opened in November of 2020, right in the middle of the global pandemic. “It was definitely scary, but it was one of those things where I wanted to open in March, but that’s when everything went bad so I kept pushing it back further and further ‘til I could not wait any longer,” Bratvold said. She talked about some of the challenges of working through the COVID-19 guidelines in a business that is so hands on but felt that they have handled it well. “We sanitize everything constantly. I think one of my bigger expenses is disinfecting wipes,” Bratvold said. Candle Bar DSM uses 100% U.S. grown soy in their scents. Soy gives off a cleaner, more natural smell compared to normal candle scents which usually just use crude oil. In some ways, the scents you would be smelling could be compared to secondhand smoke, despite it “smelling” elegant. Bratvold talked about how growing up in such an agriculture oriented community like Eagle Grove, she really wanted to use Iowan-grown products to support the Iowan farmer. “In a way, I almost wouldn’t be here without Iowa farmers, and I’m really grateful for what they do,” Bratvold said. So how did the idea of candles and bars mix in Bratvold’s mind? Well, it is quite simple. “I think the biggest thing is, we as women are always looking to do something different socially and be able to have something that can be usable,” Bratvold said. The process of making candles while at the bar is also remarkably simple. When you walk in the door, you choose a jar based on the size and price-point of your candle. The jars come in assorted colors, glasses, and ceramics. “The prices range from $27 to $40, and those are all inclusive

prices. If you pick the $27 jar, that’s how much it costs to make it,” Bratvold said. After picking a jar, you go through the bar’s 85+ fragrances and pick the top four that you like the most. Be mindful that with the change of every season, they add 10 new scents. “We hope to have 150 scents, but obviously things get discontinued, so we won’t always have the same, but we like to add on,” Bratvold said. Once you have your top four scents, one of the candle baristas will help you narrow it down to two or three. “You don’t have to mix fragrances, but that’s the fun part,” Bratvold said. They then help you mix the scents together and take you through the journey of making your own candle. The complete process of putting them together takes about half an hour. Once you are finished, the wax cools down for an hour and a half. Depending on the size of jar you chose, this process could be longer or shorter. “Some people pick them up the same day they make them, or you can pick them up whenever it works best for you,” Bratvold said. The whole “bar” aspect of Candle Bar DSM goes almost unnoticed in the candle-making process. The workshop area, where you put the candles together, is made to resemble a bar-like counter with barstools. While they do not serve alcohol, you are more than welcome to bring in your own beverages to drink while making your candles. Despite being the owner, Bratvold is the main worker of her business. During weekdays, it is just her behind the counter. On weekends, when the store has its busiest hours, a couple of her currently five part-time workers come to help her out. “I’m currently looking to expand and hire a full-time manager, along with more part-time workers. It’s a great job for college students who could work weeknights, but most weekends, and you make great tips considering you’re working in a bar,” Bratvold said. Bratvold holds a positive attitude regarding the future of Candle Bar DSM. “A business-like tone we have is a wholesale,” said Bratvold. This means that other businesses can come and make a candle and put their logo on it. Candle Bar DSM would then make a certain quantity of that candle so the other business could sell it to their customers. This gives Bratvold peace of mind that they do not need to always be worried about the number of people walking in because they have such a solid backside to the bar. Her next step is to expand the business by creating another location, while still holding strong with the metro. “Des Moines is a weekend destination, and we want to be a part of that for years and years to come,” You can find more info about Candle Bar DSM on their website, www.candlebardsm.com and on their Facebook and Instagram pages @CandleBarDSM.

The Yacinich Legacy Written By: Taleah Smith |‌Photos By: Ashlee Seaton and Provided |‌Graphic By: Camden Blowers |‌Designed By: Ashlee Seaton Grand View University is known for its wide range of athletic programs and the history surrounding each program. When new athletes come to GV in the fall each year, many of them are hoping to make a “family” with their new teammates. There is one family in particular at GV that is well known for its love and decades of dedication to the university and its programs, the Yacinich family. The Yacinich family is known for their involvement in GV’s athletics over many generations, even today Lou Yacinich Sr. and Lou A. Yacinich have been making an impact on the GV baseball and softball programs. Lou Yacinich Sr. better known as “Forty,” started his college baseball career at Grand View College. He then moved on to play baseball at Drake University and obtained his bachelor’s and master’s degrees there. It was after his time at Drake that Forty knew he wanted to stay in the world of baseball and came back to his roots to coach at GV. “When I graduated from Drake University, I knew I wanted to make coaching a career,” Forty said. “I just realized, you know what... I am majoring in physical education for a purpose, and I want to coach. I was athletic oriented. Athletics got me my degree.” Little did he know he would fall in love with coaching so much that he would still be coaching 50 years later. Forty was the first baseball coach at GV when it changed from college to university status. He took over the program and never looked back. Throughout his years coaching baseball at GV, Forty brought the baseball program to a state championship in 1974, two state runner-ups in 1975 and 1976, seven District 15 titles, seven Midwest Collegiate Conference Championships, participated four times in the 1st round of the National Championship and competed in the NAIA World Series three times. “I really liked junior college sports because they were much stronger than many other levels. I just enjoyed that level; you can go to a junior college and if you’re good enough, you’re there for a purpose,” Forty said. Photo courtesy Grand View University

On and off of the field, Forty believes in earning your keep. He prefers his athletes to call him “Forty” because they need to earn the privilege to reference him as Lou. Forty said, “I started wearing the jersey number 40 a long time ago, and I always give all my young freshmen the idea that you have to earn knowing my regular name to use it, and I usually tell them only after you graduate you can call me ‘Lou’ if you want.” According to Jeff Lamp, a junior on the GV baseball team, this same concept of earning things applies even for the hats they wear on the field. “When players first get to GV, they aren’t allowed to get their baseball hats until after the fall season when, and if, they have earned the right to get one, in the classroom and on the field,” Lamp said. Forty’s goal is to embed the meaning and morals behind the baseball program and being a student athlete. Forty knows he only has two to four years to coach each athlete and make an impact on their life. Although Forty knows he cannot satisfy every player, he wants to give a good experience to every athlete he mentors. “If all of a sudden you come to Grand View University, and you’re trying to play in the athletic programs and someone is starting ahead of you, that can be tough. But what happens is, a good athlete and good person will do everything they can to challenge their teammates, because if they’re good enough to be there, then that makes a winner,” Forty said. When Forty took over the baseball program at GV, the community college was transforming into a four-year institution. “One of my greatest memories was during the pre-game infield, my cousin and I would go out behind second base and shortstop, and we would pick up all the balls that were left behind on the field from the team, and my dad (Forty) would hit us a fly ball that we would catch and run in,” Yacinich said. Growing up on the East side of Des Moines and watching his father coach baseball had always been a part of Lou’s life. “When I was a kid growing up, I always thought I was going to be a professional baseball player. But it didn’t happen. The older I got I just realized that I was pretty limited in my skills,” Yacinich said. He realized this when he went to an Olympic Baseball Trial in Omaha, Nebraska. During the duration of the trial, he came to the realization that his skills may not have been ready for that level of play. Despite that, over the years Yacinich developed into a skilled baseball player and separated himself from the stereotype of having a “stern father for a coach.” Yacinich said his father never had negative comments to say about his performance during each of the games throughout his career. “What is really interesting about it is, he never really critiqued my play throughout my career. He was there if I wanted him,” Yacinich said. With so much time spent in baseball and the history behind the sport within the family, Yacinch never strayed away from his roots by becoming a high school and then college softball coach during the same time of participating in his own fast-pitch career. Yacinich never planned on being a coach when he got older. It all started naturally when one of his men’s fast-pitch teammates became the head softball coach at Valley High School and asked Yacinich to join him as the assistant coach. “That turned into coaching my oldest daughter, Courtney, and then I moved on to coach Urbandale High School, then this job [at GV] opened up and I was able to get this. So it was a weird route,” Yacinich recalled.

Throughout Yacinich’s coaching career, he has been able to establish a culture within his teams and has helped bring the GV softball program to eight qualifiers for the NAIA National Tournament. Yacinich says it is important to remember what he wants his teams known for and how they will be held accountable on and off the field. “Eliminate drama, and play tough” is what both Yacinich’s and their teams strive for.

I Love Lachele’s

Written By: Taylor Thomas |‌Photos By: Dallas Bryson | Designed By: Taylor Thomas | Graphic By: Caleb Grizzle Lucy Fitzgerald (legally Lachele Wendel) is the co-owner and namesake of the recently opened diner, Lachele’s Fine Foods, here in Des Moines. However, Fitzgerald is also a writer, popular podcast host and lover of all things strange and unusual. The University of Northern Iowa graduate acquired a bachelor’s degree in English on a whim, after learning that there is too much chemistry involved in Mortuary Science for her liking. She ended up loving it, and even taught English in China for a year at Xiangtan University. After returning from China, Fitzgerald worked her way up the ladder at Meredith Corporation in Des Moines. She started freelancing and eventually gained a full-time position with All Recipes magazine. Laid off in 2017, Fitzgerald did not let this get her down. After a few weeks of job hunting, the podcast she started with her two best friends the same year, began to take off. “I just kind of made a conscious decision to lean in and make it work,” Fitzgerald said, and there is no doubt she followed through. Wine and Crime, the podcast where “three friends chug wine, chat true crime, and unleash their worst Minnesota

accents,” was born in February 2017. Her interests in oddities and traditionally “gross” things get to run free on this show. Co-hosting with childhood best friends Kenyon Laing and Amanda Jacobsen, Fitzgerald thought this would take up only a couple hours of her week. The idea came from the normal habit of the three friends getting together to drink wine and laugh about the bad reenactments on Forensic Files. The show took off in a matter of months, and people everywhere are tuning in to listen to the three friends’ take on each topic. Fitzgerald, getting to use her knowledge in writing and fascination for morbidity, does the background and psychology segment for each episode. Laing and Jacobsen follow up with two related cases, and of course the show is perfectly paired with a glass of wine. Fitzgerald understands that a true crime/comedy podcast is a bit of a weird intersection. However, for the women who listen to the show, it is a form of self-care. With over 85% of the audience being female, Fitzgerald and her co-hosts work tirelessly to make Wine and Crime a show that makes women feel less like the damsel in distress. “If we can see the monster and understand it, sort of overload ourselves with that violent imagery, then somehow it makes us feel

a little bit better,” Fitzgerald said. They are also conscious about who they put on the show, trying to shine a light on more than just “cis-het(erosexual) white female victims.” The women intentionally have goals to cover cases people have not heard of, including people of color, women and trans people. Fitzgerald also makes clear that these tragedies are no laughing matter. “We’re not laughing at victims, we’re laughing at the absurdity of the perpetrators,” Fitzgerald said. The goal is to try to bring a little bit of lightness to a horrible topic. On top of the podcast, being a restaurant owner was not ever in Fitzgerald’s plans. Her husband, Cory Wendel, brought up the idea to her at the beginning of the pandemic. The veteran chef found the perfect location on Ingersoll Avenue in Des Moines and could not pass up the opportunity. It took a lot of convincing to get Fitzgerald on board with the idea. “I’ll name it after you,” Wendel said. Lachele’s Fine Foods opened their doors February 2021 and they have not slowed down for one second. Unsure of how opening weekend would go, Fitzgerald was overwhelmed with the amount of support from the community. “The whole city came out—people loved it!” Fitzgerald said. The small diner brings a unique and colorful atmosphere to the area, one Fitzgerald takes pride in helping create. The “Charisma” pink walls perfectly compliment the teal barstools and checkerboard floors. The walls are donned with pictures taken by David Poe, Fitzgerald’s uncle, taken in the mid-1970’s, giving the place a ton of character and sentimental value. The interior is striking, but the food and the staff is what makes the place stand out. The kitchen has an openbar style where customers can sit and watch their food be made. The menu features a handful of burgers, hot dogs and a few sandwiches, but there is a different lunch special every day. “Every day it’s just more outrageous than the day before!” Fitzgerald said. The tattooed staff also adds to the funky aesthetic of the diner. “They’re just very unique and good at what they do,” Fitzgerald said. “It’s dinner and a show, really.” The restaurant is mostly in the hands of her husband, but she is their biggest supporter. “Not holding me back from things that I want to do is something that she’s done for me in an incredible way,” Wendel said. “Through all the years that I’ve grown up, learned things, become what I consider a better person was a lot because she pushed me in that direction.”

Plans for a second LFF location is in the works, with dreams of a catering kitchen and more storage than their small business can currently offer. But for now, they are all having fun with what they have. “The food is exciting, but it’s also a place you can just go and hangout and feel totally comfortable,” Fitzgerald said. The best thing on the menu, according to Fitzgerald, is of course the Lachele Burger. More specifically, a single Lachele Burger with a side of tater tots, with cheese sauce and a side of LFF sauce for dipping. Whatever adventure is next for Fitzgerald, it is sure to pack a punch. Be sure to follow @lachelesfinefoods on Instagram to keep up with wild food specials and @ wineandcrimepod to join the coven and laugh along with the latest murder mysteries to fill the mind, body and soul.

“If we can see the monster and understand it, sort of overload ourselves with that violent imagery, then somehow it makes us feel a little bit better,” -Lucy Fitzgerald

Feeling SAD? Written By: Danielle Castillo and Caleb Grizzle |‌Photo By: Ashlee Seaton |‌Designed by: Trevonte Diggs

With fall in full swing, and each day’s amount of sunlight slowly decreasing people are at an increased risk for seasonal-related depression, according to the Mayo Clinic. This seasonal-related depression is also known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). SAD can often go undiagnosed or be dismissed as the “winter blues.” Seasonal depression can impact students on campus at Grand View University who might be unaware of this fact. Emily Barnes, assistant director of leadership and counseling, plays a key role in supporting students on GV’s campus. Barnes defines SAD as seasonal depression that is impacted by the reduced amount of daylight, the colder days and the experience of transitioning to indoor time with artificial light. Barnes went on to share that she begins to provide students with warnings or a “heads up” each October that the change in season may impact their mood. Barnes also provides practical resources for students here on campus. She always recommends people take vitamin D. GV offers free counseling, peer counseling services and other mental health resources on campus. Barnes also recommended that students try to stay connected to nature through plants, or even trips to the botanical center. One practical resource that could help someone navigate the mood swings that come with SAD is a bright light therapy device. HappyLight, a simple desk light, is a full-spectrum light that mimics sunlight for under $30. According to Barnes’ research, around 14% of people deal with SAD but what is being done to aid all of those dealing with seasonal depression? Dr. Gowri Betrabet Gulwadi, a professor of applied human sciences, is also an architect at the University of Northern Iowa who teaches and trains future architects to see the intersection of design, psychology and mental health. Her goal is to design health-promoting spaces. Health-promoting spaces often pertain to light and the lighting within a room that impacts those in the room. “That awareness [of light] is what our students take home with [them] through our classes,” Gulwadi said. “Because maybe when you are designing a therapeutic space, you are considering some of those things. What is surrounding you? It’s not just the source of the light but what is the full context?” One of her main focuses is on rooms that can provide healthy lighting or devices that promote bright light therapy, similar to the HappyLight. “That bright light has the influence of mimicking what our body needs when we have those correct sleep-wake cycles,” Gulwadi said.

Her work at UNI can change college campuses and medical facilities of the future. Gulwadi shared her dreams of seeing more awareness around lighting and prevention that is centered around “trauma-informed design” and “inclusive environments.” Her ultimate goal is to achieve a healthy balance when it comes to work, rest and time spent outside. Gulwadi continues research focusing on design principles that can positively change environments for improved mental health. Chiropractic work also plays a key role into the world of mental health with different supports and treatment options for those in need. Dr. Allison Fair, a chiropractic care doctor at Iowa Family Chiropractic in Ankeny works with patients who experience SAD. As a chiropractor she believes in the body’s natural power to heal itself. Her work has helped patients by introducing them to chiropractic care and providing resources to vitamins and light therapies. Fair said,“[SAD] is really prevalent in the state of Iowa or in the Midwest and it’s because not only is it dark, but it’s cold.” Because darkness contributes to SAD, Fair believes in the importance of consuming more vitamin D during the winter months. Vitamin D helps the body become healthier and more resistant to infection and inflammation. “We need sunlight to convert vitamin D in our bodies and vitamin D is a big one for Seasonal Affective Disorder,” Fair said. Vitamin D is made by the body’s exposure to sunlight. It is important to take vitamin D during the winter months because there is a greater risk of getting sick due to less sun exposure and people spending less time outside. “You can get vitamin D from a lot of leafy greens, but your body can’t process it out of food if it doesn’t have the sunlight. So that’s why you need to supplement with vitamin D,” Fair said. Vitamin D deficiency can cause low bone density, increased risk for depression and mood and behavior issues. Low vitamin D can also impair cognitive function and brain health. Chiropractic care, Fair says, can help improve mood behaviors, relax the body and relieve stress. “You don’t feel like you need to sleep so much, you get up easier in the morning. Chiropractic care gives a good energy boost. Chiropractic care forces you to get the body checked out and makes you feel better,” Fair said. Fair provides advice and encouragement for people who may be experiencing SAD, “Find someone to talk to. Sometimes it gets to the point where you need help. No one should be too ashamed, embarrassed or nervous to reach out,” Fair said.

“Find someone to talk to. Sometimes it gets to the point where you need help, no one should be too ashamed, embarrassed or nervous to reach out,” -Dr. Allison Fair

CHURCHED AND ABUSED WARNING: ARTICLE CONTAINS CONTENT OF SEXUAL ASSAULT AND RAPE Written By: Caleb Grizzle |‌Photos By: Trevonte Diggs and Provided Photos | Graphic and Designed By: Camden Blowers Mark Driscoll, Ravi Zacharias and Rev. John J. Geoghan: three men whose origin stories are remarkably different, yet all share one common attribute, they were known abusers of their spiritual position of leadership. Mark Driscoll the former pastor of Mars Hill Church, a megachurch in Seattle, WA, was removed from leadership due to demeaning, sexist comments. Driscoll was also known for fostering an abusive and domineering culture. An example of Driscoll’s character as a leader was on full display when he attributed a pastor’s infidelity to the fact that he believed the pastor’s wife had “let herself go.” Driscoll’s misogynistic and sexist rhetoric reared its head through his messages and persona. Ravi Zacharias, a renowned Christian apologist for more than 40 years, died in May of 2020. However, it came to light that Zacharias covered up rape allegations, sexual misconduct and abusive patterns during massages that he requested. It was reported that Zacharias had financially supported four personal massage therapists through his ministry fund. Christianity Today reported that a woman spoke with investigators and said that Zacharias would provide financial support and expected sex in return. Zacharais viewed it as transaction. She called it rape. John J. Geoghan’s patterns of abuse were revealed in the Boston Globe. Michael Rezendes’ article reads as follows: “Since the mid-1990s, more than 130 people have come forward with horrific childhood tales about how former priest John J. Geoghan allegedly fondled or raped them during a three-decade spree through a half-dozen Greater Boston parishes. Almost always, his victims were grammar schoolboys. One was just 4-years-old.” These three stories do not stand alone in history as outliers in the realm of religion. They instead stand as landmarks or warning signs for other abusive patterns. Headlines in religious news have at times read like a traditional accusation from the board game Clue: Colonel Mustard in the conservatory with the lead pipe has been replaced with: “famous pastor in the megachurch, accused of sexual abuse.” This was never the design or intent for church, nor should this become normal. These heartbreaking headlines leave weighted questions lingering in the air: What is church in the first place? How could anyone have let this abuse continue on for so many years? How could God let this happen? How could those proclaiming love and mercy be so destructive?

What is Church? A simple google search spits out results in .97 seconds with answers to this question, albeit seemingly unsatisfying answers, “a building used for public Christian worship” or “a particular Christian organization, typically one with its own clergy, buildings, and distinctive doctrines.” The longevity of church and its global impact appears to result in a deeper definition and design for church. Church has to be more than a building for worship or just a particular organization with distinct doctrines, right? For church to bring people together, divide nations, destroy and restore homes all at the same time there has to be one unifying element. Three pastors, Dakota Jackson, Rechab Gray and Rev. Dr. Russ Lackey were tasked with defining what church meant to them and its true purpose. “Church serves to love people and care for people well, and to be a missional outpost,” said Dakota Jackson, the Salt Company Des Moines director and one of Des Moines’s Cottage Grove’s pastors. Jackson went on to share that God does not need the church, but he chose to utilize the church as a vehicle for love and a place for reaching the community well. “The church should seek to love our neighbors and love those who are in the church and love those who are outside the church,” Jackson said. Rechab Gray, preaching pastor of New Creation Fellowship in Orlando, Florida and former pastor of Cottage Grove Church in Des Moines, said that he wants the church to “be the people of God who display heaven’s cultural values.” When Gray elaborated on the topic of heaven’s cultural values, he shared that members of the church should do their best to be “witnesses and ambassadors” and to proclaim and display the love of Christ. Gray emphasized that God’s kingdom will be a place “where there is peace, harmony and joy. Where there’s conflicts resolved not by name calling or yelling at one another but by extending grace and mercy.” This heavenly kingdom Gray referred to is exactly what he believes the present-day church should strive to emulate.

Russ Lackey, the campus pastor of Grand View University, said, “Church is a place to give it [your humanity] back. And for one hour or two hours a week it’s a place where you gain your humanity back.” Lackey went on to share that church and religion itself are meant to bless others, citing examples of blessing others through food, ride sharing for students and praying over them. Lackey also acknowledged religion’s role within a variety of movements. “[Maybe] the three most human movements for rights in the 20th century had religious leadership,” Lackey said. Lackey was specifically referring to Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Mahatma Gandhi and Nelson Mandela as the key religious leaders of human rights movements. “Religion has the ability to speak into power because there is power that comes with it, and when it’s used to speak into power it can do some tremendous things,” Lackey said. This power that Lackey references also pairs with a deep trust that is granted to leaders, and they are faced with a choice. “They can use that trust to do positive things or use that trust to do terrible things,” Lackey said. Church is meant to bless, it is meant to love others well, it is meant to restore ones’ humanity and emulate a heavenly city; however, church has clearly missed the mark at times throughout history. How has this mark been missed and hurtful behavior been carried out in a place that promises such hope? This tension leads directly into one of the lingering questions of spiritual abuse.

How could anyone have let this abuse continue on for so many years? This question shined the brightest in the case of Ravi Zacharias and John J. Geoghan. Zacharias and Geoghan’s habitual abuse was enabled by a lack of accountability. Religion News Service reported on Zacharias’s former ministry spokesperson, Ruth Malhotra, who eventually raised questions about Ravi Zacharias International Ministry (RZIM) for covering up sexual abuse allegations. Malhotra is no longer with RZIM as she was fired months after raising questions about a cover up. “The leadership chose not to act when the evidence was right in front of their eyes,” Malhotra told RNS. “I have less faith in Christian institutions — particularly when these institutions become breeding grounds for Christian celebrity culture — because I’ve seen firsthand how elements of entitlement, fame and fortune harm our own people and hinder our gospel witness to a watching world.” Jackson echoed the dangers of this elevation and entitlement as well, saying, “we can create walls around people [so] that they’re untouchable.” This creating of walls is especially dangerous within ministry. Another consistent theme shared by Jackson, Gray and Lackey was that there is a deep need for accountability within any church setting. “I think one of the biggest things is accountability, but accountability to the point that it is uncomfortable,” Jackson said. Gray reiterated the importance of accountability, saying, “though there might be plurality, there might not be parity.” Gray shared the fact that even though there may be a number of people surrounding spiritual leaders, like within the Catholic Church, or a board of elders supporting a pastor,

Spotlight

“Spotlight,” a 2015 award-winning film starring Michael Keaton, Rachel McAdams and Mark Ruffalo, follows the Boston Globe’s investigative journalism team. The Boston Globe’s investigative team, Spotlight, as it navigates the history of allegations and sexual abuse cases within the local Catholic Church in Boston. This investigative journalism brings to light systemic issues of cover ups globally within the Catholic Church. Their first report released in 2002 detailed many of the survivors’ experiences and how the church mishandled the allegations for decades. An excerpt from Rezendes’s first report said: “Before Geoghan ever got to Weston in 1984, he had already been treated several times and hospitalized at least once for molesting boys. And he had been removed from at least two parishes for sexual abuse. In 1980, for instance, he was ordered out of St. Andrew’s in Jamaica Plain after casually admitting he had molested the seven boys.” This excerpt, along with the rest of the Boston Globe article, displayed the systemic issue of reinstating priests who had sexually abused minors within the church. The articles written by the Spotlight team are still free to read on the Boston Globe’s website. Recently, in October of 2021, reports were released by the Associated Press on the Catholic Church in France that said, “Based on projections, the independent study estimates some 330,000 children overall were victims of sexual abuse linked to the church from 1950-2020. Of those, it estimates that some 216,000 were abused by priests, and the rest by other church figures such as scout leaders or camp counselors.” This systemic issue of abuse within the Catholic Church continues to be uncovered, and as the instances of abuse are uncovered, the words of psychotherapist Richard Sipe ring truer each day: “If it takes a whole village to raise a child, it takes a whole village to abuse a child.”

it does not equate to parity or equality. No matter the setting there must be parity. “Where there is no parity, there can be the Catholic Church, or a board of elders supporting a pastor, it does not equate to parity or equality. No matter what the setting, there must be parity. “Where there is no parity, there can be no genuine accountability,” Gray said. In Lackey’s personal experience, during his early time as a pastor, he shared the fact that he worked to keep himself from settings where there was no accountability. He worked to surround himself with others who supported that desire. Lackey’s desire to protect the trust that was granted to him as a pastor protected him from accusations or gossip, but it also protected the church body from potential hurt. One extension of accountability, that carried equal weight from the trio of pastors was that above charisma, teaching skills, spiritual knowledge or connections, character has to come first. “Their character is the most important thing about them, it is not about what their gifts are and those kind of things. Somebody’s character has to be the number one thing,” Jackson said. Gray went on to give an example of a way to learn a great deal about a leader’s character, saying, “Honestly, how a person responds to that two letter word [no], says a lot about their character.” One story that might not have the same level of glaring abuse as Zacharias’ and Geoghan’s was the story of Mark Driscoll. Mike Cosper of Christianity Today uncovers Driscoll’s story within his podcast, “The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill.” Within this podcast, Cosper states that religious leadership becomes very dangerous when “charisma trumps character.” This trumping of character, lack of accountability and covering up of another’s heinous actions were patterns discovered within instances of spiritual abuse. These patterns appear to have assisted in letting abuse carry on for many years. People in the immediate circle of the abuser have played a role with spiritual abuse, but where was God during all of it? The message of the church is a message of hope centered around the hope that God provides. How could God let this happen?

How could God let this happen? Dr. Guy Cunningham, professor of psychology at GV, addressed this question with a widening of the scope of the abuse of power. “I don’t think it’s endemic to religion, I think it’s common in almost all power relationships. We see it in athletics. We see it in the workplace,” Cunningham said. This abuse of power Cunningham references can be used to push away or abuse those who are submitting to whomever is in charge of them. Although the church is susceptible to abusive leaders, is God at fault? Gray and Jackson attempted to answer this question. “God did not do that. If you have been hurt, you have been abused, gone through things in the church, it’s mankind’s creative wickedness that has caused that deep, deep pain and hurt,” Jackson said. Jackson continued sharing that the Bible is full of passages, specifically within the Psalms, that are full of people crying out to God in positions of pain and that God wants to draw near to those hurting. Gray shared a similar sentiment, “I think any person who

is honest with themselves would be able to admit that they have tendencies towards hurting people.” He also expressed that many immoral actions or “sin” is restrained by our circumstances. Gray shared that what creates a perfect storm for abusive or immoral behavior is a lack of accountability and a lack of self-control in a position of power. When humans are placed in positions of power, their tendencies to hurt or take advantage of others may rise to the surface. Religion and church are made up of humans who may be placed within positions of power, and they are not immune to the temptations that follow. Cunningham drew a comparison with famous athletes or directors and their sexual abuse cases. There have been clear instances of abuse of their power over those under them, exploiting them for their own gain. For example, Harvey Weinstein, Larry Nassar or Jerry Sandusky all provide parallels of those in positions of power in the sport and entertainment industry committing abuse. Even though church should be the last place abuse is uncovered, immoral actions from its leaders appear to be inevitable. God is said by Gray and Jackson to be with you through it all and ready to turn those experiences for good. Lackey echoes this idea as well, even after hurt, it is still a place where restoration can occur. “I am sorry that a place that is meant to give you your humanity back, is something that has taken it away,” Lackey said. “I do believe when church is at its best, it will help you live, thrive and flourish.” How can a pastor wrestle with this truth that his colleagues may be following in the footsteps of a Mark Driscoll or Ravi Zacharias? How could those proclaiming love and mercy be so destructive?

How could those proclaiming love and mercy be so destructive? Gray and Jackson clearly shared the impact that sin and immoral actions of leaders had on their own lives and careers. Gray said, “Men with positions of honor falling into intentional sin, that took a lot of premeditation and all of that, it just was scary and devastating.” Gray also expressed that he had felt called into ministry before encountering the scary and devastating actions of spiritual leaders in his life, but these events caused him to be apprehensive of the field he felt drawn to. [Text Wrapping Break] “I didn’t know if that’s just what power did to you or position did to you in the church,” Gray said. Paul David Tripp, a pastor and author, penned a book, called “Dangerous Calling” that navigates the heightened dangers that come with being a pastor. The book details how pastors or spiritual leaders should take great care of their surroundings and their own character to protect not only themselves, but the people they feel called to love. This book by Tripp helped Gray feel ready for pursuing ministry despite the scary and devastating experiences he had within the church. Jackson expressed that he was not only disheartened to see people in power use that power in very destructive and sinful ways, but that he has “lost trust in people to the extent of trusting someone wholeheartedly.” “I have come to a point of saying I only trust God wholeheartedly, I only trust God unequivocally trust God and everybody else I believe in,” Jackson said.

TD TD

The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill Church “The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill” is a podcast by Christianity Today’s Mike Cosper. This podcast delves deeply into the roots of spiritual abuse and the dangerous culture created at Mars Hill during Mark Driscoll’s tenure there. Diane Langberg, a Christian psychologist who supports those who have been abused, was interviewed throughout the series. Langberg said, “When abuse is done by a pastor who has a position of power in the church and part of that power is to tell people who God is and what He’s like. When those skills and that position and everything are used to sanction, what is in God’s eyes evil, whether it’s the sexual abuse of someone in the church, whether it’s the way he treats people with his mouth, his arrogance or things like that, it becomes spiritual abuse the way all abuse is. But then it also means that God has been dragged into it and He is on the side of the abuser. And I, after all these years, and I am a word per-son, I don’t have words for the kind of damage that does to a soul.” — The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill: Episode 2. The “damage to the soul” that Langford refers to echoes throughout the Mars Hill podcast. Cosper’s research and writing offer an important porthole into the lives of those impacted in a positive and negative way from Driscoll’s actions, the deep rooted issues of church as a whole, and the look ahead to restoration and hope through broken experiences.

He went on to share that he does believe many people desire to love others well, but to trust them completely would be an ignorant step of ignoring the broken, destructive patterns of humanity. “Although, yes, I have lost some trust in people,” Jackson said. “My trust in God has gone up through painful experiences and so knowing that [God] didn’t cause it but that doesn’t mean [God] can’t use the pain you’ve experienced.” Jackson and Gray both have been impacted by the destructive leaders and members of religious groups, they do not choose to ignore the vile actions of leaders before them or leaders to come. Both men have found a way to find hope amidst the brokenness and carry on doing what they feel called to through a higher, spiritual power. Cunningham reiterated that religion is not immune from abusive powers, as history has shown, and that people need to be aware of this. “A person can engage in anything an unhealthy way or a healthy way,” Cunningham said. “A person can be devout and psychologically healthy or devout and psychologically unhealthy.” This healthy way of engaging in religion or spirituality may look different for everyone; however, as stories of abuse and hurt pour out from the church those that find hope in a religion must face the reality that even those proclaiming mercy and love are not above reproach. Cunningham urged everyone to be willing to question what they have been taught or question any behavior that may feel unethical. This open dialogue and boldness can provide a healthy way for religion and spirituality to coexist with broken humanity. The question that follows, “How could those proclaiming love and mercy be so destructive?” Is this: “Is the hope found in God greater than the pains and hurts of this world?” This question cannot be answered through interviews or within a campus magazine but through other vehicles of communication. Pastors Gray, Jackson and Lackey all had to answer that question on their own while navigating their careers in ministry. Even though many of do not find themselves within ministry, we encounter that very question: Is the hope found in God greater than the pains and hurts of this world?

Note From The Author: Some final words here, if you, family members or friends have experienced abuse within the church or in any setting, the National Sexual Assault Hotline is listed at the bottom of this paragraph. Another number is listed as well: the Clergy Abuse Hotline for Iowa and its hours. As a Christian, I have grown up within the church surrounded by stories of hurt, abuse, broken relationships, doubts and sadness. However, unlike others within this article, I have still been blessed to be surrounded by gracious mentors, loving friends, an eternal hope and a safe place to find my identity within Christ. Although these words may be deemed empty to some, I am sorry for any level of hurt or abuse you experienced at church. I hope that those that have experienced hurt and abuse can heal from that experience and that it can be used to help others. In the words of songwriter Jordy Searcy on his track “Explaining Jesus,” “I’m so sorry, for how it’s been. We’re broken artists. With broken pens. We paint our pride and call it truth. I’m sorry no one explained Jesus to you.” I am truly just another broken artist with a broken pen. I hope one day those that have been hurt by the church can find healing and hope, and maybe one day explain Jesus to me. Photo Courtesy: Camren Offerman

RAINN

(Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) operates the National Sexual Assault Hotline: Call (800.656.HOPE) Iowa Department of Justice; Clergy Abuse Hotline:  Call (855-620-7000)  (Monday-Friday, 8 a.m.-4:30 p.m.)