LOCAL
WANTING TO BE HEARD Speaking with A Voice for Men BY ADAM HAWBOLDT
H
ave you heard the parable about the blind men and the elephant? It goes something like this: once upon a time, six blind men were brought into a room where an elephant was standing. Each man is asked to feel a different part of the animal and determine what it looks like. The one who gets the trunk says it’s like a tree branch, the one who gets the leg says it’s like a pillar, the one who gets the tail says it’s like a rope — and so on. Eventually a conflict arises between the men because each is certain their perspective is right. “Their solution to [figure out] what the elephant looks like is to shout everyone else down,” says Alison Tieman. “To say, ‘No! Your experience is invalid. You have to agree with me.’” Sitting in the upper level of a book store, perched on the edge of her chair, Tieman’s hands flit this way and that as she talks about the elephant parable. Her voice is steady and assured. The reason she’s discussing the parable? To explain the backlash at something she did not so long ago. See, Tieman is part of A Voice for Men, a group “dedicated to addressing social, legal and cultural norms that negatively impact the lives of men and boys” — and a few weeks back, she put up some of the group’s posters in downtown Saskatoon. Posters that said things like: “Canada is the most frightening place to be a man” and “Feminism = Male Disposability.”
Public reaction was swift. People began tearing the posters down, and national media ran stories calling the posters anti-feminist. “I read a bit of the media attention,” says Tieman. “[A certain news agency] concluded this is the resurgence of machoism. But to that I say men actually expressing their vulnerabilities and owning them is the opposite of the macho persona of strength.” Tieman shifts in her seat and says, “In the traditional attitude towards manliness, you don’t talk about the problems you have. You just shut up about them. That’s what this movement’s all about — bringing those problems, those things men can’t talk about, to the table and saying that they are just as valid as women’s concerns.” Hands still flitting about, Tieman goes on to talk about how men experience discrimination when it comes to the criminal justice system, how they are more likely to get longer sentences. About how men have fewer resources than women when it comes to rape and domestic violence. When the topic of the posters in Saskatoon comes up (specifically the Feminism = Male Disposability one) she says, “It’s gotten to the point where feminism just isn’t listening to the male point of view anymore. It’s actively making it unacceptable. It’s like “shut up, don’t speak.’ I understand, in part, why … people are upset about this. You get attached to your solution. And, especially if you’re a woman, you don’t want to
hear … how women affect men in negative ways.” If this is so hard for people to swallow, then why, pray tell, would A Voice for Men put up posters that were so intentionally provocative? Wouldn’t taking a softer line be more beneficial? After all, the plethora of YouTube videos of feminists protesting men’s rights groups around the country prove, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this is contentious subject.
Alison Tieman wasn’t always so involved in men’s rights. No, there was a time, a couple of decades ago, when she was an ardent feminist. “In my teens I was a feminist and I was becoming very radicalized,” she says. “My mother was concerned with the way I was going. She had been a feminist herself, [but] had distanced herself from the movement later in life. [When I was 16] she took me aside and gave me a book called The Princess at the Window.” The book served as her introduction to feminist critical literature. From there she gradually began formulating her own theories on gender and created a blog at genderratic.com. “I focus more on men because I think their vulnerabilities aren’t being heard right now,” says Tieman of her blog. That focus soon attracted the attention of Paul Elam, the founder of A Voice for Men, who asked her to write some stuff for his group. At first the information was mostly online, with articles, forums,
discussions and such. But eventually, perhaps inevitably, the group wanted to spread their message to a larger audience. Hence the posters. And it wasn’t just in Saskatoon the posters were put up, either. There were also A Voice for Men posters in Regina, ones that didn’t raise any red flags. Why? Because their messages weren’t as provocative. “The posters are intended to raise awareness and get attention,” says Tieman. “I don’t think it’s our preference [to use provocative posters] … but the reality is this is what got attention.” And what does Tieman hope all this attention accomplishes? “What should be happening
is that both experiences, men’s experiences of powerlessness and disenfranchisement and women’s experiences should be heard on equal footing,” explains Tieman. “Then we will have a better understanding of the problem. Then we can create a solution and an intervention that works.”
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3 AUG 2 – AUG 8 /VERBREGINA
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