Vanguard, FEBRUARY 17, 2013
The agreements
O
UR respective cups will never be full when it comes to find ing meaning to our sometimes black and white existence. Sometimes coming into contact with a truth that challenges status quo can be a bit of a burden especially when your life is a journey of growth. One of my daily prayer requests is for grace to be better and I find that the answer to that are several opportunities to be better. I enjoy audio books and I had listened to one titled "The four agreements". The book propounds a set of principles for pain free living and I was intrigued. I believe my conscience volume may have also been turned up by many notches and I thought I'd share what I gleaned. "The four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz is a masterpiece. It calls for an understanding and acceptance with the Four agreements propounded. It draws on ancient knowledge of the Toltec wisdom and while I don't necessarily embrace all their beliefs, it still made interesting listening. “The Four Agreements" are very basic and I found them easy to memorise but that was the only easy part of the implementation. I did understand them all but I underestimated how set I was in my ways and if anyone was scoring I would have failed many times per hour. Ruiz talks about the domestication of humans to conform
with expectations and regulations making it almost impossible for them to live in their own truth and liberty. What he doesn't mention is the detachment one needs to exhibit in order to practise the agreements; it turns out, I am not detached enough. The first agreement seemed easy enough " Be impeccable with your word. I could have written that myself except for this part; impeccability means to be without any sin in my words; to use my words carefully and truthfully without harm or damage to others. I like to think of myself as kind but speaking has become a weighty impediment especially when you have to balance a busy work life, family, friends and the world at large to navigate. My intentions are always grand and I pray before I leave but I find myself failing even before I leave the house. It almost feels like vexations to the spirit are orchestrated just to aggravate me and provoke sinful words out of me. There is also the dilemma of balancing truth with kindness. Its a tight rope maintaining impeccability with truth. The truth is sometimes very hurtful so do we just stay mute? Its an even tighter and higher rope having to be patient with obviously dishonest and mean people. The second agreement is even more tasking." Don’t take anything person-
ally". Apparently nothing is about us. People do whatever they want because of them, we bear no responsibility and shoulder no blame, gain or pain for their actions. Sounds very simple but how does that help when they do things that break our hearts? How do you not take personal hateful words and actions? On the flip side, how does one not take personal, declarations of love? I fully lay claim to the affection and love of my spouse and children; its very personal. When one is at the receiving end of unkindness and unfair actions, its hard to process the second agreement. I fail this agreement regularly as my
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Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama
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feelings are not compliant with its principle. Losing a loved one may not be personal but it hurts the same. Pain feels very personal and so does love. This particular Valentine's day was probably the best one I ever had. I thought my husband could never surpass my gift but I was floored by his act of validation. If I followed the second agreement; then it would mean the gesture that meant the world to me
wasn't about me and while that position may have its merit, I don't accept it. The third agreement is a bit more practicable and needs a lot more maturity to implement. Its simple " Don’t make assumptions". We make all sorts of assumptions because we don't have the courage to ask questions. This was so true of me when I was younger. I didn't like confrontations so I never faced up to situations. I take full responsibility for most of my hurt and heartache back then. I let my imagination supply me with information that were at best delusional and eventually painful. This particular agreement is one I actually started living before I even got the book. Life taught me to ask questions, to verify, investigate and confirm. It actually validates my position to grab life by the horns and confront any issue that is unclear head on. Embracing truth no matter how painful can only be liberating and eventually peaceful. My advise to everyone is right from the author himself, "Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama.” The final agreement is the one we all should aspire to. "Always do your best. ” Lately I have found that doing my best is all I have to offer. I can't do more or be more. Living my authentic life is the best I have to offer. I used to be a person who would stoop to fit in and compromise to be accepted. Those days are gone, now I no longer apologise for my choices and beliefs; they are my best. I end with a quote from the book. “God is life. God is life in action. The best way to say, "I love you, God," is to live your life doing your best. The best way to say, "Thank you, God," is by letting go of the past and living in the present moment, right here and now.
Jonathan, Obj row gets messier BY EMMA AMAIZE
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ESSIER! That aptly captures the feud between President Goodluck Jonathan and former President Olusegun Obasanjo. Both leaders went deeper into the trenches in their battle for the soul of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) at the weekend. While Jonathan moved to consolidate his grip on the party which, on Friday, sacked Obasanjo’s loyalists, from the South West, from the National Working Committee (NWC), the former president’s loyalists hinted they were taking their case to the National Executive Committee (NEC) for intervention. The Obasanjo loyalists also accused the PDP national chairman, Alhaji Bamangar Tukur, of replacing the sacked supporters of the former president with a caretaker committee in the South West zone headed by his associate, Mr Ishola Filani. Filani was a special adviser to the PDP national chairman, perceived to be on the side of Jonathan in his feud with Obasanjo. The Jonathan, Obasanjo feud climaxed on Friday with the sack of the latter’s associates, Mr Segun Oni, PDP national chairman, South-West, and the national auditor, Mr Bode Mustapha, from the National Working Committee
(NWC). The sack was the fallout of the court verdict which earlier ousted the PDP national secretary, Prince Olagunsoye Oyinlola, also an Obasanjo associate. Total grip Sunday Vanguard gathered, at the weekend, that the president, as part of moves to have a total grip of the party, will hold a meeting with members of the G-84, comprising state chairmen of the party, members of the NWC, members of the Board of Trustees, BoT, and some select members of the NEC. The first leg of the meeting was held on Thursday, but Jonathan, as learnt, asked Vice President Namadi Sambo to preside, just as the issues reportedly raised were, among others, the need for the party to grow in an atmosphere of peace and unity. At the meeting, Sunday Vanguard that those in attendance commended the president on his achievements especially in the area of the economy, infrastructure and assured of their unalloyed support to the Jonathan administration. Sambo was said to have thanked them for the visit and they pledged their support. According to a source close to the Presidency, a follow-up meeting was being planned where the G84 members will meet with the president on the need to be
with him at all times as the leader of the party. Prior to the last meeting of the BoT, held January 7, where a new chairman ought to have emerged, there very strong indications that Jonathan relaxed, but what happened the night before the meeting was cancelled opened his eyes to the intrigues in the party. As the PDP leader, he was said to have found that he was not in charge especially against the backdrop that his favoured candidate would have lost as Obasanjo and his former Vice, Atiku Abubakar, though not at the meeting, were in charge of the events of the day, save for the Professor Jerry Gana-led committee coordinating the parley. Another move was a motion by Senate President David Mark at the BoT meeting to have another five-year tenure for the Secretary, Senator Walid Jibrin, from Nasarawa State and that blocked the chances of Obasanjo’s loyalist and former Chairman of the PDP, Dr. Ahmadu Ali, from becoming the Chairman of the BoT and to pave the way for Chief Tony Anenih, whom Jonathan is said to be backing for the position. To start with, the president, through the PDP National Chairman, Tukur, immediately asked Onwe Solomon Onwe, an ally of Jonathan, to step into the shoes Oyinlola, an associ-
ate of Obasanjo. In sacking Oni and Mustapha on Friday, the PDP NWC also axed the Ogun State faction of the party loyal to Obasanjo. The NWC recognised the faction of the PDP which has been in opposition to the former president. ‘Our case for the PDP NEC’ The chairman of the Obasanjo faction of the Ogun PDP, Senator Dipo Odujinrin, who spoke on behalf of the loyalists of the former president after an emergency meeting that lasted about seven hours in Abeokuta, the state capital, yesterday, said they were taking their case to the party NEC. According to Odujinrin, Obasanjo’s followers were shocked by the action of the NWC in sacking the PDP zonal leadership and the former president’s faction of the party in Ogun. According to him, the Obasanjo group will seek to get the NEC to reverse the NWC action. Odunjinrin explained that their move was in accordance with Article 31 SubSection 2(8) of the party’s c o n s t i t u t i o n . “At our meeting this afternoon, we resolved in accordance with Article 31 sub-sections 2 (8) of our constitution to appeal to the National Executive Committee (NEC) of the party to ensure this injustice is corrected,”he stated.
Comrade Gloria Okolugbo, Honourable Commissioner Directorate for Multi-lateral Relations and Abuja Office, Delta State Government flanked by Dr. Sharon and Mr. Adione both prominent Deltans in Abuja cutting the ceremonial cake for Deltans residing in the FCT and environs.
2014: Anambra guber race hots up;
Obiogbolu flags off campaign BY LEKAN BILESANMI
A
guleri in Anambra East Local Government Area of Anambra State was agog when political heavy weights, business moguls, captains of industry, students, and traders gathered for the flag off of Dr. Alex Obiogbolu campaign for the 2014 governorship election in the state. The venue of the epoch-making declaration of interest in the governorship race by the technocrat was the multi-purpose hall
of the Tourist Garden Hotel, Aguleri. In his speech, the chairman of the day, Chief Ben. Emeka, who said he was over whelmed by the large turnout of young and old politicians, noted that the candidature of Obiogbolu was the answer to the prayer of the lovers of good governance in the state who have been thinking of a credible replacement for the incumbent governor, whose second tenure ends on March 17, 2014.