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10 YouTube
South Carolina at Miss Teen USA 2007—I personally believe, that all U.S. Americans, everywhere, like, such as, should see this video. Not only does Ms. South Carolina not answer the question in any way, but she seems particularly pleased with her answer when she walks off the stage. Then again, so does Mario Lopez. Needless to say, she doesn’t get awarded runner-up, but she does endure an awkward segment explaining herself on “The Today Show” the next morning, where Matt Lauer tries to convince her that he’s had similar blank-faced answers on-air. Really, Matt? I think we can all agree this is the first time in television history someone has stumbled and fallen this hard. Boom Goes the Dynamite—Ok, let me retract that last statement, because this is almost painful to watch. The sports newscaster’s teleprompter breaks, and apparently he hasn’t been trained on how to speak into a camera without a typed script. He goes completely blank while the audience sits in silence watching last week’s sports clips. Finally, he decides to narrate the basketball play happening onscreen. When the ball goes in the basket, his only thought deemed good enough to speak aloud is, “And… Boom goes the dynamite.” Redemption!
The Evolution of Dance—This one’s good not just for a laugh but for a serious lesson in American dance history. How is it possible that he’s that good at every move from the last five decades? I suggest writing down songs he uses in this sequence to make a grade-A dance mix
Here’s a rundown of some of the best and most-watched YouTube videos of all time. Some are funny, some are just plain weird, but all are worth five minutes of laptop time. By Laura Nix
Montgomery Flea Market—Does anyone out there like mini-malls? If so, according to its manager, you’ll love the Montgomery Flea Market. This guy does a great job of advertising his furniture, but what I want to know is, where did he find that suit? P.S. Be sure to check out the “Flea Market Redemption.” Now these prisoners appreciate the song for the masterpiece it truly is.
Leprechaun—Why this real news story wasn’t broadcast nationally, I’ll never know. Either Alabama’s located at the end of the rainbow, or this little leprechaun got stuck up a tree in the dirrrty South. The poor guy gets taunted by locals who want to “get the gold.” By far the best part is the drawing done by a real, live witness of the leprechaun. Truthfully, I think this illustrated “portrayal” was actually just ripped off the head of a hangman game from one of the newscasters’ coffee breaks. Ghost Ride the Whip—If “ghost riding the whip” isn’t the best way to spend your Saturday afternoon, I don’t know what is. In case you’re not in on America’s latest and greatest activity, “ghost riding the whip” occurs when you put your car in drive, then proceed to dance in, on, or around the car while it’s moving. Ghost riding the whip will earn you some serious street-cred, but you may want to reevaluate how much that’s worth when you see the video of a courageous dancer getting his car stolen by a quick-thinking pedestrian.
Robot Dance—Thank God someone at this high school thought to film the talent show. There’s no way these guys had trouble getting ass during their adolescent years. That point is further driven into the ground by the B.A. white tennis shoes. Money—One thing’s for sure: AFTER seeing this clip, you’ll never want to make your own music video. NOTHING could beat this. I don’t know who I feel more sorry for, the girl with the ridiculous dance moves or her mortified friend, who seems to have spent her monthly allowance on this music video service at the mall to genuinely show off her singing talent. The fact that they’re still in their junior high school uniforms makes it all the better.
Crank Dat Harry Potter—I always knew Harry Potter had some ghetto in him. Maybe if he’d listened to this pump-up song before fighting Voldemort, he would have finished the job in Book One. I think one of them is using a mop as a flying broom. And why do they neglect to pronounce the last letter in every word? I’m not gonna lie, though, the song’s kinda good…
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culture
Muffins—I’m not sure about the hilarity of this video, but if I didn’t include it we’d probably be sifting through a lot of hate mail in the V Mag office. It’s one of the mostwatched YouTube videos of all time, owing to the fact that Ms. Cunningham has the most sincerely blank and bewildered facial expressions. Is it creepy to anyone else that this guy probably plays cameraman, in addition to every other character, in his video?