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Impr int The university of Waterloo’s official student newspaper

Friday, May 29, 2009

imprint . uwaterloo . ca

vol 32, no 3

Commedia all’italiana

New regulations mandates course outlines Michael L. Davenport editor-in-chief

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n informal policy has now become university regulation: course outlines are no longer optional. At the UW Senate meeting on May 19, a measure was approved that requires professors to submit course outlines to all students of undergraduate classes. As of this fall, outlines will be required to be given to students in electronic form or as hard-copy handouts — expecting students to copy the information from an overhead or whiteboard is not an acceptable substitute. The outlines will have to be in the hands of students by the end of the first week of classes and will have to contain certain elements. The complete list of requirements is included below:

The policy mandates that course outlines contain:

√ √ √ √

course number and title; class days, times, building, and room number; instructors name, office, contact info, and office hours; TA’s name, office, contact info, and office hours (if applicable); course description; course objectives; required text and/or readings; general overview of the topics to be covered; expectations of the course, including requirements, deadlines, weight of the requirements toward the final course grade; acceptable rules for group work; indication of how late submissions and missed assignments will be treated; indication of where students are to submit and pick up marked assignments; the institutional-required statements regarding “Academic Integrity”, “Grievance”, “Discipline”, “Appeals”, and the “Note for students with disabilities”

Geoff McBoyle, chair of the senate undergraduate council, told Imprint, “It is important for students to know what they are going to be taught in a course. Secondly, it is crucial that students know in writing how they are going to be assessed in a course.” Earlier, McBoyle had told the Daily Bulletin that most instructors already provide a course outline, but that some leave out crucial information. When presenting the measure to senate, McBoyle gave two rationales for requiring course outlines. One, he said that in the past, there have been disciplinary cases where the outcome actually hinged on the specific contents of the course outline. Two, the outline can then be used as a point of reference, to help students keep their credits when transferring to other universities. A full course outline is more descriptive than an abstract course code like FINE 396, McBoyle pointed out. In addition, professors will be required to file the course outlines with the secretary of their department. Though in the future, UW may introduce a central management authority for the documents. The new policy will not hamstring professors from making ad-hoc changes to class or marking schemes to improve class grades. (For instance, some professors will optionally drop a midterm from a class and put the extra weight on the final, if that will improve a student’s marks.) McBoyle told Imprint, “The mandatory outline will not prevent professors from making changes to marking schemes if the changes have the support of the students in the course. However, if the marking scheme is changed, no student has to be penalised as a result of  the change made.” When asked what McBoyle added, “If students find themselves in a course where the course outline is not being followed, or is not presented in time, or at all, they should contact the Associate Dean for Undergraduate Studies for the Faculty. [They] will look in to the concern and indicate what action the professor should take.” editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Students and faculty were treated to a classic Commedia dell’Arte show this Tuesday evening in the Arts Quad. The comedy, a puppetry production entitled Le avventure di Pulcinella, was put on by Italian performers from Teatro dell’Acquario, a theatrical organization in Cosenza, Italy, which engages in a cultural and academic exchange with the University of Waterloo. A group of UW drama students recently returned from Cosenza, where they staged performances of the student-written Differ/End: The Caledonia Project. The Teatro dell’Acquario troupe is now completing their half of the exchange, traveling through the Kitchener-Waterloo region and Greater Toronto Area. Ethan Oblak

In this issue... news opinion Features arts science science2

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News

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009 news@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Toxic chemicals heisted from uw research group Jacqueline McKoy reporter

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iology research at UW took an unsettling turn when vials containing a highly toxic substance were stolen from a field research site in Cambridge this past weekend. According to a news release from UW Vice President of University Research George Dixon, a graduate student and two undergraduate research assistants were collecting water samples as part of research led by biology professor William Taylor and environmental science professor Sherry Schiff, 14 13 cm-long vials of water samples containing a solution of sodium azide, a common but dangerous laboratory preservative, were missing from a cooler at the site at 9 a.m. on Sunday morning. Several other items were stolen, including rubber gloves and a shovel.

In the new release, Dixon noted that “both the lab staff and student researchers followed proper procedure in the care, collecting, and handling of these sample bottles.” Professor Dixon was unavailable for comment at press time, but Dean of Science Terry McMahon said that to the best of his knowledge, this is the first incident of its type in the Faculty of Science. He also noted that “there will probably be some discussion” with the departments of biology and earth and environmental science regarding field research practices. At present, there are no university-wide security procedures for field research beyond approval of risk management forms submitted for each project to the Office of Research.  The concentration of sodium azide in the vials was .26 per cent, which would cause serious illness if ingested. Sodium azide, in higher

concentrations can also cause death via skin contact or inhalation of fumes produced when the chemical comes in contact with certain metals. Waterloo Regional Police’s Public Affairs Co-ordinator Olaf Heinzel said that while the case is currently being treated as a theft, the organization “still doesn’t have a clear picture” of exactly how it happened. As of press time, there have been no further developments in the investigation. Anyone with any information concerning this case should contact Waterloo Regional Police Division 2 at 519-653-7700 extension 2299. —with files from Waterloo Regional Police and UW Daily Bulletin

Paul Collier

Death, Trials, and nuclear testing

Tejas Koshy imprint staff

Tamil leader declared dead

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s of May 24, 2009, the Liberation Tigers of Tamil Eelam, also known as the Tamil Tigers, have formally declared their leader, Velupillai Prabhakaran, dead. The Tamil Tiger’s head of international relations Selvarasa Pathmanathan signed the formal statement. This confirmed last week’s report from the Sri Lankan military stating that the Tamil Tiger’s leader was killed in the recent military offensive undertaken by the SriLankan military. The statement from the Tamil Tigers confirmed his death by stating that their leader had achieved “martyrdom” and also declared a week of mourning. However the statement did not reveal the precise circumstances surrounding his death. The statement also included a declaration, stating that the LTTE will continue to further its aims in the non-violent political arena. The Sri-Lankan military issued reports last week stating the LTTE’s leader was killed in the recent fighting, as the army closed on the Tamil Tiger’s last stronghold, a coastal strip northeast of the island. The military reported the leader was killed, when he attempted to break through military lines in a bus. Later they that his body was found on the banks of the lagoon and that he had been killed in the fighting that occurred These statements included photographs, which depicted images of a corpse, who officials claimed was the LTTE’s leader. The Sri-Lankan military in recent months had initiated a full-scale

military offensive with the stated aim of driving the rebels from their territory, which once covered onethird of the country. This offensive, which has drawn the attention of the international community, which has accused both sides of humans, rights abuse. — With files from BBC Scientology on trial in France

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he Church of Scientology has been placed on trial in France, having been accused of organized fraud. This is due to a claim by an unnamed woman, who the BBC reports as being “pressured into paying large sums of money” after being offered a free personality test. The Church of Scientology has denied these claims and stated that “no mental manipulation” took place. The unnamed woman claimed that individuals belonging to the Church of Scientology, in Paris, approached her. She stated that she later ended up spending up to 21,000 Euros ($ 33,132), on lessons, books and medicines that were supposed to improve her mental state. Her lawyer states that the Church regularly makes money by means of selling fraudulent materials through use of mental pressure. The Church’s lawyer stated, “We will contest every charge and prove that there was no mental manipulation.” The Church’s spokeswoman has stated that is being “hounded” by the French legal system Under French law, the Church of Scientology is recognized as a sect, not a separate religion. The organization faces the possibility of being banned, if it loses the case. This is the first time that the church, as an organization, has

been brought to court. Previous cases were against individuals who belonged to the Church of Scientology. — with files from BBC

Flat tuition fee at U of T campus Mohammed Shouman reporter

North Korea nuclear test

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s of May 25, 2009, the People’s Democratic Republic of North Korea alleged that they conducted an underground detonation of a nuclear bomb. This has prompted international condemnation, that include the United Nations and NATO. This would be the second confirmed nuclear bomb testing conducted by North Korea, the first having occurred in October 2006. A South Korean news agency has stated that hours after the underground detonation, three short-range missiles were test-fired. North Korea has yet to comment on that report. The state gave no details about where the detonation took place. However South Korean officials have stated that a seismic tremor had been detected in the northeastern town of Kilju. This was the site of North Korea’s first nuclear test. On North Korean state radio, an office communiqué was read, which stated that another round of underground nuclear testing had been successfully conducted as part of measures to enhance the Republics self defense. The communiqué also stated that the test was safely conducted In addition the U.S. Geological Survey stated that a 4.7 magnitude on the Richter scale, was detected at 12:54 am GMT, ten kilometers underground. The agency indicated that was the result of an underground nuclear explosion. — With files from BBC

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he University of Toronto’s school council has approved of a new fee plan in which arts and science students attending the St. George campus will be paying a flat tuition fee. By September 2011, new students will be charged for five courses, even if the students are only enrolled in three or four.. Currently, tuition for arts and science students is individually based on the number of courses a student is taking. Student leaders have expressed disappointment, with the student union filing a lawsuit with the Ontario Superior Court. A court date has been set for early July. Student union vice-president Adam Awad said that students opposed to the move were not given adequate time to discuss their concerns. The president of the Association of Part-time Undergraduate Students, Jeff Peters, compared the new fee to “going into a store and buying three loaves of bread for the price of five.” The Dean of Arts and Science stated that it’s a “good day for undergraduate education”, because the new fee policy will help the university maintain its quality programs. The university has also argued that several Ontario universities already practice this fee structure. The plan, it said, will encourage students to take full course loads, so they will complete their degrees quickly and save on uni-

versity living expenses. Because the government pays universities for the number of courses taught, and not the number of enrolled students, the flat fee structure is expected to generate $8 million to $14 million a year more in government funding. To date, the university’s two suburban Scarborough and Mississauga campuses have no plans to switch to the flat fee policy. — With files from The Globe and Mail and The Toronto Star

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Opinion

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009 opinion@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Bit-rot 2.0

Friday, May 29, 2009 Vol. 32, No. 3

O

ur digital age is praised for the ease at which information can be copied. But the downside (which is less oft mentioned) is that digital information necessitates copying. For instance, earlier this week I wanted to show a friend the Mathematics Society webpage, as an example of excellent web design. I navigated to mathsoc. uwaterloo.ca and my reaction was “Hey? What happened? This isn’t the site I remember. Oh well, the Engineering society page is well designed too...wait, this wasn’t what it looked like.” Both websites had been redesigned in the last year, and the slick designs I wanted to share had been replaced. Shifting page layouts are minor quibbles, but I have found the web to be a terrible archival medium on all levels. Website redesigns also break links, so my oldest of bookmarks no longer work. I’m not too surprised that a student society, with the society’s ever-shifting membership and all, would likewise have an ever-shifting website. However, I expect better from news organizations. I’ve saved Toronto Star links from 2006 which are completely broken, and the Globe and Mail links only work if I pay money. My old BBC links still work; for that they should be commended. Hilari-

Editor-in-chief, Michael L. Davenport editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Advertising & Production Manager, Laurie Tigert-Dumas ads@imprint.uwaterloo.ca General Manager, Catherine Bolger cbolger@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Ad Assistant, vacant Sales Assisstant, vacant Systems Admin., vacant Distribution, Christy Ogley Distribution, Garrett Saunders Interns, Julea Gelfand, Brandon Rampelt Volunteer co-ordinator, vacant Board of Directors board@imprint.uwaterloo.ca President, Sherif Soliman president@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Vice-president, Anya Lomako vp@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Treasurer, Lu Jiang treasurer@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Secretary, vacant secretary@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Staff liaison, Caitlin McIntyre liaison@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Production Staff Felicia Rahaman, Erin Harrison, Jacqueline McKoy, Matt Pankhurst, Peter Trinh, Andrew Dodds, Paula Trelinska, Mavis Au Yeung, Paul Collier, Tejas Koshu, Steven R. McEvoy, April Pawluk

Next staff meeting: Monday, June 1 12:30 p.m. Next board of directors meeting: TBA

something on the internet sufficiently awesome, I assume it’ll disappear, and archive a copy for myself. Compounding this problem is the unstable nature of digital storage itself. With the greater data density modern technology offers us, comes greater vulnerability. CDs are prone to bit-rot, catalyzed by light. Magnetic media can demagnetize.

With the greater data density modern technology offers us, comes greater vulnerability.

Sometimes web content disappears for other reasons. For instance, when Wired wrote an article about alleged plagiarist Todd Goldman, his lawyers sent the magazine a cease-and-desist. Now if one visits the URL, the message “Sorry, incoming readers! Our legal counsel has advised us to remove this post,” appears along with a copy of the letter. Copyright infringement claims (valid or otherwise) can also down content. Google “bogus DMCA takedown” and you’ll see what I mean. Either way, whenever I find

How do you save information from the entropic chaos of the universe? (Answer: carve zeros and ones in stone.) The moral of the story is this: websites lack the archival quality of dead-tree newspapers. The old copies of Imprint I have lying around will outlive me, but I can’t rely on webpages being around for the next decade, let alone forever. If you want to keep anything on a website, your only choice is to save a copy for yourself. And save it in several locations, while you’re at it.

Community Editorial

Just say hello

Graphics Team Paul Collier, Sonia Lee, Peter Trinh, Tifa Han Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Editorial submissions may be considered for publication in any edition of Imprint. Imprint may also reproduce the material commercially in any format or medium as part of the newspaper database, Web site or any other product derived from the newspaper. Those submitting editorial content, including articles, letters, photos and graphics, will grant Imprint first publication rights of their submitted material, and as such, agree not to submit the same work to any other publication or group until such time as the material has been distributed in an issue of Imprint, or Imprint declares their intent not to publish the material. The full text of this agreement is available upon request. Imprint does not guarantee to publish articles, photographs, letters or advertising. Material may not be published, at the discretion of Imprint, if that material is deemed to be libelous or in contravention with Imprint’s policies with reference to our code of ethics and journalistic standards. Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit and refuse advertising. One copy per customer. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Imprint CDN Pub Mail Product Sales Agreement no. 40065122.

ously enough, I can still read the article which my technically-illiterate friend cut, pasted into a Word document and emailed me. Think about that. The issue is on my mind because Imprint’s board of directors has mandated a website update. We will probably break our links. And that will break my heart. (Okay, I’m being melodramatic.)

Allan Babor president, federation of students

O

ne of the best things about Waterloo is that it is a student driven community. With over 30,000 students attending Waterloo, Laurier, and Conestoga, undergraduates and graduates make up a significant percentage of the population. Our community has a dynamic vibe thanks to the constant turnover of students, a mix of long and short-term residents, and the

For most of us, our journey away from home begins in residence, or what I like to call “Easy Street.” What a life! Not only does someone else cook and clean for us, but we also have a Don as a resource 24/7! Responsibilities are limited to waking up for class, meeting new friends, and holding a parttime job. The Department of Housing creates an environment that’s the “Right Fit” for you. Acts of deviance are often dealt with internally, with minimal consequences, while community development

Waterloo should continue to be a place we are proud to call home. Not a hotel where we stop in every now and then, get to use the pool and gym, and don’t have to make our beds in the morning. collaboration of three distinct campuses. It also comes with unique opportunities initiated through collaborative developments, inspirational youth, and a diverse population. This is our Waterloo. A strong community starts from the ground up and we must take a greater interest in what our neighbourhood looks like today, and ten years from now. What do you want to see when you walk out your doorstep? What does it mean to be a resident of Waterloo?

Editorial Staff Assistant Editor, vacant Head Reporter, vacant Lead Proofreader, Katrina Massey Cover Editor, Mohammad Jangda News Editor, vacant News Assistant, vacant Opinion Editor, Adrienne Raw Features Editor, Keriece Harris Arts & Entertainment vacant Science & Tech Editor, Bogdan Petrescu Sports & Living Editor, vacant Photo Editor, Ethan Oblak Graphics Editor, Armel Chesnais Web Administrator, Sonia Lee / Arianne Villa Systems Administrator, vacant

editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

is fostered through weekly events and communal lounges. After a year has passed, we are ready to take on the world. This path may take us in one of three directions: 1) Move back into residence as an upper year student or Don, 2) Make a deal with your best friends to sign a year lease, or 3) Find a four month sublet before heading off to your next co-op job. What an adventure! Now you’re incharge of the cooking and cleaning! Responsibilities have grown to involve

paying your own bills, maintaining your property, and voting for your City Councillor. The City (our municipal government) works to create an environment that is safe, and conducive to the needs of its residents. Acts of vandalism and rowdiness are now left to us (or bylaw police) to resolve, while neighbourhood events are far and few, leaving community development more or less up to the initiative of the individual. This next stage can be described as “active citizenship” where we are now charged with expanding the membership of our community to include long-term residents, landlords, and local businesses (among others). As a citizen of this neighbourhood, it is important to recognize that we each have a role to play in making our community a better place. Waterloo should continue to be a place we are proud to call home — not a hotel where we stop in every now and then, get to use the pool and gym, and don’t have to make our beds in the morning. A place where neighbours are comfortable asking each other for favours. Where students and landlords stand side-by-side during garbage clean ups at Waterloo Park. And where everyone feels like they have a voice and are being listened to. This is our Waterloo. Lets work together to push the boundaries of what it means to be a community. Take the first step, and say hello to your neighbour. Send your thoughts on “What it means to be a resident of Waterloo” to Allan at pres@ feds.uwaterloo.ca.

Student Life Centre, Room 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3G1 P: 519.888.4048 F: 519.884.7800 http://imprint.uwaterloo.ca


Opinion

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009



On UW leadership and the price of tea in China - Part 2

misguided manner, many of them consider the essential aim of their gathering to be practice for occupying some future higher political office. I remember a council meeting of the Federation of Students I attended a while ago where we spent so much time on barely relevant procedural issues that we had little time to engage in any concrete discussion about issues affecting students. While I understand that order and procedures are important in the Student Council’s deliberation, one could not miss the general (and highly misguided) feeling that everyone in the room seemed to consider them “the name of the game.” It is very important that our representatives realize that this “monkey see, monkey do” practice is hardly the reason for their election. We never sent them there to mimic some grand governmental machinery, but to deliberate on how best to represent our interests. They have a responsibility to do that in the most orderly, transparent and most importantly, effective way. Another thing it seems our representatives are very confused about is their role in influencing policy. It is a very worrisome situation when our student government has misconceptions about its primary role — and I believe this is one of the more important reasons why they have lost many battles with the administration. It has become very glaring to most serious observers of the student government that the student government treats the administration with kid gloves too much of the time. Often, it is difficult to know whose interests they are acting in; the student’s interests or the administration’s. As I have viewed their proceedings, I have come off with the impression that they reason the line of the administration with students rather than advance the cause of students before the administration. The other day, I was asking one of our student government officials about his plan to curb the school’s skyrocketing tuition. The official replied that they had decided to abandon efforts at the Board of Governors level and concentrate advocacy efforts at the provincial level because reducing tuition will hurt the school’s ability to dispense resources. Now there is

a world where everyone is trying to achieve more with less, should our administration not do the same? More so, how plausible is that explanation when we watch millions of dollars in funding flow from the province to the school for numerous projects? Instead, perhaps out of a notorious laziness or lack of discipline, our representatives are too willing to hail through documents they have not even had the luxury of reading. In this carelessness, the most toxic provisions pass through on some kind of rubber stamp arrangement without the benefit of scrutiny the system is designed to encourage. Many of our representatives do not care to ask in the face of arbitrary tuition increases. “How

much more funding do you need?” “Why do you need it?” “Where else could you get your funding from?” (Here I would recommend reducing the President’s bloated salary and benefits package). In truth, one wonders if representatives even consider their jobs to be anything more than a resume-building exercise. Another tendency of our student leaders that greatly hampers their effectiveness in advocacy is their inability to present and communicate clear plans of action. Too many of our students leaders are fluffy, sketchy, dodgy — anything else but clear, concise and resolute in their action. Student government seems more or less to be a “wait and see,” “anything goes” operation instead of an organization with a specific mandate. Of course this is a problem that is compounded by a flawed election procedure. Too much of the time, candidates lack clear and concise objectives we can hold their performance up to — they lack words that matter! Instead, their campaigns are filled with meaningless one-worders like “change” and “community.” Instead of selling candidates on concrete

Our student government needs a wake up call so they can stop putting “a good relationship” with the administration before the undergraduate students’ interests.

challenge. They have failed to realize that the representation they have at these board rooms should give them a voice that today remains strangely silent. The second problem and indeed the more pressing one it seems is that our student leaders and representatives are confused about their own job descriptions. In some highly

really no problem with that (disappointing as it is that governments are such inefficient bureaucracies they must be constantly lobbied and pushed on issues as important as education). But I wonder, is there no way UW can cut ambitious costs boldly incurred by an administration that indulgingly looks to its sapling undergraduates for a “bail out.” In

do list” that barely communicates a message. I wonder if they do not realize that 50 random sentences hardly represent a plan of action. Campaigns at this school have often degenerated to excessive pandering rather than healthy and constructive competition amongst differing proposed courses of action a potential candidate or administration would likely take if given the mandate. On the few occasions when candidates are challenged to provide a plan of action, they respond by mumbling something about engaging students. The hidden irony is that only by responding definitively to issues will students be able to identify with candidates beyond irrelevant and even harmful association links like

student concerns. I wondered why questions on issues of students’ concerns were sidestepped for questions that seemed more appropriate for a staff promotional exam. This attempt to block fresh insight and approaches to student issues is very frustrating to student representatives who mean well. Clearly our institutions need more scrutiny and less praise. Our student government needs a wakeup call so they can stop putting “a good relationship” with the administration before the undergraduate student interests. They must realize that they are there not town criers to come and relay the administration’s decisions to us, but they are there as representatives, to fight decisions

Campaigns at this school have often degenerated to excessive pandering rather than healthy and constructive competition amongst differing proposed courses of action.

U

nfortunately, the administration finds it very easy to over-rule the student body on a broad range of very important issues primarily because students — and more especially student leaders — seem to have taken their eye off the ball. Indeed, there would be little need for hand wringing now had UW students and their student leaders consistently posed tough and important questions to the authorities and get concrete answers and where appropriate, necessary action. I believe the root of election apathy is many a students’ misplaced priorities — and one that is most painfully borne out of abject ignorance — and perhaps arrogance. There are two reasons, I believe, students at this college repeatedly skim over brilliant opportunities to significantly influence their learning environment. The first is the widespread idea that student government is some special brand of overtly political activity that mimics Canada’s dysfunctional Parliament. Nothing could be further from the truth. Indeed, our student government has the ability to accomplish far more than burdensome party stripes would allow Ottawa. Perhaps, the spin-off of this destructive misconception is that participating in student government is a waste of time — the preserve of “artsies” and politically active “hippies” The obviously false presumption here is that the relationship between the academic excellence (that is our primary purpose here) and the student government is one akin to the price of tea in China. Unfortunately, in this erroneous analysis the student body has failed to draw very obvious connecting dots between the business done in senate boardrooms and much of what is wrong with our UW experience. They fail to correctly tie the enormous mountain of debt deposited in their Quest accounts at the beginning of each semester and the hapless representative in whose absence the arbitrary increases were passed. They fail to understand that the deteriorating quality and content of lectures despite increasing tuition is directly related to spending on some elephant project that your representative did not properly

eaboyeji@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

plans that will improve the lot of the students, we sell candidates on pink shirts, candy, friendship, popularity, influence, or some “experience” (even if they have never recorded any major achievement in their previous positions). On the rare occasion they pretend to offer such detailed objectives, they are often presented as a scattered “to

friendship or candy — and engage them on decisions they have taken. Rather than doing this, student leaders prefer to blame inaction on students’ inability to speak up when in fact students are simply waiting to listen to them and register with their votes objection or consent. The most discouraging thing is that as it is, the electoral system here at the school manipulates this insane culture of “air candidacy” in an attempt to promote incumbency. Debates pose irrelevant questions that feign a misplaced concern over preparedness instead of asking tough questions that force candidates to take resolute positions on important issues. I mean no disrespect in saying this but during the last election’s debates, I had to wonder what relevance the names of FEDS office staff bore to pressing

Question Everything Period

that will come to bite us directly in the butt as effectively as they can. Enticing as the prospects of certain grand projects floated into their meetings seem, they must realize that their responsibility requires that the needs of undergraduates are paramount to, not dependent on, these grand projects. Most importantly, our student government must realize that mimicry is no substitute for effectiveness. It is about time they got serious about defending our interests because it is for this reason we pay them dues. In my hometown we say “It is the calm and silent water that drowns a man.” That is advice UW students and their student leaders will do well to take. Student representatives have a responsibility to ensure that their voices rise with our increasing financial burden!




Opinion

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

MFA = MBA?

Right-brainers, the future belongs to you! days? Why are sports cars so desirable? Why is there a continuing niche for lingerie and other intimate apparel? Why do so many people swear by designer labels when there are many other equally wearable fashions selling at a fraction of the cost? The answer is simple: beauty sells. And always has. More self-explanatory perhaps, is the Apple phenomenon. Without a doubt, the iPod seems to have become the hottest gadget of the 21st century. If the marketplace for MP3 players is overstocked, then you can be certain that a huge portion of that stock consists of iPods in almost every handheld shape, size, and colour imaginable. But Steve Jobs didn’t just stop after introducing the first Mac with beautiful typography in 1984 or a colourfully sleek MP3 player in the new millennium; we saw him go beyond that, answering the call for convenience by creating the MacBook Air — the world’s thinnest notebook that’s also well, very practical. And more recently this year, the Apple team addressed the growing global warming epidemic by introducing the world’s greenest family of notebooks, tapping into a new potential pool of tech-savvy consumers. If you’re still not convinced about the rightbrain power of good design and great marketing, take a look at one of industrial designer Karim Rashid’s best-selling creations — the Garbo molded polypropylene wastebasket, which has sold nearly three million units worldwide. A designer wastebasket! As Pink jokes, “Try explaining that one to your left brain.” Fortune 500 companies such as GM and Sony have all capitalized on the genius of right-brain thinking, with CEOs publicly announcing that they are in fact in the “art business.” Their resulting profits and continued leading success, of course,

speak for themselves. Thinking outside of the box (as right-brain thinking encourages us to do), and venturing beyond the North American continent, we encounter Japan. This country has come a long way since it started manufacturing and exporting automobiles and electronics worldwide. But, it’s not their fancy, fuel-efficient cars or their edgy, state of the art gadgets which are proving to be their most lucrative export; it’s pop culture. Asia, along with automation, is also one of the reasons why applicants statistically have a higher

I’m not here to say that we don’t need doctors, accountants, or lawyers, because we sure do. Just like the human brain, which needs both hemispheres to function, we need both left and right-brained thinkers to collectively change the world. But while most left-brained skills are becoming easier to duplicate these days, right-brained professions with nonlinear skills that are far complex to outsource to another part of the world are becoming more popular. The need for empathetic listeners, creative artists, and meaning-seekers is greater today than ever

The need for empathetic listeners, creative artists, and meaning-seekers is greater today than ever before.

chance of being accepted into Harvard’s MBA program (10 per cent) over UCLA’s fine arts graduate school, which admits a mere three per cent. “Because of Asia, many MBA graduates are becoming this century’s blue-collar workers — people who entered a work force full of promise, only to see their jobs moved overseas,” declares Pink. “The high-concept abilities of an artist are often more valuable than the easily replicated L-Directed skills of an entry-level business graduate.” This is perhaps a shocking fact for all you left-brain thinkers, but an understandable one and a reason to celebrate for all you right-brain thinkers. It is evident, even among Ivy Leagues, that the demand for MFA graduates is on the rise, while the demand for MBA graduates is slowly declining.

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he economy is rapidly sinking into an economic depression. And so sadly, are most people along with it. A quarter-life crisis. That’s what’s happening right now as jobless hopefuls battle out the recession blues, determined to secure a spot in this increasingly competitive economy and find meaning, purpose, and, more importantly, happiness in their post-graduate lives. But, for all you soon-to-be graduates considering grad school to evade the imminent economic war, you may be interested in wanting to know what the world’s hottest credential is right now that’s giving even the most hopeless of these graduates something to smile about. Ready for it? It’s (drum roll, please)… a Masters of Fine Arts (MFA). Yes, you heard me correctly. “The MFA is the new MBA,” argues Daniel Pink in his New York Times and Business Week bestseller, A Whole New Mind: Why Right-Brainers Will Rule the Future. According to Pink, abundance, Asia, and automation are slowly yet surely changing the world in which we live in today. Our abundance of material possessions is leading companies to re-evaluate their business strategies to create products and services that are more appealing to the right brain. “Because of abundance, businesses are realizing that the only way to differentiate their goods and services in today’s overstocked marketplace is to make their offerings physically beautiful and emotionally compelling,” says Pink. To test this philosophy, just take a look around you. Aren’t the spaces in which we live in and the material goods which occupy them a creative reflection of ourselves? Why are condos more attractive to home buyers over apartment complexes these

rthangarajah@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

before. Professions such as designing, nursing, and social entrepreneurship are all thriving in this new age of art and heart. This is not a new myth; it’s an age-old truth. Great inventions, story-telling, spontaneous play, and purpose-fulfilling pursuits have always kept the human race connectively happy long before this new conceptual age even came to be. Only our left brains have been naturally programmed to forget that from time to time. But now, thanks to Daniel Pink’s book, hopefully a new way of thinking will be born — one that creates just as many MFAs as there are MBAs out there today. But of course, I’m only the messenger. The choice to make as you consider where you want to go next is ultimately yours. I just hope you make the right one.

Commentary Battered, but still breathing Julia Hawthornthwaite respondent

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rint media is perhaps not dying, but it is definitely hurting. Recently on CBC’s Metro Morning, I heard something quite unsettling. As if the rise of internet media, lack of advertising, and major papers on the brink of bankruptcy wasn’t enough, we are now outsourcing to India. Yes that’s right, India. In another effort to cut costs, papers such as the National Post, Orange County Register, and Miami Herald, are shipping completed articles over to India for copyediting. I know I’m not the only one who is concerned about this reality. If we start with copyediting, how

long is it before local editing jobs become obsolete? Where have journalistic standards gone? In the past, editors would never have dreamt of having someone from not only outside the country, but outside their publishing culture, report or edit a piece of work. The localisms are simply not there; they aren’t familiar with the institutions, nor are they there to witness events. Print media is struggling in ways many of us have never seen before, but that does not mean it has to die. I believe that we will see a great deal of change to the journalism industry in coming years, some shocking, some sad, but all it seems, inevitable.


Features

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009 features@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Vernacular Stimulation

Dictionary Bailout (noun) Scienced (verb) 1. an insult concluding an impressive display of scientific facts used to prove someone else’s ridiculous statement wrong. 2. typically used in the form, “You just got SCIENCED!

Ted Fleming staff reporter

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ach year, Merriam-Webster selects the #1 word of the year. The selection process is based on the word’s level of usage in pop culture and popular opinion. The interesting thing about this method of selection is that the words chosen are up and coming, but do not have mainstream acceptance yet. Therefore, it is a good starting point when trying to identify new words entering the vernacular. The 2008 word of the year is bailout. While bailout isn’t a new word, it has been brought back to life in recent months with a new definition. Gone are the days when it meant scooping water out of a canoe. Bailout now has a negative connotation evoking the idea of tax dollars paying sky high CEO salaries, accusations of Canada becoming a socialist state, and massive unemployment. As long as you say it with a strong negative tone, people will think you understand the financial crisis. If you are playing the game where you take a drink for every time a word is said on the news, this is a good choice for inebriation. But how do new words enter the vernacular? Pop culture like politics, music and viral Youtube videos bring new slang to a monitor near you (18 inches from

Stoptional 1. (verb) the act of failing to come to a complete stop, or rolling through a stop sign while in a motor vehicle or bike. 2. (noun) a stop sign or traffic light in a remote area with no law enforcement or other vehicles in sight.

1. a rescue from financial distress.

Slut juice (noun) 1. a sugary-vodka concoction with a taste similar to Kool-aid, popular with university students who “don’t really drink.”

E-bail (noun) Recessionist (noun) 1. a person who uses the struggling economy as an excuse to avoid doing things.

your face). Websites like Urban Dictionary provide a forum for people to share and expand new phrases. Thinking back, I have changed my vocabulary over the past few months. Along the lines of bailout, I have begun referring to one of my acquaintances as a recessionist. Many of these instances can be completely legitimate. For instance, a coworker could choose not to buy that BMW X5 because of his unpredictable financial stability. But lately, my friend has been using the “recession” as an excuse to avoid things that have nothing to do with financial success, or money at all. Bill: Hey Chip, will you help me move this Saturday? Chip: Nah, I can’t. You know, tough times, money is tight, and my stocks are down. If anyone can explain what that has to do with economics, I will offer them a subprime mortgage. It’s recessionists like Chip who make Obama’s job so difficult! Continuing with people who don’t really know what they are talking about, the most geographically and culturally local word I have heard on campus is scienced. UWO Girl #1: Do you want some vanilla soymilk? I have three cartons of it. UWO Girl #2: I can’t; I’m

1. A message, “calling in sick,” or canceling a previous engagement sent through the use of technology. Acceptable formats for an e-bail include, but are not limited to: emails, Facebook messages, wall posts and text messages.

allergic to dairy. UW KIN student: An allergy to dairy products isn’t actually an allergy. You are referring to Lactose Intolerance: discomfort caused by the inability for an adult to metabolize lactose (a sugar found in most dairy products). While soymilk contains equivalent amounts of protein, fat and carbohydrates as cow’s milk, it has 0 per cent Lactose. And in case you were wondering, you just got SCIENCED! (Example abridged from a March 18, 2008 post on EavesdropWestern.Blogspot.com) This term can be heard in use between Biology 2 and Optometry building. Note that it is proper etiquette to raise your voice by at least 19 decibels when using this word. It is typically directed towards MathNews writers who have once again gotten their facts wrong, backwards, or negative, if that is even possible. The next word is a personal favourite and useful for all of you co-ops out there. Why call in sick when you can just send an e-bail. We have all called in sick. You can always tell that your boss doesn’t really buy it, but who cares, because the car is loaded, and you are on your way to Sauble! The idea behind the ebail is that you can use technology to avoid actually confronting your employer. You can send a guilt free email, giving as little evidence as possible that you are not actually sick. The beauty of these types

of passive communication is that your boss does not have the opportunity to pressure you to come in to work anyway, or question the authenticity of your illness. And you don’t have to fake dramatic coughs and wheezes in an email. Think of all the possibilities: you can cancel tomorrow’s 8:30am group meeting with an email while on the dance floor in Bomber! If you had called, the music would have given you away. By the way, If you are looking for new material, do not claim swine flu. They are still reporting each case separately in the Toronto Star, so you will be found out. After sending the e-bail and setting out on your summer road trip, you may notice the driver pulling a stoptional. Not only can this strategy save significant amounts of time, but it is also the only environmentally responsible way to drive. It is not fuel efficient to come to a complete stop, and then immediately accelerate back up to cruising speed. It is common knowledge that acceleration uses much more fuel than maintaining a current speed. Even Google Maps encourages the use of stoptionals. Their directions are in the form of “turn right onto University Ave. W.” If they recommend stopping before completing this turn, they would have said so. No matter where the road takes you this summer, don’t leave without the slut juice.

Our residence coined the term in reference to the Wild Vines line of fruit juice-enhanced (read: diluted) wines. These people claim to be wine connoisseurs, although having any knowledge of fermented beverages is enough to know that adding peach juice concentrate to a wine is a bad idea. It is more likely that these students select these beverages because of their low alcohol content and sickening sweetness. Recently, slut juice has been expanded to encompass any “feminine” drink with low alcohol content. The individuals who enjoy these beverages have been known to become the most outgoing people at a social engagement after 1.52.0 servings of this beverage. I was going to include a few more definitions, but the DOW Jones dropped four points in the time it took me to write this, so I have to stop. They just said bailout twice on CNN, so I’m two shots of slut juice behind. Hopefully this article has given you some insight into that crazy language your friends have been using. Keep in mind, that you speak English as much as anyone else. It’s up to you to decide which words are worth using, and which ones are not. And in case you were wondering, you just got ENGLISHED! (I don’t think that will ever catch on…) tfleming@imprint.uwaterloo.ca




Features

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

The Chinese Diaspora

Overseas Chinese often achieve considerable socioeconomic success in the countries they migrate to.

In contrast, Chinese in Myanmar (formerly Burma) rarely intermarry and have largely retained Chinese cultural affinities despite adopting some Burmese traditions. In Malaysia and Singapore, overseas Chinese maintain a distinct cultural community. Particularly in Singapore, where Chinese compose a majority of the population and Mandarin is one of Singapore’s official languages. Some three-quarters of the Chinese diaspora live in Southeast Asia, where much of the emigration took place in the past. Modern Chinese emigration has been mostly to Australia, Canada, US, New Zealand and Europe. In the US reside some three million Chinese and in Canada about 1.3 million. Until the ‘90s most of the immigrants coming to these countries were from Hong Kong or Taiwan, due to the heavy travel restrictions the People’s Republic of China (PRC) placed on its citizens. While the modern linga franca of the PRC is Mandarin, in overseas Chinese communities this often not the case. Cantonese, Hokkien, and Hakka; the dialects of Southern China, where many of the migrants came from are the most commonly spoken languages in many southeast Asian Chinese communi-

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tarting around the 19th century, when the age of colonialism was at its peak, there was a great wave of Chinese migration that started the modern Chinese diaspora. Disease, famine, and demand for cheap labourers in many foreign lands drove many Chinese, particularly those from Southern China, to resettle in other countries. Most of the Chinese migrants settled in southeast Asia, with a few moving out west to Canada and America. Today, there are some 40 million overseas Chinese (those not living in Mainland China, Hong Kong, or Taiwan) across the globe. The Chinese diaspora much like the Jewish diaspora tend to strongly retain their ethnic and cultural identity even after generations in a new homeland. The Chinese diaspora in contrast to other Asian diaspora such as overseas born Korean or Japanese, are still viewed as being Chinese even upon returning to the homeland, whereas Koreans or Japanese born and raised outside of their respective countries, are often viewed as foreigners or outsiders when returning. However, the degree of assimilation into the local culture depends on the locality. In Thailand, ethnic Chinese number about 8.5 million or about 14 per cent of the local population. Chinese in Thailand have largely intermarried with Thais and have adopted Thai names and traditions. Chinese in Indonesia have also a high degree of assimilation due to language and culture laws, which in the past banned the use of Chinese language in public, and certain cultural markers such as calendars.

yliu@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

ties. Because of a growing recognition of the importance of Mandarin, many overseas communities have taken to using Mandarin as a common second language. This is particularly true for western Chinese communities, where for many years Cantonese was the default language of Chinese enclaves. However, due to a growing number of PRC immigrants in recent years, Mandarin has overtaken Cantonese as the lingua franca of North American Chinese communities. The relationship that overseas Chinese have with their homelands have been tenuous in the past. As many overseas Chinese emigrated due to disease, poverty, war, famine and labour shortages, during what is termed as the “hundred years of humiliation” from the mid-19th to the mid-20th century. However, as modern China is rising in both political and economic power, a rise in Chinese nationalism has also been seen among the Chinese diaspora — even among those that come from distinct political entities such as Hong Kong or Taiwan. Both the PRC and Republic of China (ROC) maintain representation for overseas Chinese in their legislative assemblies; the National People’s Assembly and Legislative Yuan respectively.

Whereas once, the PRC viewed overseas Chinese with suspicion, since the 1980s overseas Chinese have been welcomed as important social capital. In turn they have provided considerable investments, contacts, social networks, and opportunities for the mainland. Overseas Chinese often achieve considerable socioeconomic success in the countries they migrate to. In southeast Asia, they form the core of many business communities and end up controlling a considerable amount of the capital in the country relative to their population. On occasion this leads to resentment from the indigenous populace and has breed racial tensions in places such as Thailand, Indonesia and Malaysia. In North America, the Chinese populations have found success in a wide variety of professions due to high rates of post-secondary education. They often have median incomes greatly exceeding the general populace, which has lead to the designation as a “model minority” among many circles. As the Chinese diaspora continues to increase in the 21st century, particularly in the West, an understanding of the cultural traditions, motivations, and values of this group will be especially important. The Chinese diaspora provides an invaluable link to the new China, which is poised to become a major world economic power.

Pronoun Insecurities

“D

patio now open.

open thurs- sat 9pm-2am 667 king street w kitchener 571-9032

ude, if we can understand each other, then who cares?” Yep, grammar. When I came to Waterloo, I figured I’d be entering university as a boy and leaving as a man. After all, we’re all aware of the stereotypical, primitive tribes with their “kill-a-boar-andbecome-a-man” rituals. I often thought of my coming to UW as being a 21st century, “killmy-essay” manhood trial. But it was more than that. Bear with me: We all know that one person whose sole purpose on Planet Earth is to correct you whenever you let down your grammatical guard. Why does she do it? Can he really not find anything else to satisfy his ego and boredom? Will I have to suffer the rest of my life listening to her talk about dangling modifiers? The respective answers: “Just cuz,” no, and probably. And it’s even worse when you try to correct that person’s grammar — of course, she’s the grammar queen — she wouldn’t have knowingly forgotten to use the subjunctive mood! It was done for effect. Before I became this type of person myself, I also had this perspective. “Stop judging me,” I’d say. “You’re the only one who does.” One day, my eyes opened and I realized that there were more people judging me than I’d thought (and perhaps even more than they thought). When you consider how much time and money people invest in their appearance, from cosmetics to clothing and from bathing to brands, we all care a lot about how we look. Back to the test-of-manhood metaphor: university is the time when we (hopefully!) stop thinking like kids, stop acting like kids, and stop dressing like kids. We want people to see us as adults, and we want employers to see us as promising applicants. Our attire is important, and grammar is a type of attire. On this model, your pesky pal correcting

mpankhurst@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

your grammar is essentially equivalent to your gay friend politely asking you to stop dressing like a slob. Suddenly, your “Dude, if we can understand each other, then who cares?” argument is about as jejune as your Power Rangers t-shirt (but with none of the cool). “Even still, it’s rude to correct people’s grammar at dinner time. And, please. We’re playing Mario Kart. I don’t care that ‘Yoshi and him can suck my spiky shell’ is ungrammatical.” It’s nerdy, sure, but is there something wrong with Mr. Grammar’s basking in delight whenever he points out your mistakes? He’s having fun, so lighten up! Most people’s reasons for correcting grammar are probably something like the following:

1. Tolanguage.” “maintain the integrity of the English Let’s be serious — English never had much integrity to begin with.

2. Totypes“stopof dialects. If we have too many English, we’ll have trouble

communicating!” Sorry to break it to you, but this battle’s already lost, and now you’re just being intolerant. Come on, we’re a multicultural Canadian University. That’s not going to fly.

3. ToMaybe — um, I guess I don’t have a third! people ostentatiously correct each other because they’ve taken a religious approach to grammar and are trying to convert everyone they see. Or maybe these grammar “Nazis” (ouch…) are actually lending a helping hand.

Either way, whenever you’re picking out what to wear to that party, remember that your grammar friends could probably teach you a thing or two about dressing up.


Features

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009



Looking for a Hero Steven R. McEvoy staff reporter

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anadian Blood Services celebrated local heroes at Bingeman’s on the evening of May 21, 2009. These heroes were all from the Waterloo Wellington Region, and each of the 406 named heroes reached milestones as blood donors this past year. These men and women are everyday heroes; they take the time to donate blood on a regular basis. They believe that the short time it takes them to make a donation every 64

days can impact many lives. Combined they have made more than 27,000 donations, and since each donation can save up to three lives, more than 82,000 lives have been impacted directly by these 406 donors. That is almost one and a half times the capacity for Skydome for a baseball game. These people reached milestone donations in different categories: 50, 75, 100, 150, 200, and even one who reached 300 donations. Most people can donate blood. To be eligible to donate you must

Art for Seniors

bring photo ID, be between the ages of 17 and 71, and be at least 50 kg (110 lb). Donations can be made every 56 days for whole blood donations, and every seven days for platelet donation. In order to donate you need to be in general good health. At each donation you will go through screening and you will be asked a number of questions to determine your eligibility. Donating blood does not put you at risk of disease, as all needles are sterile, used only once and discarded. The usual blood collection - a “unit” - is about half a litre, or one pint. Your body soon replaces all the blood

you donate. Every minute of every day someone in Canada receives blood products. For some, many many times after that. At the event we heard the story of Baden, currently a vibrant six-year old boy. But at nine days old he was returned to the hospital, and by the time he was two and a half he had received 200 blood and blood product transfusions, and a bone marrow transplant at six months old. His mother Joanne told their story, and the support they received through the whole process. Every one of us knows someone who has received blood or will need

it. Therefore it only makes sense, as we are young and healthy, for us to consider becoming a donor. Every term at UW there is a special on campus blood drive. There is also a permanent clinic at Bridgeport and Weber where donations take place frequently. Each of you can also become a hero, if you start donating now. If you are 20 and start donating now and donate every 56 days until your 70th birthday, you too could donate over 300 pints of blood and help to save 900 lives. For an hour of your time every eight weeks this is a small price to pay to become a hero to so many.

Biology 2 sandbox

michael l. davenport

Paul Nogas paints a flower pot, which will spruce up the a local seniors centre. Several other students participated in the event, organized by the Fraternity and Sorority Awareness club.

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Construction of the Nanotech building continues on the space formerly known as the B2 green. The above photo was taken on May 12 — poured concrete columns have since been added to this landscape, at the locations where rebar is visible above.

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Arts & Entertainment

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009 arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Anime North an event 365 days in the making

Video game characters (above left), steampunk soldiers (middle left), and cartoon characters (bottom left) are just some of the myriad of eclectic faces that turn up every year for Anime North. caitlin mcintyre

Nicholas Terwoord reporter

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nicholas terwoord

nicholas terwoord

or just one weekend, over 12,000 anime fans gather from across the country to the Toronto Congress Centre for an event of giant-robot-sized proportions: Anime North. This year, Anime North was held from May 22 to May 24, and featured many well known guests such as Nobuyuki Hiyama, Mark Hildreth (Heero Yuy of Gundam Wing), Svetlana Chmakova (Dramacon), TV’s Ed the Sock, and many more, though guests such as KOTOKO, Scott Ramsoomair (VG Cats), and Scott McNeil have appeared in previous years. Anime North was first held in 1997 and has grown significantly during the past 12 years, starting at the Michener Institute with roughly 800 attendees, to spanning two hotels as well as two-thirds of the Toronto Congress Centre. It is a convention run for fans by fans, and is one of the largest of its kind in North America. There were several new additions and old favourites at this year’s convention. New this year was the addition of crafter’s corner and the comic market, areas where amateur artists can sell and display their 2D and 3D art. Of the many panels, workshops, and gameshows that were run over the weekend, there has been an increase in the number of panels dedicated to expanding on fan interests and applying fan talents in other contexts some of which included “More than a vacation,” which discussed tips and information on finding work in Japan; “Fan to pro,” how to take the skills you’ve learned as a fan and integrate them with your career; “Do you have the writer’s Gene,” information for people looking to become professional fiction writers; “Filmmaking on a shoestring budget,”

“Podcasting 101”, and “Photography for the unprofessional”. Waterloo was also out in full force at this year’s convention: UW Gamers was responsible for a large amount of the video game programming that took place including Super Smash Brothers Brawl and Melee tournaments as well as Gears of War 2 and Halo 3. The Society for the Study of Modern Visual Culture (full disclosure, I ran the trip) also had a troop of people present at Anime North for their second annual trip promoting fellowship between fans of visual media. Despite being an anime convention, Anime North manages to bring out all sorts of people, in no small part due to the diverse set programming that is run by volunteers on topics ranging from advanced costume construction techniques to the ancient Chinese game of Go, video gaming to voice acting, comics to conrunning and then some. Some of the largest events that take place at Anime North include the masquerade skit competition, J-Idol (like American Idol, but with J-Pop), the Anime Music Video competition, and the All-Star Charity Auction which raises money for the Hospital for Sick Children (which raised $80,000 in previous years). It’s one of the few places where you can find people dressed in medieval armour, a Starfleet uniform, or a Catgirl-maid-witch all in the same room, but also meet industry professionals and fellow geeks as well. Although Anime North is over for this year, it will no doubt be bigger and better next year, and whether you’re a casual fan or hardcore, the convention has plenty to offer and always has something new and exciting to check out. More information on Anime North can be found at www.animenorth.com

What can’t be recreated...

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he U.S. film industry has been really exciting for comics in the past few years. Lately, you may have noticed an amazing boom of movies based on comic books. However, not all of these films are based on your typical mainstream superheroes, such as David Cronenberg’s A History of Violence and Zack Snyder’s Watchmen. It was even surprising for me to find out that Sam Mendes’ Road to Perdition was based on a comic of the same name. With such a variety of upcoming projects such as Surrogates (Mostow) and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (Wright), you can probably guess how happy I am to see such acceptance from one form of media towards another. Of course, like any other form of media that provides entertainment, there are some things that just don’t translate well from comics to film. That’s funny,

ptrinh@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

considering that literature is argued to not translate well into film because it loses written details and context, and that film loses translation into literature because of its visual appeal. But as many have witnessed from the Watchmen film — one of my personal favourites — it had a great number of flaws because its main goal was to re-enact the entire form of the comic. Snyder, to me, has proven that what was initially deemed impossible to recreate on film can be recreated, but I’m a very forgiving film-goer and comic fan. It was an amazing film adaptation, but only a fairly decent film on its own. Probably the one reason I enjoyed the movie was because it was so bizarrely made. Of course, a film is a film and a comic is a comic; many would say as long as it is a really good film, it doesn’t matter how close the material stays to the comic.

There are just some things in comics that can’t be filmed — a statement that comicists such as Scott McCloud and Alan Moore would agree upon. In reading Edgar Wright’s blog entry comments (www.edgarwrighthere.com) on May 5, 2009, Wright replies to a fan by saying, “Don’t hold your breath.” This reply was in regards to the possible adaptation of a popular chapter in Scott Pilgrim and the Infinite Sadness (O’Malley) into the Scott Pilgrim film. While Wright may be joking, it makes sense that there would be no filming of the particular scene, if you think about it. Involving a gauntlet run inside Honest Ed’s discount store between Scott and one of Ramona’s exes — the psychic vegan Todd Ingram — it ultimately causes the building to implode, which would be extremely difficult to film and reproduce considering how busy Bathurst Street tends to be.

I think the latest and greatest example of a bad translation from comics to film is Raimi’s Spider-Man 3. And many of the problems people had with the film had to do with translation. In an almost ironic sense, I thought McGuire’s depiction of Peter Parker under the influence of the symbiote was right on the dot for the comic. To those that don’t recall, Parker did in fact turn into a dick and screwed up everything. It could’ve been translated better to film

though. That’s the thing. While both are very visual forms of media, comics and films are very different entities. It takes skill to make a good comic-based movie. Jon Favreau has done it with Iron Man and Chris Nolan has done it with The Dark Knight, and it’s because they’ve proven themselves to be great directors. Confusing a comic for “only a storyboard” is a dangerous thing for a director to do.

Correction In the May 15 issue of Imprint, the article “Exclamation mark in the story of comics” erroneously stated that Ron Mann was the moderator for Scott McCloud’s Q&A session. The moderator was, in fact, Mark Askwith. Imprint apologizes for the error.


Arts & Entertainment

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

11

Judge a book by its cover

As always, remember, you never know what you will find between the covers.

the cover completely so that the title and author were in large blocks on the cover. I personally was more attracted to the original; it was so unique and different it immediately grabbed my attention. I often judge books by their cover — if I do not know the author their covers induce me to pick up the book or to leave it on the shelf or table. It is all part of how books are marketed to us. The next time you are in a Chapters or Indigo books, check out the tables, check out the books on the end caps of the bookcases. These spaces are rented or sold to publishers. Some tables contain all books by only one publisher, and some will be thematic or issue focused. But most of the books on tables are there to get your attention, to inspire you to pick one up and hopefully purchase it. Another thing used to draw you to certain titles are book lists. At Chapters you receive a discount on the Globe and Mail best sellers’ list. There are also Heather’s Picks — the owner of Chapters-Indigo has a table with her selection of books that influence her and are favorites. Another list is Oprah’s Picks — the day a book is mentioned on her show most Chapters, Indigos and Coles in Canada sell out. The stores start getting calls to reserve them before the show has finished airing. There is an interesting story about Canadian author David Adams Richards. One of his books was selected to be an Oprah Pick. When his publisher told him this, and that it would dramatically increase sales, he went to look at this list of Oprah’s Picks. When he saw the books on the list he did not want his name associated with those other books and opted not to allow his book to be one of her picks. Yet all of these marketing tricks are designed to get you to pick up the book and hold it, in part to judge it by its cover. Seldom do I appreciate it when book covers change. I am a creature of habit and like things to stay the same. A few book covers that have changed the for the worse, in my opinion, are Dust by Arthur Slade, Fidelis by A.R. Horvath, and The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. Some books that have pulled it off well are Orphanage by Robert Buettner, The Singer by Calvin Miller and Night by Elie Wiesel. Drop me a line and let me know what books you have judged by their covers and whether they were worth it. All in all, judging books by their covers has almost always served me well. Seldom have I been terribly disappointed and wished I had not read the book. So as you look at that next book cover, and its placement in the store, consider all the factors in the marketing behind it before picking it up, flipping it over and reading the back. As always, remember, you never know what you will find between the covers.

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ften shoppers judge books by their covers, at least at first glance. I discovered some of my favorite authors by chance as I picked up one of their books based on the cover. Steven Brust’s early novel Jhereg is one example. This book came out when I was 13 — it was about an assassin witch. I loved the art work so much I used the font from the cover of this and others in the series to create the designs for one of my tattoos. Another book I picked up to look at just because of its cover was Orphanage by Robert Buettner. First published in 2004 it had a great retro sci-fi feel, and reminded me of many of the early covers of Robert A. Heinlein’s books. In reading the cover, I found out it was written in homage to Heinlein’s classic Starship Troopers, which offers an amazing commentary on war. So, of course I had to buy it that very day. Third, The Dark Hills Divide by Patrick Carman had something mystical about the cover, which had an effect upon me. I had the book for almost two years before reading it because I did not want the spell of the cover to be broken. In years gone by I collected every edition of different books. Some of Piers Anthony’s books have gone through five or six cover changes. Many classic science fiction books were originally only available in pulp, paperback editions — cheap to make and cheap to recycle to make new ones. I owned the complete Edgar Rice Burrows Warlord of Mars series, originally published between 1917 and 1964. These books were transformational in the years after I first learned how to read. Let me digress for a minute. With a dual form of dyslexia and after having repeated Grade 1, they just kept passing me on in school. I got through my book reports by renting VHS or Beta tapes, and paying close attention in class. In the summer between Grades 7 and 8 I was sent to a private summer school, and I went from reading at a Grade 3 level to reading at a university level and reading over 400 words per minute. It was a whole world that opened up to me — one I never knew existed. Reading became an addiction and books an obsession. I read many DAW books, DAW being a publishing company dedicated to Science Fiction. At the time of their merger with Penguin Group in 2007, they had published 1400 books. And from the inception in 1972 until 1985 their books all had yellow spines and a yellow logo box on the front cover. Therefore as you browsed used book stores you could easily recognize the books even if they were not cover facing. Surely you are aware that a great deal of planning goes into choosing covers for books. Publishers also change covers if a book has been out for a while, or if response was not what was expected. A few years back, a book called The Traveler by John Twelve Hawks came out. In the original prereleases of the book there was no author or title on the front cover. But eventually the American arm of the publisher forced the inclusion of a small black diamond with this information. Later they changed

smcevoy@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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Arts & Entertainment

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

Reviews Books The Princess Plot Kirsten Boie Translated by David Henry Wilson Chicken House – a Division of Scholastic

Reading a book that has been translated is always interesting, for questions will always arise in the back of your head. Is the original this good, or is it better? Has something been lost in translation? But unless you read the original language also and can compare the two you just have to judge the book on its own. As such, this is an interesting story. The Princess Plot is the story of a plain girl, Jenna, who one day after school is asked to

Pygmy Chuck Palahniuk Doubleday

A few years back, I would have told you that Chuck Palahniuk was one of my favourite authors. His work is cutting edge and always shocking. Each of his books is unique, both from other authors and from his own work. Palahniuk has an incredibly imaginative and creative mind. The closest authors to him are Canadian author Douglas Coupland and Scottish author Irvine Welsh. But the problem with always being shocking and unique is that each new work must outdo the previous. As such, I think I have lost my taste for Palahniuk’s writings. Pygmy is a unique, different, and well written book. It is the story of one of a group of Pygmy

audition to play a princess in a new movie. The talent scouts are set up outside her school. She decides to defy her mother and audition for the role. When the audition goes well, she is asked to travel to meet the director for the final decision. There, she is asked to play the real princess of Scandia during her birthday celebration to see if she can really play the role — to give the real princess a day off. However, Jenna soon realizes that things are not as they appear, from the real princess’s uncle and Regent crying over her, to a lot of secrecy. Soon there are rebels, bombings, and a kidnapping. That’s when the adventure really begins.

This story is wonderfully written; David Henry Wilson has translated many books into English and is an accomplished author himself. Between him and Kirsten Boie they have told a fantastic story. The pace is good, and the settings and characters are real and portrayed well. The scenes are well laid out, and the progression and the resolution are entertaining and satisfying. This book will make a great, fun summer read. It is light enough to be a pleasure read but serious enough to keep the reader entertained and turning the pages.

youths from a totalitarian state who have been sent to the United States to live with Christian families and experience a better life. At least, that is what the Host Families and Church believe. Yet in reality, these youths have been raised from a young age as agents of the totalitarian state as part of a planned terrorist attack on the United States. Palahniuk does a great job of dissecting midwestern life through foreign eyes. It is a satire both of America’s fears and of America itself. However, I found that the story was just too much, with its inclusion of male rape, high school massacre, planned seductions, and pregnancies. And the whole book is penned as a series of dispatches from a Pygmy to his home government, written in a halting, broken English. Palahniuk captures a mood with the

language, yet still conveys his message. Palahniuk’s books are usually a pleasure to read and so addictive that I cannot put them down. I have read several more than once, or back to back, finishing and immediately starting to read again. That was not the case this time. Twice I put it down for a few days, and was uncertain that I would pick it up again to finish it. This was the first Palahniuk book I have read in which I easily predicted the ending; that in and of itself was a disappointment. As a book in its own right, it is okay, but as a Palahniuk book it is disappointing on many levels. The hardcore Palahniuk fans out there will love it. I think I have just lost my taste for his extremism.

them off stage. It wasn’t pretty. On the whole, I find their music to be boring, and generic “punk” with lyrics that lack substance and with a band presence that is only interesting to the 12 to 16 year old crowd. For God’s sake, I’ve heard lead singer Mike Herrera rhyme “alone” with “phone.” More than once. ‘Nuff said? Needless to say, I wasn’t thrilled to hear that their new album included some epic tunes from some of the most popular bands of the 1980s including U2, the Ramones, Queen, the Proclaimers, and the Clash. I figured that MxPx’s tone-deaf, faux-punk approach would ruin these 80s anthems and that I would be better off listening to a cat puke. Luckily, I was in for a bit of a surprise. While not all the songs were winners, I found each of the tracks to be a unique take on an original classic — I really appreciated that MxPx didn’t try to imitate someone else’s sound, but instead put a

bit of a twist into them. While I was a bit insulted to hear anthems like “Should I Stay or Should I Go” (no one will ever be able to come even close to the Clash — even to try is an exercise in futility), I felt that MxPx added some fun to “Heaven Is A Place On Earth,” which featured Agent M of Tsunami Bomb (original track by Belinda Carlisle). They also really revved-up the Proclaimers’ “(I’m Gonna Be) 500 Miles.” The best surprise of all, however, was that to my astonishment, MxPx actually did justice to Queen’s “Somebody To Love” — it had just enough glam and trash to make it true to the original. Maybe doing cover albums is where bands like MxPx belong. It keeps us, the public, safe from having their ‘original’ tracks inflicted upon us. All said and done, I suggest you pick up this album only if you’re not particularly attached to the original versions of the covered songs.

— Steven R. McEvoy

— Steven R. McEvoy

CD MxPx On The Cover II Released March 24, 2009

Formed in 1992, MxPx began life under the moniker Magnified Plaid — a Christian rock band based in the thriving metropolis of Bremerton, Washington. Soon after, however, the three 15year-old band members found “Magnified Plaid” was too long to fit on concert posters, so they cut their name down to MxPx. I will be up front with you , Oh Reader — I did not have high expectations for On The Cover II, MxPx’s aptly named second cover album. Perhaps I should give you some background as to my predisposition against the band in question. My last run-in with MxPx took place at a concert in 2006; long story short, it involved me and 600 or so angry concert-goers hurling shoes, curses and threats at them during their set, and finally booing

Guest Comic

sonia lee


Science & Technology

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009 science@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Battery tech has high potential reporter

Lana Sheridan Staff Reporter

graphic courtesy David Xiulei Ji Alterations By Michael Davenport

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above is a diagram of the electrode cathode. The dark smaller tubes are the carbon nanofibers while the thicker tubes are the carbon tubes which are coated with sulfur.

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These improvements showed a fivefold increase in the available energy storage.

one, sulphur does not conduct electricity, so attempting to use it directly as the positive electrode means that not much charge will flow. Another problem is that chemicals called polysulphides, produced in the middle of the reaction, can escape the positive electrode and become attached to the negative one. This leads to a reduction in battery life since these molecules do not contribute to energy storage in subsequent recharging. Prof. Nazar and her group have published the results of a proof-of-principle solution to both of these problems in a paper this month in Nature Materials. Their work considers a new architecture for the positive electrode, distributing the sulphur in a very thin layer over an array of carbon tubes separated by carbon nanofibres. The carbon conducts

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To the right is a close up of the carbon tube with the sulfur coating undergoing the reaction with lithium

veryone wants a better battery. From handheld gadgets to the green energy of the future, many technologies hinge on finding a reusable, cheap, long-lasting power storage device. Thanks to researchers at UW lead by Prof. Linda Nazar, new potential has been found in a chemical reaction that has been studied for 20 years, bringing an exciting development to the quest for the next generation of battery. Lithium-sulphur batteries have long been known to have very high potential energy storage capacities for their weight in theory, much higher than currently-used lithium-ion batteries. Unfortunately, actually exploiting the reactions between lithium ions and sulphur is challenging for many reasons. For

electricity and can impart the charge to the sulphur molecules that are in close contact with it. This allows the sulphur to react with the lithium ions in the electrolyte, the liquid that moves between the electrodes, overcoming the first challenge. The second difficulty is partially solved by the spongy nature of the carbon-sulphur electrode. It helps prevent the polysulphide molecules that become dissolved in the electrolyte from escaping and shortening battery life. However, the researchers went a step further and added chains of molecules to the electrode structure that are very polar and tend to trap polysulphides. Prof. Nazar compares this to keeping a party alive by “bringing out another tray of appetizers” when it looks like the guests might be leaving. Together, these improvements showed a five fold increase in the available energy storage by weight over conventional lithium-ion batteries and a loss of less than 20 per cent of the energy capacity over thirty charging

April Pawluk

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cycles. Prof. Nazar thinks that achieving 100 cycles without significant capacity loss using a positive electrode system similar to theirs would be possible. These batteries may ultimately be of use in large-scale energy storage systems. Toyota provided funding for Prof. Nazar’s project, hoping for technology that could be used in electric cars, where current lithium-ion cells are not ideal because of their limited capacity and cost. In addition, technology based on lithium-sulfur cells could be used to store energy from renewable sources, like wind or the sun, during peak production times for later use by consumers. see BATTERIES page 16

The Economic Crisis:

What’s Love Got To Do? achiang@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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y now, it is no secret that the present state of our economy is significantly impacting our workplace, our school, and our government. Upon further reflection, you may realize the sordid truth — that you never had control over these things to begin with. At this point, if you are a humble person, you might conclude with a sense of peace that perhaps the economy is simply taking back what was rightfully his to begin with — but the economy is not quite so fair-minded.

Tifa Han

According to Grace Lau, a PhD student in the department of psychology at UW, the economic crisis may be affecting one aspect of your life that you thought you had complete control over: your love life. The objective of Lau’s recent study, which involved 52 female undergraduate research participants from the University of Waterloo, was to find out which kind of male participants were found attractive under two different conditions: “no threat” and “system threat.” In psychological literature, the term “system threat” is used to denote a situation in which there is a decline in the stability of the environment (for example, family life, government, or economy). After splitting the research pool into two camps, the “no threat” participants were shown a paragraph detailing how well Canada was doing in terms of its economy; “system threat” participants were asked to read a paragraph describing how Canada was in a state of economic decline. (Lau explained that at the time of the research, the conditions of the economy were such that the “no threat” paragraphs were still believable.) All participants were then

Check out Aletheia’s interview with Grace Lau on

shown the same fictitious the new Science Matters podcast blog: dating profiles for six young http://aletheia.podbean.com men: half were portrayed as non-stereotypically masculine (warm, sensitive) and the other half were portrayed as stereotypically get the same results if she threatened people’s masculine (ambitious, dominating). After sense of control in a different way, perhaps in examining the various men’s photos, learning a more direct way. In a second study, Lau asked participants to what their favourite movies were, and reading a description “authentically written by him,” think of a recent event that occurred beyond participants were asked to rate their level of their control. This event would then act as romantic interest towards each man. Lau found the “control threat.” The proceeding method that under “system threat,” women tended to be was the same as in “Study One”: participants more attracted to the men who were portrayed were shown the same dating profiles and then to be caring, warm, and nurturing over the men asked to rate their level of interest towards who were portrayed to be goal-oriented, ambi- each man. The results? “Under system threat as well tious, and driven. In the “no threat” condition, there was no difference observed in the interest as under control threat…we found that women would rather be with someone who is warm, level for the two “classes” of men. “To sum up, we found evidence that under nurturing and caring, [as opposed to] someone system threat, women find stereotypically who [is] controlling and dominating. “One implication, of course, is that [these masculine men less attractive,” Lau explained. “We think this is because under system threat, findings can be applied] in an economic and women experience a low sense of control, lead- political crisis…On a more theoretical [level], ing to a desire to restore that sense of control, it appears that our need for a sense of control thereby causing them to avoid dominating, can affect interpersonal attraction, it can affect who we find attractive,” summarized Lau. “And controlling people as romantic partners.” To apply her findings at a broader level, these two areas are often considered disparate Lau reasoned that if it really were a sense of in psychology literature, when in fact they can control that was driving the results, she would be related.”


Science & Technology

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

15

The Myth of College Sex Antics regarding her actions as “nothing more than prostitution,” which implicates 50 per cent of Alina’s profits will be taxed by the government, as reported in Mail Online. Although prostitution in Germany is legal, the government claims half the profit. If this indeed is the new “burn your bras” face of modern sexuality, then why is it 47per cent of Harvard undergraduates annually spend their degrees idly abstinant? Washington Post reports this statistic and more — the 2001 student body of Princeton was 44 per cent pure, while 49 per cent of Massachusetts Institute of Technology remained virgin that year. Did the nearly-half of the student body population that remained “pure” escape the sex craze bug, or is a post-graduate education realistically more reserved than the media likes to portray? The dainty Washington Post statistics serve as a thorn in the side of the 2003 Canadian Community Health Survey (CCHS), whose numbers indicate “three in ten young people who had sex with multiple partners in the past year had not

used a condom the last time they outdated research; for example, the is evidently non-credible, when taking had intercourse.” In America, it 2006 “No Strings Attached: The into consideration the fact that, would seem, the young adult body is Nature of Casual Sex in College between 1974 and 2003, Statistics much more STD-conscious than in Students” article in the Journal of Canada has noted a freefall in teen Canada: a 2000 study at the College Sex Research, uses statistics from pregnancies, declining from 53.9 of New Jersey found that “81 percent of HUDid the nearly-half of the student body popuSex (students lation that remained “pure” escape the sex who had experienced at least craze bug, or is a post-graduate education reone hookup including sexual alistically more reserved than the media likes intercourse) reported using to portray? a condom, [and] 25 per cent of HU-Sex (students who had experi- 1999 (“some adolescents may per 1,000 population aged 15 to 19, enced at least one hookup none of use oral sex as a substitution for to 32.1 in 2003. As such, this single which included sexual intercourse) intercourse by defining oral sex as statistic demonstrates provides a reported using other forms of birth “not having sex”), 1997 (“males and glimpse of how mobile the sexual control. It’s difficult to imagine that females are more likely to engage in trends of youth can be. statistics vary this much on a campus casual sex behaviours when alcohol The result of this informational basis, or that students in Canada is involved”), and earlier. Even misuse produces an era of inaccupractise safer sex more meticulously the above listed New Jersey study rate sex imaging, one where Oprah than those across the border. concerning college hook-ups from educates the unsuspecting parental My take on the jumble of 2000, uses social diagrams dating audience about middle-schoolers academic-driven and media-induced in the 1980s and adolescent and having Rainbow Parties and features “monsterization” of student sex young-adult sexual culture norms sex expert Dr. Laura Berman on lives is that a lot of studies, from the early 90’s (like Winslow et. her show, who invites mothers to assumptions and portrayals rest upon al, 1992). The use of these statistics purchase vibrators for their teenage daughters to empower them with the ability to pleasure themselves. On the other hand, the teen sex scare is far less intimidating when viewed realistically. For instance, Project Teen Canada (PTC), an ongoing survey of teenage lifestyles, found that Canadian adolescents are growing more conservative. In 2008, PTC found that “56 per cent of teenagers said they’d never had sex, compared to 51 per cent eight years earlier.” Furthermore, “teen pregnancy rates are declining, condom use is up, and Statistics Canada confirms that fewer adolescents under the age of 15 are sexually active now than in the 1990s.” As such, the parents of this generation of students should not be so hard on their children. By the looks of it, it is the students’ grandparents that lived a crazy sexual revolution in the ’60s…today’s kids are falling seriously short of recreating Woodstock in the privacy of their bedrooms. Sonia Lee

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t’s not easy to forget Natalie Dylan, the Womens’ Studies graduate student from Sacremento, California, who put her virginity up for sale in late 2008. Natalie confronted the oppressive patriarchal concept of the role of the father as the middle-man in a financial exchange of dowry-forvirgin-bride. Being a free thinker, Natalie “decided to flip the equation, and turn [her] virginity into something that allows [her] to gain power and opportunity from men,” she said in The Daily Beast. She even made a spotlight on The Tyra Banks show, telling her story. The highest bidder for the girl’s virginity was an Australian businessman, whose bid was $3.7 million. Sadly, he backed out of the transaction earlier this week (word has it, about the same time his wife found out), leaving Natalie with a non-refundable $250,000 deflowering deposit. A similar story in Germany made headlines early 2009. Just like Natalie, 18-year-old Alina Percea sold her virginity, only this time for 8000 pounds to an Italian businessman. However, Berlin tax officials are

Science Reviews Science Book Review First Principles: The Crazy Business of Doing Serious Science Howard Burton Key Porter Books

“Who is this Howard Burton for whom I am writing this foreword?” asks the first line of the foreword written by Sir Roger Penrose, an Oxford mathematical physicist. “Unquestionably a comic writer of exceptional talents…” the foreword continues. First Principles: The Crazy Business of Doing Serious Science by Howard Burton lives up to the praise piled on by Sir Penrose’s colourful prose. The book details the unconventional story of how Waterloo’s Perimeter Institute for Theoretical Physics came to be through the perspective of its founding executive director Howard Burton. First Principles keeps its readers

consistently intrigued. Whether the intrigue lies within discussing the strange circumstances wherein the genesis of the initiative to establish the Perimeter Institute lies, or the political minefield of trying to obtain government funding while trying not to step on the toes of the surrounding universities.   Those who are familiar with the Perimeter Institute know that it exists because of the philanthropy of Mike Lazaridis, Research-inMotion founder and the Chancellor of UW. The book shines a light on the exciting events that turned Lazaridis’ eccentric vision into a reality with the help of Howard Burton. The book should be an enjoyable read for UW students who are interested in how the Perimeter Institute, the Institute for Quantum Computing, and the University of Waterloo were developed in the last decade. It will also appeal to anybody interested

Want hear more? Check out Aletheia’s podcasted interview with Dr. Howard Burton (Science Matters Episode #1): http://aletheia.podbean.com

in how science gets done in Canada. There is a lot that goes on across the country to provide funding for scientific research in Canada, and this book provides a glimpse into that world. It is a memoir, where the author’s version of the events remains unchallenged, but if taken as such, it is well worth reading. It was a pleasurable read that I would recommend to anybody who is interested in local history, or the advancement of science in Canada. — John Heil


16

Science & Technology

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

The Environmental Debate there are so many other problems affecting the environment such as waste, pollution, deforestation, and nuclear waste. While global warming is one impact from our dependence on fossil fuels, a lot of people ­— both skeptic and environmentalist alike — seem to think it’s the only impact. It seems to be a common mindset that if global warming is true, we should limit our dependence on fossil fuels. If it isn’t, then don’t. What about all the other impacts that fossil fuels have? They are finite, meaning we can’t run on them forever. They cause air pollution which causes horrible health problems in many cities in the world. As well, they have created such huge corporations that have become bigger than governments. A world run by corporations, as is happening now, is a terrifying idea. Especially a corporation that has control of our energy. So even if all of those scientists were somehow wrong and global warming isn’t happening, do we really want to continue using fossil fuels regardless? With the global warming debate and any other environmental debate that is held between environmental-

ists, scientists, and corporations, another question I have is who do you really trust more? Scientists who only want to discover the truth? Non-profit environmentalists who want harmony between humans, technology, and the environment? Corporations who want profit? An environmentalist tells you a particular forest couldn’t be cut or a certain species would go extinct, massive erosion would happen, and other environmental woes would happen. A big timber company says don’t worry about it, none of that will actually happen. Who do you trust more? Someone concerned about the effects it’ll have, even though they get nothing out of it but the forest itself, or a company who is concerned about short-term profit? I’m not going easy on environmentalists in this debate either. Many environmentalists exaggerate the issues they bring up. For example, many use massive percentages. Take tropical forest loss; environmentalists have said that 2–4 per cent of them have been lost, when the UN says it’s actually less than half a per cent. As well, instead of exploding, population growth is actually

I’m not going easy on environmentalists in this debate either. Many environmentalists exaggerate the issues they bring up. For example, many use massive percentages.

decreasing and will likely stabilise at fewer than 11 billion by 2100. While this is not an excuse to stop all environmental efforts, as many horrifying statistics are still correct, it does show that environmentalists should try to avoid exaggeration. They should also get more involved. Instead of spending time and money on protests, petitions and letters to governments to debate the effects on the environment, how about actually getting out and changing something? While petitions and letters are great when it comes to something like a new law or policy, many people consider themselves hardcore environmentalists if they go to all the protests and write ten letters a day. Instead, environmentalists should look at getting out there, becoming involved in the government to create your own policies, or getting involved in creating new energy sources or in environmental research. These have bigger effects and just skip over the whole debate process. The last point I have about the

W

hile many people are scrambling around to solve some sort of environmental issue, most of us are still stuck on one problem that should’ve been solved long ago: the debate over what should be done about the environment. There are still a lot of resources and time being put into research and debates about what’s really going on with the environment. The best example is global warming. Lobbyists, environmentalists, and scientists from both sides are still head to head on the issue of whether our planet is heating up due to human activity and greenhouse gas emissions. While each side is scrambling to try and give the most convincing argument, I wish to say: look around. For the skeptics, look around to see that we are having an impact on this environment and it’s easy to see that as a population that requires resources living on a single planet, we cannot sustain ourselves the way we’re going. For the environmentalists, realize that global warming is an issue, but far from the only issue when it comes to the environment. It seems to me that a lot of resources are being put into the global warming debate when

thelferty@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

environmental debate is this: what do we have to lose? We have two choices in front of us. Option one is we do nothing and continue with fossil fuels and other inefficient practices. Option two is we can actually go about trying to improve and advance technology so that it is at harmony with the planet. If we choose option one, environmentalists could be right or skeptics could. If the former, there’s a global catastrophe with horrible consequences for mankind. If the skeptics are right, then nothing changes. If we go with option two, then no matter who is right — environmentalists or skeptics — we now have cleaner air, less corporate control, less poverty, and everything is efficient and healthier for all. We avoid possible catastrophes and even if none were going to happen, life worldwide is better. A win-win situation. So again, what do we have to lose by living at harmony with the environment? Nothing. Continuing with what we’re doing now, we have everything to lose. Enough debating,

Batteries:

Now 5 times longer

Continued from page 14

An important issue to consider with any industrial application is the cost of production. Prof. Nazar says that for her group’s technology, the raw materials are fairly inexpensive. Sulpher is “as cheap as you can get,” and current lithium prices are reasonably low. However, with more and more automakers racing to find technologies suitable for electric vehicle power, the demand for lithium is slowly rising. As soon as these automobiles go into mass production, lithium demand will go through the roof. Depending on how the situation progresses, we may find that lithium-sulphur batteries become more expensive to produce than we would estimate today. On the upside, the lithium-sulphur batteries that Prof. Nazar is developing could be recyclable and the byproducts are environmentally friendly. First of all, lithium and sulphur are two very common elements found in natural environments: lithium being a component in salt brine deposits, and sulphur being mined from the earth. Also, it is possible to retrieve the lithium from spent batteries to reuse in new batteries. In this way, natural lithium resources need not be depleted to a great extent with continued production of the batteries.

When asked what first inspired her to conduct research in this exciting field of materials and electrochemistry, Prof. Nazar explained that she began her Bachelor of Science at UBC planning on either majoring in biology or physics, “but definitely not chemistry.” During her first year, however, she fell in love with chemistry, thanks to a compelling first year professor, and decided to pursue the subject further. She completed her PhD and was employed by a corporate research company, where she worked with materials related to the first lithium battery ever made. Later, she came to work at UW and has been conducting research on lithium battery technologies since 1994. Prof. Nazar says that she would be interested in hiring students for co-op placements to add to her group, now consisting of four postgraduates, seven graduates, and four undergraduates. For the team, the next step is “making it better,” but she is also looking at other lithium battery concepts. Prof. Nazar says that, provided they are not superceded by a better technology, lithium-sulphur batteries “could be viable in the next five to ten years,” maintaining UW’s place as a leader of green innovation. lssherid@sciborg.uwaterloo.ca


Campus Bulletin UPCOMING Saturday, May 30, 2009 Dance-a-thon: Dance the day away to help raise money for the Family Services program with the House of Friendship. 3 to 8p.m., St. Paul’s MacKirdy Hall. For more info email danceathon09@ gmail.com. Sunday, May 31, 2009 Annie Machon M15 Whistleblower Speaks Out: The Inner Workings of the Secret State - Cambridge University grad who worked within M15 blows the whistle on gross mismanagement and state-sponsored murder. UW Hagey Hall Humanities Theatre. 7 to 8:30 p.m. Wednesday, June 3, 2009 Waterloo Public Square Information Session: The City of Waterloo is looking for adult volunteers to assist with future Public Square events. Come to the informal meeting on June 3, 1:30 to 2:30 p.m., at the Button Factory or on June 4, 7:30 to 8:30 p.m., at the Waterloo Memorial Recreation Complex. Thursday, June 4, 2009 Homer Watson House & Gallery: Please join us for a Public Information Centre regarding the development of a Master Plan for the Homer Watson House & Gallery. 7 to 9 p.m., 1754 Old Mill Road, Kitchener. Saturday, June 13, 2009 Moving Beyond Violence: Lessons from Gandhi: Keynote speaker Arun Gandi at Bingemans Ballroom starting at 5:30 p.m. Black tie optional. Tickets $150 each or table of eight for $1000. 1-800-625-7925 or visit www.rebuildanselma.com. Sunday, June 14, 2009 The City of Kitchener’s Industrial Artifacts Project: Come celebrate the installation of a new acquisition form Canada Cordage. 2 pm on 1252 Doon Village Road at the DoonTwines Mill Complex. Saturday, June 27, 2009 2009 Non-Violence Festival: Victoria Park, Kitchener. Enjoy a day-long concert feat. local bands, entertainment & speakers. Learn about the cause and get involved. Noon to 9:00p.m.

CAREER SERVICES WORKSHOPS Sign up for these workshops at careerservices.uwaterloo.ca. Career Exploration and Decision Making – June 3, 10:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., TC 1112. July 9, 2:30 to 4:30 p.m., TC 1112. Career Interest Assessment – June 9, 2:30 p.m. to 4:00 p.m., TC 1112. July 15, 10:30 a.m. to 12:00 p.m., TC 1112. NOTE: $10 materials charge payable at Career Services prior to the session. Are You Thinking about an MBA? – an overview of requirements – June 10, 5:30 p.m. to 7 p.m., TC 2218. All about GMAT – presented by Geoff Vokes from Kaplan Centre, T.O. – June 10, 5 p.m. to 5:30 p.m.,TC 2218 Career Exploration Workshop - June 3, 10:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., TC 1112. July 9, 2:30 p.m. to 4:30 p.m. TC 1112. Career Interest Assessment - June 9, 2:30 p.m. to 4:00 p.m., TC 1112. July 15, 10:30 a.m. to 12:00 p.m., TC 1112. NOTE: $10 materials charge payable at Career Services prior to the session. Exploring Your Personality - Part 2 May 27, 10-12 p.m., TC1112. Part 1 June 11, 2:30 p.m. to 4:00 p.m., TC 1113. Part 2 June 18, 2:30 to 4:30 p.m., TC 1112. Part 1 July 6, 2:00 p.m. to 3:30 p.m., TC 1112. Part 2 July 13, 2:30-4 p.m.,TC 1112. NOTE: $10 materials charge payable at Career Services prior to the session. Work Search Strategies - June 16, 2:30 p.m. to 4:00 p.m., TC 1208. July 22, 10:30 a.m. to 12:00 p.m., TC 1208. NOTE: Prerequisite for this workshop. Work Search within “Marketing Yourself.”

Work Search Strategies for International Students - June 1, 3:00 p.m. to 4:30 p.m., TC 1208. NOTE: Prerequisite for this workshop. Work Search within “Marketing Yourself.” Entrepreneurship - A Student’s Perspective: UW Arts Grad Jasmin Hofer, reflects on her experiences as a successful entrepreneur. Interactive session - bring your questions. June 4, 12:30 p.m. to 2:00 p.m., TC 1208. Interview Skills: Preparing for Questions: - June 25, 3:30 p.m. to 5:00 p.m., TC 1208. July 14, 10:00 a.m. to 11:30 a.m., TC 1208. NOTE: There is a prerequisite for this workshop. Interview Skills within “Marketing Yourself.” Interview Skills: Selling Your Skills: June 23 & July 15, 2:30 p.m. to 4:30 p.m., TC 1208. NOTE: There is a prerequisite for this workshop. Interview Skills within “Marketing Yourself.” Successfully Negotiating Job Offers: June 17, 2:30 p.m. to 3:30 p.m., TC 1208. July 21, 3:30 p.m. to 4:30 p.m., TC 1208. NOTE: Session geared towards graduating students. Business Etiquette & Professionalism: - June 2, 10:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m., TC 1208. July 16, 3:30 p.m. to 4:30 p.m., TC 1208. Success on the Job: - June 24, 3:30 p.m. to 4:30 p.m., TC 1208. July 23, 2:30 p.m. to 3:30 p.m., TC 1208. Working Effectively in another Culture: - June 2, 3:00 p.m. to 4:30 p.m., TC 1208. Getting a U.S. Work Permit: - Learn more July 23, 4:30 p.m. to 6:00 p.m., TC 1208. Are You Thinking about Med School/ Perspectives of a Waterloo Grad: Learn more about the medical school application process in Ontario - July 11, 10 a.m. to 12, TC 2218. Job Information Session for Graduating Students: - July 21, 10:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m., AL 116. July 23, 2:30 p.m. to 3:30 p.m., AL 116.

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009 ads@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

VOLUNTEER

ONGOING

Summer volunteer opportunities with Family and Children’s Services of the Waterloo Region. Summer reading club, bookbag club, and boys’ activity club volunteers needed. Contact 519576-1329, ext 3533 or Carey.Reist@ facswaterloo.org. Shadow needed to be paired with international students. Show them around, help resolving culture shock and make their stay in Waterloo more enjoyable. Make friends and expand your knowledge. Please apply at www. iso.uwaterloo.ca. City of Waterloo needs environmental field assistant: occasional spring and fall weekdays. For info call 519-8886478 or www.waterloo.ca/volunteer. Volunteer Action Centre, 519-7428610 / volunteer@volunteerkw.ca, has the following positions posted – Christian Horizons is a rewarding ministry to share your time and talent with. www.christian-horizons.org. Do you like driving? Are you an early riser? The Food Bank of Waterloo Region needs experienced truck drivers this summer to help with pickup of perishable food donations and immediately transport them to various food progrms in the community. For details call Rose at 519-743-5576, ext 226. Grand River Hospital’s Freeport site is seeking volunteers for patient services, one-on-one visiting, hair salon and recreation programs and retail. For info call 519-749-4300, ext 7147. The Arthritis Society is looking for volunteers to deliver a formatted presentation about arthritis to various groups and organizations. Training and support is provided. One presentation per month with a six-month commitment requested. Call Jennifer at 519-7432820, ext 104. Are you a creative thinker and writer? The Leadership Waterloo REgion Marketing Committee is seeking a Communications Specialist in assistance with the development of annual reports, inviations, recruitment ads, media release, etc. Call 519-742-7338 or alavender@leadershipwaterlooregion.org.

MONDAYS Gambling can ruin your life. Gamblers Anonymous, 7 p.m. at St Marks, 825 King Street, W, basement. FRIDAYS Season of Argentine Tango lessons in Waterloo starts May 2009 at the Princess Twin, Waterloo at 7 p.m. Beginners and advanced lessons with dancing from 9 to 11:30 p.m. (Tango, Swing, Salsa) Call 519-581-7836 or casadeltango@yahoo.ca.

UW RECREATION COMMITTEE UW Recreation Committee events are open to all employees of the University of Waterloo. Register by emailing admmail.uwaterloo.ca. Tuesday, June 9: 12 to 1 p.m., Bees and Beneficial Insects with Ken McRae, CD 1304. Monday, June 15: 12 to 1 p.m., Home Health Care – Making the Right Choice, LIB 328. UW Book Club meets June 17, Sparrow, by Mary Doria Russell ; July 15, On Chesil Beach, by Ian McEwan ; August 19, Unfeeling, by Ian Holding. Cost is price of book if you wish to purchase it. Dana Porter Library, room 407 at 12:05 p.m. Details www.uwrc.uwaterloo.ca. Discount tickets are available for Centreville (Toronto) Island, Ontario Place, Ontario Science Centre, Royal Ontario Museum and Wings of Paradise. Email uwrc@uwaterloo.ca for a UW code for online ordering. Are you interested in participating in a Weight Watchers At Work group? 20 people needed for group. Email Andrea at amcharet@artsservices.uwaterloo. ca. Saturday, November 21: Robin Hood Pantomime at St. Jacob’s Country Playhouse at 2 p.m.

ANNOUNCEMENTS Crown Ward Status: attention students who are/were Crown Wards needed to work with large, Provincially funded

Classified BED & BREAKFAST

Colonial Creekside – indoor pool, ensuite bathrooms, private in-room dining, 2/3 acre city property, 10 minutes from campus. Ideal for weddings/ parents visiting/graduate students for longer term stays. Special rates available. 519-886-2726 ; www.bbcanada. com/11599.html.

SERVICES

Core 2 Computing – we are a new retail computer sales and service company located at 92 King Street, S, second floor, Waterloo. We provide excellent service, fantastic prices and house calls for home networking. Call 519-9542935. Does your thesis or major paper need a fresh pair of eyes to catch English spelling and grammar errors? Thesis English editing, $50/hour. Five business day turnaround. Neal Moogk-Soulis, ncmoogks@uwaterloo.ca.

HOUSING

Attention Cambridge School of Architecture students! Live conveniently and comfortably right across the street from school in this beautifully renovated apartment. 4, 8 and 12-month leases available with excellent signing bonuses and rental incentives! Call Joanne at 519-746-1411 for more details. Room for rent for a quiet individual in a detached home near both universi-

ties. Parking and all amenities. Please call 519-725-5348.

HELP WANTED

Weekend counsellors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Minimum

transdiscliplinary team (including UW students) dedicated to helping current Crown Ward youth. Please contact Kelly Anthony at 519-888-4567, ext 32802. Paid position. Excellent exchange opportunity for UW undergraduate students to participate in the Ontario/Jiangsu Student Exchange Program in China for the 2009-2010 academic years. The OJS Program provides scholarships to successful applicants. For additional information and application form/deadlines contact Andreea Ciucurita, Waterloo International, Needles Hall, 1101, room 1103, ext 35995 or by email: aciucurita@uwaterloo.ca. Tune in to Sound 100.3 FM radio to hear DJ Cool with lots of music, entertainment, helpful info, weather and more. www.soundfm.ca >listen or www.ckmsfm.ca. Heart and Stroke Row for Heart – learn to row this summer while you raise funds for life-saving heart disease and stroke research. The eight week program begins June 22 to August 15, with the end fun-filled “Row for Heart Regatta” at Laurel Creek. For times/ fee, etc call 519-571-9600 or cgies@ hsf.on.ca. Alternatives Journal is looking for the following work study positions – publishing intern ; marketing and business and web design and management. Email resume/cover letter to marcia@ alternativesjournal.ca.

STUDENT AWARDS FINANCIAL AID June 2009 June 3, 2009: Last day to submit OSAP Reinstatement Form to add Spring term to Fall only term. June 3, 2009: OSAP Application Deadline for Spring only term. June 3, 2009: Deadline to submit OSAP Signature Pages and Supporting Documentation for Spring only term. June 15, 2009: Recommended submission date for 2009/2010 OSAP Application for the Fall term. June 19, 2009: Deadline for OSAP Reviews (appeals) for Spring term. June 30, 2009: Last day to submit FullTime Bursary/Award Application for Spring term. -For all in person inquiries, your SIN card and government issued photo id are required. Refer to our website: safa. uwaterloo.ca for full listing of scholarships and Awards.

eight-month commitment. Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, KW Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, Kitchener, ON, N2G 3V2.

Frosh editor assistant needed for Imprint’s Frosh issue of the 2009-2010 school year. July 6 to August 28, 35 hours per week, $11 per hour. The job entails organizing volunteer story lists, layout and production of the Frosh paper, reporting to the Editor-in-Chief. Must have excellent communication/ people skills, organization skills and desktop publishing knowledge. For more info and/or resume submission, email editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca or call 519-888-4048

BUY YOUR PRINCESS CINEMA MOVIE ADMISSIONS AT THE TURNKEY DESK AT A DISCOUNTED RATE! 6 Princess St. W. • 46 King St. N., Waterloo • 885-2950 www.princesscinemas.com


Sports & Living Athletics gets new associate director “

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009 sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Christine exemplifies the qualities we were looking for in this position, including highly developed leadership and coaching skills and a track record of accomplishment. She is a winner. Julea Gelfand intern

C

courtesy uw athletics

Christine Stapleton is UW’s new associate director of athletics.

hristine Stapleton was appointed the new Associate Director of Athletics on May 14, 2009. With Stapleton’s background, it’s easy to trust her with such a big commitment. Having over 23 of experience as an athlete, coach, and administrator, Stapleton is no stranger to hard work. She’s the women’s head coach of the National Elite Development Academy (NEDA), which is a national training program centered in Hamilton for the best 12 male and female athletes from across Canada between the ages of 15 and 18. She also played on Laurentian University’s basketball team, back-to-back national championships in 1990 and 1991, and into her introduc-

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tion into the Laurentian Hall of Fame in 2005, which initiated an equally successful coaching career. Stapleton was the Assistant Athletics Director at the University of Regina from 1994-1998. She then coached the women’s basketball team to the 2001 CIAU National Championship and earned Coach of the Year Honours in 1996. In 2001 Stapleton received the eminent 3M Canadian High Performance Coach of the Year award. Stapleton then made Canadian basketball history by leading the 2004 Junior Women’s National Team to its first-ever FIBA World Championship, a fact touted by UW’s athletics department. Stapleton will be responsible for leading and managing the entire interuniversity side of athletics, including UW’s 31 interuniversity teams,

over 560 student-athletes, and over 80 coaches. She will also be responsible for seven-full-time coaches, one full-time athletic therapist, one full-time communications co-coordinator, and approximately 75 part-time coaches from the UW community. The development of overall strategy and leadership for the department will also be placed into Stapleton’s hands, but Director of Athletics, Bob Copeland , has faith that she will exceed expectations. “Christine will be a tremendous asset for athletics and will provide valuable leadership for our coaches, studentathletes and the department as a whole. She is a highly qualified level four certified coach with national and international experience that will help guide our coaches in developing their programs to

Allstar Athletes Detailing UW’s athletes who made it to OUA level teams Julea Gelfand intern

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achieve excellence.” He added, “This involves a range of important responsibilities including mentorship, program benchmarking, and developing plans that assist coaches including many aspects such as recruiting, fundraising, strategic planning, and athlete development.” Stapleton has her work cut out for her, but her exceptional communication skills and various experience has lead her to this position in the first place. Copeland states, “Christine exemplifies the qualities we were looking for in this position, including highly developed leadership and coaching skills and a track record of accomplishment. She is a winner.” Stapleton still has a couple more weeks to prepare for the long road ahead but expect great things from her.

F

all 2008 and Fall 2009 spelled success for UW athletes, as many are making it to OUA All-Star level teams. November 19, 2008 was where it all started. Raphael Goldemann and Mohammed Aborig from UW’s men’s soccer team were both named to OUA’s 2nd team All-Star. The following day, Mike Glinka, Elliot Shrive, Travis Hendry and Jason DinizWood were named as OUA All-Stars basketball players. More recently, on February 12, 2009, a very assertive Eric Dingle capped off a dominant season of squash with OUA Male Player of the Year. This was Dingle’s third year winning the prestigious award. UW’s female athletes also joined their fellow male students in the spotlight. In women’s soccer, Kelsey Abbott and Catherine Vanderburgh who were both named second team All-Stars for OUA’s women’s soccer, and Caitlin Martin and Nicola Holmes who were consistent veteran players were named first team All-Stars for OUA’s women’s rugby. March 2009 brought great victories and nominations

as three outstanding women were noticed for their efforts in women’s volleyball. Firstly, Kate Flanagan — one of the largest offensive threats was named to OUA’s first All-Star team. Bojana Josipovic was named to OUA’s second team All-Star for the third year in a row. Josipovic is co-captain and in the top ten in OUA standings for her total attack attempts. Lastly, from women’s volleyball was the unrelenting Laura Klein to the all-rookie team because of her abilities in back court defense. Typically UW is associated with overly studious students, however there is impressive talent in our sports teams, which the OUA has continuously recognized. Great talent has been cultivated on campus and given guidance and encouragement by UW’s coaching staff. They deserve much recognition for their tireless efforts and willingness to overcome any hurdle their teams or players face. One example of the many excellent coaching staff is, crosscountry assistant coach Stephen Drew, who was a two-time CIS All-Canadian (1999-2000, 2000-2001) for UW. He takes this experience and his dogged work ethic and applies it to his coaching.


Comics & Distractions

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

19

Crossword By Ted Fleming (tfleming@imprint.uwaterloo.ca) Across

1

1. Oil drilling apparatus 4. Establishment providing manicures, pedicures, exfoliation, etc. 7. Overly correct or proper 11. Famous steak sauce 12. Quality of being overly particular 13. Brief summary 15. To come to a final conclusion 17. Alpha through ______ 18. Estimated time of arrival 19. City separating Muskoka and Haliburton County 21. Of or pertaining to him 22. Mountain ___ Code Red 23. Joey’s ____ restaurant 24. Processed data (abbr.) 27. Turn, in game theory 28. Mark left by a flame 30. Host city of the Taj Mahal 33. Remove from the ground through digging 36. Past participle of wake 38. Dutch farmer who lives in South Africa 39. Prefix for ten 40. Adjective meaning dry or withered 41. Calf length pants namesake 43. ___ we forget 45. Novice 46. Draw aimlessly 48. Jazz legend: ___ Charles 50. Covered walkway in Ancient Greek architecture 51. Religious group from The Da Vinci Code: ____ Dei 53. To surrender in UFC: “___ out.” 56. In physics: a state of matter 58. Wood sugar 60. “You ___ not alone” 61. Command and Conquer: Red _____ 64. Exxon Valdez was this type of vessel (2 wds.) 66. One pretending to be part of another social group 67. Reasons for sadness 68. Swine grunt 69. Annual ESPN Award 70. Hallucinogen (abbr.) 71. The human genome project maps ___ (abbr.)

2

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7 9 8 1

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33

38 42 46

34

25

58 63

66 69

37 40

44 48 51

62

26

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47

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61

By Felicia Rahaman & Paula Trelinska

29

35

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50 56

Professors are now required to provide course outlines. What else should professors be mandated to provide?

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10

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45 49

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1. “Let’s hit up Yahoo Maps to find the dopest ______.” 2. Family member related through marriage 3. Rare stone 4. Noise made by an angry dog 5. Short for Patricia 6. Sailing term: on the leeward side 7. Skill level above amateur 8. Deepest level of sleep (abbr.) 9. Canadian unofficial national sport (2 wds.) 10. Greek root word for “magician” 11. Got 100 per cent 12. Fictitious name 14. Faux ___ 16. Kris Allen is America’s ____ 20. ___ Tac 25. Prequel to Apocalypse Later: Apocalypse ___ 26. Adjective describing a winter morning 27. Pirate’s pet 28. Slang for seconds 29. German for “Mr.” 30. “___, easy as 123.” 31. Nag or provoke

55

Andrew Moull Poli. Sci. Shivam Ohri Science

60

64

Down

54

“Free food in every class.”

32. The act of a bank taking someone’s car 34. An engine running at its lowest RPM. 35. Born (French) 37. Prefix meaning new 42. Brian Adams song: “Everything __” (2 wds.) 44. Properties managed for someone else 47. Easygoing, to a fault 49. A body of water smaller than an ocean, but larger than a lake (2 wds.) 51. Miscellaneous collections of literature 52. Propelled a boat with a stick 53. “TCB: _____’ care of business.” — Cosmo Kramer 54. Building for watching sports 55. Coffee shop from Friends: Central ____ 56. Clothier owning Old Navy and Banana Republic 57. Sunburn ointment 59. Complain or protest 62. One contraction in weight lifting 63. “Touch down” in rugby 65. Non-verbal “bro” greeting

“ “

Natalie Dierx

Rami Finkelshtein

2B Environment & Resource Studies

3A Actuarial Science

“They should provide more guidelines on plagiarism.”

Provide all lecture notes at the beginning of term.” Chong Pei Fen Mathematics

Provide grades promptly on ACE.” Guang Hu He 1B Mathematics

To T. the girl who randomly asked me to go canoeing the Grand River: I am sorry I didnt make it; it was too late when I went to get the ticket... they were all sold out already! Imprint has my email address. Get in touch and let’s go for coffee sometime! From: L. To my sweet chocolate pastry: My blood sugar took a spike that time we both asked about the sugar content of that chocolate bun at the CnD. I could use some more of your sweetness. Fill me up buttercup, Your vanilla cupcake

“Show up to class on time.”

Be more flexible for students, [...] always explain materials and provide examples.” Ali Basahi

Master of Finance

Take their pants off.” Stacey Baker 2B Arts

To the guy with the fuschia Dell computer in HRM 200: We had a moment when I dropped my cellphone and you passed it back to me. You joked about me being cutely clumsy. I’m sorry I didn’t respond to your flirting but I felt a sudden wave of shyness. I think you are delicious and witty. I hope to see you in class again... I won’t be so shy this time ;) Txt you later, b.b Pearl girl Dear Allie Einstien: You’re an object in motion that just hit a wall. Rejected. That’s physics, baby. Guy in newly minted lab coat

Missed any connections lately? Got any ideas, gripes, or randomly entertaining thoughts? Send them (with utmost affection) to

distractions@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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Dear loyal, forgiving, and really, really good-looking readers, Okay, okay, we’re sorry. We’ll admit that the Distractions section last week was more disturbing than distracting. The crossword was riddled with errors, we forgot the Sudoku, and our programming is terrible. Rest assured, those horrible crimes will go unpunished. What we will do however, is throw in an extra Sudoku, because that’s how much we love you. Cool? (I need you to be cool. Are you cool?) xoxo. Distractions Editor


20

Comics & Distractions

Imprint, Friday, May 29, 2009

Peter n. trinh

GEOFFREY LEE & SONIA LEE

RAJUL SALEH


Imprint_2009-05-29_v32_i03