Imprint_2005-05-20_v28_i02

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Indie rockers invade UW

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

IMPRINT

Stuff this in your pepper

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A record label plays Grad House, page 10

UN I V E R S IT Y O F WAT E R L O O ST U D E N T NE W S PA P E R

MAY 20 , 2005

Jeff Anstett shares his recipe for grilled peppers , page 8

VO L 28, NO 2

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I M P R I N T . U WAT E R L O O . C A

Nanites threaten campus green Jacqueline McKoy IMPRINT STAFF

CONTRIBUTED PHOTO

Students face off in campus rec’s Division A soccer at Columbia Ice Fields Wednesday evening.

University proposes another student fee Sam Brown SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

No one likes to wait in line, and this is especially true when the wait is for a mandatory document needed to solidify a job offer or to obtain muchneeded funding for school. The Ancilliary Student Fee (ASF), which has been proposed by the university’s Academic Services, is part of an attempt to streamline this process. The fee is part of a plan which would allow unlimited and more convenient access to

student documents, both undergraduate and graduate. The proposal is one of several alternatives proposed to make life a little easier on the student body. Ultimately, the final decision is to be made by the student population through Feds representation. The final goal is to allow students to order official documents via the internet. This would allow easier access to services including official transcripts (including those ordered through OUAC and ones needed for award competitions), “To Whom It May

Concern” letters and letters of permission and verifications (for RESP and scholarship trust forms). The ASF would create a one-time payment for all documents, allowing unlimited lifetime access to such services. If accepted, students can expect to see the increase in tuition as early as this Fall, and will pay each successive academic term. A full-time undergraduate student can expect to see an additional $6.50 charge; a parttime undergraduate $2.00. See FEE, page 4

A favourite Frisbee field in the middle of UW’s campus may soon be home to a centre for nanotechnology and quantum computing, a scenario leaving student councillors at odds with university administration. The green, located between Biology 2, MC and the SLC, is a proposed site for the new QuantumNanotechnology building, which will act as both an expanded site for the university’s Institute for Quantum Computing (IQC) and the faculty of engineering’s nanotechnology program, which admits its first students this September. The possible construction of this building, however, has been met with increasing protest from student leaders. Feds councillors Ian MacKinnon and Matt Strickland, of mathematics and engineering respectively, plan to rally Feds to dispute the administration’s choice of location for the nanotech building. Councillor MacKinnon noted that “Councillor Strickland and [himself] will be tabling a resolution that Feds be against the construction of the nanotech building on the B2 green at the next [student] council meeting.” The councillors’ opposition toward the construction of the nanotech building is mainly based on the fact that students have not been adequately informed about the future of the B2 green. The idea of this building has been in the administration’s consciousness since May of 2004, when RIM founder and UW Chancellor Mike Lazaridis and wife Ophelia donated $33.3 million to the IQC; this donation was matched by both the university and the government to provide $100 million to IQC, some of which was earmarked for a new research facility to be built near East Campus Hall. A year later, the Lazaridises donated an extra $17.2 million to further help fund the construction of the new IQC building, which was also slated to house nanotechnology engineering. On May 5, 2005, a sidebar in the Daily Bulletin reported that the building would be situated west of the Peter Russell Rock Garden, between MC and Biology 2 — in other words, on the B2 green. This news quietly entered student life last week, when a sign reading “Don’t pave me over” appeared on the green and

when mathNEWS reported on the subject last Friday. MacKinnon noticed that his and Strickland’s constituents did not generally seem aware of the future of the green, and they are planning to launch an awareness campaign to pique students’ concern over the issue. The councillors, however, are sympathetic to Waterloo’s need for expansion. Matt Strickland commented that “the university administration is just delaying the inevitable. UW is going to continue to expand, and this will translate into a need for more buildings. The issue at hand is whether we start building on north and east campus now or we wait until all green space on main campus is gone.” Both councillors agreed that choosing to further develop the vast north campus or the area surrounding East Campus Hall would be in the best interest of students as it would help to preserve the valuable and enjoyable green space throughout the south campus. Feds Student Council will hold its next meeting on Sunday, June 5 at the architecture building in Cambridge. The Feds executive will then report the results of any relevant motions at the next board of governors meeting on Tuesday, June 7. Contact information for all Feds councillors can be found at http:// www.feds.ca/government/ student_council.html. jmckoy@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Feds By-Election Info Undergrad math students can elect two Student Councillors in a by-election on Friday, May 27 outside the C&D in MC or in the DC Grad Lobby, 8am-8pm; the candidates are: Khalil Andani Ahmed Farrakha Lianchong Zhu Nominations are still open for vacancies in these faculties/colleges (1 vacancy unless noted): Engineering (2 vacancies) Independent Studies Architecture Renison Optometry Contact Brandon Sweet, Chief Electoral Officer, x6781/Feds office for more information.


IMPRINT

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If you could have one super power, what would it be and why? by Salim Eteer & Darren Hutz

“Yes.” Jason Wang

“Precognition — for the stock market.”

3A math

Ross Tang 2B math/accounting

“To fly — so I could mess with physics students.”

“The ability to slash prices.”

Laura Capancini

3B psychology

Lisa Carswell

1B math

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

Neal Moogk-Soulis

1

CROSSWORD

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Across 1. Colloquial father 6. Pat down 10. Wander 14. Lion noises 15. South African iris 16. The start of any fairy tale 17. 1 and -1 20. Proto-syrup 21. The cause of so much trouble 22. Precede effects 23. Old-style even 25. Goals 26. British gas pump 33. Repeated refusals 34. Sharpness of vision 35. Jane Austen book 36. Poe’s middle name 38. Dark black goo 39. Jimmies open 40. Iranian currency 41. Rich decorations 43. Carrier of genetic information 44. Group homes 47. How to describe the Mediterranean 48. John Lennon’s widow 49. They’ll break your bones 52. Faulty human quality 54. A dog, rock or hamster 57. Tobacco rolling papers 61. The first Obi-Wan 62. Borrowed money 63. Riotous fight 64. Social pollinators 65. Mainstay craft fabric 66. A sailor at work

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Solution for May 6th, 2005

Down 1. Sidney Crosby next year? 2. Made a mistake! 3. Brother and Sister Bear’s father 4. Move forward 5. Heinie 6. South American monkey 7. Skating jump 8. Least amount

9. Dearth of water 10. Stronger bodied 11. Come before twos 12. Geographical unit 13. State of confusion 18. Ancient Greek style 19. Cass Elliott 24. Stylish elegance 25. Wander off the beaten path 26. Old manuscript 27. Second-largest global religious movement 28. South American beaverlike rodent 29. Hagrid’s mother 30. Organic compound 31. Circling crows 32. They’ll fly you to the moon 33. Beat cop who deals with dealers 37. The farmer’s ones are most accurate 39. Warcraft serf 41. Reflexive form of one 42. Short Aussie swim champion 45. Software audience

Mark Johnson

Jumble theme: Interesting newspaper headlines

C I T R U S

W R I E S T

P B L M E W A S D U A R K E

M R O A V A D E N C H A R H E R A U N R E N H Y S I A S T N E G G I N O L O S V E T E N A R N S

D I N G M O O I N G

E O A N S E E B D I B I T I R T H E T A L E M Y

P A L C A J U A L A N M E R G

S A R A N

O B E S E

F I R E T R S P A R A P I C K I M E C A T I N C S L E E

A D U L T E R Y

S E N

S C A P E S

S A L A D S

46. Little girl 49. Strike-breaker 50. Clay slab 51. S-curve moulding 52. And everyone else 53. Cult musical 55. Skinny fishes 56. Woody plant 58. Foot digit 59. America’s doctor lobby 60. Big body of salt water nmoogksoulis@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

WORD JUMBLE

“Invisibility — my reasons shouldn’t be printed in Imprint.”

“To generate an unlimited amount of cheese.”

Riyad Musbah & Reza Khanahmedi

Soo Go

1. “HOUSE ______ GAS TAX ONTO SENATE” A P E S S S

5. “CHILD’S STOOL GREAT FOR USE IN ______” N A G E D R

2. “QUEEN MARY HAVING BOTTOM ______” S P A R E D C

6. “______ WILL HEAR CAR TALK AT NOON” R E E L S A D

3. “NEW JERSEY ______ TO RULE ON NUDE BEACH” G D E J U

7. “______ ARE PRODUCTIVE, BUT DEATH CUTS EFFICIENCY” R E K M O S S

4. “DR. RUTH TO TALK ABOUT SEX WITH NEWSPAPER ______” S I T D O R E

8. “______ PREDICT WORLD DIDN’T END YESTERDAY” Y H I C C P S S

4B math

3A electrical engineering

Kristen Person

“X-Ray vision — for obvious Final Quotation: reasons.”

4A biomedical science

Jeff Taylor

“Grow money trees.”

2B accounting

“STIFF OPPOSITION EXPECTED TO ______ FUNERAL PLAN”

E V E


N EWS Feds executives on the spot IMPRINT NEWS

FRIDAY, MAY 6, 2005 FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

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news@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Christine Loureiro IMPRINT STAFF

John Andersen comes to Feds with a year’s experience under his belt. As the 2004–2005 vice president internal, this honours science student brought volunteer experience as Off Campus Dons coordinator and foundJohn Andersen ing member of the President Warrior Weekends committee to that role. Now, the knowledge and experience he gained as VPI will assist him in leading the new Feds executive. The coming year

Media centre: Approval has been given to place a 65” LCD screen in the Great Hall as part of a media center that will centralize information and make it easily available to students. “I’d like to see it come in in the next few months,” he said, adding that it will make movie nights and Warrior Weekends entertainment easier to co-ordinate.

Big challenges

Time management: “I don’t like working really, really late every day and I can’t tackle every issue,” said Andersen. “It’s gonna be hard to let things go.” Diversifying revenue: Andersen and vice president of administration and finance Carmen Lam are looking at ways to “trap” student money that is spent off-campus. For example, while UW has an exclusive banking agreement with CIBC, other student governments receive approximately $100,000 annually to place bank machines, instead of full branches, on their campus. Although the goal is not to compete with existing campus businesses, Andersen says, “We need to explore those activities and work around agreements, set up a framework for when those contracts expire.” On Leadership

“I’m familiar with some leadership characteristics but that would be just rhyming them off,” Andersen said. “ I just want to do the best that I can … listen and take as much directive as there is out there.” Find John

Awareness: “Keep[ing] students generally apprised of big issues as they come up” is one initiative, said Andersen, citing attempts to inform students of and collect opinions about plans for a nanotech building on the B2 green. Although Feds has no voting authority on any university committees other than the SLC management board, they will “try to influence as best we can.” Programming: Implementing a programming committee and beginning a budget committee review of programming, “to make sure our dollars go as far as they can,” are two priorities. Tied to this is solidifying the structure and involvement of UW events group The Crew, which is “quintessential to student involvement.”

The easiest way to reach Andersen is by e-mail (pres@feds.uwaterloo.ca) or by scheduling an Carmen Lam knows appointment. her experience as cofounder of Asian FOCUS, a non-profit interuniversity organization, will help in her new role. The economics student didn’t know much about clubs and constitutions when she began Carmen Lam the group in 2002 the VP Admin & research skills she learned then, and her Finance

background in accounting, will help her in the coming year. Mark Stratford

The coming year

IMPRINT STAFF

Refundable fees: The feasibility of a new refundable fees system is something Lam plans to research, looking to other universities for ideas. She would like to “work out something the students and UW admin would be happy with.” Big challenges

Feds’ businesses: “Looking into Fed Hall and seeing how that can be improved upon” is an ongoing task, as is the “long-term feasibility of all the businesses.” Students can also look for a business plan competition. “We have a lot of bright business-background students,” she continued, who can “bring some fresh ideas into the organization.” Dental plan: When former VPAF Raveel Afzaal was unable to return from his visit to Pakistan in January, some loose ends remained in his portfolio, including plans for undergrad dental coverage. “Hopefully that can be in place for September,” she said, adding that a lot of work needs to be done “now that we know the students want it.”

May is Sexual Assault Awareness Month and as women’s centres across Ontario bring attention to the growing problem of date rape drugs, UW officials say it’s not an issue here. The Federation of Students is concerned about students’ safety but do not think the risk of date rape drugs at Fed Hall or the Bomber are currently a concern. “[There are] programs to ensure that our staff is well trained to look out for situations such as the use of date rape drugs and other alcohol-related incidents,” said Carmen Lam, vice-president of administration and finance with Feds. She said that orientation leaders are taught to look out for the use of drugs and other symptoms. Education programs are held for students during orientation. In recognition of Sexual Assault Awareness Month, the Kitchener-Waterloo Sexual Assault Support Centre (KWSASC) and the Waterloo Region Sexual Assault & Domestic Violence Treatment Centre (SADVTC) are organizing a speaker event entitled “The Legal System, Safety

and Date Rape Drugs.” The event will take place on May 25, from 12 p.m. to 1 p.m. at the Catholic Family Counselling Centre, 400 Queen St. S. Speakers will include Sgt. Cory Thompson from the major case unit for investigating sexual assault and Sue Gallagher, a social worker at SADVTC, who will educate the community on safety, drugs and alcohol. “About one-third of the victims of sexual assault cases we have seen are under the age of 21,” said Casey Cruikshank, director of the SADVTC. “Each year we give the residence dons at the University of Waterloo a tour at the hospital and talk to them about sexual assault.” The organization is part of Kitchener’s St. Mary’s Hospital. It has doctors, nurses and social workers on-call 24 hours a day whenever a sexual assault victim is sent to emergency. They provide support to victims, assist in collecting evidence if police are involved, give medial help such as pregnancy and STD preventions and other follow-ups. Samples are sent to the Centre for Forensic Science in Toronto for further analysis. One of the most commonly used date rape drugs in the U.S. is Rohypnol — a pill that can

A new study conducted by researchers from the universities of Virginia and Washington has found a correlation between popularity in junior high school students and their propensity for experimenting with alcohol, drugs and unruly behaviour. Following 185 Grade 7 and 8 students for a year, they found more popular kids had more self-esteem and were closer to their parents than their less popular peers, they were also three times more likely to dabble in drugs and drinking. Also, popular kids with troublesome peers showed the highest likelihood of being led into such dangers as vandalism and shoplifting. Popular junkie thieves versus sober pariahs? Gotta love high school! Canada

“I try to learn as much as I can from [another] person,” Carmen said. “It’s a two-way thing. You learn from me, I learn from you.”

First prize at the largest science fair in the world was awarded last Saturday to a Grade 11 student from LaSalle, Ontario. Chet Gervais won the Grand Award in medicine and health at the Intel International Science and Engineering Fair in Phoenix, Arizona for his prototype of an ultrasound mammogram system that provides 3-D high resolution images useful for breast cancer screening. Gervais received $4,128 in prize money, which is ironic, since for most Grade 11 boys, focusing on breasts is its own reward.

Find Carmen

International

“Students can always e-mail or call me,” she said. “I’m usually in the office.” Carmen’s e-mail address is vpaf@feds.uwaterloo.ca; her phone number is 888-4567 ext. 3880.

As Lisa Simpson quipped when Bart got an earring, “How rebellious … in a conformist sort of way.” This mentality is now plaguing the world’s tattoo artist population. Tattoo practitioners from a dozen different countries gathered at a convention in New York last Saturday, where they pondered if the once-taboo act of getting a tattoo was losing its conformity-baiting purpose. Some reports state that approximately 20 per cent of Americans aged 18 to 25 are getting inked, with males and females fairly evenly split. More middle-agers and highly paid professionals are getting them, and some practitioners have stopped making “art” and now only do the work to make money. Said professional tattoo photographer Charles Gatewood, “It was like a club, a secret society and family. Now it’s gotten commercialized, co-opted and watered down …

On leadership

See FEDS EXECUTIVE, page 5

Community highlights concern for date rape drugs Karen Chow SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

Universities/Colleges

dissolve in liquid. New pills turn blue when added to liquid, but older ones, with no colour, are still available. Other common date rape drugs include GHB (gamma-hydroxybutrate), which can taste salty and exists in different forms including an odourless and colourless liquid, white powder or pill, and Katemine, a white powder. Date rape drug victims usually experience memory loss, dizziness, blurred vision, confusion and loss of consciousness. Alcohol can worsen the effect. According to Cruikshank, among the samples analyzed by the Centre for Forensic Science in Toronto collected from victims, alcohol alone is the number one substance found. “Alcohol is cheap. It’s easily accessible,” said Cruikshank. “Other substances we have found include GHB, cocaine, and marijuana.” Currently there are no formal statistics on date rape and sexual assault incidences in the K-W area. Cruikshank said many victims have memory loss and cannot recall what happened and did not come forward. See DATE RAPE, page 4

Turning to the guaranteed-to-make-you-crossyour-legs side of the news … a Peruvian woman nearly bit off a man’s testicle during an attack last Monday night. Eleven men broke into Elizabeth Coz’ property with the intention of raping her and stealing her cattle. Instead, Coz handily defended herself by sinking her teeth into Hermogenes Meza’s scrotum, after which her relatives joined in the violence by stoning the men until they ran off. According to Hugo Jaime, a surgeon from a regional hospital, Meza “arrived with his right testicle dead and hanging by a thread… there was nothing to do but cut it off.” Thank you, McGruff the Crime Dog — “take a bite out of crime,” indeed. mstratford@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


4

IMPRINT NEWS

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

Power-hungry Tories will go Belinda-less Wow! What further proof could we require that the Alliance Conservatives are extremist right-wingers than the defection of one of the top authority figures in their party— a founding member and chief trade critic, rich, blonde, yummy mummy Belinda Stronach? The Conservative response? Along with a number of expletives, they questioned her intellectual depth and called her “something of a dipstick, an attractive one, but still a dipstick.” Very civil. Not only has this been a fatal blow to the Conservatives’ desperate at-

tempt to cast themselves as moderate, but it puts the Liberals and NDP one step closer to being able to form a coalition government. Just imagine: gone would be the days of the Liberals being held hostage by the Conservative/Bloc Québécois union! Stronach cited several reasons for her defection, among them that the right-leaning budget found popularity in her riding, but the Conservatives were opposing it. She is furious over Stephen Harper’s alliance with the separatist Bloc, fearing it endangers national unity and is just a cynical grab for power. In addition, Belinda is upset over the lack of civility that has stunted progress in the House of Commons, a disgraceful situation for which the Conservatives are chiefly responsible. Even former Conservative Prime Minister Brian Mulroney supported her decision to defect.

Love her or hate her, Belinda Stronach has put the good of the country first and foremost — and she deserves to be commended. She adamantly opposed the Tory/ Bloc alliance’s plan to force an election — one that Canadians don’t want. 58 per cent of Canadians, according to a recent Ipsos-Reid poll, believe the Tories want us to go to the polls because “they just want to be in power.” Canadians are puzzled that Harper accuses the Liberals of making a “deal with the devil” — referring to the NDP — while he is blatantly allied with the separatist enemies of Confederation, the Bloc Québécois. Propping up the Bloc is particularly dangerous since polling puts support for sovereignty in Québec at 55 per cent. An SES Research poll this week places the Conservatives in a distant second place within the key electoral

battleground of Ontario. The rankings are about the same as the results last June. What then is the point of a costly, wasteful and unnecessary election? Simply to again hand Stephen Harper’s Alliance Conservatives an embarrassing defeat? Taxpayers will be the big losers if we have an election. Not only will $300 million be wasted returning a Parliament likely to be virtually identical to the one we have now, but the fall of the government will also halt the passage of the excellent budget deal agreed upon by the NDP and the Liberals. Parliament hit a standstill last week, with the Conservatives desperately trying to shut things down so the budget — including money for cities and the provinces, huge tax cuts and funds for daycare, the military and the environment — does not get passed. Amid heavy criticism, they flip-flopped and now will let things go on, setting the

stage for a budget vote that will have occurred by the time you read this newspaper. After initially supporting the budget, the Tories soon changed their minds and opposed it. This week, they flip-flopped again, now declaring their support for the budget. And this party thinks they can govern? If we must go to the polls, it’s likely that Harper’s Conservatives will be again exposed as extremists and we’ll only see another Liberal minority government. This time, hopefully, with enough NDP MPs to form a coalition and actually make Parliament work. Stronach’s defection is a step in the right direction for Canadian politics, and hopefully this will be the start of a hemorrhage of progressive-minded members from the far-right, floundering Alliance Conservative Party. mjohnson@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Date rape: education essential for prevention Conitnued from page 3

Last year, the SADVTC alone treated 303 cases. The actual number could be higher. In fact, many of these crimes can be prevented through education and increased community awareness. Everybody knows you should not leave your drinks unattended. Don’t share drinks with others and if you taste or smell anything strange, don’t drink it. If you suspect you have been

drugged and raped, go to the hospital right away but don’t urinate, bathe or change clothes before getting help. This can destroy rape evidence. Always go out with a friend and help each other. Have a non-drinking friend with you to make sure nothing happens. If feeling dizzy and confused, always leave and go to the hospital. Although Lam said she believes students at the university are not at risk, they should still “keep vigilant” to protect themselves. “Students should always be aware of their sur-

roundings and avoid walking home alone at night,” said Lam. “Even if you have unexplained symptoms and you don’t know what’s wrong,” Cruikshank said, “you should still report to the emergency.” However, the most effective protection is still education. “We always talk about community awareness and care,” said Cruikshank, adding the most effective way to fight against and help stop sexual assaults is for everyone in the community to understand what it is and know how to prevent it.

Midnight Sun VIII rides into the sunset

COURTESY OF FORMULASUN.ORG

Waterloo’s Midnight Sun team travelled to Topeka, Kansas last weekend to compete in qualifying events for the NorthAmericanSolarChallengethatwillbeheldin July.Fromlefttoright:CameronBruce,FabianStiebert,Greg Thompson, Richard Li, Huy Le, Mashael Yazdanie.

Fee: review at several levels necessary Continued from cover

A full-time graduate student will see an extra $10 added to their tuition, and a part-time graduate student will see a $3 increase compared to the “as-needed” fees paid to the Registrar’s or Graduate Studies office ranging from $8.00 for an official transcript to $25 for a letter of permission. The technical aspect of the ASF proposal still needs to be reviewed by Feds. Currently, it is classified as a compulsory non-tuition- related ancillary fee, which is exempt from the ancillary fees protocol. It would be

reviewed annually by the Provost’s Advisory Committee on Student Fees (PACSF). A letter addressing Feds President John Andersen does not make any comment for or against the proposal, but states that “the university is bringing [the proposal] forward to Student Council for student input” and that he is yet to receive any ancilliary fees protocols as it is early in the process. If the proposal is declined, another alternative put forth by Academic Services is to allow an e-commerce purchase option when ordering documents covered by these services. This would

not eliminate the “per use” payment for such documents, but would still allow a more convenient way of obtaining important documents. The Registrar’s Office and Graduate Studies Office estimate that their revenue for providing the above services will be roughly $370,000 for this fiscal year. Historically, when an online service such as the suggested one has been offered at other universities an average 40 per cent increase in usage has been reported. To follow the process or for more information please visit http://www.sciborg.uwaterloo.ca/ ~rallie/feds/ASF_pro.pdf.


IMPRINT NEWS

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

5

Feds executives: Howie Bender and Lawrence Lam on the spot Howie Bender came to UW five years ago from Santa Cruz, Bolivia and plans to convocate this fall with a degree in political science. The former Arts Student Union president is also taking his role as student politician to a Howie Bender provincial level as VP Education treasurer for the Ontario Undergraduate Student Alliance, a student lobby group. The coming year

Lobby groups: Bender hopes to increase student awareness of OUSA and the Canadian Alliance of Student Associations. The recent increase in provincial education spending shows the power of these groups, he said. Tuition: “There is no set policy that addresses tuition after this freeze, so we don’t know what’s going to happen,” he said. One of his goals is “making sure tuition is predictable, regulated and ensures accessibility and affordability in the long run.” Co-op: Bender and Anderson are involved in an ongoing review of Co-operative Education and Career Services. “Recommendations that come out of this can provide CECS with useful information and orientation with regards to this student service … I think we’ll be seeing some good recommendations.”

“Co-op Students Council is open to all students at UW,” he stressed. Interested students should contact Bender for additional information. Big challenges

Tuition: “The first thing that comes to mind is working with the university and the province to ensure a tuition framework that is student friendly.” Government Affairs: “Making sure [the Government Affairs Commission is] a sustainable body that allows students to be connected to CASA and OUSA for years to come,” he said. The GAC, which operates to inform students about education i, has generated a “fair amount of interest.” Past VPED: “[Previous VPED] Jeff Henry did an amazing job,” he said. “If I can think of a challenge on a personal level it is to try and fill the shoes [Henry] left behind.” On leadership

“The first person that comes to mind is Woodrow Wilson,” Bender said about emulating a leadership style, calling Wilson a “true testament to working for what you believe in.” Find Howie

“... my door is always open,” he said. Students can also contact Bender via e-mail vped@feds.uwaterloo.ca or by phone at 8884567 ext. 2340.

Recent engineering grad Lawrence Lam brings his reputation of student involvement to the Feds. The former EngSoc academic rep believes his track record of consistently advocating student interests and his involvement as Lawrence Lam Feds councillor and VP Internal Internal Administration Committee co-founder will be a great help in this position. The coming Year

Clubs: Lam is encouraging collaboration between clubs and student societies, even ones students may not expect to see working together. “The Crew will be a good resource for this,” he told Imprint. IAC: The group Lam helped establish in 2003 to assist Feds vice-president internal with overseeing student groups will, this year, also review all student groups, including services and commissions, seeking student input for goal. Visibility: Through the redesign of its website and the introduction of a display case for club achievements in the SLC Great Hall (and some secret plans he didn’t wish to disclose), Feds is continuing to ensure its presence is visible. Big challenges

Fate of Fed Hall: The on-campus bar, according

to Lawrence, “[ is] bleeding money right now. Everything’s on the table. What’s important is that it’s a space that is increasingly valuable to students.” Embassy relations: “I’m interested in getting [the ESA] back on track,” he added. “Whatever bad blood they’ve had with Feds, we want to approach everything with a fresh perspective.” On leadership

Pope Benedict XVI’s leadership style stands out for Lawrence. “Some things that he said about being a listener, that’s the way I would like to come to decisions, by having everything on the table.” Find Lawrence

Students can find Lam in the Feds office, via email at vpin@feds.uwaterloo.ca or at 888-4567 ext. 3780. “If you bring me coffee, my door is definitely open,” he said, although he would still be willing to talk to students not bearing that familiar brown cup.

Editorial board positions available: Features Editor Sports Editor Systems Administrator Assistant Systems Administrator If interested come to Imprint (SLC 1116) Tuesday, May 24.


F EATURES Not your grandmother’s afternoon tea 6

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

IMPRINT FEATURES

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

Style sans selection!

Gimme back my sock you goat bastard — page 8

features@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Scott Houston IMPRINT STAFF

There’s a little shop in the University Plaza called Sweet Dreams that seems to be the place to be. Where else can you sit with your friends for hours and enjoy a cup of tea — with bubbles? But what the heck are these strange teas and why are there bubbles? How can the average person enjoy them? I did a little bit of research into this drink to find out about the hot and cold of it. The “bubbles” are in fact one of two things: tapioca pearls or flavoured jellies. The tea itself is actually a sweetened tea that is chilled and then shaken in a martini shaker, then served in a cup with the tapioca pearls or jellies. The tapioca pearls are the most popular; you can also choose a half-and-half mix. The process of choosing a tea is quite simple: first you choose your base — either a green, black or milk tea — then pick your flavour. If you are going to go with either black or green tea then you need to know that the black tea is stronger and the green tea allows you to taste the flavour more. Flavours are all across the scale from strawberry to jasmine. Jinny Song, an employee of Sweet Dreams said, “raspberry apple is a pretty popular flavour.” She also noted strawberry-lychee is a popular flavour as well. As for milk teas, taro, which has a sort of sweet yet indescribable flavour, and honeydew are the most popular flavourings. Since it is now summertime, cooler drinks will prevail, and Sweet Dreams has two popular variations

Sarah Evan is shaking up a tea while Phil Pilon tosses his shaker for show at Sweet Dreams. on their bubble teas that are sure to cool. Their icy swirls are milkshakelike drinks, with crushed ice and ice cream in addition to the flavour of your choice. Also, the icicle dreams are more slushy-like, made with just crushed ice and your choice of flavour. A vital part of enjoying your bubble tea is enjoying it with friends. Phill Pilon, another employee of Sweet Dreams, said the place has a

relaxing atmosphere. It’s a place where you can come with friends and chill for a few hours. Another good way to enjoy your bubble tea is with some of Sweet Dreams’ fine cuisine. Their fare includes dumplings, udon noodles, ramen and even sticky rice. You can go and have a nice meal and then follow it up with a game of Trivial Pursuit! Their most popular food is the shrimp and pork

It’s iced iced tea, baby

dumplings. Pilon recommends the following meal for first-time goers: a small taro or honeydew milk bubble tea, pork and shrimp or vegetarian dumplings with a dessert of succulent sponge toast or green tea ice cream. Any of the drinks (except the icy ones) are available hot or cold, and all drinks are available with or without the bubbles. Sweet Dreams is open seven days

Darren Hutz IMPRINT STAFF

I don’t know why we need a whole article on how to make iced tea, it’s easier than a CS 100 exam! A monkey could do it in his sleep ... his drunken sleep. Yeah, drunken simian sleep-cooking.… Ingredients: Nestea iced tea mix powder Water Directions: Add five heaping teaspoons of powder to five cups of water in a big jug. Serve. Ice optional.

Directions: Boil the water. Pour hot water over the teabags in a sealable thermos if possible. I usually just end up using a soup bowl with a dinner plate on top. Seal and steep the hell out of those teabags. Leave them for up to 20 minutes. Remove teabags, making sure to squeeze the water out of each one, then pour into a two-litre jug. Fill remainder of jug with water. Zest lemon! Use a lemon zester, or for us simple folk, a sharp knife. Zesting is cutting off tiny bits of the lemon rind which is full of flavourful citrus oil. Once you have about half a handful of rind, throw it in the jug and stir. Chill mixture. Serve over ice and lemon slices and add sugar to taste. One cocktail umbrella per glass. dhutz@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

a week from 11 a.m. (perfect for lunch) until 2 a.m. Also available for your imbibing pleasure are loose leaf teas both hot and chilled, shakes, smoothies, slushies and ice cream. So make your way to your local bubble tea shop (there are at least three in proximity to the University of Waterloo) and grab yourself some chilled goodness! shouston@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Off to the country

A simple recipe to solve a complicated summer thirst Ha! That isn’t real iced tea! In Canada, we are accustomed to getting what is known elsewhere as sweetened iced tea. If you go to the States and ask for an iced tea you will get something that tastes quite different than Brisk or Nestea. It will taste like exactly what iced tea sounds like it should taste: cold tea. Gross, right? Wrong. Real brewed iced tea is one of the most refreshing beverages on the entire planet rivaling even the pinkest of lemonades. The method to create the good stuff is slightly more complicated than the one I previously stated. No drink crystals here folks! Ingredients (actual): 4 tea bags (green or orange pekoe) 2 cups of water Ice cubes 1 lemon Sugar Tiny cocktail umbrellas

SCOTT HOUSTON

My first trip into the field was two days of culinary, linguistic, and personal adventure, mixed in with the kind of simple advertising drudgery common to most part-time sales jobs back home. Liz, who after nearly 10 weeks in Cambodia still loves to take photos of everything, would regularly shout at Kressna to stop the car so she could photograph a passing oxcart, a bigger oxcart, or a fishing boat as we crossed a bridge. I took advantage of the two native Khmer speakers with me to learn more of the language. Kressna, though obviously outgoing and humorous with his fellow Cambodians, often seemed

anxious about joining in our conversation, physically covering his mouth when he did. Arriving late in the first village, the chief had not yet assembled many people. While waiting, I amused and amazed the local children and parents by recording them on my digital camera. I was able to sneak away for a little while to watch a team of men assembling an ox-plow and yoke using simple hand tools. The demonstration itself consisted of us setting up a loudspeaker system on our pickup truck to play the radio ad for our filter, a re-writing of a traditional Khmer love song: Man: “Please will you marry me?” Woman: “No.” Man: “What if I purchase this waterpurifier…?” Woman: “Of course then I will marry you, for our children will be strong, healthy, and well-educated. I love you.” See COUNTRY, page 7


FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

IMPRINT FEATURES

7

Tuk-Tukkered out in Thailand Bianca Tong

IMPRINT STAFF

Skytrains, taxis and limousines are all options for the traveler in Bangkok, but none is quite as exciting as taking a tuk-tuk. These three-wheeled motorized rickshaws seem to belch their weight in blue-grey smoke as they putter around the city, carting around people to their destinations. Daring to try this alternative form of transportation, my four other travel companions and I squeezed into a tuk-tuk to head to the Chatuchak weekend market (a 35acre paradise for shoppers and bargain-seekers alike). We raced off into the smoggy traffic, weaving in and out of cars like we were the motorcycles and mopeds that could actually fit between them. Our driver must have been insane. He seemed to think it would be fun to stop and start randomly in midday four-lane traffic and at other times drive along with his arms fanned out, Titanic-style. Fifteen minutes later, after hair-raising swerving and lane-changing, we ended up at a gem-dealer. Apparently tuk-tuks get free gas if they bring unsuspecting tourists into these gem shops. Guidebooks and travel advisories had warned us of these scams to buy bulk gems for bargain prices. Being new graduates, funds weren’t exactly flowing, so we walked around, gave cursory smiles and hightailed it. The next day I found myself on my own and seriously shopped out. While my cohorts treated themselves to world-renowned Thai massages, I decided to explore Bangkok’s more cultural attractions. For 15 Thai baht (about 50 cents Canadian) I was ferried up the Chao Phraya river, one of the major waterways in Thailand. The river express boat that I was on operated exactly like a bus and stopped at various piers along the river. Tugboats chugged along, hauling up to

BAR FLIES

A tuk-tuk: Thailand crazy taxi. three barges laden with various materials while quicker longtailed boats zipped across the important waterway. I hopped off at the Tha Tien pier and walked to the Grand Palace, which once housed royal residences and Wat Pho, the Temple of the Reclining Buddha. The 46 meter long and 15 meter high gold plated Buddha is a depiction of moments before he dies and attains enlightenment, or nirvana. Wat Pho is also famous for its teachings of traditional Thai massage, of which stone etched instructions can be read and body reflexology can be learned. Having had a two-hour massage the day before, I greatly appreciated the skills of my masseuse. After having enough of exploring the compound and feeling like I hadn’t filled my cultural quota, I pulled out my map for guidance. I must’ve looked seriously confused, as I was approached by a tuk-tuk driver who promptly pointed out some must-see places. “I’ll take you around to see the Lucky Buddha!” he said excitedly. “You must see the

Ian Blechschmidt

BIANCA TONG

Golden Mountain,” as he gestured towards the symbol on my map. “No visit is complete without seeing the Marble Temple!” I eagerly lapped all this up and was quite surprised when he said it would only cost me 20 baht for him to take me around for two hours. “I like you,” he said. “You’re friendly, I make you good deal!” The tuk-tuk driver spoke decently good English and said he had been to Toronto, something that curiously put me at ease. So we went on our merry way, stopping at Bangkok City Hall, and a tiny temple with a lucky fat Buddha. There was a temple near by with monks milling about. Pictures of people hung on the walls. Most people in Thailand are cremated after three to seven days of funerary ceremonies and their ashes kept in a jar at temples. We paid our respects three times and continued on our way. I’d agreed to go to a fashion outlet; as my tuk-tuk driver had called it, knowing full well he was after the

tank of free gas. Having felt like I lucked out with finding an English speaking guide willing to take me around, I felt I could stand to look interested for a couple of minutes, hmm and haw, and be on my way. The “fashion outlet” turned out to be a fabric shop that did custommade suits. They had books of the latest designs from names like Escada and Gucci. Little did I know how aggressive the sales people could be. “How long is your stay madame? You’re leaving tomorrow? Your flight is in the afternoon? That’s ok, we can do a fitting for you now, and one tomorrow morning. Feel this material, look at these designs. Only $7,000 baht. It’s a steal!” My only escape was to walk out. I nearly gave the tuk-tuk driver a tongue lashing, but he merely shrugged and said, “You no want to buy, you don’t have to!” The Golden Mount was next, an impressive structure built by King Rama III, which was part of the Wat Srakes monastery. “Go take your time, I wait for you here,” he said. So I climbed some 300 steps to get to the top, where I was treated to some gorgeous views of the Thai capital. Inside the building atop the 80 metre high platform, is a relic of Buddha covered in gold leaf which the religious can apply at their will. Awed and inspired, I reflected on the influence of Buddhism and its tenets on the “Land of Smiles.” But alas, it did not last long. Upon my descent, my tuk-tuk driver was nowhere to be found. Told in broken English by another driver that he had left, citing “no time to wait”, I realized the deal was probably too good to be true. Still, I had not been scammed as many tourists are— we merely got what we wanted from each other. A free tour for me, and free gas for him.

some kind of Vaudeville show. I couldn’t understand a word of it, but the rhythm and the laughter were there At one point I was called upon to amuse the crowd by displaying the Khmer that Kimtheng had taught me. This gained some laughs. Some of the villagers, seeing my Tilley Hat, insisted on knowing how much I had paid for it. Although a gift I admitted that it cost about $50 US. Kimtheng pointed out that her hat had only cost $1 US. The farmers thought I was crazy telling me that a good new cow was only $40 US. There was no arguing with that. The trip was a success. We managed to promote the water purifiers enough to help our Red Cross partners begin to make inroads in Prey Veng province. For my part, I was able to learn a little bit about the conditions in rural Cambodia.

Mercedes-Benz SLR McLaren. Ferrari Enzo. Lamborghini Murcielago. Maserati MC12. Koenigsegg CCR. Choose your poison, then save your pennies. These five cars, as well as many others, all cost between $280,000 to $935,000 and there are cars in existence that cost even more. Some have been produced for years, others are relatively new. No matter what, each of them is a true super car. The Mercedes-Benz SLR McLaren, released to market for 2005, is a 617 horsepower sports car inspired by the Mercedes-Benz McLaren Formula One team’s success on the race track. An SLR is the only super car I’ve had extensive exposure to — and it doesn’t disappoint. The carbon-fibre structure of the car is sleek and sexy. The car was pulled out of storage for me to take a closer look. The black exterior reminded me of a real-life Batmobile. The first thing I did was pop the hood, where the supercharged Single Over Head Cam (SOHC) 24-valve V8 shone back at me. I couldn’t be so close to this car without going for a test drive, but I had to settle for the passenger seat. Driving through New York City in an SLR was exciting, but the highway was where the real fun began. Since I love fast cars, and everyone I know knows it, the driver decided to really let the car loose for the first time since he purchased it. I’ve driven a few fast street cars — BMW’s 645Ci, the Corvette Z06 and the Acura NSX. None of these cars compared to the power I felt as the SLR rocketed up the roadway, and the G-forces pushed me back into my seat. Even without driving, I could tell the car handled the highway’s curves just as beautifully as the black exterior shone. Why does this experience turn me on? For the same reason I want a new pair of $1,200 sandals this summer. I’m fascinated by the unattainable. In the case of a super car however, there’s more to it. Exotic design is one thing that makes these cars more attractive to me — next to my Civic, it is a masterful piece of artwork. Additionally, the powerful engines and capability of the vehicles to handle this power is the peak of street-legal automotive technology. A super car intrigues, and it’s what draws many people to auto shows every year. A new model attracts a horde of people to its display as they “oooh” and “ahh”over the car’s beauty, power and price tag. So the next time you see one of these cars driving down the street, step back for a moment and experience this piece of artwork for how amazing it truly is.

adamk@ewb.ca

kmcgregor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

btong@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Country: success Continued from page 6

Following this came the real proof with a live demonstration of the filter. Several women were interested, but were worried about justifying the $55 US cost to their husbands. A rural Cambodian family will likely earn between $125 US and $250 US per year depending on their harvest. Additionally, there were a few children in the group with thin frames and distended bellies which I normally associate with malnutrition. This is not just the case in rural Cambodia. On the second day we visited two villages, attracting a larger crowd and making a large volume of sales at each. We had refined our presentation, attracting larger numbers by holding the demonstrations before the worst of the day’s heat and handing out fliers to passing motorbikes, cyclists and pedestrians. By the end of the last village, Kimtheng and Kressna had their routine down to an art, cracking jokes like

Pinching pennies


IMPRINT FEATURES

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

8

Breaking free from the sins of flesh So here’s the perennial dilemma: you’ve been invited to a barbecue by a friend who doesn’t eat meat. You’re thinking “Who the devil throws a barbecue when they don’t eat meat?â€? It happens though, especially to me. My brother’s fiancĂŠe doesn’t eat a lot of meat, and I have an entire group of friends who eat no meat. So what do you bring to a barbecue hosted by a bunch of tree-hugging hippies? In honour of my herbivorous friends, especially my little buddy James, who first introduced me to grilled vegetables, I present, for your enjoyment, my recipe for stuffed peppers. Whether you’re humouring the hippies or feasting on flesh, throw a couple of these fiery bastards on the “barbieâ€? and see who says hi. When I make these, I usually mix up what kind of peppers I use. Red, yellow and orange peppers are sweet and less spicy. Green peppers are ordinary but affordable and spicy peppers are, well, spicy. I’ve tried this recipe

with smaller, spicier peppers and it works — but not as well. You can get a pack of all four coloured peppers (perfect for this recipe) at most grocery stores. To make four stuffed peppers, you’ll need: 1 cup of corn (canned or thawed) 3 tablespoons of butter ½ cup of chopped onion 2 cloves of garlic (finely chopped) 1 teaspoon of chili powder 2 teaspoons of parsley (half if using fresh parsley) 3 tablespoons of ground pepper (I add another blast from my spice weasel on top after the peppers are stuffed) 3 tablespoons of flour ½ teaspoon of salt 2 cups of cooked rice Slice the peppers like you would a pumpkin. I’ve had stuffed peppers before where they’re sliced in half top to bottom (so that they resemble potato skins) but when you’re making them on a barbecue, you want to keep the pepper intact so the fluids are sealed in and the heat is trapped. Once the tops are cut off of the peppers, mix the ingredients into a batter and spoon into the peppers. I usually add a dash of my favorite hot sauce (Frank’s Red Hot with Lime)

but depending on how spicy your chili powder is and how spicy you want it, you can skip this. Add another blast of pepper on top (or garnish with hot pepper rings, jalapeùo rings or lemon slices if you don’t like spiciness). Wrap each pepper in tinfoil. Make sure to leave a little bit of space at the top in order for some of the steam to escape. Place the peppers on the top rack of your barbecue. Let them bake while you’re cooking whatever else is on the grill. For a veggie barbecue, many people grill whole portabello mushrooms marinated in either a barbecue marinade or in raspberry vinaigrette dressing. Some even use the mushroom instead of a hamburger patty — crazy vegetarians. After about 20 minutes, peel back the tinfoil and take the lids (tops) off of the peppers. Move the peppers to the lower grill and let them cook until the mixture inside stops looking wet. Unwrap and enjoy. Cooking without meat, although scary at first, can really broaden your horizons. As a cook there are two very important lessons to learn here. Number 1: learn to cook for your audience. Since cooking is as much about presentation as taste, I consider

JEFF ANSTETT

Colourful stuffed peppers make a great addition to any barbecue. those eating my food to be an audience. If they’re not interested in blue rare steaks and lean cuts of pork, don’t bend over backward to filet the perfect flank steak. Lesson no. 2: the less you rely on meat, the more you’ll learn. Meat should be a main course, not a meal. No matter how easy it is to cook burgers and hot dogs, remember that

what makes a meal a meal is variety. Next time you’re grilling a juicy sirloin, throw a stuffed pepper, a baked potato or a marinated mushroom on with it and look past the sizzling animal flesh. The wonderful world of grilling is made up of more than one food group. janstett@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Amaze and baffle your friends with laundry day fashions

Darren Hutz IMPRINT STAFF

MARGARET MANSELL

Mismatched socks? Never! Think “exciting variety of socks�!

Got the laundry day blues? We’re all busy people and sometimes life is too hectic to set time aside to wash those grass-stained jeans or that stanky-ass undershirt. The mound of dirty clothing just keeps piling up until your hamper is overflowing and a sea of denim, cotton and corduroy forms a

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carpet on the floor of your bedroom. This we can put up with, but eventually that fateful morning comes when only the scraps of your once wondrous wardrobe remain but you still have places to go and people to see. This is hardly the end of the world! A limited supply of clothing makes finding the right outfit challenging but not impossible. Don’t let that random handful of rags you’re forced to wear get you down, flaunt them! Here are some ways I improvise on laundry day, with sexy results! Co-op suit Remember that brand spanking new suit you bought in first year to impress all those corporate executives on your four-month quest for power and wealth? Remember using it once, getting that job without air conditioning, licking envelopes in Grimsby, then swearing off co-op entirely and stashing it in the very back of the back of your closet? Crack it out again! Wearing a full suit or fancy dress to class or just to hang out will leave your friends in awe of your style. Beside you, even the handsomest hambone will look like a hobo. Full body bathrobe Toss it on right out of the shower and go! Hugh Hefner pioneered this showstopper, so while you won’t be an original, you will definitely turn heads. Make sure you use a strong waist strap to avoid indecency if you plan to go out in public. I like to wear a leather belt, but make sure it’s black. Brown belts and bathrobes are a little known fashion faux-pas.

Thanks, Grandma! Finally, an excuse to wear that T-shirt with a big picture of J.S. Bach or Winnie the Pooh on the front that you got for your birthday last year. Guys, combine that with that battered old suit jacket you bought for a dollar from Value Village for your Willy Loman costume last Halloween and those dusty jogging pants you use for painting and you’ll be outta sight! Friends will be so baffled by the sheer amount of poor taste you have, that they will assume you know what you’re doing. You will fall so low on the style-o-meter that you will circle around and be at the top again. Ladies can achieve the same effect by wearing a weird hat like a beret and safety pinning some denim scraps or wood chips to their pants. NHL swag I know by now most of us have given up on hockey. My official Sundin jersey is packed up in the garage. Though it may hurt you to do so, the absence of the normal level of Canadian hockey fanaticism makes sporting those once proud logos fresh and original for the first time in probably around 80 years. This is only a sample of the endless possibilities. You can try any combination of random shirts and pants and find something interesting, if not stylish by current fashion trends. Just remember — socks don’t have to match, pants don’t really matter and don’t think “boxers with a giant hole in the ass,� think “half-commando.� dhutz@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


IMPRINT FEATURES

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

9

SHOCK AND AWE

Stephen Dunscombe

Local benchmarks becoming antique

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Landmarks near historical monuments quickly becoming things of the past Neal Moogk-Soulis IMPRINT STAFF

“Benchmark� is not the buzzword that it used to be. A benchmark is a survey mark made on a monument having a known location and elevation, serving as a reference point for surveying. There are several of these benchmarks on campus including one “set horizontally on the concrete foundation of a metallic sign board reading “Columbia Lake Town Houses, University of Waterloo,� one at ground level near the entrance to that residence, and one somewhere in the vicinity of St. Paul’s College.

Benchmarks consist of brass caps, about seven centimetres in diameter that read “municipal benchmark� along with a number. The benchmark that we located, on the southwest corner of 160 Columbia St. W, may have also had geographic co-ordinates that were visible at one point in time. Benchmarks are a dying breed. They have been replaced by more up-todate tools, such as GPS systems that can pinpoint co-ordinates across a wide area rather than having to rely on the information contained on a brass plaque that, as we found, is often difficult to locate. The coordinates often make reference to landmarks like barns, street names or

Enjoy the

pavement edges that have since changed. The first person to locate the following benchmark (number 144) and send us a picture is eligible to receive a prize: “Brass cap on a 1.5 metre iron bar on the south side of Columbia Street 0.60 kilometres east of Westmount Road, at the southeast corner of entrance to ‘University of Waterloo student residences,’ 9.40 m south of edge of pavement of Columbia Street, 14.90 m east of edge of pavement of entrance to student residences and at ground level.� This will be the first of an occasional series about Waterloo landmarks. Be

NEAL MOOGK-SOULIS

Rarer and rarer: a Waterloo region benchmark sure to let us know if there’s a landmark that you’d like to know more about. nmoogksoulis@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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ARTS

10

IMPRINT ARTS

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Crony Records showcase at Grad House Kirill Levin IMPRINT STAFF

It might not be apparent that Waterloo has a thriving indie scene, but one need only look at Crony Records, to know that it couldn’t be further from the truth. Crony Records, established in 1998 by Angus Fraser and Brad Weber,has since grown to encompass ten bands Most of them are local, though some are from as far away as Vancouver. On Thursday, May 12, Crony was celebrating the launch of its new zine at the Grad House. First on stage was Montreal-based Bedbox, a.k.a. Paul Jantzi, performing his catchy power pop for the 20 or so people collected in the room at the time. The small size of the audience went seemingly unnoticed by Jantzi, and he did his best to give everybody their money’s worth. Just like a true entertainer, Jantzi saved the best for last — the final song featured the theremin, without a doubt the coolest instrument ever. By the time Tenth of May, Angus Fraser’s solo project, took the stage, the tiny room of the Grad House was packed. Unlike Bedbox, Angus’ music isn’t easily classified.

“I just make stuff, whatever’s in my head. It can come out as noise or it could be a pop song,” he said. As Fraser and his band moved from song to song, nothing could be certian, only one thing could truly be expected: guitarist Tony Salomone would interject in between songs to tell the audience how much he was enjoying the performance and that he just learned the songs three days ago. The unique musical stylings of Winter Equinox finished off the night. It is difficult to describe their sound but guitarist/keyboardist Lauren Yakiwchuk suggested “The genre of post-rock experimental, instrumental indie rock — oh and noise.” The band cites musicians such as Tortoise and Mogwai as its immediate influences and incorporates a flute, drum machine and a keyboard harmonica as well as traditional rock instruments to provide an atmospheric sound. Once the final crescendo died down, the band courtly thanked the audience and started packing up. All parties declared the event a resounding success. For more information on Crony Records and its artists visit www.cronyrecords.ca. klevin@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

KIRILL LEVIN

Winter Equinox (left to right: Lauren Yakiwchuk, Dan Roberts, Robyn Yakiwchuck and Brad Weber) was one of the featured acts in Crony Records’ showcase at the Grad House Thursday night.

Four chords of glory: secrets of pop music revealed!

Popular music or “pop” is not a genre. But, we’ll use that as the working definition of the type of music I am interested in talking about. Rock, heavy metal, trance, bluegrass and cool jazz are examples of genres. Pop, in contrast, is more of a zone into which other forms of music fall as more and more people start to listen. It is a lime-coloured light that falls on a band or CD; it takes on a certain

colour, but the style remains the same. Even the colour of pop has evolved over Western history. Beethoven was a pop musician; Count Basie was a pop musician. Their music reflected the broad genre preference for classical and swing music respectively. The only common thing between different periods of popularity is the fact that the majority of people are listening to that style. Pop does tend to take on various characteristics, with every phase. The most common one is currently simplicity. Historically, music creation and appreciation was something that often required a certain amount of wealth. Orchestras were expensive and performers and listeners were all of an educated class, giving composers

May 20-29 Distillery Jazz Festival -- various venues, Distillery District, Toronto 10th Waterloo County and area Quilt Festival at ECH Gallery I & II May 22 Closet Monster -- Club Wax, Kitchener Cathy Miller performing "A Quilter's World - An Evening Of Stories, Songs, & Quilts" (7:30 pm) -- Zion United Church, 32 Weber St. W., Kitchener May 25 Up and coming electronic rock group returns to KW to play a show at Starlight with other artists The Most Serene Republic and Michael O’Donnel May 26 Jeremy Fisher w/ Nathan Wiley -- Bombshelter, U of W

license to create complicated music. Not everyone could play or enjoy it. Through time however, pop music has become more and more accessible to the average person. These days, any idiot can pick up a guitar and form a band that people will not only like, but buy. The colour of modern pop songwriting has found its center: something I call the four chords of glory. G, D, e minor and C, or technically (in the key of G) root, dominant, relative minor and subdominant, are the most common chords in pop music. If you know these simple chords in order, you can play the following songs: “When I Come Around” by Green Day, “Closing Time” by

1. Roots Manuva 2. Hangedup 3. Iron Bitchface 4. Caribou 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.

Mice Parade Neil Young Hrsta Chixdiggit! Yo La Tengo The Mountain Goats

Semisonic, “Glycerine” by Bush, “Rockabye” by Shaun Mullins, “The Sign” by Ace of Base, “Let Her Cry” by Hootie and the list goes on almost indefinitely. Knowledge of four chords unlocks a vast wealth of material. And that is only songs in the key of G. Most people don’t know the root chord in the key of A major from an A augmented chord (Do you?). This unlocks even more songs that use the same chord progression in a different key. Try some Blink 182! “What’s My Age Again” and “Dammit” are just two out of at least 30 Blink 182 songs that use the four chords of glory. Ok, now that we know some songs that go G, D, e minor, C, in that

Awfully Deep Clatter For Control Enter The Goatheaded God The Milk Of Human Kindness Bem-Vinda Vontade Greatest Hits Stem Stem In Electro Pink Razors Prisoners Of Love The Sunset Tree

order, try mixing the order up! You can play “Save Tonight” by Eagle Eye Cherry (in all of his grace) with e minor, C, G and then D. The possibilities are damned near endless! Pop likes to be simple. People like to hear stuff that sounds familiar to them and the North American music industry loves to keep pumping it out. With a little chutzpah and some lyrics, anybody can write a song that will make angst-ridden teenaged girls and boys cry. Bands like Simple Plan and Avril Lavigne make their careers just on the strength of four simple, simple chords. Learn them. Make your friends think you are a genius. dhutz@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

– What song was Weezer’s first number one hit? – What two famous T.V. shows have feature films being released this summer? – True or False: The O.C. is the greatest show on T.V. – Name any Jack Black movie? – On a scale of one to ten how disgusting is the whole Katie Holmes/ Tom Cruise ploy for attention? – How many Juno awards have The Tea Party won? Submit your answers to arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca before for a chance to win free CDs. Last week’s answers: 1. Bruce 2.none 3. True 4. There are no awesome Limp Bizkit songs 5. Michael Bolton did not reshape modern contemporary music, only his hairstyle. 6. One by U2 7.Yes


IMPRINT ARTS

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

11

UW Drama student performs with Shakespeare by the Sea Amanda Kind IMPRINT STAFF

Seasoned actors all say the same thing, if you can see yourself being happy doing anything else but acting, do it because the entertainment business is grueling. The successful Hollywood and Broadway actors raking in hundreds of thousands of dollars make up only two per cent of actors. For the other 98 per cent, success often translates to working steadily for up to six months of the year and juggling several other jobs in order to pay the bills. Competition for jobs is fierce and with all the training programs in Ontario churning out an average of 60 students every April, the chances of landing a summer contract in theatre are minute, especially if you are not from the high-profile, well-connected conservatory programs like Sheridan and Ryerson. Although the University of Waterloo offers drama under the umbrella of

a liberal arts program, its current students and graduates are making their mark in the industry. The summer of 2005 has been a particularly difficult season for garnering a contract. With the early closure of Mirvish’s The Producers and Hairspray and the need for festivals to downsize their number of company members, it has become harder and harder to break into Canada’s theatre scene as a newcomer. With this in mind, it is even more impressive that UW Drama student Greg Carere has landed a contract with the Shakespeare by the Sea theatre company in Halifax, Nova Scotia this summer. This will be the first professional acting job for Carere and he will play multiple roles in the season which includes Pericles, The Merchant of Venice and midnight performances of Twelfth Night. Although the company primarily presents works by the Bard, they also present a fairytale each season; this season’s being The Adventures of Robin Hood. The

Does God listen to music?

I’ve been sick for the past week, like really sick. Fever above 40 degrees sick. And when you’re that sick, you get delirious. So delirious that your dreams either consist of you joining paramilitary groups in Central America or talking directly to God. And when you talk to God, what are you going to talk about? Sex? Nope — too touchy. Drugs? Hell no. Rock and roll? Well, now that’s a possibility — you could talk to God about music. And really, what music does God listen to? Does he listen to rock or bubblegum pop? How long has God been listening to music for? Luckily, my delirious sub-conscious decided to find all the answers for me — who needs your real conscious when your other one does just fine? So, from what I gathered, before the 20th century, God was stuck listening to a bunch of medieval tunes, some oratorio numbers and the occasional cherubic angel crooning in His ears. Not very fun, apparently. Understandably, God was pretty bored — there’s only so much gospel music around that one can stomach, especially if it’s all about praising yourself. Let’s fast forward to the ‘50s (and pretend that no good music came out during the early part of the century), where God develops a secret crush on Elvis and, like the rest of America, is transfixed on Elvis’ show-stopping dance moves on the Ed Sullivan Show. Later on, however, God loses taste in Elvis once He watches one of his movies. Man, those movies are pretty fucking awful — have you actually managed to watch one without walking away? A new group from Liverpool emerges as the Next Big Thing and yup, God takes a liking to them, too.

Of course, God digs the Beatles. Everyone likes the Beatles. However, it’s the Beach Boys that God favours slightly more. With their catchy pop harmonies and brilliantly structured melodies, it’s no wonder that God appreciated the Beach Boys just a bit better than the Beatles. God was probably wondering what the heck the Beatles were doing in India on their “mystical retreats” anyways. But time moves on to a more rockfocused period in music, one filled with experimentation and psychedelia. So, it should be no surprise that God immediately takes a liking to Genesis. OK, that’s kinda cheesy, I’ll admit. But let’s assume that He enjoys the Nursery Rhymeera much better than the dreadful The Way We Walk shit. God also appreciated the Black Sabbath, not in a lyrical sense, oh, are you kidding? But more in a, “Hey St. Peter, check out this fucking record out, man”- way. Since no good music came out of the ‘80s, God took note of this, checked his calendar, realized it was Sunday, and slept right through the decade. When he woke up, the first thing he heard was a few chords from this Seattle band named Nirvana. “How fitting,” God thought, but it was too late. He was hooked. Today, God doesn’t have too much time for music. He does own an iPod and yes, God does pirate music from the internet, rationalizing that if all those college kids are doing it, why can’t He? But unfortunately there’s too many real things going on in the world today, like that new pope he’s got to train and fixing that Iraq mess (you didn’t think the States was ever going to solve that one, did you?). But even now, God turns on his stereo player, puts in a mixtape that was given to him by His son (a love of music is the few things they actually have in common), stretches out on his custom futon and enjoys the tunes as he relaxes on a cigar rolled by cherubs. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking — it was a pretty fucked up dream. dgeorgec@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

performances take place outdoors at Point Pleasant Park in the historic Martello Tower. Greg leaves for Halifax in midJune to begin the demanding threeweek rehearsal period. The performance season kicks off on July 1 with a special Canada Day presentation of Twelfth Night and runs until August 28 with different productions running on different days six days per week. Although Carere is thrilled about performing all summer and being in the beautiful city of Halifax (he anticipates eating rampant amounts of seafood), he’s also nervous about working with the talented company and seasoned directors. It’s a dream come true to act and actually get paid for it, but while Carere will be living the dream, he will also be living the reality. His accommodations are not provided by the company, so in order to save money Carere will spend the summer “sleeping on

the floor of a room in student housing.” However, it seems like Carere will be so busy with Shakespeare by the Sea, he’ll do little more than sleep there. The company, made up of 14 actors, is involved in all aspects of the production season from set construction and destruction to teaching mini university in the month of August to aspiring young thespians. The extra duties should be no sweat for Carere, who was involved in the rigorous technical theatre class this year as well as participating in almost every production as an actor. Carere is one of only two new actors to the Shakespeare by the Sea company, the rest are returnees from previous seasons including Nathan Bender, another UW Drama graduate. People who have seen him perform might be surprised to learn that Greg was not initially a drama major. Carere intended to major in psychology when he began his studies at UW

in the fall of 2003, but quickly revised his plan when he was cast as Oliver in the department’s production of Shakespeare’s As You Like It. Greg has a lot of praise for the drama department here at UW, remarking that “It’s a department full of people having fun, doing it in a professional way and making art that’s a blast to watch.” After his contract ends on August 28th, Greg will return to his third year studies here at UW. Carere was very active in the UW Drama Department this season, playing the role of Prospero last fall in The Tempest, writing and directing his own play, Starfall, in the Upstart Festival and then playing the role of the Herald in Marat/Sade last March. For more information about Shakespeare by the Sea visit the website, www.shakespearebythesea.ca., which includes bios for both UW students Greg Carere and Nathan Bender. akind@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Free Comic Book Day — Beckett Comics sampler Margaret Mansell IMPRINT STAFF

If you happened to wander by one of Waterloo’s many comic stores on May 7, you might have noticed quite a commotion going on inside. Free Comic Book Day (this year marks the fourth anniversary) is an event across North America where stores will give away a selection of 30 books to anyone who wanders in. It is a chance for stores to promote the medium of comics as a whole as well as particular companies and artists who wouldn’t normally get a chance at such wide distribution. I happened to pick up a sampler issue from Beckett Comics, a small company based in Dallas, Texas. They have been around since 1984 but are just starting to make waves in the marketplace. Their sampler included excerpts from their top three titles at the moment. The first two samples entitled Ronin Hood of the 47 Samurai and The Ballad of

COURTESY OF BECKETT COMICS

Sleeping Beauty respectively left much to be desired. It is the third sample that is by far the most promising of the three. Fade From Grace is a superhero title with a twist. A calming and contemplative voice-over from the main hero balances

the action in the panels. The main character, Fade, has the ability to become incorporeal and cause other objects to do so as well — not a particularly original superpower but Fade reflects on many of his fears from fighting the bad guys despite his external heroic persona. Fade From Grace stylistically resembles the movie Waking Life, and with the film’s widespread success, I would have to agree with Beckett Comics when they describe it as perfect for the, “non-comic book reading,” type. Usually readers have to watch how they spend their money given how many titles there are to pick from. Free Comic Book Day is a chance to see what’s upand-coming and maybe try a title that you wouldn’t normally get to see otherwise. Although Free Comic Book Day has passed, there’s still a chance your local store has extras left over. After all, free entertainment is a rarity. mmansell@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Winter finale — Orchestra plays Symphony #1 Jan Narveson SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

Orchestra@UWaterloo assembled March 31 and was greeted by a smaller crowd than last December, though it was a respectable and enthusiastic crowd — and with reason. Over the winter, some personnel changes and a lot more hard work saw the orchestra through very demanding programs from Rossini’s Overture and “La Gazza Ladra” (The Thieving Magpie) to Samuel Barber’s First Essay for Orchestra and Four Dance Episodes from Aaron Copland’s classic American ballet, Rodeo. The evening’s big piece, Jean Sibelius’s Symphony No. 1, is a notorious “killer” work, with complex harmonies and huge crescendi and climaxes that, again, you just don’t expect non-professional orchestras to be able to manage. But, wrong again! I would have to rate this

performance a real triumph, with every movement coming off well. Its scherzo, for example, is a downright cruel test of orchestral cohesiveness, but it all actually worked, and worked well in this account. And its great finale brought out the big sound and reliability of intonation that you need to make it work. You could hear the sombreness of the vast Finnish forests, the determination and endurance of her people, and the ingenuity of its com-

poser in striking degree here. It was a triumph not only for the orchestra, but perhaps especially for its hardworking and talented conductor, Erna Van Daele. She showed us that it can be done. Lovers of classical orchestral music can be grateful that the students, staff and alumni of UW and their very capable conductor have been able to focus their energies on this project. Look forward to their next concert, folks.

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IMPRINT ARTS

12

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

Join the club — Swingers at UW! Amanda Kind IMPRINT STAFF

Before the term swinger came to refer to a new age sexual revolution, it defined a generation of youth who developed a dance craze during World War II. The jazz age and swing dance eventually gave way to rock and roll in the1950s, helped significantly by the enormous popularity of Elvis. But, just as fashion trends eventually re-emerge, swing

dance also made a comeback in the late ‘90s. The Swing Revolution saw renewed interest in all aspects of the era; ‘40s fashion was plastered all over magazine covers, bands like Brian Setzer Orchestra and Big Bad Voodoo Daddy released chart-topping hits in a modern big band style and the movie Swing Kids became a cultural phenomenon. In recent years, swing has moved out of the national spotlight, but interest in the dance styles prompted by the revolution is still thriving.

KIRILL LEVIN

Two male instructors for the Swing and Social Dance Club teach the first lesson of the spring season in the SLC Wednesday night.

Across North America, swing lessons are offered at many recreation centres, dance schools and at universities, including UW. The Swing and Social Dance Club was formed in 1998 and boasted over 500 members in its first semester. Since then it has grown to forge relationships with local swing clubs offering weekly lessons and dances for members and non-members year-round. So what if you have never swing danced in your life? The club promises there is no partner, experience or co-ordination required. President Ryan Marthinson explains that the club is as much about the social aspect of swing dance as it is about the dance itself. I’m sure a little rhythm helps too. Members can take lessons at a variety of levels at little or no cost or just hang out and jive to big band music. Membership is available by semester and is not limited to UW students. The cost is $15 for students and $20 for nonstudents. A membership also comes with some bonus features: a flashy membership card, free dance lessons at Swing Club meetings, discounts on dances in the Waterloo area, free or cheap admission to other Swing Club events such as barbecues or bonfires, free book and video rentals from the Swing Club library, the ability to vote for each term’s executive committee and the chance to be on exec for a term. The Swing and Social Dance Club has a variety of optional events outside their weekly meeting. Lessons are held Monday nights from 8 p.m. to 9 p.m. followed by three hours of dancing at The Vault Lounge. On Saturdays, at

The Lancaster House Tavern from 4 p.m.to7 p.m., club members can dance to various live jazz bands and on Sunday at the Rockway Country Club from 6 p.m. to 1 a.m. the club joins forces with The Dancers Only Club of Kitchener to dance the night away. There are several different dance styles housed within the Swing genre. The Swing and Social Dance Club covers dances like Lindy Hop, East Coast Swing, Charleston, Balboa, Blues, and Salsa. In addition to the weekly local events, the swing club is also connected to the swing community at large. On June 10-11, Devona Cartier from New York City will teach a workshop at the Royal Canadian Legion on Regina Street in Waterloo. The workshop, presented by Addicted to Dancing, runs from 9:30 a.m. until 5 p.m. on Saturday, June 11 and features a variety of styles. Dancers can then show off their moves at the Saturday night dance from 7:45 p. m. to 1 a.m. to the superlative musical stylings of The Douglas Watson R&B Blues Band. The first lesson of the spring term happened last Wednesday night, May 18, but membership is still available at weekly meetings. The meeting time is still to be determined. Check out their website, http:// watserv1.uwaterloo.ca/~dance/home.cgi, for information as it becomes available. Summer is a great time to try new things and meet new people, so give in to that secret urge to kick up your heels, find that buried copy of Brian Setzer Orchestra and jump, jive and wail. akind@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Books that will change your life thurs.- sat. 9pm-2am 667 king st w kitchener 571-9032

all request thursdays with dj obi no cover / free pool

big al’s retro fridays

new rock alternative saturdays no cover for the ladies

PATIO NOW OPEN

Have you ever read a book, and while you were reading it you just knew you would never be the same? Each of these books will challenge how you see yourself, or how you look at the world. These are books I read over and over again, and that I give away time and again. I would say these are books you could give to anyone, friend and family alike. These books will help you examine your view of the world and your role in it.

Todd Duncan Life By Design

Paulo Coelho The Alchemist

John C. Maxwell The Journey from Success to Significance

Harper Perennial

J. Countryman

This is an amazing book. It is a story of a young man who has a dream of hidden treasure. It is a book that alludes to the fact that all of us have a purpose and a dream. Yet many settle, give up their dream and lose their passion for life. In this book it is stated again and again that each of us has our own Personal Legend; a quest, “When you pursue your personal legend the universe will conspire with you to make it happen.” You will follow Santiago on his adventure and during the process be challenged to think about your goals and dreams and what you would have to do to pursue them.

An interesting little book that will help you learn to focus on others. Like The Choice is Yours, this book is full of quotes and tidbits to help your life have more meaning and purpose. If you read it you will be challenged, and if you’re willing to work, you will experience growth in character and attitudes.

J. Countryman

This is a great book. It will help you determine what you value and provide you with tools to pursue those values. It will teach you to establish what your values are and to clarify them. If you use the tools found here you will be growing with the intention to be moving forward to become who you want to be.

Each of these books sits on a shelf of my all-time favourites. I hope you will pick one up. They’re worth the time and effort. — Steven R McEvoy Second Year Religious Studies


Six

Two million thumbs

can’t be

34841rrim_4.indd 1

wrong.

5/16/2005 12:13:05 PM


OPINION 14

IMPRINT OPINION

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

Age limit for marriage

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005 Imprint is published by Imprint Publications Student Life Centre 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, ON N2L 3G1

TALES FROM THE SEX SHOP

Laura Katsirdakis and Mark Stratford

Society says 22 is too young to tie the knot

There are a lot of things in life you have to wait for. You have to wait until you’re 16 to drive a car, 18 to vote and 19 to drink legally. Now in my early 20s, I thought these age restrictions were a thing of the past (except for insurance breaks at 25 and of course the seniors discount), but I was wrong. It seems these days wearing a diamond engagement ring on your finger at 22 years old is taboo despite the legal age of 18. Marriage is for 30-year-olds now. For years it was socially acceptable —even traditional — to get married after high school. But over the last three decades a profound social change in Canada has occurred in terms of family formation and dissolution. Statistics Canada shows the average age at first marriage increased to 28 years old in 1991 from 25 in 1971 for men. For women, the age increased to 26 years old from 22. While convention follows this trend, it does not mean 20-somethings cannot have successful marriages, nor should they be barred from enjoying the happiness engagement brings. For more than a year now, since my sweetheart popped the question, I have listened to dozens of phony congrats before the hackneyed lecture about being too young to marry. Some people didn’t even take the time to pretend to be happy for my fiancé and I. They simply gawked at the ring for a moment before shrieking in disgust at how two bright young people could make such a horrible decision. “It won’t last, you are too young,” they repeated. I know the divorce rates. I know my marriage has a 50/50 chance – but so do people marrying in their 30s, 40s

and even 50s. Anytime two people are joined in marriage they are taking a chance, regardless of their age. It is a risk, but so is going on an airplane or eating calamari at a new restaurant. If you don’t take risks, you won’t experience life to its fullest. Maybe that is the problem with society today. We focus too much on failure and not enough on what’s really important — those who have succeeded. My fiancé’s parents are a great example. Married at 18 years old and still happily married 30 years later. Some people by the age of 20, myself included, are more mature than those at 50-years-old. Therefore, one must assess each couple individually before refuting a young marriage. And contrary to belief, marrying at a young age doesn’t mean you are missing out on everything. It is a matter of priorities. If getting married means not going to college or pursuing a goal, then wait. If the thought of never sleeping with another man or woman makes you sweat, then wait. I’ve been to college, bought a house, started my career and yes settled down with the man I love. But, I still go to the bars, I still have pajama parties and drink irresponsibly (sometimes), I still call my mom when I am sick and I still have plans to travel. Dr. Phil, whom I admire, advises against marrying in your 20s because it is still a period of constant change. But we are always changing. When I am 50, I will not be the same person I was at 30. Not only will my hair be gray and my breasts less perky, but life experiences will have also changed my entire demeanor. My philosophy is that at any age you decide to marry, you must learn to grow with your partner. But if those pessimistic people happen to be right about things not working out, my fiancé and I will have one thing going for us –— our youth and the time to do it all over again. editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

IMPRINT U N I V E R SIT Y

OF

W AT E R L O O S T U D E N T N E W S PA P E R

Editorial Staff Editor-in-chief, Carla Sandham editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Assistant Editor, Darren Hutz Cover Editor, Salim Eteer News Editor, Ciprian Mihalcea News Assistant, Jackie McKoy Opinion Editor, Mark Johnson Features Editor, vacant Arts Editor, Amanda Kind Science Editor, Azadeh Samadi Sports Editor, vacant Photo Editor, Kirill Levin Graphics Editor, Claire Mousseau Web Editor, Michael Scanlon Systems Administrator, vacant Sys. Admin. Assistant, vacant Lead Proofreader, Paul Marchwica Proofreader, Simon Yarrow Proofreader, Ernie Lau Proofreader, Alex Tam

Friday, May 20, 2005

Mistakes do more than offend Imprint suffers its share of misinformation claims

As work terms grind to an end, my colleagues who are in the engineering co-op stream will inevitably grouse about the length and technical accuracy required for their work reports. By comparison, co-op work reports for arts students are significantly shorter and do not require a technical review for a passing grade. I would attempt to mollify these students by pointing out that if I were to make a mistake, someone would be offended. In contrast, if an engineer were to make a mistake, someone might die.

— Vol. 28, No. 2

Student Life Centre 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, ON N2L 3G1

Proofreader, Mallory Peternel Office Staff General manager, Catherine Bolger cathy.bolger@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Advertising & production manager, Laurie Tigert-Dumas ads@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Distribution, Sarah Burley Distribution, Maureen Peterson Board of Directors board@imprint.uwaterloo.ca President, Dan Micak Vice-president, Sarah Allmendinger Treasurer, Jeff Anstett Secretary, Kelley Dilkes Staff liaison, Durshan Ganthan staff.liaison@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

F: 519.884.7800 P: 519.888.4048 imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Production Staff Scott Houston, Margie Mansell, Christine Loureiro, Will Young, Dean Whelton, Chris Miller, Steven Snowdon, Tom Levesque, Dan Micak, Janine Gilbert, Alizia, Michael L. Davenport.

Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Editorial submissions may be considered for publication in any edition of Imprint. Imprint may also reproduce the material commercially in any format or medium as part of the newspaper database, website or any other product derived from the news-

All of that changed for me this week as I heard reports of the protests that raged in parts of the Islamic world over allegations that interrogators in the US Guantanamo Bay detention facility desecrated the Islamic holy book. At least 17 people have been killed and numerous government or aid agency buildings have been attacked in retaliation for the desecration. In response, the U.S. government quickly trotted out the usual suspects to denounce the allegations and the Pentagon denied that they had found any evidence of the alleged incident. Then, last week’s Newsweek, the publication that ran the initial report, rushed out a retraction, a letter from the editor, and a report of tracing where the error had occurred. Interestingly, charges of desecration of the Qur’an at the hands of interro-

gators have surfaced in the past, but protests have not reached the emotional level that they did in this past week. I cannot claim an encyclopedic knowledge on this particular angle, but I understand that those with an ear to the ground suspect that the crowds were part of a greater political struggle. The latest allegations were merely a prop. Naturally, the Pentagon has denied that anything of the sort has ever happened to the Qur’an. However, the burden of proof lies with them. With hundreds of prisoners incarcerated and interrogated and with scant information on their treatment, the public is left to imagine what might be going on inside. Of course, the AbuGharib photographs didn’t help much either.

paper. Those submitting editorial content, including articles, letters, photos and graphics, will grant Imprint first publication rights of their submitted material, and as such, agree not to submit the same work to any other publication or group until such time as the material has been distributed in an issue of Imprint, or Imprint declares their intent not to publish the material. The full text of this agreement is available upon request.

advertisement. One copy per customer. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Imprint CDN Pub Mail Product Sales Agreement no. 40065122.

Imprint does not guarantee to publish articles, photographs, letters or advertising. Material may not be published, at the discretion of Imprint, if that material is deemed to be libelous or in contravention with Imprint’s policies with respect to our code of ethics and journalistic standards. Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit and refuse advertising. Imprint Publications is not responsible for advertisng mistakes beyond the cost of the

See NEWS, page 15

Next staff meeting: Tuesday, May 24 12:30 p.m., SLC 1116 Next production night: Tuesday, May 31 and Wednesday, June 1, 2005 5 p.m., SLC 1116 Next board meeting: May 25, 2005 5:15 p.m.


FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

IMPRINT OPINION

15

Beavers accurately represent Canada For all that is great about our country and there certainly is a lot to be proud of, Canadians have never quite been able to garner respect from the rest of the world as being a true powerhouse on the international stage. Our economy has been the fastest growing of the G7 nations since World War II besides Japan. Until recently, we had contributed to every United Nations peacekeeping mission since the organization’s inception, and we have been ranked as one of the best places to live in the world with our strong belief in human rights and universal health care. Yet, there still seems to be a stigma, even amongst ourselves, that we aren’t a first class nation — but why? Sure our military, amateur athletes, technological and medical researchers are underfunded, thus limiting our

potential to contribute to the international community, but I believe the cause goes deeper than that. Something more fundamental reaches straight to the root of what makes us proud to be Canadian. Something like‌ our national animal. Yes, that’s right — the beaver. What do you picture when you think of a beaver, besides the obvious innuendo (I know that’s what you all are thinking — don’t pretend you’re not!)? I see a furry little creature that swims around all day and is mostly harmless unless you happen to be a tree. Does it not make you feel completely inadequate that out of all the fauna on the surface of the earth, this is the being we choose to compare ourselves with? Contrasted against the eagle of the United States as graceful as it is proud, the beaver simply doesn’t compare. Or does it? Lets take a look at some of the alternatives: The bear: seemingly a great choice. Four main creeds of bear inhabit this fine land in a peaceful, tolerant manner. Bears also hibernate during the winter, as most of us wish to do and

they awake in spring as gluttons ingesting anything they can get their hands on — not unlike many offensive linemen in the CFL. Bears can also be ferocious when provoked, and they do not rely on their friendly neighbours to the south for protection against their enemies. This trait clearly eliminates them as an option. The moose: a giant animal. The moose symbolizes the northern wilderness of the Canadian Shield, one of Canada’s most dominant geographical features on this side of the Rocky Mountains. However, the average moose call has better pitch and tone than most Canadian songwriters at the moment (See: Alanis Morrisette. See also: Nelly Furtado). This too discounts them as a possible replacement. The couch potato: Most commonly observed watching “the game,� couch potatoes can be found in living rooms right across the country feasting on anything from chips to pizza, typically accompanied with beer. Recently, however, this quickly disappearing carnivorous mammal

was added to the endangered species list shortly after the NHL lockout. Although it is probably the ideal candidate for this purpose, its likeliness to the sloth makes it an image we would hardly want to put forth as a national identity. Clearly, the beaver is not such a bad choice. After all, it certainly has traits that characterize the Canadian people: hard working, nature loving and easily turned into a hat. Ok, so maybe that point isn’t as valid, but you get the idea. Furthermore, the beaver is hardly an animal that should be taken lightly, especially if you’re an eagle. For every nest there must be a tree, a metaphorical lesson lost on America and their mainly urban, nature-less population. All we need to do is nibble at the trunk from time to time as a friendly reminder of who’s the boss – do this, and Canadian pride will flow like Niagara Falls. After giving the world insulin, the Canadarm, and Shania Twain, we deserve at least that.

News: facts continued from page 14

Newsweek magazine, with one case of poor fact-checking, tainted its news disseminating credibility. What a difference one extra phone call might have made. Three elements—back-room politicking, a poor reputation, and not enough background research — combined to create an international incident. William Randolph Hearst would be proud. Here on campus, Imprint suffers its share of misinformation claims. Unfortunately, many of the complaints are well-founded. As a student newspaper, staffed by volunteers, we cannot hope to catch everything. The campus is also home to well over 20, 000 differing opinions. Here, the old adage about one man’s freedom fighter comes to mind. We are a student newspaper. We’re not perfect. We’d like to improve. Thankfully, our more recent mistakes have only resulted in a few more refunds or letters to the editor.

kruch@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

MOVING PICTURES

neal@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Claire Mousseau

Fostering understanding is key

Apart from the celebration of life of an admired religious leader, last month’s extensive coverage of the funeral of Pope John Paul II served, perhaps unwittingly, another interesting function: the exposure of the world at large to the ritual and ceremony associated with a religious worldview. To many outside a faith community, much of the detailed protocol is inexplicable — outdated convention at best, baseless superstition at worst. Yet to believers the world over, seemingly insignificant considerations can hold enormous value, connecting them to a common tradition, each other and their most deep and profound beliefs.

It is with this background that one might try to understand the outrage of the UW Muslim community after the publication of two articles in last term’s Misprint, one parodying a well-known Muslim figure and the other misrepresenting an identifiable Islamic institution (Jihad). While there is ample room for appropriate humour in the Muslim community, Muslims the world over hold as sacrosanct both the dignity of all other humans, as well as divine laws prohibiting sexual impropriety and terrorism. These last two are severe sins within an Islamic worldview, and accusing others of having committed them — even in jest — is considered unacceptable. For Muslims, upstanding ethical conduct is considered intimately linked to one’s belief system, giving it an added sense of gravity. This editorial is largely an attempt to foster understanding for

Muslim beliefs and traditions among the campus population. With such issues, it is easy to put forth arguments on both sides intended to silence the other party, either by invoking a right to free speech, or by reading discriminatory motives into the contentious articles. These approaches have enormous emotional appeal, but they are not constructive. And they obscure our common responsibility to engage in a genuine dialogue aimed at constructing a compassionate society in which we can live together and understand — not simply tolerate — one another. It is the firm belief of the MSA that the only way forward in our multicultural society is to increase constructive dialogue between all segments of the population, and to actively work towards sincerely understanding each other’s values and ideas. —Muslim Student Association

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IMPRINT OPINION Sex obsessed polititicans and dirty laundry To the class of 2005 WPIRG Letters Letters 16

In North America, it seems sex and politics go hand-in-hand. It’s hard to go a week without hearing about some sort of politically-active individual become embroiled in a sex scandal — thanks to the heartlessness of news reporters everywhere— it’s all too easy to get the juicy, cigar-related details. The sexuality of politicians is also an occasional source of sensation. Nowadays, a Canadian politician’s “coming out” is lucky to make front page news in their own riding, much less nationally. Of course, it’s an entirely different matter south of what was once the longest unguarded border in the world. Now, it seems, every time a politician is revealed to be gay, it makes rather large waves in the news. The most recent would be Jim West, the Mayor of Spokane, who is currently being investigated by local police for allegedly abusing his power to try and entice younger men to have sex with him. Thanks to the power of the Internet chat room and AOL, he could offer internships to 18 year olds in the hopes of “starting something up” all

under the power of anonymity... until the alleged “18-yearold” turned out to be an expert hired by local newspaper The Spokesman-Review. Oops! The main reason why some people are so shocked and angry about this revelation is that West is not only a Republican, but also one of the staunchest opponents to gay marriage and basic civil protection for GLBT citizens within his political circles. He voted to bar the distribution of pamphlets in 1986 that advised people how to avoid catching AIDS, while in the same year advocating for screening employees and firing those whose homosexuality became known. He’s suggested teen sex be criminalized, while at the same time saying, “Two consenting adults must have the ability to protect their privacy or else the damn sex Nazis will be telling everyone what to do.” Strangely, he didn’t catch on when one of his (then 18-year-old) flings pointed out his hypocrisy. And West is only the most recent of a long string of Republican politicians and political supporters whose rhetoric do not match their own actions. Take for example Chairman of the Republican National Committee, Ken Mehlman, who repeatedly avoids answering questions about his sexuality. This isn’t even a new trend, it goes back to Terry Dolan, a closeted gay man who was the head of the National

Conservative Political Action Committee. He put out fundraising letters including the quote, “Our nation’s moral fibre is being weakened by the growing homosexual movement and the fanatical E.R.A. pushers (many of whom publicly brag they are lesbians).” It truly boggles the mind: how can these people spend their days extolling their hatred of “those queers,” and then spend their nights trolling Internet chat rooms in the hopes of finding a nice young guy to help warm up their sheets? These acts extend well beyond the realm of self-loathing and hypocrisy, landing squarely into severe identity and psychological issues, not to mention what must be a truly twisted sense of self. And this keeps happening. Is it the result of years of suppressing your own identity until Freud’s theories about repression and redirection become self-fulfilling? I don’t know. At the same time, this could potentially be used to explain much of what is happening in the “Conservative” political arena today. Are these Republican members so heavily focused on other people’s sex lives because they are absolutely stark terrified of people focusing on their own? It has to make you wonder. We’re learning about West’s dirty laundry, but just what are all the other sex-obsessed politicians hiding? gbarclay@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

The following excerpts are derived from the convocation address of Vanderbilt University Chancellor Gordon Gee, addressing the Nashville, Tennessee-based school’s 2005 graduates last weekend. While his words were directed towards a primarily American audience, it was amazing how timely they are for the country to his north, one currently caught up in an unstable political environment. “Our culture is currently caught up in the notion that if people are convinced of their own correctness, their ugliest behaviour and feelings will be justified. So long after the last election, I still see so many bumper stickers, both for the victorious party and for the parties that are currently out of power. Although most of the stickers speak to convictions that are important, none of them seem to me to give any joy, because ‘In your face!’ is not joy. The stickers I see speak out of a sense of pride and a cocky supposition that perhaps they will be a bother to someone else. There is no chance of dialogue in them, only brand identification. The future of this nation, and of the world, is too important and delicate to be encompassed by stickers and branding, or by a notion of being

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

on teams, and whose team prevails. “Consider, for a moment, that it may be possible for two people who have conflicting viewpoints both to be right. Because one of the things that enthralls me and keeps me in university is the fact that I get to have so many different kinds of friends. I have friends who are outrageously radical conservatives, and I have some far-left pinko friends. I have friends who disagree with me on almost every issue, but I am so happy that I get to hear their ideas because, over time, their views polish and temper and refine my own. That would not be possible if I, or if they, thought like a bumper sticker. “What you have inherited by the stroke of fate which would have you at university at exactly that moment in time, at this chaotic and discordant phase in our history, is that now you are the ones whom it falls upon to reknit our shared culture. It becomes your task to set things right, to find a new axis for balance. And the way which you find to do that will be the way you show the merit of your diploma.” “I have so much faith in your capabilities and your good sense, but the zeitgeist is a forceful gale indeed. Do not let it erode the habits you have learned. Do not let yourself be a useful tool in someone else’s scheme for power and profit, for ratings or for influence. Please do not choose to capitalize on keeping this country out of joint. adilts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


SPretty CIENCE & TECHNOLOGY kids equals better care IMPRINT SCIENCE

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005 FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

17 science@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Alberta researchers find uglier children are neglected

Voice recognition makes driving simpler

Azadeh Samadi

Azadeh Samadi

IMPRINT STAFF

Recently, Canadian researchers investigated the relationship between parents and their children and concluded that parents take better care of pretty children than they do ugly ones. One might say, no matter how ugly the baby is, he is the best looking baby in the eyes of his parents. Also, ugly babies come from ugly parents. But this research was done on 400 child-parent interactions in 14 supermarkets and it is well proven. Researchers at the University of Alberta carefully observed parents’ behaviour toward their children during trips to the supermarket. They found that physical attractiveness made a big difference. The researchers noted if the parents buckled up their children into the grocery cart and how often they allowed them to stand up in the shopping cart. They rated each child’s physical attractiveness on a 10-point scale.The results revealed attractiveness plays a big role. When

a mother was in charge of fastening her child’s seatbelt, four per cent of the homeliest children were strapped in compared to 13.3 per cent of the attractive children. The difference was even more obvious when fathers led the shopping carts. In those cases, none of the ugly children were secured with seatbelts, but 12.5 per cent of the cutest

AZADEH SAMADI

were. Furthermore, a greater number of the least attractive children were

often out of sight of their parents’ and were allowed to wander more than 10 feet away. The research showed handsome boys were usually kept closer to their parents than girls. Researchers guessed that girls might be able to act more independently than boys of the same age. The leader of the research team, Dr. W. Andrew Harrell, executive director of the Population Research Laboratory at the University of Alberta, observes an evolutionary reason for this research. He said “pretty children represent the best genetic legacy and therefore they get more care.” Dr. Robert Sternberg, professor of psychology and education at Yale, said Dr. Harrell should have considered socioeconomic status in his research. Dr. Harrell said “like lots of animals, we tend to parcel out our resources on the basis of values; maybe we can’t always articulate that, but in fact we do it. There are lots of things that make a person more valuable, and physical attractiveness may be one of them.” asamadi@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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HELP WANTED Weekend counsellors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Minimum eightmonth commitment. Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, K-W Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, Kitchener, ON, N2G 3V2. Help wanted for Summer – What do you usually do when you have four hours of free time? Socialize, watch a movie, read a book, exercise, daydream, nigh clubbing or volunteer? We all have busy lives these days - we work, we go to school, we provide childcare, we socialize, etc., etc. Sometimes it seems that we just do not have the time to do anything else in our lives. But did you know that it only takes four hours a week to provide an important community service and potentially make a huge difference in someone’s life? The Distress Centre is operated by the Canadian Mental Health Association and provides supportive listening and crisis assessment and de-escalation for people living in the Waterloo

Region. Volunteers receive training in listening skills, crisis de-escalation and community resources. Volunteers work with a highly trained Crisis Intervention Team and receive on-going supervision and feedback. If this sounds like the volunteer job for you, please contact Joanne Martin at 744-7645, ext 300. Angies Kitchen Ltd, St. Agatha, needs wait persons with Sip program and line cooks. Weekends and weekday schedules available. Call 747-1700, ask for Sharon or Mike Graham. Sales Assistant required for 12 week position starting May 30, 2005 at $8.00 per hour plus mileage. Assisting the Advertising/Production Manager with client data base, marketing of publication through various means, design and layout of advertisements. Requirements: strong organization and people skills; able to work with minimal supervision, desktop publishing with Adobe software, MS software, driver license and vehicle. Candidate must be a student returning to school full time in the fall. Please send resume to Imprint Publications by mail: 200 University Ave., W., University of Waterloo, Student Life Centre, room 1116, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3G1 or fax: 519-884-7800 or e-mail: ads@imprint.uwaterloo.ca. Sales help needed. Hours negotiable but weekend work is necessary. Selling antiques and books in store and online. Must have own transportation. Please call Ron at 664-1195. Editorial Assistant needed for 9 weeks starting July 5 at $10.00 per hour. The job entails assisting the Editor-in-chief in all stages of pre-press production of Imprint’s frosh issue including planning, coordinating, editing, designing and layout. Experience using Adobe software. The candidate should be creative and detail oriented with strong communication, written and oral skills. Sample of

work should accompany resume. The candidate must be a student returning to school full time in the fall. Please send resume/samples to Imprint Publications by mail: 200 University Ave., W., University of Waterloo, Student Life Centre, room 1116, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3G1 or fax: 519-884-7800 or e-mail: editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca. Part-time help needed at Just N’ Pita, 150 University Ave. W, Waterloo. Please bring in resume during business hours.

HOUSING Free Apartment Finder Services! Over 8,000 apartments in our database. We make appointments, you save time! High rise, low rise, town homes, furnished and unfurnished. All prices! Call now for this free service. 310-7000. Uptown Waterloo – Caroline and Erb Street room for rent. Please call 496-8273, ask for Teresa or Bob Huegle. September rental – three bedroom townhouse in student complex. Excellent unit with new carpets and vinyl being installed before move in. New appliances. Utilities included, $350 per bedroom. Call Darlene 746-1411. Immediate rental – three bedroom large multi level townhouse. Excellent student townhouse complex professionally managed. Utilities included for $350 per bedroom. It doesn’t get any better than this! Call Darlene at 746-1411, Haney PM. Five bedroom house for rent. Close to both universities. Two kitchens, two bathrooms, laundry, five car parking space, garage and central air. Available September 1. Please call 575-1973. Professional mother and five year old daughter from Victoria BC wish to house sit in Waterloo, June through August. Please e-mail pegan@islandnet.com, or call Pegan collect 250-385-2341.

IMPRINT STAFF

Do you have trouble asking other people for directions? Or is it hard for you to read a map while you are driving? Have you ever been so hungry that you just wished to know where the closest restaurant is? All you need to do is keep your eyes on the road and your hands on the wheel; of course, but also talk to the car. Using voice recognition and textto-speech technology from IBM, the 2005 Acura RL, available in October, and the Honda Odyssey, available in September, will produce maps and “speak” turn-by-turn directions including street names — such as “turn right on Second Street, then left on Weber Street” — from the navigation system. You can also make a phone call or even crank up the air conditioning. The only thing you need to do is to talk. According to IBM, the audio directions are produced using sounds that are merged into natural sound words. Also, the system is designed to work in the presence of ambient sounds, such as air conditioning or a racing engine.

Moreover, it recognizes different accents across North America and Canada. The vehicles recognize 700 voice commands and can reply to 1.7 million street and city names from across North America. Also, the GPS-enabled system in the car can search a database of nationwide dining information and provide drivers and their passengers the ability to find their favorite restaurant. Just say “take me to a Greek restaurant!” The 2005 Acura RL also includes a real-time traffic navigation system that highlights congested roads on the screen. The voice recognition and navigation systems will likely be limited to high-class vehicles for now since they can cost up to $2,000 to install. Although somewhat costly, using it is not very complicated, thanks to the technology that enables drivers to converse with their cars about where to go and how to get there. Who knows? Maybe someday you won’t even have to drive yourself — you will just tell your vehicle to go wherever you want to go!

asamadi@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

CAMPUS BULLETIN ANNOUNCE Wanna ... live purposefully - lead passionately - influence powerfully? Twenty20 welcomes you! Twice a month - bus pickup at UW, SLC at 6:45 p.m and WLU underpass at 7:00 p.m. For more info call 744-7447 or www.kcf.org or pauld@kcf.org. Philosophy in Action. Join a discussion that looks at how philosophy applies to everyday life. Saturdays and Wednesdays at 7:00 p.m. in downtown Kitchener - 742-4433 (leave message). Grand National Quilt Show 2005-Airborne from May 8 to June 26 at the Kitchener-Waterloo Art Gallery, 101 Queen Street, N., Kitchener. Call 5795860 for info.

UPCOMING Wednesday, May 25, 2005 Sexual Assault Awareness Month – lecture series – “Safety and Date Rape Drugs” from 12:00 to 1:00 p.m. at Catholic Family Counselling Centre, 400 Queen Street, S, Kitchener. For info call 571-0121. Thursday, May 26, 2005 Learning Disabilities Association of KW is hosting a workshop “Your Accessibility Took Kit” presented by Lisa Allen, President of Global Etext, who will also discuss the latest software and technology. For reservation/info call 743-9091. Saturday, May 28, 2005 2005 Parkinson’s Regional Conference will be held at the Best Western Lamplighter Inn, 591 Wellington Road, South, London, Ontario. For info call 652-9437 or 1-888-851-7376.

FINANCIAL AID May 2005 Now available – 2005/2006 on-line application. Visit the OSAP web site at http://osap.gov.on.ca/ Earn while you learn – visit our web site for information and applications for our Work Study Program. Spring positions are still available. Upcoming deadlines – May 31: Spring 2005 OSAP applications, OSAP Spring Reinstatement form deadline for co-op students. June 1: Millennium Excellence Award Program. June 11: OSAP appeals for Spring 2005 term. June 15: Spring 2005 Bursary application. Visit the website for an application. For further information about the above info or other scholarships, awards and bursaries available for spring 2005, visit the website at http:// www.adm.uwaterloo.ca/infoawards/


SPORTS 18

IMPRINT SPORTS

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

FRIDAY, MAY 6, 2005

sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

CARLA SANDHAM

Carla Munch was recently named head coach of UW’s women’s golf team. The sport attained official OUA status last week after being an exhibition sport.

Women golfers gain new coach and status Carla Sandham EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

As Ontario University Athletics (OUA) embarks on its inaugural season of women’s golf in 2005, the Waterloo Warriors announced Carla Munch as head coach of the Warrior Women’s Golf program. Women’s golf achieved official OUA status last week after having been in an exhibition status for the past two years. “As we were drawing close to the success of this, I wanted the women’s team to have their own coach,� said Judy McCrae, UW athletics director. Carla Munch is the first women’s golf head coach at UW, as the women’s team had previously shared the men’s coach since the women’s program started in 2002. “Strong female role models in sport leadership are imperative,� said McCrae, “and Carla will be very suc-

cessful with this, and the athletes will get a great experience.� Munch, a former UW student, is currently the assistant golf professional and special events co-ordinator at Cambridge Golf and Country Club. She has played in many amateur tournaments on the Ontario Ladies circuit and several CPGA events on the Bank of Montreal Ladies tour. At 17 years old, Munch got a job at a golf course where her dad played and soon took up the sport for herself. “I started kind of late,� said 30year-old Munch, adding that she played field hockey, not golf, during her years at UW. But with her 13 years of experience she has a lot to give to the women at Waterloo, McCrae added. Munch said her goals for this year include getting a full team to compete at all levels and promoting women’s golf in the OUA in general.

“Women’s golf is taking off from the number of women involved to the extended media coverage of women professionals,� said Munch while walking across the greens at Cambridge Gold Club. “We need to get the word out and get on board.� Prior to earning official OUA status, the women’s team was limited in its opportunity to participate in tournaments. Now with full status, a provincewide university women’s golf championship will be held. Munch said she is excited about women having their own championship, but also wants to enter as many tournaments as possible. First, Munch said she would con-

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editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Geraldine Heaney named head coach of women’s hockey team IMPRINT STAFF

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not yet been set. Although the season doesn’t officially start until the fall, one member participated in an invitational event on May 14. UW student Jamie Steedman finished third overall at the event at the Ladies Club of the Toronto Golf Club. “The weather was terrible as it rained all day, and she shot an 81,� said Munch. Munch is still an avid competitor herself, but said she is excited about coaching. She will continue working with the three returning golfers throughout the summer to get a step up on the season.

Second coaching change in four months Rod McLachlan

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centrate on getting a full team together for the fall season, as it is a requirement of a grant she hopes to receive. The Royal Canadian Golf Association (RCGA) is offering five grants to universities and colleges that have both a men’s and women’s team. “The money would be used to promote the program and allows the teams to participate in more tournaments,� added Munch. Five women are needed to make a team for the RCGA, and four for the OUA. Thus far, Munch knows of three returning golfers and a prospective UW student from British Columbia who has shown interest in the program. Tryouts will be held, but a date has

In some professional leagues like the NHL it’s not uncommon for teams to go through coaches as fast as they do hockey sticks. However, for the Waterloo Warriors women’s ice hockey team and the OUA in general, going through three coaches in less than six months is a bit of a rarity. Nevertheless, the Warriors continue to attract high-profile, professionally-

experienced coaching talent to lead their team. Hopefully, this is the last change. Last month, UW’s director of athletics and rec services, Judy McCrae, announced that the UW women’s hockey program would be welcoming Geraldine Heaney as the team’s head coach. As a result, the Warriors said goodbye to Mike Kadar, who will likely be returning to his old job with the Los Angeles Kings of the NHL as their strength and conditioning coach should that league’s lockout come to an end.

Kadar originally replaced former head coach Bill Antler, who resigned from his position with the team during the Christmas break due to personal reasons. In Kadar’s place, Waterloo will be welcoming a seven-time world champion in the form of Heaney, who previously was a top-notch defender with Team Canada and has won Olympic gold and silver. See HEANEY, page 19


FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005

IMPRINT SPORTS

Yes Virginia, there is still meaningful hockey in Canada Great action plus single-elimination games and two titan teams equals one great experience: the Memorial Cup

In my 21-plus years on the planet, I’ve been privy to witnessing some pretty rare events, both in sport and elsewhere in life. I’ve watched a Yankees-Red Sox game from high up in the foul territory bleachers in Yankee Stadium. I was both privileged and heartbroken to be greenside for Mike Weir’s epic battle with — and eventual loss to — Vijay Singh at last year’s Bell Canadian Open. And just three weeks ago in my very own bedroom, I got to witness the unbelievable sight of my daughter Andie’s entrance into the world — I even shared that experience with a random 911 operator. But on April 23, 2005, I saw something really rare. We’re talking Hope-diamond rare, blue-steak rare, winning-the-Super-7 rare. Outside of my daughter’s birth, this was probably the rarest happening I have ever beheld. I saw the London Knights lose.

Outside of my daughter’s birth, this was probably the rarest happening I have ever beheld. I saw the London Knights lose. It only happened seven times during the Knights’ 68-game regular-season schedule. And with only two more losses in 18 playoff games, a Knights defeat was hard to come by in 200405. But on April 23, in a packed-to-the-nuts Kitchener Auditorium, the mighty Knights fell to the Kitchener Rangers, 3-1. Of course, the Knights rattled off three straight victories versus the Rangers to take the best-of-seven playoff series in five games. And

in the next round, the Knights steamrolled the Ottawa 67’s in five games to claim their first ever OHL title. It has been a dream season for the Knights, with only one final-fourteam, one-week hurdle to clear — and it happens to be in the Knights’ own backyard. The Memorial Cup begins this Saturday at the John Labatt Centre in London, eight days before the tournament will crown the 2005 Canadian Hockey League champions. And, at a time when the hockey world should be focused on the NHL conference finals, the Memorial Cup is just what the puck-starved doctor ordered to make fans fast forget the words “salary cap” — at least until the CHL champ is decided next weekend. Don’t be surprised if it’s the Knights, who set CHL records for wins and points this season before claiming the OHL title during their 162 postseason. But showing up and acting as gracious hosts is not enough for the Knights or their rabid allegiance of fans, both of whom will be crushed by anything short of a Memorial Cup title. But this Mem Cup is no walkover and hockey’s next big thing is in London to prove it. Seventeen-year-old phenom Sidney Crosby takes his peachfuzz playoff beard and his Rimouski Oceanic to London as the Quebec League champions. The Oceanic put together an undeniable streak of greatness in the second half, with only a single loss since New Year’s Day. The other two clubs at the tourney are no slouches either. The Kelowna Rockets enter the Mem Cup as both Western League champions and defending Memorial Cup champs. And the Ottawa 67’s gained entrance into the tourney as OHL runners-up (London qualified as both host and OHL champions). But they’re one of the most storied clubs in junior hockey history, capable of beating any team on any given day. And maybe that’s what makes the Memorial Cup so special. After the tourney’s round-robin preliminary round, the play-downs are onegame, single-elimination affairs. It’s 20 kids a side for 60 minutes of hockey, all bets in. But no matter who emerges as champion, the Memorial Cup will offer puck fans one more week of great hockey in 2005 before resorting to a summer of Blue Jays baseball. And in a season like this one, great hockey is a rare sighting. amcguire@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

New era for UW track and field The Department of Athletics recently announced Jason Dockendorff as new head coach of the Warrior Track and Field program. Jason succeeds former Hall of Fame and world renowned sprint and hurdle coach Brent McFarlane, who has retired from coaching. “We are indebted to Brent’s contribution for the past 16 years to the Track and Field program here at Waterloo”, said Athletic Director Judy McCrae. McCrae added, “We are looking forward to Jason taking over as head coach. His background both in the sport and team administration will

provide the framework for a successful program. Jason places a high value on hard work and will be a great fit for our student athletes." Dockendorff has been involved with UW Track and Field for the past eight seasons under the tutelage of coach McFarlane. Dockendorff, a Warrior alumnus, competed for the varsity track team for five years (1997-2002), serving as team captain from 2000-2002. “I am thrilled and feel extremely privileged to have this opportunity,” said Dockendorff. —Chris Gilbert, UW Athletics

19

Heaney: Athletics ropes in a star coach Continued from page 18

After Antler coached the 2004-2005 Warriors to a 3-7-1 record in the first half of the season before stepping down, Kadar came in and remarkably led the Warriors to the postseason for the first time in their history with a 5-4-2 record to close out the regular season. In the opening round of the playoffs, the Warriors were unable to solve Brock’s superb goaltending, losing the sudden-death quarterfinal playoff by a score of 4-1. After retiring in 2002 following a historic career, Heaney’s challenge will now be to provide some stability to a team that has undergone near-constant change behind the bench in the past few months. If the 37-year-old’s resumé is any indication of her coaching ability — Heaney is the Canadian national team’s leader in career games played (125) and points by a blue liner (93) — then the Warriors can rest assured that they are in good hands. Since calling it quits, the Irish-born superstar has been involved with her own hockey school in southwestern Ontario, the Toronto Aeros of the NWHL as a coach and evaluator as well as with the Ultra Skills Hockey Schools. Feeling that Heaney’s playing and coaching experience more than merited her appointment as head coach, McCrae’s job of finding a new coach was made a bit easier. “We are very excited about the hiring of Geraldine,” commented McCrae in an athletics department press release at the time of the announcement.

“She brings to us the strengths that the women’s hockey program is in need of. Geraldine’s playing career was outstanding. We are confident that Geraldine will bring her high expectations to the University of Waterloo.” COURTESY A c o n f i d e n t WWW.ATHLETICS.UWATERLOO.CA Heaney showed why Geraldine Heaney McCrae rightfully has so much faith in her through her comments, stating, “Having recently retired from a hockey-playing career that earned me many honours with the Women’s National Team, I embrace the opportunity for beginning my second career as the head coach of the Waterloo Warriors hockey program.” With several former-Aeros products playing CIS hockey, including McGill goaltending sensation Megan Takeda, Heaney should adapt to the Canadian varsity coaching ranks with ease. Either way, Heaney will face some fierce competition behind the bench as Windsor also recently named a new head coach, Todd Lalonde, to lead their women’s team. —with files from UW athletics rmclachlan@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


20

IMPRINT SPORTS

FRIDAY, MAY 20, 2005


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