Page 1


JANUARY 21, 2005

VOL 27, NO 23


How to Set Yourself On Fire and get away with it Montreal-based Stars to set Waterloo alight Dave George..cosh

the wrong message to people. We're not breaking .any new ground but we'redoingitin a way that people are You may not realize it, but our be- afraid of really doing." The message Stars gives isn't alloved Canadian music scene has quietl:y achieved somemuch-deserved no- ways that clear upon initial heatings. toriety within media circles. And no Masked over their unique and meother group of bands has led the lodic songs lie darker points that the charge with more success than the Arts band tries to present to the listener. & Crafts stable, consisting of the Bro- One of the standout tracks on Set ken Social Scene, Feist and most im- Yoursc!! 011 Fire, "He lied About portantly, Stars. Death," is a rant on the political cliStars have actively been changing mate in the U.S. while Hearts "The the face ofCanadian pop since form- Woods" (Cranley's favourite Stars ingin Montreal in the late 1990s. The track) is another lyrical and musical band consists ofTorquil Campbell on rhetoric about child'molestation and .. vocals/keyboards, Evan Cranley on . Peter Pan. bass/horos,·Amy Millan on vocals/ IMPRINT STAFF

A~~d'C~S~: '~c;J-" bOUd./ptog:tamtiUhg;$tru:S~

. ',' .

has been paralleled by indie darlings

lint"'!!lR,: .

to tOt1.Ol!ll·mtI~!t··

good music? tle does not think so•.




Arts & Crafts label-mates. Touring in support of their excellent third LP Set Yourse!foll Fire, Stars challenged themselves and entered a state ofisolation to focus on producing the best product they could. "We wrote it and recorded it over five weeks in the townships in Quebec during the dead of winter," says Cranley. "So we were forced to live with each other and write all this music because it was such a confined space. The fact that it was winter and we were away from all these distractions really set the tone for the writing of this record. The reason why it's deeply personal is because it was only us in the house at all times. We draw from memory and images and the record sounds the way that we were at the . time." An initial reaction you get when listening to Stars' albums is one of emotional heartbreak, coinciding with clever pop hooks. The addition of horos, strings and programming help define their unique sound. But don't mistake Stars' pop as the same crap that's currently spewed off the airwaves. Cranley explains, "There's a lot of bad things about pop music because people kind of just write a basic pop song and they feel thaes enough. I feel the sentimentality of pop music is to latch it in a sort of veneer that makes it trendy or cool to listen to, [whereas] the message or honesty ofwhat's happening right now is totally missed behind the idiom. I hope that [Stars] are bringing that message back because it's a real honest way of making music. Right now, pop music is really dishonest and corporate and giving

where my job is the best job anyone can have. I getto\vrire m\L<Uc, play any instrument I want, and we get to touch people and capturetheirattention. It's a really big challenge for me and Stars is something that let's me .do that. "BSS for me is completely different music. I have the chance to be more improvisational - I started offas a hom player and arranger. I feel that I can be more of a performer with BSS. It's funny because I started both bands at the same time and they both started to get noticed a bit more. ''I've been through alotwith StarS. I've been to jail with these people, I've shared one baguette with four other people, stayed in a room with no heat, gone through break-ups and make'ups with these people- so I think I'd stick with my family, Stars. It's ahorrible thing to say. I need both of these bands in mylife in order to live. They're both my soul- it's a very schizophrenic life IIead." Cranley and his bandmates are really looking forward to coming to Waterloo again. Being here in recent months with Broken Social Scene has showed them how great of a town it is to play. "We played Fed Hall, Bomber and the old Trasheteria but [Starlight} is one of my favourite cl~bsin thecountty. The people there are great." Stars are playing at the Starlight January 26 with Gentleman Reg. Tickets are $12 and can be bought at Orange Monkey or at the door. For more information on Stars see W\ starS.

Stars strike a pose - Catch them at the Starlight Social Club on January 26.

Peds exec missing from campus UW community fights to help VP admin and finance return Bianca Tong IMPRINT STAfF

As the winter termswings'into the end of its third week, Feds is still minus one executive. VP Administration and Finance RaveelAfzaal has been missing from campus, having been detained at the hands of the Pakistani government. Afzaal, who went home to visit family over the holidays, misplaced his passport and Canadian visa and

had to reapply for another at the One of four Feds executives, Canadian High Commission. His ap- Afzaal immediately enlisted the help plication was denied. ''They refused of UW's President David Johnston me the visa on the basis that they did and Catharine Scott, associate provnot feel that I had a legitimate reason ost, HR and student services. The to go to Canada and that they did not , school sent out an official letter on know iEI would tcturn back to Paki- January 3 requesting Afzaal's expedistan ifgiven the visa," said Afzaal via tion. Scott nqted the urgency of the e-mail. Afzaal, a third-year actuarial situation: "The Feds are a very valuscience student, has been on a one- able part of the university process, year leave from his studies in order to and we recognized the need to act take on the full-time position of quickly." VPAP. See MIA, page 5



Who is your favourite wolan in the arts?

,.Ani DiFranco, she has her own record label...she's hotl" Mary Carothers 3B health sciences

Angelina Jone, she has a good heart." Shelly Steffler U

3B psych

Audrey Hepburn, she's beautiful and strong." Tina Wong

"Paris Hilton, she makes good movies." Matt Moody

4B urban planning

3B biology


Across 1. Counterfeiting specialty 5. ~'hy a hockey goalie looks so huge 9. Hybrid 14. Home to half of the Boxing Day tsunami's victim countries 15. Healing plant 16. Speaker sound transmission 17. Puts icing on the cake 18. Network connection point 19. Ski surface 20. One ofUWsmorevenerablep!'Ofs 23. Immaculate organization 24. Put your foot down 28. Always missmg on a vest 31. Walkingstick 33. To the hypothetical degree 34. Easier than a minimum security prison 36. Roger Branson's title 37. Not simply mine or yours 38..Manual motor 39. Pull the wool over their eyes 40. Romantic ballad 41. Argentinian capital 45. Northern deer 46. British backend 47. How to describe a hooker's leg in fish net stockings 48. How to incorrectly spell dyeable 50. Abominable snowman 51. Howto describe an elephant's hide or a leatherback's shell 57. North American flycatcher

60. Is the rat, rooster or dog next? 61. Religious symbol 62. Farewell 63. Home to the leaning tower 64. Move out with a tea towel 65. Shanghai into doing a job 66. Scraps tossed to the pigs 67. Half of a former British colony

Down 1. Bomb the midtenn 2. Sac-like reproductive structure 3. Om.nge Revolution Ground Zero 4. Reason for taking a bird course 5. The first big continent 6. Setting fora trendy Internet startup 7. The most fambus extinctiSpecies 8. Perceives by sight . 9. Medie'\--al steel helmet 10. Calm periods in activity 11. Medieval Tokyo 12. Key part of plastic surgery 13. Bambi's mother 21. Smafllactress recently seen in The COflljJa!!J

22. Debts collected at the Pearly Gates


I' I "Karen Kain, she's light on herfeet." Aleeya Mohammed and Amy Galbraith

"Penelope Cruz, she's so so so hot." Farhaad Virjee

25. Protect from damage 26. Fungi stems 27. Separate the wheat from the chaff 28. Herded out of the room 29. Adverb heard three doors down 30. "I have fpund it!" 31. Japanese peace symbol 32. Flight properties 35. Floral sounding fish eggs 39. Lose power 41. How the Brits exit a burning plane 42. Urine ingredient 43. Toothy mountain ranges 44. Voting against 49. Censored word 50. Key bread ingredient 52.l\-fissed by a proofreader . 53. Second in line 54. Audible deja yu 55. In the near future 56. British tonsil-hockey 57. Industrial sucker 58. Proper response at the wedding 59. Spanish river





1B science and business

4B health sciences and 4A health studies

3. "






"David Suzuki's daughter, he's the shit and she's hot." Jeff Harti

"The Donnas, they're an allgirl band that doesn't suck." Kyle Faust


4A environmental studies

4A arts








UW engineering talent exposed in a brilliant and creative fashion Rob Blom




Once again, a collaborate of gizmos and gadg-ets circulated the main halls of the Davis Centre as the annual Elec1rical and Computer Engineering (EeE) Graduating Student Final Project Showcase was underway on \1\7 ednesday,]anuary 19. The early morning sent over a hundred V;latedoo graduatu1.g students scurrying about, anxiously preparing their stands, "howcase all they have accomplished within

The president of Harvard University is under fire for saying that men al"C biologicallyindinoo to do better than women in science. President L,m.vl"enccSummerswas speakirlgataconfcrenceon \.vomen and minorities in saL'nees and engineering, ,,:hen he stRted tharmales in high school get better grades in math and science than tC.maies. He stated thatitis t=auscofgeneticsratbcrthan socialfdCtors, JJke discriminationin the school system and that the 10\vm.a:ntl(~rofwomcn employedin scientific fields was representative of their flbjjitie<;. A member of the Women's Rights Network at IJilJYard claims that "the percentage ofwomen professors oHercd tenure has declined under Dr. Summc,""S." 1guess at an Ivy League school, sexism, like everything else, is part of the curriculmn.


This year the projects \vere se1.:!;!egated mainly into medical and etfergy-·eftkiency innoyations. Each group of four graduates had something unique and beneficial to offer for the betterment of mankind. The future was visited as many onlookers were given an abundance ._--.- if not an overload -- of information dealing with the general capabilities, design and overall functionality of the prototype visited. 'The welJ-known phrase, "Laziness is the mother of all inventions" came surprisingly dose to describing many of the inventions on display. One such invention, the voice-con·trolled universal remote, continues the natural trend ofinherited laziness as we go from heavy labour (rnoving our arms and fingers) to only our speech controlling television and other electrical appliances. Imagining the day of actually geLling up to turn channels seems already so distant -- almost farfetched. Other inventions included the continual research of the hydrogen fuel cen as a future solution to the present energy crisis. The magnetic train that was built upon a wired track had proposed a more feasible way for people to travel. The Air-Rockey table, although lacking in any decent proposal as a future b(!nefit to seemed to have no trouble attracting the crowd and a (leccnr opponent. The wireless section had much to offer, generally in the form of a laptop, phone or \vebcarn using GPS systems, REj\i technology, RSF chips and any other three-letter com-


Team W.I.L.D. members Tommy Rakic, Kevin Quan, Bvavesh Mistry and Mike Sonnenberg (not pictured) showcase their Where's Waldo innovation during the ECE student final projects at the Davis Centre on Wednesday. binatiotl you can think of. Such inventions any user to open and have include a sdftrackingwcbcam, variable cruise a real-time system compute infonnation based upon a specified location control - handy for reading the morning -----.-----~---------.-- defined by where you're paper ---\ved, a sophisstandilig." Such technolThe wen-known ticated phone service ogy could forecast and other various soupcoming movies when phrase, I/laziness is lutions to our ever you're near a movie theatre, the mother of all growing technological recognize if specific books are available if near a library needs. inventions" came One wireless and other seemingly endsurprisingly close to project was from team less functionality. Mistry W .I.L.D. (Wireless Inansi other group members, describing of the telligent Location Disbekg heavily driven by marinventions on display. keting and advertising, covery) as their \1ii11.ere's ._____________.__ hrainstormed this technolWaldo invention took front and centre of the ogy as a \vay to get infonnaDC main hall. Their technology, explained by tion across quickly and efficiently. team member BvaveshMistry, would "enable The medical area surfaced suc h technology as digismart pens. a way to save a lot of hassle and ink. I\lso the life support system, a \nice controlled \vnedchair bnlille will

Canadian Immigration Minister Judy Sgro resigned from her post last Friday in light of allegations made by a pizza shop owner. Harjit SUlgh, an,.1Wlt ftom India who accused S<:n:n.C{}!1{; eise'ts pa~spor~ that Sgro olfered to protecthi.m from deportation ifne delivered pizza and garlic bread to her campaign office and organized over a dozen people to heip with her campaign. Liberal 1',\1 Paul Martin has reluctantly accepted the resigna-tion of Sgro, ,vho says she will fight Singh's accusations "with every measure at my disposal." Sgro remains under investigation by the ethics commissioner of parliament f()rgrantlnga tern· porary residency permit and an extended work permit to a Romanian stripper who worked on her campaign. Four days of near-continuous rain in Vancouver, British Columbia have triggered a series of mudslides across the city. Over seventy homes were evacuated, and oneW01uan still remains missing. Several houses were completely destroyed tium the mudsIide.] t is CX1Jccted that the rains responsible for the disaster will "\vorscn in

hr,h,-;" i

mle 1110dels within our become dOHors. others may f()lluw ofa Ihousand

such fine examples of tackle the future problems our world \vill miles

John Peart and Zamir Khan from the The refreshable digital braille clock project. Absent from the photo are Matt Reid and Far-sad Nasseri.



hreeme still face charges in ed Natai Shelsen SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

The charges have been dropped against one of the men accused in the beating of a UW student outside Federation Hall after the 2003 New Year's Eve party. Three men still face charges. Nicholas Brathwaite will not face t11alin connection with the beating ofUW student Ramsay .Hanlon. According to Brathwaite's la'WJ'Cf, Steven Gehl, the "judge decided there was no evidence that he was involved in the assault on Ramsey Hanlon orthathe was a party to it." This decision was made after considering the information presented in the preliminary hearing. Charges

were also dropped abrainst Jason Hopkins, a Waterloo student at the time of the beating, due to lack of evidence. Three men from J\fis sis sauga, Joseph John, Christopher Carter and David Mizra are still being charged \vith aggrivated assaultin connec-tion with the beating that left Hanlon with a brain injury after he was repeatedly ki.cked and punched. The beating caused more than just Ramsay Hanlon's severe injuries. It also set offa series of events, beginning \v1th the shutdown of both Fed Hall and the BomberinJ ammry 2003 due to safety and management concerns. For instance, on the night of the beating, no sign-in was

all beatin

required of non-U\X! students. 'This would have linked them to a \Y'aterloo studen t ifhis Iher ID cards were swiped by the deviees that read the magnetic stripes. The animosity was perpetuated when Feds launched an $11 million lawsuit against the University ofWaterIoo, citing claims of negligence and breach of contract. The reasoning behind the suit was to get theirovm liquor licence or become a co-licensee. The suit was eventually dropped six months later, after two mediation sessions between the disputing parties brought about an agreement: the university would maintain the liquor licence, although the proceeds would flow first through

U\Y! administration to pay expenses and then be remitted to Feds, as all proceeds of liquor sales must legally gb to the liquor licensee. In addition, a full-time manager of bar operations (a new position created by the settlement) would be at each bar at all times of operation, for reasons of consistenq and accountability. Due to the private nature ofmedical records, itis difficultto say how Ramsay Hanlon is doing now_ Olaf Heinzel, coordinator of public affairs for Waterloo Regional Police, believes the victim continues to experience some residual difficulties. \liTe can only hope that he, like the dispute between the Feds and UW administration, has healed.

MIA: VP admin an finance duties may be prioritized Continued from cover

j\ fzaal\ re-application for another visa has been turned down, but upon receipt of another letter from U\l(/ requesting the overtu.rning of the visa rejection decision, the appeal has been retabled. "\Ve have every expectation of his return to school in May of2005. We've also listed his courses and enlisted the help of a faculty member," said Scott of the school's efforts. There has also been an offer to wl1te a letter to our tIP, should the matter not be resolved. A decision is expected by early next week. Fecls has been scrambling in a concerted effort to cover Afzaal's duties. In lieu of his absence, President Becky \'x/roe has been monic-mail inbox and phone messages to the <.louble duties. There has been much support from the other Jeff Henry VPI John are

.,~ ad~

mined \X'roe, "but delegation is key." Afzaai sits 011 a number of committees; among them th,:: SLC Management Board and the university

committee on alcohol use and education, which constitution, with aid from students' council and the other studentgovenlmental positions. oversees bar operations, suspensions and fines. Afzaal is optimistic enough to see the huThis is not the first time that a VP AF has mour in the situation: "Since I understand that been absent from the Feds executive;lastyeat's rowing myself to Canada is not a feasible opVPAF Dave Capper left lJW in February to tion, especially in this weather, we definitely pursue an employment opportunity, leaving need a solid continthe three rern,aining Fcds executives to cover gene}" plan in easel am unable to return to IISince I understand that the bases. Canada." \\'hen asked which rowing myself to Canada issues \vereimportant Because there has to keep at the forefront, beenalotofuncertaintr is not a feasible option, surrounding Afzaal's Afzaal had a number of situation, no perma·- especially in this weather I key recommendations. nent plans have been we definitely need a solid "The proposed dental made. The board of plan is referencontingency plan .. ," clm:;ct().rs, tbe dents to be educated level decision-making about the plan and then body ofFeds, has been <'"'-'Raveel Afzaal to the ref L'1formed of the ong:oerendurn. "'(Ie have beel1 this I ,',-ould like; he students to decide \vhether the out a formal contl,m"eD:CY not be allowed to return to Canada, the remainstudents would like to have dental coverage or not." Students \I'ill vote on the dental plan ing Feds will divy up his duties as dictated by the

during the Feds election, February 15-17. The future of Bomber renovations and the revival of Fed Hall arc also high priorities on Afzaal's agenda. As to Afzaal's international student platform, he is stin interested in ensuring international fees for foreign students stay affordable in an effort keep t..~e University ofWaterloo an attractive place for the outside world and has been in talks with VPAcademic & Provost Arnit Chakma. Afzaal is still willing to do his job at least partially ftom his hometown of Islamabad_ Should he retun;, Afzaalis eager to make up for lost time. "It is really sad that this one ve.ry critical month has been taken away trom me. J as 1 can ... and with the great team v,-e we can accomplish our goals, in his Haifis deal:: "\Ve han" a very tCl!rtl G'iJ>::_,l"'" !ik(:. to. thank the rest of the our manager and the accounting department for all the help they have offered."

s elections 100m accom anied by vague promises With Feds elections coming, you need to be in the know ers between February 1··14, here are a few things to watch out for: Let', stattwith Afzaal's seat, that of vin;-president of administration and ftnance.l11c ,,'PAl' is the "money" person, overseeingrhe preparation of the Feds' multi-million dollar budget 'Hie YPAF's other big job is overseeing the activities of the Feds' businesses: Fed Hall, the Bomber, the Used Bookstore, Aussies, Scoops/ It's been thl'ee \'\-eeks now and the Feds' VP on \Vasabi! and what has DOW become the SLC Tim administration and finance, Raved AtZaal, still Hortons. Afzaal was elected on a platform that has not shown up to work. Returning to Pakipromised innovation ----yetv:ihenhis tem1 ofoffice stan on the Christmas holidays to see family, officially expires Apl1l30, how AfzaaI's visa was denied --------"-_.many things on his Est\villhave when he tried to return to Cmada. To date, he Still, something inside bcen accomplished? A proven remains tied up in thc me longs for the Feds tracku'())rdofaccompJishments would be a good thing to seek appeals process the days gone by, where in a VP.Af' candidate. latest word out of the Next,let's take a look at the Feds' office is that his controversy and most political of positions: the appea!has been opened vice-presidmtofeducation. The again after U\\' sent a partisan politics "PED is the academic repreletter to the Pakistani dominated council. sentative, wnomeets with 1\1P" government on his bef\f:PPs,studentlobbyingorganih~tlL The truly shocking zatiom, [J\'{"ssenatcandawidc parr? Only a small percentage of his thousands range of other political smkcholdel"S on studenrof constituents have notiCt~d that he is gone. focused education issues. 'H1e currcntincumbent, Ilere is some fnod felr thought as we head ent?l1cering b'fad Jeff , has by aU accounts into this year's annual Federation of Students done a stelL'\!' job. He's kept his nose out of trouble executive elections. while managing to get more than a fC'.",things done. Wben campaigning coml11ences and the camStill, something inside me longs for the Feds pus i5 covered in bright, colourful, smiling post

days gone by, wherqcontroversy and partisan politics dominated council. Henry's predecessors in the ·"'PED seat .illduded the ultra-conservative Ryan O'Connor and "bleedsNDP-orange" Lim111\kHughRusseH Like fireworks, these times made Feels council fUll to watch . -YOU may have been burned if you were too dose to the action. Next, let's SGu} the race f.xvice-presidentinter-· nal. \),'/atch out for the tried-?_ud,true campaign piatforJ11s of"more money / attention to the Feds' dubs and services" ----it's beenapartoftheatt(c"1npr at sellingthatne:3.xIy every candidate has made over thehLstfewyears. \VatchaJso forevet)' candidat.e t,x this seat to give you the exact same answers to gue~tions at election fimuTIs--- there'51·c2Jly only so many promises these people can make. aU

means, the YPI race is the leas. exciring to watch. :Here's hoping we see some action this year. Finally, the race for president, Some have noted that S("Udl~nt fJn:."!UeJfH~ public perception of their '·e~"nn<1 and authority than the entails. 1\tno time is dlis more apparent thart during the Feds campaigns, when the dose of a campaign piatf()rm sees such ambiguou~ prom ises as "better communication," "better representation" and "greater accountability. " Vote for one of these people and you win get ---. what? Still, the race is neyer a dull one, ",cith plenty of competition for the seat. Let's just hope that nobody brings year.




>Debt relief one penny at a time'

University of



infrastructure and poorly conceived demands have always been demands ideas inevitably drove a country into of those organizations who held the debt. Promises of the stars, fell to reins of debt restructuring. pieces at the stroke of midnight. The key point of the HIPC is that ThankfuHy, this has begun to 'once the debtor country has traveled change. .. . aloogthe i>at4ofrefonn to the approThe keystone of the watershed priatelYflameclCornpleti6tlPoint, they movementis theHeavily IndebtedPoor . are eligible for complete debt relief. A Countries (HIPq initiativeas proposed complereand total \vrite-off. A clerui Canadian Finance :Minister Ralph Goodale announced this past Monby the World Bank and the Intetna- slate. day that his govet11?lentwas going to tionalMonetaryFund.LittledidIthink The HIPC has been a long time a,Jcw ~~ago that I might possibly coming. For a1tD.ost a declloe, various forgive the balan'(:e of Madagascar's foreigndebtowe9ioCanada. Gtan~:~~niceto say about either NGOs, includingJubilee 2000 which $21 million is merely a drop in .the'·:d~d1ganizations. But truth be is pushing for complete debttelieffor .bucket of the estiffiated $700 million ttfd,ffil&' qebt relief plan holds some poor countries, and responsible naWlitir.Th~debtwillbeforgiventather tions have pushed groups like the owed to Canadaby the world's poorest natioJ1s, or an even smaller drop simplyanothertestructuting. World Bank, the Il\fF, and the shad~ltis a,greed thatadebtorcoun- owy Paris Clhb (essentially the G8 by when compared tothe$4biIlion owed tryCiiitto longer pull itselfout ofdebt another name with checkbooks) to by Madagascat to thetest ofthe world. Needless to say, however, every drop and ~is willing to reform its ways relieve debtor countries of this debt. and find a solution,it becomes eligible Ironically, most ofthis debt came from in the bucket counts. To put the $21 millionintopet~.i£evetyCanaforthetnPc. TheHIPCrequites poor the poorer countries paying the richer dian were to donate ~epriceof a Tim c~* to demonstrate how i~ ~ countries for goods and services that tutI11fi>economyaround, tacklernstl- they could not afford. Billions ofdolHorton's doughnut, weoould collectutionhl problems and change to be- lars worth. tively forgive the Malagasy debt. The mystery of the debt is that it come a better place. Twenty-one million dollars is hatdly was allowed to grow to such heights in Reforms typically include demands anything. You could inaugurate halfa to move to more democtatic and less president for that cost. Or ask Julia the first place. The easiest exPlanation for the often exponential debt is that corrupt governments; reducing mili- Roberts to stat in your next film. But as these countries moved fr0m subtatyspendingandinsteadspendmoney for someone making $290 a year, a little on capital projects, like health andedu- bit goes a long way. sistence development, and typically .satisfying only theirimmediately local cation facilities; and perhaps more odiI'm willing to forgive Mada,gascar ous, open themselves up to the winds for the price ofa Tim Horton's dough. "needs, each national government, in turn, tried to match the level ofdevelof the free market. Granted, the latter nut. Are you? opment that they saw north of the pointis perhaps less palatable than the equator. EXP:nsive civil and defence former two, and in reality these three

Rae'ReView arriving in: 'February Alex Doukas SPECIAL TO IMPRINT



The future of Ontario universities hangs in the balance. Both uw and Feds have submitted responses to the ongoing Postsecondary Review, which will help to determine the future of funding and operations in post-secondary education. Theuniversity's response urges support forco-opetative education, while Feds emphasized increased funding, accessibility and accountability within the postsecondary education system. Commissioned by the Ontario provincial goverflment in their 2004 budget, the Postsecondary Review is headed by former Premier Bob Rae, and is commonly referred to as the Rae Review. The goals of the commission are to "review the design and funding of Ontario's postsecondary education system and recommend innovative ways in which our institutions can provide the best education to students and supporiOntario's prosperity," according to a statement on the Review's official website. A major recommendation in the UW submission calls for student financialassistanceprograms to account for full educational costs, including living and tuition costs, while incorpotating loan repayment programs ,dependant on income, "with features such as interest relief and partial debt forgiveness dependent on income post graduation." The Feds report is distinctly different in some areas. ''We did have a dialogue with them as they drafted it and provided comments. On the

whole we a,greed with some ofit, had no opinion on some of it, and disagreed on part of it - their tuition policy-where we agreed todisa,gree," Feds VP education Jeff Henry said. Major discrepancies in the two submissions were the areas of tuition regulation and financial support distribution. . the Feds report states, "the provincial government must provide enough funding to cover no less than 70 pet cent of the cost of university education in Ontario, with that funding being guaranteed by an act oflegislation. Students, therefore, must never cover more than 30 per cent of the cost," including through the burden of loan programs. Another recommendation urges government to increase university operating funding 50percentby2011, withatleasthalfof the new funding in place by 2007. The recommendations have a view to increasing provincial funding to the national average over the next half- " decade. Ontario currently has the lowest university funding per student in Canada. Another section of the Feds response advises universalized tuition regulation in Ontario to ensure that student costs are predictable and to safeguard financial aid programs. The 20-pa,ge report also proposes that "[s]tudents must be full and equal participants in thegovemance, accountability, and assessment of institutions," with recommendations that postsecondary institutions be subject to the Freedom ofInformation Act. Accountability issues are also addressed, with a suggestion that stu-

dents be represented in at least 25 per cent of positions available on institutional governing bodies. Both Feds' and UWs responses overlap in supporting co-operative education, but the Feds response, entitled "Investing in a Bright Future," focuses on the importance of public funding for postsecondary education. Co-op programs are highlighted in the UW submission, which requests "a20 per cent premium forco-operative education as part ofthe provincial funding formula to recognize the extra teaching costs and provide an incentive for growth [within the co-op program]." It also recommends that the provincetaise employer tax credits to $2500 per work term as an increased incentive to hire co-op students. The remainder of the U\V report focuses on the importance ofincreased funding to research programs as importantinvestments that provide substantial returns. In a letter to the Review, lNlPresident David Johnston said, "[t]he higher education system is where the government will frnd rhe research, knowledge base, and resources to advance its vision ofa stronger and more prosperous Ontario. The health ofthe higher education system must be bolstered and safeguarded." The final draft of the review could be released as early as February, although the volume of responses from universities and other groups could delay its publication. The Rae Review's website anticipates that final recommendations will be available "early in 2005."



Modern love and courtship in Waterloo? Who knew? Kimberly Zheng, at

Mark Johnson and Rob 810m IMPRINT STAFF

Entrepreneurs cash in In a bid to spark entrepreneurial activity, the Ignition Pitch Competitionannounced three winners Thursday evening atWLU. The three students each got $1 ,000 in cash at the inaugural competition, held in the Paul Martin Centre. Patticipants from UW, WLU and the community each presented a 9O-second "devat0r" pitch to a distinguished group of judges. The event was part of a series of competitions and workshops that form the LaunchPad 50K New Venture Creation Competition. The LaunchPad 50K competitio,n is a majorpartnership between V;'LU and the UW. Over $50,000 in cash prizes and in-kind services have yet to be won. LauchPad 50K provides a wealth of resources for team-building, mentorship and networking. Anyone who is looking for a great idea to turn into a business, who has a great idea but doesn't know where to start, or who simply wants to be involved in an excitingnewventwte~~cout." aged to St.'C the LaunchPad $50K website at w\ or contact the Co-Director at UW,

institutional living environments. As well, the RIA has received a $2 million donation from Ron Schlegel, Sex speech at UW a former faculty member in health studies at UW who is now president On Wednesday,January 26th, sex and co-owner ofthe VillageofW'mston columnist Josey Vogels will be visiting the UW campus. . Park, a local retirement community. Additional in-kind contributions of Vogels is the author of columns entitled, "My Messy Bedroom" and space and infrastructure will be availablein seven otherlinked. facilities across "Dating Girl". She has been called "Canada's the province. Carrie The Bradshaw". money will Vogels support inwill be giving frastructure alecture, "'Jbe and new opmysteries and portunities, such as seed pleasures of modem love money for and courtresearch, a ship," held visiting from 5:30 unscholar proti17pmmArts gram, workLecture Hall shops and room 113. Atconferences, tendance is along with COURTESYWWW.MYMESSYBEDROOM.COM free for UW student students. scholarships. After her presentation, V ogels will Research related to lowvision, fallbe holding a question and answer . prevention, joint replacement, cersession. ebrovascular blood flow, dementia, For more information, contact quality of life and evaluation of best practices has never been more relevant Jennifer Diebolt,ASU vice-president as Canada's population ages, \vith the co'irumlnications, at 888-4567,extenfastest growth rate seen among those sion2322. over 80 years old. At UW, there are researchers across thecampus'WithcxSenate approves Research pertise in the health is~ues of an older Institute nnpulatt'on .. .. J r"';"", ~\,' o~t '* , TheuniversitY~1fsM~ed The''iLgeof\'\·'inStori Park, \\<ilich the establishment ofa Research Instirotc for Aging to t."flhance the care of has been offering a continuum ofcare to seniors for more than 35 years in the seniors in both community-based and d


Good news for students! Dalton McGuinty'sLiberals have delivered on yet another campaign promise and raised the minimum wage- set to hit $7.45 per hour on February 1. We stilllag behind provinces such as Quebec and Manitoba, but this is definitely a step in the right direction. It has become cleat that corporations ate driven by greed - and the desperate need to maximize profitsand can't be trusted to voluntarily raise .wages for starving students or single mothers. Our caring government needed to step in. While! am not affected by the minimum wage hike, theincrease is a sound method to offset the spiraling rents caused by the ineptitude ofMike Hartis' Conservative government. Dutingthe nine years of Conservative reign, wages for most workers rose an average of 16 per cent. What raise did minimum wage earners get? Zero. Oh,don'tworry-therichreceived many tax breaks to balance out the poor getting screwed!

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A slap in the face of corporate greed \'\I'hy do vulnerable people get stuck in minimum-wage jobs? For one thing, we have men getting women pregnant and then bolting. Single mothers often have little choice but to take a job that can fit their hectic schedule. "Many outlets are hesitant to hlrepregnantwomen knowing they'll just be going on maternity leave in a few months' time. Working at Wal-Mart may not outfit people with the bestoflivingconditions, butit does put food on the table. Somehow I doubt Wal-Mart will deliver wage increases anytime soon. The Liberals and NDP have long advocatedminimumwagehikes. What about the Conservatives? Not onlywas there no mention of minimum wage hikes in the Ontario Conservatives' election platform of2003, butin 2000, when theywere still called the Canadian Alliance,the Conservative Party of Canada actually promised to hike income taxes fQr the poor! Now there's a helping hand! Fortunately,theLiberalsarelooking to implement a mechanism to ensure that even if the Regressive Conservatives manage to lie their way back into power, minimum wage earners v,ill not be screwed. ; Labour :r..Hnister Chris \Bentley wants "to make sure that the most vulnerable ate notthelastinline, but the firstin line." Ontarians need legislated protection from the corruption that

Kitchener-Waterloo area, will "pro- . . ~Sks each Canadian to reduce their vide a physicalampus for1ndepend- ·grCenhousegasemission byone-tonne ent and care-giving accommodation or 20 per cent annually. To calculate where residents are part of a living your emissions please refer to the nalaboratory," Schlegel said. tion website at The RIA will be linked with AHS and re.searchers from all faculties on Suzuki will appear in the SLC at the UW campus. The focus of the 4:30pm for a student sym~sium, institute's work will be to translate one that he did over 30 years ago, as research into practice. The primary well as in the ML building at 8pm to funding for projects will come from speak to the community. He will disgoveromentagencies. cuss questions addressing his new book, Tree: A Lift Story and other Suzuki and the One-Tonne related topics. Admission is free at the Challenge SLC and various titles will be available Rick Mercer's commercial of the while tickets for the ML discussion are One-Tonne Challenge is relayed to on sale for $11 for communitymemanother Canadian, David Suzuki, as bers and $6 for students through the he speaks on it onJanuary26, 2005. As Humanities Theatre box office bean environmentalist, Suzuki's lectures tween 12 and 5pm or calling 888-4908 are sure to heighten this community's awareness of greeenhouse gas emis- with flies from Daily Bulletin sions and how to reduce them. A product of Environment Canada:, the One-Tonne Challenge

permeates the Conservative Party. \Vhile Ontario was prospering in the late 1990s - thanks to a positive shlftingovemmentfiscalpolicybrought about not by Mike Hartis, but by Bob Rae's NDP government - the s~ils seemed to go almost exclusively to the rich. Welfatepaymentswerecut,rentcontroIs eliminated andratherthanbalancing the budget, !vfike Harris chose to give away tax cuts to his corporate buddies - and all this while thousands were toiling away at minimum wage jobs. Realistically, who deserves a wage hike? A singlemotherwhoworks a SOhourweek to pay the rent and put food on the table for her kids or a snobbish CEO who squanders his time making small talk at cocktail partieswhlle bringinghome a paycheckof$150,000? It is regrettable that many personal fortunes are made by people who simply maniPulate money -often on the backs of the working class-and contribute nothing to society. I think there can be no question that thepoorworkhatder-and have more wotries and more stress - than the rich. And yet, who gets coddled when the Conservatives are in power? The

rich Thankfully, no more!


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Imprint is published by Imprint Publication Student Life Centre 1116 University ofWaterloo Waterloo,ON N2L 3G1

Opinion and objective fact: both have a place

Editor's note: this column appeared at the bB?Jnning oj last term. It is being run againfor those readers who did not have the opportunitJ to see it the first time. There is aplacefor hardfacts as we/J as opinion in Imprint. Thispiece details the distinction between them. Newspapers are great aren't they? They keep us informed and entertained. Let's admit it, the most entertaining things in a newspaper are often the letters to the editor. Most of the time it seems that every Tom, Dick and Harry thinks he knows better than the editors and writers. (Sometimes every Tom, Dick

and Harry does indeed know better and can write better too.) Letters to the editor are my favourite part of a newspaper, but for a different reason than their entertainment value. It is fantastic to see readers respond to the work editors toil over. Letters that point out valid errors keep us on our toes and motivate us to perfect our pages. Some letters express a genuine difference of opinion and these enrich the dialogue that newspapers are constandy engaged in with their readers. After all, part of Imprints mission statement vows to provide 芦a forum for the discussion ofissues that affect the [UW] community." Whether lmprint pisses you off, or you think there's something that wasn't quite right in a paper, or even if you think there's something that would bevaluable to add, everyone is more than w~lcome to write letters to the editor

and participate in this discussion. However, there are some distinctions between different types of content in this and other newspapers that are occasionally lost on readers. 1. would like to take this opportunity to clarify these distinctions and hopefully provide readers (and letter writers) with a better chance to reach informed opinions about Imprint. When a news, sports, or science article is written, the writer's opinion is not relevant to the story and should not be included in it. The purpose of such articles is to report the facts and consult relevant sources in doing so. An arts or features article may be different. When reviewing a movie, for example, arts writers do include their own opinions of the movies, but they strive to assess them from a point ofview that would be useful to readers. Features writing can include a writer's perspective in this way, orit

can be written as aninvestigative news piece, or it can even use more creative means of expression. An opinion article, as the name suggests, is pure opinion. If a writer offers factual evidence to back up his/ her claims, chances are pretty good that he/ she will mention supporting evidence rather than researching into the ways that his/her opinion is wrong. A column is also the expression of one writer's opinion. Imprintdisperses columns throughout its pages. Columns in the news section, for example, allow writers to give their opinions about anything news-related. My advice is this-when you read a column, if it delights you or if it makes you want to retch, look at the litde picture of the author. You are reading one person's opinion. Differences of opinion happen all the time.

Take a deep breath and if you'r still pissed off after that, rather tha: complaining to the guy next to rot write us a letter! Let me hold you hand for a moment and point ou that such letters can be e-mailed t,, 0 Remember, those writers who ex press their opinions onImprints page have just as much right to their con victions as you have to yours. If you're still pissed off - gues what? Imprint is a volunteer-fuele, creature. If you want to have you voice heard then come down to SL< 1116 and write for Imprin~ V olun teers are always welcome. A word to the wise, however. I yo~ work here and you still can'tgras] the distinction between a news articl and an opinions piece, I may just kiel your ass until you get it. editor@imprint.uwaterloo.c

otorists are not the greedy government's slush fund

It sounds so horrible: speeding. The word conjures images of red-faced, tridenH,vielding, pointy-eared maniacs careening do\V'tl a busy street. I can hear the readers now: ''1 never speed." You have never-even once - exceeded a posted speed limit? Ever? If your answer to the above is a truthful "affirmative," speed on ovc;:r to Extreme Centre f~rpeople who have deluded themselves into sainthood. Everyone else, read on. In preparation for writing this article, I discovered the so-called "antidriving lobby." What a perfecdy fitting description for the topic at hand.

The anti-driving lobbyists (whoeV('''ftherare-JackLaytonandaband of kangaroos, I, supposetare hurting tanadians by: " 'k, - Supporting increast.'<.l government revenue in the name of"saving lives." -Alienating police and the population they senre. - Avoidingmoreimpottant safedriving issues by focusing on speed-

tion when enforcement agencies cancasll:mb from your average schmoe on his~y to'wo.rk. Unlike criminals, motorists have impoundable cars.illd plenty ofidentifying numbers and papen;mrk that

make them more likely to pay fines. :\Iowrists are also more plentiful than criminals and far easier to cat;ch. As pedestrians, police make US feel safeandwdcomOO.Butasdm路crs~poJice

OneBBCcommentatorputitbesl by "pcrsecuting and alienating th motorist [wfl art!. ~,,~.ct;,cre,ating, barrier between most of the popula tion and thcpolke."

make us nerw)Us (."\-en if we are not consciously erring. \vby is that?

See CAR, page 1!

ing Municipalities have no constitutional right to exist and very little taxation power. 'What has that situation created? Speeding fines: a little bit of your freedom for a little more lining in the government's pocketbook. Speeding fines and many other motorist fees are simply stealth taxes carefully marketed as life-savingmeasures. In other words, why bother with



Editorial Staff Editor-in-chief, Laura Katsirdakis editor@imprint,uwaterloo,ca Assistant Editor, Tim Alamenciak Cover Editor, Kelley Dilkes News Editor, Bianca Tong News Assistant, Rob Blom Opinion Editor, Jeff Anstett Opinion Assistant, l\lark Johnson Features Editor, Scott Houston Features Assistant, Darren Huts Arts Editor, Dave George-Cosh Arts Assistant, Ian Blechschmidt Science Editor, Penny Michelle Rorke Science Assistant, Michael L Davenport Sports Editor, Sarah Allmendinger SportS Assistant, Dan Micak Photo Editor, Mohammed Jangda Photo Assistant, Kirill Levin Graphics Editor, Julian Apong Graphics Assistant, Hitoshi Murakami

true dctectiveworkandcrimepre,,-en-

Friday, January 14, 2005 Student Life Centre 1116

editor-in-chief gets a prize.

Vol. 27, No. 22


II: 519.884.7800 P: 519.888.4048

Waterloo, ON N2L 3G1

Web Editor, Daniel Kangmin Ko Web Assistant, vacant Systems Administrator, Javed Iqbal Lead Proofreader, Dean Whelton Proofreader, Emie Lau Proofreader, Ruhan fulhman Proofreader, Kaitlin Ojamae Proofreader, Shauna Solomon

Board of Directors President, Andrew Dilts Vice-president, Erin Gilmer Treasurer, Neal Moogk-Soulis Secretary, Margie Mansell Staff liaison, Durshan Ganthan staffJiaison@imprint.uwaterloo,ca

Office Staff General manager, Catherine Bolger cathy.bolger@imprint,uwater\ Advertising & production manager, Laurie Tigert-Dumas' ads@imprint, Production Assistant, Jacqueline McKoy Advertising Assistant, Lauren Fox Distribution, vacant Distribution, vacant Volunteer co-ordinator, Kirika Bissell

Production Staff Sabrina Bo,",=, Claire Mousseau, Simon Yarrow, Stacey Hannam, Durshan Ganthan, Phil Wiener

Editorial submissions may be considered for publication in any edition of Imprint. Imprilll may also reproduce the material commercially in any format or medium as part of the newspaper database, Web site or any other product derived from the newspaper. Those submitting editorial content, including articles, letters, photos and graphics, will grant Imprilll first publication rights of their submitted material, and as such, agree not to submit the same work to any other publication or group until such time as the material has been distributed in an issue of Imprint, or Imprint declares their intent not to publish the ,material. The full text of this agreement is available upon request.

Imprilll is published every Friday during fan and winter tenns, and every second Friday during the spring tenn. Imprilll reserves the right to screen, edit and refuse advertising, Imprint PublicatioflS is not responsible for advertisng mistllkes beyond the cost of the advertisement. One copy per customer. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Imprilll CDN Pub Mail Product Sales Agreement no. 40065122.

Next staff meeting: Monday, January 24 12:30p.m., SLC 1116 Next production night: Wednesday, January 26 5:30 p.m., SLC 1116

Imprill! does not guarantee to publish atticles, Imprinl is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, \'I;'aterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprilll i~ a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association ()('''N.\).

photographs, letters or advertising. Material may not be published, at the discretion of Imprint, if that material is deemed to be libelous or in ca'ntravention with Imprillis policies with respect to our code of ethics and joumalisti~ standards. The first person to go to the lmprillt office and talk '"'~th the

Next board meeting: To be announced ...





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the bottom of my rnfud like a news ticker hopped up on speed. As I sit here, I can't help but draw an analogy (hey, whatever it takes to distract me - it's a survival tactic)this car is a microcosm of some small and volatile country. There's the rnfuority (me) and the majority (them). There's the border ~stsomerecentgradsaretaking divisions (seats) and the disputed no .â&#x20AC;˘exotic trips to Caribbean beaches, or man's land - the fickle middle seat. exciting cultural adventures in Asia., Incursions (a foot, an arm) into no or pet:,haps doing the classic man's land are met with covert (evil backpacking around Europe to exeye and a retaliatory foot) or not so perience the food, the history and covert (@#%$%)responses. the ambience, I am embarking on a There's the dictator in the majorjourney of much greater wonder ity, there are the hostilities that t\}n and, correspondingly, much greater deep (all the way back to the 1980s, risk. baby), there are the limited resources No, I'm not subdy hinting at (snacks, oxygen) and the debates "trips" induced by various botanical about the direction our "country" by-products, but something far more should take (east or west). self-destructive. I am talking about Then there are the atrocities and the parental road trip, known more blatant abuses of power. I speak of familiarly to some as the sound of course of forcing a young person of fingernails ona chalkboardaccornparelatively sound rnfud (that's supnied by hives and dry heaves. posed to be me) to endure seemingly Like the oftLused mantra by adendless hours of loud oldies and dicts, smokers, alcoholics arid dietopera (Chinese opera, no less - talk ers, I find myself assuring myself "I about cruel and unusual). Even armed know I've said it before, but this will with a bag full ofbatteries and an:MP3 be the absolutelast one, ever." player (I'm not stupid enough to But unlike the guilty pleasure the \eave without supplies -even kamismoker gets from his last smoke or the delicious remorse experienced by .. kaze Rllot~ wore ~elmets)~ I ",;as no . matclffor~estrengthofthelnatori­ ~e dieter's last taste of cheesecake, I ty's speakers, nor their off-key singonly have one feeling: let's hope I ing. ;..} .' .. .' survive. As we logged our n:llles do~titi?' N~,'unlike them, Ihave only one east coastof the United States, rolling feeling: let's hope I survive. That, past signs like "Arsenal- 3 miles" and the continuous loop of "stupid, twice (once in New York state and stupid, stupid... " running around

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Sports are, like, just so gay

RIM PARK (fromHu

once in Pennsylvania - Amerieans like their arsenals), Y ocurntown and Newberrytown (stop snickering) and, most frighteningly when you've just awoken from a car nap: ''1-Iexico - 3 miles" (probably the distance to a highway leading to Mexico, rather than Mexico itself), I began to hatch a plan. I would declare my liberation, fonn my own state, raise my flag (with a coffee bean in the centre, sugar to the right, cream to the'left) and christen my country "Serenoria" (Serenistan, Serenadaand the Republic ofSerenico were rejected for sounding stupid or too cocktail-like). As a newly-rnfuted, burgeoning country, I needed to learn the essentials ofrunning a modern democracy -luckily I was in America, a shining example. First, I'd need a constitution (after all, you can't trample on constitutionally guaranteed rights without first saying what they are - that'd be amateurish, a banana republic type thing to do - no, no, I wanted a . Patriot Act of my very own). Second,I'dneed a press secretary. Someone to teach me how to evade direct questions and to show me how to payoff pundits - that I don't currendy possess the $240,000 mat theJ3i.tsh 'administrlition posSet~"ed to pay off just one pundit, Armstrong

Despite all of the machjsmo surrounding organized sports, I've got to say, with some of the things that go on, they're some of the gayest things around. Sorry jocks, but it's true - take half of what you do out of whatever arena you do it in and you'd have social and religious conservative types falling over1n a dead faint. The world of contact sports is undeniably a testosterone-soaked one, I will give you mat, and it is within these arenas thatwe are taught the many cornerstones of the male machismo: don't cry; if you get hit, hit back; keep your eye on the ball; don't cry; if you get knocked down, get back up; no pain, no gain; and Do. Not. Cry. But, for all of this propaganda, the way many male athletes act would be far from what is seen as masculine if you simply changed the setting. Take basketball, for instance: nice macho sport with tall, sweaty guys running about "slamming" balls into litde metal hoops in front of barelyclad, bouncing cheerleaders. But the second any player comes off the court

after the shift it's like he's running the proverbial frat-house gaundet. It's nearly universal- the central method of congratulating a tea;runate is with a hearty smack on the ass. Try doing that to a classmate after a midterm: "Yeah! All Right! That &on 101 examrocked!*S~1ACK*" My bet says you'll not get a good reaction. And hey, it's not just basketball, it happens in most major sports. You score a touchdown? Rest of the team grabs your ass. Get back at that guy who tackled your goalie? Team hug! ,Win the game? Wett-shirt contest for the coach! Win the championship and you're in danger of (heaven forbidl) getting kissed! Way to bear the torch of masculinity there, fellas. Of course, I'm being unfair. I'm not considering the one sport which portrays itself as the most manly sport on the face of the earth. The very bastion of all that is good and male and true: "pro" wrestling, the male soap-opera. Yes, the WWE is where it's at for manliness. Two (or more) oil-slicked guys in skin-tight spandex, tossing each other around a four-corner ring, grappling "for their lives" as they grunt and moan in front of a beerguzzling crowd of men. Now, take all of that from a foutcorner ring and move it into a fourpost bed and you've got an entirety

different sport. Instead of the carefree groping in an attempt to "kick each other's asses," they'd be - well, you get the general idea I'm sure. Now,don'tgetmewrong,fhave no problem at all with such happenings. I don't want itto stop - in fact, keep doing it! Screw those stupidly conservatist and confining bullshit rules that tell men that we have to live like we are these emotionally impotent rocks. It cannot be mentally healthy for us to continually portray ourselves as the absolute epitome of emotional control, when inside we are cracking at the seams and near-ready to go postal to escape suffocating norms. Personally, I'd much rather see these things slowly blend out into our everyday lives. Sure, so ass slapping after an exam is going a tad far, that much I'll admit. But take a look at women, you could hardly say that they suffer due to their physical contact with each other. So what really is the problem, macho jocks? For all the posturing and endless attempts to try not to do anything "feminine" or "gay," you've really failed miserably - in the sports arena, at least. Maybe you've got it wrong. Maybe it's not the big scary thing you've been told it is. You just have to loosen up a litde bit.





can't speak Mandarin, but he still wants to be your friend

Waterloo is known as a multicultural university. This factis immediately apparent to anyone with eyes. One can see the packs ofAsians, Caucasians, Blacks and Hispanics criss-crossing the campus. But there is a problem: these are packs. It is far too common to see a herd of Asian students walking together and conversing in what appears to be rapid Mandarin. It feels like there is no opportunity to join this group of friends and, more importandy, one feels as if these students don't want to allow English speaking students into their group. The fundamental advantage ofenrolling in a multicultural university is the presence ofand the ability to learn about new cultures. By hanging out in these racially specific groups students are missing the cultural integration which is an important part of the UW experience. Our beloved Federation of Students enjoys encouraging this racial segregation with clubs like the Korean Students Association and the Chinese Christian Fellowship. I'm not saying that I

don't understand the need for clubs to promote cultural leaming and cultural beliefs. I would love to see Japanese cooking or Flamenco dancing lessons. It is important to have clubs promote culture. Furthermore, there are sometimes good political reasons to have clubs - students do recognize the importance of hearing how badly the Israelis are treating the Palestinians or vice versa, depending on which club you talk to. But what important issues does the Chinese Students Association push for? Clubs that exist solely to promote friendships within one cultural group are detrimental to student life. All this does is promote racial segregatiol?-' I would like to see the CSA hold cooking lessons or Mandarin lessons - not just host big dance parties. What the Feds needs to do is promote friendships based on mutual interest rather than background. Removing these race-based clubs and focusing on encouraging interest based clubs should help solve the racial segregation problem. However, the Feds can't do everything. The drive has to come from the students who choose to speak their native tongue instead ofa1anguage .that everyone understands. Please stop walking in your herds and start making new people feel accepted in your group of friends.

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It's my new pet squid. His name is Mr. Squid.


What makes you say that?

. AAAAHt!! I don't know. JU~ this feeling I have. I

Philip Weiner

Something about Fat Days


15, which I affectionately call ''Pizza Pizza PoundMarriage misunderstood age'). Forthemostparr,however, we are comparing ourselves to what we looked like the day before. To the editor, Whenever\velookin the mirror, our perception of our bodies updates itself. A "fat day" can arrive The "Marriage defended" letter by :Mike Purvis, whenweperceiveourselvestobefatterthantheday which was printed in the January 14 Imprint, had far more "emotions and slogans" in it than in the before. Thenextthingtorernemberisthatyourpercepreferenced article theweek prior by SerenaWong. They say that 80 per cent of what you learn in If the original article could not answer the question of y~urself might be influenced by what you university is outside the classroom. I tend to agtee tion ''Who or what is attacking the traditional with this statement, But however you look at it did the night before-whetheritwas goingto the gym or that ttip to McDohald's at thtee in the definition [ofmarriage]?" itwas because she held (mside the classroom or not) we are bombarded morning. If you feel like eating late, do some the viewpoint that nobodyis attacking it, and the withinfonnationwhileatuniversity. (Before I came exercises before you go article suport~d that vfwPoint. " to UWI had absolutely tei bed (push-ups, sitPerhaps he confused writing style with emonoidea thatyoucanstick tion; the so-called slogans seemed more like supups, sex, lunges); that a light bulb in a glass of If you're really waywhen you wake up portive points to me. He should have listened to water and put it into a worried about fat his ownadvicetodomoreresearch.1hecomrnent in the morning, you microwave and it will might still feel fat beabout"intergl!1lerational partners" indicated that light up. Try it, it really days, avoid things cause you ate he paid little attention to thecontentofthe article. works~ that will negatively McDonald's, but some Ithadmadethepointthatatraditionalreligious Chances are that the marriage was pre-arranged and brides were often of that bad feeling will infonnationand experiaffect your perception be dissipated because of much younger than groonlS - almost the same ences you acquire will of yourself altogether. the workout (this is a thing that he is trying to claimteligious morals are change you as a person relative system-don't Currendy"defending" against, Theonlydifference and will definitely help gotoMcDonald'severy is thatin the olden days, itwasn't "consensual and you grow mentally. night and do lunges before bed and expect to do a loving." Since consentandlove are generallyposiRegretfully, universityisalso aplacethatwillhelp peck dance to 2001:A Space 04Jssryin a month). tivethings, thatomissionmakes traditionalheteroyou grow physically - and most likely not in the If you're reaJly worried about fat days, avoid sexualmarriageworse than the more-sinfulunions Governor Arnold way but in the FatAlbertway. things thatwillnegativelyaffectyourperception of he claims will follow gay marriage. Everybody, in some time during their univeryourself altogether -like the weight scale. Ifyou I will tty to clarify the original argument, The sity career, will look in the mirror, naked, and bone of contention is not the "traditional" aswake up weighing 1.71JOunds heavier than yesterexamine theirbodies (inmycase, I spend abouttwo day, you will look in the mirror and justify all the pect;iti~ the claim thatmarriage somehow needs minutes doingpeckdanceswhile singing the theme "defending" when there are allkindsofevidence spots on you thatlookflabbier. Also, anticipate the to 2001 :A Space OtfysSI!J). Atleastone ofthose times fat day - if you know you're going to an all-youto show thatitis notunder.attack. Mr. Purvis did when the body is examined, they will perceive address this point in his letter when he claimed !hemselves as fat Fatter than theirmentalimageof can-eat buffet in three days, work out consistendy that same-sex marriage sets a precedent forgovfora fewdays before, so thatwhenyouconquerthe how they feel they should look, at least emmentinterferencewith the church. Not only Fat days are the worst They can ruin your buffet, you won't feel so bad the next day. Ifshardtobelievethatyourbodyvnusuddenly is this a self~righteous, undemocratic view, the whole day. Even the manliest men get fat days, supporting arguments for it are flawed. and they lament about it more than girls. The key get fat after one day, relative to the day before, no matter what you do. But as long as you take control While Christianity may not have taken official is to tty and avoid them. And yes, there is a way to issuewithintertacialmarriage,asawhole, the clergy of your own perceW~ns, you'll be able t~ feellike avoid them. a million bucks in ndtime (I hope in five years you was more likely to refuse to perform interracial To me, fat days are a perception - we are see my face on a self-help video entided 'TheAtda ceremonies than to defend heterosexuals' right to comparing ourselves to what we think we should System - Beat the fat day the perception way). . marty people of any descent, Was there governlooklike. Often we compare ourselves towhen we mentintervention to enforce racial equa1itythere? were in our prime condition and that might be It seems eerily similar to the current situation. difficulttotake (especiallyinresidencewiththe frosh

)Cause and effect bunked when they are except a person's bias. I will give two examples. Drinking absinthe supposedly made people murderous; that claim has been thoroughly disproved and it is now legal in Canada. Murder rates remain suspiciously stable. Also, priests decried masturbation as bad for one's health; there are still no studies to support this, people are living longer and masturbating more than ever. Next in line for debunking: the church being forced by the government to perform marriages'. Legal marriages can be performed by certain civil servants. The government has no legal authority over church ceremony. Put those two together and you get gay marriages with no fuss. Rather than being concerned aboutgovemmentinterferenceinchurchaffairs,we shouldall beconcernedaboutchurchinterference withpersona1affaitsofpeoplewhomayfindchurch 路morals abh9tteflt, The governmentis ostensibly a democraticinstitution,responSlble for thewelfare and equality of all its citizens. Whether or hot the church is responsible for the status quo, it is evi. dendyunsatisfactory formany citizens. Essentially, Mr. Purvis was contending that a specificre1igious organization, since it previously exercised hegemonic authority over all ofsociety, should stillhave to power to restrict human rights foreveryoneelse.In anycase, I proposeacompromisetogetpasttheissueofgovemmentinterference ~ religious affairs. Lefs have a new institution to replace the hody-debated "matrimony." Let'sca1lit"fairage." It's quite simple. Fairagewill have all the legal benefits and ceremonial cachet thatmarriagecurrendyhas.Marriagevnuhaveno legal benefits and will only exist in the eyes of th~ church. 1he church can marry who theywant,but any heterosexual people who want special treatment for their relationships will have to swallow their pride and get fairied. Sounds fair to me.

- Brent Lipson 4B engineering More LETTERS, page 13

















Walking the fine line between innocent interest and creepy stalker

Dave knew the next person in the elevator would never believe him.

Years ago I was working as a wage slave, collecting carts formy localgrocery store. In the midst of this, I was approached bya couple ofgirls I knew - ~ from high school. "Hey Davenport, is [insert name ofhot guy here] working today?" they asked me. When I told them he wasn't, they turned around and went back the way they came. It was at that moment I realized thatalmosteveryoneI knowis a stalker. Okay, "stalker" is the wrong word for it. That word evokes the mental image of a guy in the bushes outside some girl's house, with his camera and telescopic lens-which isn't at allwhat


I ];~.tOO·Dxr I I



into this person only minor contrivances, within the bounds ofwhat you would "probably" do anyway? That's all okay! However, using UW Dir to find someone's e-mail address, then using said address to ask them out? CmP.JI!Notacceptable! Huge contriv-

ance! In not entirely unconnected news, have you heard of Dr. Helen Fisher? According to her researdi, there are biochemical similarities between what she defines as "romantic love" (basically when you can't get sOQ:leone out of your head) and obse§sive compulsive disorder. Another love-1¢~eP experimentwasconducted by Andreas Bartels and Semit Zeki of University College in London, England. Thepair used magnetic resonance imaging to demonsttate that the same areas ofthe brain were active when someone was "in love" as would have been if the person was abusing drugs. Conclusion: people will make minor alterations to their habits based on the person to whom they are attracted. I'm guilty of this, too. A year ago, a girl I really liked told me I should volunteer for Imprint and of course I complied. Now we're frie~ds (I think the term "just" friends would beinsultingin this context) and I'm stili here, working for Imprint. Yeah, minor alterations ...

RDlJmiU,,· i .Serenoria: -roadtrip reverie I~J~~Jatml

= I


I I I • I I I

= I· I I I I I • I


Corry Out Only ~~

• • • I I



I'm talking about. No, whatI'm talkingaboutis something everyone does, not the psychos. I'm talking about someone altering theit behaviourpattems slighdy to increase the probability they'll run into "someone." By "altering slighdy," I mean doing something you probably would have done anyway. Remember those girls I was talking about? Had that hot guy be~nworking, they would have probably decided that they were hungry and gotten something to eat from the produce department of our grocery store. Everyone gets hungry, right? I'll emphasize again, this is entirely differentfromadualstalking. Sure, you'll probably run into that person you have eyes for outside theit house, but you havenoreasontobethere,yousociopath. Consider the creepiness factor! I'm wrltingaboutthis because I still see it happening today, here, in university. You aU do it! (Ifyou don't do it, you Fertainly know several people who do). I knew of several girls who go to the Bomber hoping to run into specific gJys. It happens all the freaking time. I guess I would draw the line between this innocent "probability altering" andhonest-to-God, call-the cops "stalking" by judging how normal the action is. If that "someone" wasn't going to be at the Bomber, would you stillgo there? Are your attempts to run


746 6893 _





a. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..

Continued from page 10

Serenorla is too young to have a party system, so fundralsers like the ones or~ed by the DNC and the RNC were out. Luckily, we'd just arrived ,in Washington, D.C. (okay, Ellicott City, Maryland, but close enough) a few days before a big U.S. event, something the young country of Serenorla can emulate: inauguration! But I'd need the $40 million for the four-day party celebrating the glory thatis me (gee, parties sure have gotten expensive since I was a kid) - fortunatelythe tobacco and pharmaceutical industries (whose pending court cases and relative legislation is in no way a conflict of interest) like to pick up the bill. Theywanttocelebratemewithme and ask fornothingin exchange except . a little \lttention and access. Have I

forgotten anything? Oh, yes-I must ensure that the expense ofsecutingmy party site lands squarely on the citizens. Also important, I must make certain the parade route is stacked only with my supporters - after all, I'm only the president of my supporters, not the entire country. My opposers can have their own party - just like Bush opposers have theirs (The Washington Post, January 16, an ad read: ''Not just Republicans have balls!", ¥ N9w that the money's in place, I must find an absttact idea to declare war on. Let's see, crime, drugs and terror are already taken ... I'm going to tackle that bastard ennui. With that, Serenoria is off to a roaring start. Stay tuned.



Dilts missed the point

To the editor,

all people could do was condemn the U.S. This is a time when we should be coming together as one to help our fellow human beings rather than criticizing about money.

Despite being a "professional student," Andrew Dilts seriously missed the point of The Corpora-SaraBIand tion. Though one can look at a corporation as a 4B sociology simple tool to be used for either good or evil, what the makers of the film were trying to get for-profit a dangerous prospect across was that a corporation's model is flawed in To the editor, that it is more likelY to be used for exploitation. Further-and this is an important distinction":""" it often is. If The Corporation was meant to "prove that all The fact that something may so_metimes be corporations are and evil it would have been called «All Coporations are Heartless and beneficial must be weighed against any damage it might cause. For example, if someone is hitting Evil" I agree with Dilts, when he says anything you on the head with a hammer,ts "this hammer can be used in a good or evil way, but to suggest can also be used to build a house" an acceptable that it is wrong to criticizecorporationsis unreasonable. . excuse? I t'8 great ~t corporations are contributingto charity. Dilts says corporations often do good things; Medecins sans Frontieres does good deeds bePerhaps if there was a slightly more equal distributionofwealth (mNorthAmerica, five per cause it is purposely non-profit. The Corpomtion centofthepopulationcontrols95percentofthe deals with for-profit companies;th1s for-profit wealth), the rest ofus might also have some actual aspect is dangerous. Corporations can be a de"money-to give. Finally, equatingco!porations with structive force; the largest ones have massive scienceisdisingenuousatbest:scienceisanecessity power, curtailed only by governments. while McDonald's is not. Our government is elected, so is it wrong to Dilts questions the ethics of those filmmakers educate the public about the problems such large who profit from exposing the misdeeds of cominstitutions can cause? panies like Enron and Haliburton. W'hile there is The decision on the worth of this movie therarecaseofawealthydissenterlikethepopulist . should rest on those who see the movie, not an opinionated news columnist. . lvfichael Moore, I would venture that the little moneythesc people might make (far, far less than I don't think that Dilts wants faimess as the theCEOs ofthese corporations) is in fact secondend good, hewants it as a means to prove how the ary to their true motivation: a desire to do good. things he believes can have value. I thinkcorpo. DoesDiltsreallyconsideranysupposed "evils" rations can do great things and genetally people e1l.-pect them to . ofthis movie? which one could simply choose not m~ptt~~Vifdtttnj)W'~orehild" ••.•. Tchat"is~<hf~.i$ootrage·~dutiesjte

imetein infu~people

of th~e misdeeds? Dilts defends corporations because doctors keep hirbody healthy, he~ able to coi:nn\~te with tecbnologt mId "these are all things that peopl~worlring together in corporations, have brought to me," As longasDiltsisokay,what'salittleextratOxic \VJlSte in our environment? Corporations control many aspects ofour lives and gain more control daily. Abuses like those by Enron, Haliburton and Nike tell us we should not be lax in our dealidgs with them. Should we teally believe we are "uneducated" or demonstrate a "pooruse oflogic" in watching TheCorpomtionand keeping an eye on these corporations?

- ]amIJS AofiAfartin 2B english / east asia,n studies Stop attacking the U.S.

To the editor, When thetsunamihappenedmanypeoplearound the globe probably shated my feelings of shock anddisbelief. However,whilemanyoftheworld's citizens were grieving for the victims and making" donations, others were voicingtheirdisgracewith who else but the United States and its government. People were criticizing them by sayingtheir initial contribution oU15 million to the Tsunami RwefFund was inadequate. Inthetsunamidisasteratleastl50,OOOpeople lost thC!ir lives, many o1Jlers are missing and thousands more have been left homeless. Yet it is the United States and the Bush administration th~t have received the undeserved attention. People seem to forget that at firstnobody knew the~tude of destruction that the earthquake had caused or that when the devastation was realized the U.S. increased their contribution to $350 million. When the U.S. did increase the contribution, theywere criticized in the media as it was regarded as being due to political pressure. Ovetahundred.thoU$andpeople are dead and



all this money from students, operate with only volunteers and ask speakers to volunteer as well.

- Kevin Redmond 3B hollOtlf'S scjena

Tsunami not the only crisis

To the editor, In his article in last week's edition of Imprint, Clubs Director Theis was right to praise Waterloo students for their outstanding efforts towards raising awareness and aid for tsunami relief. As a Waterloo studentmyselfI feel a sense of pride when' I see fellow members of the student body taking action when faced with the suffering of others. However,likeusual,thepridelfeelisfollowed byaliti:l.evoiceinmyheadthatwhispersawarning and a plea. The warning is against allowing the aftermathofinstantaneoustragedytooversbadow

be receiving a ~eat deal of support, I hope that continues. TheCongoandotherongo~gslowlyworsen­

ingtragedies around the world are ignored and we . should not underestimate the impact that can be made bya dedicated group ofuniversity students coming from many different backgrounds, with ties to many different (;ommunities and living in one of the worlds richest countries. Please build on what has been started, and most importantly prove Theis right.

- DavidMantkJ!(JS 3B math/economics Oral sex advice helpful

Thank you toJulia Harries for venturing into the

almost-taboo world ofcircumcision. Thecharacteristics between cut versus uncut dicks and oral sex specifics have been quietly talked about between girlfriends, gay men, or sisters for ages, but thevariousongoingcrises thatareignorecl because rarely do we get to see some$ng in print about the differences that us men have among each the effectsare stretched over time. other. InCongoforexarnpleanestimated3.8million Although I ammale and happil.v circumcized, people have perished over the past si'{ years with I enjoyed the article for the simple fact that it an additional 31 ,000 civilians dying every month. Thatis the equivalent ofa Southeasti\sia tsunami '. addresses the subject matter while givinggirls (and style disaster every five months and itstillremains homose.'Ulal boys) helpful tips in the" bedroom relativelyignored. u.ithout introdu<;ing the teligious or cultural asNow for the plea. Please allow this incred- . pects ofcircumcision. ible example of cooperation and effort to Boys and girls allhave their sexualpreferences continue. Make the response by the student butno one seems to be willing to talk about male body not a one-time event but a connnuous penises, until now. action. The media ri~~'cQ~the t5unaimi extensively and the victims seem to - AnfJ1!Ymous


·"·f~~~~ ..7'.~-~~~~~~~~J;:~~~~~~~~~~J;:~".

Movies like The CopomtUm are necessary: the terrible things that corporations do must be brought to light in order to prevent repeat of-



- Mike Little 2B religious stttdies

!00 P1Gt thnt car; do MC§a· In kl$$ time, t00 OCE CUiiiom }'tJ ItmM"d "'" thci . 'I'if!h tIT Tecltncl0JlW.

WPIRG wastes our money! :[0

the editor,

The January 14, 2005 issue ofInprinthad a full··' page, spaci~us advertisement made by Waterloo Public Interest Research Group. This full page advertisement had a price tag of$819. That's $819 of poorly spent student money. At $4.75 per student, per term, the student fees of 173 students would have been required to pay for this ad. Backin the finalissueoflasttertn, WPIRG had a similar full-page ad, that's $1,638 of student's money so farthis academic year. Now WPIRG likes to advertise its worth, buthoware these large adS tellingstudents that their money is beingput good use? This advertisement is for a talk onJanuary 26 byDavidSuzuki,butthereisacostof$6forentty. How is it that "when an organization that is supportedbystudentfundinghasaspeakercome there is a cost, but when a poorly funded club or group on campus invites a guest speaker to speak there usually isn't a fee? Somenotable guests in the past fewyears hayC beenJackLayton,Preston1fanningand the CEO o'f the TSX, all free of charge. CCC is putting on a talk later this month for only $2 per entty and UWSFL put on a ~last term free of charge.



talks can function quite fine without collecting money on' students' tuition billS,.why is it that WPIRG must collect so mu~h money to do so? Maybe it Should take a lessot\fiom the clubs and groups on campuS thatdon'tneed toconect .

Powerful rnuItitaskIIIg can mean signlfII;ant • productMty gains for your organi2at1on. The lntel' PGntiurn"4 ~r featuring HT Technology ena adlng of ba/ldWldth ~sive the desktop to security e. Choose the tool that am give you a competitive edge. with the Inter Pentiu~ 4 processor featuring lIT Technology.


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Car: speed limits don't help bad drivers Continued from page 9 Perhaps those in power felt that we should enforce speed limits because some accidents involve fast-moving cars. Indeed, this logic could be applied to other areas of life. I can see the headlines now:

Authorities ban pillows, sleeping after husband s/~ffocates snooifng wife Imposinglimitson traffic speed near residential zones, pedestrian areas and other sensitive spots makes perfect sense.

But on main streets and highways, trafficlargelyis self-regulating. Its speed is proportional to visibility, volume and road \vidth. Traffic moves slowly in a sno\vstormona small road and quickly on a sunny three-lane highway. The speed risk factor has to do\vith relative rather than absolute measurements - i.e. moving faster or slower than the vehicles around you - combined with driver error and general disrespectful behaviour on the road. Traveling faster than artificial, absolute speed limits is hardly the root cause ofaccidents and, as such, should not be the focus of safe driving enforcement. Yet because it generates so much tax revenue and masks the real issues, it is. Rather than explain things that respectful people do - choose safe speeds, not tailgate and so on -we need to teach motorists how to berespectful. One gentleman I sa\\' frying to sp~ his car on the ice in an intersection was definitely not being respectful, even if he was traveling below the speed limit. Another one who approached me from behind on the 401, tailgated in anger for about five seconds, swerved out into the left lane and then zoomed away like the Batmobile while leaving: me with an impression of his median digit - was also disrespectful. I once visited a town in the southern u.s. that had a law requiring traffic to stOp-not slow ?own but stop-

if there was a pedestrian who stepped up to the curb 'to cross. This applied not only at intersections' and crosswalks, but anywhere. :Motorists obeyed this law without the threatofpolice enforcement When my family and I wanted to cross a

street, traffic would bow to us as though we were kings. On the road, we gave the same respect to other pedestrians. Wow. A law that encourages drivers to be safe and respectful without encodingitin the idea of"drive slowly


I was embaff1l.>ed and disgIlSl¢d.

I wa$ so $/1<).:1.:.:11 all J c.,ul<l do was jlllll sir tbere and watch it the wll,)le way through. I \VatU my mOlley back.

00.:_ .1 11m totally, without qU41:llWo, 100'11, btlterOlil'xwl'



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What the heck going on? WhY IslRnls QIIIId 18 co• ." -pap 17

Waterloo's brand new art of fashion Shauna Solomon IMPRINT STAFF

Last Friday, Loop Clothing officially kicked offwith a grand opening, PUBLIC comm_UNITY launch party. Founded by former Laurier student Alnoor Keshvani, the store offers much more than just clothing: it is an "experience" that includes a combination of art, music and clothing. LocaredinsidethenewPrincessTwin cinema building, one immediately noticestheuniquenessofthestore, with the ~ed beats conlingfrom the tum~lounge chairs, a friendly attnos~md Plrgbqys in the fitting rooms. Obviously, Loop's clothingis one of itsmajordtaws. The store features clothingfrommanyindependentlabels, such as Tribal Streetwear, Dagg and Stacey, FreshJive and Mucha cha, among others. Plus, 90 per cent of the women's wear is made by Canadian labels. Andforaslightlymoredistinctfashion experience, beginninginlate February or early March, in-house designers willbe available to assist and re-work old clothing based upon ideas from the customer and from the store's staff. Once a des.ign, material and print are chosen;tltceustDmercanleavelldcposit ~d few days to pick ~ theirone0Qf-a-kind piece. ,~Butpeopleare1ikelytobedtawninto ' p1ace,n~ life meets style" f~r reasons otherthaO. clothing. Theurbanindustrial art gallery displays and sells paintings, sculptures, prints andgraffiti



fromlocalandintemationalartists.Also functioning as a lounge on Thursday throughSaturday,thestorewillpresent localmusicians,DJs, art shows andspoken word poets. ''The goal here is to build a support sttucture forartists at the grassroots level so they can evolve to a higher level," says Keshvani. Any artist interested in presenting their work is encouraged to visit and chat. Keshvanitnaintains thattheinspitation for this unique store came from trave11ingaround Canada, as wellas visiting North America's fashion capital; New York City. Vancouver was also a huge inspiration, and it was initially the city in whichKeshvani wanted to open his store. But his old university town called to him-and provided the space and money to establish the store. To put his idea into action, Keshvanireceived a start-uploanof$10,OOOfromapartnership between the Canadian YouthBusiness Foundatiop and the Lutherwood community services agency. He is the first recipient of this type ofloan. As quoted in the Waterloo Chronicle, Keshvani says, ''1 hope I can have such a store that will create such an amazing experiencethatIcangivetheclothesaway for free and just charge people for the ~" Sottyou_ttDtap'4OiiQ¥, '" thecultuIalsceneinWarerloo,~just want to have something to do, head downtown,toLoop Clot:l:]ing and geta gijmpseatsomeonewhowasabletoput his ideas into action. Mallrats excluded. Fll.IP\IUKEVIC

OJs? Custom fashion? Graffiti? What kind of crazy clothing store is Alnoor Keshvani running?

Sponsorship be damned

The sport of competitive gaming has been gaining momentum along with the growth of the industry. In fact, G4TechTV's televised celebration of the sport, Arena, has higher ratings than NHL games from the current season. But seriously, watching peopie play games well is very interesting, and watching girls kick the shit out of sissy 1337 ~speaking loserS is kind of, well, hot. But in all seriousness, the competitive gaming world has received an injection of media coverage from the introduction of the FragDolls. This super-sexy (and super-skilled) all-girl team has been kicking ass and taking titles all over the gaming world. The real eyebrow raiser is their sponsor: Ubisoft. At first, I saw this as a bad thing. Those sneaky, underhanded bastards at Ubisoft were trying to sell more games by making me think that if I bought more Ubisoft stuff, maybe I'd 4

chicks. I mean, they're all great looking, and there's no mention of any of the girls being attached. But then I made a firm decision to stop drinking before 9 a.m., and grew slightly more sane. Sure, the girls function as a sort of marketing tactic, but for themost part they perform their honest function. They let girls know that not only is it okay forthemto be gamers, it's also okay for them to beat the hell outofguygamers with energy swords. There are naysayers and tt;olls flr,: ing all around theIntetnet frothingar their virtual mouths. Some of the more intelligent (but unenlightenea) ones see the FragDolls as a sneaky marketing ploy, while the usual challenges were put forth by, the highvoiced skinny pre-pubescent gamers. The girls have received a fair amount of negative press and pressure for both their Ubisoft affiliation and the simple fact that they're girls: The other factor that contributes to my high opinion of the team is, in fact, the contentious issue qf their sponsor. Ubisoft is one of the most well-respected and talented publishers in the industry. They brought us Prince ofPersia, for shit's sake. And, at least it's not EA. God knows what

pretty girls make garners

they'd do with the power of a female gaming team. In terms of the mainstream aspect, gaming definitely needs more girls. While guys are relatively satisfied with the current state ofgaming, it's generally not sitting well with women. I think that the excellent example put forth by the FragDolls will inject the consumer base of gaming with many

more women, and hopefully this will shift things ali¢e bit. The input of a woman, speaking from experience, tends to be somewhat more valuable than a man. Likewhen my roommate told me it was probably a bad idea to see, just how flammable the bag of cotton St1owwehadleftoverwas. She wastotaIly right and now I have no "


But I digress. This sort of promotion certainly has a great deal to offer the gaming industry. Not only will it increase their target audience, but it brings gaming further out into the realm of mainstream entertainment. Wt; now have something very close to celebrities. ,





The Princess gives birth to twins Filip VukceVie IMPRINT STAFF

The buildingispackedwithpeople busily engagedinconversation.Livejazzmusic drifts in from all around. There's a palpable air of excitement to the evening. Andforonenightonly,there'salltheftee dtink,foodandbestofall,popcotn,you could ever want Downtown Waterloo's Princess Twin is now officially open for business. . Whilethetheaterhas been screening filmssinceDecemberl,thispastFriday was theofficialgmndopening. The missionstatementofthePrincessTwinisto offer the Kitcbener-Waterloo region a morerefined,artisticchoicein thetypes offihnsavailabletothecommunity.The Twin will focus on more commercial· .~t ones ¢tat still have some dCl:n:letit,· while the originalPriticess. wiI~ttate on screening foreign ~ art films and movies that are generally not available at large multiplexes. Thenewbuilding, which nouses the Princess Twin, is a multi-tenant structure. In addition to the Twin, you ean browse through GalleryIndigina, a na-

tiveCatladianattspecialtystoreandLoop Oothing,a ttendyclothingstore. There isalsoanotherspaceinwhichayet-to-beannounced shop will soon take up residence. John Tutt, owner of both Princess theaters hints, «something is also

going in next door, butl ean't saywbat it is yet - something food rdated." The evening began with an open house where visitors could admire the various art pieces on display, listen to a group of native drummers perform, partakein conversation or simply enjoy the atmosphere. Therewascertainlyno riskofrunningQUtofpeopJewithwhom to startadiscussion. Accordingto Tutt, ''In total, we've gotmaybe two or three hundred people. There are advertisers, local press, regular patrons and film distributors." Each of the two new cinemas contain wonderful stadium seating with soft upholstery and armrest cup hold~ ers. In addition, both of the cinema's screens are a good deal1arger than the Princess Original's, andthe new facility bOasts animpressivesurround-sound· system.Allofthls, wtappedin a stylish lookand modem feel, gives the Prineess Twin a unique and distinguished atmosphere. To cap offthe eveningtherewetetwo filmscreeningsheldin thenewlyopened theatre. One screen showed tbeAsian hit:, HOIISC qf FIJiwg Daggers, while the other playedKevin Spacey's latest, Be-

yomJ the Sea. Priortothescreenings,.theex:c::itedtheatre owner stood before the audience and gavea speech. The pride he holds for his business shone through during his talk. ''Ibis projettisnotunlikeafilm because,


the oAIy time you'Bsee these chairs empty at the new Princess Twin.

fromdievery~therehavebeen so many people involved in making it'sbeena~ ;~lhank.Whetber it:'s~designetS,finanee.ts,press,'~

he pauses. <Candwhocarr fotget the conimunity atlatgewhich has supportedtbis type offilm ptogtw:nming- hats offto all ofthosepeop1e. "rheKitchener-Waterloocommu-

nity supports foreign.language films, Canadian cinema, and specialty-programming. Ofthe s.ize that Kitchener-

Waterloois, thePrlncessCinemastancls out We stand on par With the Toronto's and Ottawa's in terms of the number of people that come out and see foreign language films. Wereallydo have a special thing going on here: community supports programming,

therefore programming gets more adventurous, and the wheel keeps turning," he smiled. ''It's great" The crowd applauded. The lights wentdown.And the first official screening was held at the Princess Twin Cinemas-the first ofwhat is sure to be many. ., ' ,ii" ..

Mixtape M'adtless





WhenilSkedififs hard to be a "woman inrock,"'NekoCase, Canada's favouriteadopted Arneriean chanteuse, answers, ('1 can only cite two things that make it diffiClllt-::- one, repeatedly being asked that question; and tWo, findinga clean toilet seatinadirtyrock club." Celebrating the "so-wbat-if~ I'm-a-woman-I-JUST-WANNAPLAY' attitude, here is your weekly mixtape.

eoming £ollie. K-l,)ubl1k afraid. be

very, very afraid. w,-w:operieats;ca Patti Smith- Birdland Bewildered, outcast youth, look no further! The unrelenting,spirired godmotherofpunkandspokenword is here to save the day! "Birdland" is a beautifulStoty thatreckonswith death, religion, the bellyofashipand araven. An epic of a song, b~t a hell of a


Prayer Prepareyourse.lf, you pansies: you're about to be assaulted. Equipped with multi-octaved pipes and diesel-powered lungs, experimentalist wonder Galas gives the senses a rude awakeningwith this five-minute blastofshock


Mother FuckingAsshole About to plunge headfirst into the limelight:. .Martha and her songs lean toward folky ditties (to be expected, just look at her lineage) and harken back to the days ofPatsy Oine, but with more cursing. Unique, raspy vocals emote the heartbroken protagonist ofthis tune and the others on her new eponymous EP. It's folk with a bitter, cheeky twist.


M.I.A. W /Diplo"":"'Galang She doesn't necessarily make rock music, but M.I.A. still rocks more house than a nomadic neanderthal. (Did that joke even make sense?) Both squishy and crunchy beats abound in this addictivedan~goodness,and Sri Lanka's l'\delivers lyrics like nobody's businesl. Expect gre~t things, my


The Soft Pink Truth -;-Make Up After a stringofdisappointments,

This righteous babe has·still go'tt!

ourproutgonist{MigsBJevinBlectum) . decides that she won't let herselfgo unsatisfied again. Shegets allg\lSSred· up for her boy, fixing her hair and make-Up and hopin~ that her efforts won't be wasted this time. At the end of the night:. the soft pink missy puts her foot down: "Smoke a cigarette? I'm not ready yet!" A dominating glitch-dance track for frustrated girls everywhere.

Martha Wainwright -

PJHarvey-Whothe It's almost like Polly jean's talkingdirectlyto those very journalists: "Who the fuck / do you think you are? / Get out / of my hairl" Never one to flounder under hot lights, PJ delivers a short, sassy and solid rock tune to thrilled boys and girls alike. ~d, despite her size, she can most certainly hold her own among the ranks of rock's badass boys (see: Mark Lanegan, Josh Homme, Nick Cave, etc.), thank you very much.

from the ladies

Neko Case- Deep Red Bells A haunting song about murder on the interstate, "Deep Red Bells" mourns the loss of a young woman who died at rlJe hands of a man, possibly herlover. Forgotten, her soul "casts aboutlike an old paper bag. past empty lots and early graves." More country than Martha but usually just ascheeky,Nek9 has siren pipes thatare as clear and strong as those deep red bells.

Technic:cilly,I'malwaysimpressedby 'Ani's perfonnanceonheralburris. Her guitar work is raw and drips with attitude, while her singing bubbles with personality, passion and sensitivity. DiFranco is joined by a host oftalented musicians that add a whole other dimension to the music. Some songs, like ''Studying Stones" in particular, would sound empty without the violin and pianopatt Thereisan obviouschemistry betweenAniand~ backup, which

Ani DiFranco


Knuckle Down

but also an extra layer of humanity. On an intellect:uallevel, it is very worthwhile to pay attention to Ani's lyrics. She embraces apersonalhoriesty that most songwriters watch from a distance.Shelaysherselfbarewithlyrics that make Sarah McLachlan look like Avril Lavigne. This album was largely whimsicalandretrospective, withasubtle sense of humour, even through the more serious nwnbers. She isn't overly dramatic, just strikingly human. The only criticism I have of this disc is that at times the music is too busy, with superfluously complicated mel~ dies that don't really seem to go anywhere. Occasionally,shewalksafineline between beingbeaurlfullyunhingedand simply confusing, butitrarelycomes up. Despite my praises, I wouldn't recommend this album for everyone. If you're looking for a pop princess or brooding heavy rock, look elsewhere. ButifyoulikeJoni1tfitchell, with a taste oftheBarenalredLadies' Gordonoranyof AniDifranco's previous albums, thenI highly suggest knuckling down to your local CD store to check it out.


The self-proclaimed righteous babe is back with her 17th full-length album, and she certainly hasn't run outofideas. I'm always wary of any Ani Difranco album, as I have a history ofbecoming completely and utterly absorbed by her unique blend of folk, jazz and rock - I recently finished a long dance with her 2001 doublereleaseRew~amJReckon­ ill!, With each release, I fall in love with this woman again and again. lVtucle.k Downis no exception. This is not a pop album; it took some patience to appreciate its more subtle qualities, but it is certainlyworth a secondlisten. The title trackopens the albumwithsomekick-you-in-the-face, straight-up rock and roll featuring Difranco's signature quirkyvocal style. From there the album moves thematically towards a mellower, mean style. Songs range in colour from the sparse, hauntingiyaccompanied ''Minerva,'' to the catchy, upbeat "Manhole," to the dark, grave "Callous." She takes you dancing a waltz to being in a reflective trance and all things in between.

Darren Hutz



In good and bad company lauren Fox and Christine Loureiro IMPRINT STAFF

\Vhenwewere hangingouton Saturday, we realized thatwe had both just seenln Good Compaf!Ythe night before. We had such different opinions ofit, we decided itwouldbeinterestingtowritea "thumbs up, thumbs down" -type review. Hereis the way Lauren saw it: Having seen the previews for this movie, I went in hoping for a funny chick flick. Itwasentertaining,andthere were a few good lines, but I wasn't expecting it to be a comedy. I was, however, expectingyourtypicalromantic chick flick with a happy ending. That didn't happen. I heard once that the majority of scenes in '\vomen's films" happen at home, and "men's ftlms" happen at work. Considering that the majority of this film was set at work, crossing this genre stereotype must have confused my expectations. I thought it was going to be aromance-y film, butitwas based

more on the father-son relationship between Dan Foreman (Dennis Quaid) and Carter Duryea (fopher Grace). In the end, Carter learns a valuable lesson ~ he'd rather be happy than successful. So he winds up \vith no job and no girlfriend. I also leamed a valuable lesson: I shouldn't go into movies with preconceived notions, because when I do, the movie is never as good as I built it up to bein my mind. I think the thing that got me most excited about this movie was the use of Peter Gabriel's song "Salsbury Hill" in the trailer. But that's about it. Here is the way Christine saw it: This film could still be chick flick given the nature of the relationship between Grace and Quaid's characters. Really, I couldn't see throngs of men appreciating the nature of this fatherson relationship as it developed and both Dan and Cartergrewtoappreciate each other's business and life skills,

But where this movie's strength really lies is in mixingcurrent,real world situations (e.g., corporate takeovers) and talented stars that appeal to broad demographics, with the usual movie fantasy scenarios (really,havinga habyat 51 after being demoted, while your 18year-old daughter moves to New York City and starts dating your boss-not so common). Topher Grace is a talented comedic actor while Dennis Quaid has certainly proven his chops in the dramaticworld. But their strengths in In Good Compaf!Y are reversed: Quaid's character Dan delivers one-liners about Carter's Starbucks addictioClj while Grace portrays an ambitious, young exec who clearly doesn't want to be where he is, but doesn't know where else to go. Marg Helgenberger of CSI and ScarletrJ ohannson do wellin their supporting roles. The pregnancy storyline was a bit much and definitelyunneeded although it added depth to Dan's family life. I also have to agree with Lauren:

Is Hollywood scared of girls or are girls scared of Hollywood?

So I was watching the Golden Globes the other night when I thought of something I hadn't considered before - when did award shows turn into giant thank-fests? I understand why you'd want to thank people who have helped you and people who have inspired you, but there is a point where enough is enough. Wouldn't it be more mean~ng­ ful to thank some people in private, when you have time to actually speak with them, instead of quickly reading their names off to an audience of millions who watch with confused looks on their faces? It made me yearn for the days of Marlon Brando's crazy acceptance antics, or more recently, the flag-waving of Michael Moore. At least we had Jaime Foxx and Robin Williams to add some pizzazz to the evening. The night wore on and we got to hear countless agents, producers and managers, none of whom anybody knows, thanked. Then the "Best Director" nominees were announced, and I thought yet another thing I hadn't thought before: \'(1ait a sec, where the hell are the women? Think about it. Can you name a single female movie director? I spend all my time chindeep in movies, and aside from Sofia Coppola, even I'm hardpressed to come up with even a short-list. We've got actresses, designers, producers and some writers who are women, but when you try to come

up with directors, it's far too easy to draw a blank. When you look back at the industry historically, the gap becomes even more noticeable.-It's very odd, sort of like, oh I don't know, I'll pull something completely unrelated out of the air here: it's sort of like writing a "video game" related column, yet refusing to play computergames, which everyone knows easily make up at least half the industry in terms of signifi-

Maybe if we had more female writers and directors, we would get more realistic portrayals of wom!!n, or at least a stronger drive to tone down the eye-candy_ cance. They're both bloody insane. Anyway, back to female directors. What's the deal? I refuse to believe that women don't have what it takes to be directors - that being madness -:- so there's got to be some other reason. Is it perhaps that there are some old Hollywood taboos that are still in place? Probably not, since while modern Hollywood is considered to be many things, sexist isn't high on, the list. Is it that they just aren't interested in it? No, I don't think it's even possible to sayan entire sex isn't "interested" in something. So, what could it be then?

In trying to solve this puzzle, I decided to turn to television, a similar industry. Once a~ain there are few female directors, but there are a good deal of women in much higher creative positions. Whether they be staff writers, producers, or even showrunners, there is no lack of high-ranking women in TV -land, so why aren't things the same in Tinseltown? Maybe if we had more female writers and directors, we would get more realistic portrayals of women, or at least a stronger drive to tone down the eye-candy. Don't get me wrong, I love Kill Bills Uma, and female superheroes are pretty cool, but when are we going to get some fllms with female protagonists that aren't just love interests or plot devices? I don't see a single reason why something like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind could not have been told with Kate Winslet as the main character. I realize I'm making it sound like there are no female-oriented fllms out there, and that isn't the case, but I do feel that they are the minority. 1'd like to believe that sometime in the near future, as the female talent in television gets more and more recognized, we'll get more female directors if for no other reason than to shake-up what has traditionally been a male-dominated industry. Imagine, chick flicks directed by actual chicks. Female action movies made by females. Stories about everyday women told by everyday women. I'm sure that one day we'll all be enjoying the works of Stephanie Spielberg - that's certainly a Hollywood I would like to see.


Topher Grace gets himself in yet another sticky situation. great soundtrack, featuring Damien Rice's "Cannonball" and a great wardrobe to boot (go Scarlett). In Good Compaf!Ywasn't full of life lessons or sidesplitting humour, but it was a sweet, enjoyable story about a group of people simply learning what

is impottantto them. Talented actors, purposefully cheesy scenes and funny fish-out-of-water moments made this film a nice, light Friday-night flick.

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ey, at least she's experienced

Marianne Faithful! Before The Poison Anti

Simply put, Marianne Faithfull is a legend. Her name conjures up images of the swingiog '60s heyday, where having promiscuous sex with

most of the Rolling Stones and titking enough drugs to paralyze an elephant was part of her celebrity appeal. Thankfully, Faithfull was smart enough to wake up from her druginduced daze and launch a successful musicalcareer, worlcingwith such contemporaries as Jarvis Cocker, Beck and Billy Corgan on her last albUm Killing Time. With the release of her 12th album Bqore the Poison, Faithfull focused on working with other artists such as P J. Harvey, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, and Damon Album, artists that elegandy helped compliment her unique vocal delivery-. Although she's not the greatest vocalist, Faithfull manages to embody a sensual spirit that clearly show-

cases her greatest strength - a tone that evokes a deep emotional sensation. It's Harvey's lyrical and musical contribution that makes this album stand out (in fact, it's all of these songs which lead me to believe they're Uh Huh Hercast-offs). On Before the Poison, Harvey lends her talents to half of the album - which I realized was a good thing after hearing the remaining five tracks. Songs such as the opening track "The Mystery- Of Love" and "My Friends Have" use Harvey's distinct sound, while Faithfull craftiJ.y incorporates her gravely, hoarse vocals for effect. "No Child of Mine," a track also present on Harvey's aforementioned Uh Huh Her, is the stand-out

track on Before the Poison. It's constant refrain, "I have no time for hate or love/Hey child, you're so full ofwoe/ I have no time for hate or lying/Hey child, you're no child of mine," gives instant sincerity when coming from Faithfull, moreso than Harvey could ever pull off. Unfortunately, the rest of the album disappoints, and, to a certain degree, annoys me. A perfect example would be "Deperanto" - the worst song I've heard all year. It's incredibly hard to describe without actually listening to it yourself Faithfull tries to do this rap thing that's accompanied by an incredibly cheesy bass line and occasional screech , of a sax. After several listens of the song, I actually decided to launch a

jihad on this album - which I later rescinded once my conscience had talked me out of it. Other forgettable tracks include the drawling"CrazyLove," andtheirrelevent "There Is a Ghost" .Maybe next time Faithfull can justget Harvey towtite her nWkalbum; thatway, I'dgive the album more than a couple of spins. Sadly, I wouldn't recommend this album for the casual buyer; it lacks the punch that other artists in her genre have. However, fiber-fans of P.J. Harvey and Nick Cave should swallow up Faithfull's latest contribution to her storied career and pray that Faithfull works with Harvey one moretime before she kicks the bucket. Dave George-Cosh

Oh, they took your momma out DaveGeorge~osh



The Scissor Sisters are on top of their game. After releasingtheir self-titled debutlastyear, the bandwasrewardedwith critical accolades, butmore importandy they now hold the distinction of being UK's highestsel1ingactof2004.Notan


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Robbie Williams. Last Monday brought their eclectic and high energy show the Sisrers are becoming known for to Toronto's GuvernmentAfterwitnessingtheirCanadian debut at Lee's Palace earlier last year, I knew that I was going to get my money'sworth, whichiswhy Ibravedthe cold and trekked on down to Toronto. LocalbandTheFuzzplayedtheirrole as openers perfectly by providing a set withasurprisinglygoodstartfollowed by relativelypoppy-ciancey cheese filler for their remaining 40 minutes. Eventually, the crowd swelled towards the stage, slighdy buzzed from their $7 drinks, in anticipation ofwhatwas to come. Scissor Sisters hit the stage and immediatelyjumpedinto''Launt,'' the second single from their album. ''Tits on the Radio" followed and the night's energy reached its peak and lasted until the very end. Between each song, singers Ana Mattonic andJake Shears provided entertainingreparteewiththeaudienceand themselves. l'vfattonic even ventured onto a soapbox defending her tight to wear fur, commenting that, "I'm for dead animal tights. If the animal died before I was born, it's alright to wear." The band played the entire album,as well as some new songs added to beef the setlistup. The night's highlight was providedduringtheencoreofacoverof Franz Ferdinand's ubiquitous single, ''Take Me Out" The Scissor Sisters gaveit theirall for the Toronto crowd and the crowd gave ittightbacktothe band Foragreatnight offun rock and roll,make sure you don't miss the next time this band come around these parts.

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Your housing questions answered Andrew Dilts IMPRINT STAFF

Fartoo often, university students are put at a disadvantage when it comes torenting rooms and apartments. Fledglings in the world of tenancy, they come up against seasoned veterans ofthe field landlords-andcanencounternoshortageofttoubles. Herearea fewthings that students may wish to know before signing a lease: Ontario's TenantProtectionAct If you rent within the province of ()ntario, both you and your landlord are governed by the rules laid out in this province's Tenant Protection Act (TP A). From eviction notices to maintenance and repairs, the act covers a \vide range of subjects important to landlords and tenants alike. The complete TP A is freely available on-line, as is a more downto-earth guide produced by the Ontario Rental Housing Tribunal (ORHT), the official body charged with enforcing the TPA. Unfortunately, too few of the landlords responsible for student dwellings in the waterloo area seem to be familiar with the contents ofthe TPA. Students can be equally una\\'"arC of their rights protectedbytheact,adefidtwhichcanbe cosdy. Hereareafewoftheusualbones of contention: When the lease and the TPA disagree A lease is a written agreement between landlord and tenant. However, this agreement is never more powerful than the law - thelaw,in this case, being

the TPA. Whethermalevolendyorunwittingly,manyleasesincludeimproper sections into their leases that are not in accordance\vith the law. When this happens, that unlawfulsection ofthe lease is wrong, as clearly stated in the TPA. Thus, ifyour landlord is flailing about, waving and pointing his or her finger at something inyourlease,butthatsectiongoesagainst the act, you are not bound bythatpartof yourlease. (No,aconflictdoesnotnullify the entire lease, only the section that conttadicts the act.) Nopets? Noway! A prime example of a lease/ TPAconilictipvolves the "no pets" . clause that appears in many leases,whichgoesagainstaclausein theTPA. Thus, in the province of Ontatio, a landlord cannot stop a tenant from keeping a pet in the house, unless that pet is inherendy dangerous, causes unduedamageort:riggersaller- _t-_-..;II'I gic reactions in fellow tenants. No tigers, please. Damagedeposit ... Another example of a lease/ TPA conflict issue is that of damagedeposits.Themostalandlordcanask forinter.tnsofadamagedepositisthelast month's rent, payable before the tenant occupiesaunit.Landlordsmayaskforno more than that amount. Also, on the subject of damage deposits: tenants are notrequired to submit post-dated cheques to alandlordforeach month oftheir tenancy, with the exceptionofthelastmonth'srentmentioned above. Still, many tenants do so anyway 0

as a sign of goOd faith - that decision is up to you. Additionalcharges Snow shovelling, garbage cleanup, stairwell or pool maintenance- if it's not direcdyinside your unit, your landlord is responsible for taking care 0/it and under most circumstances thq can Ilot

unexpected and unannounced. Unless thereissomesortofemergency(e.g,your houseisonfire),orunlessyourtenancyis about to expire, the landlord needs to provide you with written notice no less than 24 hours before he or she is to enter your unit. When things go wrong Rent a bit too tight last month? Iffor chafgt!YOII for !!Jmlltmalt!? This,uh, 'fiiend' ofminerecendyhad whateverreasonyourrentchequebounces, the most a landlord can charge is a $20 alandlordattetnpttochargehimandhis administtative fee, plus the amount their fellow hO':JSetnates $50 bank charges them as an NSF (notsuffieach for every time was dent funds) charge. \'\'hilea landlord can evictyouforregularlynotpayingrent, they can not threaten eviction for not paying this NSF fee. Breathingspace Being threatened with eviction? You may have time to set things straight. Landlords have to provide 14 days' notice to tenants before an eviction takeseffect.Duringthistime, thereare a number of problems that can be ~ ~ rectified, nullifying the eviction notice. Late rent can be paid .... Damage can be repaired. That 'ex:tta tenant' that you've been hidingcanbemovedoutorcan make an agreernentwithalandlord to sign shoveledorgarbagewascleanedup. ''It's onto the lease. Anyofthesesolutionswill stop the eviction from taking place. in my lease," said Mr. landlord My Ummm, I have aprob1em... 'fiiend' called the Ontatio Rental and Luckily, there is somewhere you can Housing Tribunal, and confirmed that the landlord was 'wrong. A few firm tum to if you've been having a serious reminders of the law later, requests for . problem \vith your landlord The OntatioRentalHousingTribunalis thereto more money stopped coming. That'swrittennotice, thankyou enforce your rights, and can provide me"I've beentoldstories by fiiends who diationorarbittation servicesifnecessary. ' Contact information is below. wakeupearlySaturdaymomingstofind theirlandlordsittingin theirlivingroom, Something to avoid

Tenantsin Ontario are not allowed to withholdrentfrom theirlandlord landlord not fixingthatleaky sink,notinstallingthat extta bathroom that they promised you before you moved in? You can flO/ stop payment on a cheque or otherwise withhold rent money from them. One final note In peace and conflict studies class, I was taught that "the language of rights is the language of no compromise." In other words, if you have a problem with your landlord or your lease,pointingandwavingtheTPAin thelandlord's face may not be the best solution. You more likely want to try to talk to them informally, letting them know ofyour needs andconcems, and see what compromises can be reached between the two of you. If a problem still exists, a gentle reminder of your rights in the TPA might help ease the problem -much more pleasant than scutding any goodwill in the relationship that the two ofyou will be sharing for as long as you are a tenant . Still need help? Still, some situations dictate that you go right to the top. Guidelines for the ORHT ( along with an up-to-date version of the Tenant Protection Act in its entirety(, can be found online. The Tribunal runs a free helpline during regular business hours if you have any further questions just call 1-888-332-3234 between 8:30 a.m. and 5 p.m., Monday to Friday.

The investigation commences Part three of a chilling tale of murde~ and mystery

l\fichael spent a few days in his room recovering from the shock of seeing a body that was so brutally mutilated. No one had caught him leavingthe coroner's office, nor had anyone noticed as he dropped the pass card and ID on the lobby floor, where he knew they would be found. Shannon, his partner in crime, had told the nurses that she suddenly felt much better and felt she could go. She had been, of course, the beautiful blonde that had stumbled into the ER, distracting the nurses. I t had all been a part of the plan. The nurses insisted that she be looked at by a doctor, but it was soon determined that there was nothing obviously wrong with her. They took some blood and sent her home with stern instructions to get some rest.

She had instead gone to see l\fichael. He wouldn't talk to her though, or to anyone else. After several days, she decided she had to do something and called him again. "Hello?" "Hi, ]\;fike? It's me, Shannon." "Ah... yes." ''Mike,I'mworried.lhaven'tseen you for a few days and you won't talk to anyone. What's up? What did you see in there?" "I'd rather not talk about it." "I think it'd help if you did." ''I doubt it." He snapped. Shannon sighed, '~inel\fike, that's fine. Look though, ifyou everneed to talk, just ginune a call, alright?" "Alright." "Oh, and Mike?" "Yeah?" ',,!:urn on your TV, local news . ! - , they're runningsomething¢.atI think you may be interested in." \ l\fike hung up the phone and sat for a moment beforewalkingin to the living room to tum on the TV. When he did, he saw a news conference with a stem-looking man in uniform speak-

ing. The TV identified him as a police officer by the name of Detective Korsokov. "As some ofyou may have heard," the detective began, "there was a murder on March 24, which took place on the campus o( the Universityof Waterloo. This murder was extremely violent and calculated in nature. At this time, we have no leads or suspects, and as a result we are asking the community for help. The young man who was murdered was named William Bankmann, a student at the university," as the officer spoke, a picture of a smiling young man was inlaid in the upper right-hand corner of the screen, "in his third year of the pre-optometry program. At this time, the last person to see him alive was his roommate Eric Katz. If anyone has any information about who Mr. Bankmann might have met or if he might have had any enemies, please call the police at... " Mike turned the TV off and relaxedinto the couch. He had known Will Bankmann, though not very

well. Theywere in the same year, in the same program, and so had run into each other from time to time. l\fike had never really known his name though, and the corpse he had seen looked nothing like the guy he remembered. Mike's curiousity and sense of jusrice so far had been thwarted, but now there was something he could do. Per-. haps nothing would come ofit;hewas, after all, not a detective. To him though, it felt wrong not to do something. He

. felt personally attached, now that he had seen the man who had been killed. And besides, now he had a lead. He hurried off to get dressed. He was about to make the acquaintance of the first link in a chain. He was about to meet Eric Katz.

Don'tforget to read prior installmeNts Ross' serial fiction olllillc at imprint.uwater!

0/ Mark




s u a

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Editor's note: This is a continuation from the January 14 edition ofi\iaps and Legends The ugly cousin of domestic violenceis infidelity; another AIDS highway. The highest rates of mv infection in Guyana are found amongst men working in the mining industry (six: per cent) and female sex workers (31 per cent); again, no coincidence. JlvIigratory workers and promiscuous behaviours continue to contribute to the spread ofthe infection, while absti-

nence lmd fidelity are preached from the pulpit and fading posters in public buildings. Dancehall has eclipsed reggae as the music of choice throughout the Caribbean; however, the heirs to Bob Marley's throne, Beenie Man chiefly among them, have moved far away from his songs of freedom and suffering. The current generation of stars is too preoccupied singing "Battyman f{ dead" (gay men must die) to worry about jammin' or crying over the lost love of a woman. In Jamaica, even the political parties have cashed in on its popularity. The Labour Party began playing "Chi Chi Man," a song about killing and setting fire to gay men at their rallies during the past general election. Understandably panicked

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about losing the apparently imp ortantgay-bashingvote, therulingNational Party responded with the election slogan "Log On to Progress," a reference to a popular song and dance (''log on') involving kic;kingor stomping on gay men. The title of a recent Human Rights Watch report on homophobia and its connections to the spread of HIV / AIDS in Jamaica sums it up succinctly: and pulls no punches: it is simply titled "Hated to Death." Thankfully, things are not so dire in Guyana. Homosextiality is tolerated to an extent, but there is a significant part of the population that believes that it is a sinful act and they are not shy about promoting their views in television talk shows and the print media. The common message

o ulati n amongst conservative commentators is that moving to a more liberal society will result in an increase in "rape, carnal knowledge, incest and all forms of sexual abuse," according to arch-traditional.columnist Roy Paul. To him, it's immoral and opening the door to accepting gays will lead to a bum rush of Guyana's worst societal nightmares. Tellingly enough, he references Beenie Jlvbn's well-known views on homosexuality in his writing and while he does not quite agree with the latter's promotion of the killing ofhomosexuals, he does believe that Guyana should "make non-violent efforts to stop and discourage [homosexuality] from spreading" in his November 20, anti-gay tirade "What makes Gayness a Right?"

Homophobia is vile enough in its own right, but the public's association between HIV / AlpS andhomosexuality creates a climate of fear and paranoia surrounding the disease, and in light of problems with patient confidentiality, is a major disincentive to getting oneself tested. The great irony in all of this, which would be funny if the situation wasn't so grave, is that two-thirds of new HIV infections in the Caribbean are due to heterosexual transmission. The facts are clear, but the stigma remains. The health workers with whom I spoke were divided on whether Guyana is moving forwards or backwards on stemming the tide ofinfections. The government's clear and unequivocal position that discrimination against HIV / AIDS victims is intolerable in the case of the Mission Chapel School incident was encouraging, butit is politically easy to take the side of a helpless two-year old orphan. A more recent development gives me pause. In early December, The Economist reported that Caribbean prisons were !!laior sources of new HIV infections in the region. Soon after, Guyana's Minister of Health, Dr. Leslie Ramsammy, pl,lblicly mused about distributing free condoms to prisoners in Guyana. Reaction to this rather benign suggestion was quick and telling. Church groups were outraged by what they viewed as tacit government lmpport ofhomosexuality (orsodomy as they prefeF"to label it) and picketed and denounced Dr. Ramsammy at every opportunity. Later that same week, President Bharrat J agdeo announced that the Guyanese government was definitely not going to distribute free condoms to prisoners. Finally, on Sunday December 12, a Kaitctlr Neu's article quoted an anonymous government official who said that "[AIDS and] sodomy [are] not prevalent in Guyanese prisons." To reinforce this, he stated that only 12 of 1,200 prisoners in Guyana are known to have AIDS. It strikes me as highly dubious that the same government that has not been able to compile and release the results of the year 2000 census knows with any authority that exactly 12 of its 1200 or so prisoners have AIDS. To abuse a well-worn analogy, a whole host of social stigmas and ills have combined to produce a perfect AIDS storm that ultimately may be more devastating than any of the hurricanes that regularly chum across L1e Caribbean have ever been. There are a wide variety of positive and very helpful interventions and programs tocombatHIV / AIDS in place across the region and in Guyana, but as long as there are conditions that allow this virus to spread, silently and effectively throughout a vulnerable society, the Caribbean will remain seriously at risk of becoming a second Sub-Saharan Africa.



cercIS In creatIve rocrastlnatlo They're not excuses, they're reasons ... backed up by extraordinary stories Clltlsisfellt!y hi/arioNs writing, enty wMk, a tiny rqy orf!l11Jhill8 into their otbel"llJise dark lites 0/ acar/elllic toil. III return I receipe no compensatioN bryond the honour of.reeiNg a picftfre ~l lI~Ys/!(f, albeit aile II/itb a stem military haire-tit, if! plint each )I'eek, as lye/I,u the occasional letler from an angry feminist. I Cl:lnllot break this «lIJenan!, IVIs. Thurman. Well, if that's the way you feel, I understand. Habah, j1lst kiddil1g! 1'II grab some scented OJ/f.

fh!(.f addjJl~1!,

The Wishful Thinking Scenario Setting: Lobby Bar in Toronto's Four Seasons Hotel Adam: IJ7aiter! Bring me another bottle r:f Coateatl j1vlo1tfon-&thscbikl, lIith IJJhich to drink 1J!y pmb/ems aJll'l)' (rob). (Enter Uma Thurman:) Uma: \\iow, you know what? I really use a shiatsu massage. ] 'specially one from a university newspaper columnist; one with hauntinglypenctrating brown eyes, co-op experience in government [mance, and amusing stories involving accounting quizzes! Where win I find such a man? Als. Thtl/7Jlan, Ifit y01l!' description to a T. I-lOlP8IJcr, as at! Imprint NlIlIm",,·, i /Jt!l!f a sacred pact to prol'id~ the x/mients of ff'aterioo IlJitb

The Colonial Scenario Setting: The British Colony ofRhodesia,1887 Baron Henry ThistlcVv"1ck, Renowned Big Game Hunter: Doctor, will he make it? Doctor Livingstone: Baron,l am afraid that Adam has contracted a case ofAfrican Sleeping Sickness, brought on by a bite from the dreaded tsetse fly. I'll wager a farthing he shan't sce the morning. Baron: Alas, is this the fate the gods have allotted to the greatest jour-

nalist the British Empire has ever known? _And he has a column due tomorrow! Why, lord, why have you forsaken us?

I am afraid that Adam has contracted a case of African Sleeping Sickness, brought on by a bite from the dreaded tsetse fly. I'll wager a farthing he shan't see the morning. - Dr. Livingstone -------.---------Lawrence of Arabia: Maybe I can revive him! Doctor: What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in Arabia? Lawrence: I'm lost.

It's no secret that guys have an easier time reaching orgasm than girls. Unless are frequent masturbators, most \vomcn will tell you that tlley didn't have an orgasm until tlley becanle sexually active, and many women still haven't even enjoyed the breath-taking sensation that can only come from the big-O. It's these women, "\vho have yet to explore their bodies, who are not having orgAsms. Femaks need to be aware of their sexual requirements lmd what puts them over the edge toward an orgasm. So why is it so nccess<u-y for girls to achieve orgasm during sex? It's perfectly n01mal fOJ: women to enjoy intercourse \vithout getting off. Guys seem to think thatiftheyaren't bringing their woman to her dimax, then they're bad lovers. Thoughts like these, in tum, make women f,=-'Cl the need to support their man and cemvince him 111at he's amazing ill bed.

For all you guys out there who think that this doesn't apply to you, listen up. It's surprisingly easy for a woman to convince her partner that he's fulfilling her wildest fantasies ...

aU she has to do is 'ooh' and 'ahh' a bit, swivel her hips, and her man thinks he's the [ncredible Hulk in bed (when really, he's more along the lines of Sponge Bob Square Pants). It's difficult for girls to listen to a guy

The Ancient Egyptian Scenario Setting: The Banks of the Nile, 1500BC Pharaoh j\menhotep: So, Adam, who's going to be in your column this \veek? J-lo'5 gut a ne\v album and she's looking super fresh, rf"e!~ aetua/b, I can 'I rl:'.aJb ?prite "!y co/"mll fhi, 2wek ... \l{'hat? No way? How come? W'ell, iii JOu 'l't fi)~?,ottffl, YON ms/m":d me, ),Ot! dick. Oh yeah! Get back to work, that pyramid isn't going to build itself. The Affleck Scenario OK, time to start JJq collimn! W'bo to illtm1ieJ!! this JJleek? That Donald Tt'tttltp artain!; .>eelJU to be red-hot

The Realistic Scenario Setting: Adam's house OK, time to start m)' mbmm! TeleYlsion: Up next on Montel: If my girlfriend is really a man, then where did my kids come from? BJ' "start ll~y co/tmm"1 actual!)' meant "IiOt start lJty ?'01tf1J1fI. -.,

irs WbIIvOltre r _

aking the "big-O" That's right --I'm talking about ,vomen org~tSn1. For ali you guys out there who think that this do(;sn't apply to you, listen up. it's surprisingly easy for a woman to convince her partner that he's fulfilling her wildest fantasies ---

I fum: aJl'ClkeJltr/! Thanks to 1J~y n.gor-comtitlltion and penchant for tbe pamJite JJ'aJ liO lJJatch for me! Bn-'tg me {/ quill {/ild a .lbeqfofpapJ!rt!s: /lnrlwhat's LLlll'r6'IICf of Arabia doing bere? Baron: God save the Queen! (Enter Hippopotamus, which swallows Adam whole.) Lawrence of Arabia: Damn you, hippopotamus! Damn you to hell! OilJ

right fiOII-', )Ii/Wi It'ilh bir IWP iI''''''-r1>1N' ami (Ill. lHe picks up tbepbofle and riff/Is] lvanka Trump: Hello? 11'hat's htlPlJelliltg? Ivana: Adam! You calledl You know, I really thoughtwe connected in St. Tropez last month, I've been thinking about you a lot ... Maybe we could grab some sushi tomorrow? adtltllfy, J was 2lJonrieritJg if I [OHId talk to },Ott!" dad ... bold on, 1'r8/;o! a calion the other litlt. BenAffleck:Johnsie! \X'hat you up to? Oh, jOt.! knOll', notbing much, jttst pmcticillJ!, !J!)' magical brand of worHdass joltmaii,lllt. Affleck: Forget that; let's go shoot paintballs at the adult video store! YIJU't'f! gotyotmelj (/ date.


complain rhathe can' q;,retheroff, especially when she's h,rving trouble even gettingherselfoffmostofthe time. This is what leads her towards the dishonest ego--stroking -_.-- it's just easier. And it keeps theguyquietandhappy, \vhileshe can try to figure outwhaes going\\-rong. Wl1alevcr sexual relationship you're in, there's always going to be difficulties--- women achie,'ing orgasm is a common one. The only way to avoid a situatl0uin which a woman feels the need to lie about sex is to have open communication. If the two of you can talk honestly abow- the sexual aspect of your relationship, then she probably \von't fed like she has to fake it. Girls, explore your body. If you don't know how to masl:U1'bate, purchase a beginner vibrator and start getting to know yourself. This is the only way you're going to learn how to help him bring you to your ciima.,,\:. Guys, stop feeling like you have to be a Jedi Master in bed. 11lC more pressure you put on getting her off, themorelikdyshew:illhavc to fake her orgasms. listen to what she needs, and explore from there.



The following materials are acceptable in residential Blue Box and Cart recycling programs. Residential quantities only.


Plastic Grocery and Retail Bags

• Cereal, tissue, and detergent-type boxes, cardboard egg cartons, toilet tissue and paper towel rolls etc. How: remove food, plastic bag liner, foil etc. then flatten and stuff in an unflattened box • Includes inserts

How: bag or tie

Magazines 8r catalogues How: bag or tie

Telephone, Hard Cover 8r Paperback Books

&&~&&&& • Only rigid food, beverage, personal, pet care and detergent containers (NO styrofoam) How: remove plastic caps and lids and place ~ in Blue Box. Empty, rinse and place containers ~ in Blue Box



All Rigid Plastic Containers

How: stuff inside one bag and place in bottom of Blue Box

Aluminum Foil Wrap 8r Foil Trays How: rinse and crumple foil; flatten trays




Holt": bag or tie

Glass Food, Beverage, Personal 8r Pet care Bottles 8r Jars How: empty, rinse and place loose in Blue Box

Metal Food 8r Beverage Containers • "Includes aluminum & tin cans

How: empty, rinse and place ~ in Blue Box

Paint 8r Aerosol cans • ~ and

Household Fine Paper

.d.I¥ paint cans, ~ aerosol cans

How: remove lids and place both lids and cans

• Includes white and coloured writing paper, bills, "junk maW', etc. How: bag or tie


Corrugated Cardboard • Identified by 2 outer, thin-walled liner boards and a corrugated waffle in tt,le middle How: flatten and tie (max. 75 cm x 75 cm x 20 cm ~30"

Drinking Boxes, Milk 8r Juice cartons How: remove plastic caps and place ~ in Blue Box. Empty, rinse, flatten containers and place ~ in Blue Box

x 30" x 8")

BLUE BOX RECYCLING HOW-T", (For Region ~ Waterloo households with curbside colledion) FLATTEN" STUFF


- boxboard (inside unflattened box)

€ newspapers & inserts • magazines & catalogues


- telephone books - household fine paper - hard cover & paperback books

- rigid plastic containers - aluminum foil wrap & foil trays - glass food & beverage bottles & jars , - metal food & beverage containers - lids - ~ and.d.l¥ paint cans and aerosol cans - ~ and flatten milk or juice containers

STUFF - plastic retail bags into one bag - place in bottom of Blue Box

FLAnEN AND TIE • corrugated cardboard (max. 75cm x 75cm x 20cm or 30·x 30" x 8")

CAR I RECYCLING HOW-TO (For Region of Waterloo apartments, townhouses" condominiums)


newspapers & inserts magazines & catalogues telephone books hard cover & paperback books household fine paper boxboard (flattened & stuffed inside unfJattened box) plastic retail bags stuffed in one bag

Theonlycu for

CARDBOARD CART - flatten & place in cart loose



- rigid plastic containers - aluminum foil wrap & foil trays . 1. . ._- glass food & beverage bottles & jars - metal food & beverage containers - ~ and .d.I¥ paint cans • ~ aerosol cans - empty and :furttm milk cartons and juice containers

For More Information Call: 883-5100 visit our website at or turn to the green pages in your phone book.



The vilJage vs. the city: changes ahead Darren Hutz and Scott Houston IMPRINT STAFF

With leases and residence contracts ending and new ones being written, Imprint proudly presents a comparison; a juxtaposition if you will, of life in the villages against life on the outside. For those of you living off-campus already, enjoy a stroll down memory lane; for the residents, beware of the shape of things to come. Food

Blessed is the village meal plan. Never forget that. I can remember growing weary of Mudies and REVelation by the end of the semester, partially due to an incident involving a crunchy lasagna noodle and an o,:eractive imagination, but now I certainly miss it. Offcampus, one gains complete control of their diet and food intake. It is a big responsibility. While it becomes easier to eat healthy, at the same time itis much easier to spiral into a diet of white toast and microwaveable macaroni and cheese. It comes down towhatyou pick up from the grocery store. Once you have purchased the food, you must then cook the food. This is a whole new world of challenge. Cooking itself can be fun, but doing the dishes is not. When you have fInished a delicious l;Ileal, the last thing you want to do is work, elbow deep in grease and soap. Being served from a cafeteria allows you to be remarkably lazy without having to worry about starvation. Even if you don't miss the caf food, the convenience is hard to let go of.


Living off campus, it is likely that you won't be fIve minutes away from the SLC anymore. Things like public transportation and footnumbing treks become commonplace, depending on how far from campus you live. A bus pass is recommended ifyou are going to bus to classes four out of fIve days a week and don't forget side treks to commercial centres for food, clothing and other necessities. The GRT has a special $139 bus pass, that's good for only three months. In addition, you could learn the bus schedule, but GRT is rarely punctual; you'll need to get used to your particular bus route and drivers to make it to class on time. If you have a car, you are very lucky, but you still have to pay for gas,maintenanceandinsurance- keep that in mind. Don't forget stressful traffIc; Waterloo's characteristic winter conditions -especially freezing rain and snow. On top ofall that, if you want to drive anywhere other than major grocery stores and campus, you'll have to master K/W's crooked one-way streets and bizarre dead ends. You will fwd that there are plenty of both. Housekeeping

Your mom cannot save you and not even your housemom can save you. When actually on your own, sanitation becomes a major concern. You and your friends may not mind empties on the counter, pizza boxes growing mould and dishes festering in the kitchen and bathroom sinks and of course the bathtub, but it may be hazardous to your health. To address


Back country toilet bowl or off-campus kitchen? This could be your house. this, buy the necessary hardware: brooms, mop and bucket, vacuum, dish detergent, dust rags, and all that other weird stuff you remember mom using at home. It turns out that messes and odours don't simply disappear like years of living at home may have led you to believe. Politics

You and your roommates are bound to fIght, be it over the last beer or slice of pizza, or more important things like rent and cleaning duties. There is no longer a don to mediate

between you and your peers, so agreements must be reached through exhaustive negotiation. Rules must be made and fairly enforced. Moving out of residence doesn't have to be a horrible experience, although life does become considerably more complicated.To uncomplicate things, just understand what you're getting into beforehand.

Thirsty fora challenge? Employer Info Seision join us for a two-part presentation on: • Entrepreneurship and starting your own business

Students interested in joining the Yes and No Committees fur the upcoming Dental PJan and Orientation Fee Referenda are encourag«l to COfltaa: OliefRennning Offi.cer Brandon Sweet at or 888-4567 x6781 to be put in touch with the appropriate conunittee.

The Referenda Will be held from Tuesday, February 15th to Thursday, February 17th.

i" •

Working at imason

Location: Room TC 2218" 7:00-9:00 PM. Thursday, January 27th


FREE Food & Drinks! Don't forget your Resumel

imason inc. is a boutique Toronto consulting firm with a six ~ history and more than two dozen employees. We specialize In deliwlrin& unique solutions based on Microsoft technology.

2005 EXECtITIVE, U)UNClL AND SENATE ELECTIONS! Feb 15th to Feb 17th.

lmason is: • more than 55% Waterloo grads, . • staIUd by Waterloo grads,

• hutyy for more of the best!

An MBA Is nice, If you haw the time. tfyou don't, Larry Smith's ECON 101 and 102 will get you .". Drop by and listen to a few lessons learned the hard WIlf.

VISit us at

imBson inc.

or apply at

web technOlogy tl'lat works

l:~DIT()R -11Y-(~HIE~

I \iPRt:\




Pl BLlC\ j IO\S

IMPRINT, the University of Waterloo student newspaper, is hiring an Editor-In-Chief fulltime for a 13-month contract beginning March 31, 2005. You will train, manage, motivate and lead a great volunteer staff and ensure the quality of all editorial content, layout and design. Must possess strong organizational skills, be familiar with Adobe desktop publishing and photo editing packages, layout and design. KnowledgeofUnixl Linux and networking a definite asset. If you enjoy a challenging and fast-paced environment, send a resume, clippings and cover letter to Hiring Committee, Imprint Publications, 200 University Ave., W., UniversityofWaterloo, SLC room 1116, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3G1 or fax: (519)884-7800, byJanuary31, 2005.

FINANCIAL AID January 2005 January 21 - OSAP Application Deadline (reduced funding) for fall and winter. Last day"to submit . OSAP rollover form to add winter term. Visit our website at: infoawards for winter 2005 loan pick up schedule, complete OSAP scedule with deadlines for winter term, scholarship and bursary information and work study pOsitions for winter 2005.

UPCOMING Friday, January 21, 2005 Coats for K9's event runs until March 31, 2005. Crearure Comfort Pet Emporium invites you tp bring in used or unwanted pet supplies (in clean and useable condition) such as dOg coats, booties, beds, crates nail dippers, etc., that will be donated to rescue groups and shelters in need. In return you will receive 15% off any new item purchased. Please see website for further information and address: Monday, January 24, 2005 Central Ontario Orchid Society. General monthly meeting; speaker/seminar/demos, library, plant sales tables, orchid supplies, raffies, show table, refreshments and good company. 7:00 - 9:00 p.m. St. Joseph's Church (lower hall), Courtland/ Madison, Kitchener. Free for visitors. 634-5540. Wednesday, January 26, 2005 Sex columnist Josey Vogels will speak at 5 :30 p.m. in AL 113. Hailed "Canada's Carrie Bradshaw," Josey will speak on sex, dating and relationships. Hosted by the Arts Student Union, Josey's talk is free to all UW students. Saturday, January 29, 2005 Volunteer fair at Fairview Park mall. Displays will be set up by the Volunteer Action Centre along with

lanuary 31,2005 ... 6.30 pm


thirty other not-for-profit organizations offering interesting and rewarding volunteer opportunities for youth, families, groups and adults. Please join us at the mall or you can also discover volunteer options at Sunday, January 30, 2005 UW Day with the Siskins, Jr. B hockey, 1:30 p.m. Waterloo Memorial Recreation Centre, $2 per ticket (regular $8). Please contact for further information. Friday, February 4, 2005 lSAT? If so, the LRO is hosting a mock LSAT to help UW students prepare, from 1:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. For more infO/sign up sheet, drop in to SLC 3107 for more details or you can contact Vickie at Saturday, February 5, 2005

Chinese Students & Scholars Association presents The Annual Chinese Spring Festival Party. All are warmly welcome to attend at South Campus Hall, 7:00 to 9:00 p.m. For tickets or more info please contact UW Ski Day @ Chicopee, four-hour lift ticket for $19. Tickets available by contacting prior to Monday, January 31. Saturday, February 12, 2005 K-W Skating Oub presents "Showcase 2005" ice show at the Waterloo Memorial Recreation Complex at 7:00 p.m. For tickets/info call 886-5972 or e-mail Thursday, February 24, 2005 It's cold outside but it'll heat up when the Waterloo Fire Department takes to Fed Halls stage in "Hot Night in the City" to benefit Easter Seals. For ticket info e-mail

CLASSIFIEDS SERVICES ''Ultimate Questions" The Lord Jesus Christ is the difference. Learn about Him. Bible study by correspondence. Please send name and address to: Bible study, Zion United Reformed Church 1238 Main St., Sheffield, ON LOR 1Z0 or e-mail See web site: click on Links, ask for book. Sign up today, it's free. Term Paper help from dedicated writing professionals with more. than 30 years experience. E.S.L., research & writing, editing and proofreading, entrance letrers and thesis help. Toll Free 1-888-345-8928 or Mustan Computer Systems Inc - sales and service, free pickup and delivery, service charge flat rate $35. For all your computer needs call 886-6004. We fix any computer problem - $55 flat - plus free diagnosis! Pop ups, viruses, spam, hardware - we fIX it all. Visit our store or call 741.5979. Waterloo Networks, 220 King Street, N., across from WLU, behind Phil's. Custom essay writing and research assistance - Essay Experts can write an essay or research papers on any topic, level and for any deadline. Call 1-877974-TEXT or visit

HELP WANTED Weekend counsellors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Minimum eight-month commitment. Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, K-W Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, Etchener, ON, N2G 3V2. Let's make this your best summer yet - Camp Wayne, northeast Pennsylvania, USA. Counselor-specialists all land/water sports inc. Tennis, golf, baseball, soccer, outdoor adventure: camping, mountain biking, climbing/ropes, roller hockey, rocketry, fine arts, theater, radio, video, CDL drivers, wait staff and more. RN's for our health center. Interviews in conjunction with 4-SchoolJob Fair,Wednesday, February 2. Let's get the ball rolling now! Online application; e-mail: or 1-888-549-2963 (516883-3067). SlipStream Job oPportunities: Now hiring in R&D, QA and Technical Support. See complete details for all positions at www.slipstream.comlcareers.html and join us at our Information Session in the Fishbowl January 25 from 5-8 p.m. Camp Trillium - The Trillium Childhood Cancer Support Centre, is a non-profit organization that provides recreation and support programs that help enhance the quality of life for children and their families living with childhood cancer. We are looking for full-time paid summer staff for our two overnight residential camps: nurses, high ropes instructors, lifeguards, group leaders, cooks and kitchen help, maintenance/boat drivers, creative, enthusiastic, kid lovin' people and many more! YOU can bring a smile to a child who happens to have cancer. You must be at least 18 years to apply. Please visit our website to apply for more information Please forward a copy of your resume and direct all questions to Kelley at Kelley Otter, Director of Programs, 200 Main Street, W., Hamilton, Ontario, L8P 4Y4. Telephone (90S) 527-1992, ext 23 or 1-888-999-2267, ext 23 or fax (905) 527-5314. Mechanic and sales people wanted. Ziggy's Cycle and Sport is looking for an experienced mechanic and sales people. You can e-mail or call Margaret Pachnik at 893-2963 and/or Like working with kids and teens? Plan to go to teachers college? Need a summer job? City ofWaterloo camp employment opportunities. May - August. Rate of pay $8.25 - $10.25/hour. Camp applications available at Career Services or!CSIHR. Independent contractors required for door to door daily newspaper delivery. 4:00 a.m. to 6:30 a.m. 6 days a week. Earn $400.00 to $600.00 per month. Phone 894-2250 ext. 6020. Reliable vehicle required.

FOR SALE Brand new factory sealed Bell ExpressVu 3100 receiver - no contracts to sign - includes card, remote, manual and cables. $225 or best offer. Can 7211231.

HOUSING Free Apartment Fmder Servicesl Over 8,000 apartments in our database. We make appointments, you save time! High rise, low rise, town homes, furnished and unfurnished. All prices! Call now for this free service. 310-7000. 23A High Street off Hazel, modern self contained, main floor, four bedroom,. living room, kitchen, complete modern bathroom, free laundry and parking, no pets. Group tenancy for four students, available May 1/05 to Aug. 30/06, $445 per student, including utilities. Contact June Smith 416-491-1370, cell: 416-705-5648. Four bedroom, eJ[cellent location - close to everything, washer/dryer, dishwasher, air conditioning, parking, huge patio, perfect for students, only one space left. Call 741-7724, for more info. 23B High Street off Hazel - modern self contained three bedroom, living room, kitchen, complete bathroom, free laundry and parking. Group tenancy for three students, no pets, 12-month lease required May 1/05 to Aug 30/06. $415 per student, utilities included. Contact June Smith at 416-491-1370, cell: .416-705-5648. Five bedroom house - excellent location, close to everything, very clean, washer/dryer (not coin operated), gas heated, two bathrooms, large driveway, on bus route, large backyard patio. Call 741-7724. 11 & 13 Menno - very modern, recently built, R2000 duplex, five bedrooms, two bathrooms, kitchen, livingroom, diningroom, unfurnished, free laundry & parking, no pets.. Group tenancy for five students, 12-month lease required, available Sep 1/05 to Aug. 30/06, $360 per student, plus utilities. Contact June Smith 416-491-1370 or cell: 416-7055648. large three level recently Quality fall rental refinished five bedroom, three bathroom townhouse. Four appliances included with free laundry, two car parking, cable/internet, 15 minute walk to uw. One year lease, $400 per person per month plus utilities. Call Peter/Kathy 885-1086. Student rental- five students to share a licensed five bedroom condo at 451 Albeh Street. Rooms from $340 to $400 per month, per room, plus hydro. Lease from May 1, 2005 to"Aprii 30, 2006. Call Shawn at 635-5332.


SCIENCE & TECHNOLOGY ~~'U~~~ Huygens probe transmits incredible data Interesting data beams down from Titan probe Adam Gardiner IMPRINT STAFF

Human space exploration has passed a very important milestone. An international effort to study Saturn reached an important peak over the last week and the results are leaving the space exploration community buzzed with excitement. Last Saturday, the Huygens space probe landed on Saturn's moon Titan and began sending images and data back to Ea,rth. Scientists from NASA and the European Space Agency were previously unable to gather much information on Titan, due to its gas veil. They were particularly keen to explore Titan because they theorized that its atmosphere, already resembling Earth's in its heavy composition of nitrogen, contains organic compounds similar to those Earth contained before life began. To study this theory further, Huygens was equipped to sample the atmosphere, collect images and search for lakes of liquid methane. It did not disappoint. The first images Huygens sent back were black and white photos of bumpy surfaces. Large rocks and bou1-

ders were clearly visible: likely chunks of ice, they appeared to be shaped by the movement of liquid against their surfaces. The next day, photos were received that depicted Titan's ground as an orange surface, covered by methane fog, with a sea, islands and a coastline in the distance. Liquid was seen flowing upon the surface and the onboard microphones picked up a "whooshing" sound that has yet to be identified. On Monday, the Huygens team of scientists revealed more findings from the probe. They've been at the European Space Operations Centre in Darmstadt, Germany since the 14th, preparing for and analyzing the images and data they receive from Huygens. The team takes individual photographs and creates composites, either on computer or by literally cutting and pasting prints, to get topographical views of the land on Titan. In addition to the shorelines and channels formed in the surface, they've revealed the possibility of weather patterns, identifying white lines on their pictures that cou1d be clouds of methane mist. The theory was supported on Tuesday by the discovery that

Huygens landed on a surface the team has nicknamed "Lake Tapioca" because of its spongy, muddy quality created by residue from evaporating and sinking methane. The most important message arising from all these details is that Titan is far from a mere rock in space, devoid of activity. The data Huygens sent back is enough to fill four hundred CD-ROMs and will take years to analyze completely, but those who have given it an in-depth look are already making bold statements about the mission's findings. "All of these things sound so similar to what we see on our own Earth," commented Dr. Athena Coustenis, a member of the Huygens team. I van Semeniuk of the Discovery Channel reported that Titan has "all of the building blocks of life sitting on the surface," and Bob Mitchell from NASA went so far as to call the mission "one of, if not the, biggest single step that mankind has taken." It's a big step that has been a long time coming. The Huygens probe is part of a $3 billion USD international mission. Officially referred to as the Cassini-Huygens mission, in honour of two seventeenth century Saturn observers, it was sponsored by NASA, the European Space and the Italian Space

Agency. Planning for the mission Qegan in the 1980s and assembly started on the pri~ spacecraft, Cassini, in 1995. In 1997 Cassini was launched with an array of 12 scientific instruments and the Huygens probe, flying thro~gh space for seven years before fmally assuming orbit around its destination some 2.2 billion miles away from Earth last Ju1y. Huygens was launched from Cassini in December as Cassini passed Titan in Saturn's orbit. It took three weeks for the probe to land on the surface. Ironically, for all the effort put into it, Huygens' batteries were only designed to operate for a few hours; it ceased operating shortly after its landing. Cassini, however, remains in orbit around Saturn and is designed to function for another four years. So far, the long effort has paid off. There have been virtually no glitches in operation since Cassini/Huygens reached Saturn and the resulting gift will keep on giving to scientists of the North American and European space agencies for years to come. I t appears !he four-year stretch ahead is off to a titanic start.

This image of Titan's landscape was pieced together from several smaller images. Together, the pictures form a 360 degree panorama around the space probe.

Engineers strike back at poverty - via international humanitarian effort

Engineers Without Borders is Canada's leading charitable organization dedicated to helping meet the United Nations ]'vfillennium Development Goals - halving w~rld poverty by 2015. The organization was started ~n 2000 by University of Waterloo engineering graduates George Roter and Parker .Mitchell. Five years later the organization has 6,000 members and 22 chapters across the country. The mission of the organization is to promote human development through access to technology. With these aims in mind, they have sent over 70 young engineers to work on 35 projects in 20 countries. They have also inspired the formation of similar groups in nine European countries and the United States. Complimenting their overseas internships,

EWB works with international partners in term sustainability. "Sustainability to [EWB1 is such areas as energy, water and sanitation, and not strictly environmental sustainability, it's food production and processing in order to human sustainability. We talk about sustaining build capacity in the rural technology sector. human life. There is also a high school outreach program that promotes sustainable development issues to the next generation. 'Pfhe world's problems Psychology student Andrew Dilts is a cocan't be solved by engiVP fundraising for UW's Engineers Without Borders chapter. He took some time out of his neers alone ... " busy schedule to answer a few questions about - Andrew Dilts EWB, sustainabilitT and student involvement. Noting that Dilts isn't an engineer, I was curious why EW'B encourages students from other facu1ties to get involved w-ith the group. "There are some situations where they're He responded, "The world's problems can't be able to bring technologies that allow people to be solved by engineers alone and they recognize more [ecologically1 sustainable in terms of getthat. And especially here at Waterloo where we ting water frotn'l11eir own local area; in terms of do have a strong engineering contingent and it , growing food that might be olit of :;eason or was founded by a couple of engineers they still preserving food out of season," he said. recognize that theX want to be reaching out to Engineers Without Borders is also an avthe other facu1ties. There's a surprising range of enue for students to incorporate their talent." coursework into the wider world and make a Sustainability, not surprisingly, is a complex difference. "F..ourth-year projects are a perissue. EWB's mandate focuses on people infect example of that. From what I understead of the environment but they still use the stand they are an essential pari of an engi-

neering degree in the research that they do, if any student wants to orient that towards development or js interested in development, they can come and use some ofE\VS's expertise," he said. Dilts had a couple of comments on the theme of getting students involved in university outside of the classroom. "I cannot overstate the importance of getting involved. It's not about resume building, it's really not - it's about getting involved in learning," he said. ''Through experience, people are actually able to handle situations better, are able to learn . more skills, they're able to develop more through that eA-perience. I t will benefit them for the rest of their life." In parting Dilts offered, ('It's really wonderful to be part of an organization that is so innovative and so driven yet so compassionate for the ~ituation of fellow students and people throughout the world." For more information about Engineers Without Borders check out or



The chemistry of successful highlights Jacqueline McKoy IMPRINT STAFF

One of the most popular and easy ways for people to enhance their appearance is to change their hair colour. Although many opt for dying their entire head of hair so that they can flnally prove that blondes have more fun, others try a tamer, sunkissed glow through highlighting.l}lthough highlighting is often a safer and more idiot-proof form of hair colouring, it too involves many chemical processes. Most highlighting colour applications are a form of permanent colour which contain hydrogen peroxide, ammonia and colour pigment. A cream peroxide solution, also known as developer, removes sulphur from the hair shaft making it brittle and more permeable. The developer also contains ammonia, an alkaline substance which separates the hair's cuticle and allows the pigment to completely penetrate each hair's cortex, or core. These two chemicals prepare the hair for retaining new colour pigment. Colour pigment is usually a phenolbased substance that reacts \'\lith oxygen gradually to show its colour;

this is why hair colour applications· often appear white or greyish when fIrst applied. Timing is key; however the only way to prevent the developer from continuing to change colour or lighten is to wash it out. Too much oxygen, normally the result of leaving the developer application on the hair for too long, allows the pigment'S chemical reaction to continue and tends to turn most hair colours a horrifying shade

the most precise colour placement; foil is used to both separate the sections of hair and to limit the chemical reaction between oxygen and the colour pigment. There are many popular alternate methods of applying highlights: such as using a large "streaking comb" (which is easy for do-it-yourself highlighters) and putting colour on pieces of hair randomly pulled through a plastic cap with holes. To lighten hair more than a few shades (from raven black to platinum blonde, for example) or to add an unusual colour or a more extreme form of permanent colour, double-process colouring is used. Double-process colouring uses a developer with enough hydrogen peroxide (usually more than 30 per cent by volume) to both expand the new pigment molecules and strip .the hair of its original pigment. . Semi-permanent and temporary hair colours, which either only cO,at the hair shaft or use less ammonia and peroxide than permanent hair colour, don't remove enough melanin from the hair to lighten substantially. As well, the pigments used have less capacity for oxygenation and thus stay small enough to be removed from the hair cortex in 6 to 12 shampoos. These two types of dye, however, are often used 'for "lo-lites," which are darker streaks that are great for adding defInition

of orange. Pigmeilt molecules are small enough to easily enter the hair shaft, where they combine with the hair's natural melanin and expand so they cannot be removed through shampooing, hence making the new hair colour permanent. For highlights, the combination of developer and pigment is mixed into a cream base for one-step application and is applied to the hair in foil-wrapped sections for


The ch~mistry. behind, highljght~ ing also covers much more complicated territory, such as the chemical composition ofdyes - a subject that requires more than a miOor knowledge 'of organic chemistry to fully understand. Your next trip to the salon may seem more like going to a high school science fair, but you'll definitely feel like a kid in a candy store thanks to all the colouring options which chemistry provides.

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Hermaphrodite lobsters?

Tim Alemanciak IMPRINT STAFF

Amateur astronomers beat NASA at their own game The recent Titan data recieved by NASA was firstleaked onto the internet in an effortto disseminate the scientifically significant information as quickly aJi possible. When data comes from satellites,itrequires processingin order tocreate topographical maps, and other kinds of maps that can be understood by laymen. This time, a bunch of amateur astronomers collaborating over the internet managed to process the data before scientists at the ESA or NASA could get to it. This is the first time that a group of unofficial spaceagency affiliates have beaten the actual agencies to the punch, and serves to demonstrate just what a bunch of hobbyists are capable of. Hermaphrodite lobster: Canada's contribution to oddities A lobster sporting the genitalia of both sexes was caught off the coast QfNova Scotia. The lobster in question is split down the middle, in terms of colouring as well as in terms of genitals. It possesses both functioning components required t~ make .baby lobsters. Up unt;jl recently, the creature has been 'on display' in a local fish shop to raise money for charity. The catcher donated it to the Bedford Institute of Oceanography, where its multigenitaled glory will be available for everyone's gawking pleasure.


Sara Hotz (1B Honours Arts) shows off her highlighted hair.



Chris Parisien 4A Computer Sdence Chris is working on the Aerobody and the Mechanical system of Midnight Sun VIII

Sarah O'Connor 2A Honours Math Sarah is leading the Aerobody Construction while working on the Business Team

Are you interested in working with the next generation of mathematicians, engineers, and scientists? Are you looking for a part time job? Are you a Math student? If so, please contact us at to work on the educational aspect of the Midnight Sun!






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Quite often the team that scores first in a hockey game is the club that goes on to \"m the game. Ho\vever, the \,\'aterloo \Varriors men's hockerteam is on such a roll right now-- being undefeated in seven OU;\ games -that even when Laurier opened the scoring of last Saturday night's contest, \v'aterloo still secured a 4-1 victory over the Golden Hawks. More importantly, the \\'arnors (86-1) gained anothervaluable two points '0 ':tay ahead of \1('LU (7-7··1) and \v'incisor in what is shaping up to be a tight playoffrace, especially after division rival Windsor (7-6.1) swept Lakehead in a two-game series last weekend. Being a classic Battle of Waterloo tilt, the Waterloo·Lauder game could be described as a Saturday night brawl as a total of 56 minutes of penalties were accumulated between the two teams. As a result, four of the game's five goats came on the power play. Second-year centre J\Eke Della Mot'anearlyrecorded the game's first goal when he unleashed a buJlet from the slot that clanged squarely off the post. After his teammates coughed up goalie Curtis Darling continued his strong play of the past two months as he foiled an excellent shorthanded LaurieJ' scoring opportunity with a quick glove save. AfterWaterloohaddominatedplay throughout much of the opening frame, U\\7's Frank Fazio was called for hooking. On the resulting power play, Laurier got on the board first when 6'2", 200-pound right winger Chris DiUbaldo, who was part of a Hawks' three-on-two, fired a weak shot past a screened Darling at 7 :27. The remainder of the first period saw the two clubs whistled fora pair of penalties each, but neither side could

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Waterloo HaMiIe skier Hamed 0111 athlete of Ihe week -Jage28


capitalize on the ensuingpowerplays. One of Lauder's two penalties was called against former W'arriorRichard Scott, who hooked Fazio to the ice from behind while the UW pia yerwas streaking in ona breakaway. Justa fe-\V moments after this play, third-year centre Geoff Rivets cruised in all alone on Laurier netmillderJustin Day on another \1(7 aterloo breakaway. However, Daywas up to the challenge and stoned Rivers to preserve the Hawks' one goal lead. In the second frame, the \'{'aterloo offensive machine kicked it into high Displaying some undisciplined play, a frustrated Golden Hawks team was called for six penalties in the period including a 10-minute misconduct to Eric Larochelle. Meanwhile, U\v"s captain Chris Hopiavuori, who WllS called for roughing, was the only \\'arrior to be sent to the sin bin in the second period. \X!ithLaurier'sJamesEdgarofffor cross checking, \X'aterloo tied the game at 1:25 when Kevin Hurley out-hustled Laurier to the puck on a dump in and smartly banked the puck out front by using the end boards to a wideopen]\fattLevicki, who backhanded a low shot past Laurier's Less than 30 seconds later, .rookie Dave past and saucered a nice pass toJordan Brenner, who wired a nice shot past Day into the top half of the net'. Shortlr thereafter, Fazio rocketed in on his second breakaway of the game. This time he was able to get a shot away, but Laurier's goalie was somehow able to stop it. Next, second-year Hawk defenceman Adam Wood was called for hooking. With only six seconds remaining in this power play, \'{hterloo capitalized when Rivers backhanded his teammate's tebol.Uld past a helpless Day. The play started when Della Mora


Centre Geoff Rivers heads in on a breakaway in the Warriors' 4~ 1victory over Laurier atthe Waterloo Recreation Complex on January 15. Rivers failed to score on the play. sentthe puck back to Dustin Bauer at the point. Bauer then elected to shoot al'llltt!lClft:S1L!itl.!:lg'·1:el1i;\l;tllld cnded up on the stick ofRivers, the goal scorer. At U:25 of the second, Laurier's :!\IatthewSch"latr\vascalled rorslashing, \1(7are:doo's power play unit went to \vork again. After Adam Metherei and Philpott did some excellent work cycling the puck on the forecheck, the latter evaded one defender, came out front and fired a shot on goal. The rebound trickled into the slot where a streaking Brenner corralled the puck and wired it upstairs for his second of the game to put the Warriors up 4-1. The second period fInished \\>ith Waterloo out shooting Laurier 20-6. In the third period, Darling shut the door on the Hawks as he stopped all 11 of their shots th.rough good

positioning, eliminating rebounds and blocking all of Laurier's second

chances. The Wm:l'iors did, however, sut\ a scare early in the period \vhen the puck took a funny hop off the boards and went straight to an undefended Laurier torward. The OppOSe ing piayet wired the shot on the open net thinking that he had a sure goal, but the puck struck the crossbar and stayed out. When the final horn sounded the \Varriors emerged v1.<-i.orious \l.>1th a 41 ~ID, having out shot Laurier by an impressive 45-26 margin. \\'ith only three points separating the \1(7arriors and Lakehead in the standings, Waterloo will travel to Thunder Bay this weekend to face the Thunderwolvcs on their home ice in a two-game series.

Lakehead (10-4-0) \viU pose a stiff challenge felr the Warriors because l-hey arc currently l:"a.'1kednl.lrnber four in tile country. Also, they tradi60nally have tremendous fan support in their home arena, Fort \Xi ill1am Gardens, which can hold just oyer 3,1 00 fans. The two clubs have started to build a bit ofa rivalr<J after Lakehead knocked TJ\x' out of the playoffs last year and UW retumed the favour in the two team's season opener this year by beating t..~em 2-1 on October 22. This weekend's games r.ak:e place tonight, January 21, and tomorrow nibrht. Both start at 7:30 p.m. and can be heard on live radio rebroadcast onlineat\\,w\

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arriors fall in ran "ngs des ite 3-0 week Dan Micak ~--'--~-


With a record of 3-3 in their last six g,unes, the \x,'arriors men's basketball tean1 viewed their recent homestand as an opportunity to rdum to the early season form which saw the team go 6· oto start the season, With none of their three opponents on the week holding a winning record, a 3-0 run was certainly not out of the question. And despite various hardships over the week, including an injury to leading scorer Graham Jarman, the \X'arriors did not disappoint, dropping Toronto, Ryerson and \Vindsor in succession. "Y ou've got to give some respect to both Toronto and Ryerson," said coach' f om Kieswtterprior to the game

against Windsor. "They're both good teams. I give full credit to oun1.ctories; we didn't expect any walkovers." Tne \Varriors welcomed the To.. tonto Varsity Blues into the PAC on Friday, January 14 and were gt'<-'Cted \vith a stronger opponent th~U1 their record might indicate. Toronto came into the game at 5 -7, good for fourth place in the OUA East, but prowd formidable·-.drawingthe \\7aniorsinto overtime before dropping the game in the extra period by a score of89·84. Toronto opened the gdl11e strong, shooting 61.9 per cent in the fIrst half including 6-1 0 from behind arc. The Warriors kept it close, however, and were down 36-31 at halftime. In the second half, Toronto 1:\.vice moved ahead by eight, but \'\'aterloo battled back to grab the lead before the

buzzer. \i(7aterloo jmnped ahead, in fact, by as much as three in the final minute, onl y to sec their lead slip away and the game go into overtime on a buzzer-beating three-pointer from Toronto guard Mike Degiorgio. Dcgiorgio's shot forccd \'X,' aterloo into their first overtime g,une of the season. In the overtime period, \\i"aterloo fmallyplayed up to theirtruepotential, outscoring the Var81t1' Blues 82 in the first two minutes and ultimately defeating them by five. "Our guys goueally energized and focused [after beingdO\vnl, We did a good job offensively in overtirne. It was probably our best execution [during the game] in overtime, and that's really encouraging," said Kies\\'etter. Graham J alman lead the way with

24 points, 20 of them in the ~econd half and overtime. ]\.fike Sovran added 16 points and 9 rebounds for the winning side. The follO\ving day, Warerioo \velcorned the Ryerson Rams, "lvho had not yet managed to win a game in the season. I,ike the Toronto game, the Warriors did not play to their fu.u potential against Ryerson, allm.ying Ryerson to estahlish an 11·point lead eight minutes into tbe game, "There were lots ofexcuses why we wouldn't be ready tC)f the game:' noted Kieswetter, "[includingl the fact that they haven't \",on and Graham Uarman] \vasn't playing, [but1 we did not execute cady on." Waterloo yuickly came to, however, dominating the court for the remainder of the first half and

outscoringthe Rams 30-13. The \Varriors held a 22-9 edge in boards over the Rams in the half, Ibe Wan10rs continued theirdominance by oper..i,'lg the second half\'l'ith a 9-0 nm and then held on for the rest of the way. Again, the \X;'arriors main· rained a huge advant"b'<:: on the boards, pullingdO\vn 411'ebounds in totzl and ultimately defeating the Rams 82-73. Injuries were again the word of the day f.Jrtbe W'arriots ag;ainstRyersonas leading scorer GrahamJarman, \vho is '''''''N'y''',,, 16.2 points per game, was sidelined. The \VarriOJ:~ had six players score in double tlgmes to pick up the slack, including Andrew Coats\vorth who regis cered a double-double with 19 points and 11 rehounds.

See INJURIES, page 31


Skier Dupont named OUAAthlete of the Week women completing 10km and the men, 15km. The race on Saturday determined the starting positions of the Waterloo skiers. Dupont kept her lead and won the overall race for women, as did Hughson to win for the men. For her efforts over the weekend, the OUA named Andrea Dupont their female athlete of the week.


Curling teams stuck in the middle of the pack

DupGnt and Hughson record successful weekends The fust OUA qualifying race was held this past weekend for the nordic ski team. An individual time trial took place on Saturday, where both men and women from Waterloo won their divisions. Andrea Dupont won the women's division in a time of 17:08 for a 5km run and Bryon Hughson won the men's division in a time of23:58 for an 8.5km run. On Sunday, the competition focused on the skate technique with the

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The UniversityofWestem Ontario hosted West sectionals that were held this past week at the Ilderton Curling dub for both the men's and women's . curling teams. The Waterloo Warriors finished in the middle of the pack, with the women posting a 2-1 record and themen a 1-2record. These results will carry over to the Cross Overs,tobe held in early February. The women, had some early front end misses in game one against Windsor, as they took time adjusting to the ice. The Windsor team was able to keep close at the beginningofthe game but Waterloo took control through the fourth end and beyond. Though challenged at the late ends, the women received their first victory against the Lancers withanice scoreofthreein the ninth. The women's second match.was less successful as the teamfell to Western. The finalgame however, proved to be a come backas the Warriors controlled the game against Brock. The women participated well, \vith strong play by all positions and as a result the win was Waterloo's. The men's first game was against Windsor and saw the Warriors taking advantage of breaks and errors. The

team made too many tactical mistakes, however, and dropped to 0-1 at the bonspiel Bouncing back from the firstgame, the Wamors played a good second game, this time against Western. Though low scoring, the game went to Waterloo. The third game for the Waterloo men's team was against Brock. In this game, an easy win should have occurred," but the men failed to capture enough points to do so, leading to a final loss for the Warriors. 0"

WindsGr meet kind tG track team The Warnors track and field team travelled to Windsor this past weekend for the 24th Annual Can Am Track Classic. The two day event saw co-captain Shane Ferth Loin the top ten fastest in the country for the 300m, and place

third overall. Also on the track, second-yearsprinterEmie Ukwuomafinished sixth in the 60m event. Distance runners ScottAmald and Mike Logue continued to post stellar performances in the 1500m event, finishing sec9nd and fifth respectively. Aroald's finish pushed him up to the third rank overall in the country and qualifies him to compete at the CIS Championships in March at the University of Manitoba. For the women, co-captain Kate Bickle placed fifth in the 60m and Rebecca Murrant placed a respectable ninth in the 300m. WGmen's hGckey team mGves intG tie fGr final plaYGff SPGt The Warriorwomen's hockey team tied the York Lions 1-1 in their Friday night contest at Columbia Ice Fields. Despite numerous chances,including one in the last five seconds byJulianne

Schmalz, the Warriors simply could not pot the winner behind York goalie Melanie Quinn. Warriors goalie Bethany ~tuartwas equally strong between the pipes stoppingall butoneofthe 15 shots she faced. The following day saw the Warriors host the country's number three team, the Guelph Gryphons. Going into overtime, Guelph managed to score on Waterloo one minute in, leading to the consequential 2-1 overall score. Despite the loss, the Warnor's still acquired ap all-important single point which moved them into a tie with Windsor for the !astplayoff spot. The Warriors continue their homestand on Saturday, January 22 when they host Que!!fl's at 7:30 p.rn. The following day will see the Brock Badgers come into town for a matinee contest. Puck drop is at 2:00 p.m.

-with files from UW Athletics

Warrior nordic skier Andrea Dupont forces her way down a descent during,the first ~UA qualifying race of the year in Collingwood. Andrea won both her events at the meet.

us Queens Golden Gaels 7:30PM

Sunday, January 23 us Brock Badgers 2:00PM

us WLU Golden Hawks (W)6:ooPM (M)8:ooPM UWPACGym








Byron led the Warriors to victory in first Nordic Ski qualifier of the season in Collingwood. On Saturday, Bryon won the men's division'in a time a 23:58.37 fpr the 8.5km race. On Sunday, Bryon held on a won the overall pursuit 15km race.

Andrea won the 5km women's individual race on Saturday in a time of 17:08.43 at the first OUA qualifier of the season in Collingwood. On Sunday, in the in the 10km skate race, Andrea extended her lead and won the overall pursuit race for university women. 'OUA Athlete of the Week





The Raptors' secret weapon: losing Vince Vince stops whining, even though Raptors are headed for playoffs and Nets are in. the basement

If the new Toronto RaptO'rs have taught us anything, it's that whiny, prima donna athletes sometimes know best. After Toronto forward and whiner-extraordinrure Vince Carter temper-tantrumed his way out of the city, it has been nowhere but up for his former club. But while the trade has done nothing but good for the now-surging Raptors, Carter's actions in the months路preceding die deal did nothing but cement his place as the whiniest player in the NBA. Now, choosing the whiniest player in the NBA is as tough as picking the hottest girlin Alaxinl. But Carter is so adept at the art of the hissy fit, that he should get an award. Presenter and Sopranos star James Gando(fini:5' .. .and theNBA's 'Town Ciie~' award goes to ... (drum roll) ... Vince Carter!" Vince Carter: "Aw, dawg! Thanks

J ames. Well, this is truly an honour. I want to thank my momma for never teaching me selflessness, and I reallywanna thank my college coach, Dean Smith, for never benching me for missing class. Thanks again for this prestigious award. Go Tar Heels!" Carter had been kickingandscreamingfor. years in T.O., going so far as to try and influence whom the Raptors hired as their general manager and head coach last spring. And when the team's new personnel didn't meet with Vince's high standards, he started demanding to be let out. So on December 17, Vince fInally got his wish - the Raptors shipped the diaper-wearing locker room cancer to the NewJersey Nets. Vince still found himself on a miserable team - the Nets are an Atlantic division worst: 13-24 as of January 19. But to Vince, winning matters as much as Britney Spears' voice - his team may suck, but he's now in a major American

market with all the endorsements and other selfIsh opportunities he could ever desire. For the

hand, the Carter trade has been the medicationforthe virus that

IIsed to be the most popular player in

team history. The Dinos are 8-6 as of last Wednesday since the deal and, for the fIrst time since their unexpected run in the 2001 playoffs, they are actually playing team-oriented basketball. There are no worries about slacker-itis - the unfortunate disease that Carter inflicted on the entire organization (shortly after the trade, Carter admitted to prolonged periods of coasting during his fInal months in Toronto). Now, the Raptors are simply shutting up and playing. Even pseudo-whinerJalen Rose is keeping his mouth shut these days. And it's not eveQ like the Raptors pulled offa great trade for Vince - actually, the return on Vince was exceptionally weak. The Raptors received big men Aaron Williams, Eric Williams and Alonzo Mourning - and ]\iourning, a star in the Clinton administration, has yet to play for Toronto due to injury. But the key to the deal was improving team chemistry, which Babcock did by signifIcantly minimizingToronto's CQ-Crybaby Quotient.

Trading Vince gave the leadership reigns to sophomore Chris -Bosh, who has done nothing but put up double-doubles since he became Toronto's primary weapon. Moms Peterson, long-since forgotten by Toronto hoops fans, has reemerged as an offensive threat. And point guard Rafer Alston has been racking up the assists since he has been passing the ball to teammates who actually care about putting it in the basket. The'Raptors are even knocking on the路 door of the postseason - a prospect that is much more realistic now that the Raps have exorcised their Nike-pimping demon. Carter inflicted more pain on the city ofToronto than he experienced during his seemingly endless amounts of ankle and knee sprains. But minus Vince, the Raptors have become a team without a superstar, as opposed to what they used to be -;- a team coexisting with a superstar. Now Vince is in NewJersey and the new Raptors are on the road to the playoffs. And all it took was a little request to be granted.

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Injuries: Warriors play Sign-ups still open for through the pain Continued from page 27

Coach Kieswetterwas quick to point out that despite the injuries the team has dealtwith,none of them have been too serious. "Good players can play hurt. There's a difference to being hurt and being injured. It's a test, ameasureofthequalityoftheplayer-howwell can he play when he's hurt," noted Kieswetter. The Warriors' final game of the week had the OUA West's second-to-last-place team, the Windsor Lancers, visit the PAC gymnasium. The Warriors took it to Windsor in the game defeating them by a score of 65-50 in a game which was never close. The Warriors werevery successful in spreading the ball around throughout the game. Leadingthe Warriors to the victory was a once-againhealthy Graham Jarman, who added seven as;sists to his team-leading thirteen points. Despite their success on the week, the Warriors still dropped down from fifth to sixth in the as national ranking. The rankings, which came out prior to the Warriors defeatofWindsor, are determined bya pollofbasketballcoaches across the country.

squash and eight-ball pool league sign-ups end Friday,January 25.

Interestingly, the Warriors still remain at the top of the OUA East, ahead of the BrockBadg- " ers, who despite their second place status in the OUAEastaretankedhighernationallythanthe Warriors. The Warriors remain at home for their next game as crosstown rivals the Wilfrid Laurier . Golden Hawks visitthe PAC on Saturday,]anu- Dan Micak ary 22 at 3:00 p.m. The game, coupled with the IMPAINTSTAFF women's game against Laurier which starts at l:00ptn,is being touted as FantasticAlumruand Squash and pool sign-ups StaffDay and willinclude contests and prizes for those in attendance. While sign-ups fo!' many Campus RecreatiQn The Hawks, who sat at 7-5 on the season as leagues were closedafterthe firstweek ofclasses ofJanuary 19, are not to be takenlighdy as they for the winter tettn, those for both the Black will most certainly get a boost with the return of Knight Squash League and the Ejght-ball Pool guard Omar Miles who took last term off As League are still open. coach Kieswetter was quick to point out, Sign-up for the Black Knight Squash League "LLaurier's] recordisnotindicativeofhowgood is done .individually with teamS assigned afterthey are. , wards based on skill level. ''There's a lot to be said about the Battle of The cost for the eight-week league. which Wate!'loo. There's a certain satisfacttonin being .includes a two-weekplayofftournament,is $35. able to beat your cross-town rival. There's very Youcan sign-up atthe PAC athletics office until little that needs to be said in terms of motivaFeb.ruary1. tion." The eight-ball pool league also runs for eight weeks and the cost to sign-up is $30. . Each week, everyparticipantwill play against twodiffetentpeoplewithallgamestakingplace at Dooly's in Waterloo. A final tournament will be held at the end of the term with food and prizes" Eight-ball pool

Campus Rec offers free fitnass fun

Wednesday, Feb.ruary 16, from 5:30 until 6:30, Campqs will be hosting Fitness Explosion, an eveningoffree fitness fun including CardioCrunch, 1NT,TKO, Hip Hop and Kick it! atthe CIF Gyms. The eveningwillalso feature the chance to win Campus Recreation prizes. Take me to the Pilates On Saturday, January 29, Campus Rec is hostingaworkshopwhich willteach thefivebasic principles to Pilates-based exercises. Costis $15 andtheworkshop runs from 1O:OOto 11:30a.m; Sign-ups end January 25. Break a leg OnTuesday,January25,Campus Recis offering a workshop, the purpose of which they describe as introducing "the art ofb-boyinglbgirIingfromthegroundup". No previous experienceis required as the break dance workshop is aimed at the beginner to intermediate level. The cost is $15 and the workshop will run from 6:30 to 9:30 p.m.

-withJiles from CampllS Rec

3 Months for

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Ahuge seIedioe of fitness equipment that is sdenlifi· tally seIeded to he right for you. Our unique patented Fit-Rx program am pnMde amazing resuhs in 20 minutes. AworfII leader ill aD Iypes of fitness dosses, many of whim ore exdusive to GoodUfe, for all lev., safe and fUnl A$ we grow from 100 to 200 dubs aaoss Canada we ore 180% mmmilted to your fitness and heohh.

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Warriors guard Matt Kieswetter attempts a three-pointer against the Windsor Lancers on Wednesday, January 19. The Warriors took the game by a score of 6550 and KiesWetter had seven points in the game.

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lodic songs lie darker points that the band tries to present to the listener. One of the standout tracks on Set Yoursc!! 011 Fire, "He lied...