2003-04_v26,n33_Imprint

Page 1

Down to business

Don Bob Barker

Price is Right rez-style —page 13

UW gets top awards —page 4

Somebody out there loves us

DURSHAN GANTHAN

The side of the MC building was one of several locations on campus which were found to have been vandalized on the morning of Friday, March 26. Durshan Ganthan IMPRINT STAFF

This past weekend saw a rash of crime occur across campus. On a gloomy Friday morning, UW students awoke to find numerous statements spraypainted in black paint across campus. Five instances of graffiti littered campus, spreading from the PAS to the MC. On Saturday afternoon, an

ASU executive member arrived in the ASU office, only to find their safe broken into. Graffiti found across campus Staff Sgt. Wayne Shortt of UW Campus Police informed Imprint that they were notified on the morning of Friday, March 26, of an instance of graffiti on the MC’s south-facing wall

that said, “Justice will be done.” Further patrols of campus revealed that this was not an isolated event. “Fear is the greatest incapacitator” was scrawled on a sidewalk between Engineering 2 and Engineering 3; “Fuck Waterloo” was seen inside RCH 307; “Kuato lives” was left on the north-facing wall of AL; and “B.S. department” was found on one of the PAS signs by the building.

“The matter is being taken seriously and being investigated thoroughly,” Shortt explained. “If a person gets enjoyment out of that sort of thing, pretty soon they’ll be found with a black fingertip.” Students on campus were not impressed with the vandalism. “It seemed so pointless, becuase it didn’t really say anything,” said Kellie Superina, a first-year biochemistry stu-

dent. “It was almost pathetic. Why would anybody waste their time doing that?” This was a common sentiment from students on campus. “There are better ways to express your discontent,” said second-year arts student Jen, who did not want to give her last name. See VANDALISM, page 6

UW athletics dumps men’s volleyball coach Players react to Doug Hanes’ contract not being renewed after leading team to seven straight playoff appearances Rod McLachlan IMPRINT STAFF

Few UW coaches will admit it but there comes a time in each coach’s career when it’s time to step down and let go of the reins. However, for hardworking UW men’s volleyball coach Doug Hanes, who has coached his team into the playoffs for seven consecutive seasons, that time seems to have come prematurely and without much explanation at the hands of his employer, UW Athletics. In a statement to Imprint, UW Director of Athletics and Recreational Services Judy McCrae refused to dis-

cuss the terms of coach Hanes’ contract citing confidentiality concerns. However, McCrae did have this to say about discussing coach contracts, “these [contracts with coaches] are confidential and they would not want me to [divulge information]. “Having said that, I am prepared to tell you that this is a team that needs a change and new leadership. We need a fresh approach. I am upgrading the position and the terms of the position and now seems like a good time to create that new approach,” said McCrae. However, the whole decision to axe Hanes’ coaching contract has left a number of his players wondering why

such a move would be made now considering he has a 59-50 lifetime coaching record at UW and has led his team all the way to the OUA West finals in two of the past four seasons in the highly competitive OUA league. “I feel — and so do the other guys on the team that I have talked to — that the athletics department should have renewed his contract. It is kind of a slap in the face for a guy who has never missed the playoffs,” said Hanes’ assistant coach Chris Steingart. “When Doug began, Waterloo was not even on the recruiting radar for volleyball, but slowly over the years, Doug continued to bring the team

along and recruit better players, lead“I enjoyed my four years playing ing up to last year’s recruiting class — under Doug Hanes immensely,” said probably UW’s best ever. Unfortu- Fuchs. “I felt that we were moderately nately, because successful over a Doug is leaving, “In my opinion they long period of he will not be time and with around to coach could hire anybody — many different the talented crop to Judy [McCrae] could players, of volleyballers Doug’s credit. do it — and they will However, the who we have coming in this athletics departwin, but the credit coming year — a ment obviously will all be Doug’s in felt that a new group which promises to be coach might be my opinion.” even better than able to help our — Chris Steingart program imlast year’s rookies,” added assistant coach, men’s volleyball prove so that we Steingart. can compete on Team captain Brian Fuchs is keep- a national level.” ing an open mind about the prospect See CONTRACT, page 24 of a new coach leading the team.


page two

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

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Neal Moogk-Soulis

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CROSSWORD

What is your most clever MSN nickname? by Julian Apong and Dan Micak

“’Chalk that one up as a victory’ or ‘I hate chemistry.’ One or the other.” Emeka Ukwuoma

“I told a don to f. off.” Sal Faieta 1B geography

1B kinesiology

March 26 solution

“Just call me Lucifer.” Brandie Bevis 3B ahs

“I will never get into Waterloo.” Aly Harji 1B rec and leisure

U V U L A E

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R A T E II LL E B LL A A B

“I’m not against half-naked girls... not as often as I’d like to be.” Trevor Derreck

“Hotty potty.” Julie Potter 2B sociology

1B arts and business

“S & M or MSN?” Kelly McNulty 3B arts

“Angel-headed hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of the night” Lee Bowman 2A bioinformatics

O A L R I E S S B O I E C D I A G A N E L Y H I M O L O W I O U S S U M E E M

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Across 1. Bestow in 6. Be discharged suddenly 11. Yellow in New York, black in London 14. How to tell it’s a bad apartment 15. Common subject of a protractor 16. Spanish exclamation 17. An amoeba’s makeup 19. Your eternal occupation until you die 20. Greek woman—bad hair 21. Hypothalamus 23. A potato chip brand 25. Smoothly and flatteringly 26. Humpbacks have one on their back 31. A rent in your clothing 32. The actress-cum-shoplifter 33. Hangs around the dump 37. You’ve got at most two 39. ET’s ride home 40. Eagle’s nest 41. Medical prescription 42. Poetic skies 44. Where the prices keep going up and up 45. The Lord’s Prayer said repeatedly 49. Lead sulphide 52. Ski-lift 53. Extreme greeds 56. What the captain likes to hear 60. A container 61. For some couples, the worst part of marriage 63. French lake B A N G E R

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64. At full speed 65. 20 people in a room 66. Halfway between east and northeast 67. Rabbit food with an olive oil dressing 68. At that moment, repeatedly Down 1. Starch of the cuckoopint root 2. The number of JFK gunmen? 3. Having received some Friday night action 4. Mysterious supernatural forces 5. Libraries should have a few of these 6. Classy Calamity Jane 7. A large burden 8. Look with lustful intentions 9. A small stoppered bottle 10. Containing iron 11. Central American coon cat 12. The second brightest star in Perseus 13. Typical engineer smell, Go EOT! 18. A British rest area 22. A mournful poem 24. Students shouldn’t do this to profs 26. A pointed instrustment, lately electrified

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27. Enrique Iglesias among friends? 28. An extensive musical work 29. Consult (with ‘to’) 30. A Shakespearean imperative dismissal 34. A strong restless desire 35. Half of a Jim Carrey morality tale 36. A negative comparative 38. A social pariah 40. An arts student at the end of term 43. Relating to a lobe 46. Jung’s inner selves in touch with the unconscious 47. Washington metropolis 48. Seige fortification 49. L.M. Montgomery favoured hers in green 50. The latest flu 51. A knight’s long shaft 54. And others et cetera et cetera 55. One of the main Islamic faiths 57. Healing plant 58. A tall tale 59. Lambchop and Dolly 62. For us, April 30 nmoogksoulis@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


NEWS FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004 FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Imprint news news@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

3

All Fed up

Execs on their way out — page 5

The essence of experiencing exile Bianca Tong IMPRINT STAFF

Mark Stratford

Defenseless. Unsure. Helpless. Insecure. These words described the “In Exile” refugee experience held last Saturday, March 27, which subjected students and local residents to a glimpse of the harsh lifestyle a refugee leads, complete with land mines, rebel attacks, and corrupt border guards. The event was organized by the Waterloo Christian Fellowship, with guidance from the Mennonite Central Committee. About 30 participants endured a 16-hour ordeal, which started with a briefing at the SLC and ended up at Hidden Acres Mennonite Camp. The group was made to imagine they were citizens of a country split by its religious differences into north and south. They also had roles to play, including displaced children, teenagers and parents. Crouched in the aisles of a school bus that dropped them 45 minutes away, the group was put through a gruelling series of inspections by “border guards” clad in fatigues and carrying fake machine guns. They were ordered to lie face down on the wet, snowy ground and had valuables confiscated, all the while being yelled at in a foreign language. Many refugees ended up bribing guards with their meagre possessions in order to ease the almost ceaseless beratement. After a long trek fraught with rebel attacks, and several refugees getting abducted, the group proceeded through a “mine field” to the refugee camp with aid from a local citizen. Keira Periera was one person who partook in the experience. “We had to fill out refugee registration forms once we arrived at the camp, which was hard because they were all in French and we

IMPRINT STAFF

Universities/Colleges

If there are any business students at UW unsure of what to do after graduation, Swift Trade has a proposition for you. Swift Trade, Canada’s leading proprietary trading firm, is currently opening six new branches across Canada and they are looking for university and college graduates to participate in their proprietary trading program.

Ryerson University has launched the Laughter Club, a student organization devoted entirely to, in the words of club president Amar Thiara, “brightening up the world one laugh at a time.” Thiara says the club will use harmless stunts and practical jokes to muster laughs out of students and staff. The stunts, of course, began on April Fool’s Day.

COURTESY OF MENNONITE CENTRAL COMMITTEE

had no idea what we were writing.” In real life, few refugees actually stand a chance of being granted refugee status in a host country. Another sentiment that echoed throughout the day was a sense of helplessness, a sense of no control over the situation. “You had no say in anything, and couldn’t communicate with anybody,” lamented Periera. Refugees often face these language barriers, leaving them in a constant state of confusion and frustration. At the camp, the group was allowed to eat, but only according to the typical ration a refugee

usually receives: a styrofoam cup of rice and lentils. A Ziploc bag of rice would normally feed a refugee for a day; however, often times it must be stretched to supply a family of four for a week. Pereira remarked on the sense of understanding she gained from the experience, and how much more she appreciates the lifestyle of a person in exile. “One day is enough to endure, but I don’t know if I could handle this everyday, with real guns pointed at my head. I never realized how much we take for granted.”

Proprietary traders are employees of the company who trade house accounts, meaning that they trade with the company’s money rather than their own. They earn a base salary and commission based on the profits they are able to generate through their savvy trading skills. Swift Trade is looking for young post-secondary graduates all across Canada to become their latest success stories. “The ideal trader is someone with the ability to see trends in buying and selling,” said Peter

Canada •

Ontario’s Liberal government announced this week that they will use a new assistance plan to try and ease citizens into the province’s slight increase in hydro rates. $2 million will be set aside to offer one-time financial aid to low-income consumers who have been cut off for non-payment. The government has also set aside $10 million to be used to give tenants who fall behind on their rent one-time assistance to avoid eviction, as long as it is due to an unforeseen circumstance.

A 60-year-old man in Saskatoon pleaded guilty to mischief in provincial court after he was caught splashing a jug full of urine on his neighbour’s garage door. Robert Kukura was captured on tape performing the foul deed after his neighbours noticed a recurring stench on their property and rented a security camera to catch the culprit. Kukura has been sentenced to one year’s probation; he must also pay to have the couple’s garage door replaced.

btong@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Trading firm is looking for UW graduates for exciting business venture IMPRINT STAFF

Students at British Columbia’s Okanagan University College are reeling from an announcement the provincial government made on March 17. The school will be split in two, making room for an estimated 5,500 new post-secondary students, but the Okanagan student union is worried that this change will cost them sufficient student representation or introduce new requirements unattainable to students halfway through their programs.

In an exercise very similar to the one pictured above, students and local residents were held at gunpoint by rebels in the “In Exile” refugee experience held last weekend at Hidden Acres Mennonite Camp.

Care to make a Swift Trade? Mark Stratford

Beck, president of Swift Trade. “You don’t need a finance or accounting degree to do this, just discipline and the ability to react quickly. “Individuals use the firm’s capital rather than their own money, so they are more comfortable to try trading,” he continued. “If they are successful and make profit, they are hired as equity traders. They also get a portion of the profits that they make.” See TRADERS, page 6

International •

A Lithuanian court ruled on March 22 that Bertrand Cantat — lead singer of Noir Desir (“Black Desire”), one of France’s biggest rock bands — is guilty of manslaughter for killing his girlfriend, actor Marie Trintignant. Cantat, who admitted to assaulting Trintignant but called her death an accident, has been sentenced to eight years in prison. Trintignant was an acclaimed actor of more than 30 films; ironically, she often played mistreated women.

The Supreme Court of Japan has ruled that Japanese life insurance companies must make full payouts to families of policyholders who commit suicide, even if they solely and blatantly do it so their loved ones can collect the money. The Court ruled this week that six companies owe more than $20 million to the family of an elderly company president who jumped to his death in 1995. Japan, which has been in a recession for a decade, has seen their suicide rate rise 50 per cent since 1990. mstratford@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


Imprint news

4

UW rocks the business world Allison Mullin SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

The business world must have its eyes on UW. In the last two months, UW students have won two major competition awards for their innovative and unique business plans. A team of students representing the master of business, entrepreneurship and technology program (MBET) were awarded first place at the first ever Graduate Student Licensing Competition, a competition for graduate students interested in intellectual property and licensing issues. Sponsored by the Licensing Executives Society, a prestigious professional body that includes over 5,000 members in the U.S. and Canada, the team was chosen from graduate schools all over both countries to be one of three teams flown to San Francisco to present their plan in front of a panel of prominent judges, including Todd Dickinson, former under secretary of commerce and director of the US Patent and Trademark Office and Michael G. Lyons, prominent venture capitalist and Stanford University professor. Started by Prem Gururajan and Brian Pinchuk, Tangam Gaming Technology Inc. also includes members Harish Patel, Ethan Henry, and Joyce Kyeyune. The company introduced a patented automated system for monitoring gaming tables that could save casinos millions in cash by decreasing operating expenses, improving customer service and reducing fraud. The plans were judged on criteria such as licensing aspects, investment potential and overall quality. “It was an amazing trip,” said

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Merged mediation medley Fed Hall/Bomber agreements become one Christine Baker EDITOR -IN-CHIEF

ALLISON MULLIN

Luc d’Abadie holds up his magnificent Media Award. member Ethan Henry. “It gave us a great opportunity for networking and gaining credibility.” MBET is in its first year at UW and is bound for success. The program aims at the need for greater innovation in Canada by admitting students with a strong technological background and providing them with the business skills needed to push their initial ideas and innovations into successful commercial practices. The second winners were UW math and business student Luc d’Abadie and his partner, Andrew Hewitt, a student attending the University of Lethbridge. They were recently awarded the Media Award at the Queens Entrepreneurs’ Competition in Kingston, Canada’s leading business plan competition for undergraduate students. Teams from all over the world enter the competition to compete for various prizes. The plans are judged on various criteria, including feasibil-

ity, originality and finance. Focused Features, the business they originally began for an entrepreneurship course, offers to help students maximize their college experience by providing enlightened perspectives, life strategies and valuable resources throughout and after their university career. The business will focus around an impending book titled The Power of Focus for College Students that they will author, and will also include a Web site and speaking tour to a number of universities and colleges. The Power of Focus is an established brand of books by the publishers of Chicken Soup for the Soul, that also includes the title The Power of Focus for Women. “The book [is] about balancing your schoolwork, volunteer work and social life so you can really obtain a quality experience in and after school,” said d’Abadie. Look for their university tour in fall 2005.

Waterloo Co-operative Residence Inc.

Wish you could live in Residence Again? - Meal plans - Student community - Minutes from UW - Democratically controlled

4 month term On-site laundry Flexible move in/out On-site pub (Weavers' Arms) -

268 Phillip St. 884-3670 www.wcri.org Tours available upon request Celebrating 40 years of Co-operation (1964 - 2004)

Two new bar operation agreements are expected to be passed by the Feds board of directors within the next two weeks, replacing the existing mediation agreement and the older Fed Hall and Bomber agreements currently governing the on-campus bars. “It’s a renewal process really, bringing everything into one master set of documents,” said Feds president Chris Edey. According to Edey, the mediation agreement focuses more on governing the day-to-day operations of how the bars work, whereas the Bomber/ Fed Hall agreements cover the broader aspects, such as the insurance of the buildings, the responsibilities of each party and things pertaining to the actual physical structure of the buildings — things that are not covered in the mediation agreement. University administration and the Federation of Students are currently working to consolidate the agreements into one new agreement governing each bar. “We’re bringing the mediation agreement together with the existing legal agreement on Bomber and Feds, which are pretty old,” said Edey. According to Edey, dealing with each bar separately would be easier. “If a circumstance changes at one bar, it’s best that it is dealt with at one and not tied into the whole system.” Finance is another reason stated by Edey for the separate bar agree-

ments, as well as the fact that Fed Hall is an autonomous structure. The Feds and university administration have been exchanging ideas and drafts for four to six weeks. “This time frame doesn’t really reflect major differences in opinion, it just reflects that we’ve been really caught up in other things,” said Edey. “Certainly housing and CASA have kept me really busy. There really have not been any major conflicts or stumbling blocks.” For the Feds, this has been an opportunity to have questions regarding the 20-year old Bomber and Fed Hall agreements answered. “There were a lot of provisions in the original Fed Hall agreement that maybe when they were signed in 1984 they made perfect sense, but now looking at them 20 years later we are asking ‘why is this here, what does this mean?’,” said Edey. “The Bomber agreement and the Fed Hall agreement deal with a lot of issues about insurance coverage and liability.” The agreement is currently with the Feds’ lawyer and when the agreement is returned to them, Edey expects to proceed to the board for approval. According to the mediation agreement, it had to be done by the end of April; Edey expects to have the whole thing wrapped up, presented to the board and accepted by the board in the next two weeks. editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

DC library closed for facelift Nick Fergusi SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

The Davis Centre library will spend the spring term being renovated. Accordingly, the library will be out of service, officially closing on Friday, April 30 at 6 p.m. and reopening on Tuesday, September 7 at 8 a.m. The $5 million DC library makeover will include building the RBC Information Commons, wiring study tables for power and Internet access, adding a lounge on the main floor and installing a new glass entrance and exit that will allow more natural light into the library. University librarian Mark Haslett has promised to make the experience as hassle-free as possible. “We will do

all we can to minimize disruption to our students, faculty, and to Davis library staff,” he said. During the closure, the Dana Porter library will provide circulation, reference services and materials reserved for certain courses. Books or journal articles located exclusively in the DC library can be requested from Trellis and made available within one business day. Lack of study space is not expected to be a problem; there are over 1,100 study spaces in Dana Porter alone. More details on the closure and the renovations can be found at www.lib.uwaterloo.ca/ info_commons_dc/. The DC library will update this Web site regularly over the term.


Imprint news

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Farewell, sweet Feds

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A turbulent year will draw to a close next month for the current Feds exec: clockwise from top, president Chris Edey, VP internal John Fedy and VP education Liam McHughRussell. The Feds have been doing such a fantastic job recently, one would think they were really doing the job of four men. Oh, wait a second‌

Graduate students Sharing Discovery Shaun Slipetz SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

The fourth annual UW Graduate Student Research Conference took centre stage on campus this week, wrapping up today in the Davis Centre. The foyer in front of the library overflowed with excellently designed posters and oral presentations of many of the 193 submissions to this year’s conference. “The vision of the conference is to profile and promote excellence in graduate studies at Waterloo, to bring together graduate students from all disciplines and to encourage and foster interdisciplinary research,� said Penny Pudifin, co-chair of organization and sponsorship for the conference. “As a reflection of the broad and varying interests of our graduate students from all faculties, we have five research themes this year: environment, health research, information technology, materials and systems, and society and culture.� Sharing Discovery has become one of the largest conferences of its kind in Canada, with numerous on-campus and corporate donors such as Microsoft, Nortel Networks and RIM. The conference also featured numerous keynote speakers. Dominic Goodwill, a research scientist with Nortel Networks, discussed the integral role of technology in transforming communication networks. Later there was a panel representing the newly amalgamated Ontario Centres

SHAUN SLIPETZ

Civil engineering graduate student Sarah Dorner and co-organizer Penny Pudifin revel in revealing research. of Excellence, a government-affiliated organization which provides funding and industry connections to graduate students. The panel discussed the difficult transition from innovative research to the marketplace. The interdisciplinary focus of Sharing Discovery is one of necessity for research success. Participant Sarah Dorner made this clear by saying, “my research simply could not have been possible without the co-operation of different faculties and people. All the pieces really do come together at the end of your degree.� Dorner, a civil engineering student, combined forces with the department of biology at Laurier to research and present her interests in pathogen and

indicator levels in heavily impacted waters around the K-W area. When asked why other students on campus, particularly undergrads, should be interested in graduate student research, Dorner replied, “for those students who wish to pursue graduate research, it’s important to know what’s out there and what research is being done right here on campus. And for those students who want to head into the work force, the research at this conference can be brought into their fields with success.� For further information about the conference, including abstracts on all of the student submissions, check out www.grad.uwaterloo.ca.

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Imprint news

6

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Keep on building Sage departing words from Chen-Wing

Ryan Chen-Wing UWRYAN . COM

DURSHAN GANTHAN

RCH 307 bears evidence of the rash of graffiti that has been covering UW’s campus this week.

Vandalism: campus gets marked up Continued from cover

Some people even had advice for those who wish to graffiti on campus in the future. “People should learn the importance of chalk,” said Jim Tigwell, a key attendent at DC. “Chalk is the best graffiti medium, [because] then you don’t have janitors who need to wash it off.” Shortt noted that acts of vandalism have occurred on campus before and vandals have been caught. The most publicized act of vandalism in recent history occured nearly four years ago, when three drunken Warrior football players wreaked havoc on campus. Their antics in September 2000, in which they broke windows, lights and parking arms, caused damage worth roughly $10,000. In addition to legal ramifications, the players were suspended from the team for the rest of the year. Since this was “willful damage to property,” the person(s) responsible would face a charge of mischief under $5,000, which carries a maximum penalty of a jail term not exceeding two years; however, quite often a simple

fine is assessed, which includes restitution and a sentence for community service.

“It was almost pathetic. Why would anybody waste their time doing that?” — Kellie Superina first year biochemistry student

ASU office broken into After realizing that the office was broken into, the ASU executive members immediately contacted UW Campus Police and then contacted ASU vice-president Andrew Dilts. A digital camera worth $500 and an undetermined amount of money was stolen from the safe. The approximate value of the money is $1,000; however, since

some of those funds were in the form of cheques written for the Arts Graduation Ball, the ASU is unsure of exactly how much cash was taken. The Arts Graduation Ball will still proceed as planned, but will be funded by the ASU and possibly also the Federation of Students. Dilts explained that the forensics team from Waterloo Regional Police were sent to dust for fingerprints, but did not find any conclusive evidence. When questioned about whether extra security on campus is required, Shortt explained that current measures are fine, but that, “there’s a concern with high-traffic areas. “Buildings are open on a regular basis; the university is basically open 24/7.” Dilts sees a need for improved security for the ASU office, however. He noted that some possible solutions include bolting down the safe in the office (as the ES student society does), installing an alarm system and simply making more frequent deposits to the bank. dganthan@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

In the world there are builders, wreckers and neutrals. People in the first group create, build and continue endeavours as we progress in the world. The others detract, receive value or stand aside from the work of the first group. Those who wreck can only gain utility at the loss of others, but builders can create for the benefit of everyone. At the end of the term, the final of many terms, this may be the last thing I ever write for Imprint, and with it I want to encourage you to be a part of the first group, the builders. Whether you choose to involve yourself in student organizations at university, in public service at all levels or in non-governmental organizations; whether you work to help your family, your community, your nation or the world, you can find many worthwhile opportunities as a builder.

For egoists who believe they shouldn’t do anything except for themselves, you can find direct and indirect benefit. You can gain skills, influence and stimulation by creating and participating in endeavours. By contributing to furthering civilization, others will see the value in a situation of participation compared to the inferior way of working against ourselves and each other. The altruists do not need a reason. At UW, I have been lucky to be driven to contribute to the UW community and have received benefit from participating in various endeavours. They have provided me with a myriad of rich, wonderful and memorable experiences. Thanks to Randy Barkman, the founding editor of Imprint. Thanks to Sandy Atwal and Dave Fischer and all the good editors who followed them and with whom I have had the benefit of working. Thank you to all my colleagues in other organizations and in the university. To those who will come after me and continue to build in these endeavours, “Good on you.” rchen-wing@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Traders: business opportunity Continued from page 3

While Swift Trade welcomes students fresh out of school with very limited experience, they do not play with kid gloves. Traders trade on the US exchanges, particularly the Nasdaq since it offers larger stocks and higher profile. Employees are given strict and continual training in order to protect them from large losses. Luckily, this can equal smart trades and big payoffs. “On their first day on the floor they

may see themselves trading millions,” said Beck. The world of trading has a lot to offer business grads, but Beck strongly emphasized that it is “more than just a job. We have several guys here who are earning six figures after just six to twelve months on the job. It’s extremely exciting and very rewarding.” Go to www.swifttrade.com for more information. mstratford@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


OPINION

Imprint opinion

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Imprint is published by Imprint Publications Student Life Centre 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, ON N2L 3G1 opinion@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

And I still love them all Forgiveable personality quirks make a family

Christine Baker FACTS OF LIFE We’ve all got ‘em. They certainly aren’t all the same but they all share something in common. We’re stuck with them — like it or not. Crazy aunts, wild cousins, brothers we love to hate. It’s all about the history. You remember your grandparents from when they were younger and remembered you — and so you love them as they get older and less, um, not grumpy. Your family remembers you from when you were little and so forgive your many adolescent transgressions — mostly. It’s nice. But it also works the other way. So you convince your little sister to do your chores, get you snacks or hand over control of the TV from time to time and you are branded a manipulator for life — what are you going to do? Families are like that. They remember like no one else but are also willing to forget better than most people. Siblings are actually the best at that. There is no one else on earth that I can

go from an all out brawl about whose turn it is to take the car, to “hey, let’s get a Dairy Queen” in under 30 seconds, without any tension or hard feelings. Things always smooth over in a hurry. We share the same parents — that alone gives us plenty to talk about.

You convince yourself that you will overcome genetics and that you will not start talking to yourself as you look for a parking spot.

All that familiar love can bring out the worst in us. When one family member (who I am actually related to on both sides – dad’s brother married mom’s cousin – see, families are strange) stuck her hand in the un-carved Christmas turkey to help herself to some stuffing and announced “everything just tastes

better when someone else cooks it – even a hot dog,” it just added to her “unique persona.” I guess I should be happy that she feels comfortable enough around her family to stick her hand in a bird carcass, but really, we all thought it was strange. I guess the difference is that if she wasn’t family, I would have thought she was a freak. Or more of a freak. Most of us don’t want to be like our parents. There are things that they do that make you wonder just how exactly you turned out so well. You convince yourself that you will overcome genetics and that you will not start talking to yourself as you look for a parking spot. But just think back to the first time you did something that they did or said to you a million times and that you swore you would never do. Not a pretty sight. If it hasn’t happened yet, just hang on, it will. And it can be scary. You suddenly realize that this is all beyond your control and that some day, in some way, you will be like your parents. Just cross your fingers and hope that genetics treats you well and you get to hang on to the unfortunate ability to get drunk off one beer and not the tendancy to keep Kleenex up your sleeve. At least it’s cheap. editor@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Gabe Kempe

Vol. 26, No. 33

Student Life Centre 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, ON N2L 3G1

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If there’s one thing that unifies students in a collective furor, it’s the idea of deregulating university tuition fees. Recently, there has been consideration from the University of Waterloo’s administration to deregulate the Faculty of Mathematics’ actuarial science program. As a specialized profession, actuarial science may be inevitably drawn towards the same deregulation trends faced by similarly specific programs such as engineering, computer science, and accounting. The actuarial science program at the University of Waterloo provides its students with a foundation in economic risk; the ultimate objective is to achieve designation as a Fellow of the Society of Actuaries or Casualty Actuarial Society consequent to the successful completion of eight or nine professional exams. An early estimate suggests that, if deregulated, the program’s tuition would double to approximately $8,000 per year. The line of reasoning for those in favour of deregulation is that not only will it afford the university’s administration greater funds to invest in the quality of the actuarial science program, but it will also raise the stature of the program by aligning it with other distinguished deregulated programs. Another argument is that students graduating from actuarial science tend to, on average, realize higher earning potentials than those from non-professional programs and therefore have a greater ability to repay loans. Within the past year, actuarial science classes have seen unprecedented growth. Prof. Peter Wood, who is familiar with deregulation policy, says that with the increased admissions, there has been a palpable degradation of quality in the program. Although concerned about the impact of deregulation, he feels that there are not enough resources available to meet the needs of students enrolled in math programs and that there is an unmistakable need for additional fundtion without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA).

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Is deregulation inevitable? JEREMY LEE

IN SEARCH OF

Friday, April 2, 2004 —

7

ing. Actuarial science Prof. Mary Hardy also perceives a need more financial resources, citing excessive class sizes and a need for additional professors as problematic areas. There are pragmatic benefits to turning the actuarial science program into a deregulated one. With increased finances, the administration would be better equipped to manage an expensive and understaffed actuarial department in the face of inadequate government funding. Ideally, a deregulated actuarial science program would give professors more time to focus on nonteaching activities and thus become a breeding ground for innovative research. Many are wary of deregulation because it will give the university administration autocratic power to raise tuition fees without limit. Further, with increased tuition might come unreasonable expectations for higher salaries upon graduation. This palpable focus on money would inevitably take away from the objective of learning. However, the essential problem with deregulating the actuarial science program is that it creates lost opportunities for students from lower income families who cannot afford the steep tuition fees. Education should be accessible to all, not only the wealthy. Currently, Waterloo has one of the most esteemed actuarial science programs in North America. Increasing tuition costs would likely drive some of the best minds away from our program. Should deregulation be inescapable, however, the administration must be transparent and open about its allocation of funds. Not only must there be an increase in bursaries and a more efficient management of student aid, but it is also critical that the administration be held accountable for their spending policy, which must be consistently subject to scrutiny. The most important issue will be to determine whether the administration, after raising tuition fees, is in fact able to provide meaningful evidence of an increased quality of education. be libelous or in contravention with Imprint’s policies with respect to our code of ethics and journalistic standards. The first person to go to the Imprint office to talk with the editor-in-chief gets a prize. Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit and refuse advertising. Imprint Publications is not responsible for advertisng mistakes beyond the cost of the advertisement. One copy per customer. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Imprint CDN Pub Mail Product Sales Agreement no. 40065122. Next staff meetings: Friday, April 2 1:00 p.m., SLC 1116 Monday, May 3 12:30, SLC 1116 Next production night: Wednesday, May 5 5:30 p.m., SLC 1116


Imprint opinion

8

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Auto Insurance Time for public auto insurance CAITLIN CULL

The New Democratic Party, federally and in each of the provinces, is committed to reducing the cost of auto insurance in order to make it more affordable for all citizens. The cost has increased so much that many families can no longer pay to insure their vehicles. It currently costs thousands of dollars a year in Ontario to insure a single driver on one car and for many low-income families this is an expense that they cannot endure. All three of the major parties (NDP, Liberal and Conservative) have tried to regulate the private ownership of auto insurance in the province of Ontario. None of these attempts have been successful, which is why the NDP of today in all the provinces are committed to converting the ownership of auto insurance into the public sphere. In the past two years alone, auto insurance has increased by over 30 per cent. This rate is just too high for many individuals, who depend on the family car to drive to work, pick up children and run errands. Thousands of families in Ontario and even more across the country do not have the luxury of being able to fork over thousands of dollars for insurance plus maintenance and gas on their automobiles. This in turn effects the livelihood of this family; in many areas of our country there is no other option and cars are needed. Under the NDP’s plan, the public ownership will greatly improve the number of people who can afford their insurance and will also reduce the amount of the household budget

devoted to the insurance on the family car. Saskatchewan, Manitoba and British Columbia all have public, not-for-profit insurance and the rate of insurance has decreased by more than 20 per cent and has alleviated a large burden for citizens. For example a 22-year-old woman in Toronto who owns a 1990 Dodge Spirit pays $3,400 a year to insure that car, however an identical case in Vancouver would only cost $1,000 a year. The NDP guarantees that if insurance is transferred to public ownership it will reduce all rates by 20 per cent and in most cases even more than that. At this point all auto insurance companies are over charging the public and attempts to regulate haven’t worked. It is now out of control and it is time for the government to step in and take over the implementation to ensure equal distribution amongst citizens. The NDP also believes that if you strengthen the public transit system it can become a viable, environmentally sound and relatively cheap alternative to using one’s own car. However, in almost all cities in Canada, the public transit is too inadequate for it to be a real solution to the car. With financial support, our public transit and carpooling systems can be strengthened and Canadians can adopt a mentality on the subject similar to the Europeans and we can save our environment and money. Public auto insurance is key in Canada to reducing the class gap and making it equally accessible, but green solutions also need to be explored.

Private sector keeps prices low MIKE KERRIGAN

One of the first reactions people have to a perceived “market failure” is to demand that the government intervene to make everything right again. More often than not, the government intervention is worse than the original “failure” and the claims that a “market failure” exist are often based on a misunderstanding of the forces at work within the market rather than an actual failure. In the case of auto insurance, numerous interest groups have complained that our rates are too high and that the best solution is to have the government take over the sector and provide public insurance instead. One study that proponents of this view have relied heavily upon was produced by the Consumers’ Association of Canada. In it, the group attempts to compare rates in provinces with private auto insurance to those publicly insured. The study concludes that auto rates are substantially higher in provinces with private insurance; almost three times as much when comparing the least expensive publicly insured province to the most expense privately insured one. The problem with the results is that the study is based on a selective usage of auto insurance rates. When the study was redone using the actual amount paid in premiums in each province and taking into account public insurance subsidies, the publicly insured provinces were found to have rates about $200 higher. The cost of the insurance can also be buried in the deductible, publicly insured Saskatchewan and Manitoba have rela-

tively high minimum deductibles of $700 and $500 respectively. If the average cost of insurance is correct in the CAC’s study, Ontarians are paying more total dollars for their auto insurance than all of Canada combined — an impossible result. Time has shown that only the private sector can provide the innovation required to keep costs down and to reduce them over the long term. Across industries, companies try to undercut each other’s costs or provide better services for the same price to attract customers in a competitive environment. With almost 200 domestic and international insurance companies competing within Canada, the insurance industry is about as competitive as any industry can be. Much hullabaloo has been made about the “record profits” that the insurance industry recorded this past year, around $2.6 billion. This figure needs to be put in context. Firstly, this figure is for the industry as a whole — an industry that insures much more than just autos — so it doesn’t necessarily reflect inflated auto insurance premiums. Secondly, a single year’s figures don’t reflect the system as a whole. Insurers are anticipating much more in payouts in the future as Canada slowly becomes as litigious as American society. Additionally, a single terrorist attack can cost insurers hundreds of millions if not billions of dollars. Public insurance may seem like a solution, but we’ll end up paying for the full cost of insurance in the end anyway, either through unexpected fees or hidden tax subsidies.

Insurance rates are criminal MARK JOHNSON

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Auto insurance is an issue that hits home with most of us. No doubt many readers cursed and stomped when they received their last auto insurance bill. Adding to the fury is the recent news that the poor, suffering auto insurance industry made a paltry $2.6 billion last year in pure profit. Those corporate bastards sure have it rough, eh? What can be done about this outrageous injustice? The Liberal Party of Ontario is determined to reduce premiums for drivers. Within 15 minutes of taking office last October, they froze auto insurance rates. Now, some people came up to me when they renewed their insurance and the beginning of 2004 saying, “why did my insurance go up? I thought the rates were frozen!” It’s true, the rates were frozen, BUT they were frozen on October 23rd, and the previous Conservative government allowed the insurance companies to ram through massive increases to their base rates because they knew that the Liberals would halt any more increases should they win the election. Thankfully, the wild-spending, deficit-ballooning Tories have been ousted, but their insurance hikes remain with us to this day. What a legacy for Ernie! According to the Consumer Association of Canada, Ontario has the highest insurance rates in the country, and Toronto alone is 500 per cent above the national average! The Liberals are committed to taking action. During the election campaign, they promised to slash rates by 10 per cent within 90 days, and they have kept their promise. They have capped injury claims and made more insurance features optional. Unfortunately, most people’s bills have wound up higher — even with the 10 per cent cut — because of the huge hikes allowed under the Conservatives. There is division within the Liberal Party with

regard to how to handle this gouging. Along with several Liberal MPPs, I believe that the NDP is bang on when they describe the need for public auto insurance in this province. I’m the latest victim of the “they raised my bloody insurance for no reason!” club. As a 20year-old single male, I’ve been paying about $3,800 a year for my car insurance. A complex formula is used to calculate insurance rates and this renewal, I was due to lose a 20 per cent surcharge I’d been stuck with. So I received my insurance renewal, expecting a bill of roughly $3,200. And what do I find? It’s gone up 50 per cent, to $4,800 for a year, for no reason at all. This outrageous bill is now higher than that of my school tuition and it really stings. With the insurance freeze, at least it can’t go any higher. But how frustrating it is that the profitmad insurance companies purposely rammed through these massive increases before the freeze took effect! Then they have the gall to claim that their expenses and such forced the hikes! They did only make $2.6 billion last year; I suppose things were desperate—assholes! What a joke. I pay $4,800 a year for insurance in Ontario. If I lived in Manitoba, under their public auto insurance system, I’d be paying under $1,000 a year, and their system is still creating a surplus in funds! The insurance industry has been predicting that a switch to government-run insurance could put up to 5,600 people out of work. That sounds like a lot of jobs, but then again, Canada created 273, 000 jobs last year. I’m sure the losses will be absorbed. I don’t mind the higher gasoline costs we’re facing, because at least that sends a lot of taxes to pay for health care, education, etc. However, these greedy hikes on the part of the private auto insurance industry are blatantly gouging, and it’s time for the government to step in and halt this theft once and for all!


Imprint opinion

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Changing UW attitudes JOSH KOMENDA

UW students hold the most important responsibility of any group on campus. All 22,000 of us are the voice of UW and hold the key to its success and future growth. I believe that the following message holds value for all UW students: a positive and inspiring attitude is infectious. It’s time to ask yourself if you are a positive and contributing member of this community. It’s not perfect — UW’s still young and there are things to work on. Tell your professors and administrators how they can improve, but don’t get hung up on small things. See the bigger picture. We need all 22,000 students to tell the world what UW is all about. UW is one of the most remarkable institutions in the world. We’re only 47 years old, yet our co-op students and graduates outperform their counterparts from schools that are centuries old. We are incredibly diverse – politically, socially, religiously, and ethnically. Simultaneously, however, we share some very important qualities: We are committed to academic excellence, we are competitive, we don’t give up, and we’re entrepreneurial. The desire to find a better way runs through our veins. The scary thing is I think it’s possible to graduate and not even realize what an amazing place this is. When students attend a rigorous and competitive institution, the pressure to achieve is tremendous. Add co-op, papers, projects, and exams, and it’s not surprising that sometimes it’s

hard to see the light of day. That’s why it’s so important for all of us to consider the following thoughts. UW is about achievement through methods never before pursued. It is shaping the way you analyze, your outlook, your network, and your future. People look to UW as a source for leaders because of our philosophy: entrepreneurship is paramount. Understand what that means. We will be engineers who conceive innovative products and infrastructure, politicians who inspire and lead Canadians like never before, architects who change the way people think

The degree that will hang on your wall for the rest of your carreer will say “University of Waterloo.� It’s who you are. about spaces, humanitarians who invent efficient ways of helping, optometrists who find more effective ways correcting vision, CEOs who build responsible and productive corporations. We will improve the lives of citizens of the world by using our vision to identify and try things that others can’t or won’t. UW is for life. Get to know yourself, your peers, your school, and your new philosophy. Grades are important, but remember that higher education

is learning more than what you can learn from just the classroom. After graduation, you will not remember your grades as much as your relationships and growth as an individual, and a professional. Those who have the most positive experiences at UW are those who get involved, despite their workload. Join a club, a varsity or intramural sports team, volunteer with Feds, go to a basketball game — build your network. If there’s nothing that suits your interest then start something — there’s 22,000 other potential members. Understand the worth of each academic endeavor on campus and the value of diversity in education and networks. Once you realize that UW is more than a sum of its faculties, you’ll begin to understand the bigger picture. UW is entering a new era. Today, institutions that are hundreds of years old are breaking from entrenched foundations to build co-op programs and follow in UW’s footsteps – unfortunately; they’re half a century behind. That’s the power of true innovation. Look back with admiration at UW’s accomplishments, but also look forward. Our job is to make sure that UW continues to grow in reputation — globally. A stronger reputation will attract even higher-quality students and faculty, and funding to continue its only true tradition — enhancing the environment for innovation. The degree that will hang on your wall for the rest of your career will say “University of Waterloo.� It’s who you are. Don’t lament the fact that we’re not 200 years old. Instead, recognize the opportunity. It’s one thing to attend one of the world’s most prestigious universities. It’s another thing to build one.

Undefeated says goodbye Aaron Cowan UNDEFEATED I never thought that I would see the day when Undefeated would come to an end. While I have been writing for Imprint for two years, my plans for this column were actually born in the autumn of 1999. At that time I was a first year student living at St.Jerome’s. Nervous about being away from home for the first time, I did my best to make as many friends as I could, as quickly as I could. Thankfully I had no problem making new friends, but what I did seem to have a problem with was being honest about who I was to the people that I was becoming close with, as well as to myself. At breakfast one morning I opened the Imprint and came across Nigel Flear’s column Outlook. I was flabbergasted! I couldn’t believe that someone had the courage to discuss their sexuality in such a public forum. From that point on every week I secretly read

Outlook, quickly shifting my gaze to another article if a passer-by became interested in what I was reading. (I could not risk being caught reading the gay column — what would people think?) Through Outlook I learned more about myself, my sexuality and about the community to which I secretly belonged. Over time I became so empowered by Flear’s column that I eventually made a promise to myself that one day I too would become the writer of Imprint’s gay issues column. It was both my interest in writing as well as my need to be more secure with my sexuality that fueled my future plan. Ultimately I pictured myself in the future as a gay man who felt so secure with himself that he would not flee from an opportunity to make his opinions known. I wanted to show that I was proud of my uniqueness, instead of afraid of it. Two years later I feel the same way. While I know that throughout my time as a columnist I have excelled in making positive changes in my own life as well as the lives of others, I feel that I still have a long way to go in my mission to become a better person. Of course this is a mission that possesses no finishing line.

Undefeated has been about gay issues, yes, but my column has also been about tolerance, respect and the quest for betterment. Through Undefeated I have attempted to communicate my societal needs; to make those needs known. Through Undefeated we should see that we cannot afford to crumble under inequality or intolerance. Instead we must allow those things to empower us and make us stronger. If we can do that then we can never lose, we are always undefeated. To all of you who have taken the initiative to share your opinion of my column, I thank you. This is a sad goodbye for me, but know that while I will no longer be writing for Imprint I will be continuing my advocacy for gay rights, in as many forums as I can. I invite you all to do the same. I cannot fully emphasize the importance of a column like Undefeated in a student newspaper. I know that there is someone out there, right now, who is reading this and feels the same way that I did way back in the autumn of 1999. The opportunity is open, so take it. Goodbye my friends, and thank you for eyes and ears. Aaron out. acowan@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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Imprint opinion

10

Save the sweatshops Mike Kerrigan SOBER THOUGHTS Since this is my last column. I might as well go out with a bang and cause the last few supportive readers to question my sanity. I believe that third world factories, commonly known as “sweatshops”, are beneficial to those countries that host them and to the people who work in them. In fact, I believe that the movement to end all sweatshop labour is hopelessly misguided and contributes to the impoverishment of the developing world. No one would argue that the working hours, pay or conditions in “sweatshops” are close to what we would desire in a similar factory in Canada, but the question isn’t whether we would like to work in those factories, it’s whether people in the developing world feel the jobs are worthwhile. The answer is overwhelmingly yes. Jobs working for multinationals like Nike are some of the most coveted positions in developing nations. It may seem perverse that people would want jobs that we view as so undesirable, but only if we look at their situation from the perspective of someone already within a wealthy nation where few needs go unmet. In countries like Cambodia, Laos and the Philippines, a job working for a multinational is an opportunity to get away from subsistence agriculture. Ironically, for many people a “sweatshop” may be the first indoor, air-conditioned environment that the people have ever worked in. Their wages may seem paltry by our

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Stop barbaric sex games

standards, but multinationals pay on average between four and eight times the local wage. It is little wonder that people oftentimes line up for jobs before a new factory has even opened. That’s not to say that every factory in the developing world is uniformly positive in the contribution it makes. There are abuses of workers’ rights that do occur: people being denied bathroom breaks being locked in the factory — people that are denied pay or brought to work in indentured servitude and other terrible offenses. However, to single out the problem cases — which are in the vast minority — without recognizing the contribution multinational factories can make is disingenuous. Anti-sweatshop campaigns — though wellmeaning — can harm workers in developing countries. In one case in Bangladesh, a German garment maker came under so much public pressure that it laid off 50,000 child workers. Oxfam later did a study that found that thousands had to turn to lives of crime, prostitution or starved to death. In another, anti-sweatshop groups used the ‘98 World Cup as a forum to shine a spotlight on “sweatshop” labour used to create soccer balls in Pakistan. As a result Reebok, Nike and a number of other manufacturers pulled out of the country causing the medium family income to drop by 20 per cent. I dream of a future when no person has to work the long and gruelling hours demanded by a “sweatshop” but I know that no amount of voodoo economics can remove their necessity to the development of many poor countries. Anti-sweatshop activists can do good by pointing out the abuses that occur within some of these factories, but those that really care about the poor must recognize the critical role this higher-skilled labour plays in reducing poverty in the long term. mkerrigan@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

SOLOMEN UW MNGMNT SCIENCES

Michelle Titus TOUCHED There’s something about a guy in a position of power. These specimens seem to be my kryptonite; I’ve been involved with many — political boys, rich business boys, paramedic boys and boys with a ton of confidence and pull with important people. Another type in this category is the bartender and while they may be overlooked, it is undeniable. For if you have connections with him, your bar experience may be that much easier. In the past I have just shrugged off incidents where girls flaunt themselves for service gaining preferential treatment; I mean, I have thrown myself at firefighters before and no harm was done. It’s not like if I jump on his pole he’ll extinguish my house quicker. But in the case of a bartender there is a much thinner line, it is tempting to reward flirtation and tips with favouritism. This past weekend my eyes were opened to what can happen when a misuse of power occurs. On Friday night I hit up Revolution Nightclub with my visiting boy and a bunch of friends to celebrate a birthday. What was supposed to be a great night of drinking and dancing actually brought an insulting reality check. At first it was funny when I was served at the bar before my guy companions who had been waiting longer and were actually in front. But when they waited for at least an hour the next time while we all danced; it seemed ridiculous. So, to prove their theory I was sought out and the next thing I knew, other guys who were there before me (as some verbalized) became nearly invisible. Of course frustrations built and the bartender assumingly not pleased with his power being questioned, motioned for his manager to “resolve” the situation (kick them out). With

UNDER THREAT

hopes for some clarification, I tracked the manager down to discuss my concerns. In a nut shell, I was treated as an intoxicated piece of scum whose observations were largely misconceived. Although, I was not intoxicated because my male friends at the bar were being blatantly overlooked for women. Insulted and upset I left the bar too affected by the appalling treatment. Once home I dialled Revolution’s phone number and left an unimpressed message for owner Gary Stewart. After speaking with him I am confident that he does not endorse such dealings especially since it is hard to monitor. However, I only hope that this incident will make this issue more of a concern. Seeing girls vying for a bartender’s attention is not a new sight for me, but, I have never seen one so blatantly ignore other patrons. After fully digesting the event I realized what had happened — reverse sexism. Since sexism is largely attributed to female discrimination this term has been coined to convey the opposite. While this may seem like a harsh conclusion or a ludicrous one at that, it most definitely is not. It was apparent that many guys that night were being discriminated against due to their gender. While it may be amusing to flirt with bartenders and butt in line occasionally it becomes ignorant and annoying if females capitalize on such treatment. We fight for equal rights and then revert back to barbaric sex games to gain privileges. As humans we should respect each other as such and then maybe a more equal society will follow. As for bartenders, they cannot be solely blamed. It is also the patrons that utilize their weakness, the establishments uninterested in their practices and society’s neglect to recognize its prevalence. Thankfully, at our Bombshelter Pub incidents like these do not happen and I only hope that although the skin to clothing ratio seems to be increasing, this does not change. Heck, my sex column accompanied with picture is in the paper weekly and all I get is the bartender counting my hickeys! (I’ll miss you MN.) mtitus@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Julian Apong


Imprint opinion

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

A number one smash!

Screw exams — a rant for stress relief

Can K-W handle two types of karaoke?

Mark Stratford BIG EARS BURNING The exam crunch is back, but I’m not going to waste precious space writing about it. I’m sick of writing about stress, or more specifically, the stress of student life. I’d much rather write about overcoming the stress of student life. There’s got to be a solution for braving the storm without injury. Unfortunately, the answer doesn’t come easy, but give UW credit for trying. For example, WPIRG has spent the past couple months performing free seminars on the benefits of teamwork, cooperation and time management, all of which can potentially lead to smoother academic performances and less stress come exam time. Of course, if I could get along with people and stick to a schedule well enough to attend those kinds of meetings, there’d be no point. So thanks, student reps, but methinks the answer lies somewhere off campus. I think it finally dawned on me last week, and it’s all thanks to karaoke. Last Friday, I blazed through one of my favourite Michael Jackson chestnuts on stage at the Silver Spur — I even maintained the falsetto! — and realized as I stumbled back to my posse just how relaxed the past five minutes alone had made me. As anyone who has ever done karaoke can tell you, it’s phenomenal. Everyone is drunkardly cheering you on, no matter how badly you butcher the song, and even the slightest bit of funk or soul in your voice automatically makes you worlds better than those starry-eyed moppets on American Idol. And, as it turns out, embarrassing yourself in public is a powerful sedative. Then I remembered something I learned years ago: our concept of “karaoke� is totally different from what karaoke actually means in Japan. Japanese karaoke refers to the act of demolishing fragile objects in a secluded room by various means, including throwing, stomping and smashing with pipes, baseball bats or other blunt objects. This form of karaoke, a thriving business in its homeland, is revered for its stress-killing effects. Now here’s something we need in our society. We’re already allowed to

chase after our best friends and peg them in the ass with paintballs for an hourly fee, but for some reason nobody has come up with the simple yet genius idea of dropping some Dollarama wine glasses on the floor and letting someone else clean up the mess. As far as I’m concerned, Japanese karaoke is the ideal stress relief. You can exact your juvenile anger onto these items either by treating them as the material trinkets that they are, or by using your imagination; for example, they’re not marbles, they’re Dick Cheney’s testies! Pass the sledgehammer and look away, son. All I can say is that a Japanese karaoke bar would be quite prosperous in these parts. Picture it — you’re walking out of your last exam, and you know consciously that the pressure is off but it hasn’t quite sunk in yet. For those who don’t instinctively head to Louie’s, there would be no sweeter salvation than wrecking worthless junk for a while, then going home for a shower and nap. In fact, why stop there? How about a UW stress club, devoted to the pursuit of coming up with new forms of stress delineation for our hunchshouldered brethren? Then we could have our own mini variation of Japanese karaoke, with stress balls and Weeble Wobbles and, best of all, a room — most likely in the PAC — where students could pay out of their own pockets to smash their cares away for a good five or ten minute session. Would it be a stretch to add that this could be considered an alternative for students who can’t find a partner for racquetball? Oh, who cares, it’s still a booming venture waiting to happen. Of course, for an atmosphere of true stressed-out disillusionment, it might help to pad the walls of the room with white rubber and have it be monitored at all times by a staff of doctors with magical potions. But this is the PAC we’re talking about — there’s decorum to consider. Oh well, even if this never happens, at least we’re all resourceful enough to come up with our own ways to get through the most tumultuous, fanatical, thrilling period of our lives. And the next time you’re at a karaoke bar, throw yourself up there and sing, dammit! I love coming up with these ideas. It’s so much easier than coming up with actual ways to implement these ideas. Now that would be stressful.

11

Arda Ocal OUR HOUSE (Note: the opinions expressed are those of a stressed Arda and do not necessarily reflect a sane Arda.) I hate exams. They are just about the dumbest idea ever conceived, behind toe socks. Every term it’s the same thing — read, read, do problems, read — you cram everything into your head so that you can scrape a passing mark, then you forget everything the second you put your pen down. And what determines your grade in the course? Three hours of your life? The entire term, you slaved over assignments and papers, putting in countless hours of your life for about five per cent of your final grade and in the end it doesn’t matter, because the entire mark comes down to three hours in a huge ass gymnasium, where everybody feeds off of each other’s stress. God bless those wonderful

BAR FLIES

TA’s who give you a hassle if you forget your Watcard at home. Yes, caught me — I’m actually writing this exam for a friend of mine. He still owes me money so I’m failing this exam in his name to return the favour. And don’t forget those people that finish the exam in an hour. It really makes me feel better knowing that people found the exam a lot easier than I did. I just wanna kick them in the junk as they pass by my desk and smile. If that’s not bad enough, sometimes you don’t even get to exam topics in class. Some profs “run out of time� and make you “independently� read the last eight chapters, which will of course be on the final. And how about those lovely “midterms� that conveniently pop up a week or two before the exam? Why don’t you just rename them the “drown-the-student� test? Yeah right, “building character.� They build a multiple personality disorder, that’s what they do. And don’t even get me started on how all of your exams always seem to clump together. I’ll credit that to not having a horseshoe shoved up my ass. How lovely it is to study for exams, too. Just try and find a good place to

study at the Dana Porter, unless you wake up at 4 a.m. And what good does the library do, anyway. Most people go there like they’re dressed for the Bomber and try to pick up. Where the hell do you think you are buddy, a swingers party? Some people are trying to study here. And don’t even try to check a book out during exam time, unless you have 24 hour surveillance of the front desk, with someone giving you a green light by walkie talkie to run to the checkout counter — or else you might as well waste the whole day in line. There probably is a better grading solution out there, but of course, exams are easier to administer, so we’re doomed to write the damn things. Why can’t we just copy Laurier and have 30 per cent of our mark come from participation? You say a couple things in class (they don’t even have to make sense), the prof smiles at you and bada boom bada bing, you’re passing the course. Thanks to the 100 or so people who helped me write this column (and who currently share my frame of mind). I’m sure the rest of the school feels the same way that we do. aocal@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Ian Blechshmidt

mstratford@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Letters Culture of resistance To the editor, Philip Weiner’s editorial criticized SFPR for not having more displays promoting Palestinian culture, as the JSA and WIPAC had during Israel Week. In fact, numerous Palestinian cultural items were displayed including traditional dress, ornaments and other items. Moreover, an entire night, Layalee Falasteeniyeh (Palestinian Nights) on March 15, was devoted to celebrating Palestinian culture and folklore. Culture is defined as “the system of shared beliefs, values, customs, behaviours that the members of society use to cope with their world and with one another, and that are transmitted from generation to generation through learning.” Since 1948, the Palestinians have had a culture of resistance to Israeli expansion and occupation. Therefore, the conclusion that Palestine Week did not celebrate Palestinian culture is unfounded. Perhaps, instead of culture, Weiner meant scientific or technological accomplishments. Israel Week included displays promoting Israel’s achievements in technology, economy, and democracy. Why did Palestine Week not include similar displays? The reality is that the Israeli occupation is the central fact of life in Palestine. It affects everyone and everything; schools and universities are closed, hospitals shelled, ambulances fired on, roads closed, international aid restricted, curfews imposed, homes demolished, land confiscated, olive trees uprooted, and the list goes on. Facing these limitations, the Palestinian people cannot possibly develop industry, technology, democracy, or a self-sustaining economy comparable to that of Israel or other industrialized nations. In essence, Israel has effectively deprived the Palestinians of the same rights and opportunities that were celebrated during Israel Week. Our goal is to raise awareness among

l letters@imprint.uwaterloo.ca Canadians of the realities of the Israeli occupation, and we feel that Palestine Week accomplished that goal. As Bianca Tong and Mark Stratford acknowledged in their article last week, “Palestine Week served to display cultural aspects as well as to inform students of the elements of Palestinian life.” — Students for Palestinian Rights executive committee Activism vs. racism revisited To the editor, Anti-Semitism — as with any other form of racism — is a serious charge, not one to be made lightly. If the label “antiSemitic” is applied frivolously and repeatedly to a person or an organization, it devalues the seriousness of the allegation, which is why Students for Palestinian Rights is responding to Mathew Plant’s letter regarding the supposed racism of our organization and of Palestine Week, the event we held in the SLC from March 17th - 19th. Plant’s single piece of evidence of our anti-Semitism was that we played a video, entitled Jenin Jenin, in which a young Palestinian girl said “I wish the Jews could come live in our shoes for one day.” While we, living in Canada, can clearly recognize the distinction between Israelis and Jews, it is unreasonable to expect the same recognition from a young girl whose only experience with Israelis is through the Israel Defense Force, in which Arab Israelis are not allowed to serve. Furthermore, her statement is not racist; she is expressing her wish that Israelis could see the devastation of Palestinian society that is a direct result of the occupation, and a deliberate policy of the Israeli government. SFPR views the Israeli-Palestinian conflict as a conflict over land, not over religion. We feel that it is a matter of human rights and international law, not a matter of Muslims versus Jews. Many Jewish individuals and organizations

share our vision for peace. For instance, the group Jewish Youth Against the Occupation set up a booth in the Great Hall as part of Palestine Week. To compare our peaceful organization to the KKK is simply offensive, and brings us no closer to what we all want: a just solution to the conflict, one that is based on international law and that respects the human rights of everyone in the region, whether they are Israeli, Palestinian, Jewish, Muslim, or Christian. We agree with WIPAC that “blaming Israel = activism but blaming Jews = racism and here at UW we don’t tolerate racism.” However, here at UW we also don’t tolerate allegations of racism that are not backed up by facts. Free speech is a fundamental human right; we should let everyone express their own position and let the students draw their own conclusions. — Students for Palestinian Rights executive committee Useless computer store To the editor, I have recently gone through a rather hellish experience involving my computer and the store where I bought it: the Campus tech shop in the SLC. I was very disappointed by the poor and unsympathetic service I received. Firstly, I was quoted a price of $20 for a backup disk, which I was assured (more than once) would not increase. Ultimately, I ended up paying $55 for less than 1/8th of my files, burned to a disk that I received a week after giving them my computer. During this week I had to visit the store every day for a progress report, as my calls were not returned, and I was not informed otherwise. In the end my computer was not repaired, and I am now forced to bring it to another computer store. This repair will take another week. To top everything off, the cashier at tech shop informed me that it’s uncommon for a first year student to encounter

such a huge problem with their computer. Instead, it is more likely that one will experience a problem in second year. (oh God! I’m a rare case!) He then reminded me of my warranty, after all I had almost forgotten about it! (It has been eight months since I bought it.) He handed me a receipt after taking the last $55 in my account, and wished me “Better luck next year”. Thanks for nothing. — Erika Engel 1B Arts Down with ignorance To the editor, In her last article “Only as happy as your stomach”, Cari Mason claimed that nothing in Bamako should be capable of inspiring hunger. She was suggesting that the quality of meat in the city was so poor that she would not eat it. In fact, this may be the case as she saw it for the area she stayed in. Unless her statements are satirical in nature, her comments are considerably ignorant. For those of you who do not know, Bamako is an African city in the country of Mali and is also the largest city of that region. This developing nation is clearly burdened with economic hardships if the citizens living in the capital city are dwelling in poverty. For someone who was situated in a city like this, based on a volunteer position, it is completely mind-blowing that they would conceive the thought of their meals being served in a typical western fashion. Let’s get one thing straight about poverty, when you’re poor, you don’t have much and you especially appear to have nothing at all when compared to western culture. When you’re poor you make ends meet with what you have in any way you can do it even if that means cooking your dinner near open sewage. I went on to read the rest of the article in disgust and I continually failed to understand how some-

one can ridicule the living standards of a developing nation. If anything, she completely missed an opportunity to write a positive article raising awareness about this issue. I am no judge, teacher or a great advocate of any particular cause at this time but on the basic grounds of common sense, travelers should prepare themselves properly for where they are going. In all truth, if you plan on visiting or volunteering your services in a developing nation you can’t expect to live in the same living conditions as you are now. It is unfortunate that people have to live in Bamako under these circumstances but I also think it’s a shame that one can return from a place like this selfishly and ironically thinking about their own diet. — Caustan De Riggs 1B Environment and Business Tories are anti-everything To the editor, The Conservative Party of Canada really needs to get a life. They don’t seem to have any policy of their own; all they do is attack everything the Liberals do. Case-in-point: the recent budget. The Liberals sent $1 billion to help our cashstrapped farmers. The Tories whine that it isn’t enough. The Liberals continued their prudent course of paying down the national debt with the surplus. The Tories oppose the plan, whining that any surplus represents overtaxation. The Tories were against Kyoto; they’re against gun control; they were against the Liberals’ position opposing the petty invasion of Iraq. Perhaps the CPC should develop some stances of their own rather than being a bunch of grumps who are against anything and everything. Mark Johnson 2B Political Science

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FEATURES

Imprint features

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004 FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

15

The kind faces of Mali —page 14

features@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Come on down residence style Sarah Lau IMPRINT STAFF

Federation Hall and the University of Waterloo transformed into the new studio location for the game show The Price is Right this past Saturday, March 27, 2004. Hundreds of students came out to participate in The Price is Right: Residence Style in hopes of getting onto contestants’ row and winning a spot in the showcase showdown. The event was put on by UW Residence and Housing to raise money for the charity Breaking Bread for Women in Afghanistan. The idea was first proposed by Scott Mills, residence life coordinator and one of the many organizers of The Price is Right event. A friend of his at Lakehead University had held the event in the past. Scott thought that bringing The Price is Right to UW would be a great idea as well. Similar to The Price is Right on television, dons from various UW residences came together to recreate a giant money wheel and many of the games seen on the show such as Cliffhanger, Punch-a-Bunch, The Dice Game and even Plinko. Eight fortunate contestants called from the audience got to participate in these games

and try their luck at winning all the wonderful prizes that the coordinators had to offer. There were thousands of dollars in prize donations, including air and ground trips to a variety of places in Canada, free meal plan money, microwaves, bar fridges, memberships to workout facilities, gift baskets and gift certificates, MP3 players, coffee makers and more. A great deal of preparation went into putting this afternoon together, including the creation of games, finding the perfect “Bob Barker” (which ended up being Cameron Best, a don from Village 1) and getting prize donations from various businesses in Waterloo and Ontario. Some of the major sponsors for the event included Via Rail Canada, Can Jet Travel Cuts, UW Food Services, UW Bookstore, Housing and Residences, Goodlife Fitness, Curry in a Hurry, Molly Bloom’s and many others. For the students who participated in the event, a five-dollar ticket could have won them thousands of dollars worth in prizes. One such lucky person was Tyler Craig, a first-year engineering student living in North 5, Village 1, who ended up being the winner of the showcase showdown

at the end of the afternoon. “It didn’t really hit me until all my friends were joking around, asking if I would take them to Halifax with me. Even my don was asking me!” said Craig. Craig took home a truckload of prizes ranging from a return trip for two to one of several places on the Eastern coast of Canada, $1000 meal plan money on his WATCARD for next year, a free instructional program and locker rental at the PAC, a fire extinguisher and alarm, some Kraft Dinner, coffee, toilet paper and much, much more. “I had no idea what to say when they asked me [the price]. I looked to my residence friends for help. It must have been the greatest week ever, because we also won our residence hockey tournament that same week,” said Craig, smiling. The Price is Right: Residence Style was a huge success and revenue generated amounted to almost $1000. “The dons did a fabulous job. It was a lot of fun and it was for a worthy cause,” said Mills. He was definitely happy that the afternoon enjoyed such a great turnout and that all the students had a wonderful time.

COURTESY SCOTT MILLS

Contestants got a chance to spin the wheel with a little help from Cameron “Bob Barker” Best.

slau@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Finally, a Final Fantasy worth playing Tim Alamenciak IMPRINT STAFF

I had my doubts about a massively multi-player Final Fantasy, but then I got to thinking, it can’t be much worse than FFVIII — at least I hope it can’t. I mean seriously, I don’t know what they were thinking. I hope that whoever devised the awful, awful battle mechanics of FFVIII was canned, and the entire board who went along with his idea, also canned. But thankfully, FFXI is not a tragedy, instead it is glorious. The game makes up for the past few failures by

returning to the series’ original roots and excels in every aspect. The biggest change in the actual mechanics of the game is the re-introduction of the job system. Through this, you are given a great deal of control over the direction your character takes in the game. In the beginning, you choose between six different jobs, each sporting their own abilities. There is the traditional separation of magically and physically oriented jobs. You also have the ability to switch jobs during the game. To make your choice a little harder, FFXI has five races, each of which excel

at particular jobs. These you can’t change. The races range from the ultraphysical to the magical and vary in appearance drastically. The underlying story in the game is relatively simple and typical, yet still interesting. Essentially, there was this great evil and the people killed it, but not really, it was just sleeping. So now this evil is back and at the same time there is some strange civil war between the countries. The interesting sub-goal, next to your character’s development, is your nation’s development. One simply gets a spell cast on them by a guard before going in to the wild.

Every monster killed afterwards counts towards the nation’s score. The higher the nation’s score, the better its economy and the better the items and weapons available. Once you get into the game, things come fairly easily. I play the PS2 version, which, with the exception of controls, is exactly the same as the PC version. With other online games, the controls would be awkward at best, but FFXI’s intuitive interface makes it easy. Almost every action in the game can be done easily with the controller. Things such as chatting and performing special actions are difficult to do

with the controller, so a USB keyboard makes sense to have along. The game-world is absolutely massive. It is realistically decorated with hills, foliage and mountains. The graphics are the best I have ever seen on any massively multi-player game. There is only slight lag in areas with a large number of players. By far the biggest rave I have about this game is the fine, helpful attitude of the other players. In other online games, it’s common to find, well, assholes. And a lot of them. See FANTASY, page 14

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FANTASY: finally they got it right Continued from page 13

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Asking a simple question like “what’s the command for fishing?� can get you responses like “press ctrlalt-del� or “st00pid n00b.� Instead, when I asked how to fish, I had several people give me the right response. And when I was getting my ass handed to me by some mutated rabbit, a higher-level player stepped in and saved the day. This is definitely not a game that will sit on your shelf un-played after you get that level 89 ranger. Every path through the game is a different experience and there are plenty of paths. In addition to your main job, you can choose a sub-job to further enhance your character. There are six initial jobs, five races (thirty choices so far) and nine advanced jobs, making a total of 270 totally different character combinations. Also, the town you pledge allegiance to influences the missions and quests on which you embark. Not to mention the seemingly infinite amount of equipment and crafting skills. Oh, crafting! The heart and soul of every decent RPG. FFXI incorporates all the standard skills such as blacksmithing, cooking, fishing and

carpentry, while adding a few interesting ones such as weaver, bonework and fishing. There’s nothing I like more than taking a break from shitkicking a few incredibly large caterpillars and doing some fishing. The biggest concern I have with most m a s s i v e l y SCREENSHOT BY TIM ALAMENCIAK, COPYRIGHT SQUARESOFT multiplayer games is their lack of focus and direction. For on the manufacturer’s behalf, I would the most part, the goals of other games strongly recommend this game to anyconsist of going after some special body who is even remotely a fan of monster, beating it dead, getting some video games. And for those of you good item and repeating that end- who stopped paying attention to lessly. There’s really no drive, no story, Square-Enix after FFVIII, I’d just like and no focus to the game. FFXI excels to let you know that they’ve quit the in this category, too. There are numer- bullshit and made a good game. If you do decide to join the fray, ous quests to do that increase your fame in the world and yield some nice there’s a forum set up for UW FFXI items. Also, the player can do missions players at pub90.ezboard.com/ for their nation to both gain military bffxiuow. Now if you’ll excuse me, rank and advance their nation’s stand- these fish aren’t going to catch themselves. ing in the world. Although the pay-to-play option talamen@imprint.uwaterloo.ca was, in my opinion, not the best choice

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Children in Mali line up to have their pictures taken.

Cari Mason

12° NORTH As the car stops outside of the tall white-washed walls of a house, I wonder silently why we are here. Before I can ask I am inside the compound surrounded by a mÊlange of goats, dogs, chickens and children. Soon a woman appears to greet us

with a smile and a flurry of words in the local language of Bambara. Attempting to offer me some explanation, my boss, with whom I am supposed to be visiting our project partners, turns to me and says, “this is the woman who fed me for one year.� As he says this, she is in the process of feeding two of her youngest family members — one on each nipple — but I get the feeling this is not exactly what he meant. The next hour is spent discussing weather, family affairs and plans for the future. Feeling desperate to finish what we came to do — visit our asso-

CARI MASON

ciate schools in Kita — I can feel each tick of the second hand on my watch as the minutes pass. Tick tick tick. As with other elements of the project which have been delayed for similar activities, I worry that stopping here will mean other delays which, when combined, will eventually mean the inability to finish our project successfully. Tick tick tick. Finally, as if on cue, everybody stands up and we are escorted to the door. See FACES, page 15


Imprint features

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

15

FACES: Malians opening welcoming arms and hearts to everyone Continued from page 14

The RIM and Blackberry families of related marks, images and symbols are the exclusive properties and trademarks or registered trademarks of Research In Motion Limited – used by permission. ™Rogers, Rogers Wireless and the Mobius design are trademarks of Rogers Communications Inc. Used under License. ©2004 Rogers Wireless Inc. All rights reserved.

Walking towards the car, the visit is more thoroughly explained: “she would have been very angry with me if she heard I had passed through Kita without saying hello.” Doing business with a Malian can be challenging and by Western standards sometimes impossible, not because of incompetence but because of the inherently social nature of the people here. However, it’s because of this element in the people, and certainly not the hot and dusty climate, that makes Mali such a welcoming country to visit as a foreigner. Having been raised on generations of superstition, Malians are a mystical people. Family and friends are the only system of social infrastructure that is available to them and thus they treat those aspects of their life accordingly, demanding the same high level of fairness and generosity from those that

they meet as they themselves are willing to give. Unlike some other areas of Africa, like Senegal, which have been inundated with aid workers and tourists, Mali remains comparatively unscarred by foreign intrusion. Because of this, it is very rare to receive demands for presents as you often would elsewhere. Despite the obvious class difference between travelers and most locals, which makes adding a toubab tax (toubab = foreigner in Bambara) irresistible to the average vendor; foreigners are treated more as a novelty than a target. Walking down my street I must shake 20 tiny hands as little girls crowd around singing a chorus of “toubabou! toubabou! toubabou!” This will always be the case. No matter how long I stayed here in Bamako I would always be a toubab. There is no way to change the colour of my skin and

thus no way to avoid the predetermined ideas that people here will have about me, which right now remain quite benign. With the whole country on the verge of change, I worry that the way the locals view foreigners is about to shift as well. I worry that the Western ideals the people of Mali embrace so readily will corrupt and pervert the views of the locals here and that perhaps I will return in ten years time to hands that claw, pull and tear instead of those that reach out in friendship now. There is a Malian proverb that says: “Everywhere you go you should try to find a father, a mother, a brother and a sister.” I may not be Malian but the people 12 degrees north of the equator make no exceptions and here, after only two months, I already feel as though I have been welcomed into the family. cmason@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Another face of Mali selling goods in the market.

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Imprint features

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Molly Bloom’s a wilting flower Tim Alamenciak IMPRINT STAFF

Molly Bloom’s Irish Pub 170 University Ave W Waterloo, Ontario 519-885-0892 After visiting my favourite bar in this little metropolis, Jersey Lilly’s, we decided to trek all the way down to University Plaza. Not being the type to dig the club scene, we opted to head to Molly Bloom’s instead of the other clubs around here. Having heard it’s a rockin’ good time, I was a little bit excited. It was around midnight and the place was ripe with furiously drunk students. From the outside it sounded almost like they were playing some loud music, but no, it was just people being drunk. Personally, I’m not a big fan of uncoordinated loudness. I mean, people singing along to songs, even horribly out of key, is better than groups of people talking loudly in some sort of strange choir. The decor of the place was reminiscent of Lilly’s, sporting wooden tables and chairs and old-fashioned decorated walls, but they didn’t quite achieve the effect that a true pub should. The best way to describe the place is dirty. It was really unclear where we should or could sit and everything seemed to be all over the place. It was like a very poorly run dank (slang for a small bar, usually dark, only serving beer, rather quiet and out of the way) except less organized, and much more crowded. There was no music or live bands playing, but

a stage had been set up with live microphones. This allowed for an extremely inebriated guy to take the stage. Apparently, it was his birthday, and he seemed to like the Leafs a lot, which I didn’t mind. He was a terrible singer, crooning out classic hits like “Roxanne,” but he was entertaining and so Molly’s staff let him stay up there for a good 15 minutes. They then proceeded to escort him out and put on some crappy tunes. I would’ve been happier if he stayed on all night. The general vibe of the place was crowded, noisy and hostile. At one point a lemon hit me, but thankfully I returned it to its rightful owner. He didn’t seem grateful, for some reason. As usual, at an Irish pub, I had to have a dark beer. I happily had my first Guinness; unfortunately it was in a rather unsavoury environment. Personally, I prefer Waterloo Dark to Guinness, but I did rather enjoy it, eventually. Our drinks took about three quarters of a smoke break to arrive, which was a little less timely than I’m used to. Given the crowd, it was somewhat excusable. Perhaps I went on the wrong night, or maybe it was just the wrong time. It seemed that everybody was celebrating a birthday that night. While I do somewhat enjoy loud and crowded environments, Molly’s just didn’t accomplish this well. If you’re the type that likes a vibe like a house party that has everybody from the school in it, then you’d probably dig Molly’s. But if you’re like me and want a lot of great loud tunes and a friendly environment, then I suggest you avoid it. Or just go there when you’re tanked enough to not care. talamen@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

TIM ALAMENCIAK

The nice lime green patio and small boxy look of Molly’s does not help

Fleeing the nest Tim Alamenciak IMPRINT STAFF

University is a time of change, a time to escape your parents and become your own person. But a good portion of the first-year student populace is still living at home. Sure, it may save some money on rent and whatnot, but when you and your friends go out to the bar and your mom shows up with a toque and mittens because it’s cold, the cool factor kind of drops a little. Recently I took the leap towards independence, and it was not an easy road. There are many, many things you should do to prepare. Firstly, remember that your parents are your best friends. Even if now they’re cutting in on your mojo, later they will always be there for you. Let them know that you’re doing this for independence, and to take the next step in life. Let them work with you every step of the way, and most importantly, tell them early. Also, setting a date helps fend off any opposition. That way it’s not merely “I think I’ll move out sometime.” Instead it becomes a tangible day that they have to prepare for. Make sure that you have a good place. It’s definitely not nice to move out on your own for the first time and be faced with a room where the floor is decorated with splotches of blue paint, and your landlord says, “Don’t step on the blue, and you won’t go through.”

Although moving in with friends is frequently noted as being a bad idea, it can sometimes be excellent. If you find somebody who has a place, who you know fairly well and who is looking for a roommate, consider that. It helps a lot when there are people that you can count on for help. While telling your parents early, try to negotiate with them for things like a television, VCR, DVD player or even a computer. In my household, we only had one family computer and a sparse number of televisions. They shouldn’t be too hesitant to give you the basics. I should caution you, though: when you’re out on your own, things change. Your parents become…your friends. As scary as it may sound, they stop ragging on you a lot and tend to leave you to yourself. Also, be prepared for President’s Choice, Life and Smart Choice products filling your cupboards. They do start to taste good after awhile, I promise. But then there are also the bonuses like being able to venture home at three in the morning, carrying a bag of beer glasses and singing “Everybody hurts” at the top of your lungs. So consider it carefully, and remember to talk with your parents. It’s going to hurt their hearts more than your wallet. talamen@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Correction In the March 12, 2004 edition of Imprint, Tim Alamenciak’s article entitled “Where everybody knows your name,” the fee for using the convenience bank machine at Jersey Lilly’s was reported to be $3.00, when in reality it is only $1.50. The additional charges are a result of your banking institution. CIBC does not charge this fee, whereas Bank of Montreal does. Imprint apologizes for this error.


ARTS

Imprint arts

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004 FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

17

UW rocks with CD comp — page 20

arts@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Inside the heart of a Jersey Girl Jersey Girl Kevin Smith Mirimax

Life’s a funny thing. For example, if five years ago you’d have told me that Kevin Smith would make a movie that would cause women to utter “Aaawww,” I would have laughed.— quite heartily. I mean, this is the same guy whose previous movies caused those same women to moan “Eeewww.” A guy renowned for comic books, Star Wars, and humour so racy it would cause even Michelle Titus to blush. So here we are with Smith trying to convince us that he can make a movie without dick and fart jokes, a movie without stoner icons Jay & Silent Bob — a movie that says something about life. Does he succeed? In a word, yes. Jersey Girl, the sixth film by geekgod Kevin Smith, is a heart-felt, if sometimes sappy, tale of a widowed father trying to make sense of a life that has suddenly fallen apart. Ollie Trinke is played by Ben Afflek (he was the bomb in Phantoms, yo!) with a performance that is sometimes on, sometimes off, but, more often than not, full of enough sincerity for us to believe that this man is real. You see, Ollie leads a troubled life. At first, he is a respected and successful publicist in New York. But after his wife (Jennifer Lopez) dies, leaving him with their newborn baby

girl, he is embarrassingly fired from his job and he leaves the big apple for his hometown of Highlands, New Jersey. Yes, this movie does star Jennifer Lopez. And yes, she is romantically involved with Affleck. If this brings a bad taste to anyone’s mouth, please leave your tabloid prejudice at the door and try not to judge the movie by this fact alone. Besides, as the director himself said while promoting the movie on Leno: “Don’t worry, she’s dead in the first 15 minutes.” The majority of the film takes place seven years after the unfortunate events. Ollie is now living with his humourous and curmudgeonly old father (George Carlin) and doing his best raising his now walking and talking daughter, Gertie. Ollie may live and work in New Jersey, but his heart still lies in New York and with the life he once had. He understands that with the way his old career ended, his chances of ever working as an agent again are virtually non-existent. He manages to find a reason for not giving up on that better life in his charming daughter, played by newcomer Raquel Castro, who makes us believe she is this spunky, charismatic kid with a thing for Cats, the musical. But things never stay uncomplicated for long. Enter everyone’s favorite elf-maiden, Liv Tyler, playing witty video store clerk Maya. While the romance between Ollie and Maya

The titular Jersey Girl and Ben Affleck have a heart-to-heart. is certainly an important part of the movie, make no mistake, the underlying relationship in the film is that between Ollie and his daughter. All throughout the movie we are reminded that being an adult involves making sacrifices and learning to move on. If this sounds like it could lead to sappy and sentimental situations, well, it does. But hold on a second. Think for a moment: is there anything wrong with that? Many online critics are blasting Smith for “selling out,” which apparently involves in-

fusing your characters with sincerity and that scary L-word, love. OK, so it may not be Forrest Gump, but it does have a soul, and that is more than can be said for much else on the marquee. While the drama does play a central role in the plot, there is also more than enough comedy to keep you entertained: this movie is funny! And we’re not talking Julia Roberts-style romantic comedy funny, but actual funny. The movie is full of wit and stuff that would coerce a chuckle out of anyone, from teenagers to adults.

COURTESY OF NEWSASKEW

Ultimately, while the movie isn’t perfect, it does get its message across: life is about making choices. Some are easy, some hard, and some painful, but at the end of the day, what really matters is being with those that you love, because that is the best life there is. In a move that could only come from this particular director, that message is delivered by yet another Smith, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. If this sounds funny, it is. After all, life’s a funny thing. Filip Vukcevic, special to Imprint

Rollins on Dubya, Ike, Kirk and everything in between Matt Charters Stevenson

and

Garick

IMPRINT STAFF

Muthafuckin’ Rollins! On Wednesday, March 31 Henry Rollins rolled through Waterloo on his spoken word tour. The packed crowd at the Humanities Theatre got treated to three and a half full hours of ranting from Rollins on topics as diverse as his country’s presidential policies, his masturbation practices and why he hardly ever goes out in Los Angeles. Rollins is known for being the lead singer in Black Flag, one of the most influential American punk rock bands of all time and a powerful counterpoint to ’80s hair metal. He was also the frontman in Rollins Band, whose video for the song “Liar” was an early inductee into Ed the Sock’s Fromage. These days, Rollins divides his time between acting, hosting various TLC shows, spoken word tours like this one and good ol’ rock ’n’ roll. The night started off innocently enough, with Rollins apologizing to us as Canadians for the behaviour of George W. Bush and the White House in matters of foreign policy and just plain idiocy. He tried to reassure us that there are

millions of Americans dedicated to “getting this stupid mutherfucker out of office” in the next federal election, and “making Dick Cheney hang from his nuts” for the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. He also made fun of George “Dubya” for recent remarks made about America’s astronauts, when he referred to them as “brave ... spatial entrepreurs” in a speech about Mars exploration. Rollins soon moved off the political topics and on to something more personal — his love life, or lack thereof. I have never heard a man talk more lovingly about strapping on a crash helmet and inserting a bite plate in order to combat his post ejaculate escapades, citing several intensely embarassing incidents in which he woke up (or “came to”) in the most public of places — his driveway, or backyard, or hotel hallway. Rollins, or Henry, as he likes to be referred to, then proceeded to wax philosophically on his adventures in touring for a most worthy cause: the West Memphis Three. Henry and his band went on a world tour and released a benefit CD to raise money for these three men, one of whom is on death row. Boast-

COURTESY HENRYROLLINS.COM

Rollins stands up for a show. ing proudly that he and his band had raised over $100,000 to try and get possible DNA evidence examined that could possibly clear the convicted. Rollins’ story-telling style is every-

thing that you could possibly want in a storyteller. He is intense, animated, loud, violent and he does all sorts of hilarious impersonations. He was constantly getting himself sidetracked from his narrative, with anecdotes coming from every direction in the middle of every story. Far be it to say that these forays off the beaten track took away from any of the night. He always came back to bring the threads of the story to a close, and the tangents were always entertaining. For someone who’s been around the entertainment industry so long, Rollins displays none of the arrogance you might expect from a star. In fact, he touts his working-class upbringing like a badge of honour, and contrasted his lifestyle to that of others living in Los Angeles with a story of a surreal experience about scamming tickets to the Kill Bill world premiere with Adam Rifkin (writer of such hit films as The Chase and Small Soldiers), eating as much free food as possible, getting shot down in a glance by Sheryl Crow and meeting Ike Turner at the after party. Rollins is an altogether fascinating individual. From lamenting about how his potential mates always end up saying “I’m not really much of a

reader” to explaining why he embarked on a USO tour to cheer up America’s forces in Afghanistan (he was against the war, not the soldiers — they were just doing a “shitty job”), he was never boring. The night ended with the audience on their feet, cheering for the man who finished a three-hour speech on only half a bottle of water. Intense. mcharters@imprint.uwaterloo.ca gstevenson@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


Imprint arts

18

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Success on your own terms Andrea Kerswill

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UNHEARD OF Just another pretty face. I, like many others, have to resign myself to hearing that phrase from ignorant people for many days to come. Although I can’t blame them, I’m sure someone said it to them years ago and they have carried it with them ever since. Yet the phrase wouldn’t be clichÊ and catty if there wasn’t at least a partial truth to it. As such, you can decide what to do when someone decides to spew these words forth. You basically have two options: you can either a) not peep a sound (usually because you are so surprised someone had the audacity to say it to you), or b) you can lash back with comments describing how, yes, you are going to be different — and here’s why. But the latter usually doesn’t work and it is a major waste of time. When anyone lays claim to their want / need / desire to work within the arts world, the common assumption is that this person wants fame and fortune. And of course they do, who doesn’t? The reality is, though, after interviewing, observing and living in the community arts world of K-W, it is abundantly clear that really everyone is just another pretty face and the household names we have come to know are household because of odds and luck. It’s like calling the person who just won the Super 7 smart with

GALT LITTTLE THEATRE

Andrea Kerswill (Lizzie Tingley) and Kathy Paul (Peggy Cameron) rehearse for Galt Little Theatre’s The Last Real Summer. The show opens April 22 and runs to May 8. money, the best, brilliant, engaging and blah blah blah. No, they just had the right numbers. This doesn’t mean of course that those we know so well are not talented, brilliant and engaging, but why stack their talent against those among us? I still do not know why we do this to ourselves. Why we must always label someone “the best� at anything. If we look closely we will see that our judgment of this is entirely skewed. There are some that have the drive and pure need to become famous, but for the artists who just want to be artists, what is in it for them? Well, clearly it’s their art. And that, my friend, has nothing to do with a pretty face. As they say, those with the drive will succeed, but remember that success is on your own terms and not some jackass that tries to tell you to give it up. If there is anything community arts has taught me (and I hope you too) it is that

the true artists, the vulnerable everyday people, are the ones that live right next door. It has absolutely nothing to do with drive or will, no, for them it is about just being able to play a song, dance in a show, write a poem, or produce a play. In finishing this column, this conclusion seemed to come to me at just the right time. My director for the play I am in now took us all out for drinks and food at a local bar after rehearsal last night. As we were all sitting there, laughing and telling jokes, my director leaned over to me and asked me if I felt welcome in the group. I said of course I did, this is a great group of people. My director just smiled at me and said, “I’ve done this for 25 years. We do this because we love it you know Andrea.� All I thought was, “I know Jim, I know, I love it too.� akerswill@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Imprint arts

19

Graduation day, part two: living through the silver screen David Carey DIET COKE HEAD As this issue of Imprint is distributed, it is the last day of classes for the winter 2004 term. School’s out for freaking summer. For many of you, it’s your last day of classes, period. School is out, quite literally, forever. Although I have another four months of school left to go, graduation is still looming out there like some giant neon sign that just keeps flashing you are a grown-up now — welcome to the real world, bitch. The real world? Grown…up? There must be some mistake. I’m only here for the food! The real world. What a terrifying thought. Go to grad school. Get a good job. Be successful. Find happiness. I’m not some trashy, Bolshevist, won’t-let-my-khakis-define-me beatnik or anything, but it all seems so planned out. I feel like in many ways I’m still way too young to have to worry about growing up. A large part of my life basically revolves around what I see onscreen. Conversations generally involve fairly obscure film and television quotations, often resulting in the isolation of others who aren’t up to speed with my references. As usual I turn to the media for comfort and philosophical direction. We’ve seen lots of high school graduations in the movies. But we’re moved past the events in Can’t Hardly Wait or Say Anything. High school

is so over. For characters in these films graduation wasn’t about growing up, it was about going forward. They’re nervous about the future but excited to gain independence. When high school ended we were comfortable in the knowledge that we still had a cozy four-year window during which we would figure out who the hell we are and what the crap we want to do with our lives. Graduating from university means taking that knowledge and making something of it. The problem is, we’ve been having so much fun that we forgot to cross “existential crisis” off the todo list. Now we’re lost in the woods. I’m talking St. Elmo’s Fire, The Graduate and especially Reality Bites. Strapped for cash, Winona Ryder’s character appeals to her parents for a loan to carry her over until she finds a real job. They refuse. “Why don’t you get a job at the Burgerama?” her mother asks. “They’ll hire you. My Lord, I saw on the TV they had this little retarded boy working the cash register.” Winona blinks bitterly. “Because I’m not retarded, mom… I was valedictorian of my university.” Then that classic familial awkward silence appears, until her stepfather suggests a most ingenious solution: “Well, you don’t have to put that down on your application.” I think our biggest fear is that when we do start this “real world” business, we’ll end up like Winona and have to take a crappy job to make ends meet. Although there’s only one valedictorian and I’m pretty sure our parents wouldn’t compare us to retarded fast food workers, it’s still scary. What if we don’t find success? What if we don’t go to grad school or don’t find good jobs?

COURTESY IMDB

Sometimes reality bites, Winona. Like when you get busted for shoplifting. When the characters of my favourite show, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, graduated high school they blew up the building and saved the world from a giant snake demon. In classic Buffy form, they said goodbye to their childhoods with fire and bloodshed. But they never finished university. Bad grades, apocalypses and family death got in the way. Life started too soon.

Hollywood might depict graduation as the end of innocence, but I like to think of it as the beginning of something. And sure, I’m scared shitless, but that’s what makes it so exciting. Winona can keep her existential crises to herself. I laugh in the face of real life! Reality won’t bite because we won’t let it. dcarey@imprint.uwaterloo.com


Imprint arts

20

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

CKMS seeks talent for compilation CD Matt Charters IMPRINT STAFF

Ever wondered what kind of musical talent lies hidden here at UW? Well, soon you won’t have to wonder any more. Arda Ocal, host of AoK: The Pre-Bomber Show, along with Feds and CKMS, is currently recruiting bands for what will become a homegrown, one-of-a-kind compilation CD. What’s so special about it? The CD will exclusively feature talent associated with UW, past and present. “One member of the band must be an undergrad [student], grad [student], professor or have graduated from UW,” Ocal said. “It is…a one hundred per cent UW initiative.” Ocal said the main purpose behind the CD is to spread awareness of CKMS (our campus and community

radio station) around the school and to raise money for charity. The disc will also help to get some exposure for some homegrown talent. The casting call has already started and will continue until May 15. Ocal is accepting submissions (in the form of links to available online mp3 files) at ifeelaok@hotmail.com, or you can send submissions via snail mail to Compilation CD, c/o CKMS-FM, 200 University Ave., Waterloo ON, N2L 3G1. If your band doesn’t have the means to get anything recorded, don’t fret. Ocal still wants bands without mp3s to drop him a line. “Talent without a studio recording has just as much chance as talent with a studio recording,” he said. “They should e-mail us telling us they have no previous recording, and we

will…listen to them play.” If the band is deemed worthy of compilation status, they will get an opportunity to record their track at CKMS’ very own Palindrome recording studio, with an engineer with over 25 years experience in the business to help out. The band doesn’t have to be current, either. Ocal hopes the compilation will take on a past/ present theme, with bands from all eras of UW represented. A committee comprised of members of Feds, CKMS and Imprint will hand-pick all the bands. “The criteria will be original song — it must be original — musical merit, how well [the band] plays together, and how focused [the band] is,” Ocal said. Lucky bands will get to appear be-

side already-confirmed acts like Craig Cardiff, a UW grad and professional musician signed to MapleMusic, and Samsara, winners of the recent UW Battle of the Bands.

The CD is tentatively due to be released in September, and all profits from the CD sales will go to a yet-to-be-decided charity. mcharters@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Cyanide Kiss gives Waterloo a taste of their poison Kathleen Kras SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

The boys are back in town. Waterloo grads Matt Kras, Adam Kras and Rob McKenna are hitting up the territory that helped keep them lively for four years, their time spent mainly in the buildings at St. Jerome’s. Their drummer, Jeff McKenna, currently resides in their residence keeping the tradition alive. The two McKenna brothers came together years before there was even any “Cyanide Kiss,” with their musical styling that has led to the current endeavour that is this band. With the addition of the two Kras’, (they are not related) the Kiss became one — one compilation with four unique entities. According to Catherine Weddum, who recently reviewed their debut album, HERE, “If you took Nirvana and the Smashing Pumpkins and morphed them together, you might come close to the sound of the Kiss.”

As Hamilton’s Mohawk Entertainment Editor, she added an overall rating of a whopping 5/5! (That’s the best there is, right?) Also, our very own CKMS PreBomber show hosts, Arda Ocal and Jenna Holko, previously had a “tellall” interview with the group, and have been playing Cyanide Kiss tracks steadily all year. The AoK show proudly salutes the guys for their “’90s sound, and original attitude.” In the summer of 2003, the band was able to record their 13 original songs in the same place some of the “greats” have been. Robin Aube’s studio, known for recording with Sarah Harmer and Luther, was the place for taking a few instruments and voice, and making these songs fly. Their live performances began shortly after the release of their CD, to start with, in their hometown of Hamilton, Ontario. With every opportunity to perform since that time, they have taken a different approach, added new intricacies, and overall, always

made for one heck of a great show. Their growing fan base seems to follow the band wherever they go. And now, Cyanide Kiss will be hitting our own neck of the woods, making it convenient for all UW students to come out and catch the show. This Saturday, April 3, at Weaver’s Arms, the “Flying Buttresses” will be opening for Cyanide Kiss beginning at 10 p.m. But get there as soon as you can — it’s gonna be a full house. Check out their Web site, www.cyanidekiss.com, for upcoming dates or for information on their album and new DVD, which features a behind the scenes (and more…) look at this awesome group of guys.

The boys of Cyanide Kiss take time out for the fans.

KATHLEEN KRAS

Keep your Rogers service. Work less this summer. Don’t bother disconnecting your Rogers™ Cable or Rogers Internet service this summer. Instead, just put it on hold. It will automatically reconnect in September for free. You won’t have to pay the monthly fees, and you’ll avoid reconnection charges. It’s our way of saying thank you for being a Rogers Cable subscriber. And if you’re a Rogers Hi-Speed Internet or Rogers Hi-Speed Internet Lite subscriber, you’ll still have access to your e-mail via WebMail for the summer.

Automatic reconnection. Automatic savings.

When you get back to school you can save another 25% for the first 4 months of Rogers Cable. And you’ll pay just $24.95 a month for Rogers Hi-Speed Internet for the first 4 months.*

Call 1 866 842-2651 and start saving.

*Offer expires July 1, 2004. PST/GST, or HST and connection/relocation fees are extra. Offer only valid to students who sign up to Summer Disconnect program. Cable service discount applies to Analog Basic and Specialty Channel packages only. This offer valid for installation in Rogers cable-wired areas only and cannot be combined with any other promotion. Regular price for Rogers Hi-Speed Internet is just $44.95 per month, plus applicable taxes. Offer applies to Rogers Hi-Speed Internet only. Some price restrictions apply including a $10 surcharge per month for Rogers Hi-Speed Internet customers who are non-cable subscribers. Rogers VIP rates do not apply for the duration of the rebate period. Modem set-up: 3.0 mbps download. 384 kbps upload. The system is configured to maximum modem capabilities within Rogers’ own network. Actual speeds online can vary with Internet traffic, server or other factors. Offer is based on Rogers account being in good standing. Subject to error and change at any time without notice. Not available in all areas. Certain restrictions may apply. TMRogers, Mobius design and Rogers Cable are trademarks of Rogers Communications Inc. Used under license.


SCIENCE FRIDAY,FRIDAY, APRIL 2,APRIL 2004 2, 2004

Imprint science

21

science@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Neanderthals meet science fiction

Robert Sawyer The Neandrethal Parallax (Series) Hominids Humans Hybrids Erin L. Gilmer IMPRINT STAFF

Over 40,000 years ago when our ancestors were still living in caves, there were more than one species of hominid on Earth. There was once a time when Homo sapiens shared the world with Neanderthals. No one knows why the Neanderthals disappeared and why we won the right to dominate the Earth. But what if it didn’t happen that way and the Neanderthals were the ones left around? Sawyer creates a world in Hominids where this is the case. But in Neanderthal society, things are done differently. They aren’t faced with many of the problems of our modern society. Neanderthals have successfully prevented overpopulation, stopped all crime for good and have never conceived of technology that would pollute the environment. Everything is running smoothly on their world until physicists Ponter Boddit and Adikor Huld run into a problem with their quantum computer. During one of the first tests of their sophisticated machine, Ponter is transported through a portal to another dimension and ends up in the Sudbury Neutrino Observatory in Northern Ontario. Ponter quickly becomes the center of an international freak show and all he wants is to return home. Meanwhile, Ponter’s work and life partner, Adikor, is being charged with Ponter’s murder. The only way to redeem himself and to save Ponter is to re-open the portal so he can come back. Canadian sci-fi author Robert Sawyer puts a hefty amount of research into this book and includes a lot of technical detail. From the

physics of the quantum computer to the molecular biology used to examine Ponter’s blood, Sawyer satisfies the scientist in his readers. As an avid reader, I often find myself questioning the science in a lot of books, but Sawyer covers himself v e r ywell.

He has to, though, because many of the ideas he comes up with in his books have to be backed up by scientific knowledge. For example, any immunologist would suspect that dropping an individual into a foreign land would cause great danger in the form of disease that he could not have developed immunity to. But Sawyer solves such problems in great detail and with creativity. In this situation, Ponter actually does get sick and almost dies and all those who made contact with him are quarantined. In the second book in the series, Humans, the Neanderthals have to decide whether or not to

keep the portal to Earth open. The “gliksins,” as they call us, are a violent race, but much technological information could be gained from them, especially regarding things like space travel. There is no question for the humans on the other side that they could gain from relations with the Neanderthals. The potential to develop quantum computers is one reason. Once the High Council is convinced to reopen the portal, a geneticist that Ponter fell in love with in the first book returns with him to the Neanderthal world. Mary finds it as difficult to fit in there as Ponter felt in her world, but that doesn’t stop her from wanting to form a loving relationship with him. But since neither can stand the other’s world, where could they live? Never mind the fact that on Ponter’s world, everyone keeps two mates. By the time Sawyer gets to Hybrids, the third

book in the series, Mary and Ponter have decided to have a child. But besides the sociological conflicts between the two, humans and Neanderthals have a different number of chromosomes. Sawyer creatively and informatively comes up with a solution to this. He also spends a lot of time addressing the spiritual differences between the two species, or rather the lack of spirituality. Why is it that humans have this need for believing in a god and Neanderthals don’t? Is it physiological? For anyone interested in science, all three books in this series are highly researched and full of technological detail, especially in molecular biology and physics. Sawyer’s insight into human nature is fascinating and leaves one pondering just why our society works the way it does and wondering “what if” we could make the drastic changes that the Neanderthals did to solve societal problems. Would it coincide with our ethics to sterilize all criminals (and their offspring) in order to stop crime and violence for good? How about carrying around little cameras to keep permanent records of everything we do? These books are just as much sociological and they are scientific. I would recommend the series to anyone with an open mind who’s ever questioned why we are here and why we do the things we do. egilmer@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


22

Waterloo alumni continue to support excellence!

Imprint science 22

In 2003, Maclean’s magazine ranked UW #1 in the category of “Alumni Support� amongst comprehensive universities! This ranking demonstrates that UW alumni are successful, generous, and recognize the value of their hard-earned UW degree. It is their way of saying "thanks" and contributing to an exceptional university experience for students following in their footsteps. As a 2004 grad, we challenge you to step up and say thank you by making a pledge to our Grad Class Challenge. You’ve benefitted from previous grad classes who have supported the faculties, endowment funds, equipment, student awards, and other projects.

Now it’s your turn. Help your Faculty or University college set a new record for pledges to the Grad Class Challenge in 2004. Help future students to get the most possible out of their UW experience. For more information, contact your Faculty or University college grad class rep or visit us online:

www.development.uwaterloo.ca

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Azadeh Samadi & Tim Alamenciak IMPRINT STAFF

Thiamin deficiency?

According to Dr. Weil from the university of Arizona’s health sciences centre, one of the B vitamins that the body needs for metabolic reactions such as burning calories is called thiamin (vitamin B-1). The brain needs thiamine in order to produce glucose. Thiamin deficiency has been found to cause signs of depression, fear, mood changes, feelings of unease, disordered thinking and other psychological symptoms. In addition, thiamin levels can be affected by alcohol intake, so those who regularly enjoy alcoholic beverages should consider daily supplementation.Vitamin B-1 works hand in hand with other B vitamins and it is ideally taken as part of a B-complex or multi-vitamin supplement. Today’s tip: supplement week — calcium sources

According to Dr. Weil, one of the necessary supplements is certainly calcium. You should be aware that some foods, such as alcohol, fructose, caffeine, wheat bran, raw spinach, salt and tobacco actually interfere with calcium absorption. Women need an intake of 1,000 to 1,500 mg

of calcium per day and men should get about 1,000 mg. One of the great sources of calcium is sardines, which has 350 mg of usable calcium per 3.75-ounce can. Collard greens offer up 225 mg per cup and tofu clocks in at 250 mg per half-cup. Other high-calcium foods include sesame seeds, broccoli and molasses, as well as dairy products and foods that are fortified with calcium, such as orange juice and soy milk. Vitamin D is necessary for your body to properly absorb and utilize calcium, so be sure to get 400-800 IUs daily. If you need to take supplements, calcium citrate is the best form to use; combining it with magnesium will help avoid its constipating effects. Pigeons to take over Rogers Cable

Rogers Cable may be buying a lot of homing pigeons soon.An experiment was recently conducted in Israel by a gaggle of geeks. They sought to prove that the bandwidth of homing pigeons was larger than that of DSL. The group loaded three pigeons with 1.3GB flash drives and set them flying. The pigeons had to go for 100km, with no wires attached and keep the data intact. They managed to do it, achieving a bandwidth of 2.27Mbps, taking approximately 30 minutes to transfer the data, a task which would normally take several hours over a “high speed� internet connection. The pigeons broke the record for the longest wireless range ever achieved. Although there is no practical application for this experiment, it goes to show that nature can evolve with technology. asamadi@imprint.uwaterloo.ca talamen@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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SPORTS FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004 FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

Imprint sports

23

Warriors give back Reaching out to the community —page 26

sports@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

And the 2003-2004 winners are... Rod McLachlan IMPRINT STAFF

On Friday, March 24, the athletics department handed out its most prestigious and most anticipated awards of the year, at the 43rd Annual Athletics Banquet held at Federation Hall to cap off another successful season for the various Warrior teams. Two of the highest awards to be handed out were the Totzke Trophy, which is given to the male athlete of the year and the Marsden Trophy, which is awarded to the female athlete of the year. Winning one of these trophies causes the outstanding athlete to be automatically inducted into the University of Waterloo Sports Hall of Fame. This year the Totzke Trophy was shared between two outstanding athletes, swimming star Matt Mains and football standout John Sullivan. This was fitting since it allowed the athletics department to honour both Mains, who had another outstanding year at the CIS swimming championship and was last year’s Totzke Trophy winner, and Sullivan, who had a tremendous season from the free safety position that earned him CIS all-star honours. Sullivan led the OUA with 72 tackles and

should go high in this year’s CFL draft. Leigh Nevermann of the women’s rugby team grabbed The Marsden Trophy, given to the UW female athlete of the year, as she was honoured for her dedication and superb performance during the course of the rugby season. The Federation of Students Rookie of the Year Awards were handed out to Payman Charkhzarin from the men’s soccer team and Kathleen Freeman from the women’s volleyball team. Freeman established herself as one of the OUA’s top middle blockers, which earned her OUA all-star honours. The Brian Farrance Therapy Award was awarded to Ian Detta of the men’s hockey team this year. The J.O. Hemphill Award was awarded to Matt Iannetta from the men’s hockey and soccer teams. The Director’s Award went to Beth Nordemann of the women’s field hockey team. Men’s and women’s soccer coach Peter Mackie was selected as the Imprint Coach of the Year by the sports writers of Imprint for his tremendous efforts managing two varsity squads to highly successful seasons. rmclachlan@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

PHOTOS COURTESY UW ATHLETICS / STEVE BROOKS

Top right: Former University of Waterloo Athletics Director Carl Totzke (centre) presents the Totzke Trophy to this year’s co-winners swimmer Matt Mains (left) and football free safety John Sullivan (right). Bottom right: Federation of Students VP Internal John Fedy (centre) presents the Feds Rookie of the year awards to Payman Charkhzarin from the men’s soccer team and Kathleen Freeman from the women’s volleyball team. Top left: Athletic therapist Rob Burns (right) presents the Brian Farrance Therapy Award to Ian Detta of the men’s hockey team. Bottom left: Director of Athletics and Recreational Services Judy McCrae (right) presents the Marsden Trophy, given to the female athlete of the year, to Leigh Nevermann of the women’s rugby team, who grabbed the top honour with her dedication and superb performance during the course of the 2003-2004 rugby season.


Imprint sports

24

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

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Want to make your degree work better for you? Behavioural Science Technology - B.A. Option St. Lawrence College, Kingston Campus, offers practical training with placements and a very high rate of graduate employment... With a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology, you can get your Behavioural Science Technology diploma in only 10 months. Skills in this field are obtained with a combination of 750 hours of work practice and classroom theory. This program was the first of its kind in Canada and for the last 30 years has been the acknowledged leader in the field of applied behaviour analysis and behavioural counselling. Governments and agencies are increasingly recognizing behavioural approaches as “best practices� in many field including autism and corrections. For complete details on this program, please check the website at www.sl.on.ca Program Coordinator Professor Bill Kirby can be reached at (613) 544-5400, ext. 1127 or by e-mail at bkirby@sl.on.ca

COURTESY GERRY FUCHS

UW coach Hanes (centre) has received support from players and his assistant Chris Steingart (right).

Contract: Alumni and players speak out Continued from cover

Other volleyball coaches in the OUA have sent Hanes their best wishes since the decision was made, but most are still surprised by the move. “I am not sure what the rationale is for the decision, but I would say that I was somewhat surprised because of the success the team had this past season and what I would of thought they would have had in the future,� commented Laurier men’s volleyball head coach Shayne White on Hanes’ contract not being renewed. Hanes will be leaving the team in excellent shape for the future, due to his strong efforts at recruiting. “The worst thing is that whoever they get to come in next year, he will look like a genius given the team’s performance this past year [added to the fact that] we are only losing one player and given some of the recruits that will be coming — some immediate impact players,� said

assistant coach Steingart. “In my opinion they could hire anybody — Judy [McCrae] could do it — and they will win but the credit will all be Doug’s in my opinion. “I really don’t like the politics that seem to be going on within the [athletics] department,� he added. Despite having his coaching contract terminated, Hanes continues to coach the Waterloo junior team, which was created by Hanes to give rookies and recruits a chance for extra competition. “The team is poised to win the Ontario championship and represent the province at the national championship in Vancouver. Doug’s continued commitment to this team is more than commendable considering his situation,� explained Steingart. Even a number of his former players have spoken out about the dismissal. “I enjoyed having Doug as a coach,

and I feel bad that he won’t be able to coach the team anymore, because I know it was a big part of his life,� confided former Hanes player Paul Hulshof. “Doug’s volleyball direction will definitely be missed by all of us, but what we will miss most is Doug’s humanness and his ability to connect and make the extra effort with his players, something that continues to this day,� said Steingart. The process to replace a man who has over 20 years of coaching experience will not be an easy one; whoever fills coach Hanes’ place behind the bench will have to work that much harder if he or she ever wants to measure up to the high standard that has been set by a man that was truly a players’ coach and will never be forgotten by his team. -with files from UW Athletics rmclachlan@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

Head coach Doug Hanes’ volleyball career: -Over 20 years of coaching experience at the high school, club and university levels -Played left-side as a player for the Guelph Oaks ‘AA’ volleyball club as well as for the University of Guelph Gryphons 1978: OUA champion with the Gryphons; his team placed third in the CIAU Late 1970’s: Played in two Canadian ‘AA’ championships with his Guelph Oaks club 1995: Coached the Forest Heights Trojans, a local high school team, to OFSAA ‘AAA’ gold 1996: Coached the Trojans to a second consecutive OFSAA ‘AAA’ championship 1999-2001: Coached the Waterloo Warriors to two consecutive OUA West finals after winding up with 9-6 and 8-6 regular season records 2002-2003: After starting out 2-7, Hanes’ team goes 7-2 in the second half to make postseason


Imprint sports

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

25

Laying claim to the next Warriors Part two: selling the school, scholarships and ethics of recruiting Adam McGuire IMPRINT STAFF

With the conclusion of the 2003-04 varsity athletics season, coaches from universities across Canada turn their attention away from the strategic and motivational aspects of their jobs and turn it on the ever-tedious recruiting process. Virtually every varsity coach will say that the first step to the recruiting process is identifying the blue-chip prospects. But on top of looking for pure talent, coaches must be always aware of their team’s needs as well as the fact that some athletes will thrive more than others within certain coaching systems. But once a coach has identified his key recruits and contact with all of them has been made, the process truly begins with selling the university. Numerous factors usually come into play when coaches try to talk up their schools, but UW women’s volleyball coach Jason Grieve says that, at Waterloo, the school basically sells itself. “Our academics really set us apart,� said Grieve. “Waterloo has a huge reputation [and] I think that makes us really viable.� For UW men’s hockey coach Karl Taylor, selling the school to potential student-athletes is a different process altogether. Because the players entering varsity hockey are, for the most part, two to four years removed from high school and much more experienced than other athletes, the recruiting process is modified dramatically. “We sell ourselves, the coaching staff,� said Taylor. “People are more likely to make a commitment to a

person rather than a building. The school here sells itself academically, that’s the easy part.� Both Taylor and Grieve do extensive recruiting outside of Ontario, thanks in part to their past coaching experiences (Grieve has coached in Alberta and Saskatchewan, while Taylor has worked in New Brunswick and Alberta). However, with Ontario’s ban on athletics-based entry scholarships, convincing athletes to leave possibly lucrative situations near home becomes difficult. Both Taylor and Grieve favour Ontario lifting its ban on sports scholarships. “I think definitely some student athletes deserve something for their efforts, both academically and athletically,� said Grieve. “We’re on different standards [than other provinces in Canada]. When an athlete finally makes a commitment to attend UW, perhaps the most ambiguous and possibly dangerous part of the recruiting process rears its head. With no scholarships and therefore, no signed contracts for intention to enroll (similar to the NCAA’s letter of intent), a coach must announce a new recruit with extreme caution and discretion. A commitment to a specific university is no more than verbal in Canada, which leaves a possibility (albeit a small one) for other coaches to “steal� recruits from other schools. Luckily, these instances are few and far between. “I believe in the ethics of coaching,� Taylor said. “I trust my fellow coaches.� Taylor adds that, while some coaches are weary of advertising new recruits early, he believes that it solidi-

fies the student athlete’s commitment even more. “I think it secures the kid even more, now everyone knows he’s coming here,� commented Taylor. “It’s not a secret, [opposing coaches] know about all the kids.� Once a commitment is made, the final step is gaining admittance into the university. This is often the most frustrating part of the whole process because the power is suddenly removed from the coach and athlete as it is thrust into the hands of the registrar’s office. Both Taylor and Grieve acknowledge that, while the admissions battle can be a tough one, the prospective student-athletes must be able to make the grade. “It’s definitely more challenging,� Grieve said of the ever-rising admissions average. “[But] I think it’s understandable. We’re very conscious of the fact that they need to have a good academic background.� “The rules are the rules,� Taylor said of the unwavering admissions averages. “If a recruit isn’t close [to the average], then we eliminate him. In our priorities, number one is family, number two is school and number three is hockey and that’s the way we try to run our program.� Assuming student athletes make the grade (usually, there are few problems with athletes falling short of the admissions averages), the recruiting process is complete. While coaches are obviously more visible during the active season, the recruiting process ensures varsity coaches everywhere that they will be kept busy year-round. amcguire@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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Adam McGuire TWO-MINUTE WARNING There’s nothing quite like opening day at a big league ballpark. The air is fresh, the peanuts are crunchy and the baseline chalk is a crisp white. The atmosphere of watching a major league game at the park is unmatched. But the atmosphere of watching a major league game on television is unbearable. I can feel my eyelids getting heavy already. Watching baseball on television is about as much fun as a body cavity search. I’d rather be watching Donohue. I’d rather be watching The English Patient. I’d rather be watching C-Span’s extended coverage of the Peruvian parliamentary debate, even if it is en espaùol. Television was, without doubt, the worst thing to ever happen to baseball. And it’s not even an easy problem to fix. There are so many things going wrong for televised baseball that the only conceivable solution is to buy a

no such thrill. After 67 different camera angles of Joe Torre sitting in the dugout, you start to realize how small of a fraction 1/162 actually is. The season doesn’t start to get exciting until August, when the postseason races that still exist begin to wind down. But when the New York Yankees are 43.5 games up by August 1, their games start to lose a bit of lustre. August is also about the time that the basement-dwellers of big-league baseball begin to transform their rosters into a conglomerate of minor league “has-beens� and “never-will-be’s,� which makes turning on the tube to watch them a burdening exercise. Nothing is more mentally exhausting than tuning into a September match-up between the Tampa Bay Devil Rays and the Detroit Tigers. Baseball moves at a slow enough pace even for stadium-goers, but viewing game after game on television is completely intolerable. Only while watching a Major League Baseball game can you constantly channel-surf and never miss a thing. The only reward for such a mind-numbing season is that, at least the season’s last few weeks and the playoffs are exhilarating to watch. So wake me up in October. amcguire@imprint.uwaterloo.ca

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ticket for a game. The pace is too slow, the games are too long and the players are too lazy. Only in baseball can a socalled “athlete� run for 90 feet only to stop and take a break. The main problem with televised baseball is that, unlike a live game, there are never enough distractions to make the viewing public forget about how ridiculously slow baseball is. When you’re at the park, there are so many things to do between pitches — you can order a bleacher dog, continue your heckling of the opposing left fielder or make friends with the guy in seat R17. But the between-pitch images of televised baseball include any combination of managers munching on sunflower seeds, pitchers warming up baseballs and batters knocking off their cleats, all of which may or may not include personal cup adjustments. Not exactly riveting television. Another black mark for America’s pastime on the tube is the nauseating length of the Major League Baseball season. It’s hard to get excited for three hours of alleged “action� when, in a 162-game season, a single result means jack squat to the eventual outcome of the year. When you go to the stadium, the thrill of being there allows you to forget how meaningless the game is. But baseball’s televised version offers

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Imprint sports

26

FRIDAY, APRIL 2, 2004

UW athletes “Team Up” with area kids Adam McGuire IMPRINT STAFF

In continuing a tradition that is now entrenched at UW, 49 Warrior athletes from 16 different varsity teams have “teamed up” with the community’s youth and according to them, it’s a great team to be a part of. Team-Up, which is in its seventh season, is a traveling youth outreach program developed by the UW athletics department. Warrior athletes visit schools and groups from the tri-cities area and speak about “the six keys to success.” The motivational series, cosponsored by The Record, hangs its hat on the true-life experiences of the athletes who speak, focusing on goal orientation and proper role models of today’s young students and athletes. “The athletes [that speak in TeamUp] are pretty incredible to take time from their own schedules to do this,” said Kate Shippey, who coordinates the program. “They’re fantastic.” Over Team-Up’s seven years, it has grown to a truly unique and soughtafter program throughout the elementary and high school communities of Kitchener, Waterloo and Cambridge. In the winter 2004 term, over 1500 students have provided audiences for the 40-plus presentations conducted by Team-Up. In fall 2003, over 50 presentations were conducted, falling

on the impressionable ears of over 2000 young people in the area. While the greatest impact of TeamUp is inevitably made on the community’s youth, the athletes involved in the program find it an extremely beneficial experience as well. “It is such a wonderful feeling to know that they look up to you as if we were superstars,” said UW field hockey’s Beth Nordemann, a five-year veteran of Team-Up. “I always leave the school [where we are presenting] with a big smile on my face.” UW golf team member Justin Fluit echoed Nordemann’s sentiments, saying he loves the opportunity to both inform and entertain (Fluit always performs a few golf ball tricks that Tiger Woods has made famous for the enjoyment of his audience). Fluit also adds that he loves the opportunity to share his experiences with the young listeners. “I love to promote UW athletics in the community and expand my own community involvement,” said Fluit. “Team-Up allows me to do both.” The program itself is designed for students and athletes alike. The program centers around the “six keys to success” — setting goals, working hard, having a positive attitude, being a team player, having positive role models, and making choices. However, to ensure the program never becomes

COURTESY UW ATHLETICS/KATE SHIPPEY

UW field hockey’s Beth Nordemann (front, left) and Jessa Jennings (front middle), along with Matt Iannetta of men’s hockey (front, right) pose with two of their Team-Up audience members last fall. stale, each athlete is encouraged to relate these six keys to personal experiences. “My main focus for every presentation is to ensure that every student can relate in some way to the material being presented,” said Fluit of his time with Team-Up. “I have tried to add a little entertainment at times and [I’ve] in-

cluded some lighter moments to see some smiles.” Shippey says that, while there is no way to accurately measure the impact that Team-Up has on its young subjects, the consistent interest in the program proves that TeamUp is a worthwhile venture for both

the UW athletics department and the people involved. “It’s [even] been motivating for me,” said Shippey. “I’m really lucky to be involved in the program. [The athletes] make my job so easy.” amcguire@imprint.uwaterloo.ca


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ESL tutor: experienced teacher – help at any level, all areas: grammar, pronunciation, writing skills, vocabulary, listening skills, oral reports. 745-7298. Tutor available for linear algebra and calculus. Please e-mail Mouli at mathmentor9@yahoo.com.

SER VICES SERVICES Essay help – research and writing. Winning applications, entrance letters from dedicated writing experts. 1-888-3458295 or www.customessay.com. “Ultimate Questions� The Lord Jesus Christ is the difference. Learn about Him. Bible study by correspondence. Please send name and address to: Bible Study, Zion United Reformed Church, 1238 Main Street, Sheffield, ON, L0R 1Z0 or email bible@zurch.on.ca. See web site: www.zurch.on.ca. Click on links, ask for book, sign up today, it’s free! Too many essays, too little time? Essay Experts can help. We provide essay writing/editing/research services. Professional writers. Satisfaction guaranteed. No job too big or too small. 1-877-974-TEXT or essayexperts.ca.

T.O .O.. RESIDENCES

PERSON ALS PERSONALS

Summer Residence in downtown Toronto. Stay in comfort at New College, University of Toronto this summer! Air conditioning, internet and phone in each room. Located in the heart of downtown. For more information please call (416) 978-2477 or e-mail summer.newcollege@utoronto.ca. See our ad on page 9, opinion section. Web site: www.newcollege.utoronto.ca/summer.

Pregnant? Loving couple with two year old, looking to expand our family through adoption. Home study completed. Call collect 705-474-7217.

HELP WANTED Weekend counsellors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Minimum eightmonth commitment. Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, K-W Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, Kitchener, ON, N2G 3V2. Summer employment – Erbsville Kartway requires full time and part time help for yard maintenance, pit crew and licenced concession stand. Starting weekends in April, 884-5650. Now hiring student fundraisers! $8.00/ hour to start, work on campus, flexible hours, raises every term! If you are a good communicator, enthusiastic and dependable, then we want to talk to you! Please apply in person at the Office of Development in South Campus Hall. Please include a cover letter, resume, class schedule and three references. Sharkey's Cafe and Lounge. Oakville recruiting for the biggest summer ever! If you are hip, fresh and fun – earn great money, have the summer of your life! Hiring all positions. Please e-mail mathew_sharkeys@sympatico.ca. Subshack Coffee Shop – part-time help wanted. Day, evening, weekends. Apply in person. 465 Phillip Street, at Albert. Student Work – many openings across Canada. Flexible schedules available. Work in customer sales/service. Scholarships possible. Conditions apply. For a great starting pay please apply at workforstudents.com/can. Are you Mary Poppins? We are looking for the ultimate care giver to look after our three and five year old children in our home. Flexible days of work, flexible hours, no evening or weekend hours, approximately 20-25 hours per week. Excellent compensation. A car is helpful but not essential. We are a professional family in Westmount area (on the bus line, close to campus). Position starts September 2004. Fax resume including references to (519) 571-1582.

FOR SALE HP Scanjet IICX, as is, $15 – come to Imprint, SLC, room 1116 between 9:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. or call 888-4048 for information. 1997 Honda Accord LX – $9900 cert and e-tested. 5 speed manual, 2 door coupe. A/C, alarm, new paint, radiator, water pump, timing belt. 135 k km. Excellent condition. 905-689-5885. B/W Laser Printer for sale – Brother HL1030, good condition, new toner cartridge installed in September. Comes with all cables and drives - $75. If interested, please call 519-725-6552.

ATTENTION!!! LAST PAPER OF THE WINTER TERM...WE'LL BE BACK MAY 7 HAPPY SPRING

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CAMPUS BULLETIN VOL UNTEER OLUNTEER Lutherwood is seeking volunteers for CradleLink, (three/four hours per week, in home) and Child and Parent Place (three to five hours bi-weekly). Building Better Futures...One Volunteer At A Time. www.lutherwoodcoda.org. Have fun tutoring children and youth for an hour or so once a week. Volunteer at UW Tutors. We are a Feds club and affiliated with Frontier College. Call 7478113 or e-mail Candace at chillier@frontiercollege.ca.

CECS Tuesday, April 20 Co-op status changed from "On OwnSelf Imposed" if no Continuous Registration Form is handed in.

UPCOMING Friday, April 2, 2004 Opening exhibitions at KOR Gallery and Studios: Arlene Turkington "Shopping with Eve" and K-W and Area High School "I AM." 7:00 - 9:00 p.m. This exhibit will be at KOR until Saturday, May 9. Contact Janet Dawson-Brock for more information at 742-0154. Last Imprint until May 7. Deadline for May 7 Classifieds and Campus Bulletin events is Monday, May 3 at 5:00 p.m., Student Life Centre, room 1116 or e-mail ads@imprint.uwaterloo.ca. Women and worship lecture with Waterloo Catholic District School Board at Siegfried Hall, St. Jerome's University, 7:00 p.m. Info: Prof. David Seljak, 519884-8110 ext. 256, Carol Persin 519884-8110 ext. 259. Tuesday, April 20, 2004 KW Sexual Assault Support Centre is hosting a volunteer info night from 7:00

to 9:00 p.m. at 151 Frederick Street, Kitchener – are you interested in volunteering?Contact us at 571-0121 or volunteer@kwsasc.org.

ANNOUNCE Need food or short of cash? The Feds food bank is a confidential student-run food bank that provides non-perishable goods to UW students in need. Visit us in the Student Life Centre, room 2108 or you can e-mail us at: uwfoodbank@hotmail.com. Are you Croatian? Are you dating? Are you between the ages of 18 and 32? University of Guelph master student would like to interview Croatians who are in a dating relationship with a Canadian or a Croatian. Both men and women are eligible. Please contact Marinela Braunstein for info at 519-496-6612 or mbraunst@uoguelph.ca. OPAS launches 2004 awards program. These awards recognize university faculty who have demonstrated outstanding achievement in using technology to enhance and improve their teaching. For more info call 416-979-2165 ext. 261 or e-mail jspink@cou.on.ca. Philosophy in Action. Join an on-going discussion that looks at how philosophy applies to everyday life. Saturdays 7:0010:00 p.m. at Victoria School Centre in downtown Kitchener (behind the bus terminal). 741-2501. St. Joseph Secondary School, Mississauga, Ontario, will be holding a 10th anniversary reunion, 1993-2003, on Saturday, May 29, 2004 from 1:00 to 12 midnight. Information call 905-8121376 ext. 520. April is Cancer Awareness month at the Office for Persons with Disabilities. Please check out our office (Needles Hall, Room #1132) or our web site (http:// www.studentservices.uwaterloo.ca/disabilities/events.htm) for more information.

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