1996-97_v19,n14_Imprint by Editor Imprint

T h e University of Waterloo S t u d e n t Newspaper a

Friday, October 18, 1996

Volume 19, Number 14

O N Pub. Mail Product Sales Agreement No. 554677

Under a Sailor's Moon Salt-Water Moon byDrmidM Studio 180, Hagey Hall October 16-19 & 23-26

NEWS

by Patrick Wilkine Imprint &aff

PRINT Page 3 The Federation of Students' newly elected Vice President Administt;ltion and FinanceisToriHarris. W1th voter tum-out afkssthan4%, Harris won by a margin of 57 votes.

University of Waterloo drama dcpBmnent is only using Studio 180 fbr one show this year. Upon enming, the reason is immediately obvious: the entire room has been converttd into a piece ofNcwfibundland. 'Ihcpanoarnadthrrchuadrrd andsixtydcgrres;mountainsandthelights ofa small town to the right, waveswept shore to the &I verdant &- behiad. In the corner, a painted house h m whichextends awoodenporch. Above, thousaods ofsears. AU around,the

FORUM

rtcor&dsouradsofwaves~against

shore. The stage itself is simple, but nothing more is needed to draw the audience into the world ofSdt-WbtcrMoon. The lights go out, and all is in darlmtss. Behind me a

SCIENCE

youngcoupklrissloudly.'Ihcyllhaveother things to think about &re the night is

A &rent perspective on the development of intelligcnce. Should we be analyzing intelligenqon the time scaleof an individual's progressor on an evolutionary scale?

over.

As the lights rise, a young woman (played by AineM e ) studies thestars through her tckscope. Her name, we will kam,isMarySnow,andshelivesinthe panelled house. Offsragc, a man's voice is heard, singing. H is name is Jacob Mercer (played by Juston Sharratt), and he has retumed h m Toronto afm a year's absence. Once, Jacob and Mary were lovers, until f h i l y shame led him to run away without telling her. Mary is engaged to anotherman,andhehasrrturncdtowin her badL 'Ihestoryisnotunf8miliar,theresolution is virmaylinevitabk.PlaywrightDavid

byWyloyaltiesandtheurgetoatonefbr thepainsoftheirparcnts.Maryhasmuch t o k b y m u m i n g t o Jacob,idudiogthe guarantee of a comfbrcabk huce h r her and her younger sister. Jacob has mote to gain, including retribution fbr his fither's disgrace by Mary's hnac's fither. 'Ihcmaninthemoon,shiningM FrenchhassethimselfadifEicultEaslr:totell the age-old tale of lost love r e g a i d whik above the salty sea shore, lights their diamaintainingthe interest ofa modem audi- logue and plays a major rok, as do the stars seen throughMary's telescope. Simultaneence. Su'plisingly, he not only d, but sets a s t a d d &r fbturestorytellersto ously the sky represent tradition and modmatch. It is ditllicult to imagine a better tale ern science, a thousand points hr the couofthesmoothconvergemeoftwohearts. pk's debate. W i l l true love prevail?It takes an hour Sdt-WbtcrMoon is a story told in one scqutncc,andamostentirrfyinthepast and a halfto findout,a continuous, gradual tense. Mary and Jacob engage in psycho- chamaer metamorphosis b r Mary as she iogicalshadow-boxing.Pczsonalnarrativcs has her ptrsonalbarrim swept down,one aretheirprimarymcansofattack,asMary byone, throughJacob's rekntksself-saksaicstoconvincebothJacobandhuself manship. David French has penned a suberbly that sbe no longer loves him, and Jacob subtle Mary that Aine Magtnnis handles PWon Mary's uB"EMEafi= YFnearly flawkssly. Mary is a 6rey draacoer, ticbatuntom~her-. naturebut As the play ptogresscs, it is apparent arralisticwith an-tativc t h a t t h e i r r o m a n c t i s ~ n o t o n l y b y softspotsthatJacobtakesfidladvantageof. Jamb is a less complicated chuacaer: eachother,blltbythcirfimilicsaad~ mcmosicsofwhodyrusedtobe. J d i s his intentions are obvious from the moYet he is a surprisa t r a d i ~ w h i l t M a r y w r r r e s a m ~ment he walks o-. naodanandnhrratlvllik.Botharedrivcn inglyinatlligtntandslyrnanwhohaadks

FEATURES photo coultesy of UW Drama

his pursuit like a game of chess, complete with gambits and a clever final d a . As Jacob, Juston Sharrat is only occasionally we&, the Ncwf;oundland accents that the actors are b d to assume sometimes inmfere with his proper emotional ischamaer, too, is the lesser of delivery. H the pair, serving as merely a stable catalyst fbr Mary's onstage development. It's a realistic characm, though, one that most men can idcntifj with. This may not be a politically correct story, but it is one that many of us have

P%e 15 A brief examination of the many ELccs who have played the role ofthe greatest spy in 6lm W r y : James

Bond.Thoughhehascrmrraincdus fbrdecades,thequestionmustbe raised: should he just retire?

SPORTS P%e 17 The Second Annual Canadian Uni-

versityUhimateChvnpioashipsate

b ~ w h e t h e r ~ ~ ~ l n I a uComingtouwthiswccltmdCul y ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ -

11or not. When the conclusion comes, it is

marlrcdwiththesamesubtktyastherestof theplay. It is a testimonyto both the powa of David French's writing and the acting ability of Magennis Sharatt that such a . . tand play can keep one's visuayrattention captive for such a relatively Long tinu.

Snit-Wntcr Moon is a complttcly absorbiiandabsoluatly btlievabkchamaer study, and highIycccy)mmctaded. Wk6c UWI)rrrmnkC@~~~t8884908fitick#. SlOgnmrrlpuMic, $8 h.

Waterloo defeat the defending champs h m Carkton?

ON-GOING /

TUESDAYS To become a better public speaker, read in public and build your confidence, join the Christopher Leadership Course. This course begins Sept. 17 to Nov. 26/96 from 7 to 10 p.m. Students $90.00 (books included), adults $110. For more info call Joanne at (519) 7446307. Every 2nd and 4th Tuesday starting Oct. 8. Drop in Support Group -women sexually assualted as teen/adult. Emmanuel United Church 1:OO - 3:Q0 pm. Info 571 -O? 21. Every Tues. & Wed. 10 week course designed to prepare people writing the Test of English as a Foreign Language exam. Sept. 24 to Nov. 27196 from 2:00 to 4:30 p.m. Register at International Student offiie NH2080 or call ext. 2814 for details. THURSDAYS An English Language Lab/class. Sept. to Dec. in Modern Languages from 130 to 2:20 p.m. Students, faculty, staff and spouses welcome. For info call International Student Office ext. 2814. HOPE is an action group dedicated to changing attitudes and increasing awreness on issues related to body image, dieting, etc. Next meetings are Oct. 10 and 24 at 530 p.m. in room 2t33, SLC. Details call Laurie 8861125. FRIDAY English Conversation Class in Needles Hall 2080. Sept. to June from 2:00 to 4:OO p.m. Students, faculty, staff and spouses welcome. For info call International Student Office at ext. 2814 SUNDAYS Emmanuel United Church Young Adults Group welcomes university students. Service 1 O:30 am. Social Group 7:00 pm. 22 Bridgeport Rd. (corner of Albert and Bridgeport} FASS Writers Meetings: join fellow writers, comedians and Thespians in the creation of the 35th Anniversary, FASS ‘97 Script! This year’s theme is King Arthur. ML104, 7-9 p.m.

St. Paul’s United College has rooms available for Winter ‘97 and Spring ‘97 terms. Please call 885-l 460 or drop by for application forms and a tour! The Faculty of Applied Health Sciences is pleased to announce the opening of the UW-CMCC Chiropractic Research Clinic in the new addition to BC Matthews Hall. Call888-4567ext. 5301 for an appt. Rooms in the Village Residence are available for immediate occupancy. Inquire at the Housing Off ice, Village 1 or phone 888-4567 ext. 3704 or 3705 for further information on the villages. English as a Second language, Secondary School Credits, and Upgrading classes for adults at St. Louis Adult Learning Centres. 75 Allen St. E. Waterloo 745-1201 or 291 Westminster Dr.N.Cambridae 650-1250 Padania Players needs plays to perform! Any local playrights with short witty scripts please bring them to the Imprint office. Please attach name and phone number. Attention Bluevale Alumnl!6Cl’s25th Reunion is May 30 - June 1197. The Reunion committee is presently compiling a mailing list. It is important that they receive your address now. Please write the school c/o 25th Reunion, 80 Bluevale St. N. Waterloo, N2J 3R5, call the Hotline at 650-0569 or e-mail at http:/www.sentex.net/-dabrykys/ bci.reunion. Renlson Collegeis now aapting residence applications from undergraduate students for both the winter and spring terms in 1997. For further information, please contact the Residence Office, Renison College at 884-4404, ext. 611.

The FASS Fall Kick-off! The fun starts now as we write the script, design the sets and plan the parties for our annual Musical Comedy in February. DC1 301, 7:30 p.m. http://math.uwaterloo.ca\-fass The Depressive & Manic-Depressive Association for Waterloo Region is a selfhelp, support group. We provide info, education & support to anyone who has the illness as well as family members and friends. For info call 884-5455. Does the thought of exploring new cultures, making new friends, eating new foods, gaining a greater understanding of the world or imporving your language skills interest you? Then come and attend the INTERNATIONAL WORK ABROAD FORUM on Oct. 31/96 hosted by Career Services in the Student Life Centre. For more info contact Elisabeth Adrian at x4047 or eadrian@nhl adm.uwaterloo.ca Distance Education Deadline-Winter’97 The deadline for applying was Oct. 15196. New this year is a “late application period” from Oct. 16 to Nov. 4196. A late fee of $25 is required to process your application during this period. Coop students on a work term in Jan. should apply now. Faculty Approval is recommended before submitting an application with appropriate tuition to the Distance Education Office, cornerof Columbiaand PhillipStreets. University of Library Electronic Data Services has revised office hours and added some service effective Oct. 15/96. The new off ice hours (Porter Library Room 222) are: Tues. lo:30 am - i 2:30 pm; Wed. 3:30 pm - 4:30 pm. Please contact the UMD Library @ x2795 for specific times.

Concordia Club Award-available to 3rd year Regular or 3A Co-op Germanic & Slavic. Deadline: Jan. 31/97

Faculty of Engineerinct: Andersen Consulting Scholarshipavailable to 38. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Canadian Hospital Engineering Society’s Scholarship-available to 3B. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Canadian Posture and Seating Centre Scholarship-available to all. Deadline: Oct. 1 l/96 Consulting Engineers of Ontario Scholarship-available to all 3B. Deadline: Mar. 31197 John Deere Limited Scholarship-available to 3B Mechanical. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 D&an Scholarship-available to 4A Civil. Deadline: Feb. 28/97 Randy Duxbury Memorial Awarct-available to 38 Chemical. Deadline: Mar. 31/ 97 S.C. Johnson d Son Ltd. Environmental Scholarship-available to 3rd year Chemical. Deadline: May 31/97 Ontario Professional Engineers Foundation Undergraduate Scholarshipavailable to ail 2B & 3B based on extracurricular and marks. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 3B Civil,Water Resource Management students. Deadline: May 31/ 97

Faculty of Environmental Studies

SCHNARSHIPS

Applications for the following scholarships are being accepted during the Fall term, Refer to Section 4 of the Undergraduate Calendar for further criteria. Application forms are available in the Student Awards Off ice, 2nd Floor, Needles Hall.

ALL FACULTIES: Doreen Brisbin Award-interested females entering 4th year in Spring or Fall 1997 in an Honours program in which women are currentlyunder-represented, Deadline:Apr.30/97 Don Hayes Award-for involvement/contribution to athletics and/or sports therapy.Deadline:Jan. 31/97 Leeds-Waterloo Student Exchange Program Award-students to contact John Medley, Mechanical Engineering. Mike Moser MemorialAward-available to 3rd or 4th year based on extracurricular and financial need. Deadline: Jan. 10197 Tom York Memorial Award-available to all for short fiction-not essays. Students to contact St. Paul’s United College for further information. Deadline: Dec. 31196

Facultv of Applied Sciences:

Health

Mark Forster Memorial Scholarship-available to 3rd or 4th year Kinesiology. Deadline: Jan. 31/97 Michael Gellner Memorial Scholarshipavailable to 38 Kinesiology or Health Studies. Deadline: Mar. 31/97 Robert Haworth Scholarship-completion of 3rd year in an honours program in resource management related to Park Planning and Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage or Outdoor Recreation. Deadline: May 31197 Kate Kenny Memorial Award-available to 4A Kinesiology with an interest in rehabilitative medicine. Deadline: Oct. 31/96 Ron May Memorial Award-available to 3rd or 4th year Recreation. Deadline: Oct. 1 l/96 RAWCO-available to 2nd,3rd or 4th year Recreation and Leisure Studies. Deadline: Jan 31/97

Faculty of Arts: Arts Student Union Award-available to all Arts students. Deadline: Oct. 31/96

Shelley Ellison Memorial Award-available to 3rd year Planning. Deadline: Nov. 29/96 John Geddes Memorial Award-available to ERS, Geography and Planning. Deadline: Oct. 31/96 Robert Haworth Scholarship-available to 36 Park Planning and Management, Recreation, Natural Heritage and Planning. Outdoor Education. Deadiine: May 31/97 Marcel Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 3rd year Environment & Resource Studies, Planning, Water Resource Mgt. Deadline: May 31197

Faculty of Science: Davld M. Forget Memorial Award in Geology-available to 2A Earth Science, see department. S.C. Johnson & Son Ltd. Environmental Scholarship-available to 3rd year Chemistry. Deadline: May 31197 Marc81 Pequegnat Scholarship-available to 38 Earth Science/Water Resource Mgt. Deadline: May 31/97

LIBRARYTOURS & WI)RKSH(>DS

Tuesday, Ott 22 - 12:30 pm Dana Porter Library - Fine Arts Workshop Wednesday, Ott 23 - 12:30 pm Dana Porter Library - Film Studies Workshop 2:30 pm Davis Centre Library - CDROM -Drop-in Clinics Thursday, Ott 24 - lo:30 am Dana Porter Library - CD-ROM Drop-in Clin-

lndlviduals and student organlzations to promote spring break trips. Earn money and free trips. Call Inter-Campus Programs l-800327-6013 or http://www.icpt.com Cash paid nightly for experienced sales repsifundraisers 6 days/ week 5:30 to 8:30 pm. $8/hr guaranteed. Call today, start tomorrow. Kent 1-800-447-l 826. Babysitter wanted for Sat. evenings and occasional weeknights. References required. Call Heidi at 884-0703.

Lose weight, lose inches, feel great. Call Sandi. (800) 322-9702. Shy, well established young man wishes to meet sweet vouno lady, shy and petite, romance-minded. Let talk 578-0061. * ” Expecting? Consider adoptlon. We would love to have a family but are unable to conceive. We would provide a loving and stable hbme for your child. Confidentiality important and vet ooen to communication. {Adoption procedure cbndt&d by legal co&sel) Please call l888-463- 1120.

- adorable pets, hypoallergenic, costs. The exotic pet for the 90s -

Q Q Q Experienced

Facultv of Mathematics:

African Pygmy Hedgehogs odorless, very low maintenance $50.00. Call Jim at 888-862t.

Andersen Consulting Scholarshipavailable to 38 Math. Deadline: Mar. 311 97 Bell Sygma Computer Science Awardavailable to 4th year Computer Science. Deadline: Oct. 31/96 Electrohome 75th AnniversaryScholarship-available to 36 Computer Science. Deadline: Mar. 31197 K.C. Lee Computer Science Scholarship-available to 26 Computer Science. Deadline: Nov. 29196 Sun Life of Canada Award-available to 2nd year Actuarial Science. Deadline: Nov. 29/96

Q @) -

LSAT-MCAT-GMAT-GRE on campus PREP! Flexible formats including weekends for $195. instant info: prep@ istar.ca or http:/ /www.prep.com. Richardson - Since 1979 - l-800-41 O-PREP. LSAT-MCAT-GMAT-GRE: Intensive 20-hr weekend seminars. Proven test-taking strategies. Personalized professional instruction. Comprehensive seminar packages for only $225. Oxford Seminars l-800-269-6719. -

tutor available to help in calculus, physics, math and German. Call 886-2928. Guelph to University of Waterloo, Weekdays. To arrive at U. of W by approximately 8:30 am. Departure time negotiable. 515-7670567 C-CELL CREATINE MONOHYDRATE tested regularly at over 99% pure. If you haven’t tried creatine then you don’t know how much better you could be. 33Og-$51 .OO; 5OOg-$75.00 ; lOOOg$134.00. Premium Whey Protein 9089 (2 lbs.)-$37.00. Chocolate, strawberry and vanilla. Cold high speed drying and a filtered +ion exchange procedure. All taxes are included. High quality products by J.&R. Nutruition in Vancouver. Call Harold after5 p.m. at l-51 9893-9340.

._ ,: Y

Bibles, 50 languages. Fall sale 25% off October 24 to November 2. Additional 5% discount with this ad. Canadian Bible Society Store, Weber at College, Kitchener. 743-5590.

DEADUNE FORCLASSIFIEDS is Mondays at5 p.m.attheIMPRINT officeSK1116 CLASSIFIED RATES: student rates: $3.120wordsL15$ after 20/t GST non-student: $5.120wordsl.25$ after 20/t GST business (student, non-student): $10.120words/

.2!3tafter2O/t GST

STUDENT EMPfOYMENT oPPouru/wllEs The following employment opportunities are now available. Interested applicants should respond directly to the contact indicated. Projectionist 81 Camera OperatorsAudio Visual Centre $9.00/hr. Flexible hours. Preference given to students with 4 terms to work. Contact Lenora Wilson at Ext. 5114 or report to the Audio Visual Centre Eng 2 1309.

V for Vic-Tori

IMPRINT The UW Student Newspaper StudentLZfeCentre,Rmmllf6

Coap votes make the difference in VPAF bydection

U~ersityofW~~

Waterkm,OntarbNZL3Gl 51%Friday October 18, 1996 . Volume 19, Number 14 ISSNO70&7380

Editorial E&or in Chief Assistant Editor Forum Editor

News Editor News Assistant Arts Editor Arts Assistant Sports Editor Sports Assistant Features Editor Science Editor Photo Editor Photo Assistant WWW Page Editor systems Administrator Proofreaders

Board Sandy Atwal Greg Picken Ryan C&n-Wing Peter Lenardon Greg K&chick James Russell Patrick Wilkins Jeff Peeters Ryan Pyette Tim Bondarenko Andrew Krywaniuk Gillian Downes Joe Palmer Klaus Steden Stephen Johnston

Mary Ellen Foster Rob Van Kruistum Emily Bruner Bernhard Wall Mike Owen

Staff Business Manager Advertising/Production Advertising assistant

Marea Willis Laurie Tigert-Dumas Tasmina Pate1

Distribution

by Peter hnardon Imprintstaff I

n a weak display of democracy, Tori Harris was elected to the position of Vice President Administration and Finance after two days of voting. Only 545 of the 14,863 students eligible to vote participated in the election. Harris won by a margin of 57 votes, or approximately 10 per cent of the total votes cast. Predictably, each candidate had astrong showing in their own faculty, with Harris taking 86 per cent of the votes in Applied Health Sciences and Devallenjoying 76 per cent of the Science vote. counting only the votes on campus, Harris won by a single vote. The deciding sector of the vote was students on co-op work terms. Having only the information in the candidates’ mailout packages, 67 per cent of students on work term voted for Tori Harris. ccI put quite a bit of time into [my mailout platform,]” said Harris. She also remarked that the emphasis in her mailout was experience with the Federation of Students, while Devall highlighted her work experience within a number of corpora-

tiOnS.

Voter turnout was disappointing, even for a by-election. Only 3.5 8 per cent of the

James Russell Peter Lenardon Ryan Pyette David Lynch Jeff Peeters Jeff Robertson

List

Mike Downing, Raelene Driscoll, Chris Edginton, Karsten W. Gitter, Sonya Hardman, Robert Jackson, Andrew Kennedy, Justin Kominar, Paul Kry, Dave Lynch, Tony Martins, Justin Matthews, Kelly McMaster, Mike McNulty, Gord Moore, Todd Pettigrew, Paul Rencoret, Andrea Russell, Tara Schagena, Astrid Sealey, Fayyaz Vellan, WPIRG, The Parking Lot is Full

Hamis enjoying her good fortune in the traditimal fashim. photo

over fourteen thousand students eligible to vote cast a ballot. Harris put the low turnout into perspective. “1 don’t know which is better, a low number of educated voters who vote or a lot of people voting who just happened to be near the voting area.” Federation Vice President Internal, Julie Primeau acknowledged the lack of interest in student politics.

by Peter knardon

She mentioned the large number of students talking during theImprint forum and the apparent lack of knowledge of Federation ofstudents activities illustrated by the answers in last week’sGz~~&~tion. Next weekend, Harris and the existing Fed executive will go on a retreat in order to teach the new VPAF about the job and the issues that currently surround it.

Legal action. proceecnng

Board of Directors

Contribution

James Russell Jeff Robertson

President Vice-President Secretaty Treasurer Director at Large Staff Liaison

Former CASA ,employee may face criminal charges by Greg K&chick Imprint staff regress has been made in the case of Patrick Fitzpatrick, who faces possible legal action over funds unaccounted for in the treasury of the Canadian Alliance of Student Associations (CASA). Previously the board of directors and members of CASA were experiencing fmtration at the Crown’s inaction on the case. This past Wednesday October 16, however, the file was given to a detective, and the wheels have been set in motion for charges to be laid. Fitzpatrick served as Atlantic regional director for the CASA lobby group in the fall of 1995, and later became director of The Natio.nal Conference on Post Secondary Education. This conference was incor-

porated separately from CASA, and intended to seek out firnds from private sources. Fitzpatrick informed CASA that he had received funds from the New Brunswick government, but still needed a loan to get the conference going. CASA responded by lending the conference $10,000. Within two months Mr. Roe Macfarlane of the New I3runswick Department of Advanced Education had written the conference, requesting them to cease claiming that the New Brunswick government had given them money. In fact, no provincial funds had been given, and fixthermore within two months the $10,000 loaned to the conference by CASA was down to $1823.60, less than $2000 of which could be accounted for. CASA immediately demanded an explanation, but Fitzpatrick was not avail-

able, having left the province of,Ontario. The discrtipancies in the conference accounting include: l Fees paid by the Saint’I’homasUniversity Student Union, who was approached by Fitzpatrick and asked to pay their CASA membership dues, in the amount of $1116, to the CASA national conference. The cheque was cashed by Fitzpatrick, but CASA has yet to receive either the money or an accounting of the funds. l A CASA cheque for $225 was made out to Fitzpatrick personally and signed for himself, though he had no signing authority at the time. The cheque was cashed and the money remains unaccounted for. l Funds from CASA were advanced to Fitzpatrick to cover expenses arising from l

continued to page 6

NEWS

Friday, October 18, 1996

IMPRINT,

mowing on PI1

SERVICES

Camera Ojxcura to showcase student photography by Dave Fisher special to Imprint

FREE Initial Consultation & Photographs if required Appointment Only Miillw @+I + Travel Service * Permanent Resident Applications * Student Authorizations * Employment Authorizations * Sponsorship Applications - After Landing

leet someone special or just have fun on the phone!

l-on-l LIVE Connections FREElOCAl @ILL

his coming week offers an exceptional opportunity for Imprint and the university community to become a little more intimate with one another. On Thursday and Friday, October 24 and 25, Imprint presents the photographic exhibit Coma Obscure in the Student Life Cent&s multi-purpose room. Showcasing an assortment ofphotographs from the Imprint and Chevron photo archives, the purpose of the exhibit is to share snapshots from the paper’s past and hopAlly entice students to volunteer for the immediate present and Wure. . The initiative for the exhibit actually began three or four years ago. Rumours had circulated around campus for ages about Led Zeppelin- playing before a small audience in Kitchener and Jim Carrey’s free stand-up performances in the Campus Centre. The collection of past bound volumes of Imprint and its predecessorlk Chm provided verification that such events were in fact real, and afier investigating these resources the photo department came up with the idea of a display to document its past. Sadly many ofthe valuable photographs and negatives that appeared in past issues were nowhere to be found due to loss and a ruthlessly inefkient photo file, so the initiative was abandoned. New technology, however, sparked a renewed interest in the project. Currently in the process of archiving its photographic catalog on CD-ROM, Imprint _was obiiged to dig through the past in an attempt to bring the new archive as up-to-date as possible. It’s from the renewed inventory that the exhibit is comprised.

Civil liberties bwyer September 28,1972.

Wilkam

Kunstkr

at IWmadti~ phato

Most of the photos in Camem Ob~~ra are indeed obscure, having never in fact been previously published. Many other photographs were discovered without accompanying negatives. These have been cleaned up as best as possible and presented almost asgood as they looked when they were printed ten or twenty years ago. The selection of the photo-

Theatre, by Gord

graphs was comprised by both aesthetic merit and/or documentary value. Special attention was also given to subject matter that best reflected the nature of the campus newspaper and therefore focuses on news, arts, sports, and campus life. In addition to the exhibit in the Student Life Centre, the photos can also be accessed through Imprint’s website at http://imprint.uwaterloo.ca/

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IMPRINT,

Friday,

October

18, 1996

Do we have clubs this term! s VP Internal, every day I spend a lot of time talkA ‘ng to students &om the various organization on campus. The office ofthe VP Internal deals more specifically with the services, clubs, societies and residence Councils on campus, Over the past couple ofweeks I have been to many meetings where I have gained valuable experience and formed excellent connections. Time and time again I am made aware of the fact that our campus is full of wonderful people who, much like the Feds, are devoting their time to enhancing your experience here on this campus. EveryweekItrytotaDcalittle about these groups in order to help keep you up to speed about what is available out there. Quite often my discussion points toward the services which the Feds with the help of many volunteer provide. This week I want to tell you a bit about the other groups on campus that you may want to be involved with. Clubs - do we have clubs this term! There are about 50 in total ranging from cultural clubs, to clubs that like anime, to Christian clubs and anything in between! If vou are interested in seeing the ‘LU list of clubs available and want to get in touch with them, you can contact me at the Fed office (888-4042). I can also help you start a club if that is what

you are interested in! Societies - these are the amazing people that many of you may have seen during Frosh Week Xf you are interested in being involved in your own faculty, I: suggest that you get in touch with your society. They are truly wonder&l to work with and a great way to meet people. Residence Councils - speaking of wonde&l people. ..if you live in residence then you probably know who your Residence Council consists of These people help to plan events that can keep you occupied in your spare time (if you have any spare time that is!) It is one residence council in particular that has inspired me to write this column about various student organizations - Renison College. This past week Renison College invited me to attend their Thanksgiving dinner. It was at this dinner that the various floors in the residence donated food to the Feds’ Food Bank, As I have said time and time again, it is unfortunate that the times have changed in such a way that students actually need a Food Bank however it is fortunate that we are able to provide for it. I would like to thank Renison College along with anyone else who has generously donated to the Food Bank. It is students like yourselves that make the existence of this service possible.

kxperience co-op by Andrew Kennedy special to Imprint the start of the workterm is still two months away, it’s never too early to start thinking about what can you do to ensure that you’re getting the best experience possible. By the best experience possible, I mean a positive experience that will benefit both yourself in finding future jobs and also the employer paying your salary. As it turns out, there are seireral things. The first is to have some clear and objective goals for yourself during the work term. Whether your goal is to learn AutoCAD or to produce better documentation for Microsoft Word, having clear expectations for your experience will ensure that you have a positive workterni. It is also important to communicate these objectives to your employer. lfthey aren’t aware of what your goals are over the course of the work term, they may not be

able to help tailor your work so that it fits within these objectives. As well, through this communication, they may he able to adjust your expectations if they are too ambitious, or not ambitious enough. Over the course of this communication, you should expect your employer to indicate some clear expectations that they hold. After all, they’re the one paying your salary and have no doubt hired you for a purpose. Perhaps the most important step is to ask for feedback. Sure, there’s a co-op evaluation that every employer fills out at the end of the workterm, but that is too late for you to change any of your behaviour during the current workterm. This could be critical to satisfying your employer. At the very least, asking for a midterm evaluation of your performance could go a long way to ensuring that you are a productive and happy employee and that .your

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sure that future co-ops are well informed. The jast point is to have your questions answered There may be times when the person who can answer your question is very busy. The key is to be persistent and make sure you get the answer Interrupt the person at an appropriate time and don’t let them put you off. If you don’t, you’ll just end up sitting there, wasting your time and their money. While following these keys doesn’t guarantee the best workterm of your life, it may lead to that, or a more positive experience than ifyou hadn’t taken these steps. Any feedback? Write to sac@undrgrad.math.uwaterl~.ca or post to uw.coop.sac. Students Advising Co-op meets every Tuesday at 530pm in Needles Hall 1030. l

Note: the article in the &toher 4 issue of Imprint, ‘(A Co-op Guarantee” was intended to be an opinion piece to provoke discussion about the co-op fee.

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empioyer is happy with your performance. In this evaluation, you should ask for areas needing improvement and also suggest to your employer any ways that they could change your job to ensure that you are a happy employee. More frequent feedback is certainly not out of the question. Further to this, provide feedback to your employer at the end of the workterm regarding what they did well and what they can improve upon This should be an integral part of the evduation process undertaken at the end of the workterm. This can help to ensure that any future students have a more positive work experience. Ensure that you know where to find supplies and the policies of the company surrounding any issues which may Sect your job, such as expenses. Ifyouknow this information in advance, you will be much more productive. Some employers have an orientation session for their new employees. If your employer doesn’t, suggest to them that they should and help them develop one. It’ll help youfind out the information and en-

CS, Engineering or IS majors planning zt future as ASSOCIATE SOFIWARE ENGINEERS or ASSOCLUE CONSWTMS shouldattendour:

Friday, October 25

Friday, October 18, 1996

continued

from

page 3

a Board of Directors, meeting in Ottawa. No money or receipts were returned following the meeting, and once again the money remains unaccounted for. Immediately following the discovery ofthis situation, CASA’s board of directors sought legal counsel and contacted the KMP. From there the file bent through various police departments and Grown attorneys, who caused con&m among the CASA Board of Directors and members with their perceived inaction on the case, Following an October 6 news release born CASA on this inaction, however, the file immediately ended up in the hands of Crown attorney Kevin Kenell. Later, on October 16, Detective Ed Smith of the Fredericton Police Fraud Department was reassigned to the file, and he is currently working towar+ gathering a criminal case against Fitzpatrick.

Fitzpatrick has maintained that he has an explanation for all of the financial discrepancies, but has so fu been unable to produce any receipts. For instance, with regards to the missing $1116 from Saint Thomas University, Fitzpatrick told the Bwrm&kim, tie University of New Brunswick student newspaper, that he didn’t have the receipts. Y will have to pass on this one for now. I have got basically a dollar-by-dollar breakdown of items but I will have to go over it at home before I can give a clear answer? CASA, however, feels it cannot take his word for this. Furthermore, to quote the press release from CASA dated October 6, “Even beyond the question of criminal liability, this process must proceed so that he can offer studen& an explanation for the actions he took while holding elected office? PatrickFitzpatrickiscuxrently a staff photographer at the BW?ZtibH.

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The forum pages allow members of the University of Waterloo community to present their views on various issues through letters to the editor and longer comment pieces. The opinions expressed in columns, comment pieces, letters and other articles are strictly those of the authors, not of Imprint. Imprint is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint, Student Life Centre, Room 1116, University of Waterloo, Waterloo, Ontario,,N2L 3Gl.

A PenWarmedinHell

ewis Lapham’s halo shines brightly on the world of journalism. The editor ofHtive+s Magazine is undoubtedly an intelligent, thoughti, lucid wordsmith but quite frankly I’ve never been all that impressed with any of his columns. While that may cause some to label me a simpleton, I’ve just never found his writing relevant to any of my personal experiences. . *until this week. In this month’s Havev’s, Lapharn laments the lack of modern day Mark Twains and Henry Menckens to sarcastically skewer the vain and arrogant politicians and celebrities of today. In his piece, Lapham notes that his views are shared with some editors he bumps into in the Algonquin hotel. Lapham dutifully notes that these editors wouldn’t have the guts to print Mencken’s works even if he were alive. While most are acquainted with Twain, H.L Mencken may be a more obscure figure, but he is considered by many to be the greatest newspaperman of the twentieth centur$ His coverage of the Scopes Monkey Trial (legal watershed of the classic evolution vs. creation debate) is legendary. He ‘wrote with the same pen asTwain, the one “warmed in hell,” and few today can match his vitriol. But Mencken would be castigated today because he wrote derogatory things about Jews and women, making him a serious liability for any modern newspaper. For readers of his work, his attitude towards women and Jews isn’t surprising. Yes, he wrote derogatory things about them, but he wrote derogatory things about abso&$ everyone. What struck me most about Lapham’s column was not his clever obsenrations about how Mencken and Twain might handle today’s vainglorious (and dim) political machinations, but rather his criticism over the iack of sarcasm, wit and irony in today’s media, be it television, newspaper or magazine. Lapham hits on the problem when he writes of columnists and reporters who prefer to write from a position Lapham calls Viewing with alarm.” Reporters would rather make concerned comments than laugh outright at politicians, but sometimes (as Twain and Mencken knew) laughter is the best medicine for what ails the state. Lapham unfairly disparages modern writers such as P. J. O’Rourke who, in my opinion, does a fine job of carrying on Mencken’s tradition, but admittedly there & something missing. Reading O’Rourke, it’s clear what subjects are taboo, and reading Mencken, it’s obvious that he didn’t know what the word taboo meant. It’s not that some subject matter is completely off-limits. Watch the classic film The P~~&cers or read some Lenny Bruce ifyou thing Jews andNazi’s simply can’t be made fun of. But the aforementioned works are difficult to pull OE The point, is to poke fL.n in an intelligent way. Today’s supposedly humorous columnists such as Dave Barry and the Timonto Star’s Joey Slinger bring a dull, dull wit to the printed page. They simply aren’t clever enough to get away with offending people. It would be wrong to suggest that the move away from being an equal opportunity offender is strictly due to some sort of infringement on freedom of speech. It’s really just a matter of the fact that by and large, sarcastic writers have rareIy been able to generate the permanent, large following. Their work simply isn’t as popular as the watered down pseudo-Setield slice-of-We crap propogateii by Mr. Barry, and that is a loss to all of us. As Lapham concludes, when Twain said that satire preserved men from being ‘%hrivelled into sheep,” it didn’t occur to him that lamb’s wool would come to be so much admired.

p The grinch that stole Thanksgiving T

hanksgiving is a time to give thanks for all that we have., Oops, make that had. Everybody knows that most students go home for this celebration. They visit friends they haven’t seen since September, play with the family dog, eat their mothers’ turkey, and foad up the car with groceries from the parents’ pantry. Tt is also the time, unfortunately, when narrow-minded, opportunistic, bottom-feeding assholes choose to prey upon those of us who Cchave”and make us those who “have-not,” Let us think for a minute and pause to answer a few questions. Do students have the money to replace their stolen property? Do students have tt-remoney to make the repairs On the houses they rent to make them secure? Do landlords give a shit about the things their student tenants own? Can students afford to be burgled? . I The answer to all these questions is invariably and resoundingly no. This past weekend was one of those weekends when a number of people did get their houses broken into and their belongings stolen, or worse. Mine . was one of them. Sure, Pm upset about the fact that some of my CD’s were pilfered, as were the belongings of some of my housemates, but the real kicker is that my landlord could care less, Sure he says that he is sorry, but will he pay to make the building more secure? No, it’s not his responsibility, he says. Now it is up to my housemates and myself to secure the house that we are renting from fixther burglaries. Another friend of mine had his house broken into this past weekend and all they did was set fire to the curtains in one of the rocxns. What kind of brain-dead, immature cretin would actually plan \ out and execute such an act, and

to what end? They got no financial gain and you definitely couldn’t put it on your resume. They did however, get the right to brag to their fellow troglodytes about how they have learned to master fire. The loss of physical property is really of little or no concern to many people who have their houses burglarized. Insurance, her a little bit of a fight, will cover most of the losses. The real concern comes from the fact that people who once felt safe in what was known astheir home away from home, now have to worry about leaving their places for the weekend or about being lefi home alone. The threatofbeing robbed or burgled will always be there in the back of their minds. That is the greatest crime. L Waterloo is a city composed largely of students, and most of the business here is geared to this end. Those businesses are staffed by other members of the community who in turn need the students and their money in order to keep their jobs. If the students are spending their money on instiance deductibles and replacing stolen items, what is that doing for local business? Sittinghereandcallingthethieves nameswillreallydo no good. Most of them probably don’t read all that much. But what will do some good is ifpeople don’t buy stolen goods, ifpeople willget to know theirneighbours and keep an eye on their houses if&y are gone, and if landlords take responsibility for securing their tenants’ properties. In a pmgre&ive city like Kitchener-Waterloo it is sad to see that petty crime like this still occurs, but the reality is that it never really went away. And unfortunately neither did those who commit it.

Imprint welcomes letters to the editor from students and all members of the community. Letters should be 500 words or less, typed and double-spaced or in electronic form, and have the author’s name, signature, address and phone number for verification. Letters received via electronic mail must be verified with a signature. All material is subject to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish letters or articles which are judged to be libellous or discriminatory on the basis of gender, race, religion or sexual orientation. Opinions expressed are those of the individuals and not csf Imprint.

J a P anese Whispers To tbe E&w, We were delighted to see a review of a Japanese dictionary, owning and using several ourselves. It was a refreshing change from the sex/violence peccadillo of “Beating in the Guelph Library” and many outdated music reviews. Reviews of dictionaries are far from unknown, Some journalists list new words h the OED or Merriam-Webster’ every year. We would like to see more reviews of this nature in the future. Your article was a good start, bu t somewhat superficial. This probably results from a lack of knowledge about the Japanese language andother Japanese-English dictionaries. For example, how does the $9.50 Random House dictionary compare with the $6.99 paperback that I have at home? Are the ccJapanese characters” just hira&na and katakana, or are kanji used as well? Does it define the previous terms and have a small grammatical reference? Does it use a traditional method of romanization, or use a bizarre system such as the MerriamWebster’s? It romanized “se?’ as ?ee”, causing some co&ion. We will return to that point shortly. Upon reading the third-to-last paragraph, we were seized with a burning desire to find out what the Japanese word for “sex” was. Despite having watched thousands of hours of anime between the two.of us, and possessing many Japanese language references we were unable to decide if Japanese had a word for %ex”. According to the Merriam-Webster, the kanji usually romanized “se?’ and pronounced like the English word “say” covers both ‘gender’ and ‘the sexual act’. We hope that this clears up the mystery and people will sleep easily, knowing the Japanese word for ‘sex’.

Gene

To the Editor, As a scientist, I feel I must respond to the flawed speculations in Andrew Kqwaniuk’s article ‘For Genetic Engineering’. The article speculates that the cause of homosexuality in humans is due to genetic mutation, to .‘erosion of our genes’. The argument goes that, as men have both X and Y genes, we have in our X genes the female ‘tendency to be sexually attracted to .*. men’. Now this argument might have some cogency, if homosexuality were restricted to men. It is not. Some women are attracted exclusively to women. Women do not have the male Y gene. If sexual attraction is wholly genetic, with attraction to women being encoded in the Y gene, as the aurhor su~ests that attraction to men is in the X gene, then women should never

be homosexual. The article continues speculating, suggesting that ‘reproductively speaking, homosexuality is unquestionably disadvantageous’. In one short phrase, the author suggests that he himself or science is om-

niscient, I strongly suspect the author isn’t omniscient. Science certainly isn’t. Science does not know which mutation is good or bad, aside from noting which mutations in the past have led to a species extinction. Evolution has the un-enviable problem of deriving its foresight exclusively from hindsight, “That didn’t work. It must be a bad mutation? Science can’t decide about mutations, unless that mutation is the cause of a species extinction. Sickle cell anemia is a case in point, where an apparently bad mutation has helped a group of humans survive the devastating illness, malaria. We must lwn to recognise science’s fbndamental limitations. Science cannot tell you the future. Science cannot answer the question, ‘Will this mutation be a bad one? Will this mutation cause the species extinction?” Only in hindsight can evoiution suggest whether a mutation is good or bad. Ifwe expect to use genetic engineering and other sciences for our collective benefit, we must become aware of those sciences’ limitations. Failure to do so will surely be to our collective detriment. As we become blinded to our own shortcomings and the shortcomings of our sciences, we all become Frankensteins. - Sbanvwn ilhwm ml--t Staulks

Campus Ret wrecked To the E&w,

useM tiormation about a program that many students use (and most students pay for), we get another CD review about some alternative band that only the author and his selected friends have heard of, just so they can say how rockin’ or crappy it was. Is this a representation of what the student body wants? Please promptly put back the Campus Recreation page in theImprint. It’s needed, it’s wanted, and it represents the student body more than any CD review or The Rant. (Sorry Dave, love the articles, but it’s true.) Find the space. A very disgruntled CR Co-ordinator,

Men impregnate

the words themselves which angered me but the obvious ignorance behind them, Warren-welcometothewondetiworld of contraception, where unplanned occurrences of pregnancy can be avoided! If a woman can accept the responsibility, along with her partner, of protecting herself’ against pregnancy, and ifshe’s emotionally and physically ready to have sex, then I see very little that should stand in her way. I think you need to put an end to this narrow-minded view of women you have in your head asbaby-making, frail, compliant females to Conform in a male-dominated world. It’s very convenient for you to pass off all the responsibility of pregnancy on a woman, when obviously you’ve failed to recognize that it was a man who helped her get into the mess in the first place. - Rebecca H&m

Fed

To tbe Ed&w,

To tbe Editor,

Re: Abstinence to Zachariah. Abortion aside, yes, women do have the choice whether or not to have sex. To base that decision on a woman’s readiness for pregnancy is another issue entirely, and quite frankly I think that’s an outrageously ridiculous siatement. The more I thought about the comment made by Warren Hagey, the more I realized that it wasn’t

Fed Hall can bite my cak! I’m glad I give my money to keep Fed Hall open each time I pay my tuition. I’m especially glad that when I actually wanted to have a beer at Fed last Saturday, October 5, there was a wedding in progress. That’s pretty freakin’ stupid, considering Fed is a student bar. No wonder that nobody ever goes to Fed l continued to page 10

I recenrly heard that the Imprint ws no longer offering a permanent page for Campus Recreation. Giving the paper the benefit of the doubt, I figured that there must be a reasonable explanation for this exclusion. Lack of space was not the reason I was looking for. Campus Recreation is a recognized program in the community that is the University of Waterloo. Over 300 students are employed by Campus Recreation, not to mention the many thousands of students, staff, and CR members that use the program each term. Not only does CR encompass intramuralsports, but also clubs, instructional programming, and leisure activities. I ask you this: How can there not be enough space for a program that involves a large percentage of the student population? This is a studentnewspaper the last time I checked. I can recall times when the Imprint was getting flack for not having a wide range of interests expressed in its pages. The replies I remember were that if people wanted to see things, all they had to db was submit. So, Campus Ret hires a Publicity Coordinator for such a thing. And what does the Imprint tell him? That he can now submit a mere 400 words (less than one article) per week, and there is still no guarantee that

it will

get published.

In the past, Campus Recreation had been given a full page, which I might add was promptly filled with coming events information, activity successes, League updates, and other interesting items that revolved around CR. Now, this can no longer be done. So instead of giving out

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defended When reading JamesRussell’s column entitled “Time To ch-e,” 1 was _-smed by - II fis _ racist, narrow-minded, and uninformed perSpeCtiVe. ChlCe again, Native people are forced to defend something that shouldn’t have to be justified. Unlike Mr. Russell, thoughtfGl people understand that the traditional way of life is a belief system that can be applied to any context. It was not what we did that was cctrad.Sonal,n rather it was how we did it. Everybody knows “traditional way of life” is not l&h-century living condi-

robbed of our land, language, and G&U.R. Consider that the average Native Person stiU suffers from a much lower standard of living than *eW average “Canadian” *Ose “big bucks” are PxttY Alsive. Mr. Russell insists on pointing out the exception, rather than examining what Native people suffer from as a whole - today and as part of an historical con~“Y+Z?resident0fthe130ardof Directors of the Imprint, I think it is his responsibilitv to aspire to some leveiof object&e jo&na.listic integrity instead of sensationalism. Take some time to read, research, and reflect before spewing something out in an effort to m&eadea&e and wi&outconsideration for who might be poisoned by what you wr.& . - C~A

Bmnt

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Wedon’tseeourwayoflifeas a ccchoice” that has to be made like yes or no. Rather, we see &fore us a struggle to find a balante benveen the traditional way of l&e and ccmodern” societv. Yes, today we will e&brace technology that makes our lives better and helps our communities, but with one major difference - on our terms. And yes, we * will fight to get the best deal we can for our people (something all Canadians work for), especially after being forced into “modernity” while being lied to and

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Bigdbucks for -Natives? TO the Editor, Once again, James Russell writes as a self-appointed expeit on a toPic he knows noting about. In his last article Time to Choose,” he asserts that if the

Friday, October 18, 1996 native peoplewant land and seffgovernment, they should give up modem technology and conveniences. Y do not completely buy the native victim ideology,” Russell writes, “Natives eagerly accepted European technology.” Russell fails to tell the whole story. When the Europeans udiscoveredn Canada, they asked natives to sign land claim treaties in return for such things as EuroPean technology and tax exemption. At this time, the native people neither used written commtication nor understood land ownership. In their eyes no one owns land, they just share it with nature. It seemed they were giving up nothing but an ccXn on a page in return for what the settiers had to offer. Russell asserts that some natives areusingtheirrightsfor such%ontraditional ends-profit.. .making some big bucks in the process? Tax exemption is one measly concessionnonnatives make in a binding contract that took away native hunting and fishing grounds, and forced them into smail reserves. How many native reserves are lavish paradises, reflectig the profit and big bucks they are supp&edly making at non-natives’ expense? Quoting again from Russell’s column, “Natives are demanding theretumoftheirtraditional huntinggrounds...but are they wi.Uing to relinquish their rifles and snowmobiles for bows and snowshoes?” Relinquish to whom, Mr. Russeli? The white-Anglo-SaxonEuropean-descendents of this land? Who has the inherent right to give and take away technology? The question should be this: if you want to keep the technology, are you willing to give up the iand we took and move to Europe? In your own words, me time for l

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of a haircut. Regarding an instance where a customer paid 111 female haircut price for a lb-inch trim after paying $40 for a hair-do: we wish to specify that the “hairdo” in question was a highlight procedure. The price, in addition to being inaccurately reported, included the cost of the chemical, two hours of delicate work, and the government-imposed taxes. The alleged amount of hair cut, a quarter inch, as quoted by the customer, would have been contradicted by the stylist had she been contacted about the issue. However, the amount of hair trimmed is inconsequential. We, like most salons, do not charge, according to the amount of hair lefi on the salon floor. The client, like all clients, was charged for the separate service the haircut involves. It may ease the minds of the students to know that the Apple II price list is reflective of student budgets. We too are students, we have families, and in response to other areas of the article, we know the rising cost of tuition and we know the cost of food. It is not by givin away free haircuts that the situation of’ lnf ation will be rectified. The client was invited by the Apple II manager to discuss her concerns. However, she refused a private meeting and opted to co-write an insulting md libellous ;trticle for Imprint. It is not in Apple IPs interest to belittle the authors of “Searching For Value”. Our intention is to provide the factual information needed to make the original article regarding your campus saion’s price and service practices complete. The staff of The Apple II Hairstylist look forward to seeing you in the near hture.

Library surveillance To the Editm, How many people relish having an attendant rummage through their bags when leaving the library? I doubt there are many. When is this university going to get a less intrusive and more effective system for nabbing would-be book thieves? There are many reasons why the currefit system is intolerable: 1) Invasion of privacy, 2) AssunVtion of guilt* 3) It is a waste of money. An electronic system would pay for it~lf. 4) It is ineffective. Each time I have left one of the libraries in my four years at UW, I could have “borrowed” a book without signing it out. I know of some women on campus who have accideny found a way to thwart the attendants’ quest for stolen hooks: leave some feminine hygiene products on top of your books. The male attendants especially will balk at the sight of such objects and let you go on your merry way. I have given four reasons why the current system must go. This letter is an informal challenge to the library administration to give one reason why we should keep the status quo. Let me guess -it will put a few people out ofwork?

If Jesus Christ gets to write in Imprint,theq thisgoddess should too. Imprint has too few female columnists and the recent homophobic letters that have raged in the paper demonstrate the need for some alternative perspective. I hope this column will be a voice for both the feminist and gay communities on campus. (Christian colleges youmay now quiver dutifully). Contrary to popular opinion, feminism is neither a four letter word nor the new “f’ word. The simplest defition of kninism asserts that we live in a world where women are devalued, that this is not f&, and that we muust fight to change this. Few women would disagree. So why do the majority of women feel alienated by the feminist movement? The answer is complex, but many women do not even have any first-hand experience of feminist organizations. A lot of their opinions about feminists are therefore drawn from the mass media, which is renowned for distorting feminist undertakings. The most biatant and well-known example ofwhich was the 1968 Miss America Protest where the image of the bra-burning feminist be-e forever imbedded in the mainstream mind. Not a single bra was burned at this protest. Some women threw bras into a garbage can, which isn’t quite as sensational as sending them up in flames as the dr&-

dodgers of the time were doing with their dra.&cards.Itwasablatantdi.stortionofthe truth and people continue to believe it. My personal favourite deftition of feminism is Nancy Miller’s assertion that feminism is the wish ccto articulate a selfconsciousness about women’s identity both as an ‘inherited cultural fact and as a process of socid construction,” This appe& to me because I believe men can use it as an example, too, as can any social group. Being a feminist is not the same as being a “man-hate?. Of course men have issues to dealwith, too. Women, bwever,continue to be systematically and systemically oppressed to a far greater degree than men are. It is easy to be complacent in one of the most liberated and s&e countries in the world, but Canadian women have still not achieved equality. For a lengthy list of all the reasons why feminism’s job is not yet done, drop by the UW Wornyn’s Centre and take a look at all the resources. It is located in Room 2102 of the Student Life Centre. You may be surprised to fmd that it is run by a group of dedicated women who are not in any way threatening, manhating, ugly or bitter. Rather, we are a -It&gmmd vu* diverse group of women who oppose sex- - Sta$crfApple II H~in-tylim conzptltertie ism, racism, homophobia, classism, .able- ~mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm~ ism, age-ism. . .yes, the list goes on forever. Check it out, you may be surprised.

continued from page 10 choice has come”, %..ie you willing to live with respect and tolerance for other cultures, and give up your ‘Cus vs. them,, stance? Are you willing to learn the facts about Canada’s history? Are you willing to make an effort to understand native culture, and admit their right to selfgovernment?

On a relaicl note. the letter “Sloanlv the Lonely,” is an unf& attack on Patrick Wilkins. In pointing out that the music was “technically petiek,” but %ck of movement,, spoiled the show, maybe we should realize that we are not getting what we paid for, unless you paid for an exact copy of the album. I% s&e Sloan did put ona stellar show in Toronto. I’m happy that the considerably larger record-buying population got their money’s worth. Too bad us rubes in the outback get the second-rate show. I’m sorry your favourite band was attacked Mr. Bekavoc, but maybe it’s a little sad that your devotion blinded you to the fact that you got ripped off.

- M&t HaMy 4A Civil zHJim+n&

Value

found

Tu the Editor, Ir seems that a growing concern in recent issues of Imprint has been the high cost related to being a student on the University of WaterGo campus. Yes, the book store is taking you for a ride, Fed Hall is losing money by the tens of thousands, and F&l Se&c& gouges you at every turn, We poor students can barely afford a Bombshelter beer to drown our sorrows in, J’m sorry, but I can’t believe that we don’t realize that there is a choice. If you don’t buy horn these LLServices,nthey can’t rip you off. These businesses realize they have a captive audience, and will abuse this monopoly until the students establish that they will not pay inflated p&s. Pack a lunch, buy your textbooks off campus, and feel fiee’to experience the free market off campus. Yes, I’m sorry that it will take a little effort, but that is the price you pay. As for these services that are funded by OUT money, maybe it’s time that our Federation of Students took action, instead of talking action. At least hire a decent D J for Fed Hall.

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In case you hadn’t heard (or seen), the Bank of Montreal is running another controversial ad campaign. ThLs time, the ad features bits of Bob Dylan’s “The Times They Are A-Changin.” You can imagine the idignant reaction of, well, everybody. John Haslett Cti, ultra-pompous television critic for De Globe and i’kfail, went on a tirade about it in the paper’s Thanksgiving Day edition. This was overblown rhetoric ifever I’ve seen it: “. . .the banks and other transnational corporations continue to try to rewrite and redefine cultural history? It gets better: ccFur&ermore, where does it leave those who are too young to have known that fascinating decade? .The fiercest loyalties of today’s teens and twentysomethings (those who discovered Dylan on AM radio) are primarily to the products of Nike, Disney and their ilk, and for them history has largely been reduced to a music video...” The horror, the horror. His article was followed by a deluge of letters shouting their approval. I’m just waiting for Report on Ba&ess Mi?fl&ze to do another cover story about a BOM ad campaign. The bank’s campaign is cynical and mangles 1960s ideals. Dub. It’s not the first, and it will not be the last. But I would stop short of saying it and other similar ads at&mpt to red&& cultural history. It’s an

advertisement. I would be surprised ifanyone bought it. What is more, if? got excited every time a corporation reekedof hypocrisy and twisted ideals to sell stuff, there would be no time lefi in the dav to do anything else. (Admittedly, you &id almost say the same thing about whenever there were babv boomers in the media with an inflated sense of their own importance) I thought the ad was laughable when I saw it, since even a poor twentysomething such as myself could recogti Dylan’s tune and think, wow, his ideals are not ones I would typically associate with a bank. All this thinking wetit on despite my fierce loytities to Disney and Nike, believe it or not. I even resisted the urge to Open a new account at the BOM. If this advertising is so offensive, then presumably it won’t work, and the BOM bill have to try something new. If rt 1s successf@ then I guess the boomers have themselves to blame. A lot of these al-legedly misguided teenagers and twentysomethings that Cuff refers to are their children. Go figure. As for CufYs worries about our having missed the 196Os, well, we Live in the 199Os, home of sobering reaky, f&ionable black, fashionable depression, and by far the angriest popular music ever. Even with our short attention spans, we may not be quite as gullible as he&inks.

WPIRG Temagami Rally Local citizens opposed to the Ontario government’s decision to openTemaga.mi’s old growth forest to logging and mining are being urged to join a march down King Street organized for Saturday, October 19th by students from the University of Waterloo, WiKrid Laurier University, and local high schools. The march will begin in Waterloo Park near Rink in the Park on Seagrams Dr. at I2 noon and proceed down King Street to Speaker’s Corner in Kitchener. Temagami represents l/3 of North America’s old growth forest and contains a wide array of rare and uncommon species -- 43% of this is slated for logging. “We don’t want to end logging in Ontario’s forests, but we do want to see it done carefully and with respect for protecting biodiversity -- failure to do so threatens both our economic and ecological future,” says Jason Whitfield, volunteer with WPIRG’s Forestry Working Group. The Temagarni and Latchford Economic Development tirporation compared the employment potential of logging with the potential of ecotourism and found their will be nearly 90 times more jobs created by a strong toursim industry than if the area’s old growth forest was loBed. Instead of logging old-gro+ forests, the Ontario government should concentrate on creating more value-added forest jobs that bring long term economic health to northern Ontario. Between 1990 and 1994, the total volume of forest harvest climbed 22% while the number of people employed b) the forest industry fell by

IMPRINT,

The provincial government has been taking more and more steps to centralize government ( an d power) in thei .r hands. Is this a good idea? In one very, very important way, yes. It can save a lot of money. Right now the province and municipalities jointly administer programs such as roads, public transit, education and some welfare programs (the province covers 100% of -single parent welfare, but municipalities share 20% of general welfare). This leads to enormous duplication. There are 195 municipalities participating in the general welfare program, and 166 school boards in the province. Think of the huge number of unnecessary bureaucrats, sucking up millions of tax dollars every year! However, centralized government has its drawbacks. Most notably, it prevents different jurisdictions from responding to their inctividual problems in a way they think best. For example, some cities have stated that they will not participate in Workfare. If welfare were exclusively the domain of the province, they would not have this option. And with one body setting education policies and standards, there is i deftite danger of intellectual stagnation. One curriculum will lead to an entire province of students being ignorant of exactly the same things. For example, one high school I attended taught “The Merchant of Venice,” and one did not due to its anti-Semitic content. So what’s the solution?. I am an advocate of as much localised government as possible, so I think municipalities should be responsible for their own roads. This way, communities can plan and prioritize as they see fit. Howeveriprovin-

Friday, October 18, 1996

cial government may be required for intermunicipality roads. Unfqrtunately, this probably cannot be avoided. Public transit should be under exclusively municipal control (and funding), preferably by being tendered out to private enterprise. Welfare should be exclusively provincial. Placing it tider municipal control would result in poor municipalities being unable to support its own dependants, which would defeat the entire purpose of weFare by leaving the impoverished in a downward spiral of poverty. And while I am not exactly an ardent supporter of the idea of taxing the haves to give to the havenots, I don’t want to see people starving on the streets. Education should not be under eiher municipal m provincial control. Every school should be allowed to set its own curriculum, and cater to the needs or demands or whatever group it wants (obviously offering people the option of generic public schools or Catholic schools is inadequate). The municipality would still tax people for education (because I do believe the argument that an educated populace benefits all members of society) and would allot hding to each school based on the numbers of students. However, schools should be free to charge extra fees at they see fit (to purchase additional equipment, hire better teachers, etc.) Will these changes solve all the problems? No. But, very importantly, this will make the system more accountable. When service-providers overlap, both sides blame the other for failures, and this has to stop. Voters must be able to clearly identify who to blame for incompetence and success, and when one organization is fully responsible for one service, this can occur.

17%.

A recent opinion poll sponsored by Earthroots indicated that 92% of decided Qntarians and 85% of decided northern Qntarians want to preserve all of Temagami’s old-growth pine. By Kelly Foley, Vice President Education The views in this column don’t necessarily represent you or me. If you agree or Temagami - Just the Facts disagree with the views expressed hcrc then let me know. Speak for yourself! l Between 1960 and 1991 Ontario harvests kefoley@feds.watstar.uwaterloo.ca or ext. 2340 increased 92Oh while employment in the Purpose of this column is to ignite more than enough to pay tuition. This forest industry between 1965 to 1990 has * debate. This is my fourth one and so far no does not take into account the billions of decreased by 40%. dollars currently being spent on student debate. l 48%ofTemagami’srernainingoldgrowth So, I’m going to turn up the heat. aid. I suggest that those builds be used as red and white pine stands are open to loans for living expenses. Today, I propose that we increase tuilogging and mining. tion. That’s right jack it up. Let it skyIn the words of our beloved immortal l Temagami’s huge red and white pine trees are over 100 years old, creating an rocket. Charge students 100% of the cost Larry Smith, Warning warning, danger danger!” There are huge gaping. holes in of operating a university. There are many intricate ecosystem with fragile relationpeople out there that can and are willing to this argument. Make sure you can tell your ships between plants, animals, and their left from right on the political spectrum. environment. It has taken thousands of pay up to $10, 000 for their education. Why should the government subsidize the The first person to spot one of the many years to develop and can never be replaced. flaws in &is logic wfi receive a prize. Tb l Resource extraction such as logging and rich to go to university to become richer? claim your prize, all you have to do is cume Instead the government should redimining will result in habitat loss for rect that funding toward student aid. In down to the Fed Office (SIX 1102) and let populations such as the formerly endan1993, the government spent over 2 billion me know. Alternatively, you can call me by gered bald eagle, and possibly numerous phone at ext. 2340 or email me at dollars on universities in Ontario. Assume other unidentified species. kefoley@feds.watstar~uwaterloo.ca. Bythe for a moment that a familv with an income l Temagami contains 33% ofNorth Amer+ ca’s old growth red and white pine forests. of over $70, 000 could afford tuition of way, if I know your first name you are not eligible. $10,000. According to StatsCan in 1993, l Fallen or dead trees (called snags) provide p.s. This article is dedicated to Sandy Atwal 24.2% of Canada’s popuIation makes over valuable habitat for birds, insects, and maMp-p-s. If you teak this proposal seriously $70, 000. mats ranging from the very small rodents to give your head a shake. In the same year, there were 201,617 the much larger bears. l The Ontario government rejected the w-time undergraduates in Ontario. If p.p.p.s. For those of you who are still reading, you get the benefit of the moral of 24.2% of them came from ftilies with plan previously designed by the Compretoday’s story. What I am suggesting here is incomes over $70,000, then the remaining hensive Planning Council that was initially not too far off the mark of what the govern152,826 students would require student ser up for that purpose. ment would like to see. Admittedly, I have aid. However, if we take the government’s l The logging is taking place in Owain Lake, an area of Temagami, at the rate of 2 billion and divided it among these stu- over-simplified the issue and I didn’t use the word client once. dents they would each receive $13,086.77, 600 trees each day.

Minding (he past

AndrewKxywmiuk linplintstafr t the lowest level of matter, every th.ingisphysics.Ifwedealonlywith A e large scale interactions of certain kinds of particles, we call it chemistry. The macroscopic chemistry ofcarbon-based life-forms is called biology, and the biology of these creatures’ central nervous systems gives rise to psychology. Thus it is evident that the study of intelligence is an interdisciplinary science. But this is not the only scale on which intelligence can be measured. Learning is the development of intelligence in an individual. The progress of an entire race or culture is an aspect of history or anthropology, and when we discuss the rise of intelligence on a cosmic scale we use the theory of evolution. It is interesting that the methods employed in each of these fields are completely different. Different approaches have different goals and require different perspectives, The mechanisms which govern thought are both complex and chaotic, and it would be impossible to fully describe the history of mankind in terms of subatomic physics. Rather than dealing with a theoretical, abstract concept of intelligence, this article G.U explore some of the factors that give rise to practical intelligence, drawing examples from the animal kingdom. The advantage of studying animals is that we can view intelligence on the evolutionary time scale. Instead of trying to correlate human psychology with the chemistry of the brain, we can perhaps gain more insight into our thought processes by examining the different stages of intelligent life+ It is an interesting question, “why do we think?” On one hand, it is likely that intelligence arose as an evolutionary trend which was correlated with the ability to predict cause-effect relationships; in another sense, intelligence is much more than that. Ifthe purpose ofevolution is to propagate our genes then why do some people choose to put their careers ahead of their families?Whydoweenjoyplayingsportsor listening to music when these actions give us no tangible reproductive advantage? As Kurt Vonnegut pointed out in his book Gdupqgus,evolution has taken a step backwards when it produces a being with the free will to seriously consider committing suicide (Vonnegut is also making a broader statement about scientic progress, nuclearweapons, andmutualculturalgenotide). From an evolutionary point of view, conscious thought is just an unfortunate byproduct of intelligence. It seems like we are far away from undersmding how toduplicate human-like intelligence, but from an evolutionary perspective we are remarkably close, Consider that~ehon~,althoughitdisplays~me complex behaviour, is essentially an automaton. To ensure the smooth running of the hive, it is important that ach individual bee of a given type reacts in a similar way to the same situation, Douglas Hofstadter once pondered the question of whether an anthill can have its own personality. Each

individual ant is rather stupid, but the collective actions of a group of ants are nonrandom, and can even seem coherent. ‘I It is possible, to a remarkable extent, to correlate complex actions in lower animals with their genetic structure. It is perhaps dificult to believe that such detailed instructions can be encoded in DNA, but instinct is essentially the hard-coded (ROM) instructions in our brains. We don’t have to learn what emotions are; they are natural reactions to different types of stimuli.t Obviously, learning is an essential part of adaptive intelligence, but how does it manifest itselfin animals? We know that mice can be trained to run mazes, but to what extent can we assign consciousness to them? Do mice have a built-in concept of the distinction between right and left3 An obscure study shows that mice learn to run mazes largely by the variations in the sound of the floor beneath their feet. On a more advanced scale, Pavlov’s dogs exhibit a clear ability to imagine and to link correlated events. Many theoreticians dream of extracting the essense of intelligence from our brains and creating a machine that is able to learn and to think coherently. It is clear to me, however, that our intelligence is developed not only from a stimulus-response feedback loop, but also from hard-wired instinct. We are already familiar with the algorithms that govern neural networks such as the ones within our brain, but we do not yet understand the low-level psychology oftheinsdnCNa@xtions ofour brains weu enough to decode the hardware that helps us think effectively. Like most positive feedback systems, learning is chaotic andhas a strong dependence on initial conditions. This explains why our childhood has such a profound effect on the rest of our life: our past is very deeply rooted in our brains. Thus, it takes a lot of effort to Unlearn a long-held belief, even when faced with compelling evidence

The topography

of intelligence

fears and psvchological disorders such as stuttering. Yhere is an interesting parallel between jerk and mental disorders such as Tourette syndrome: this disorder has been linked to improper regulation of the brain chemical dopamine, which helps control damping of motor actions. The effect of poor damping in electrical control systems is to make the output jerky and oscillatory, rather than smooth and asymptotic. Jerk is symptomatic of an entity that is not welladapted to its surroundings. Perhaps our current artificial intelligence programs are merely lacking the fine tuning that we have wd through e+olution. With many animals it is difficult to tell the difference between true adaptive intelligence and hard-coded instinct. The elabo-

From an evolutionary point of v&?w, conscious thought is just an tinfortunate byproduct of intelligence. to the contrary. This may also offer insight into the reas&s whv vwe have had so much trouble duplicating Our thought processes Artificial intelligence programs exhibit a phenomenon called jerk, whereby they operate correctly for a period of time then suddenly breakdown. No matter how many situations we account for, some new problem always seems to develop after a-time. Tryins to account for each potential situation individually is a pointless endeavour, but making better approximations to our own observed mental states seems doomed because of the aforementioned effects of chaos theory. Ontheotherhand,ourbrai.nisfarfrom perfect. Humans are prone to irrational l

rate social systems of bees and ants prove to be collective effects of rather stupid individuals (perhaps not unlike the collective understanding of a group of rather stupid neurons), but monkeys have the ability to learn sign language and, significantly, the desire to teach it to their offspring. Aneven more remarkable caseis that of dolphins. In one situation, a male and a female dolphin were isolated from each other

by a heavy

transpment

slidiq

door,

but they had an amazing habit of ending up in the same side of the tank each morning. When the Scientists pretended to leave the room one night, they observed the dolphins cooperating by each pushing up one side of the barrier so that they could mate. VVhen

the researchers burst out of hiding the male returned rather sheepishly to his side of the tank and the two doiphins again cooperated to lower the door back into place. I am reminded of the story of my family’s cat, Zimba. One day when Zimba was kicking the snow off her feet she accidentally thumped her paw repeatedly against the door. To her surprise, my mother rushed to the door to let her in, and Zimba knocked on doors for the rest of her life. This is an obvious example of an&al learning, but it is not as signScant as you might think. Cats are not typically well-versed in logical reasoning. While they are able to duplicate a series of events that produce a desiredeffect, theylackthereasoningpower to determine which steps are important and which are merely coincidental, It is possible, though unlikely, that the dolphins learned how to open the door by fluke, but the fact that they closed the door when they were caught bears the unmistakable mark of conscious intelligence. It is probable that the dolphins came to understandtheoperationofthedoorbywatching human operators, so they display a wide veriety of intelligent traits: imitation, communication, cooperation (Ok, it is admittedly questionable whether this qualifies as a human trait), and the concept of right and WOng.

What is even more striking is that dolphins have a sense ofhumour, although it is often exercised at the expense of other animals. Dolphins have been observed rolling turtles over on their backs and plucking the tail feathers off unsuspecting pelicans activities that might appeal to teenage boys. Another interesting prankwas that ofdmpping a morsel of squid outside a school of groupers’ hideout but snatching it away whenever a fish would come out. One of the biggest problems in design@continued

to page

s4 l

SCIENCE

continued

from

page

ing the instincts of an artificially intelligent machine is that our unconscious thoughts operate on a different level than our conscious ones. The ‘voice inside our head’ speaks to us in English, yet beneath that layer is another level of though that is diEcult to express in words. S, Sternburg performed an experiment in which a subject is given a short list of items to memorize. He then tested their recall potential by showing them flash cards and asking them ifthe item is in the set, He discovered that the average response time is a linear function of the size of the set. In other words, ad.chng two items to the set size adds twice as . much time delay s adding one item. This suggests that the brain is pefiorming a sequential comparison of the image against each of the memorized items. The subject was then shown distorted (i.e. blurry) pictures of the items, Ifour brain stored the memorized items as images then we would expect it to take longer to perform each comparison (i.e. the slope of the recognition.tirne plot would increase). But what actually mcured was that the slope remained constant but the y-intercept of the line increased. It takes the same amount of time to check each individual item, but there is an extra one-time delay required to recognize the blurry image. This proves that the brain converts what it seesinto some sort of internal format before it performs - the comparison. Noam Chomsky chastised B.F. Skinner’s teaching methods in this respect. Skinner claimed that, like anything else, sentence construction is merely learned verbal behaviour. He is responsible for the current me&As of teaching grammar in schools - sen-

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tences being dissected into subjects and predicates, nouns and verbs. But Chomsky showed that we formulate our ideas in a different way: there is an internal symbol space within our brain which contains an unordered array of symbols known as tokens. Together, these tokens form a complete thought. Our verbal expression of this thought is not the same as its internal representation. The number of tokens that are active within our brain at any given time is thought to be small (about 7), but tokens that are correlated tend to become amalgam?ted into larger “meta-tokens,” which then become full citizens of the symbol domain. This hierarchical organization of our knowledge proves useful as a model for improving the effectivenessofourteachingtechniques. By chunking symbols into logical groups we can understand microscopic knowledge as macroscopic ideas. Try staring at the wall for awhiiewithout &inking, and you’ll discover why the best way to clear your mind is to chant a mantra, While our mind can process many different pieces of information at a time, we are only capable of consciously focuskg on one object at a time. The border benveen an object and its environment is fuzzy, but it follows the general rule that the bigger the object, the less detail we observe. The rest of thedetailisfilledinbyourpreconceptions ofwhat we expect to see. It is this ‘flati in our visual system that allows our imagination to extrapolate for us. For example, close your eyes and imagine your father, What colour pants is he wearing? (he is wearing pants, right?) The point is that you didn’t have to make a conscious choice because your sub’ conscious is perfectly capable of

Hey...

Friday, October 18, 1996

IMPRINT,

Did you hear the one about the artsy, the eqgineer, and the ttma fisherman?

making arbitrary decisions on its own. In fact, your mind is unable to fundamentally distinguish between actual sensory input and imagined stimuli, which is why nightmares can be so scary. This was the subjectofa movie calledU~f~~et in which a cop tracks down a killer by injecting himself with the victims’ brain fluid. Is this idea as far fetched as it sounds? No, actually. Within the brain, memories are not localized. If we were given accessto a small part of a person’s brain we should be able to view their memories but they would be grainy and

disjointed. In the movie, the main character increases the dosage and returns to the scene of the crime in order to increase the fidelity of the images, but he also becomes unable to distinguish his own memories from the injected ones. It is often easier to study a complex processby first analysing simplied models and adding new wrinkles at each stage. Charring the progress of the evolution of intelligence gives us different insights into the learning process than child psychology can because the controlled variable is the intellectual developement of the speties rather than the mental sophistication of the subject, It ofien takes children three to five years just to learn how to read, but consider just how many prerequisites they have to overcome.

The child has to learn to distiguish readable materials (i.e. books or other documents) from unreadable materials (i.e. cats and tricycles), written text from random scribbles and then one word from another. Almost any child can read the word McDonalds (although many of them pronounce it “hamburger”) but it takes some time nonetheless. If we were to examine the progression of intelligence from automaton to social animals who understand humour, we see that complex behaviour develops at an exponential rate. There are still many things we do not understand about the way we think, but evolution of animals gives us a cIue as to how sentience can arise out of the vaccuum formerly known as chaos.

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We jones to see TamesBond do the unbelievable, but should he just retire? d

by Tim Bondarenko Imprint staff n his eighteen films, James Bond has done a lot for Britain and for the rest of the planet. He’s driven expensive cars, played with revoluti&ry weapons and equipment, travelled extensively around the world, slept with beautim women, killed bad guys, performed amazing stunts, eaten exotic food, and of course, saved us all from the evil doings of various individuals or organizations. He no doubt deserves to be knighted for his efflorts. But I think it’s time for James Bond to retire. And we, as his admirers, should allow him to move to Nice and bake in the sun for the rest of his days, collecting his pension from the British government. Since his crcatio; in 1952 bv the British novelist Ian Fleming: the charactct- of James 13ond has appeal-cd in 18 major matron pictures, played , bv, five difYerent Xrcxs & The first to play the super-spy ws the honourable Sean Cannery in the film Dr. Nu, in 1962. Conner-y then went on to play the character in six more films, some ofwhich are indeed the best Bond f&m ever. Connery’s cool and aggressive style of playing the spy

in Fmm Russia with Ihe, GoLdfinder, Tbztnderball, 2%~ Only Live Twice, Diamonds Are Fmvw, and NvmSay AkmAgaiq earned

him the reputation of being the best Bond on the big screen, Anyone who rebuts this claim obviously hasn’t seen their fair share of the Bond films. Connery is undisputably the best Bond. Between the films You Only Live Twice, and Diamonds Are Fumver, Gunnery was replaced by actor George Lazenby in the film On Htr Majesty’s Secret Sew&, in 1969. The film attracted thousands of fans and brought in over nine million dollars of revenue, despite the change ofprotagonist. It was evident that by 1969, James Bond had a following of loyal fans, who didn’t care what their hero looked like, as long as he could still pack a punch, fire his Walther PPK with deadly accuracy, and woo women with his suave lines. In this film, Bond gets married to the woman that he actually loves. But, ofcourse, tragedy strikes at the end of the flick to set up the next film, Diamonds

Fumm-, with the return of Cmnery to the role of Bond. The next appearance of Cannery as Bond would take place twelve years later, in the film N#W Say Never Agab, which nonetheless was his last film as the British agent. In the meantime, a new Bond hit the screen, the third actor to play the super-spy. His name was Roger Moore. Moore, unlike Cannery, was a sofi Bond, and spoke almost romantically. But true Bond fans can’t criticize his performance too harshly. He did his job: saved the world, slept with women, killed bad guys, travelled, and drove expensive cars. Moore, like Cannery, played Bond in seven films, the first being Live and Let Die, in 1973. Moore would play the role of Bond for twelve years in TkwMan Are

wi’tb The Golden Gun, The S’ W?h Loved ME, &hwaraker, For YourEyes On(y, O~topxssy, and his last in 1985,Vim TuAI~lZ. Aging

and feeling drained from playing Bond for over a decade, Moore resigned and the hunt was on for a new Bond. The new Bond would appear in the f&n,

The Living

Daylights,

which was the fititecnth Bond film, in 1987. Timothy Dalton was the man who replaced Roger Moore, and it seemed like Bond fans were given a young and extremely aggressive performance from Dalton. Those who were disappointed with Moore’s performance, felt the same for Dalton’s, it seemed like both actors were on different ends ofthe Bond spectrum; Moore as a sofi and romantic, and Dalton as hard and lacking compassion. Dalton would star in one other Bond film, Licence To Kill, in 1989, tier which the character of James Bond would lie dormant on the shelves of video rental stores, and new and used book stores. Many fans wondered if Bond would return to the screen to fulfii his duties again; some ofus hoped he did, while others wished he didn’t. Having personally seen ail of the seventeen Bond films, some many times over, I have to say I was hoping Bond would just retire and move to Nice. But when Bond hysteria hit the streets last year in November, I too was excited to see Bond take

Cannery:

Indisputedly

the best Bond there was.

action again, even though I had wished for the opposite during the six-year lull. I went and saw Goldencye, staring Pierce Brosnan, the fifih actor to play Bond, and it was the worst Bond film in history for two reasons. First, those ofyou who have seen the film, will understand that the stunt with the plane at the beginning was, to say the very least, impossible, even for Bond. Second, James Bond does not use a machine gun, and he does not kill hundreds of people, like he did in this film. To make sure it was the worst, I went and saw it again, this time with my father, a veteran Bond fan and critic. The second time through didn’t change my mind, nor did the film impress my father. I left the theatre eight dollars poorer, and feeling depressed about the entire Bond SiNation. Days later, I had to watch GoldJinger and Thunderball, just to remind myself of the good old days. But as a true Bond fan, you have to watch it, just to know

what a bad Bond film looks like. And believe me, it is a bad Bond film. After seeing Golldentye, my faith in Bond films deteriorated, and I’m hoping it was the last. Like I said before, Bond needs a retirement. But if they do decide to make another Bond film, I hope they do it with original taste, and original formality. Fleming’s books about the spy were suspensehl, not action packed like cheesy action novels. The writers for the new Bond film must remember that James Bond did things with elegance and style, not with military discipline, like he does in

wortd. The Bond flicks can be rented at almost every movie store, and for those of you who like to read about the spy, the Fleming novels are quite easy to find. Used copies of the novels can be found at book stores in K-W for the low cost of one or two dollars, while the videos can be purchased. , brand new, for under f&een. Whether or not you’re a die hard Bond fan, or just a one movie lover of the spy, I just have one question for you: don’t you think the guy needs a break from saving the world? I think we, as a society of Bond fanatics, should warmly accept his resignation, and let him die in peace, at a viila in Nice.

Goldeneye.

The conversions from book to movie no doubt have to be embellished a little to entertain us, but the embellishments must not be extreme. Fleming, 1 think, would have been disappointed with the portrayal of his character in Goldenye. Finally, I would like to say that James Bond will live on forever in the homes of people all over the

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This Weekendin

Var$ity

Yes, this is the Ultimate

sports

Saturday, October 19

Koaru Kumabe, of The Team Currently Known as Zen Tofu, lays out to grab the d&c while Jeff “StrGY Spitzig (extreme left) looks on in the distance. The team will be representing the University of Waterloo in this weekend’s Canadian University ultimate Championships at Bechtel Park in Waterloo. photo

by Jeff Peeters Imprint staff . weekend, Waterloo will play host to the second T” annual Canadian University Ultimate Championships (CUUCZ) at Bechtel and Lexington Parks. The tournament will feahxe 22 teams, nine female and 13 open, from across the country competing for the honour of being the top university Ultimate team in Canada. Teams are coming from as far east as DaIhousie and as far west as the University of Victoria. The tournament starts today and lasts all weekend. The tournament is in round-robin pool-play style with playoffs starting on Saturday afternoon. The finals go sometime on Sunday afternoon.

Ultimate is a game that requires speed, skill, and endurance. Two teams of seven players each play on a 120x40-foot field. The projectile of choice is a flying disc (please don’t call it a frisbee), which the teams attempt to advance downfield by completing

passes to their teammates, since fairplay on theplayer. H&My cmrunning with the disc is not al- petitiveplay iseHCuura~ed, hit ?wvl?r lowed. You retain possession un- at theexpense of thebond ofmutwd til you fail to complete a pass or rapat between playem, adherence to you score a goal by catching the = the u.reed upon mles of the~ume, m disc in your opponent’s end zone. the basic joy of play. Protectian of After every goal, teams switch these vital elements serves to elimisides so that environmental connate adverse conductjhm the Ultiditions are evened up. mnte field. Stick actims us taun tin8 Ultimate is a fast-paced, ex- of opposing pluym, dangersus It& citing

game.

A major

requirement

gressiun,

in tentiu!@Einfl,

mother

for playing Ultimate is total lack ‘win-at-all-costs’ bebakr are conof regard-for your own body. wav to the spirit of thedame and Players dive (more commonly must be mwided &y allpluym? Waterloo’s entry into this called a layout) all over the place trying to get possession of the year’s tournament is The Team precious disc. However, while Currently Known as Zen Tofu, games are very intense, no contact The team has had some impressive showings as of late, getting to is allowed between participants. Ultimate only has one real the consolation final ofrhe McGill rule that is applicable to all situaUltimate Tournament two weeks tions. It is called the Spirit of the ago. While they probably won’t Game clause, and its purpose is to figure into the chase for the harduphold the integrity of the game ware this weekend, team member Jeff Spitzig saysthat everyone just of Ultimate. As such, there are no referees, and players are to make comes to have fun and that “there all calls themselves. The Spirit of are no losers.” The name Zen To~LI has an the Game clause states: TJitimute has tmdit~ally v-e- interesting background. A team member was busy one day trying lied zlrpon a spirit of spmtsmanship which places the respom&&y fm to think of names for the team. At

by Paul Kry

the time he had Zen and Tofu running through his mind. He put the two together and also came up with the team’s slogan, “Chop wood, carry water,” an example of Zen philosophy, which appears on the team’s shirts. The tournament is an oficial Oktoberfest event, and as such, all of the teams will be participating in Oktoberfest activities. The tournament has attracted corporate sponsorship from Nortel, Kinsmen, Corel, and the UW Federation of Students. Core1 has donated prizes that will be given away as “spirit awards,” given the large role played by spirit in the game of Ultimate. The teams to watch in the tournament will be from Carleton, who had last year’s champions, Ottawa, Victoria, and Dalhousie. Zen Tofu’s first game will 0~ today at 10 a.m. If you’ve ever wanted to see what Ultimate is al: about, this weekend is your chance as some of the best players in the country will be here, showing every last one of us what sport is really supposed to be all about.

SPORTS

Lancers foiled by Warriors by Tony Martins special to Imprint t’s said that the mark of a good team is the ability to win even when the breaks I aren’t coming. Well that’s just what the Warrior Football squad did on Saturday in Windsor against a dramatically improved Lancer team. Despite being slowed by uncharacteristic mental errors on both offence and defence, the Warriors scored twice in the second half-both times through the air-to overcome a 6-1 haRime deficit, win the game 15-13, and improve their CXJAAbest record to 5-l. The I996 Warriors could probably sense they were onto something big when they destroyed the Lancers 33- 1 at University Stadium in the season opener on September 7. But the rematch on Saturday was perhaps more teLling, when the Lancer unit from that first game blow-out were nowhere to be found. Instead, the boys from Windsor gave the Warriors aLl they could handle and made the game close with a fourth quarter touchdown. A defensive miscue led to Windsor’s first major in the opening stanza (although the convert attempt was blocked). Then a Rick Shea fumble at the Lancer 5yard-line produced only one point (Windsor recov-

Due to circunx,tances beyond our control, the scoring summary and game statistics are not available this week. Imprint Sports apologizes to all those d&appointed sports fans out there who were looking forward to pouring over the numbers from last Saturday’s victory over Wrindsor.

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The Lancers took advantage of two Warrior penalties in the final five minutes to score on a one-yard run and bring the score to 15-13. But after the teams had traded punts, the Warrior offence ran out the clock. Tomorrow, the Warriors (5- 1) look to stay in first place in the OUAA when they host the Toronto Varsity Blues (3-3) at University Stadium. Game time is 2 p.m.

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Friday, October 18, 1996

‘Fest forgettable for Warriors

ered the ball in their end zone) instead of the six that seemed imminent. In the third quarter Waterloo began controlling the bail with its powerful running game. Having established the run, quarterback Ryan Wilkinson went to the air for the points and hooked up with wide receiver Chris Amey for the first of two touchdown passes between them. Amey ftished with four catches for 99 yards and was named the Warrior Athlete of the

STUDENT SPECIAL!

are who

IMPRINT,

pve*

staff

ktoberfest is supposed to be a time of insane revelry. You know, draft and polka inside a dark, sweaty hockev arena. Its also a time for the Oktoberfest hockey tournament and a chance for the locals, Laurier and Waterloo, to strut their stuff in the final pre-season tilt. For the defending Ontario champion Warriors, the Oktoberfest spirit was delinitelg half-present. There was insanity but alas, not much revelry. After munching York 10-2 Friday night, the Warriors dropped their Saturday semi-final date to Guelph in a 5-4 overtime af&r. Making matters much worse, the Black and Gold encountered Laurier in the Sunday afternoon consolation final. And lost. 613, Golden Hawks. Perhaps it’s not panic-button-pressing time. The regular season hasn’t started yet, Plavers haven’t hit their form or built up their stamina. It was an off-game. Th> Warriors were down after being eliminated byi Guelph. It’s just that WLI hate to lose to Lmricr. Ever. Especi& Gth the Golden Hawk line-up, which &prisingl\~ * enough, looks worst on papa- than last vex’s four-win, last-in-Canada outfit. In the loss, the Hawks jumped OLIN to a 5-l lead after two perir>ds, the Warriors popped in him in the third and surrendered an q3h’-Wt ttSr.

Chad Palmer, Chris Kraemer, and Steve Smith

scored

for the Warriors.

h’ewcoming

netminders Scott Walls and Andy Adams split the shotblocking duties. On Saturday against Guelph, the Warriors boarded a scary-looking rollercoaster and didn’t survive the ride. Jumping out to

a 3-2 lead, Waterloo ran out of gas and fell behind 4-3, miraculously tied the score with forty ticks remaining, then perished with three minutes left in overtime. Warrior goals came from Jeff Coldie (with a pair), K raemer, and Mike Chambers. Joe Harris shone for the Black and Gold in front of the cage, but Gryph goalie Matt Mullin stole the show. Warrior power forward Peter Brearlcy will be seeing Mullin in his nightmares for a while, having been foiled by the masked thief on a bushel full of opportunities. Guelph continued on to lose the Sunday tournatnent final against Laurentian, 5-3. In the Waterloo lambasting of York, Jeff Goldie added another double marker to his collection, and single biscuits belonged to Kraemer, Greg Esdale, Greg Fullerton, Hrearley, rookie Joel Widmeyer, Mark Cardiff, Dave Pfohl, and Aaron Kenney. The

Black

and Gold’s

season

starts

with a bang tonight at Columbia Ice Fields against the Ryrrson Goats. Game time is 7:30 p.m. WARRIOR NOTES: Second year Peter Brearley accumulated one goal and seven assists during

the three games..

. Jctf Coldic

ied the Potter Squad with four lampblushers.. . Forward h/iatt St. Gerrnain will miss the Fall schedule and return to the lineup ,tfter Christmas...Thc Warriors haven’t lost a lot of players, but thev h~c lost quality. Graduating seniors in&&d John W&x, the bust player in Canada last year, Sheldon Gilchrist; a reliable goal scorer, and Brian Henry, the ultimate

crasher n’ banger...The Captain of this year’s squad is the speedy, hardworking Steve Smith, a master&l choice by Don McKee.. . Chris Kraemer and Mark Cardiff are again acting as Alternates.

IMPRINT,

Friday,

October

18, 1996

SPORTS

’

Stroke, Stroke PHOTOGRAPHERS

by Sonya IIadman

for GaaUates whoappreciate the /i@aezrt in portraitis

special to Imprint

he varsity rowing season is well underway with our UW Crew attending the Brock Invitational this past Saturday. What looked like promising weather in St. Catharines turned windy late in the morning, makingthewaterontheHenleycourse unpredictable. Unaccustomed to the choppy conditions, the crews had to row sound technical races and take full advantage of the strong tailwind provided on the second half of the course. The crew’s top performance was surrendered in the men’s heavyweight single sculls, where veteran rower Dave Goode rebounded from a disappointing race earlier in the day to capture first place in the division. On the women’s side, heavyweight single sculler Lesley Honsberger put in an excellent showing, taking third place in her category. Rookie Olga Uchitel also put in a strong performance in the lightweight single sculls, having to adjust her balance quickly to accommodate the waves. The women’s double sculls raced well, pairing veterans Heather Holden and Janine Oosterveld with rookie Uchitel andHonsberger in the lightweight and heavyweight divisions respectively. Our men’s double of Ajay Seth and Jason Berkers rowed well considering the sudden

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change in partners, with Berkers filling in forinjured veteran Steve Higgins, who should be back in action by Saturday. Berkers was called to action again in the men’s coxed-four, where the two-seat helped rookies B. J. Schellenberg, Nathan Ma&, stroke Chris De&en, and coxswain Melissa Kovacs to a respectable finish. The rookie heavyweight crew women’s of Tania Kingsberry, Lori Ziolkowski, Lynn Snedden, stroke JessieMaier and coxswain Trish Green, overcame several setbacks this season to race well. Having to adjust positions to accommodate Snedden’s wrist injury and losing former crew member Heather Good to illness forced them to race with only a week’s practice

by Jason Rerkers

behind them. The rookie lightweight women’s four powered through their race to close the open water between them and the Queen’s crew after a poor start. Racing against a deep field of experienced rowers, rookies Sonya Hardman, Lorie Sermetkovski, Carrie Napper, stroke Dana Borschewski and coxswain Sarah “little one” Graham, continue to improve under the strong guidance of coaches Ralph Shiell, Dean Taylor, and head coach Colin MacDougall. They promise to be a force to be reckoned with next season, with four seatslooking to return next year. The varsity rowers will regroup this week at the Western Invitational, as they look towards the OU/OW finals in three weeks.

Baseballers close out season

here are very few situations when a 5-11 season would be deemed a success. This happens to be one of them. The expansionist Waterloo baseball club completed their inaugural season last Tuesday with a doubleheader against McMaster, losing the top half by a 3-2 squeaker, but taking the nightcap with a 12-2 debacle. In game one, luckless lefthander Matt Lindsay made hirnselfat home on the hill, pitching a Pat Hentgenish, but fruitless, two hitter. Mac pushed across their tit run after a disputed call at first, their second on a suicide squeeze, and the winning run in the bottom of the seventh on a pop fly that provolie”a a communication breakdown between the Waterloo shortstop and centrefielder. Although Waterloo themselves managed a mere four hits in the pitching duel, Warrior designated hitter Dan Hope went twofor-two with an RJ31 single. In game two, catcher Aaron Chu bombed a 400-foot two run missile to centre field that, in ef-

fect, brokeMac’s back in the blowout. The booming Warrior bats messed up Mac’s pitching arms to the tune of a dozen runs. Southpaw Troy Brady picked up the win to complete the Waterloo season who, due to expansion, are unable to participate in the postseason. Looking back on the season, the Black and Gold’s record does not indicate their performance. Saddled by a weak bullpen and no efKectivestopper, the Warrior5 lost five of their sixteen contests on opposing last inning outbursts. The overall team Earned Run Average mirrored a Tiger-like 6.00, and frustrating walks appeared at inopportune times throughout the season. In one game this season, up 8-7, the Warriors pitching stti walked eleven men in one inning to throw the game away. However, not everything was gloom and doom. In fact, Waterloo achieved their first year timetable, and then some. Losing late in the game builds a lot of character. Good ftiendships were developed on a team that gelled early, and the bats were solid, smoking the ball at an excellent .296 pace. Most importantly to Warrior coach J.P, Soucie, the club is where

they should be mentally. And a& though they do need a few parts tinkered with (read: 1a bullpen), the basic pieces of the puzzle are already in place. ‘We have a strong nucleus coming back next season,” observes Soucie. “Making the playoffs is fait d’accomplie . We’re better than Guelph and Laurier already, and shooting for first place is very attainable.” Soucie is a man with a lofty outlook. LLIhave a four year plan to the national championship,” confides the philosophizing skipper. Y’m a man of big dreams. Every goal starts with a dream. Every journey starts with a step. This year was the first step.” Next week, the baseball staff meets with the Athletic Department to see where they stand in the scheme of things. Foremost on the minds of the braintrust is to achieve Varsity status in order to compete in the play-offs next year. Soucic

also wants

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schedule to read on opening day: Laurier at Waterloo. Armed with a high level of enthusiasm and an impressive product in the community, negotiations should prove as smooth as the Warriors’ on-field future.

Wed. IO-5 o-m.

SPORTS

Ciiristmas?

Athenas down 5 points for final playoff berth+,,with 3 games to go

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t takes more than practised skill to come from behind and win games - it takes heart. The Athenas proved to have that in abundence in last week’s 2-1 must-win victory over the Windsor Lancers. Following back-to-back lossesagainst Western and Guelph the weekend before, the hope of securing a playoff berth for the first time in four years seemed slim. The luxury of a top-four ranking in the conference was lost entirely and the Athenas were forced to once again come from behind. The cool and rainy weather at Columbia Lake was welcomed bl the hometown squad. Thk Athenas won the coin toss and solicited the side that offered the wind advantage. From the opening whistle, the Waterloo of&nsive side attacked with a purpose. They say that the best defence is a good offence; unfortunately for the Athenas, the strong offensive game slowly transformed to an organized defensive game. On a quick turnaround from the Waterloo defensive, a crossed ball from a Windsor player on the left wing found an open midfielder on the right who shot the ball low into the bottom right corner. The shot beat netrninder Nicole Wight, whose inaction in the game until that point kept her insufhcientiy warm. With the vision of an extended season fading from sight, the darlings of the OW West conference fought valiantly for the remainder of the first half, but to no avail - the score at the half was steadfast at 1-O for the visiting

lhn’t you wish you were a soccer ball? photo

Lancers, A coach must certainlv experience the spectrum of e&o&s of his play&s, plus one more, unique to him, as he watches his talented team losing a sure thing. Coach Brue Rodrigues expressed his utter helplessness to his squad at halftime: ‘7 can teach you skills and set plays, but I cannot put the will to win in your hearts.” With that said, the coach left the team to determine its fate, and a curious thing happened - the Athenas were visited by the ghost of underdogs past: Team Spirit. The second halfprovided the setting for the dashing of Windsor’s hopes for a first victory. The fashion in which the Athenas threaded passeswould have made Calvin Klein envious. It was light work to send the ball down the right wing to Heather “Gladiator”Moyse, who found Kim Rau eagerly awaiting the cross on six yards, and from there she ham-

by Paul Rencoret

mered the ball into the back of the net to make the score l-l. Deja-vu was going to haunt the Lancers as Team Spirit persisted in the hometowner’s hearts. An inspired game was played by Sandi Dargel, taking on three or more defenders per offensive challenge. Her enhanced efforts were rewarded as she commanded a Melissa Man&i corner kick and headed the ball past the Windsor keeper to put Waterloo ‘a-head, 2-1 a This second half, two-goal comeback over the Lancers was a repeat performance ofthe Athenas’ first matchup with Windsor, which culminated in their first victory in two seasons. The Athenas play away at Brock on Saturday, October 19th and home to Western at 1 p.m on Sunday October 20. Spectator support for Sunday’s game would be greatly appreciated, as Water100 persists in its drive for the playoffs.

Varsity Rdundup by Tony Martins Athletics and Recreational Services

The Waterloo badminton team got perfect performances from Lindy Loh in Singles and Emily Strong in both singles and doubles, and finished a close second to Western at the West Sectional tournament played at the Columbia Recreational Complex on the weekend. UW actually finished tied with Western at 35 points each, but the Mustangs were awarded top spot based on superior head-to-head results with Waterloo. Strong, a first year student,combinedwitI%a.renClarke

to post a perfect #2 doubles record in the event. She was also undefeated as the #2 singles player for Waterlm. Loh, last year’s Athena Rookie of the Year, played Waterloo’s #l singles and did not drop a game. In mixed doubles, UW’s Patrick Chuong and Cam Ngo won three of four matches. Wawbr

Gulf-

’ Waterloo finished 8th in a X2-team field at the OUAA Golf Championships played October 7 and 8 at St. Andrew’s GolfClub in Aurora, Waterloo’s final team score was 665. Ottawa won the event shooting a combined 622 (five golfers over two rounds), while Laurier was second with

622 aswell (tie broken using score of fti place goKer on each team) and York third with 314. No Warrior golfers finished in the individual top ten at the event. Warrior

Rqgby

The hard-luck Rugby Warriors were spared the frustration of losing another game in the closing minutes, but this time fell 55 9 to Queen’s on Thursday at Columbia Fields. Vam’ty Soccer The Warrior Soccer squad enjoyed its biggest o6ensive showbgofthe yeafin last Wednesday3 4-O win over the visiting Windsor Lancers,

IMPRINT,

SPORTS

Friday, October 18, 1996

These rooks aren’t pawns by Mike Downing special to Imprint

Back rowz Mark Rigeau, Fat German, Jon Awod, Josh Holdea Front pow: Dan Schipper, Jeff Fox. When Coach Kieswetter issues these kids some uniforms, they could really do some damage in the OUAA West, photo

Happy btiday

by Gillian

Downes

due to anxiety of not knowing what to expect. What does it take to overcome the struggles of youth? Coach Kieswetter thinks we must learn from the mistakes and expect to make mistakes. The lessons of control, integrity, hard work, and intelligence being most necessary. These happen to be the very qualities Mano Watsa and Mark Eys, the team captains, possess. It is their leadership that the younger eyes will be looking for to defeat the anxiety. Add to this year’s rookies five of last year’s first year players and returnee Eric Steinman who return with greater skill, faster, stronger, and- more confident, reddy for battle, and what a battle it is. A conflict &here no excuses are tolerated. The favoured must meet the underdog, the young must meet the old. The battle is just as much of the mind as of the wy, ofsweat, effort, frustrations; a war, no less. Thank God we’re WARRIORS.

to you...

UW Bike Centre

celebrates first anniversary by Andrea Russell special t.0 Imprint

bout a week ago I passed a kid shooting baskets in Ah is driveway. He was young and the ball was too heavy for him, but he kept heaving it up until with much effort he got one in then he smiled, as only kids can, and started shooting again. Two hours later, another kid blows by me and shoots smiling. Except he does so from 22 feet and is wearing a Waterloo hoops practice jersey. Varsity basketball had begunMarc Rigeau doesn’t struggle to get the ball through the net. Matter of fact, he does it with such ease and so frequently that he’s been donned with the nickname “Shotgun”. A tall, skinny kid from Lendon keeps beating his man down the court and aggressively pounding away dunks tofmish breakaways. Yet Dan Schipper is so quiet, so unobtrusive off the court that

it’s hard to realize that they’re the same person. Josh Holden, a prized local recruit, is ofi the sidelines injured and caught between the need to rest and heal, and the pair&l desire to play, to join his fellow rookies and represent. No one supplies more intensity than Jon Awad, few people work harder. He’s like Dennis Kodman with a jerricurl. But for Pat Gorman and Jeff Fox this vears team is a return and a con&nuation. Pat returns to varsity sports afier a break from fmtball. Jeff has made the team after several years of trying. Both are the oldest members of the team despite being rookies and bring accomplished pickup skills to the squad. Western, Guelph, and McMaster return nationally ranked teams that are again loaded, making this year a very challenging one for the young team. Young teams usually struggle not only because of competition but

few years back, a couple of crazy triathletes put eir heads together and came up with an idea. An idea to begin a non-profit, student-run place where the UW community could come to frx their bikes, talk about cycling, and meet new people interested in doing what they enjoy. Exactly one year ago this Friday, October 18, this idea was made into Canada’s first student operated, do-it-yourself’ bike repair centre. Today, we are still the only on-campus student-run bike repair centre in Canada. Thanks to the UW Endowment Fund and the Student Life Centre Management Board, those two crazy triathletes, Mike Zuliani and Wayne Ho, were able to put their idea into action. Although Mike and Wayne have graduated, there remains a group of students who are committed to providing an important service to the students, stti and faculty of UW. Our goal, as it always has been, is to encourage UW students, faculty, and staffto use bicycles as an alternative, b way to travel. We’re here to make

it easier for you to maintain your bike in safe, working condition. Anytime we’re open you can come in and fix, maintain or even just play with your bike. We offer almost any tool you could need, ample space, and a St&of friendly, knowledgeable volunteers who can either guide you in your rnission or show you to our resources, such as the best bike repair manuals around. Our fee for using the centre and our tools is a meagre one dollar an hour and ti additional flat rate of one dollar for any degreaser, lube or WD-40 you may need. We even have an air compressor inside the shop, (complete with a pressure gage) to keep )‘our tires pumped up for the road or the bush, whatever your fancy! Also, we now have tubes, patch kits and cables available for sale. We are located in the basement of the Student Life Centre, room IOlA, just past CIBC and Dr. Disc at the very end of the hall. From the outside, look for the door on the northwest corner of the SK, next to the red Air Servepumpandtheloadingdocks. Our hours are: Monday - Thursday, 11:30a.m. - 7 p.m. and Friday, ll:3Oa.m. - 530p.m.

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SPORTS

IMPRINT,

Friday, October 18, 1996

Nuts ‘n Bolts I know this isn’t going to make me any &ends, but it needs to be said: Roberto Alomar is getting a raw deal. As most people know, Afomar has been at the centre of baseball’s biggest hurricane since hespitatumpire JohnHirschbeck during a game in Toronto last month. The umpires threatened to walk out of playoff games if Alomar was not given more than the five-game suspension baseball handed him, Since then, fans, sportswriters, and even the mayor ofNew York City have denounced the Orioles second baseman. One New York radio station plans to give Alomar a jar full of spit. Or is that spite? Yankees fans, it seems, just love umpires. Let’s leave aside the fact that Hirschbeck, who threatened to kill Alomar at one point, is not wholly innocent in all this. Let’s alsoleaveasidethcfactthatAlomar issued a public apology to Hirschbeck. What remains is that, in the heat ofthe moment, Alomar did a rash, foolish thing. For that he has received a suspension

which, as is his right, he may serve at the beginning of next season. Fans argue, however, that the punishment should be stiffer, or at least should have to be served right away. But ifprecedent is to be our guide, five regular season games is a harsh penalty indeed. Players who throw punches on the field are normally given only three games off. Albert Belle wound up with only two games when he decked an unsuspecting Milwaukee second baseman, But maybe spitting is more terrible than fighting. Maybe flagrant salivation is more heinous than assault. Maybe the punishment was too light. Some have suggested, for example, that Alomar should have been forced to sit out two playoff games now instead offive regular games later, or even five games now. But even ifRobbie’s penalty was too slight, the fault is with the American League. The flood of ink (and other fluids) should be directed towards constructing a more considered, consistent way for disciplining players.

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It’s not public knowledge yet, but I heard Frank Bruno, the polite Englishman who had both gigantic gall and enormous balls to step in the ring with half-man/ ha&beast Iron Mike Tyson, has a problem. Yes, boxing fans, Srank Bruno has brain damage. Brain damage suffered at the hands of the incomprehensible Tyson. Now this information seems to underline two points, as it should for any fan of the &sweet science”. First, I feel compassion for Bruno. There are risks in any sport, but of course, with boxing, being repeatedly punched in the skull by a man who can break down a brick wall with his hands is different. It just doesn’t make a guy very insurable, ya know what I mean. Second, and most importantly, never agak shall we be forced to listen to an ignorant bastard remark after seeing Iron Mike flatten some fella in less time than it takes to make Tang, “Oh, geez, I’d get in the ring with Tyson for

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of-Famers for their production in the short season thus fa. Tampa Bay’s Dine Ciccarelli leads his team with six points (three goals, three assists) and Mike Gartner leads the entire NHL with six biscuits in only five games. The sad thing about Garts is that he should still be on the Buds. Cliffie Fletcher, if you’re proposing to go with a youth movement, then go whole hog. Axe Doug Gilmour, Wendel Clark, Larry Murphy, Dave Ellet, Jamie Macou.n,..the list goes on. The sure measure of a half-as& organization is a team that handles their personnel half-assed. And that’s exactly what the Leafs are doing. They won’t say they’re going with youth, but they’re not bringing in players who can carry the jockstraps of the ones who are leaving. Figure that out. Have you ever seen a sorrier team than the New York Jets? Well, consider this: The Jets brass opened the vault to Neil O’Donnell at the start of the season and celebrated him as their newest free agent star, the man to lead the team back to respectability? Neil O’Donnell? Wasn’t he the weakest link of a strong Steeler outfit last season? Isn’t Neil O’Donnell one of the worst quarterbacks in the NFL. What the hell were the Jets thinking?

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three million bucks. Who wouldn’t?” Yeh, right, Shakespeare. You’d risk becoming a drooling mess for three m.ill?Not I* I feel really warm and fuzzy about two people in the baseball post-season. Both are Yankees. Cecil Fielder and Joe Terre. Terre, because of his situation. His brother died; his other brother’s sick. He’s never been to the World Series despite playins and managing four thousand, two hundredodd games. He deserves it. He’s an unassuming hero. With Big Cecil; I feel an fiity with the man because he was a MoTown Bengal for more than half a decade. Big Daddy.posted such impressive numbers that there is anfy one man you can honestly comparehisstatisticswith: BabeRuth. Yet, going into the World Series, after producing big-time in the American League Championship Series, there is debate whether Fielder or good-fielding first baseman Tino Martinez will play in the National League, DH-less portion of the Fall Classic. I’m just saying that if the Yanks sit Cecil, they will have taken their biggest weapon out of the lineup. The man’s mere presence wins ballgames. Put him in, Joe. Turning to hockey, it’s time to highlight two old, fiture Hali-

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Chris, a wide receiver, was a keyperformerintheWarrio.rs 1513 win over Windsor on Saturday over the much-improved Lancers. The third-year Engineering student from London caught two big touchdown passes in the second halfgiving Waterloo the lead and the victory.

Emily

went undefeated in and doubles competition on the weekend when Waterloo hosted the West Sectional tournament. A first-year student who play&s Waterloo’s #2 singles and #2 doubles, Emily’s fine play helped Waterloo finish a close second to Western at the event. both

singles

IMPRINT,

Friday, October 18, 1996

I’m formulating this little theory about ‘OUTneighbours to the south. The really intelligent Americans are the ones you never hear from - they shun the spotlight and conduct their affairs behind a shroud of mystery. Instead, they search for the stupidest of their kind and turn them into public figures, such as politicians or Hollywood types. Or, if they’re really, really dumb, they turn them into sports announcers. I was tuning into the final-game of ALCS, and somewhat enjoying the Yankees posting an early lead at the expense of Roberto Alomar, when, around the sixth inning or so, the announcing team of Bob Cost&, Bob Wecker and Joe Morgan took it upon themselves to discuss the cy Young race between Yank Andy Pettite, who was pitching at the time, and Biue Jay Pat Hentgen. Now, this is nothing new, every baseball fan has likely already heard a great deai -a-d - -a Id&t. about this. But it Bob Ueckec was the rationale expressed by these “experts” that really, re@y irritated me. On the topic of Andy’s 3.87 ERA (which could be the highest ever for a Cy Young winner), the Bobs, Costas and Wecker, informed the viewing public that, if you ignore the two really bad starts Pettite made, giving up ten earned runs on ten hits in two and two-thirds innings to Oakland, and eight earned runs on nine hits in one inning against Baltimore, then his ERA drops to something around 3.19, and he knocks a couple of losses off his 2 l8 record. Wow, this is remarkable tiormation, and a brilliant new way to calculate statistics. Au you have to do is take into account what you think is important and . completely ignore the rest. This system is so incredible in fact, that it deserves its own name. I’m going to dub this new trend the Modified Bobs System, or the MBS. So, using the MBS, let us take a whim-

SPORTS *

sical look at the season that was. First off, everyone can get off of John Olerud’s back. I mean, come on, the guy batted 1.000 this season (check it out for yourself, 108 hits in 108 at-bats with 18 homers and 61 RBIs. Just think what he could do with a full season! ) and Pat Hengten has to be considered a shoe-in for the Cy Young award &er his stellar 20-O season. On the downside though, the Detroit Tigers racked up the worst season in major league history, going O-109. I’m sure they’ll turn it around next season. Pm thinking, maybe what, O-871 All sarcasm aside, this is easily one of the stupidest rationales I’ve ever heard. You can’t just drop games. from a *player’s . .A statistics to ~u.sw a point. There is a reason that teams play a full season. To tier irritate me, Bob Uecker, genius that he is, offered the rationale that a player who eats up a lot of innings for a team and preserves the bullpen is Cy Young material, and Pettite should win on that count. OK, then let us (the sane members of society) apply the MBS and simply ignore the fact that Hentgen threw 8 more complete games and 40 more innings. That didn’t really help anyone at all. Then again, what do you expect from a guy who spent several years “acting” on Mr. Behedme? So, I’m going to plead to those evil American conspirators that they stop putting microphones in the faces of really stupid people. Otherwise, we9 have to send Mulder and Scully tier you. And if anyone can root out a good conspiracy, it’s Fox Mulder. WANTED: Established franchise with lackluster offence seeking highly motivated people who canscore goals, complete passes and generally skate well. Previous experience not neccessary, we will train. Excellent benefits and ridiculously high pay fiaranteed. Contact Cliff at (416) 870-LEAF. Stu Grirnson need not apply.

I’m really starting to get sick of Jeff Maier. That little 12-year old punk has become too famous too quickly, and for all the wrong reasons. Maier is the kid who, by sticking his glove out into the field of play, turned a sure out for the Baltimore Orioles into a home run for the New York Yankees in game one of the American League Championship Series. This tied the ball game at four,’ and the Yankees won the game in extra innings. Basically, this kid singlehandedly (or perhaps single-glovedly) cost the Orioles game one. You can say all you want about umpire Rich Garcia, who admittedly made the wrong call on the play. The fact of the matter is that umpires blow calls (either accidentally or intentionally) and Maier shuuld never have interfered in the first place. I know what you’re thinking: if I was in his position and a ball was coming towards me I would do the exact same thing. Well guess what - you’re wrong. I, unlike some people, have a brain, and 1 know better rhan to intetiere with a game. You go to a game to watch, not participate. I don’t care how old you are. l3efore every game, they announce please do non inte$w with thegame in progress. They do this for a reason, people. So fine; the kid interferes in the play

and affects its outcome. Does the story end there? No. The’ next day, instead of being criticized or just plain being left alone, the kid goes on all the New York morning radio talk shows. A New York newspaper, in a really brilliant move, bought him front row seats to game two. Great, let’s put him in a seat where he can interfere with the game again+ His parents didn’t punish him because they were too busy riding his wave of popularity. The kid didn’t even get kicked out of the stadium for crying out loud. Great, a meddling louse now gets portrayed as a hero. To make matters worse, the kid gets interviewed and is asked about the play. The only thing he was sorry about was that the ball bounced off of his glove and he didn’t get it. Not even an acknowledgement of his interference. What a little brat. You know and I know that ifthat kid would’ve turned a catchable Oriole fly ball into a home run and cost the Yankees the game, he wouldn’t have got out of Yankee Stadium al&e. To commit the intefierence was bad enough, but to show no remorse and to become famous because of it is just plain nuts. Is baseball really that desperate for a hero? One piece of advice to Jeff Maier: if you ever go on a cross-country tour, you might do well to skip Baltimore, I’ve heard they’re spitting mad about the whole thing.

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BA&fX~ON

OUAA

TEAM

GPW

Western Waterloo Guelph Laurier Toronto York Windsor McMaster

6 6 6 6 6 6 6 6

Results Oct. 10 12

1 1 2 3 3 3

0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

169 107 148 133 78 136 90 22

58 67 92 125 105 121 134 181

10 10 8 6 6 6 2 0

5 5 4 3 3 3 15 0

Western York Guelph Waterloo

Laurier Toronto McMaster Windsor

31 44 15

West Sectional October

OWIAA

1 at Waterloo 11th & 12th

TEAM

W-L

Western Waterloo Guelph McMaster Brock

4-o 3-l 2-2 l-3 o-4

35 35 19 16 5

8 3 0 13

OUAA OUAA FINALS St. Andrew's

- October 7th & 6th Golf Club, Aurora

TEAM RESULTS

CIAU FOOTBALL TOP TEN 1. Saskatchewan Huskies 2. WESTERN MUSTANGS 3. St. Francis Xavier X-Men 4. Alberta Golden Bears 5. WATERLOO WARRIORS 6. Calgary Dinosaurs 7. Ottawa Gee Gees 8. LAURIER GOLDEN HAWKS 9. McGill Redmen 9. GUELPH GRYPHONS ********************************************

RUGBY

OUM DIV.

McMaster

Queen's Western York Guelph Waterloo DIV.

RMC Laurier Carleton Brock Trent Toronto

65 64 63 62 614 60 GP

65 64 63 53 514 60

0 1 2 3 5

1 1 1 1 1 1

155 172 137 62 92 75

86 72 104 124 136 171

11 9 7 5 3 1

1 1 2 2

0 1 1 0 0 0

153 138 96 143 25 39

45 90 83 80 133 163

Oct.

Queen's Brock McMaster Western RMC Carleton

55 37 34 26 39 21

Waterloo Laurier York Guelph Trent Toronto

TEAM

MON

TUES

* Ottawa * Laurier York Guelph Windsor Western ~McMaster Waterloo Queen's Brock Toronto Trent

302 309 314 321 322 322 321 343 337 332 340 368

320 313 319 317 317 328 329 322 329 340 350 367

622 622 633 638 639 650 650 665 666 672 690 735

Ottawa Queen's York Carleton Trent Toronto Ryerson

10. 11 9 9 9 9 9

8 5 6 4 2 2 0

0 1 2 3 5 6 9

2 5 1 2 2 2 0

25 31 25 10 615 12 141

2 8 10 13

26 20 19 14 8 5 0

WEST DIV.

Laurier Western Guelph McMaster Waterloo Brock Windsor

9 9 10 10 9 9 10

4 4 4 4 3 2 0

0 1 2 2 4 4 8

5 4 4 4 2 3 2

13, 19 9 15 11 13 12

6 9 9 7 19 14 25

17 16 16 16 11 9 2

* Tiebreaker: each team:

scores Ottawa

Remltti Oct. 9

11 1 12

Trent Laurier Waterloo McMaster Queen's Ottawa Carleton Queen's

TEAM

of 5th player on 81, Laurier 82

OUAA GPW

10 9 7 6 2 0

Queen's Carleton Laurentian Toronto Ryerson York Trent

11 4 94 10 4 9 3' 9.3 93 90

1 0 2 2 3 5 8

6 5 4 4 3 1 1

16 18 13 io 9 14 732

12 6 9 7 12 19

18 17 16 13 12 10 1

WEST DIV.

19 20 0 16 0 11

McMaster Guelph Laurier Western Brock Waterloo Windsor

10 10 95 94 9 92 10

6 5

2 0 1 2 5 7 8

2 5 3 3 2 0 1

22 14 11 12 10 10 17

12 6 7 9 16 26 20

20 20 18 15 8 6 4

Resulta Oct. 9

11 12 13

1 1 1 0 0 1 0 2

POINTS

FIELD

39 37 36 33 23 17 3 1

HOCKEY

OWIAA TEAM

York Toronto Waterloo Queen's Western McGill Guelph Carleton Trent

14 11 13 11 14 ll 13 ll 14

13 11 9 5 4 3 2 2 0

1 0 3 3 8 6 7 8 13

0 Cl 1 3 2 2 4 1 1

64 72 31 13 12 627 10 844 3

2 2 13 17 29

26 22 19 13 10 8 8 5 1

38 47

Results Waterloo Laurier McMaster

Oct.

Toronto Western Windsor Guelph Ryerson York Trent Carleton

Queen's McMaster McGill York Western Toronto Laurier Waterloo

SOCCER

1 1 2 0 10 2 2 2

OWIAA

EAST DIV.

Results

EAST DIV.

GOLF

********************************************

(continued)

Toronto Queen's Carleton York Carleton

Windsor Western Guelph Trent Ryerson Trent Laurentian Queen's

0 1 1 0 1 0 1 0

Oct.

9 York 11

'Guelph York Toronto

Waterloo

3 1 5 9 5

Waterloo Western Guelph

0 1 0

Western

Trent

Head to, Head Hardcore I

by Patrick Imprint

by Andrew Kiywaniuk Imprint staB

Wilkins staff

ard Core LJ~O is about a band on the road. That’s all the plot that reviewer will provide, partly because he doesn’t want to give too much away, but mainly because that is ali there is to give away. There is a band (Hard Core Logo, a prototypical member of Vancouver’s 1970s punk scene) and a road (the Trans Canada, which has servedMcDonald so well previously). Eventually the road ends, and everything else ends with it. The movie is hailed asthe final chapter in director Bruce McDonald’s “rock ‘n’ roll trilogy,” but the real link behveen the three films is McDonald’s love of the road. The three films are all are journey tales, wherein the purpose and result of the characters’ travel is not as important as what they do on the trip there. But while only tangentially similar to H@mwy 61, Hurd Core Logo is the philosophical twin sibling to Roadk ill, McDonald’s frost film, Both are absorbing talesof the rock ‘n’ road lifestyle and those who live it; about bands torn apart by internal pressures and reunited by the love of music, only to find tragedy. This time around, however,McDonald has a lot more experience and a lot more money, and his goal is not to tell a fiction but to create a history. Both on and off the screen, Hard Core Logo blurs the lines between movie and documentary. Weeks before the film’s release, classified ads in Canadian music papers begged for =authentic Hard Core Logo bootlegs .” A promotional ‘zine entitledCrasp theEdit offers the C(factsnbehind the recreation of Hard Core Logo’s actual last tour. The movie itself never lets up its pretense of being an actual documentary. McDonald (who, reprising his Roadkill cameo, appears as a documentary director) and his camera fight for every minute of film. The band is spied on, goaded by, and eventually fights with McDonald and his film crew. The only thing that shows this not to be a documentary, in fact, is that no honest director would involve himself so directly in someone else’s story. W& Hard Cme LO&O, McDonald’s love affair with the rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle has come to a fitting climax. Hugh Dillon stars as Hard Core Logo frontman Joe Dick, a role which Dillon’s years as Headstones lead singer make as natural as spitting. Dillon brings with him an accountability to the realities of rock music-nothing is allowed to be romanticized. Backstages are grimy, the tour bus is a dive, old groupies bring their children to meet the band, new groupies run off with gig money, and the musicians are assholes. It’s more of a moving snapshot than a movie; plot is simple, but character and emotion run deep. Ifs the harsher side of Canada that we rarely see, one that may even seem unrealistic to those ur&miliar with the Canadian music world. Hard CmeLqBo is as raw and unashamed as a raised middle fmger. It is, in short, the ultimate Canadian rock ‘n’ roil movie.

Joe Dick (Hugh Dillon) in his natural environment.

Hard Core Logo directed by Bruce McDonald playing at the Priticess Cinema, October IS-25

ighly acclaimed director Bruce McDonald’s latest filmHard Core r;o80 hits the big screen tonight, McDonald’s other movies, R~+&ill, Hz&bway 61, and Dunce Me Oahde, have earned him a solid reputation as a quirky, humourous director. As the pre-show hype for HYrd CUW ti~o mounted, movie and music fans alike were wondering if McDonald could live up to that 1 reputation. Hard CmLogo follows a fictional Vancouver punk band as they reunite for one last tour of western Canada. Far more pensive than This is Sphul Tap, only slightly less violent than Man Bites Dtg, Hard C~eL+u~u is shot in the same pseudo-documentary style. Last week a couple members of the Imprint St&attended a sneak preview of the film, which is based on Michael Turner’s book of the same name. Opinions were mixed.

The bad

Billy Tallent, Pipen-,

John Oxenberger,

Joe Dick

anadians have come to expect a lot from Bruce MacDonald. His movC ies have become Canadian c@t classics. I have a hard time supressing my laughter every time an American border guard hassles me. MacDonald’s films are relevant to us because they are light-hearted and sincere; because we understand the struggle of that vague Canadian identity in the great, wide, American world. Perhaps thafs why Hard Cm Lcgu was such a ’ disappointment to me. Or maybe I just prefer movies where staying awake doesn’t take such a concerted effort. What makes MacDonald’s earlier work special is his quirky characters, his pointed satire, and his uniquely Canadian window on the world. The characters inHard tic I2180 are its strong point and the poignant humour shines through on occasion, but there is nothing Canadian about this movie aside from the names of the cities on the map and the gratuitous clips of local Vancouver bands in concert. Hard Cure Lgo, (henceforth referred to as H+C1-), is billed asthe third and finalchapter inMacDonaLd’s “Rock & Roll Trilogy,” but the label is misleading. Ro&a and Hg&$iway 61 are films that deal with ordinary people: naive everymen who are lost in the insanity of the real world, of show business, and America. IY+CI- takes a totally different perspective. Instead of a normal movie we get a docudrama-an incoherent collage of interviews, pastoral landscapes, and acid trips that is far too influenced by today’s music videos for its own good. There is a disturbing new idea in the movie industry that uninspired acting ahd home video style camerawork can make a movie seem more charming and realistic. This parallels the recent trend in the music industry against skilled musicianship (or “showing ofFas it is ofien called). This is a blatant fallacy. It could be argued that MacDonald’s intention is to portray life on the road without gbrifjring it or making it seem more exciting than it really is, but a realistic film &out mundane events is stiU just a boring movie. The one redeeming point of IY+CI- is the portrayal of the band members. The band’s looney-tune bassist is a well-placed engima, and Hugh Dillon is excellent as the loud-mouthed Joe Dick-1 suspect this is type-casting. Perhaps the movie would have been improved if the smouldering tensions beolveen the characters hadn’t been interrupted so frequently by meaningless fUer. Lurking somewhere withinH;ard Cme Lo80 is the germ of a good movie, but it is not struggling very hard to get out. Perhaps a fU hour of this movie could have been edited out without losing any vital plot devehpment, and I consider that to be a fatal weakness. Hayd Cwe boo was a major let down for me and I can’t recommend t-his h, even to hardcore Bruce fans. I k119w you’ll probably ignore my advice and see it anyway, but for goodness sake, don’t skip your midterms or anything.

ARTS

IMPEUNT,+

Friday, October 18, 1996

Get some Therapy? I

hboys w/ % erapy? Vdcam

Monday, October I4 by Patrick Imprint

Wilkins staff

133 Weber Street,

North,

WATERLOO

inosaur, Jr. opening for Alanis Mqrissette. They Might Be Giants opening for Hoc&e and the Blow&h. It’s a shame, really, that our modern music industry relegates respectable, hard-working bands to opener status for media-hyped soulless firecrackers. And while I have more respect for the Doughboys than either a bandwagon-jumping synthpop pusher gone ah-rock or an overly lucky 54-40 cover band, the idea of Therapy? opening for the Montreal band was at fust unthinkable. The Volcano’s posters did, however, read “(from Ireland) ,” and it turns out that the Doughboys spent some time in Europe recently, opening for Ire-

746-4983

land’s biggest (and loudest) band on tour. The Doughboys returned the .favour on a handti of Canadian stops, of which the Volcano was the last. “Hey Kitchener-we’re firom Dublin, Ireland, and we’re going to kick your foockin’ ass!” shouted Therapv? frontman Andy Cairns in that ’ Trtzinspotting-ly vogue brogue. The crowd went wild, as would any crowd of less than a hundred waiting for a world-class rock band. Therapy? launched into ?Nausea” with the intensity of a car bomb, five years offrnely tuned anger let loose through a pair of club speakers. It was the most powerful show I’ve ever seen at the Volcano. To be less qualified, it was one of the most powerful shows I’ve seen, ever, partly due to the intimacy of the venue but mostly because Therapy? are an amazing band. Infused with a dark wit and massive amounts of energy, trashing equipment and even covering the Bee Gees, Therapy? ruled the stage.

After such a display, the Doughboys had a lot to live up to, and they didn’t. The crowd was noticeably thinner tier Therapy?% set, and Doughhead John Kastner didn’t win my Section with his rock star attitude. Seeing the Doughboy’s bland power pop tier Therapy’s kickassdisplay of metal madness was like trying to down seltzer water after fine wine; it goes down easily enough, but with neither the kick nor the flavour. The Doughboys surprised me, though. I’d always thought they were a band with one good song that they played over and over again; that night, however, I learned to distinguish no lessthan three original rif&! The night would have been much better had the Doughboys had the sense to keep their opener status, but the fm who didn’t leave early got the encore they were waiting for: the members of both bands jamming on “My Generation.” And vou missed it.

TheGodfather of B&pop.. l&y Davies lhnfmth Muic Hall Saturday, Oct. 12 by Mike McNulty special tu Imprint 1000’s

pairs

ebel, rocker, clown, pop icon. That’s Ray Davies, the brilliant song-writer and front-man for those 60’s rockers, The Kinks. Currently on tour promoting the release of To The Bone, a double CD collection of re-worked Kinks material, and X-Ray, his autobiography, it was sheer bliss to catch Davies in an intimate and personal setting. After all, this is the guy who wrote twenty hit singles between ‘64 and ‘70, and whose band figured centrally in the British Invasion, along with the Beatles and the Rolling Stones. Hearing him per6orm acoustic versions of tunes like “You Really Got Me,” ?U.l DayandAlloftheNight,““Srmny Afternoon,” ‘cA Well-Respected Man,” “Stop Your Sobbing,” and ccLola’ywas like having one of the greatest ever rock ‘n’ rollers jamming in one’s own living room, and was surely the highlight of the two hour-plus performance. Davies was in fine form ashe came strummin’, croonin’, and flailin his bandy legs about to a dance of another era. Accompanied only by Pete Mathison, a lead guitarist of considerable talent, Davies played with a dexterity and vocal precision which made it seem as ifit was yesterday, and

not thirty years ago, that these songs were first played. Over the years Ray Davies has produced a staggering amount of material. Being influential as well asprolific, he has hada steady and profound effect on modern music, with old school punks like The Stranglers, The Jam, and The Pretenders covering his tunes. The best songs that guitarwanking metal band Van Halen ever did were Kinks covers. This impact continues today, with Davies being branded “the Godf;lther of Britpop” while outfits like Pulp, Blur, Oasis, and the Boo Radleys all take their cue from the old master. In addition to being one of the best songwriters in pop music, Davies revealed himself to be a captivating storyteller-fLlfil.ling the 3heatrical” aspect of the billing by acting out his stories and imitating the accents and mannerisms of their characters. His occasional mischievous smile allowed us to glimpse the prankster and clown just below the surface of this fifty-something English bloke. - Fingering a dog-eared copy ofX-Ray, Davies, like some crazed juke-box, dispensed anecdotes about the behind the scenes goings-on of the early rock ‘n’ roll scene, which ranged from exciting to depressing to hilarious. On the downside, Davies provided insight into the trials and tribulations of travelling musicians, and about a seedy and corrupt music industry which can

make or break a band with the stroke of a pen. For Davies, there clearly remains some residual bitterness about the Kinks being banned fram touring America at the height of their fame, and onerous Litigation regarding royalties, %hich is still going on to this day.” Such justifiable swiping at music industry executives, coupled with Davies’ sometimes offcolour humour, rife with sexual innuendo, was the low-point of thebperformance, but rather than spoiling the show it shone a light into his soul, betraying to the audience the earthly reality of the rock-star. What we saw then was a man who has been on a Rock ‘n’ Roll roller-coaster nearly all of his life, reeling at the euphoric height of fame and fortune, and plunging into angst when the band was not doing well. His later songs testify to a flirtation with mental illness and despair over the possibility of becoming obscure, and it istrue that while the Kinks have had some hits over the last twenty years, they have never been able to climb back to their early prominence. All of this perhaps explains why Davies stuck to the (really) old tunes, and ignored the mass of material he’s created since then. Better to be remembered at his creative peak, I suppose, than to fade away-a fate worse thandeath for the rebel rocker. Judging by his rousing pel-formance, fade away is apparently the last thing Ray Davies wants to do.

ARTS

Friday, October 18, 1996

IMPRINT,

Hollywood Hotline North by Robert Jackson special to Imprint Here’s what’s on the hot sheet this week.. . . It seems the loveable cast of Sendi have finally settled their contract woes with NBC. YOU may remember in the summer when the four were complaining about their paltry salaries of only $28,000 per episode-the minimum payment for any sitcom. Negotiations are now complete, and the happy foursome are now pulling in $75,000 per episode, with a stipulation that will see them making $175,000 per episode before their contract runs out in the year 2000. Ahh, to be inshowbiz....stillthefiguresseem meagre to Frazier sm Kekey Grammer who makes $250,000 per episode, or better yet, Bill Cosby who pulls in a cool one million dollars per episode for his new show. In other news$??Vtty W-982 is currently starting production south of the border, but this time minus superstar Jtia Roberts. Instead, British bombshell and Estee Lauder spokeswoman Elizabeth Hurley gets top billing. Sources say that Roberts dumped the project tier reading the script, while others say it was tier a fight with costar Richard Gere. It seems Hollywood just can’t get enough of 60’s television shows. This time, it’s Bapitche/l that’s slated for a big-screen remake. Alicia Silverstone is in the running to play nose-twitching Samantha Stevens. Producers opted for the 20-year-old

Silverstone afier their original choice,Nicole Kidman, declined the role. NHbm E?cposu~8star Rob Morrow is a possibility to play the role of Darren. Speaking of TV re-makes, Tom Arnold is currently starting production on a big screen version of&fcHale’s Navy, andIBisney is trying to secure the rights for a motion picture based onThe Love Boat series. . Hey, at least it’s not the Best Wstern! Finally, it seems that one last XFZd&au Jmes movie will be made. After constant script revisions hrn both George Lucas and the Hip’s troubles in the AmeriThe Tragklly Hip Harrison Ford, the project has can market, and it did seem to The Cbamlem Club, been confirmed. Steven Spielberg, affect their performance. They apLattcust~, Pennyivanh who directed all three Indy movTuesday, October 1 peared uneasy, perhaps because ies, has also stated that he will there were only about 300 peodirect the final episode as well. by Fayyaz Wlani ple, of which 200 were CanadiSpielberg originally declined, special to Imprint ans, in a 600-capacity venue. saying that after directing Did screaming Canadian fans, Sclbitadler’sList, he did not w;lllt he flyer described The including a large Waterloo conto make any more movies &Gut tingent, care about the turnout? Tragically Hip asa “Cana“make believe Nazi%.” Sources, dian super band,” and No! Did they love the fact that however, report that the new stated that %s of press time we they were able to stand 2 feet movie will not be centred around have sold nearly one hundred tickaway from the band for the low Hitler or the Nazi’s, and will in ets to Canadians that will travel to price of $lO? Yes! How close fact take place quite a few years Lancaster just to see the band at were we? Ask Eva, who almost tier the Second World War. In got kicked in the face by Gordie’s the Chameleon, Come check out the film, Indiana will be an older what has all our neighbours to the flailing leg, or Todd who got spat man (Ford isn’t getting any north so excited,” on as Gordie drooled out his lyryounger!), and more than likely One hundred tickets? Hardly ics passionately. the senior Jones, Sean Cannery, Whatever the circumstances, a noteworthy figure considering will not make an appearance. the Hip were in fine form and the gargantuan venues The Hip However, watch for Kevin easily sell out just hours north of sounded tight, clearlydemonstratCostner to play Indiana’s long this artsie college town. ing their evolution from their lost brother. This says something about harder rock sound to the more Obviously, the plotline of the story is being kept VERY secret by Lucas, but rumours have been circulating around the Lust City ofAtlantis or even Indfs involvement in the 1949 UFO cover-up in Rosewell, New Mexico,. . .either way, fans will have to wait until the year 2000, when the film will finaily hit theatres.

photo

by Fayyaz

Vellani

musically diverse feel of their latest release, Trouble in the Heahouse, with warm classicalguitars and pleasant harmonies. From their opening number, “Gift Shop” to the fti song in the line-up, the hit “Ahead By A _ Century,” they plugged solidly through 15 songs from their last three albums, including the classics “Fully Completely,” ccCourage,” Xocked in the Trunk of a Car” and “100th Meridian,” embellished by a couple of inaudible Gordie monologues. &er the closer “Fire in the Hole;” the band lefi with no encore, and went immediately to the tour bus. Fans were disappointed, and those who sought audience with the band stood outside the bus to no avail. Needless to say, it was still worth the nine hour drive each way.

Goinghomefor Thanksgiving...

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Thursday

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and Chevron

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24 & Friday

October

in the Student

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ARTS

IMPRINT,

Friday, October 18, 1996

Radio Ga Ga by Astrid Sealey special to Imprint

with Hewlett Packa

e Hcws : Mon. - Fri. 9:OOm Math and Computer EMding rm. 2018 Nor&h Entrance Math and Comwter

Buildin

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 24,1996 HP REAL LIFE ROADSHOW

AT WATERLOO

-I

isten up everybody-to 100.3 FM that is, the frequency that will turie you into Radio Waterloo CKMS. For those of you who have never heard(of)us,CKMS100.3FMis your independently run radio station affiliated with UW, recognized by the CRTC, and we’re right on campus, even though you can’t see us ‘cause we’re buried somewhere behind Optometry and tk North Campus Ret Complex. Check out upcoming editions of Imprint to find out about what CKMS has to offer; from music to community information, and specialty programs catered toward recognized groups and special interests. For your listening pleasure, we program poetry and dramaFreeMovement, M 5 p.m.; women’s programs-Leaping Lesbians, T 6 p.m.; and multi-cultural interest programs-Stereo Latino, F 6 p.m., Turkish, Islamic, Indian, etc. Information and discussion programming includes pop culture-Super Cool Wagon,Not So Cool Wagon, F 11 p.m.; extreme and experimental musiShrunken Head, W 9 p.m., Temporary Autonomous Zone, Sa 11 p.m.; reviews and concert listings-FMMagazine, F4:3Op.m.; and UW infdhew the Fat, R 5 p.m. We have this month and No-

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Ask questions, test drive rl the equipment and ta-ke advantageoftheUWComputer Store’s Representatives eagerly waiting in- .: L store to show you the great I. ?B values on a wide selection of HP products, in stock and ready to go home with you today!

Come see the HP RealLife Road Show.

vember live to air concerts of local talent-Saturdays at 10 p.m. Music programs range from jazz and urban, hip-hop and rap, folk, classical, rock, women’s music, punk, industrial, Conternporary Christian-basically anything you feel like wrapping your ears around. So, we’d like to give you a brief synopsis of how we sprang from the loins of UW bureaucracy... We’ve been fully licensed and on air officially since October 1977, and we were the third campus radio station to be broadcast over an FM frequency. Funding is provided in part by a nominal fee paid by every UW student, and fundraising occurs frequently over the year. CKMS 100.3 broadcasts from our studio behind Optometry which was built due to UW Planning’s idea that the tower detracted from the Arts Library’s appearance, if that’s at all possible. If you have any questions or requests, or you’d like information about services or volunteering, you can get hold of us at 886CKMS (886-2567). Pick up our program guide conveniently and strategically located at many places around campus. Or ifyou’re standing next to your radio right now, tune in to 100.3 FM and see what we’re really about.. And for all our ftithfui and fiXure listeners, thanks for your support!

NICEF (the United Nations Children’s Fund) celebrates 50 years with a fabulous fundraising night organized by B.O.B-Beyond the Orange Box. On Thursday, October 24, 1996,at8:00p.m.,B.O.Bproudly presents a frightfully funny evening at the Opera House (735 Queen St. East, Toronto) with three local bands gathered in a Halloween celebration to raise awareness and funds for the UNICEF cause. Tickets for the event are $20 and there will be orange UNICEF boxes for sale with great prizes inside, everything from sweatshirts and CDs to restaurant gift. certificates and a spa getaway. The night’s entertainment is supplied by three local bands, Blaxam, Orquesta Kiave y Konga and Que Vida!, each providing their own unique sounds in a world beat salute to UNICEF. This year’s B.0.B event at 8:00 p.m. on Oct. 24 promises a Halloween Hootenany with the spirited sounds offunk, pop, salsa, acid jazz, and more. The bands are: Blaxam (Pronounced ‘Black

Sam’): A powerful seven-piece soul/m outfit fronted by a trio of fmtastic female vocalists. Covering ’70s funk and ’90s acid jazz, Blaxam perfarms a funky hip repertoire that includes smooth harmonies, distinctive originals and beautifully executed covers. Orquesta Klave y Kongo: A nine-piece band with a sound rooted in the Cuban tradition of San Montuno-the folkloric music that inspired salsa. Striking guitar playing over a complex rhythm and brass accompaniment infused with Latin jazz makes for a deliciously danceable set. Que Vida! : Self-described as CLauthentic Cuban style sleaze rock,” this band delivers a powerful guitar-driven punch with a Latin surf twist. Fronted by Andrew Whiteman, former member of the Bourbn Tabernacle Choir, the four hombres pay homage to a South American sound. A well-known Toronto D. J will be spkming the tunes-between sets to make this B.0.B event a non-stop night of partying and fundraising. For more information or tickets, contact Paul Baines at 746 0990.

even started yet.

Sega Saturn by Joe Palmer Imprint stafr

rice, long ago there was a game calledSti~e74&+zti BPOJ.The character’s movements consisted of block steps and, if you looked closely, you could see that the character’s feet never left the ground. The color of the background was a solid tone and any clouds or vines were very flat and unmoving. The entire thing was very two-dimensional. Despite all this, the game was a huge success,The reason? It was a well-designed and fLn game. Later, on the Sega Genesis, the world was introduced to the marvellous and zippy Smtic the Hfx&e~og. The characters’ movements were far more fluid. The colour palette consisted of two hundred and fiftysix colors. The backgrounds had multiple levels that moved independently of one another, giving a deep sense of perspective. Visually, the game was f;ir more shxlning than its predecessor. Yet again it was an excellent design that made this game popular, not its graphics.

Once again a new series of more powerful game systems have been born unto the video garne market. For the Sega Saturn, the developers of Sonic the HedJe& have just released NiGlFTS. The game is being marketed as a true 3D game. When I first played this game I was hoping to be able to fly not only in the standard directions but also towards and away from the screen. At first I was impressed. At the begin-

ning of the game your character falls asleep only to find him or hefself in a magic dreamland called Nightopia. In Nightopia an evil entity called Wizeman is stealing Ideya, the magic dream energy found in humans. Your goal is to recover all the stolen Ideya and defeat Wizeman. When you first enter the dream world you are free to roam in a 180 degree axis. This is the true 3D environment Sega promises. However, the real game hasn’t

Event&ly you must find NIGHTS, one of the magical denizens of Nightopia. With his help you can defeat Wizeman. When you take over the role of NiCHTS you are finally given the power of flight. At last, you can now move in all axes. But wait! No, you can’t! It was at this point that I began to see that this game wasn’t all it was hyped up to be. You are still flying in a 3D environment but you C~JBno longer move “into” the screen. While you control the XGHES character you are basically in a glorified 2D side scroller. The background perspective is magticent, but you can still only move in the same directions as always. This in itself would not have disappointed me too much. It would have been very disorienting to find all the stars (needed to defeat the scene bosses). It would have been difficult, to say the least. Unfortunately, the most disappointing aspect of this game is the lack of interesting places to go. The game play lacks the depth which brought greatness to its predecessors. This game is one of the best-Z&&~ games I’ve played, but it doesn’t offer many improvements over games like Sank. If you’re looking for a visually stunning game ATiGHTS is for you. If you’re looking for a garne with a lot of depth, keep on waiting.

Baku Baku Sega Saturn by Dave Lynch Imprint staff Tt

all started when I came into the Imprint office one day. You know, an average day. In fact, there was “othing to differentiate that particular day from any other-except for the presence of the Sega Saturn. No problem. Or so I thought. So I picked up one of the CDs, Bakzc B&u was written on the packaging. Some animals on the cover. Looked pretty lame, arcs of laserlight flash across the screen, Somebody muttered, “It’s kinda l.ikeT&&,” blowing your adversaries out of the air. Teti on acid, maybe. VVhichbringsmetothegraphicsGood, In fact, it was a lot like Teti. Squares descending down the screen, and you die Very good. This ti the strength of the Saturn, and the developers have done themwhen they pile up to the top. So far, so selves proud. The stuff looks good, and good. Squares are either animals or food, when your dragon runs off the edge of a and you have to make the food fd beside 1000 foot cli@, you just might feel a little the animals or vice versa. Rabbits eat carqueasy in your guts. rots, monkeys eat bananas, dogs eat bones, One other new feature is the insane Land so on, laser freak-out option; RememberZ%eI;&ct Then all hell breaks loose. The small, Sta$Jhtw? When the time is right, hit one two-dimensional picture of the animal button and sit back. Your lasers go insane, jumps out of the screen to become a 3-D firing an intense barrage into just about monstrosity that eats up all the food in the everything. Much death, Much devasta- vicinity and unceremoniously drops what it ate on your opponent’s side of the screen. tion. Cool, but use it sparingly. Another feature that both Dragoons As the food of one animal gets eaten, have is the roving radar. Your radar covers chain reactions start, and other animals

Panzer Draeoon Zwei Sega S”a;urn by James Russell Imprint stair

’

n essence, you fly around on a dragon (just a little one, and it doesn’t breathe fire) and shuot the hell out of everything. Not exactly an original concept, but this game has a few nifty features to set it apart from other games, 4 from the original Panzm llfyipn. Whereas the original had exclusively air combat, Zwei also has some cool ground combat scenes, Your mount is hauling ass down this valley floor and there are evil things hot on your tail, tin& the sand. Seen TrewuwSor Sm~arners?A little unnerving, because you have to wait for them to launch themselves into the air before you can toast them. And as far as toasting stufFgoes, the gun-lock feature is definitely cool. Hold down the fire button and scroll across the bad guys. You can lock onto up to eight of them. release the fire button and brilliant

only

degrees,

but

you

can

rotate

around front/back and lefi/right to cover everything. Very handy. I like this game. It’s exciting, and it looks and sounds good. The features keep things interesting and a little challenging. While not radically different from the original, Pa~~zer fiu!a~m Zwei is a deftite improvement and worth picking up-

start eating

their

food.

Then

food

and

drop. More eating, more droppings, more eating, more droppings. It’s pandemonium! The best way I can describeB&u B&u is, with apologies to TkHS$Otting, take the best Tetrisgame you ever had, and multiply it by a thousand times. It’s better than that. So I Iokayed. An hour passed. The sun . animals

set. The sun rose, 5till, I played on. People with lives passed me by, curious that such ~gamecouldbecomesuchan&lictio~Oh God, I thought, what if1 never stop? Well, just one more game. Then they took it away, The bastards. Who could stop cold turkey? Or, asit were, cold carrot, rabbit, dog, panda, mouse, cheese and everything else? I’ve since tried playing T&, &J&&E+ Minmwp, and anything else I can get my hands on. It’s not the same. There aren’t even any support groups that I can go to for help. Curse the day I laid my hands onB& BakN.

Live! Toni&t! Sell-outs!

by Chris Edginton Imprint stafF A live Nirvana album seemed nearly inevitable. It was just a matter of time before Fm De Mu&yBurksOfThe VVS4u-h was released and now that no new

material will ever be written, its timing seems perfect. Does this live record capture anything new? A good question; certainly one worth asl$ng. We’ve been through the B-sides with I&z&c& and the acoustic gig with Unplh~ed, so how many variations does one need? Granted, each has its merits, but the show seems over. From The Muddy Buutk~... . contains no new material and really no interesting versions of past material, ne record samples a wide range of Nirvana’s career from as early as London in 1989 through to Seattle in 1994. More memorable performances include their I991 West Coast tour (shortly tier the release of NV-&~) which rendered “aggressive” versions of “Drain You,” “Aneurysm,” and “Smells Like Teen Spirit.” Also sampled is “Lithium” from England’s 1992 Reading Festival, a particularly interesting

version, but certainly not enough to carry the entire disk. What’s most disconcerting: is the lack of anything even milily fresh. Sure it’s live and this is Nirvana’s first electric live album, but the songs here sway only slightly from their previously recorded versions, with the odd exception. Songs like “School” and “Heart-Shaped Box” sound like outtakes, n-king the disk seem more like a greatest hits package than a live record. From The Muddy Banks of T%e WuL7ka.his miidlv entertaining, but its appeal is slowly lost as the tracks progress. For -the fan who has to have the comDlete B sidesjacous tic/live trio, F&n l7z Mddy Banks.. . has its merits, but all in all, its motives seems suspicious. I won’t call it a cash COW but I’ll still be picking beef from between my teeth long afier the disk is over.

by Justin Mathews Imprint stdf If you’ve heard these two bands, you’re probably wondering what they’re doing in the same review. They don’t sound like each other, and they don’t have the same people involved. What they do have in common is that together they are going to serve as a basis for my ranting. One of the biggest problems I have with much of the music coming out these days is that they fd into generics. In CS, we learn that generics are a way of reusing the same old thing over and over again with just a couple of minor changes. Lately, it seems like the majority of the music industry is following a similar concept. w So, take your generic mould for an indie rock band from Canada (in the same mould as the Gandharvas and Watchmen) and change

the name

of the song titles

and the people in the band, and you’ve got &e Last Supper. These guys aren’t really bad musicians by any means. They do what they do quite well. The only problem is, it’s been done before. The bio that came with this CD

by Patrick Imprint

L Y F T I

‘Wilkins staff :. .

The title says it all: four cellos play Metallica’s greatest hits. Only in Scandinavia, creative centre of all that is unholy in metal music, would four students take time from studying Haydn and Verdi to learn Hetfeld and Ulrich. “Enter Sandman” and “Master of Puppets” are captured as never heard before, along with “Harvester of Sorrow,” “The Unforgiven, ” “Sad But True,” “Creeping Death,” Vherever I May Roam,” and ccWelcome Home (Sanitarium) .” The players involved are from one of Finland’s finest classical music schools; the album is as crisp as any good chamber recording should be. Anyone who doubts the songwriting abilities ofthe world’s formerly most famous metal band

praises the single ‘7gnorance” for getting played on Mu&Music’s Indie Spotlight. Well, of course they got plaved. Mu&Music plays anything generiL. They even played Mudgirl. Who’s Mudgirl? Take any of your favourite %lternativef) (in the bastardized sense ofthe word) modern rock bands and insert Kim Bingham into the lead role. Sure, her voice isn’t bad, and at least it’s not an ann@ng techno band, but haven’t I heard this before? I know it’s supposedly a new release, but whJ7does it sound so fan&ar? Didn’t I hear this song on CFNY about a year or two ago? Oh well, I guess it doesn’t matter. It’s catchy, melodic and filled with the same old guitar chords. The kids love it. And that’s all that really matters now, isn’t it? I know perfectly well that while there is an awful lot of generic

music

out

there right now, there is also a lot of good, creative,

original

mu-

sic toa But all that makes it to the shelves of most record stores are the generics. It sold

(now, sadly, merely one of the world’s many alternative bands) should listen to Apocalyptica. Stripped of all but melody, Metallica’s music is revealed as beautill, simple in theme yet grandiose in gesture, my expressive and moving. Metalheads have known that for years; now they can trick their parents into liking “that damned noise” as well. Unlike many other cover albums,Apotalyptia PhysMetallica By Few C&u has strong replay value, both as a classical instrumental work and as a hard-assed rock album. Metallica fans take note-this album is better than Lad.

before, it’ll sell again. But I guess my rantings don’t matter. Bands like this can make a little money for their owners (the record companies): and the masses seem to like having the same old shit fed to them over and over again.

IMPRINT,

Friday, October 18, 1996

ARTS ONICS FASTER!

Workbench@ STUDENT EDITION The ekcthmics lab in u c~m/lu~TM Have your own virtual electronics lab! Learn electronics - not netlisls . Mixed analog/digital simulation Easy to learn, easy to use Import and Export SPICE netlists Windows (3.1,95, NT) or Mac available Until Jan. 31/97, Umierstmzding SPICE Netlists book, FREE ($19 value). l

What can be said about these jazz legends that hasn’t already been said? That they have revolutionized recorded jazz - already said; that they are momentous in their achievements - already known; that they arc timeless already proven. Then what can I, a humble reviewer, say about this six CD set? It is astounding! The tracks on this recording arc studio collaborations between these two musical giants. Included on the set are their three previous releasesJWesfU?ead( 1957), Pargy and Bess(1958) and Sketches of’ Spa&( 1959); their collaborations brn Quiet NZ&VS( 1962) ; their sessions with vocalist Bob Dorough; two never before released suites, “The Time of the Barracudas” (1963) and “Falling Water” ( 1968); and many alternate takes, rehearsal sessions and studio discussions that are either difficult or impossible to acquire. I was only handed what is called a ‘sampler’ CD - a selection of 13 tracks taken from the 116 selections available on the set.The word teaser comes to mind. Here I get a free CD but find myself compelled to go purchase a box

VOLUNTEERS

English tutors needed to tutor international students on a one-to-one basis in oral and written English. Once a week for one term, approx, 2-3 hrs/wk. For info call Darlene Ryan ext. 2814. Se a Big Sisters Volunteer! Training sessions commence Sept. 16,18,23/ 96 or Nov. 5,7,12/96. Please call 7435206. Wanted: energetic, enthusiastic young women to be Spark, Brownie, Girl Guide or Pathfinder leaders. Within the university vicinity. For info call Lynne at 884-8098. Volunteer driving force: do you have a car and some free time? Drivers needed to drive seniors from their home to a senior day program. Mileage is reimbursed. Contact Volunteer Services 888-6400. Volunteers needed to assist with answering phone, typing and customer service in a busy office environment. Requires at least a one year commitment. Contact Volunteer Services 8886488. Waterloo Oxford District Secondary School in Baden is looking for volunteers to help out with Special Ed Department. Excellent experience for students wanting to go to Teachers College or Social Service field. Contact Bill Bond at 634-5441 between 8:OO am & 490 om.

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(plus

call 800-263-5552

set so that I can enjoy the other 103 tracks that come in the collection. The range of jazz on this little teaser alone left me breathless. From the famous bass lines of “Miles Ahead” to the Mexican flavoured Taeta” to the Caribbean inspired “Aos Pes Da Cruz,” I fell in love with the pure jazz combinations. “Nothing Like You” is a quick-stepping vocal track that made me want to jump in my tap shoes and dance the night away. Fortunately, I’ve never taken tap so I could just sit back and listen to the rest of the album. The studio discussion on this sampler allows the listener to hear the legends speak and gives the entire package a more personal

$15

sfh)

tu order.

touch. Many CD-sets seem like a chance for the record companies to cash in on artists’ popularity, however this doesn’t seem the case with this set. Trying to collect all the selections in this collection would be next to impossible. With all the previously unreleased material plus the complete Davis and Evans previous releases, this set is designed with the true jazz aficionado in mind. Run, don’t walk, to your local CD store and get your hands on this collection. Whether vou are already a Davis and Evans fan, a jazz connoisseur, or just curious as to what jazz is all about, this is probably the best place to begin your education. Happy studies.

Volunteers needed to work with preschool children in child care settings. No previous experience with children required. 2-3 hours per week. Great experience, call Bill at Notre Dame of St. Agatha Preschool Support Service 7411122. Lexington Public School is tooking for enthusiasticvolunteers to work with students in classrooms, in small groups or on an individual basis. Call Brigitta at 747-3314 if you are interested. Kitchener Parks and Recreation - for info regarding the following call Deb 741-2226: Sledge hockey coaches needed! No experience necessary, training provided. Modified hockey for individuals with disabilities. Saturdays 12:30-2130 pm, Ott to March. Want to get wet?? Aquatic volunteers needed for men and women with disabilities. Will adapt to your schedule. Receive free pool pass.

Artists & Writers: The Waterloo Community Arts Centre needs you. Volunteers wanted to sit on programming committee, organize drop-in artist sessions, design posters and more. Cal I 886-4577 Wanted: Technical Director and Assistant Directorforthe FASS Theatre Co. Some experience recommended, fun required! We’re also looking for a Stage Manager, Music Director and Choreographer. Show runs first weekend in Feb. Applications due October 15. (519) 8844093, http://math.uwaterloo.ca/-fass/

Poker, euchre, crazy-eights?? Male volunteer sought for weekly card game. Gentlemen looking for card-buddy. Time/ location flexible. Learn about a different culture while you show a new immigrant how to be a part of our community. For more information , call the K-W YMCA Host Program at 579-9622. Make a difference in a child’s life! Friends, a service of Canadian Mental Health Association Waterloo Regional Branch, is seeking volunteers to support children one-to-one to develop their self esteem and social skills. Call 744-4806 ext. 335.

Office Assistants: answering all Home Support phone calls, typing and customer service in a busy office environment. You must have office experience, be able to type accurately and have good communication skills. Computer skills are an asset. One year commitment, Mondays from 1 to 4:30 p.m. Grocery Shoppers: assist older adults by purchasing and delivering groceries (max. once a week). Good organizational skills and reliable transportation are a must. Time commitment is flexible.

City of Waterloo Volunteer Services needs volunteers. Call 886-6488 for more info regarding the following positions; Transportation Scheduler: organize rides for older adults, taking requests for rides, then linking them to a volunteer driver. You must have excellent communication and telephone skills and have good knowledge of city streets. Time commitment is Tues., Wed., Thurs. or Fri. mornings

FRIDAY,

OCTOBER

Native Awareness Day, SLC Ii:00 am - 300 pm. Enjoy traditional drumming, dancing, more info contact

food, etc. For

c2brant @ cousteau.uwaterloo.ca. SATURDAY,

OCTOBER

Renison institute Ministry, ‘A Most Fulfilling Ministry The Faith Formation Team” sessions begin. call 884-4404 x628. MONDAY, Calvin

For more info

OCTOBER

Presbyterian

Church

248

Westmount Rd E. Kitchener. Donate blood for the Canadian Red Cross Society

130 - 8:00 pm

TUESDAY,

OCTOSER

Travel Talk - Australia and New Zealand on a budget presented by Travel Cuts. Taking place at 12:00 pm in the Davis Centre, Room 1302. WEDNESDAY,

Blood Donor Clinic, UW, Multi-Purpose Room, SLC from 12 noon to 4:30 p.m. All donors must bring I.D. FRIDAY, OCTOBER 25 The internationaiiy famous Tamburitzans of Duquesne University will appear at Humanities Theatre, University of Waterloo 8 8:W pm. AnimExpress Drawing Contest Draw your favourite anime character or design your own! Hand ill ustrations in to Candy Wong, wscwongQUtilI)rad.math*uwaterloo.w

Make illustrations on 8x11 sheet in either black/white or colour. Please include name and method of contact on back of illustration. For more info contact animexpress@calum.uwaterloo.ca SATURDAY,

Free admission! Gay and Lesbian

Mean to Me?” 7:30 pm. Social follows at 9 pm. HH 378 Meet old friends and make new ones. All welcome. Details: 884-4569.

OCTOBER

Liberation

of Wa-

terloo coming-out discussion group. Topic: “Relationships: What Do They

OCTOBER

Self Defense Workshop for women, Oct.26 & Nov. 2. Practical hands on training on effective techniques to stop any agressor. All ages welcome, please call 846-9532 for info.