said. “It seems that people have very concrete beliefs about names, believing your parents gave it to you and it would be a violation to change it, but it’s your name and your life.”
Chrys Tran
Chrys Tran’s name came from the nickname their late grandmother used to call them: “Chrysanthemum.” “My grandma actually gave me the name because she said, and I quote ‘Your given name is too white,’” Tran said. “It made me feel special, and I love that it’s gender-neutral.” When pronounced “Chris,” their name seems masculine but the “y in there adds femininity.” The change from their dead name to the name “Chrys” was a “natural next step when I realized I was nonbinary.” Although Tran loved their chosen name, they waited months to tell anyone at school. “I saw people coming out with their name on social media,” Tran said. “And I realized ‘Hey, people aren’t ridiculing them,’ and if they won’t get ridiculed, does that mean I won’t?” Still, Tran decided to “ease into” telling people their name, first telling their friends it was a nickname they wanted to go by and later telling their teachers about their name change. “It’s so fucked up that we try to make ourselves more palatable to others,” Tran
they introduce Tran to other people, they say that “Chrys” is a family nickname. “I remember when I was in the school play, and t h e y saw
that I was written down as. Chrys and they were like ‘Oh, your little nickname Chrys. You go by that at school too?’ with such a condescending tone,” Tran said. “That made me feel awful.” Tran also tried to make their pronouns more palatable to their followers on their social media account by choosing “they/she” in their pronouns section even though they hated the pronouns “she/her.” “I was like ‘Hey, you know what? I don’t want to blow their brains too much, so let me get a she/her in there to be nice,’” they said. “But now I’m like ‘Why am I sacrificing my comfort and literally my identity for strangers who I literally don’t care about?’” Tran said that all of their teachers have been supportive and willing to make
“It’s so fucked up that we try to make ourselves more palatable to others.” —Chrys Tran
said. “Like it hurts every time people say it’s just a nickname, but I said that too so that I wouldn’t get the heat.” When Tran came out to their conservative family members, they refused to use Tran’s chosen name. Instead, whenever 21 | In-depth
changes to their attendance sheets, popsicle sticks and tests. However, one particular teacher stands out to them: dance teacher Catherine Dietrich. “Most teachers pulled me aside and asked if I was going by a new name which is great, but Ms. Catherine was really the best,” they said. “On the first day, she took roll call by saying our last name and asking us to tell her our first name. That’s the first time I’ve ever heard of that, and it just warmed my heart. I almost cried.” Instances like these make Tran believe that the school environment is changing and getting better at “acknowledging the students’ identities.” They have hope that all teachers will implement practices like Dietrich’s to make students feel more comfortable. Porter, too, has hope that the students and staff are making strides to be more inclusive. “As I said, I didn’t have a good experience with the administrators at my school,” he said. “And I just hope we can be more open-minded and accepting of everyone that comes here.”
Junior Chrys Tran’s name change celebrates their “rebirth” and ever-evolving gender expression.
Beyond a Name
Lockwood hopes that despite his name change, people start to realize that there is more to him than his “dyed hair, piercings and weird outfits.” “I want people to know that I love animals and want to get a master’s degree in zoology,” Lockwood said. “My gender is weird and complicated, but I’m more complex than that. I’m more complex than my name.” For Lockwood, Porter and Tran, using their dead name feels like they are not being respected as a human being. “A dead name is the slur you hear the most often,” Tran said. “I just wish people would care more about the pain that name carries.”