Vortex of Insanity Anne Oftedahl Where do I start? I can’t start at the beginning, that’s too long ago… But I have to start somewhere. What was the beginning of everything? Someone, somewhere, had to start. What was the first word ever spoken? What language was that in? Does that language even exist anymore? Probably not… Maybe I could learn it? Yes, that’s something I should do. I think I’d be good at languages. I know some Spanish, and a bit of German. I even know a little bit of Latin. Latin would be really useful for exorcisms though, wouldn’t it? Oh, maybe I should become an exorcist? I’m sure there are demons hiding among us. There’s one in my bedroom. His name is George. Maybe that’s where I should start – with meeting George? I’m still not sure where he came from. One day, he was just there. The thing is, I don’t really like talking to strangers. Freaks me out. What do you even say to someone you don’t know? ‘Well, hello there, nice weather we’re having?’ They’d think I was insane! Well, they’d be right, but that’s beside the point. The point is this: I am losing my mind. Wait, that’s basically what I just said wasn’t the point. I mean, that just proves it though, doesn’t it? I am going mental. It started with George. Or maybe George just turned up when it started? I can’t tell the difference. George has been following me since I was 12. Another thing that’s been happening since I was 12 is that I see things that aren’t necessarily there. I think. I can’t tell the difference. My mum keeps saying that George isn’t there, but I know he is. He’s been there for ages. He’s always there. He’s there right now, crocheting a pair of bright pink horn-warmers. 63
VORTEX 2020