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Breadwinner wife ready to pack up, head out DEAR ANNK: I have been with my husband for seven years. When we first married, he had a great job and was attentive and supportive.
Annie's
~ I Mailbox
He adopted my son from my previous marriage, and I got pregnant shortly after our wedding. Life was wonderful, but it ended a month after our daughter was born. That was the first of several times that my husband was laid ofK In order to keep our health
with my kids. And I do this with no appreciationfrom my husband. He doesn't acknowledge me on holidays and skips our anniversary and my birthday. He cites his lack of income insurance, I was forced to return to for not getting me so much as a card work full time at a high-pressure job or making dinner. with long hours. I have developeda stress-related Two years ago, I told my husband illness, which is likely to get worse. that I could not take the stress any I have pleaded with my husband to longer, so he enrolled in a six-week take a second job or find something training program in another field. that pays better. He promises to look, Unfortunately, the Geld he selected but never does. Instead, he complains pays minimum wage with no chance to his mother and brother that Fm too of earning more. He now makes less demanding, and as a result, they hathan he did collecting unemployment. rass my son and me. They have never I am currently self-employed, with accepted him as part of their family. a highly successful business. I still I hate my life. I' ve told my husband work around the clock, pick my kids that I'm contemplating taking the up from school and then work into kids and moving back near my family, the evenings. I have zero quality time but he says I'm "running away" and
not giving him a chance. He says a second divorce would be detrimental to my son. How can I survive our marriage? This man is slowly killing me. — 24-HOUR WOMAN D EAR WOMAN: There a r e many marriages in which the wife is the main breadwinner and the husband takes care of the home and children. But it must be a mutual decision and accepted by both spouses. You are stressed to the breaking point. Your husband refuses to do anything to alleviate your stress, and worse, he allows (even encourages) his family to denigrate you and yourchild,which makes him anunsupportive partner, emotionally and fmancially. Unless you change this dynamic, he is perfectly content to let it continue. In many cases,a divorce isbetter for the kids than living in a miserable,unhappy environment with parents who argue
and don'trespect each other.Get counseling, with or without him, and figure out what is best for your family. DEAR ANNIE: I also say "amen" to 'Tired of the Gimme Generation." I have several grandchildren whom I love equally. When they were children, I treated them all the same with gifts and cards. But they are adults now.
When my birthday and special holidays come around, I receive well wishes from only one of my grandchildren. Consequently, she is the only one I acknowledge on her birthday and holidays. I have been accused of playing favorites, butI only travela two-way street. — JUDY IN INDIANA Annie'8 Mailbox is written by Kathy
Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@creators.corn, or u/ri te to: Annie'8 Mailbox, c I o Creators Syndicate, 787 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA
90254.
Nature is the source for many medicines DEAR DR ROACH:Are there any natural substitutes for blood thinners? Natural ingredients in aspirin work on some aspect of thinning the blood, perhaps for everyone taking them. It seems to me that testing natural substances would berelatively easy and cheap. G.T. ANSWER:The term "blood thinners" is a misnomer. Although blood viscosity can very occasionally be abnormally high, the anticoagulants (substances that reduce blood clotting) do not affect the thickness of the blood at all, but ratherwork againstthe platelets— circulating blood cells that start the clotting process — or the clotting factors, which are proteins made mostly in the liverthatmake am ature clot. -
For years, the dominant anticoagu-
To Your Good Health Keith Roach, M.D Similarly, on the dotting factor side, a veterinarian in Wisconsin figured out in the 19208 that the cows who had abnormal bleeding had eaten sweet clover, and researchers at the University of Wisconsin later identified dicoumarol in the clover as the substance that blocked production of clotting factors. This led to the development of warfarin (Coumadinl. Aspirin and warfarin are very inexpensivedrugs,and their newer,largely synthetic alternatives are many times more expensive but not necessarily better for everybody. Other sources of antic oagulants found in nature that might have promise in medicine include mosquito saliva,
lanton the plateletside has been aspirin. Extracts of willow bark, the source of salicylic acid, have been used for thousands of years. By modifying the natural compound, chemists were able to create a less-irritating and precisely dosed form of the extract. Hence, aspirin. since it contains a substance to prevent
clotting as well. In general, for centuries, the history of drug development in medicine has been to take natural products with known (or even suspected)properties,identify the active substances, then purify and test them for effectiveness. The list of successful drugs developed &om nature is enormous. Although there is the argument that some effectiveness is lost by purifying and standardizing only one component, the benefit of being able to precisel y dose the compound prevents overdoseofdrugswherethetoxicrange is near the therapeutic range. Taking digoxin is much safer than chewing foxgloveleaf,forexample. DEAR DR. ROACH: What is your opinion on baking soda? I hear it is an antacid, a neutralizer, a fungus killer,
it can prevent cancer and so on. This seems toogood tobetrue.Youropinion would be appreciated.— D.D. ANSWER: Baking soda, sodium bicarbonate, has many uses in the home and in medicine. It certainly is an antacid. The bicarbonate system is our
0!!OS CO!' Birthday for June 7.Talk about your loves this year. Express your passion and it grows. Lecture, write and participate in a wider conversation. Speak out. Your actions go far after 6/14. After 10/13, begin a new domestic phase. Community efforts take new shape after 10/27. Professional breakthroughs (3/8) and new love (3/23) arise next spring. Creativity flowers. To get the advantage, check the day's rating: 10 is the easiest day, 0 the most challenging. Aries (March 21-April 19):Today is a 7 — Peaceful productivity behind closed doors suits you fine. Don't bite offmore than you can chew. Compromise and schedule actions for later. Cleanse your system. Pay back a debt. Save morethan you need.Become more efficient. Taurus (April 20-May 20):Today is an 8 — Polite, respectful behavior takes less time than an outburst. Contain your feelings and sort them out later. Play nice. Learn from another's mistake. Check your work for changes. Friends are especially helpful. Listen more than speaking. Gemini (May 21 June 20):Today is a 9 — Focus on career over the next few days. Slow and easy does it. Expand your audience and your responsibilities. Consider all possibilities. Test it on your work group. Friends offer good advice. Avoid a fuss with clear communication. Cancer (June 21 July 22):Today is an 8 — Carefully arrange the itinerary. Tailor plan to fit the budget. Make sure everyone is ready. Partners have their own circumstances.Provide supportwhere needed. Have a plan and a back-up. You can have it all work out. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22):Today is an 8 — Keep to the plan. Logistics problems can be solved. Don't stir up jealousies or anxieties. Money talks. Find out what' s required. Get help from a strong partner. Monitor the numbers and adjust to suit. The story is still playing out. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):Today is a 9 — Create a new vision. Imagine how you would love it to be. Make a col-
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body'8primary bufFer system, the way we maintain pH at very precise levels despite wildly different food intakes. "Antacid"and "acid neutralizer"are different ways of saying the same thing. Baking soda neither prevents nor curescancer — that would be too good to be true. I had not heard that baking sodahas antifungalproperties,andwas surprised to find that at a concentrationof10 grams perliter (very roughly a tablespoon in a quart), a baking soda solution can inhibit fungus growth. This is partly why you can use baking soda and water to clean kitchen surfaces. Unfortunately, it lacks enough activity to be effective for clinical fungal infections. Dr. Roach regrets that he isunable to answer individual letters, but will incorporatethem in the column whenever possible. Readers may email questions
to ToYourGoodHealthomed.cornell.edu or request an order form of available health newsletters at PO. Box 586475,
Orlando, FL82853-6475.Health newslettersmay be ordered from www.rbma-
mall.corn.
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TOday m hlStOry Today is Saturday, June 6, the 157th day of 201 5. There are 208 days left in the year. Today's Highlight in History: On June 6, 1944, during World War II, the liberation of German-occupied western Europe began as Allied forces stormed the beaches of Normandy, France, on "D-Day." On this date: In 1939, the first Little League game was played as Lundy Lumber defeated Lycoming Dairy 23-8 in Williamsport, Pennsylvania. In 1955, the U.S. Post Office introduced regular certified mail service. In 1965, the Rolling Stones single "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction" was released in the United States by London Records, the same day Herman's Hermits performed their latest hit, "I'm Henry VIII, I Am" on "The Ed Sullivan Show" on CBS-TV. In 1966, black activist James Meredith was shot and wounded as he walked along a Mississippi highway to encourage black voter registration. In 1968, Sen. Robert F. Kennedy died at Good Samaritan Hospital in Los Angeles, a day after he was shot by Sirhan Bishara Sirhan. In 1978, California voters overwhelmingly approved Proposition 13, a primary ballot initiative calling for major cuts in property taxes. In 1984, government forces in India stormed the Golden Temple in Amritsar in an effort to crush Sikh extremists; at least 1,000 Sikhs and 200 soldiers were killed. In 1985, authorities in Brazil exhumed a body later identified as the remains of Dr. Josef Mengele, the notorious "Angel of Death" of the Nazi Holocaust. In 1994, President Bill Clinton joined leaders from America' s World War II allies to mark the 50th anniversary of the D-Day invasion of Normandy. A China Northwest Airlines passenger jet crashed near Xian (SH EE'ahn), killing all 160 people on board.
IIQ!s lage.Find friends who have what you want and ask how they got it. Apply discipline. Learn what you need. Revise strategy. Play. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):Today is a 9 — For the next two days, fulfill promises you' ve made. Your workload could get intense. Profit from meticulous service. The details are important. Don't touch your savings. You can find necessary resources. Shop carefully. Balance chaos with tranquility. Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):Today is a 9 — Be diplomatic. You' re especially attractive. Your work is in demand. Creative planning resolves a practical issue. Invest in your career. Your fame is spreading. Share the wealth by delegating jobs. Grow savings. Relax with someone fun. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):Today is an 8 — Get fully into a household project over the next few days. Less is better. Clear out unused stuff. Give it away or sell it. Balance colors, form and lighting. Spend a little to save a lot. Capricorn (Dec. 22 Jan. 19):Today is an 8 — Keep researching. Make plans and organize the pieces. Review all options before choosing. Walk and talk with a partner. Learn from a good teacher. Look to what worked in the past. Adapt. Consider consequences before hitting "send." Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):Today is a 9 — There' s profitable work available. Get what you need delivered, and push while the getting is good. Balance accounts and replenish reserves. Keep momentum. Stick to the budget. Focus on the job, and celebrate later. You have what others want. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20):Today is an 8 — Accept a challenge if it pays well. Assertiveness works now. Ask for what you want with confidence. Conserve resources. Love flows in abundance. Listen to your critics to grow faster. Invest in business efficiency. Creative efforts bear fruit.
Near the end, playfor endplay By PHILLIP ALDER
06-06-15 North 4 AK Y A Q1073 2 t Q 10
+AJ9 Nora Ephron, an author and a screenwriter East who died in 2012, said, "I always read the last 4853 2 pageofa bookfirstsothatifl die before l fin0 Q J 10 9 ish, I' ll know how it turned out." 06 V4 That is depressing, but at the bridge table, it $ K 9 5 4 I 87 63 2 is excellent if, from trick one, you can envi4? 5 4 sion how the deal will end up in your favor. South This week, we have looked at a slightly more 4 764 advanced topic: elimination and endplay. In T KJ 9 8 5 our final example, how should South play in I AJ six hearts after West leads the spade queen to 4 K108 dummy's king? North's sequence was a tad unscientific, Dealer: South especially as it was not certain that South had Vulnerable: Both a high diamond. But it kept the defenders in the dark. South has two possible losers, one in each 51 Pass 5 N T Pas s minor. And someone who does not know 6 Y Pass P a s s Pa s s about endplays would try first the diamond finesse, then, when it lost, hope to find the club queen. However, the contract is a certainty. Openinglead:4 Q Declarer draws the missing trumps, cashes dummy's spadeace,leads the diamond queen (to tempt East to cover with the king if he has it), wins with his ace, ruffs his last spade, and casts adrift with dummy's diamond 10. Note that declarer has drawn trumps, but has at least one left in each hand to benefit from a ruff-and-sluff, he has eliminated two side suits, and has lost the lead. Whichever defender wins with the diamond king is endplayed. He must either lead a club, which finds the queen for South, or play a spade or diamond, which concedes a ruffand-sluff. Declarer ruffs in one hand and sluffs a club from the other.