out to each other. Later that evening, she turned to me and said, “I feel free.” Finally being open about my sexuality was liberating for me, too. So why bother coming out? I could easily hide this since I am attracted to cisgender women too. I decided to be open about it because of how few openly trans-attracted people there are in the world and how this silence contributes to stigma about trans-people and sexuality. Although transattraction is hardly a rare phenomenon, it remains hidden because almost all trans-attracted men are in the closet. As a result, the common assumption is that men who date trans-women are desperate and simply “put up with” the fact that the woman is trans. The truth is that we are not just okay with it; we are just as attracted to trans-women as we are to cis-women, regardless of their biological sex. In September 2013, DJ Mister Cee, a prominent figure in the hip-hop community, was “caught” with a transgender woman. After being outed and admitting to being attracted to trans-women, he was so ashamed that he resigned from his job at the radio station Hot 97. His trans-attraction was turned into a scandal. The only thing
that should be considered scandalous is the fact that he had to hide his attraction in the first place. I want to be open about my sexuality because I have had enough of this shaming of trans-attracted men and the damage this does to trans-women. It has created a disgusting culture of transattracted men using trans-women for sex, but never forming a committed relationship with them. Most trans-attracted men are only trans-attracted at night. Then during the day they run back to their heteronormative relationships with the cis-women of whom they are not ashamed. Even men who are in committed relationships with trans-women will often tell those women that they could never introduce them to their friends or family. Imagine a woman that has been to hell and back trying to transition into who she really is only to be told by her lover that he is ashamed to be with her. The hardship that trans-attracted men go through does not even come close to what transwomen have to go through in their day-to-day lives. That is why it is so important for trans-attracted men to start coming out of the closet. Personally, I am proud to be attracted to women who are so strong.
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Moxie Project the
The Moxie Project is a collaboration between the Carolina Women’s Center, the Southern Oral History Program, the History Department, and the Office of the Provost. The Moxie Project is a combined academic and community engagement project that aims to place UNC students who have completed coursework in women’s activism with community organizations for summer internships to help them develop their own sense of activism and community engagement. In additional to an internship project, students will gain training in oral history will collect a series of oral histories about the creation and early work of local organizations in order to inform the Southern Oral History Program’s work on women’s movement in the south.
for more info, visit
womenscenter.unc.edu/moxie
Organized by: Students United for Reproductive Justice