Sound ofMusic was one time too many. I don't have any patience j ulie Andrews trying to be a mm, traipsing around in all this
"'~th
pretty scenery like an ad for mentJ1ol cigarettes. I wasn't just picking on The Sound ofMusic, either. Titc whole point I was trying to get across to Leon is how mo,~es always come off phony when they're about real people. If you ask me to watch somebody like, say, Mia Farrow in a mm~e they made up from scratch, I can do it. Someiliing about iliat one botl1ers me, but I can put up with her. If she's going to try to do Joan of Arc, though, count me out. They can burn her without me. I don' t care who it is tl1ey're trying to do, Napolean or Eleanor Roosevelt, it al"vays puts me in mind of a btmch of little kids dressed up for H alloween. They even had one on TV where iliis guy who's tl1e spitting image of the butcher over at Avenue Foods talked exactly like J ohn Kennedy. You d on' t want to get me going on movies about j esus. Anything is ea<;ier ior me to take tl1a11 that, even if il's Ruth Ford playing an old potty mouth. Anyway, I'm ex'J)Iaining all this to Leon, just like I'm explaining it to you, and I seem to be making some headway, when all of a sudden Claire - that's his sister - puts in her two cents a11d starts taking Leon's side. I'll give you an idea what lktl one is like. One time Claire said to me- herwords - "in our day and age, masculinity has been redefined." My definition of masculinity is still the san1e as it always was, thank you, <md if you want my opinion, I tl1ink Claire married herself a fmiL Anyway, there I an1 talking to Leon and Claire butts in to tell me I have pecttlia~路 taste anyway, and then Leon chimes in to say I always had peculiar taste, even when I was a kid. You don't talk to me tl1at w-ay. I said, "To the likes of you two, ar1ything that isn' t nat-assed d tm1b is peculiar, just like it was with Aunt Paula." That's their motl1er and I don't care whether she rests in peace or not. One 88
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