TRINITY NEWS
P14
Hilary term, Week 6
InProfile People say...
Corey Delaney, surrounded by friends and fellow party goers displays just one of the newspapers that covered his now famous house party. Photo: AP
YouTube and wild party create legend Emily Monk profiles notorious party-boy Corey Delaney
H
e is sixteen years old and famous for organising “the best party ever” at his parent’s home in Narre Warren, just outside Melbourne, Australia. Corey Delaney, (born Corey Worthington), has gained international notoriety for advertising a “free house party” on myspace.com and causing AU$20,000 (€12,500) of damage, whilst his oblivious parents were holidaying on the Gold Coast. But it is his lack of remorse and self-proclaimed “attitude” in the subsequent weeks that has caused such disdain from critics and onlookers. On 12 January 2008, more than 500 “alcohol-fuelled” teenage revellers attended, partaking in “acts of debauchery” such as “semi-naked twister”. It is reported that when police initially turned up they were “driven away” by the “rebels” and consequently sent for back-up. Eventually 30 police officers arrived at the scene, including a helicopter and dog-squad. According to the BBC, the police were attacked with “bottles and stones” and many of the neighbours were “terrified”. When Delaney’s parents were informed, they were understandably furious, but his mother’s only response was, “we’re a good family…”.
Perhaps predictably, Delaney went “missing” soon after the incident, in order to avoid the inevitable wrath from neighbours and “livid” parents. A Current Affair, the Australian news programme, caught up with him for a live three-minute interview. Standing nonchalantly with an open fur-lined jacket, demonstrating a nipple piercing and bare torso, Delaney refused to take off his oversized yellow sunglasses when making his “official” apology to the neighbourhood and police of Narre Warren. When asked why he would not remove the comic specs, he mumbled that “they’re famous”. In a hope to prompt some repentance, the appalled presenter then asked the question, “What advice would you give other teenagers planning to have a party when their parents are away?” Delaney’s casual reply is “Get me to do it for you…yeah.” Resulting from his now infamous reputation as a “party boy”,Delaney has assigned himself to one of Australia’s leading celebrity agents and is soon to embark on a “world-tour” of party organising and promoting whilst in training to be a DJ. There’s nothing like using notoriety and ill-repute to lucrative effect… Just a couple of months ago, he
E Evelyn Tent Send all your gossip to evelyn.tent@trinitynews.ie
was starting an apprenticeship as a carpenter, having recently left school. When asked how he feels, now the commotion is waning, Delaney, still sporting his “trademark faux-fur jacket”, says that “A week ago, I was on the building site working hard and now they put me on a national tour… life’s good.” His parents are supposedly supporting, (after some persuasion), his latest career plan and have even met with “the agent” – Max Markson. Who wouldn’t be content when his annual earnings are expected to exceed AU$100,000? But what is most astounding about the whole debacle is the amount of press coverage and web space the affair has incited. There are endless groups on chatrooms and social-networking sites, solely dedicated to discussions about the teenage “legend” slash “arrogant twat”, not to mention the pages printed in every national newspaper the world over. From what I can gather, support is rather outweighed by disparage. On Facebook, for example, there are 216 groups devoted to this sixteen-year old’s namesake, three quarters of which offer derogatory comments. One only needs to type his name into youtube.com to be inundated with, often hilarious videos and spin-offs. Markson however, thinks that
As my dear friend Emily Dickinson said “truth is such a rare thing, it is delightful to tell it”. Evelyn, of course, relishes the truth. I simply cannot but indulge in it. Many don’t seem to appreciate my nuggets of wisdom; in fact, some get quite annoyed when they read what I write. Some bluster about campus, some complain to the authorities and if you’re the authorities, you have a meeting to discuss my good self. How proud a day it was when Evelyn got a call to say that she was indeed the topic of conversation at a meeting of the most senior College figures. Darlings, please… I’m blushing. And I’m delighted that you’re such fans. Speaking of truth, will we ever find out how that fire stated in the Hamilton? Was it those heroin addicts shooting up in the toilets or was it the cruisers trying something new fetish with candles; or maybe it was College Security finally burning all those cardboard cut-outs of the Provost we’ve all seen photgraphed in newspapers? Carly Simon said it best when she said, “You’re so vain, you probably think this song is about you” and it seems one person thinks so many of my “songs” are about him. This week, he has been attempting to woo a disinterested Law Soc girl and featured on RTÉ’s “I Dare Ya…”, after daring the comedians to not come to this college. Oh, what a terribly boring boy he is. The fine comedian Andrew Maxwell also paid a visit to Trinity last
Delaney, “the most famous and popular sixteen year old in Australia”, will have the last laugh. The well-known agent concedes that the “party scene” is not perhaps a long-term proposition. Delaney himself says that, “Once this is all finished, I’ll go and get a job” and Markson responds with “I think any family would love to have a sixteenyear-old like that”. Possibly. Some members of the Irish media have drawn comparisons between Delaney and the “reprobates” in Trinity Hall who were responsible for organising a stripper to attend a birthday party. (Reported in Trinity News at the beginning of term and the Irish Independent on 25 January). Both incidents were described as “out of control” and both claimed to be the result of “excessive intake of alcohol” by “young revellers.” Possibly justly, Delaney has received more scorn than the Freshers in Halls, although understandably, neither incident was appreciated by those in authority. He is yet to move back in with his parents, having received death threats and more than 700,000 people have given him a “virtual slap”. Some of the (astonishing amount) of opinions voiced on the web are printed to the left.
week and really did get down and dirty with the students. The beautiful “married with children” Mr. Maxwell spent quite some time down in the tunnels of Trinity. Oh, those boys in the Comedy Soc and Ents crew do know how to entertain. In House 6 the imminent publication of the annual Power List has made leading lights get quite paranoid. One member of the Students’ Union told Evelyn that “if another sabbat gets ahead of me, I’ll fucking kill them”, while a member of CSC has been declaring loudly, “I’m far more powerful than the SU”. The self-same CSC ninny told Evelyn the secret of that august body’s success in College: “Well I think we are the most successful because every other capitated body has somebody working against them – us!” But one does wonder if they, or any other Exec members, really do know what real CSC policy is. It seems Der Führer has been keeping everyone on his delegations mum at recent meetings – could you find record of a CSC student delegate having spoken at any recent Capitations meeting? When one minion was asked if that was the case, the minion replied “oh, no”. When asked if he would question what Der Führer had declared CSC policy, he said, “oh, it would be quite inappropriate”. Democracy at work darlings. Evelyn also wonders how inappropriate it would be for a senior College official to insure their Trinity pension scheme against collapse? Is there something wrong with the scheme that
“I wish there were more young people like this instead of the many spineless little fakers there are out there. Corey Delaney is much like a young Frankie Wilde staring in It’s All Gone Pete Tong: The Prequel. Of course Corey now has an agent and throws parties for cash. It’s refreshing to know that at least someone out there gets to live the dream” chantillybass.blogspot.com Good on him, I can remember having parties at my parents’ house and it was easy for them to get out of control. All of these old funny duddies have either never had enough friends to hold a good party or have forgotten what it’s like to be sixteen and have some fun. Personally I would be worried if my three children didn’t have any secret parties in their teenage years - true, I wouldn’t be too chuffed with a huge bill such as this lad’s family did but, what the hell, you only get one life - LIVE IT! Sarah Handley, Thailand This is just an ordinary teenager whose party got out of hand. It is not an extraordinary occurrence, although providing grist for the news mill. William, Padstow, Australia Who was admiring this moron, definitely not the majority of people in Oz. If you are so keen on him then let him move to live with you and organise any parties he wants in your home!!!! Liz Scott, Adelaide, SA The world has gone totally mad. This moron with his so-called friends caused havoc and we seem to welcome this? And he is going to earn some serious cash! Surely this is only an invitation for other kids to go one better, it is like extreme partying. Who can cause the most havoc? I have a solution: round them up, create a battalion, train them and ship them to Iraq or Afghanistan, where I am sure they will be welcomed with open arms. Or if the prefer it I am sure that comarade Putin has some space in that land east of Moscow, where they can get rid of all this energy. MAD just MAD Loris, Milan, Italy Yet this kind of person appeals to todays youth, what a sad state of affairs. He should have been arrested, What an embarresment to Australia. Karl, Brisbane, Australia
they help to administer? Do they know this, and is that why they talked to the good people in Lloyds about getting a hefty payoff if the scheme goes belly up? Well, I suppose they are of age and retirement isn’t far off. As for the privileges staff enjoy, the Junior Dean and Joe O’Gorman of CSC have been enjoying the benefits of hot showers while all the poor students living in the Rubrics have been told they’d have to trek down to the gym if they would like to indulge themselves underneath a showerhead. One rule for the powerful and another for the likes of ex-Phil wildboy Barry Keane, who now resides above the Junior Dean. There’ll be no parties this year and one hopes he won’t take issue with another car mirror like he did last year; Emma’s beautiful red mini is parked right outside his door. He-who-shall-not-be-named and “Boobs” Faller were hauled up to the Provost’s Board Room last week. Evelyn gleefully thought the two were due for a good spanking, but apparently not. Members of the Communications Office, Enquries, Security, the CSC, the Junior Dean and others were present, but no lashings were meted out. Perhaps the pen pushers just had a free afternoon and wanted the free coffee and biscuits, but Evelyn thinks something was amiss. Why were no minutes taken, darlings? But it seems they did achieve one thing: a promise from He-who-shall-notbe-named that his society would agree in writing to never invite a controversial speaker to Trinity. That could make for
quite the dull few years ahead. “Boobs” made no such promises. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad for the inaugural Evelyn says! The beloved Students’ Union Electoral Commission is busying itself making up nicknames this week. Well, this is their one moment of glory what with the elections looming. Apparently this year Cathal Horan, the chair, is “The Voice”, Nikolai’s “The Brawn”, Shane O’Brien is “The Brains” (god help them), Anni Dai is “The Beauty” (very true), Eoin Dornan is “The Comic Relief” and Ray Healy “The Gentlemen”. How sweet. Finally, Evelyn always likes to leave you wondering so I thought I might pose a few questions before I go – answers as always on the back of a postcard. Which engineer was seen recently on a mid-afternoon walk across Front Square in nothing but his dressing gown? Which student was caught by the Gardaí “caressing” a homeless person outside the Palace? Which society figure’s name features most prominently in the ladies toilets? And finally, which member of College staff recently advertised their availability of their office for sex in Trinity? Do you know? I do. Until next time darlings,
E.T.
opinionandanalysis@trinitynews.ie