someone can hardly be compared to lying about an affair.) Lest this stance on sin sound too harsh or non-forgiving, listen to the way that David put it in Psalm 101:2 …I will walk in my house with blameless heart. As David implies in this psalm, character begins with yourself. He decided to avoid: • • • • • • • •
you value for your dating life. Ultimately, you will get what you value. Value good things, and say no to things that destroy. T Taken from Boundaries in Dating by DR HENRY CLOUD. Copyright. Used by permission of Zondervan. WWW. ZONDERVAN.COM
Vile things Faithlessness Perversity Evil Slander Pride and haughtiness Deceit Wickedness
What an incredible list of character traits to avoid! So many heartaches would be avoided if people would say no to dating someone who showed the above character.
Because of the very nature of human beings, relationships will be imperfect. You are always going to be dating someone with flaws. But, remember, there are flaws that you can live with, and those you can’t. The ones that you can live with can teach you a lot about patience and acceptance, as well as intimacy and working through conflict. But serious character flaws can destroy and injure you. The best test is God’s Word, and how your own heart feels as you are in a relationship with a person. If you are dealing with a person who injures you, leaves you feeling bad about yourself and love, and hurts you in other ways, you are dealing with things that you should not be allowing. The best test is always your experience of the person. If you are feeling a lot of bad things as a result of being with this person, let that be a sign. The relationship will not get better on its own. Do what you have to do to stop the destruction. Protect yourself by knowing what you feel and value, and have the courage to stick to what
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Trinitarian Magazine Issue 4/2011