Essential Notes from an Afro-Genderqueer by Toi S.

ESSENTIAL NOTES FROM AN

PHILOSOPHACTIVIST

Toi

Table of Contents

Not interested in sitting at your table OR No, thank you to your "table" ....................................... 3 Poem: Post-Racial Who? ................................................................................................................ 7 Food. Justice. Part 1: The Color of Food Justice ............................................................................ 12 Food Justice Part 2: Queering Food Justice ................................................................................... 15 Shades of Masculinity: On Masculinity, Strength, Perceptions of Power and Desirability ........... 18 Decolonizing Gender in Our QPOC/POC Community- Reclaiming Oldways Starting with Concepts of Gender....................................................................................................................................... 22 Why the world needs more QPOC/POC herbalists and healers.................................................... 28 Countering Racism and Oppression in Holistic Healing ................................................................ 32

Well hello, hello… I’m thinking you probably saw my book on some radical, anarchist or feminist bookstore shelf or borrowed it from some dope queer/person of color or ally. Thanks for that. Writing has always been a form of healing for me and it is really inspiring to know that somewhere out there someone is being affected by these words. As a person who struggled to be heard for a lot of my life, this is quite the change of circumstances for me. It’s something a person could get used to, you knowbeing listened to. I hope that this writing will inspire you to go out and tell your story and give your analysis on the day to day goings-on in your communities. My writing process: it starts out as this urge to be heard this itch you can't scratch and then you start to write it all down...and you can breeeathe again and you get used to it...hooked

Please enjoy and feel free to email me at gqstreetpoet@gmail.com or check out my website: www.afrogenderqueer.com . I’d love to hear from you.

Toi -AKAAGQ

Not interested in sitting at your table OR No, thank you to your "table" We've all heard of the table that's sitting and waiting for us people of color to join. It's had place mats and a glass of water, and maybe even a (culturally irrelevant) salad and appetizer waiting for us for some time some say. Those in lucrative positions and positions of power and privilege keep telling us that they want us to take a load off, break bread with them and let them know what's on our community's mind. They are all ears. We NEED to be at this table that they've created. This table with the nice linens of conveniently, already-made ideology, the polished silverware of entrenched models and old paradigms, the rolled napkins of (pseudo-) peace talks and (our) compromise. You see, a lot of the folks I know don't want a seat at someone else's table. The very table that is built on assumptions that the marginalized must be taught, can't organize themselves, and need only buy into pre-made models. Na, no thanks. We want our own table *and not the kiddie table, thanks. Maybe some liberals and progressives have missed this in fighting for their own autonomy but yes...we'd like our own autonomy. Our own sovereignty (which Merriam-Webster defines as freedom of external control). We don't just want to be heard on the fringes of your agendas. We don't just want to be heard when something we say complements your agenda. We have had our own ideas on how things should be in our communities since the beginning of time...and it wasn't until our communities were disrupted that we started to have these huge disparities. Being pushed into survival mode, priorities were shifted...but not to the point that we'd like to give up control of what happens to us, our families and communities to outliers who don't know much about our values or needs. Envisioning and creating a shift in paradigm We need a completely new paradigm, not the old, musty models and mentality rooted in wayward assumptions and savior mentality. For those who aren't sure what savior mentality looks like..it goes a little something like this... 3

"Why won't they just come to the table. They never show up. We're trying to help them but they don't want to be helped!" "We just want to help you/your people/those people/the at-risk/minorities..." "They just don't want/won't to do the work..." "They just don't understand. We have to teach them all about how to...x,y,z"

Assumptions make an… Here's a big issue: subconsciously some white activists and radicals operate under the same erroneous assumptions that our country was built on: that we’re not quite people. We're not whole and therefore to be infantalized. We’re folks to be taught the proper way to go about things: health, education, religion,etc. We need their help…but in the ways they want to give it. If you want to help...help us to make these important decisions that have major impact on our community within our community. Don't just expect us to come and get cozy in the seat at your table. Odds are we have a different perspective on how we want to go about food and economic justice. And no matter what anyone thinks, it's not our job to fill that seat at your table. You should come sit at ours. And don't say there isn't one- you probably haven't looked hard enough what with all the projects that are being started assuming that there aren't others out there like yours. And yes, we know, it makes you feel all kinds of uncomfortable to sit at our table. But we've been feeling that way for decades at that rickety, folding chair at your table. That's why a lot of us refuse to join your dinner party anymore. Trust us, it's for the best. It's hard to sit at a table where racist, xenophobic, and patriarchal assumptions aren't checked. Microaggressions- you really feel those in the morning (and weeks and weeks) after those meetings. Privilege, Privilege, Privilege It's probably no news to many that organizing tactics are affected by class and race privilege. Radicals frequently talk about these but, in my experience,I've seen few really, truly addressing them. It's always easier to talk about things, 4

right? Or maybe to turn the issue around and say that POC should give the solution to solving this problem (which unfortunately is tied to racist assumptions of what POC should be responsible for). Tables are tokenizing And few appreciate being tokenized. This looks like: Deciding you need a black or brown person on you panel or board or in your collective to represent/speak for the black/brown community. Making the black/brown person the go to person for questions about the black/brown community Thinking that having the black/brown person say a few things in a few meetings throughout the year is enough to understand the black/brown community Thinking that sending the black/brown person to meetings with other black/brown folks and having them report back is enough or is "keeping your ear to the ground" So again...

Meet us at our table Where we rarely have a token white person but usually respect our allies if they're willing to put in the work, check their assumptions, and acknowledge that "cultural competence" and "anti-racism" are not skills that can be mastered. Meet us at our table where we make our own decisions and come up with our own solutions within our communities- because nobody knows what is best for our community but us. And nobody knows our community needs like we do. Period. I don’t care what school you went to, what kind of degree you've received, what kind of organizing you’ve done in the states abroad, or what kind of theory you’ve read…the Community. Knows. Best. So come join us at our table where I can almost for certain say that we've been discussing issues of social justice since they were 5

issues- even if we didn't have fancy labels for these issues. (This is a hint for you "food movement"). Join us...we'll share a pot of greens or some arroz con pollo or somethin' with you... Yea, we'll make you a plate... [to definitely be continued]

-AGQ www.afrogenderqueer.com

Post-Racial Who? What can I saysometimes I feel down being brown in this supposedly god fearing town nobody ever gave me the lowdown that no matter how much education and experience I accumulate I'll get shot down In the 2 minutes before the interview even starts Doesn't matter the size of my portfolio how packed and pretty the resume doesn't matter if I'm extremely smart Cuz though I can change my clothes and walk the walk fortunately but unfortunately this brown does not come off I can- change my ethnocentric name to play the game but dreads, braids no sirthe white managers will all confer and concur that I'm not a â&#x20AC;&#x153;good cultural fitâ&#x20AC;? see, too much culture 7

gives the vultures ulcers and frankly I'm tired of it-

Tired of working 5 times as hard only to be the first to be scarred Marred by the rampant racism cataclysm between brown and white The overseer never died he just changed face, still subjected and subjugated to micromanaging oversight because of my race I'm battling perceptions pre-dating my birth There's a whole society out there who claims to already know my price tag, my worth And being queer is only the icing on the cake, because institutions go out of their way to pay us less tell us to give them even more as they take, take, take I'm brown so I deserve less It's expected that I will live a life of 8

stress expected to supress not express invisible tattoo on my chest My back's a bridge I'm paid a smidge And people may say we're in a post-racial society but clearly they don't peep the vestige of 400+ years of captivity and 60 years of feigned freedom excuse me for my negativity but it's hard to smile when all the while the white man's foot is on my neck and I can't get an ounce of respect and don't even have time to reflect and time is a resource that I'm afraid I can't cover with my miniscule or nonexistent check No we can't afford to leave work early go in late grassroots organize while our kids sit at home with empty stomachs and plates We have other priorities9

That will not be met With unemployment because of Discrimination Condemnation Segregation Homophobia Xenophobia Degradation and a whole list of -Isms is it these isms that got young brothers not driven opportunities not given silent doors no knocks but next door chicken joints and shops that sell glocks easier to get and kill two for the price of one yet white people swear to me that racism is steadily being undone this whole talkinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; out the side of their face while getting a facial that this society is post-racial that it doesn't dictate how I talk where I walk where's available to shop

their stealth stares my health care If I'll ever be Chair if I can make it There If this society is so 10

interstitial and the power is flowin' equally from individual to individual Can all I just said be superficial? If so, here: sign over your first born signature and initials.

Food. Justice. Part 1: The Color of Food Justice

People's Grocery- West Oakland, CA

Working as a food justice organizer, one of the first actions I took was to scour the internet, libraries, bookstores and organizations for faces like mine. I knew there had to be brown faces in the food justice movement somewhere and it was vital to my survival as a person dedicated to food, health, and economic justice to find people of color who “got” it. Folks who didn't overuse “vote with your fork” and think that everyone has “time” and resources. Folks who saw the reality and spoke to systemic issues that made it all the more difficult to be “green” and “sustainable” and a “locavore.”

Which systemic issues, you ask? Not having enough money for some organic food. Not having access to healthy foods because you live in a neighborhood with only convenience stores and fast food restaurants and no grocery stores. Not having a backyard to grow food in or a community garden in your neighborhood. Not having time to buy and cook healthy food let alone grow your own food. Not being told that your ancestors diet was healthy and not being told the truth behind our behaviors today and the way that capitalism has bred our

community's sickness and contributed to an obscene amount of preventable deaths....genocide.

The narrative that we frequently hear obviously comes from mostly privileged white folks who seem to omit race and class from their conversations. It's convenient and comfortable for them. All the work our ancestors did devoid of labels such as “local” and “organic” seems to also get left behind. Which predecessors? Great black agriculturalists such as George Washington Carver who may have been one of the first to have been concerned with sustainable agriculture. Great brown farmers and activists like Cesar Chavez who saw firsthand the toxic effects of what was being put on the crops farmworkers harvested (and continue to harvest).

In the dominant narrative it seems like black and brown folks are ignorant about health and healthy food. Perhaps we're “too lazy” to start a garden and grow our own food. We don't want to just spend the extra money on the “front end” instead of on hospital bills due to our eating “habits” on the back end. It seems much easier for food activists to focus on our behaviors and glaze over issues of time and employment (working two and three jobs), space (maybe we don't own land or don't have access to community gardens or live in food deserts full of fast food restaurants and corner stores with unfresh and processed foods). There's an overall assumption that we just don't want to be healthy and that we don't care about our family's health. Very little is said about discrimination within the health care system, decreased access to health care, limited access to healthy foods and land, and other issues that communities of color haven't had a lot of control over.

It's easier to play the blame game. It's easier not to check detrimental and erroneous assumptions and to be guided by stereotypes and biases. It's easier to be exclusive and not include brown folks into the food movement. Race talk just ruins things. There are tokens to report back about what's going on in the community. Even though the reports aren't needed because it's all the

community's fault. Obviously they like to eat that food, live that way. Quick get together a brigade to get them all to Vote with their Fork... even if they can't afford one.

Food Justice Part 2: Queering Food Justice If you’re a person of color with a low income it’s important for you to know that conversations about your ability to access foods, yes, conversations about your very well-being are happening behind your back. Even if you make a living wage, you might want to know that here in Austin (and in many other metropolitan and even rural cities), policy affecting your community’s food sovereignty is being shaped largely without your input or consent. Basically, our community , considered the “target population” of many mainstream “food movement” efforts has had little say in if we’d like farmer’s markets, supermarkets, community gardens and access to the knowledge and skills that will help us sustain ourselves. I’m not saying we’ve never been asked. I’m saying that it’s rare. There are a lot of “allies” who tend to want to take the lead in this movement. They think they have the solutions and know what we want and need. The problem with this isthe food movement operates under a few hurtful assumptions. Some are completely detrimental to the way we view ourselves as a community and as a People. Some are damaging to how we see our identity. So why is this important to us as QPOC? Because a large percentage of us have a lower socioeconomic status and are therefore more likely to be food insecure. Where we sit at the intersections of race, gender, class and sexuality makes us highly vulnerable and subject to the policing of our food and economic system. Our lack of resources, especially TIME, allows for outsiders (and sometimes even well-meaning allies) to come in and make decisions FOR us- maybe even AS usbased on their assumptions and their own personal beliefs about what will make our community better. Many of these solutions are not culturally appropriate or relevant. Since colonization those in power have been operating under a “one size fits all” model complete with assumed assimilation. We are being recolonized. It’s hard to stay on top of decolonizing the various systems that wreak havoc on our communities. How are we supposed to do this when we’re barely surviving? We have to get back to the old ways- the ways of our ancestors. We have to 15

support each other in ways that are sustainable to our own families and communities. It’s time to get back to community kitchens where neighborhoods come together and cook for/eat with each other. It’s time to pay ourselves for growing our own food. It’s time to establish our own black and brown-owned cooperatives where we decide what goods belong in those stores while creating our own jobs and opportunities. No, this isn’t new- it was taken from us. Then denied and withheld from us. In the colonizer’s model and their capitalism we POC are to continue to have less and less resources yet devote more and more time to supporting these very broken systems that don’t benefit us. All the while we assimilate, losing ties to our cultures while decimating the environment and surrendering our emotional, social and spiritual well-being.

So how do we resist? No..how do we do *more than resist?

Depending on our skills and resources- this may look like you as a single parent feeding healthy food to your children. Yes, this is radical! This may look like participating in healthy potlucks with a group of friends. It’s bartering your services. It’s establishing collectives and co-operatives and therefore creating an alternative economy in which money continues to circulate within our community. It’s demanding policy change that deters development that displaces our community and exacerbates food deserts. It’s demanding fair wages and supporting black and brown business owners. There are so many ways we can resist and co-create change. Transformation is occurring as you read this. The revolution is already under way. There are people like Toni Tipton-Martin, founding member of Foodways Texas and author of The Jemima Code, who are committed to reclaiming our foodways and celebrating our cultural and culinary heritage. There are organizations like Food for Black Thought who are committed to supporting local grassroots efforts in black and brown communities in organizing around food related issues in East Austin. There are also alliances forming in East Austin and in Dove Springs to cocreate solutions for the lack of access to healthy and affordable foods. 16

There are also efforts happening across the nation. (And across the world for that matter). Check out efforts in the East Bay like People's Grocery, the Mandela Food Cooperative, Phat Beets Produce, the Oakland Food Connection. There are efforts in Detroit like the Black Community Food Security Network, D-town Farms, and the Ujamaa cooperative food buying club. Will Allen's Growing Power, Inc. urban farms are located in Madison, Milwaukee, and Chicago. In NYC there are Just Food, Farming Concrete, La Familia Verde Garden Coalition, and Black Urban Growers. These are just a small number of the community efforts for food justice led by people of color. As QPOC living at the intersections we should be aware of what is happening to address access to food because issues of food insecurity affect everyone, whether we want to believe it or not. What can we do as a community to assist in the transformation of our food system? What can we do as a community to better our economic situation? Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s share some food and exchange some dialogue. We already have the answers.

Shades of Masculinity: On Masculinity, Strength, Perceptions of Power and Desirability

What does strength look like to you? Many are caught up in the ways that we've been socialized to believe what strength looks like, especially as it pertains to masculine presenting folks. A lot of times I see “strength” being tied to the performance of male roles and traits...especially aggression, cockiness, etc. I see it tied to a specific kind of power that has been relegated to males and that is connected to the outward expression of dominance in all its ways of being portrayed.

Inner strength is often overlooked. A masculine of center person with an enormous reserve of inner strength who is “holding it down” but who does not express an aggressive attitude or what we've come to label as “masculine” or “male” energy is sometimes seen as weaker or not compatible in the everperpetuated butch/femme dichotomy.

I think we need to re-examine maleness and masculinity in a way that doesn't carry the assumptions of what “masculine energy” looks like. Is it so far entrenched in our psyche or queer collective consciousness that we must tie masculine to stereotypical “maleness” and oppose it to stereotypical "femaleness" and femininity in this cyclical way that is neither definitive or serving to us?

There are different shades of masculinity, but only one of those shades or sides of the spectrum receives precedence: the butch, the AG, the aggressive, the dom, the macha. They are usually seen as more “legit”and also more desirable. This plays out similarly in transmasculine and transmen circles a lot of times.This outward display, the way a person “holds themselves” or projects a certain image of this particular brand of masculinity, and essentially the way they interact and

participate in this world as this very specific portrayal of masculinity is often validated while other forms of masculinity are invalidated.

Masculine energy. Should this always be tied to white patriarchal notions? Let's define that...the colonizers had very specific ideas about the place of a man and woman and what the behaviors of a man and woman should look like. A woman was responsible for the private sphere (the home) and the man was responsible for interactions in the public sphere. The man had a whole list of traits and characteristics tied to what we think of today as "masculine" and "manly" while the woman took on the polar opposite of all these "manly-man traits." She was to be soft-spoken, demure, docile, loving, the caregiver, etc. This "balance" was stifling to women and in many ways against the ways gender roles played out in the pre-colonial societies of our ancestors. I won't "go in" on this..as I've talked about this in a previous post.

Should the butch/femme dynamic always take its cues from this type of â&#x20AC;&#x153;balancingâ&#x20AC;? of male and female roles and behaviors? Why does masculine and feminine have to look so static and replicate hetero relationships and a patriarchal model?

Are QPOC subversive in their relationships? Do we sometimes appear to be replicating this model but our relationships are more complementary like those relationships of our ancestors? I can't say I've seen much of this in the very visible relationships in some of our circles. But maybe the folks in these relationships aren't part of any "scenes". Maybe they've been alienated like us masculine folks who don't adhere to the assumptions of how we should act and be. I don't have the answer.

And if we are subversive- in our attempted subversion do queers, feminists, womanists, and radicals still accidentally recreate the ever so problematic

patriarchy by unconsciously being committed to concepts of masculine and feminine being tied to these entrenched societal notions of male and female?

At the end of the day, I guess I'm just confused about why strength looks like an aggressive male or female. Why is it tied to the traits of a "man"? Why is this "more desirable" in our communities a lot of times? And what is masculinity and femininity really if we take away these assumptions and the characteristics we're socialized to believe are male and female? What is masculine and feminine energy when not tied to perceptions of strength and roles we've been assigned? And why is this energy in people so polarized? Why is the polarization of this energy valued so much in this society? Is it because it makes it easier to know who should have power and who shouldn't? Seems to work pretty well in a maledominated society. But with the Amazons, were the "less aggressive" women deemed weaker? Did they have less power? How does this work in matrilineal and matriarchal societies (that people swear don't exist...but I personally know of at least 2).

So many questions. Plenty of time. btw1 male noun a : a male person : a man or a boy b : an individual that produces small usually motile gametes (as spermatozoa or spermatozoids) which fertilize the eggs of a female alright...hmm...scientific

2 male adjective of, relating to, or characteristic of the male sex of, relating to, or being the sex that produces gametes which fertilize the eggs of a female ok more science...

Origin of MALE Middle English, from Anglo-French masle, male, adjective & noun, from Latin masculus First Known Use: 14th century <<<<uh...

mas路cu路linea:male b : having qualities appropriate to or usually associated with a man <<??

Masculinity is possessing qualities or characteristics considered typical of or appropriate to a man.

What does that even meeean?

Just some food for thought. -AGQ

Decolonizing Gender in Our QPOC/POC Community- Reclaiming Oldways Starting with Concepts of Gender

Well, well. It's been quite some time. I've been on the grind working on submitting plays, applications to programs, finishing a novel and anthology, “organizing” in the community for food justice, food sovereignty, economic and health justice, among many, many other things. I've got a lot to talk about but today I feel drawn to talk about queer people of color and views on gender. I came across some posts a few weeks ago about the way that certain masculine of center folks want to be addressed by male pronouns or to their children as dad or to their friends as bro/brother. There seemed to be consensus on this particular thread that this wasn't ok and that these “MOC's” were “trying” to be something they weren't or that they needed to “try” harder if they couldn't pass with others. Lots of policing around gender expression happens in the queer community. I used to think that because we were queer or identified as LGBT that we had this innate ability to be more understanding about variance in our community. But, this was and continues to be a detrimental assumption. After all, what is the queer community but a microcosm of society with all (and maybe even more of) the same ailments of the community at large (of course with some variation and nuances). Sometimes queer people of color can be the least forgiving. Not all the time, but sometimes. Especially when it comes to gender. Perhaps if we knew a little bit more about how our conception of gender came about and our true history, we'd let go of rigid western european views and embrace a more comprehensive view of ourselves, as our ancestors did. First, let's get on the same page. This is from good old Wiki and good enough for our purposes, I guess: A gender role is a set of social and behavioral norms that are generally considered appropriate for either a man or a woman in a social or interpersonal relationship. There are differences of opinion as to which observed differences in behavior and personality between genders are entirely due to innate personality of the person and which are due to cultural or social factors, and are therefore the product of socialization, or to what extent gender differences are due to biological and physiological differences. Gender roles differ according to cultural22

historical context, and while most cultures express two genders, some express more. (Androgyny, for example, has been proposed as a third gender. Other societies have been claimed to have more than five genders,and some nonWestern societies have three genders –man, woman and third gender.)Gender expression refers to the external manifestation of one's gender identity, through "masculine," "feminine," or gender-variant or gender neutral behavior, clothing, hairstyles, or body characteristics.

Our (Hir)story The way our community views gender today is not rooted in our (read: POC) traditions. During colonization our traditions were repressed and during slavery, western patriarchal notions reigned supreme. Men were supposed to keep their women in line. Men were to have power over women in all spheres. Especially the “public spheres.” Westerners believe whatever gender is predominant in/controls the public sphere (i.e. business and trade, etc.) has the most power. Many have pointed out that this isn't true when applied to pre-colonial African society. Though anthropologists argue that power and authority are vested in, or come from, who controls the public domain, in African society women are involved in both the public and private domain. In pre-colonial Africa women had a role in business as well as were revered in the home. Their voice in decision-making for their communities was extremely important. Though we see remnants of this today, it seems that our society is caught up with certain types of power being “masculine” or “feminine.” Masculine power trumping feminine of course. Our ancestors, before and during slavery, functioned with the complementarity of gender roles, meaning they "shared power" while complementing one another's roles. com·ple·men·ta·ry: Combining in such a way as to enhance or emphasize each others qualities. Though there was hierarchy in male and female roles in both the public and private sphere and some hierarchy between the sexes in some aspects of African 23

life, it wasn't the same as the uneven balance of power in relationships between males and females in western society. We've got to abandon the colonizer's mentality and focus more on the significance of the complementary roles that our ancestors had. (This is not only true for Africa but also true in Mexico, Central and South America- and most colonized lands). Women had the dopest roles of all as healers. In some parts of Africa, women were seen as more intuitive and closer to nature and nature is extremely important in African cosmology and spirituality. You see, Nature is respected not only because of its association with the Supreme but also because of its relevance to humankind. Imagine that! So, the fact that a woman is thought to be more attuned to nature points to her significance to the tribe as a powerful mediator and channel of the Supreme Being in a healing capacity. So, for our ancestors, the relationships between males and females was different. Gender expression and roles were completely different. Not rigid and suffocating. Our ancestors weren't invested in the same kinds of ways that westerners/ the colonizers are in gender determining your role. There were societies in which women took on “male roles” and “maleness,” becoming “male” for certain social or spiritual reasons. There were certain Native American societies where men lived as women and women as men. Two-spirited. And this was honored and respected. People weren't expected to be polarized on either side of the spectrum for the sake of defining roles and knowing what pronouns to use. If you look at the literature there are some societies with 3 genders, 5 genders, and more. They aren't restricted to this male-female binary which determines almost every aspect of western life. What you're going to wear. Maybe even where you can work or what position you can have. Or how much money you'll make. What bathroom to use, etc, etc. Basically- how much power you're allowed to have and how you should be treated. For better or for worse. What a shame that people get so stuck on gender presentation and expression that they can't relate with another person. These days it's grounds for isolating people. It's grounds for aggression and injuring or killing others.

Gender Variance and Healing Two-spirited, gender non-conforming people have a long past as healers. Dig and you'll find this out. (I'd start with Leslie Feinberg's Transgender Warriors- if you've got others, let me know.) Being between genders- neither male or female or maybe being both, was thought to be a gift in the past, and still is considered sacred in some societies today. In many shamanic traditions, there was the idea that combining the characteristics of both sexes and both genders could connect one to a transcendent spiritual realm. Two-spirited folks were messengers of the Creator, visionaries, dream interpreters, keepers and teachers of spiritual principles, and medicine people. They were called on to do burials, bless unions and births and perform other ceremonies. Because they embodied both Mother Earth and Father Sky and held both a masculine and feminine heart within their souls (two spirits), they were perceived as having twice the power. They were thought to be more able to be fair and to be able to see into the hearts of males and females. Since they inhabited both masculine and feminine in one body they were thought to be able to “see” with both the eyes of men and women. This made them mediators and bridges. They were also seen as mediators between two worldsthat of Spirit and the human world, as well as between partners, tribe, and nation. In older world religions, the gods and goddesses in-between genders were viewed as whole-gendered and therefore balanced.

In fact, the suppression of our gender expression can be seen as a barrier to our wholeness. Some say that two-spirited people/gender non-conforming folks are an “affirmation of humanity's pre-gendered unity”. We're the representatives of this previous form of solidarity and wholeness that was present before the split of humans into men and women. Put that in your pipe and smoke it genderphobic colonizers.

Decolonizing our Minds We have got to continue to decolonize our minds. Forget everything we've been taught and search for the oldways. We have got to reclaim our traditions because the “education” we are getting now is not serving us. In order to survive- no, thrive- we've got to begin to care about the constant poisoning of our knowledge-base and the severance of ties to our traditions. In Amerika, the multicultural melting pot, we are stuck on differences. Some search for commonalities. I'd like us who consider ourselves “radical” or visionary to move past this and connect to the spirits of others and see their humanity. What's truly radical is seeing that we all want happiness and that we all want to avoid suffering. The Dalai Lama once talked about how this was how he was able to relate to so many people from so many walks of life. It's not radical to point out the differences in ideologies, others faults, and why we're better/more educated/more radical than others. What's radical is holding people within your community accountable for their transphobia, misogyny (internalized and externalized), misandry, xenophobia, racism, fat phobia, etc. Check folks. Call them out. Challenge people. Why is a transwoman funny? Why is someone who has taken estrogen or testosterone or who had had surgery more trans or more legitimate and taken more seriously than a person who hasn't? Why is it taboo for two masculine of center folks to be together? Why is it okay for homophobia to exist within trans circles? Why is it ok for transphobia to exist within the queer community? Why is it ok for a gay male to be a misogynist and why is the patriarchy recreated within the LGBT community? Why do we mostly hear from white trans folks? If trans people of color are the most marginalized and the folks being murdered at a higher rate (an astronomical rate), why is there little discussion and only support one day out of the year? An elder transwoman on a recent trans panel discussion I was on demonstrated something profound. She took out a Tibetan singing bowl, held it tight with one hand and attempted to strike it to make it sound. There was an ugly clank. She tried again. Same. She let go of the bell and struck it and it made a beautiful 26

sound that continued to resonate for some time. She said that in society when people deny us our expression we are denied our authenticity and are like that bell that only clanks and isn't given the opportunity to sing. When society allows us to express our true selves and be who we are, we are able to truly sing like when she released the bell and struck it. What are you saying, Toi? Simply put: The policing of gender (and other identities), especially in the QPOC commnity, must STOP. We've got to decolonize our minds. De-assimilate. We need to know our (hir)story and reclaim the oldways. We've got to understand that our ideas on gender are limited and that they are a detriment to our community and the community at large. And we've got to hold others accountable. Including ourselves.

Why the world needs more QPOC/POC herbalists and healers I'm a firm believer that those who live at the intersections have a deeper and better understanding of the wants/needs of a larger number of folks. As a queer person of color interested in traditional healing, I know that I'm walking this path with few others that look like me. I've seen the classrooms and websites. I know that POC aren't clamoring to get into a “profession” where there aren't any certifications and there aren't any guarantees that you'll even break even, let alone be balling out of control. I get it. But, this is my path. I was always coming up with remedies as a kid. Giving advice to family members. The little doctor that could. I went on to school to do pre-med and I became the little doctor that couldn't...or wouldn't. I just didn't understand why it had to be so grueling and was not willing to put myself through 6 more years of anxiety. When I went on to study health advocacy and was diagnosed with lupus...I began to understand why medical school wasn't for me. As “allopathic”/conventional medicine failed me, I turned to herbalism and homeopathy. I knew I needed a more holistic approach. The specialists weren't addressing the root of my problem. They were only concerned with suppressing symptoms. How does that sound right to anyone? Through vegetarianism and trying to address symptoms for my chronic illness, I learned more about my body and maintaining balance through diet, supplements, exercise, etc. I became more and more interested in food as medicine. It seemed to me that the root of many people's illness is due to diet (not just our choices, but contaminated foods) and our environment. As I struggled to find what aggravated dis-ease in my own body, I began to see some commonalities in food allergies that I shared with other sufferers of autoimmune disorders. I experimented with raw food, gluten-free, dairy-free, low sugar....you name it. I took more vitamin D and more B-12. I took multivitamins and probiotics. There was so much information out there and not too many people I could trust for answers. If I had known a brown or even queer herbalist at the beginning of this journey...it might have been easier. 28

Why a queer brown herbalist? Because studies show (and trust me, I've studied this extensively) that brown folks and queer folks do better at helping brown folks and queer folks. No, it doesn't eliminate all the discrimination and bias...but it does lessen it quite a bit.

You know, I get tired of folks talking like brown folks are new to herbalism. This knowledge was stolen from our people. Truth. Look at most of the pharmaceuticals, they use herbs as major components and add synthetic filler. (Ex: Willow bark in aspirin). Native Americans, Africans and other Indigenous folks had it on lock. Healers worked with plants and addressed you emotionally, spiritually and physically. The colonizers were the ones who decided to split mind, spirit and body. So now we've got to go to a psychiatrist, a preacher, AND a doctor. Ahh me duele mi codo thinking about that. In other words, it hurts to think about paying an arm and a leg for all these separate services. The healers I know are versed in chinese medicine, medical astrology, herbalism, Ayurveda, the chakra system...all kinds of healing modalities. Not because they are interested in the next new age craze, but because they are invested in knowing as many ways as possible to heal and know that the ways overlap and intersect.

So maybe many of our People may not trust traditional medicine. We barely want to even go in to see a doctor, right? Well, while I think that herbalism and other kinds of medicine can be potentially for everyone, I understand why some people don't want to mess with it. Especially with the mistrust we have of the medical establishment due to some flagrant atrocities like sterilization, experiments like Tuskegee, etc. But, I think that may be even more reason for our community to turn to alternative healing practices.

I love that today more and more folks of color and QPOC are becoming doulas, acupuncturists, herbalists, etc. I'm optimistic that we are going to heal our community from the core. Barriers to positive physical health due to bias and discrimination need to be eradicated. In the meantime, for those of us who are called to do this healing work, let's get the education needed through programs, community skillshares, and elders. Why wait around for “anti-racist” doctors, allies, and the medical system to make changes when we can look to our own community for wellness (culturally relevant healing!). That said... I am fundraising for a community herbalist program. I want to be a cocreator of this vision for a queer and POC community that is physically, spiritually and emotionally well. I have some ideas for how I want to use the knowledge attained from the herbalist program. I want to:  provide blog detailing my journey as an herbalist  create a quarterly zine sharing knowledge learned, dedicated to health and food justice  Organize a collective of holistic healers whose focus will be to provide culturally appropriate, affordable care to people of color, the queer community, and low/no-income folks 30

ď&#x201A;ˇ Organize a holistic health event free to the public designed to provide information on different healing modalities and promoting healthy, culturally appropriate diets. You can read more about the vision here: http://www.gofundme.com/communityherbalist I hope that you'll join me in being a co-visionary and spread the word about the need for more Q/POC holistic healers in our communities. Maybe you've even felt called to become one. Let's create this new Reality and be Whole again, individually and as a community. And check out my new blog: queerherbalism.blogspot.com and Herbal Freedom School Page: http://queerherbalism.blogspot.com/p/herbal-freedom-school.html

Countering Racism & Oppression in Holistic Healing It’s true, folks. No matter how radical we may think that holistic healing work is, it’s not revolutionary if we continue to oppress others (especially those we are providing healing work to) during this movement. Unless we are earnest with ourselves about power dynamics, our privilege (this could be race, gender, ability, etc.), and our biases, we trap ourselves in in the very patterns that persist in the broken health care system and we severely limit our healing abilities. Power imbalances exist between herbalists and those who come to them to be healed/ to co-heal. As healers who are very much human, we bring in our assumptions and biases. We can’t leave them at the door. They are very much present in our consultations and inform our healing work. We encounter all types of people who have had all types of experiences. If we are going to work with them on a physical, emotional, spiritual and energetic level, it’s important that we don’t allow our biases to harm this vulnerable person who has come to us for healing or prevention. According to “Revel and Riot” anti-oppression involves recognizing and deconstructing the systemic, institutional and personal forms of disempowerment used by certain groups over others. By examining things like social structures, group dynamics and patterns of oppression (like racism, sexism, heterosexism, classism, etc) we can begin to work towards equalizing the power imbalance in our communities. Through this, we bring each other strength by recognizing the interconnectedness of our struggles while deepening our understanding of our own roles, power and privilege in society, as well as the varied and valuable experiences of others. What does an anti-oppressive framework look like for holistic healers? 1. It’s acknowledging systemic barriers to health and those communities that are disproportionately affected by them. 32

2. It’s continuously checking your privilege and biases and making sure it doesn’t inform your treatment of co-healers/clients/patients/customers. 3. It’s making an effort to understand histories of oppression and acknowledging and accepting cultural differences because denial of these histories and colorblindness are microaggressions and sure signs of privilege. Folks of color rarely have the luxury of waking up and having a day to navigate where they don’t have to know what color they are. Many visibly queer folks don’t have this privilege either. There is a lot of discrimination going on in the health care system based on race, gender, sexuality, immigration status, etc. and it’d be terrific if folks could go in to get holistic health care and not have to worry about racism, sexism, or homophobia/transphobia. I’ve seen that in holistic care the same issues ring true as with “liberal” and “progressive” cities/communities. People believe that these problems just don’t exist. People believe they are far too enlightened and therefore don’t need to check their biases or privileges. They’ve already done the work and aren’t capable of discrimination. This is just as dangerous as overt racism, homophobia, or xenophobia, if not more dangerous. A portrait Let me give you a few examples of how all this plays out in holistic health care: 

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The power dynamic is off and clients/co-healers of color or queer clients/cohealers are infantalized or the healer takes on a paternalistic role. Consultations with healers may feel unsafe because of paternalism or assumptions based on racism/homophobia/sexism/ableism,etc. Healers reach out to a certain demographic over another because of racial biases and assumptions. Perhaps they think that a certain community isn’t interested in being healthy or in holistic health because of these assumptions.

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Failure to work with folks who are low income because they “won’t” follow a treatment plan or can’t show up on time (usually this is due to them working multiple jobs and trying to support a family) Making the Effort, Committing to Change It’s up to you to make the effort to examine the ways in which you contribute to the perpetuation of all these “-isms”. Do you really want to bring biases and phobias into your healing work? There’s no way to be neutral and, despite what many may think, being a healer does not make you immune to socialized bigotry. If you are committed to creating a healthier world, why bring such toxicity into your practice? In healing from these socialized behaviors and your own internalized oppression you are becoming more whole and, in doing that, becoming a much better healer. Please also remember, in your quest for knowledge of anti-oppression, that it is your own duty to educate yourself. It is not the duty of marginalized communities to teach you. Please also remember that there is no ‘mastering’ this work. It is on-going, difficult, and often goes unrewarded from others. But what a gift it is to be conscious, Whole, and not perpetuate cycles of injustice and to join the Revolution!

Other Resources Data/Statistics LGBT Health Care Discrimination When Health Care isn’t caring National Coalition fior LGBT Health: All of the Above: LGBT People of Color Racial Bias in Health care Reducing racial bias among health care providers 34

Study on implicit bias among healthcare providers Beyond misdiagnosis, misunderstanding, and mistrust Medical Apartheid: The Dark History of Medical Experimentation on Black Americans from Colonial Times to the Present Unnatural Causes- Is Racism making us sick? Trans/Gender Non-Conforming http://www.lambdalegal.org/sites/default/files/publications/downloads/whci c-insert_transgender-and-gender-nonconforming-people.pdf National Transgender Discrimination Survey Report on Health and Health Care Immigrants Fear, Immigration and Discrimination http://outreach-partners.org/docs/FAN%20Fear%20Factsheet.pdf 10 Harmful Misconceptions about Immigration http://www.equalrightscenter.org/site/DocServer/REPORT_FINAL_WEB_7.pdf ?docID=151 Anti-Oppression Resources and Exercises http://organizingforpower.org/anti-oppression-resources-exercises/ http://washingtonpeacecenter.net/node/5056 Tools for Challenging Oppression from Within Undoing Racism How Queers are Organizing for Health Care Reform

Being an Ally Dos and Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ts of being a Good Ally http://karnythia.livejournal.com/1387435.html?format=light 10 Ways to be an Ally http://whitepriv.blogspot.com/2010/02/10-ways-to-be-and-ally.html 35

6 Rules for Allies http://blip.tv/sharon-bridgforth/6-rules-for-allies-3271535 7 Rules for Allies- Paper https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B9OOswvN7DcBMU1FT0ZUeUUzRGs/edit Highly Recommended readings from the Anti-Racist Alliance http://www.antiracistalliance.com/bibliography.htm

Stay tunedâ&#x20AC;Śmore to come

in the Afro-Genderqueer chronicles!!!

Contact: gqstreetpoet@gmail.com Websites: philosophactivist.blogspot.com www.afrogenderqueer.com www.facebook.com/afrogq

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Other Writings: Genderqueer Files: La Qolectiv@ (A play and novel)

A story of Rebellion, Resistance, Reclamation, Revolution, and espĂritu/Spirit. A collective of brown, radical gender/queers find that to continue to protect and heal their community that they must discover their innate super powers tied to their indigenous spirituality and the wisdom of their ancestors. Notes from an Afro-Genderqueer Philosophactivist

A collection of blogs, essays, and articles addressing intersections of race, gender, sexuality, ability, anti-racist organizing, organizing within queer people of color/people of color communities, and much, much more. Written by a brown, genderqueer. Notes from an Afro-Genderqueer Philosophactivist 2 Volume 2 of your favorite brown, queer anthology.