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Burnsville | Eagan November 29, 2013 | Volume 34 | Number 40

Hope for escaping domestic violence

Guardian accused of stealing An Eagan man who had guardianship of a man in adult foster care is accused of stealing his money. Page 3A

OPINION School levies raise questions Columnist Joe Nathan congratulates districts on successful levy campaigns, but equity concerns linger. Page 4A

THISWEEKEND

Advocacy services work to combat, prevent domestic violence by Natalie Conrad SUN THISWEEK DAKOTA COUNTY TRIBUNE

Domestic violence and abuse are difficult problems to solve, but there is hope. Before or after law enforcement steps in, a variety of advocacy services are available to help victims break free of domestic violence, whether their needs are physical, emotional, financial, legal or otherwise. Burnsville-based 360 Communities has operated Lewis House shelters for women and children who have been victims of domestic violence since 1979. The shelters have helped more than 65,000 survivors over that time.

Survivor encourages victims to seek help to end abusive relationships by K.T. Bernhagen SPECIAL TO SUN THISWEEK DAKOTA COUNTY TRIBUNE

Nearly 40 people across the state have lost their lives to domestic violence this year, more than double the number of similar incidents reported last year. This series is focusing on levels of domestic violence, its psychological aspects and what can be done to help those abused behind closed doors. This is Part 3, which looks at local resources. A follow-up story to the series will run in a future edition. More than 2,500 women and children are supported annually at the sites in Eagan and Hastings – that’s nearly seven victims per day. “Once you start seeing those red flags, you should call an advocate,� Ann Sheridan, director of violence prevention for 360 Communities, said of 360’s trained volunteers and professionals who have prevented countless cases where violence would have escalated with-

out intervention. Among the first steps is finding housing. Lewis House offers temporary housing for victims and advocates who help give them a safe and affordable place to live. They also help coordinate retrieval of belongings or going back to their home. While food shelf services are offered, 360 Communities also tends to the See ABUSE, 17A

Shout out to grandparents

I am a domestic abuse survivor. I would not be where I am today if it wasn’t for the amazing people surrounding me. I was able to grow resilience because of the love and support I received from my friends, family and community. Speaking out about abuse is my way of giving back and expressing gratitude after escaping my abusive marriage. Love can be healthy, or love can be dysfunctional and dangerous. Love is not controlling. Love is not shame or blame. Abuse and control are not love. Adrenaline can trick you into thinking it’s love, but it’s not. I was in an abusive re-

District 191 talks go to mediation

Michael Bolton will be delivering his classics – and an abridged version of his recent “Jack Sparrow� YouTube hit – at a Burnsville concert. Page 23A

by John Gessner SUN THISWEEK DAKOTA COUNTY TRIBUNE

THISWEEKEND

The second-graders from Deerwood Elementary in Eagan gave a loud and proud greeting to an audience of grandparents and special friends during a Grandparents’ Day performance Nov. 26. Under the guidance of music teacher Lisa Schoen, the students sang a program of songs ranging from holiday themes to patriotic anthems. (Photo by Rick Orndorf)

The Burnsville boys hockey team lost its opener to state power Hill-Murray but showed skill and depth. Page 15A

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INDEX Opinion . . . . . . . . . . . . 4A Sports . . . . . . . . . . . . 15A Announcements . . . . 17A Public Notices . . . . . . 17A Classifieds . . . . . 18A-21A

News 952-846-2033 Display Advertising 952-846-2011 Classified Advertising 952-846-2000 Delivery 952-846-2070

See SURVIVOR, 16A

Teachers press for settlement

Bolton in Burnsville

Encouraging start for Blaze

lationship for 13 years. While I was in it, I thought I was in love. It wasn’t until I got out that I was able to see clearly what my life had become. There was never a frontal attack that I would have recognized as abuse. It was just a continuous stream of actions and words disguised as jokes. Jane Gilgun, a professor with the University of Minnesota’s College of Education and Human Development, calls it “kidding on the square,� which is putting someone down while presenting it as a joke. My example is a situation where my young daughter was sitting on the couch with her father. He looked into the kitchen at me and said, “Look at your mom. She’s so beautiful, she’s so hot. Too bad

Sometimes wearing union T-shirts, School District 191 teachers are signaling frustration over the pace of negotiations on a new two-year contract. All 750 members of the Burnsville Education Association were asked to wear their “United 2.0� shirts to work on Tuesday, Nov. 26, the day contract talks went to mediation. Negotiators for the Burnsville-Eagan-Savage district filed for nonbinding talks with a state-appointed mediator after six meetings with union nego-

tiators. BEA President Bob Nystrom said it’s “unusual� for either side to file for mediation that quickly. “That was at the end of October and the sides have not met since, though we have kept our calendars open and asked that we do meet,� Nystrom said Nov. 22. He didn’t rule out the possibility that a settlement could be reached at the first mediation session, which occurred the day this edition went to press. Chief district negotiator Stacey Sovine didn’t return phone calls. Salary is the sticking point, Nystrom said. “I can assure you that See CONTRACT, 18A

Volunteer trio gives one last year to Armful of Love Holiday gift program serving 1,100 families by John Gessner SUN THISWEEK DAKOTA COUNTY TRIBUNE

Bill McReaken served in the Navy Supply Corps and worked as a vehicle fleet manager for the old ConTel phone company. These days, the 70-yearold Burnsville resident is field general of the dropoff and pickup depot for the annual Armful of Love holiday gift program. McReaken calculates per-family storage space for the clothes and toys sponsors buy needy families. He knows the aisle width between storage rows. “You should see him with his blue 3M tape,� said Kathryn Archambault, volunteer and community relations coordinator for Burnsville-based nonprofit 360 Communities, which has run Armful of Love for some four decades. “What he can do with a ruler and 3M tape amazes me, let me tell

The three volunteer coordinators for the Armful of Love holiday gift program are retiring after this year. From left are Bill and Lorna McReaken of Burnsville and Carla Mathwig of Apple Valley. (Photo by John Gessner) you.� They aren’t just any vol- families to securing storMcReaken is one of a unteers in a program that age space and adding lasttrio of longtime Armful runs on dozens of them. minute supplements to gift volunteers who are retir- Archambault is Armful packages. ing this year. Bill, his wife, of Love’s staff overseer, “They have really Lorna, and Carla Math- but it’s the McReakens touched more lives in wig, of Apple Valley, will and Mathwig — working the community than we end their years of service 40- to 50-hour weeks from know,� Archambault said. after recipient families October through DecemThe longest-serving of pick up their gifts over a ber — who make sure ev- the three is Mathwig, 58, three-day period in mid- erything gets done, from an Armful volunteer for December. interviewing recipient nearly 30 years. Now a

grandmother, she and her husband, Bill, had three young children when they first sponsored a family. “And I thought it was a wonderful learning experience for my kids,� Mathwig said. “I thought, ‘What a wonderful program — I want to help more.’ � Lorna McReaken was director of Rainbow Christian Preschool in Burnsville, gathering preChristmas donations of socks, hats and other items for Armful of Love when she signed on as a volunteer 15 years ago. “I got Bill started,� she said. “We were looking for a volunteer opportunity.� Lorna, 64, remembers the first time she worked at an Armful gift distribution. Some families, she said, are overwhelmed to receive multiple trash bags full of gifts. Sponsors, assigned individual families, are asked to buy two clothing items for each child and are also given two toy suggestions. Parents can request a gift, See ARMFUL, 18A

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