34/ETIQUETTE
06.05.2016
THE ETIQUETTE FORUM ADEKANMI OTEDOLA-OLUSANYA
email mretiquetteonline@yahoo.com
tel. 08112661635, 0809285 4855
How to Manage Hatred, Bitterness and Rejection (3) This week, I conclude on this four part series on how to manage hatred, bitterness and rejection. The main import of this series is that hatred, bitterness and rejection can be stepping stones to good opportunities and a better life. However, only those who see it from this ingenious perspective and imbibe the proper etiquette to those who hate, reject or offend them can gain the inherent advantages that accrue therein. WHY SHOULD YOU MANAGE REJECTION CAREFULLY? Whenever you are rejected by a person, institution or nation, you must make sure that you are not bitter over it. If you feel bitter over it, you must deal with the bitterness and get rid of it because until you get rid of the bitterness of rejection, you will not enjoy the blessedness of rejection. This is simply because bitterness and blessedness do not go well together! I know many
people who were jilted by men, rejected in marriage, kicked out of organisations, forced to retire, and who never enjoyed the benefits of rejection because they held on to bitterness and never got rid of it. A good example is that of Russian billionaire Boris Berezovski. He lost a legal dispute against fellow Russian tycoon Roamn Abramovic. After the loss he said life was becoming increasingly meaningless and soon after, he allegedly committed suicide. On the other hand, I know people who have managed rejection properly and have come out the better for it. HOW TO MANAGE BITTERNESS Like I said in previous parts of this series on managing bitterness, the bitterness from rejection is a negative emotion and you can deal with negative emotions by speaking positive words. Positive words when spoken consistently especially during moments of
acute pain and bitterness will lead to emotional healing. Secondly, never disparage those who rejected you just because they rejected you. Instead say something nice about them. If you cannot say anything nice about them do not say anything at all. Making negative comments about those that have rejected you in the past is an indication that you are still bitter and as long as you are in bitterness you can’t enjoy blessedness. Also, in certain cases you may need to substantiate your positive words with positive actions. For instance, if you were rejected as a contractor from a company, you could put a call through to them just to send a greeting. You could put a call to an ex lover who turned you down if you are still hurting. Such actions may aid your healing. THE BENEFITS OF MANAGING REJECTION PROPERLY Finally, remain positive about everything that
life has to offer. Also, you must understand that if you manage rejection properly, what you would later enjoy in acceptance would be far greater than what you suffer in rejection. I know many people who were turned down by certain partners who eventually got married to people who they appreciated and admired better. In all the cases, I spoke about people who were rejected and managed it well none of them would regret about the loss they suffered in rejection because the gains that have followed have far outweighed the losses. You could purchase a copy of my book on etiquette titled PROPER MANNERS AND ETIQUETTE IN ANYTHING AT ANYTIME AND ANYWHERE at the price of N3,500 at our corporate head office at 340 - 344 Ikorodu Road, by Idi-Iroko Bus Stop, Maryland, Lagos. Or call 0802 312 6010 or 0811 266 1635 to have a copy sent to you.
Alibaba founder Jack Ma was rejected thrice at Harvard and today Jack Ma has built Alibaba into one of the world’s largest online retailers and is China’s richest man
Sam Eto Fils was rejected at Premiership club Arsenal and later went on to achiever enviable success at Barcelona and Inter Milan
Reed Hastings offered to sell Netflix - a video streaming company he founded was rejected. Netflix has since gone on to become one of the most profitable Wall Street firms making Reed a billionaire
Curtis Jackson also known as “50 cent” was rejected at Columbia records and later went on to become one of the most successful rappers selling over 20 million records