Danger of Dating Violence (p

Girls Should Learn Warning Signs

Mary K. Grzybowski

It seems the entire country was caught up in the Gabby Petito case, hoping the young woman would be found safe, but fearing the worst. That came true when her body was found in September. Many hope that the good that can come out of her tragic death is that people will become more aware of the dangers of dating violence. Dating violence is an increasingly common issue, especially among young people and teenagers. This type of violence warrants its own research and name because it happens between two people in a close relationship. According to the Center for Disease Control, nearly 1 in 11 female high school students report having experienced physical dating violence in the past year. Dating violence includes physical, sexual, and psychological violence, as well as invasive behaviors like stalking. Because of the relationship, which often complicates things that would otherwise be interpreted as violence, it can be difficult for victims to leave the situation or even identify it as dating violence. Therefore, it is important to learn about the most common signs to avoid this difficult situation. If you use social media, and especially TikTok, you’ve probably seen the term “red flag” to refer to a quality that makes you want to avoid a person. Though some of the videos are intended to be jokes, the implications in dating violence are the same and very serious. There are specific qualities in partners that could possibly lead to dating violence or indicate a tendency toward violence. Students need to be aware of these signs so that they can be more safe and aware. Ms. Rachel Gombos, MSW, LISW says toxic monogamy is one of the most prominent of these signs. “This is essentially creating an environment where you are solely engaged with your romantic partner for all of Red Flags of Potential Dangers in a Dating Relationship as Listed at teendvmonth.org

*Excessive jealousy or insecurity; *Invasions of your privacy; *Unexpected bouts of anger or rage; *Pressuring a partner into unwanted sexual activity; *Blaming you for problems in the relationship; *Controlling tendencies; *Explosive temper; *Preventing you from going out with or talking to others; *Constantly monitoring your whereabouts and checking in to see what you are doing and who you are with; *Falsely accusing you of things; *Vandalizing or ruining your personal property; *Taunting or bullying; or *Threatening or causing physical violence.

your needs. They make rude comments when you make plans with friends instead of them; they make rules in the relationship,” Ms. Gombos said. She specifically points out that partners who always want to know where you are or forbid you to be friends with someone of the opposite gender are dangerous. “These things are toxic and create an environment where your partner isolates you,” she said. Most people can instinctually recognize violence and seek to avoid it when it comes from a stranger. However, when it comes from a close partner in a relationship, is it easy to misinterpret the abuse as something that is allowed between partners. It is important to remember that circumstance doesn’t change the significance and the consequences of violence. The grey area between jealousy and protectiveness in a relationship and a potential for dating violence is difficult to navigate in an already stressful situation. “When we put boundaries around violence only meaning physical threats, we create the opportunity for someone to not question ‘jealous’ or ‘protective’ behavior,” Ms. Gombos said. In other words, don’t accept invasions of privacy, explosive tempers, taunting, and excessive monitoring in a relationship just because it doesn’t seem violent in the traditional sense. If dating violence does occur to an individual, she should first find a person she trusts. It can be difficult for victims of violence to feel safe going to an authority figure right away, so friends are often the first to know and the first to offer support. “‘How can I best help you?’ This response is my first suggestion when someone shares difficult information with you. You don’t have to pretend to be an expert on something when you are not,” she said. Simply listening to a friend and supporting her as she goes to a trusted adult for help may be all she needs from you at this time. Victims of dating violence should keep in mind that abusers want to try to isolate them and create a situation of dependence, according to Ms. Gombos. Keeping friends and family, especially your parents, close and realizing that you don’t have to go through it alone is the most important part of safely dealing with dating violence. NDA Counselor Ms. Abby Beham ‘09 said, “If someone is worried about someone's safety, they should let a trusted adult know what is going on. This is not something that a student should have to carry on her own. A student's counselor or any of the Safe Listeners at NDA, as well as a parent, would all be good people to talk with.” Ms. Beham also suggests other resources: Teen Dating Violence Line at 419-241-7386; loveisrespect.org; and bethanyhousetoledo.org.

Women Reach New Heights as Role Models

Regan Carnes

From influencing American politics to advocating for environmental issues, the world is full of many diverse and influential women in leadership positions. Ms. Kathrin Jansen is the Senior Vice President and Head of Vaccine Research and Development at Pfizer. In this leadership role, Ms. Jansen supervises over 700 employees. Thanks to her intelligence and commitment, the company successfully produced and distributed the Pfizer COVID-19 vaccine in just 11 months, “a remarkable achievement” according to Forbes Magazine. She has also led the development of vaccines such as Gardasil and Prevnar13. She overcame gender-bias in a maledominated field, as well. “Follow your dreams, no matter what people tell you,” Ms. Jansen said. Her impact on the drug development industry has saved lives and prevented countless infections. Rihanna may be a famous singer and actress, but she is also a businesswoman and powerful advocate for social justice. She owns the company Fenty, which is worth over $2.8 billion. Rihanna uses this successful platform to promote inclusivity and diversity. The company is known for distributing a wide range of makeup products for all skin tones. Rihanna also uses her celebrity status to fight against racial injustice. “When I see these injustices happening, it’s hard to turn a blind eye. It’s hard to pretend it’s not happening. The things that I refuse to stay silent on, these are the things that I genuinely believe in,” she said. As First Lady, Dr. Jill Biden proudly fights for educational rights. A teacher herself, Dr. Biden believes that all students deserve an accessible and affordable college education. “Teaching isn’t just what I do, it’s who I am,” Dr. Biden said. She is ambitious and diligent, as she balances both her duties as First Lady and her teaching career at Northern Virginia Community College. “In the position as First Lady, not only does she give voice to that from a place of understanding, she has an opportunity to create a platform and to have influence,” President of the National Education Association Ms. Becky Pringle said. Greta Thunberg began to spread environmental awareness in 2018 as she initiated the “School Strike for Climate.” Since then, Ms. Thunberg has addressed the U.N., spoken with the Pope, and led “the largest climate demonstration in human history” in 2019, according to Time Magazine. Ms. Thunberg is known for her honesty and powerful voice. At the age of 18, she inspires young people to use their own voices to demand change. These women leaders and so many others show that women are powerful and can lead to change.

New NDA Cabinet Aims to Recognize Diversity

Chelsea Fall Executive Student Council has added the new Inclusion Cabinet to its governing body to focus on following diversity and promoting inclusion throughout the NDA community. Senior Niah Lee and sophomore Emersyn Rindler head the Inclusion Cabinet and have some exciting ideas planned for this year. The girls frequently will create posters and informational news boards about celebrations or highlights of other cultures.

Emersyn and Niah have been designing the bulletin board in front of the Resource Center to celebrate other cultures. National Hispanic Heritage Month was the first to be on the board. During this time, they also created a schoolwide presentation where they showed a video and later played a Kahoot for pep points about the information in the video. “We want people to be informed and excited about different cultures. We feel it's important to know things about other

The Inclusion Cabinet celebrates Indigenous Peoples’ Month. Photo by: Chelsea Fall

people and not just what is happening to you,” Niah said. They look for involvement so that inclusion within the NDA community can grow.

Focusing on different cultures and leaders in those cultures has been the most important part of the cabinet. “These leaders represent the message that we want to spread within our community. They show what it means to be inclusive and are strong women within their cultures,” Emersyn said. They want to show the importance of women in other cultures, as well as promoting the message of diversity throughout leadership. Being an all girls’ school, it is important to the Inclusion Cabinet that not only do they focus on including diversity, but also include important women who share this message.

They also have a focus on indigenous women throughout history who have fought for their rights as women and the rights of their culture. These women promote the message that Niah and Emerson have been promoting throughout the school year. The leadership ability of these women and their attention to spreading awareness of their cultures is important to sharing the lessons with the NDA school community and society.

Students will continue to see the Inclusion Cabinet make people more aware about inclusion throughout society. “We are excited to see the changes that we can make in inclusion this school year and are happy to be spreading the messages that we are,” Emersyn said.