YOUR HEALTH
Anxiety and depression ‘A silent crisis in men’s mental health’ has lately been the experts’ description of terrible statistics on men’s rates of depression and suicide. Importantly, it also describes a too-common reluctance among men to seek help. Words by Ben Ebert, Lane Cove psychologist specialising in working with men www.northsydneypsychologists.com.au
Life is not a bowl of cherries and a rotten batch of anything – events, relationships or situations – can make anyone feel ‘down’, especially if things are beyond our control. Even positive events such as the birth of a baby can trigger depression or anxiety for a man, as it can for a woman. Yet feeling down does not signal depression unless it is an intense sadness that interferes with everyday life for an inexplicably long time. Like stress, anxiety is a normal response to pressure, but it should pass once the stressful situation has passed, or ‘stressor’ is removed. Anxiety is a problem when it’s ongoing and flares up without cause. Symptoms include excessive worrying, muscle tension, even nausea. So it’s debilitating. Those who’ve suffered a panic attack know the sudden, heightened fear and feeling out of control.
Young men One in seven young men aged between 16 and 24 experience depression or anxiety each year. Signs often go unrecognised and are passed off as 'part of growing up', resulting in young people not getting help.
Older men While common, depression and anxiety are not always part of ageing, nor do they suggest weakness of character – they're a health issue like any other. Depression and anxiety in older 18 TVO AUGUST 2019
people happen for all sorts of reasons: most frequently dealing with physical limitations and illness, personal loss, and isolation. Grief should never be underestimated and grief counselling is valuable for many dealing with loss.
More than a bad patch Signs that it is depression or anxiety rather than a sad or bad patch include: • o ngoing depressed mood on most days for several weeks • n ot enjoying previously enjoyable activities on most days over several weeks • recurring thoughts of suicide • sleep problems • Poor concentration and memory
Suicide Many men have thoughts of suicide and many view it as a sign of weakness. Rather than weakness, it’s usually the result of feeling overwhelmed and/or immense emotional pain, and is not something to be ashamed about.
Seeking help, at any age Men who are not natural ‘talkers’ might ask ‘what good can mere talking do?’ Yet recognising that help is needed and seeking it is a massive step towards managing and overcoming problems. ‘Opening up’ is the next step. If you’re reluctant to seek professional help,
talking to a friend or family is a great start. Skype and phone sessions are options with many psychologists. One in eight men experience depression and one in five experience anxiety at some time. The number of men suiciding in Australia annually is nearly double the national road toll. An average of six out of every eight suicides each day are by men. And behind data and statistics, are always family and friends, a circle of lives shattered in a ripple effect to the extent that some are also at risk (see link Postvention Australia below).
“Signs often go unrecognised and are passed off as 'part of growing up', resulting in young people not getting help.”
Managing depression or anxiety • Reframe unhelpful thoughts as much possible: Can you think differently about things that trigger depression or anxiety? Observe if you are ‘catastrophising’ or being realistic. • Break down bigger tasks: into smaller ones and tackle one at a time. Do what you can, pat yourself on the back for what you have done and don’t be hard on yourself if you can’t achieve it all in one go.
