May, 2017
THE TOWER 5
How to end and recover from breadcrumbing in 3 steps By Chelsea Lange Amanda Matos 27, of Vernon, NJ was in a relationship for three years until she realized something. “I would sit at home picking myself apart when he was absolutely fine. I would think I was the problem but in reality he was,” said Matos. She continues by stating, “He would plan a time to meet when it was only convenient to him and would ask to get together without ever following through.” Matos, since has realized that she had been, breadcrumbed. Breadcrumbing gets misconstrued as the dating trend, ghosting. The “Huffington Post” describes ghosting as, “the instance when someone ends the relationship by cutting off all communication, without any explanation.” Although ghosting seems harsh, breadcrumbing is worse. Young millennials seem to keep on falling down this path of lies, miscommunication and quite frankly, a big waste of time. Breadcrumbing is when someone doesn’t really care for the person they’ve been dating but, continues to lead them on with random phone calls or text messages whenever they feel like speaking to them. Some individuals put all their time and energy into a significant other for months or even years just because they believe the relationship could eventually
work. Unfortunately, he or she is just NOT that into you. Ending the Relationship It could be difficult to realize that you have to end this relationship but you don’t deserve this. In the words of the Backstreet Boys it’s time to tell that person to, “quit playing games with my heart.” Cutting off communication is key, but before that, you need to explain why you are. He or she should know that you’re not “ok” with playing those games. Dr. Jack Sargent, Executive Director of The School of Communication, gave some words of encouragement by making you undergo realization. “What rewards are you getting out of this relationship? Think of your own self worth and respect,” he states. Take his words into consideration, what are you truly getting out of this? Start your emotional detox right away by telling that person your happiness is your first priority and that you’ll be moving on to the next chapter in your life. Take Steps Towards A New You After ending your relationship remember who you are and what you deserve. Don’t drag yourself down a path that won’t have a happy ending. Start by creating your better self. Matos took a step in the right direction by starting to
Photo: Katherine Cabrera Photos source: Flickr
Above: The dating game has changed forever Below: Urban Dictionary breaks down the new social term breadcrumbing
write her feelings in a journal and doing different activities. “Get out of your comfort zone and only surround yourself with people that mean most to you,” she states. Start Dating Dr. Sargent, also described how dating is ever-changing. “Dating has significantly changed with the advantage of social media with dating apps or media sites,” said Sargent. “But the desire for human connection
will remain the same.” Being vulnerable and putting yourself out there might be difficult but you will find desire for someone else. Not every guy or girl has the same traits as that breadcrumber. Remember not to hold yourself back from a new dating experience. There’s someone out there who knows your worth and how you should be treated. Chelsea Lange is a senior majoring in Sociology.
Millennials speak up after Pepsi commercial By Kiara Mays Today, Millennials (born 1980-2000) make up the largest, most diverse living generation in the United States, that’s roughly 80 million people. With that many people comes the challenge of understanding how and why this group of individuals think the way they think and care about the things they care about. A few of Kean University’s millennials tell us what social issues they are especially attentive to. “Equality. Everyone was created equally, I feel everyone should have a fair and equal chance, regardless of their race, gender, sexuality, etc.,” said Krista Vaeth, senior communication studies major.“I have friends and family that are gay; so equal rights for everyone is important to me.” Kendall Jenner recently made news headlines for starring in a controversial Pepsi commercial. In the commercial, Jenner was shown at a political protest where she walked through a crowd of protesters, can of Pepsi in hand, until she came face-to-face with a police officer. She handed the officer the Pepsi, which he accepted and cracked a smile thereafter, thus “curing” the world of all its social issues.
The commercial was then pulled immediately after receiving backlash for appropriating the Black Lives Matter movement and using social justice to sell soda according to CNN. While some individuals did not see an issue with the commercial, many felt otherwise and believed the ad made a mockery of real issues that people dedicate their time and efforts to. “As an African American, I care much about social injustice issues concerning the black community,” said Al-Tahnay Wells, sophomore communication major. “Aside from that, it’s ignorant and insensitive to assume the resolution to any protest is a damn Pepsi.” The Millennial Impact Project (MIP), an ongoing, comprehensive study of the millennial generation found that on average, 52.5% of Millennials identify themselves as activists. While one study conducted by the MIP found that Millennials care most about issues concerning the environment, education, and health, a second study found that Millennials named economic, gender issues, or wage as issues they care most about. “I definitely consider myself to be an activist for sure,” said Keily Padilla, sophomore public relations (PR) major.
Discrimination Report against the university to support their claims of “structural racism.” The threats and the coalition’s outcry drew widespread attention from Sen. Sweeney, the media and other legislators. Kean hired Rev. Michael Blackwell as a consultant to investigate the discrimination charges. But Rev. Blackwell’s credibility was questioned by the coalition and legislators. Rev. Slaughter wants Justice Wallace to conduct his own investigation, not review Kean’s report. He said he’s never met or spoken to Justice Wallace, but recommended him because of “his stellar reputation, experience and resume.” “In reference to Justice Wallace, Kean
Kendall Jenner starred in the conversonal Pepsi commercial
“At the moment, I try to use my voice as much as possible regarding issues concerning our environment because we are literally destroying our planet.” Evidently, as provided by these responses, millennials do not limit
Photo: Twitter
themselves to one specific cause; but instead, dedicate their time to a variety of causes and social issues. To learn more about the MIP, visit their website at: www.themillennialimpact.com
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University, as I suspected they would, did everything to make sure he never made it on that campus,” Rev. Slaughter stated in an email on March 10. “I believe Wallace’s independent forensic report would have exposed/revealed all the things the coalition and I spoke out against.” Kean’s full-time faculty union, the Kean Federation of Teachers (KFT), joined the ministers’ coalition in protest and also questioned the administration’s intentions. “If the university has nothing to hide, they have nothing to fear from an investigation by Justice Wallace,” said KFT President Dr. James Castiglione.
About 57 percent of the university’s student population is minority, according to 2016 data from Kean. The ministers contend that the students are set up for failure because Kean is cutting staff and faculty at the same time the minority population needs more support. Also, women and minorities are most often those who are terminated, they claim. The coalition cited several discrimination lawsuits filed against Kean, including that of Sherrell S. Holderman, a former Kean employee who alleged she was fired because of her race, gender and age. The university settled that case, and in doing so,
admitted no wrongdoing. Since then, other lawsuits against Kean have gained media attention. A former Kean honor student filed a lawsuit alleging Kean police used “excessive force” during his arrest in 2013 and harassed him on and off campus. A trial date has not yet been set for that case, which was first reported by The Tower. The university also settled a lawsuit with a former Kean police officer, Randy Diakunczak, who alleged the university fired him after he complained about racially and sexually-charged pranks within the Kean Police Department, NJ Advance Media reported.