The Stinger My First Love
Guidology An Undereducated Rant
After having survived near about four years, we deserve a break. I was told to always use my voice, always speak up when decisions are being made that affect not only me but also my peers, and with rumors flying, I will remain quiet no longer. To what am I referring you may ask? All of the ridiculous options for making up missed school due to weather. Yes, I am a senior, and I’ve come down with a nasty case of senioritis that’s been festering since third quarter sophomore year, but really, the one thing for which I have been praying since I was a freshman and the seniors had separate exams was to get out earlier than underclassmen - the earlier the better. I understand we need to have at least 180 days, but why now, why choose to enforce this with us? No, I absolutely do not want to sit in each class for another three minutes. I can barely stand the last five minutes of class as is, and contrary to popular belief, the minutes before homeroom are a rather productive period of time (studying, finishing homework, attending meetings and handling other club business), so to start the school day earlier would require opening the school to students earlier. To end the school day later would require students who work to drive at higher speeds or accept later shifts. The opportunity cost of extending the day is lost money that would otherwise be funding students’ higher education, which after all as teachers so often remind us, high school is preparation for college and the real world. Not to mention the logistical nightmare of busing and sports, and as we all know, no one messes with sports. As for the idea of taking away our breaks, seems a bit tit for tat, no? We have an unplanned day off so we lose a planned one. Well that was then, this is now. The teacher had something to teach then, and with the way the next few days consisted of cramming in material, I don’t think the teaching schedule was actually pushed back. I need my breaks; I’m fairly certain I can speak for the rest of the school with that statement as well. Yes, in the real working world, breaks are not found often, you work and work and then work some more and snow days are near about unheard of, you get to work no questions asked, but I am a student, I am a young adult, I still consider myself a kid, and I do not have the attention span to work and work and work some more. There’s a reason we lost a week of August. I no longer have my week long Labor Day vacation so that we would have the ability to add days onto the year without worrying about the July 1st cutoff. One would naturally be lead to believe that days would then be added onto the end of the year, not pulling them from the middle. Addressing the idea of having seniors take finals after graduation, to that I say I am already calculating in which classes I do not have to answer a single question to still pass. Well, I’m doing that regardless, but anyway, you get the point. When asked what he would change, even Mr. Emmaus said that students who have an A in the class should not have to take the final. I don’t want that much: all that I’m asking for is seniors to not have to take finals if grade improvement is not desired nor necessary, especially if you’re expecting us to come back after we’ve walked. In sum, please don’t rain on my senior parade. I’ve been waiting for this year for quite a while, I’ve played along, done well on standardized assessments to make the district look good. Please give me this.
Editor-in-chief Katrina Guido @Kitty_Guido
Managing Editor of News Destiny Nagle
English teacher Simpkins’s love affair with Benjamin Franklin
Managing Editor of Opinion Savannah Pukanecz @SavannahPukes Managing Editor of Feature Justine Coleman Managing Editor of Culture Emma Wang @ECaroline7 Managing Editor of Sports Steve Gudonis @_SteveG_ Online Editor Kevin Rodgers Section Editor of News Colleen Grablick @collllsss Section Editor of Opinion Dave Heiney Section Editor of Feature Christine Carlson Section Editor of Culture Eamon Dreisbach Section Editor of Sports John Lang @JohnLang05 Photo Editor Maura Benner Copy Editors Shaun Baillie Olivia Riccio Angeline Stein Adviser Denise Reaman
Editorial Policy The Stinger is a student-run newspaper published six times per year. Its content, which is the responsibility of the student staff, is not subject to direct administrative approval. The newspaper, which is designed as an open forum, serves to inform and entertain its readers as well as students interested in print media studies. Visit our website stingerehs.com. If you are interested in writing or taking photos for The Stinger, stop by Room 559 for more information. If you’d like to publish a letter to the editor or have a story idea, drop us a line at stingerEHS@gmail.com. 2014 Keystone Press Awards Second Place Ongoing News Coverage First, Second, Honorable Mention Public Service Package First Place Feature Story First, Second Place Personality Profile Honorable Mention Column Writing Second Place Review Writing First Place Photo Story Honorable Mention Website 2013 Keysone Press Awards Second Place and Honorable Mention Column Writing First Place Public Service Package Second Place Feature Story First Place Ongoing News Coverage
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When Mr. Simpkins married me, he knew that he was not the only man in my life. This may sound like a sappy sentiment often shared about a girl and her father; but in this case, it is more serious than that. I am in love with another man, a much older and wiser man, with whom I fell in love because of his wit, his intelligence, and of course, his love for his country. Throughout my marriage to Mr. Simpkins, he has learned that this affair is one that he cannot fight and has come to embrace or even encourage it. This ‘other’ man has interrupted our marriage more than once, from our first wedding anniversary, to my twenty-seventh birthday, and even as recently as Jan. 17, when I knew I would see my BF again. On the morning of Jan. 15 at 6:45 a.m., two days before my BF’s 84th birthday, I received an email that set my heart a-flutter: entrance to his newly-renovated museum would be free in honor of his birthday. I immediately called Mr. Simpkins, waking him from his restful sleep to exclaim that this weekend, we would be going to Philadelphia in honor of my first love’s birthday. He groaned and then agreed as he knew that his protestations would be futile and that I could not be swayed. We spent that Saturday in the city celebrating and honoring my love for BF by viewing his many, many accomplishments at his museum, and going to his birthday party at the Portrait Gallery at Second Bank. My love affair with this great man began when I was an undergrad at Penn State University. I found him in an Early American Literature course, and from that moment on we were inseparable. I got to know him through his autobiography and the many other literature and history classes where I had the opportunity to get to know him. From these years together, I have learned that he: •Is the only man, (that I can think of), who likes to take air baths (i.e. where you lay on your back, naked, with the windows open to create a breeze; then roll over and lay on your stomach to ‘cleanse’ the other side) •Invented the first set of fins used for swimming •Was always trying to better himself through various experiments with virtues •Tricked his older brother into publishing his works in the newspaper by using a false name. And through all of my history with BF, Mr. Simpkins still married me anyway, knowing that he would always have to compete with my love for Ben Franklin. And to this very day he has been accepting of my double love-life. He has even suggested that if we should ever have a son, we could give him the middle name of Franklin. Although, his ulterior motive is for our son to be named after Penn State’s new football coach, James Franklin. But in the end, I suppose we might just both get our way.