Finance: Love + Money

Love + Money

A MODERN GUIDE TO HAVING THE MONEY TALK

By Lauren Caggiano

With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, love is in the air! You might be thinking about taking next steps in your relationship and that might mean commingling finances, or at least having important discussions related to money. If you decide to go that route, it’s important to exercise discretion and go into the conversation educated and open to dialogue.

Carrie Lamb, a financial advisor with Edward Jones in Fort Wayne, knows a thing or two about this topic. She’s a newlywed and counsels couples on emotionally charged topics like entering into financial unions, either while dating or recently married. “Coupling is joining a team, so approach money and how you’ll deal with it as a team,” she said. “Even if you keep accounts separate, it’s important to discuss and agree on how you’ll approach things.” For instance, it’s imperative that you discuss how much debt and what kind of debt you each have. That might mean credit cards, student loans, child support, etc. Also consider the goals you each have personally and as a unit and how your finances might play a role in attaining those goals. Lamb makes another important point in that each person will have different attitudes and emotions around money. “As a couple, you’ll need to come to a consensus about how you’ll deal with money together,” she said. “And each party will need to be okay with the decisions. Otherwise, resentment can build, and that’s not good for the marriage. Most studies show that money issues are among the main reasons for divorce. If you’re trying to avoid that, be open and honest and work as a team from the get-go.” Speaking of being transparent, according to Lamb, you’ll want to strategically plan the timing of these conversations. So, this begs the question: when should you have the “money talk”? In her words, “I don’t feel it’s ever too early (well it may not be great first date material) especially if you think the other person has different viewpoints or if you have big goals you’re determined to accomplish. You can only get where you want to go with open and honest communication and consensus on how to move forward.” The same goes for taking advantage of tools and resources. Per Lamb, you can’t go wrong with a financial literacy book or course. “And of course, I think a Financial Advisor is a good investment,” she added. Beyond these considerations, don’t overlook the obvious. “The biggest tip is talk to each other,” she said. “The second tip is create a spending plan and a savings plan (that’s what I call it, others call it a budget). Tell your money where to go otherwise it will tell you where you can go.” Lamb offers one last closing piece of insight: “Dream together. Dream big together. Write down your dreams. Find help breaking down what steps you’ll need to do achieve those dreams. Put dollar amounts to those steps. This is what I help people do every day.” a

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Resource: Carrie Lamb, Financial Advisor, Fort Wayne, 260.471.0013, edwardjones.com

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