The Sons of Eve Leslie Meyers
I did my best. God gave me two sons and I did my best with them. Abel was the kindest young man. I would watch him play in the meadow with the baby lambs and be reminded of how gentle and loving he’d always been since he was a boy. Cain also had a tender side. However, most of the time that side of him was masked in sullen moodiness. Cain had a temper that could leave deep wounds like a knife. Sometimes I would catch Cain staring at Abel as he tended to the lambs. There would be a sort of emptiness in his eyes. Every time I witnessed that look, my heart would catch slightly. What could I do? He was a man. He made his own choices. He made his own mistakes. I poured my heart out to God about him often. How could I not? He was my son. One night after supper I decided to speak with my firstborn; I left Abel to put out the fire and took Cain aside. We sat down in the middle of my favorite green meadow and I gazed up at the amazing twinkle light display above me. Cain laid his head on his knees and sighed. I reached over, rubbed his back, and asked the question I had been pondering for many nights. “What’s wrong, son?” Silence greeted me as I waited in the stillness for his response. His back began to slightly shake under my touch. I scooched close to him. His head fell lightly on my shoulder as I wrapped my arms around him. “You can tell me.” He let out a muffled sob he attempted to hold back with his hand. A minute later his 28
entire frame became racked with sobs. After he calmed down and let out a violent sniff, his head lifted from my shoulder and turned to look me in the eyes. I met his gaze and asked again, “What’s wrong?” He blinked. His gaze then lifted to the vast canopy of bright stars dancing above us. “Mom, do you ever feel like God made a mistake in making me?” I recoiled in shock. How could these words come out of my precious baby boy? “Son, why would you even say such a thing to me? You know God loves you.” “I know, Ma, but sometimes it feels like God gave you one perfect son and He made a mistake by making me. I’ve always known I could never be like Abel. I don’t talk and act like him. I have a lot of anger inside me. Sometimes all I want to do is hurt him for being so perfect. I hate myself for feeling so worthless around him.” “Son, God loves us all the same. He doesn’t love Abel more because he is maybe more mild-mannered than you. He loves both of you equally. He appreciates the strengths of both of you and understands your weaknesses too.” “But Mom, the big sacrifice is coming up tomorrow and I’m afraid of what might happen.” “Why would you say that?” “What if God doesn’t like what I give Him?” “Son, just give God your best. That’s all He asks of you.” Cain nodded his head and sighed. I didn’t know
