Metro Spirit 11.08.2012

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EVENTS CALENDAR JENNY IS WRIGHT ART45

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SLAB MATT’S MUSIC SIGHTINGS

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THE8 WHINE LINE

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Contributors ributors James Jamees Allen|Greg Baker|Rob Baker er|Rob Brezsny|Sam am Eifling |Matt Lane Lane|Austin ne|Austin Rhodes|Jo Rhodes|Josh Josh Ruffin|Andy Sto Stokes|Matt tokes|Matt Stone|Je Stone|Jenny Jenny Wright

INSIDER RUFFIN’ IT AUSTIN RHODES

Metro Spirit piritt is a free nnewspaper published publisheed weekly on Thursday, Thursd sday, 52 weeks a yea year. ar. Editorial coverage ge includes local issues issu sues and news, arts, s, entertainment, peo people, eople, places and apppear views from ac cross the political and an social spectrum.. The views do not necessarily n represen ent the views of thee ppublisher. Visit us at metrospirit.com.Š events. In our paper appear across represent Publisher: Joe White. e. Legal: Phillip Scotttt Hibbard. Reproduc ction or use without ut permission is proh hibited. One copy per peer person, please. 15 House, LLC. Owner/Pu Owner/Publisher: Reproduction prohibited.

CONTENTS

COVER DESIGN: KRUHU

EricJohnson|news editor eric@themetrospirit.com

GabrielVega|lead designer gabe@themetrospirit.com

BrendaCarter|senior account executive brenda@themetrospirit.com

AmyChristian|arts editor/production director amy@themetrospirit.com

JoeWhite|publisher joe@themetrospirit.com

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Michael-RKQVRQ_VLJKWLQJV ‡ Valerie(PHULFN_ZULWHU ‡ Amy3HUNLQV_HGLWRULDO LQWHUQ ‡ LauraPerry|volunteer

WHINELINE We’ve got people on television being paid to tell us that Bigfoot(s) exist without a nanoshred of evidence...and I’m the one that’s unemployed - Geez Louise! It seems all the people who are driving crazy, wreckless, and speeding on our roads are the people with the disability tags on their vehicles like DV, DP,

etc.... Its not always the young people or the people in a rush. The traffic police need to pay attention to them too. Do you really think someone who so stupidly misunderstands the meaning of the phrase “with bated breath� (think “waiting to exhale�) as to misspell the word right out in public for all the world to see is in any position to look down its ignorant nose at anyone else? Especially this

city’s entire population? And for caring about issues of some civic consequence? Go back to sleep, Mr./Ms. Insider. The one thing we Augustans, unlike the Metro Spirit, cannot be accused of is apathy. Quit telling me over and over to get the flu shot and that you are scheduling me for it! I have bad reactions to flu shots and refuse them, as is my right. Better the flu than

to land in the hospital, fool!

tracts at someone eone oor even in their bags when their hands We are in a sorry state if we are are full: Do you know you paid now encouraging young teenage to give me good recycling boys and girls to get treated material? I’m sure the printers with HIV prevention drugs. While will be thankful of your business abstinence will not work alone, as well. I could have given the there must be other means colorful pages to some kids besides drugging our kids with working on craft projects but a new drug we don’t know the I was afraid of polluting their side effects of for years. developing minds with junk if they were to read the stuff. To the religious people running around insisting on sticking (continued on page 38)

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Grand Vision: Azziz presents his plan to build “the next great American university� Merged Service: Budget issues force Columbia County to absorb fire department Opening Note: Music professors see potential in school merger for a music therapy program First Responder: A potential change in ambulance coverage has fire chief putting out fires A Pair of Aces: Classic rifles display the timelessness of a good design

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Independence

Recovery


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INSIDER@THEMETROSPIRIT.COM

SIDER

Slow Finish Poor Lee Anderson. The Grovetown Republican just couldn’t buy a break this time around, not that he seemed to be trying very hard. It’s pretty tough to sell yourself if you won’t open your mouth, and Anderson was so tight-lipped that even fellow Republicans seemed more than willing to thrown him under the tractor. Far more than willing. In fact, they seemed to do it downright gleefully. And then Gwen Fulcher Young’s Honey Boo Boo comment goes viral, the local Republican establishment gives up trying to defend him and for days the website for the Columbia County News Times linked its “Our Opinion” to a letter to the editor titled “Anderson will be more hindrance than help.” How’s that for hometown support? Like all Republicans, Anderson is a good Christian man, but you’ve got to figure he’s harboring some pretty Old Testament feelings toward his fellow right wingers right now.

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up

THUMBS

Insider is an anonymous, opinion-based examination of the hidden details of Augusta politics and personalities.

Dear Facebook: Will you please stop telling me what to do now that Election Day has come and gone?

down

We can only hope that Matt Lauer, as well as everyone else at NBC, was suitably embarrassed every time he uttered the phrase “Democracy Plaza.”

Lee Anderson

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Building the Dream With the exception of a few fiscally conservative Republicans who seem to balk at anything that’s not a purely essential duty of government, Columbia County likes to crow about itself, particularly the Columbia County government and most particularly the Development Services Division. Maybe it’s all those empty storefronts or maybe it’s the fact that Washington Road in Martinez still hasn’t managed to swim its way out of the undertow that seems to be pulling it back to Richmond County, but those Development Services folks sure do like to point out the good stuff. Take, for example, the heap of good stuff that makes up this year’s Community Pride Design Awards. Now in their third year, these awards are a way to show appreciation for the developers and project owners for their outstanding contributions to Columbia County’s quality of life. Best of all, though, the community gets to vote, sort of like Dancing with the Stars, only without the sequins and that randy guy on the end who can’t keep his butt in the chair. And the choices this year are just oh so Columbia County: the Shops at Riverwood, the Shops at Evans Exchange, the Gateway Verizon (damn right we can hear you now), the Advanced Auto Parts store on Washington Road and an office building so like every other office building that the letters of its name rearranged undoubtedly spell out a past nominee. Obviously, the Stake ‘N Shake is retro cool and the Tax Slayer building in Marshall Square deserves accolades for any number of reasons (although certainly not for the umbrella tables on the roof, which totally screw up the sleek look of the thing) but, all in all, the awards seem like asking for a pat on the back for doing what you said you’d do.

Rick Allen

Poor Rick Local businessman Rick Allen, who failed to beat Grovetown farmer Lee Anderson in the Republican primary, reportedly has his entire campaign staff on retainer as he waits for his next window of opportunity to run for office. He might want to start the debate prep now, however. While his Campaign to Fix the Debt, a group that includes another campaign also ran (Martha Zollar), a power-stripped veteran state representative (Ben Harbin) and a freshman state senator (Josh McKoon), is a clumsy, but not ill-advised attempt to establish some conservative field credentials, he’s going to need plenty of time working on an explanation for his recent declaration that there are no poor people in this county.

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The Wasteland Why living in a swing state sucks I’m sitting in my living room, a space mostly dark, and lit solely by the dim, nearly sepia spotlights lording over the breakfast nook. The fact that they illuminate a five foot tall, four foot wide oil painting of what, as best I can decipher, a hook-nosed nun plodding head-down in the opposite direction of a sun with outstretched arms signifies, without a doubt, I don’t know what. What she walks toward, however, I can pin down: what lies just beyond the frame. For her, nothingness. But better than something that burns so violently, so oppressively there. I sympathize. I’m ready as well to move on from storms and spin, from the poison of high rhetoric combined with bafflingly lacking morals. Anything would be better than this. What’s “this?” Swing state hell is “this.” I lived in Georgia for a combined 21 years of my life. I voted in two presidential elections in that state, and knew full well that each time I was practically throwing my vote away, electorally speaking. I voted for Kerry in 2004, for much the same reason I would sooner eat wilting kale than rotting meat. I voted for Obama in 2008, for much the same reason I would vote for a candidate that didn’t sell his soul to a core group of slobbering maniacs with hate-boners for welfare. I voted for him again this week, motivation unaltered. The 2008 election was especially jarring, in a cultural sense, because I encountered both opposite ends of the enemy gamut. On the GCSU campus, conservative groups barged onto the quad distributing leaflets of aborted fetuses, the protesters themselves adorned with placards emblazoning now-President Obama’s visage, a circle and diagonal line bisecting his face. An Obama presidency, we were to believe, would give you lung cancer. Or something. I had my own hate-boner to deal with. The narrative of the crazed social conservative, focused solely on lording over what people do with their genitals, holds some water. These are not isolated incidents, and if you don’t think these individuals are ubiquitous, you’re probably both one of them and in denial about it.

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And there’s the other group as well, a more moderate GOP collective, or at least one smart enough to not constantly carpet-bomb bystanders with inflammatory rhetoric and spittle. If you’re one of these people, you voted for Romney because you either A) truly don’t know any better, or B) you hate women and poor people. But at least you’re nice about it. Because Georgia is about 15 percent the first group, 35 percent the second group, and 50 percent disenfranchised minorities, most nationwide political campaigns don’t trouble themselves with more than a handful of visits. And any ads that do run there serve — as is increasingly becoming the case for the rest of the country — as head-swelling, navelgazing political porn that serves to do little more than inflate a voter’s sense of entitlement. Hence, minus the placard warriors and those liberals dumb enough to try and engage them in a serious rhetorical argument, the relative calm. Wisconsin is a different beast, and not just because I was already scraping frost off of my car in October. Though Obama was projected to, and did, win it by a comparatively comfortable margin, it was close enough throughout election season to warrant its swing-state designation. And that means that we, with slightly less the same frequency and intensity as Ohio, get positively laid waste to by political ads. For the past two months, I haven’t been able to open our mailbox without flyers and postcards espousing the virtues or denouncing the peccadilloes/crimes against humanity of Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, Tommy Thompson and Tammy Baldwin avalanching out. I know how I’m voting, so every one of these goes right into the conveniently placed recycling bin in the lobby of our building. Of course it blankets all methods of communication. Pop-up ads, every other television commercial, full-size newspaper ads, billboards, etc. My fiancee’s parents don’t even pick up their home phone anymore unless they know exactly who it is — it’s likely a robo-call. The other day, we were watching episodes of something on Hulu, enduring even more political commercials. And even when we clicked “No” when asked if the ad

was applicable to us, the best we could do was skip right to the next one. “The Walking Dead,” which we were watching at the time, seemed downright Disney by comparison. This state and others — surely, due to CNN’s pie chart fetish, you know them by now — are in turn lionized and vilified by public and punditry alike for their swing-state designation, for the subsequent hogging of the national spotlight in the weeks and months leading up to the actual election. Poor Georgia. Poor Montana. Poor Dakota. It sounds like a litany of murmured sympathies directed at the runners-up of a small town beauty pageant. By the time you read this, Barack Obama will have again been declared President of the United States, and Republicans will be saying all sorts of hilarious things I can ridicule them for. In real time, though — my now — I am tired. Sweet Georgia, sweet Montana, Dakota. You do not know how lucky you are. For in the arid desert of election season, a mirage, our shimmering desires, ends up being exactly what we want it to be: nothingness. A merciful, merciful, void.

JOSHRUFFIN, a Metro Spirit alum, is a published

journalist and poet who just received his MFA from Georgia College & State University. He was once the most un-intimidating bouncer at Soul Bar.

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Our American Dream: Representation Without Taxation? My Tuesday evening deadline has once again killed my ability to pontificate on the results of the big contests, but I guarantee you one thing: In these parts the overachievers concentrated their votes with conservative candidates, and the folks who have largely accepted a permanent place in society’s charity line stuck with the liberals. I predicted such would be the case in an exchange the other day with a caller to my afternoon radio show. I made a definitive statement, fairly straightforward, certainly with little wiggle room for interpretation. The caller asked whether I made the comment to get a laugh from the audience, to light up the phone lines or to outrage the population in general. Of course I made the statement, because the statement is true. Here it is: When examining CSRA voter trends there is distinct and direct proof that “left of center” causes and candidates are overwhelmingly supported by voters in poor and depressed neighborhoods, conversely, “right of center causes” and candidates are overwhelmingly supported by voters in affluent neighborhoods. That is the statement suitable for textbook publication. Water cooler conversationalists would likely put it this way: In our area, smart achievers vote conservative, poor dullards vote liberal. The truth, much like my own reflection in the mirror, can hurt, but the truth is the truth. Now, there are notable exceptions that make the above statement far from being absolute. But we are not talking individual exceptions, we are talking neighborhood trends. The caller was incredulous, and quite put off that I refused to back down from the assertion. What troubled him more was my challenge. He stated doubt about my theory, and to show him my faith in the statement, I bet him $5,000 in cash that my statement was provable. He didn’t take the bet. He then asked me why, in my mind, the trend was true. Very simple answer there: Achievers want someone who will look after their interests, underachievers want the same thing. Conservatives believe achievers should keep as much of their hard-earned money as possible. Many underachievers participate in government benefits (food stamps, Medicaid, etc.) that are funded by the achievers dollars. Liberals seek to make access to those benefits as easily and painlessly as possible. Conservatives want a tough justice system, because often, it is their wealth and safe being that is threatened by the criminal element. Liberals want a forgiving justice system, because so many of their own end up being prosecuted by it. While it is clear that the local voter trends run just as I describe them, there are pockets of “liberal achievers,” particularly in the West and Northeast, that buck our backyard example. But take a look at some of these areas: San Francisco, Boston, Washington, D.C., etc., and

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you will find confiscatory tax rates and crime problems that are quickly sending those who can afford to move, out of the city proper. Down south the trend in the city of Atlanta has gone much the same direction. The disturbing reality that many conservatives face is that those on the opposite end of the spectrum are beginning to out number us. One man, one vote means that the magna cum laude CEO of a Fortune 500 company has the same weight at the polls as an unemployed crack addict. As many in the aforementioned cities have learned, when the underachievers, and their misguided “limousine liberal” buddies learn that they can assemble in numbers strong enough to control the local, state and federal governments, we are all in very deep trouble. The central controlling document of this nation is the Constitution. Isn’t it interesting that our forefathers, who seemed to be so brilliant in so many other capacities (free speech, separation of church and state, state’s rights, etc.), initially only gave white male property owners the right to vote? While I will be the first to say that being white and male gives absolutely no advantage intellectually (as my wife often reminds me), back in the day when the Constitution was written, property ownership was a fairly decent litmus test of intellectual wherewithal. These days, property ownership is not at all indicative of intelligence or work ethic. However, income certainly is. Perhaps the best way to insure our country does make the right decisions for future and security is to award voting power based on the taxes we pay. Talk show host Neal Boortz has been pushing this idea for years, and I gotta tell you, it sounds pretty damn good. Everyone gets one vote, for state, local, federal elections, then you are awarded additional votes based on the amount of taxes you pay. The more money you surrender to the government, the more say you have in how it is run. Stockholders who make the most investment have more say in the way a company is operated. Conversely, those who make little financial contribution have little or nothing to lose if the company falters. Why should the people with nothing to lose be in a position to make major decisions for the achievers? In my opinion, they shouldn’t be in that position. Until the breadwinners in this country take back the government and society in general, we are going to be at the mercy of leaders who can easily be compared to spoiled teenagers driving daddy’s expensive car. They didn’t pay for it, they don’t AUSTINRHODES have to pay to take care of it, and they really don’t care if they The views expressed are the opinions of Austin Rhodes and drive it straight into a brick wall. do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

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ERICJOHNSON

Merged Service

Budget issues force Columbia County to absorb fire department

Thanks to a dramatic increase in workers compensation insurance, Columbia County’s privately operated fire service, MartinezColumbia Fire Rescue, will likely merge with county government. Talks of the merger began shortly after MartinezColumbia Chief Doug Cooper received word of the insurance increase. “The chief talked to me about what they were going to need for workers comp, and I said we really couldn’t do that,” said Administrator Scott Johnson. “We’ve already levied the taxes and there’s really not a funding source, and I didn’t want to go back to the general fund and fund that difference, so I just asked the commission for permission to explore the possibility of a merger.” The commission gave him the okay to do that, and now Johnson is in the process of putting together a transition team. “We will all meet weekly to talk about it, and once we work out all the details, we’ll take all those details to the commission for a vote,” Johnson said. Johnson said that Martinez-Columbia Fire Rescue had budgeted roughly $385,000 for workers compensation last year, and the quotes they were getting indicated it was going to go up to almost a million dollars. When the county started looking at what it would cost for 8

METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

workers compensation if the firefighters were county employees, that number fell to somewhere around $100,000. “They were budgeting $385,000 and we’re going to pay $100,000,” Johnson said. “And if we’re already paying the $385,000, we’re showing a $285,000 savings a year right off the bat. At $1 million, you’re looking at $900,000 a year in savings by them becoming county employees. County fire service has evolved greatly over the years. The Martinez Fire Department came into existence as a private fire company in the 1950s, and in order to provide comprehensive fire coverage to the growing county, county officials contracted with the department to cover the entire county. For doing that, the county eventually levied a millage rate specifically for fire service, replacing the subscription fees that were not always easy to collect. “During that time, we’ve been building fire stations with county dollars and the county ended up owning more and more equipment,” Johnson said. According to Emergency and Operations Director Pam Tucker, who oversees the fire service for the county, there are 15 staffed fire stations in the county. Given the unexpected stresses such insurance increases place on the budget, Tucker agreed that the deal makes sense. “Every year we can’t look at those kinds of threats,” she said. “We need to get them into our system.”

Johnson hopes to get the deal done by January 1. “We’ve got some things to work out, but I think at the end of the day it’s going to be beneficial for the citizens,” he said. “I think we’ll end up showing a savings over the long run, and the service will be the same, and as we grow it will continue to get better. It’s one of those situations where, at the end of the day, it’s just really going to work out in everyone’s best interest.” Though he admitted the transition team has a difficult task ahead of them, he said that in spite of the challenges, the team will work hard to ease any apprehensions the firefighters might have. “We feel like there’s a good structure in place,” he said. “We want to bring them over at the same rank and we want to bring them over with the same tenure and certainly at the same salary.” The move comes at a time when many are leery about increasing the role of government, but Johnson insists that adding the additional personnel isn’t as imposing as it might seem. “The firefighters are going to become county employees with county benefits, and the county’s having to take on a good amount of additional employees,” he admitted. “However, we were already providing them with a labor contract, so the money’s already been budgeted. It’s not as if we’re expanding government with no way to pay for it.”

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ERICJOHNSON

Opening Note

Music professors see potential in school merger for a music therapy program only the faculty, but the resources and programs they have, not to mention to have a clinical site, because that’s a huge portion.” Though they have yet to settle on the specifics of a curriculum, music therapy students would spend a significant amount of time paired with a music therapist mentor in a clinical setting the way student teachers spend time with teachers in a school setting. “We’ve been in contact with the cancer center downtown and we’ve talked with the director of the experimental therapeutics program,” Crookall says. “He is interested in incorporating music in different experiments and trials to see how it affects the palliative care of patients.” Crookall, who teaches music history, believes western society is just scratching the surface of holistic medicine. “The ancient Greeks and Romans truly believed that Hall says. “We’re going to have music therapists there, so there was a set of musical notes in different modes that would enhance a citizen’s well-being and how they questions we can’t answer, they could answer directly.” contributed to society,” she says. “They also believed that A music therapist is a healthcare professional that diagnoses and treats patients using music, typically those there were certain notes that you could play or sing that could make you a bad person.” with mental, social, physical or cognitive difficulties. After receiving public input, they will submit the “It’s opening up a level of communication where, proposal to the chair of the department, who will then in some patients, they would not have had an outlet,” Crookall says. “There has been a lot of dramatic footage submit it to the dean of the college. “From there, I guess it goes up the ranks through taken of Alzheimer’s patients who were, for lack of a better word, catatonic until they started to hear music, at provost and then eventually the Board of Regents, who will have the final say,” says Hall. which point they started signing along, tapping their feet Currently, ASU offers a bachelors of music education, or becoming otherwise ‘alive’ again.” a bachelor of arts, which is more of a liberal arts degree, According to Crookall, music accesses parts of the and bachelor of performance. brain that can’t be accessed any other way. “All of them have the same core classes, and then you “For people with autism spectrum disorders, music gives them an outlet for communication and just a way of just kind of specialize in your third and fourth year,” Crookall says. connecting,” she says. In addition to the therapy-related classes, students As a music teacher, Hall witnessed the surprising power would take courses in guitar, piano and percussion, the of music first-hand. “I had a student in fifth grade who was one of our lead three major instruments used in music therapy, and then head out in the field. characters, and I didn’t even know he had a stuttering Though music therapy isn’t necessarily a common field issue until after the fact,” she says. “As long as he was of study — there are only two other programs in the state, singing, he didn’t stutter once.” UGA and Georgia College in Milledgeville — it has the The growing association with GHSU is advantageous, potential to be a growing field, and ASU is interested in since most of the best music therapy programs have a getting in at the ground floor. close connection to a medical institution. “We could be a really powerful force and a leading “It was just a logical progression, since we now have school in this degree area because of the strength of access to this amazing health sciences university,” says GHSU and the strength that we have,” Hall says. Crookall. “It’s extremely beneficial to be able to use not Dr. Christine Crookall and Dr. Suzanne Hall

While many at Augusta State University were alarmed or even frightened when the word got out about the merger of ASU and Georgia Health Sciences University, it didn’t take those in the music department long to identify a potential opportunity. “I think we were all very excited that it could only enhance the music program,” says Dr. Christine Crookall, associate professor of music. “Once the merger was announced, we were talking the next day about a music therapy program.” Now, several months later, that music therapy program is inching closer to realization. “Right now we’re in the process of gathering information about the degree and about the field as a whole,” says Dr. Suzanne Hall, assistant professor music education. “We’re in the middle of identifying interest in the program, and we want to know what the community thinks.” The community will have the opportunity to give their opinions about the proposed new program at a forum on Saturday, November 10, at 2:30 p.m. at the Fine Arts Building next to the Maxwell Performing Arts Center on the campus of ASU. “This is for anyone who’s interested in the field itself,”

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WHAT THE …

By Michael Sharp and Caleb Madison / Edited by Will Shortz 98 Big bygone bird 99 ___ Kong 101 Mad scientist’s sadistic exclamation upon attacking the Empire State? 106 “Popsicle,” in “Fifty Shades of Grey,” for one 110 Anatomical ring 111 Like a 12-Down 112 First-floor apartment, maybe 113 Rake 115 Ain’t correct? 116 Canon fodder? 117 Prime minister of 1945 119 What the Grim Reaper’s backup carries? 124 Evan-___ (women’s clothing brand) 125 Its alphabet has 44 consonants 126 Log time 127 Sailors’ saint 128 Ends of Alaska? 129 Farm females 130 Macho man 131 1,000 years before the coronation of Queen Elizabeth I

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Recognize as a source Cry on arrival Big wheel at a reception? Snide response Smithereens Red Wing or Blackhawk Cold temps Bijou “___ #1!” Carnival Cruise Lines stop Go over again Christine ___, “The Phantom of the Opera” girl 58 Junk 62 Killed a hero? 64 Horne and Olin 66 It’s measured in cups 67 W.W. II craft: Abbr. 68 “Your Business” airer 69 Director Kurosawa 70 Family inheritance 72 Finish line, often 73 Together, in music 76 Hate coke? 79 “Dragnet” message, for short 82 Spring phenomenon 84 Winning by a small margin Down 86 Dirt spreader 1 Metric distance: Abbr. 87 Psalm starter 2 Author Levin 88 Unreliable 3 Summer recreation area 90 Suppose, to Shakespeare 4 Ready to mate 91 They’re often toasted 5 Confederate 92 Cornell who founded Western 6 Genteel gathering Union 7 Tasks around the house 94 Off-campus local 8 Web site with a “Send Money” tab 97 Really sing 9 Psychologist Jean 100 Miracle-___ 10 P.R. hours 102 It might cause photophobia 11 First name in Chicago politics 103 “One World” musician John 12 Weenie 104 Flatters 13 Coach for dancing? 105 Hollered 14 Wall St. opening 106 Wet bars? 15 “If you don’t like my anger, do 107 Prankster-like something about it!”? 108 “Get on the stick!”? 16 Black in country music 109 Tidies up, in a way 17 Vote in 114 Come back 18 Results of lying too much? 116 Durst of Limp Bizkit 24 Involve 118 Disney doe 25 ___ Johnston, former fiancé of 120 Deviate from the course Bristol Palin 121 Bird ___ 30 London facilities 122 Owner of Abbey Road Studios 32 Replacement refs, maybe? 123 Babe 33 “The Taming of the Shrew” setting 34 Backbeat component, often 35 Drink to throw back

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PREVIOUSPUZZLEANSWERS

Across 1 Auckland native 5 Surmounting 9 Dude ranch handle 13 Sign of sensitivity? 19 Setting for the 2012 film “Argo” 20 Title partner of “the Swan” in a Yeats poem 21 “___ Her Standing There” 22 Creed of the “Rocky” series 23 “Come on, woman, shape that wood!”? 26 Brighter 27 Start of a choosing rhyme 28 Uploaded pic, often 29 Go weak in the knees 31 In the past 32 Jack ___ 34 Dry white wines 36 Some protests 38 Cheerful superhero? 41 Facts of life? 42 Oklahoma birthplace of Oral Roberts 43 “___ surprised as you are!” 44 Cases for E.M.T.’s 46 Onetime U.N. leader 50 Guard dog’s target 52 Take a patient approach to revenge? 56 Benefit 57 Abandon 59 “Mamma ___!” 60 Sleeper agent 61 Sallie ___ 63 Barbaric 65 Some electrical workers 68 Stand offering, briefly 71 Ones who stop giving to their church? 74 Future grads: Abbr. 75 Emaciated 77 “Hoarders” airer 78 ___ loss 80 Hombre, formerly 81 Everyone’s bets 83 Ford sedan 85 T.A.’s overseer 89 Softly exhale cheap sentiment? 93 Tenacious sort 95 San Antonio mayor Julián, keynote speaker at the 2012 Democratic convention 96 1978-79 CBS detective drama 97 Fool

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8NOVEMBER2012

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ERICJOHNSON

First Responder

A potential change in ambulance coverage has fire chief putting out fires

Though Gold Cross EMS announced the withdrawal of its request to become the primary provider for ambulance service in Richmond County on Monday, November 5, effectively ending a contentious week of meetings and maneuvering, Richmond County Fire Chief Chris James remained adamant about the threat the move posed for the city. “I think that local governments should be the primary providers, and they should subcontract the service out,” he said. Currently, Richmond County and Gold Cross are co-providers, which allows the city to control the calls and subcontract to Gold Cross. James feared that if Gold Cross were given primary provider designation, the city would lose control over the ambulance service. With a contract, Richmond County sets the standards of service, but without a contract, those standards are left to the state, which doesn’t classify much more than the definition of an ambulance and the levels of certification

12 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

riding on that apparatus, that would equal about $210,000 in salary, plus the $5,000 for the ambulance license that you have to pay the state every year,” James said. “So at the end, I’m going to be somewhere around $250,000 a year for an ambulance that I can not roll.” In other words, being reduced to a secondary provider would have cost the city its license, because the city would be unwilling to spend $250,000 for something it couldn’t use. And once a community loses its license, it rarely gets it back. In 1997, Columbia County decided to privatize its ambulance service, and according to Emergency and Operations Director Pam Tucker, she’s still getting notices from lawyers about lawsuits from back then. She said giving up the ambulance was a way of saying goodbye to the liability. “The county relinquished its license back to the state because we privatized,” she said. “The cost was somewhere around $3 million a year at that time, and we privatized and initially we paid $400,000.” After adding the Furys Ferry Road ambulance, the cost went up to $500,000 a year. Tucker is about to renew the you need for certain designations. contract for the same price, and she said she’s happy with “But they don’t stipulate things such as response times, the arrangement she has with Gold Cross. the number of ambulances you have to have available “We have our medical first responders with our fire and what you can charge,” James said. department,” she said. “They run all life-threatening If a private company had the zone and a private citizen calls, so this is just a real good mix to be sure that the complained to one of their local commissioners, there emergency medical needs of our citizens are well taken would be nothing the commissioner could do, according care of.” to James. Instead, they’d have to file their complaint at a Gold Cross runs five ambulances in Columbia higher level. County, though they have mutual aid agreements with That’s because in the complicated structure that neighboring counties that allows them to divert them if governs ambulance service, whoever the state declares to needed. be the sole provider controls who gets the calls. If Gold Tucker said each county has to find out what works for Cross were given that designation outright as they initially them. requested, they would have controlled the dispatch of “Some people like to have that hands-on control, but ambulances and the city, which is required to continually our relationship between the service and the county — have at least one ambulance staffed an on call in order you really can’t tell much difference that they’re not a to maintain its license, would likely never receive a call, part of our system.” at which point it would be cost prohibitive to keep the To James and Administrator Fred Russell, that control license. was worth fighting for. Currently, the city staffs one ambulance, which runs all “Even if we were willing to spend the $250,000 to keep of the medical calls out of Station 13 on Lumpkin Road. our license, if we were reduced to being a secondary “If I take one ambulance and I take a salary of $35,000, provider, you could have a heart attack two doors down one of the lowest salaries on the Fire Department, and the street from that station and you could not respond I’ve got three shifts of two firefighter EMTs per shift unless Gold Cross said you could respond.”

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ERICJOHNSON

A Pair of Aces

Classic rifles display the timelessness of a good design

The pair of Winchester model 1894 rifles sitting in the Friedman’s showroom, one built in 1918, the other a new out of the box version from 1994, is a perfect example of how an inspired design can defy the ages. Though 76 years and some five million manufactured units separate the two, the guns are virtually identical. “They just kept on producing them and producing them and producing them,” says Friedman’s firearms expert Chris Leopard. “According to the Blue Book of Gun Values, the model 1894 Winchester is the World’s most popular rifle, and like the Colt 1911 (featured in last week’s issue), it has been copied by other manufacturers, mainly the Marlin 30-30.” Leopard says you could lay the Marlin next to either of the two Winchesters and they would look almost identical. So identical, in fact, that you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference without looking at the manufacturer. “That was a very popular gun in the 1970s for a first rifle to hunt deer with,” Leopard says. “To a lot of people I talk to in my generation, that was what they used to deer hunt with. That was just the gun of choice.” Leopard himself killed his first deer with a 30-30 Marlin. The reputation of the model 1894 lies in large part with 30-30 Winchester cartridge, a very popular deer cartridge that’s still used today. A lever action rifle, the cartridges were loaded individually from the side of the receiver, where they entered the tube magazine. When you worked the lever, it pulled one from the tube and loaded one in the chamber. Not all model 1894s use 30-30 Winchester cartridges, however. Though certainly the most popular version, Winchester made versions that would shoot five different cartridges, including shorter pistol cartridges, which would have filled the tube with more rounds of ammunition, making it perfect for those straight shooting western heroes. Even after nearly 80 years, the only real change to the gun is the addition of another safety to the newer rifle. Otherwise, the only difference is the saddle ring seen on the older version. The saddle ring was developed for cavalry soldiers, who wore a wide leather belt over their shoulder and across their body called a carbine sling. A spring-loaded snap link would then attach to the rifle at the saddle ring. “If they didn’t need the rifle, they could stick it in the scabbard, which was usually on the side of the saddle,” Leopard says. “But if they were in a combat situation, they could let it hang to the side and access it quickly if they needed to.” Though Leopard only graded the older gun at 60 to 70 percent and the newer gun, which had been owned by a collector and was never shot, was basically mint condition, the older gun’s age and historical value make it worth nearly twice what the newer model is. “Though you can buy the exact same gun brand new off the shelf, there’s a real market for older guns,” Leopard says. “That’s what drives the prices up.” Leopard appraised the older gun at $1,400, while the 1994 version, now 18 years old, he appraised at about $700. 8NOVEMBER2012

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ERICJOHNSON

Grand Vision

Azziz presents his plan to build “the next great American university”

While avoiding specific references to the controversial name change that has overshadowed just about every other aspect of the merger of Georgia Health Sciences University and Augusta State University since the Georgia Regents University name was selected in August, Dr. Ricardo Azziz used his annual State of the Enterprise address to outline an ambitious agenda that he hopes will make the merged institution the “next great American university.” Coming shortly after the naming compromise that tagged Augusta on the end of Georgia Regents University, thereby saving the A no matter how diluted the form, the address declared Azziz’s vision for the new enterprise, which will start out with nearly 10,000 students spread across nine colleges and schools, have more than 1,000 faculty members, 650 acres of campus and almost $2.5 billion in direct economic impact. 14 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

While outlining some of the things that have kept Georgia Health Sciences University from being known as anything more than “a medical school or a highlevel tech school for health professionals” — things like a siloed structure that limited collaboration across departments and the fact that it was a standalone health sciences university — Azziz used most of the speech to look ahead, almost as if, with the naming hurdle finally

cleared, his vision could once again command center stage. “Some of you may rightfully be asking, ‘Why consolidate ASU and GHSU,’ and I can only respond, because long-term, it’s the right thing,” he said. “No matter the discomfort and angst we experience today, it’s the right thing for our students, who will have improved offerings in degrees, in experiences and in infrastructure, and it’s the right thing for our faculty, who will have greater opportunities for collaborative research and professional development.” The comprehensive research university Azziz intends to create is a long way from the mission cultivated by former ASU President Dr. William Bloodworth during his 19-year tenure. In an interview with the Metro Spirit just before his May retirement, Bloodworth described a school far from the destination institution Azziz desires to bring to life. “It’s been a place where the internal academic standards are actually high,” he said, “but the external standards for admission are not high, so it’s been a place that has created an opportunity for a lot of people to go to college or try to go to college. And it’s been my view over the years that that is a good thing.” Bloodworth spoke warmly of the flowering of the next generation that occurred because ASU was a college where not everyone made it out with a degree. “You’ve got people who come to schools like this who were not born to come to school, who may come from backgrounds with very little exposure to higher education,” Bloodworth said. “A lot of those people do not do well starting out. Sometimes, they come back and sometimes their children come back, but it’s still a benefit.” In contrast, Azziz’s plan would fundamentally change the groundwork Bloodworth laid and so many alumni seem to hold dear, transforming the small commuter university into something far larger, a school that will look beyond the local population in order to become an institution with a six-year graduation rate exceeding 75 percent with a 95 percent employment rate. Such growth, he said, will not come easily, particularly in light of recent cuts to higher education. While criticism over the Georgia Regents University name, 8NOVEMBER2012


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particularly the perception that it was placating the governing body, has been harsh, Azziz focused on the need to stand alone because of the state’s dwindling financial influence. “We were over-dependent on state support, particularly for capital projects and education, resulting in investments determined primarily by state politics or tax revenues rather than an overarching strategic plan, an inadequate focus on entrepreneurship, limited philanthropic efforts and chronic underinvestment in our facilities,” he said. “In fact, much of the lack of emphasis on philanthropy stemmed from the mistaken perception that because we receive state appropriations we are fully state-supported.” State funds only support 23 percent of the university’s budget. In addition, he said there was a lack of understanding about the university’s value to the community. “We have experienced limited tangible local support of our health sciences university and our health system,” he said. “Some in our community are not yet ready or prepared to embrace and accept a strong and growing university in their midst, nor do they fully comprehend that their success and future, and that of the city, is intimately tied to how well the university does.” In spite of $600 million in decreased revenues and unfunded costs and $225 million in state appropriation reductions, Azziz vowed to address the fact that some staff and faculty haven’t received a pay raise in over four years. Most surprising, however, was his articulated vision for 2030, which included a student body double what it is today, a “Top 50” ranked medical school, 800 acres of university campus in Augusta, Division I sports and a new sports complex, and at least eight regional campuses throughout the state, including an Atlanta campus, which he insisted was vital to the school’s growth and stature. “All research universities in Georgia, including UGA and Mercer, have campuses in Atlanta,” he said, “because metro Atlanta is home to more than half of Georgia’s population, because that’s where the state’s business is conducted and because, to paraphrase bank robber Willie Sutton, that’s where the money is.” Though his detailed, long-term blueprint to make the merged school a world-class institution undoubtedly failed to sway those skeptics convinced that Azziz’s ultimate goal has always been to move the entire enterprise out of Augusta, his stated commitment to grow in Augusta even as the school branches out across the state should give most Augustans a sigh of relief and possible a twinge of excitement. If Georgia Regents University Augusta reaches its 2030 destination, it won’t just transform the two schools it started with, it will completely transform the city as well. 8NOVEMBER2012

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GREGORY A. BAKER, PH.D

Killer Robots

Technology makes you wonder about our government So your hero sits here on Tuesday afternoon surfing the web for the latest election predictions. “I’m sick of this… enough with the election already… what’s going on in the tech world?” Ironically, the headline at wired.com strikes at probably one of the most important side issues of the election and one of the strongest statements about how our society has lost touch with liberty: “Seven Technologies That Will Make It Easier for the Next President to Hunt and Kill You.” The all-powerful tyrant. The plot line is probably the most common in science fiction. Darth Vader, the Goa’uld, the Borg, Sky Net… the list goes on and on. Each of these tyrannies possessed tools of unimaginable power to intimidate and subdue their subjects. Take for instance the automated robot assassin, aka the Terminator. You just plug in your target and stand back. The nice thing about killer robots is that there’s no need to risk a life during the process of suppressing your adversary. It allows the tyrant to kill with impunity. The obstacle is removed, and you don’t have to worry about the mess. You know, kind of like we’re doing in Afghanistan and Pakistan with our drone program. Of course, I always thought the hardships of war (“the mess”) discouraged folks from seeking conflict. But what do I know… Another great sci-fi tool used by the tyrant is the tracking device. By now, we all know that the Empire tracked the Millennium Falcon to the hidden rebel base on Yavin Four. It’s incredible that a device could be created that allowed the Empire to track a ship through hyperspace, yet remain undetectable to those on board. Or perhaps, the Empire figured out how to track a signal inherent with the operation of a starship. If that were the case, the all-powerful tyrant would certainly have a way to keep track of individual locations. They would even be able to determine when a gathering starts to form, and take measures to keep the crowd under control. Hold on… Excuse me a second, my cell phone is ringing… I’m guess that you are catching on by now. The reality is that the technological tools used by science fiction tyrants exist today. What is more worrisome, the political leadership of both parties seems more than willing to use these tools in an oppressive manner. An example. The government, through the NSA and warrantless wiretaps, routinely collects and processes information on Americans. (BTW — If you haven’t read the Wired article on the NSA data center program, you’ll be amazed. Google “wired nsa data center augusta.”) Don’t even think about challenging the program; after about four years in the courts, last week the Supreme Court finally heard arguments in the case. The arguments were not over the constitutionality of the surveillance. The arguments were simply over whether citizens had a legal standing to challenge the law. Our government’s story goes something like this: Warrantless wiretapping is a Top Secret program. The plaintiff cannot prove that their communications were monitored, ergo, the plaintiff cannot prove harm. Case dismissed. Is this the language of a government working for the people, dedicated to the principal of individual liberty? Or is this the language of a tyrant with a lot of cool technology trying to grow his power over his subjects? Another story line from science fiction comes into play. Against the oppression of the all-powerful tyrant, a hero always rises. Whether it’s Luke Skywalker, Neo, John Conner or the like, the force of good is always aligned with freedom and liberty, and pretty much always wins. Superman fought for truth, justice and the American way. That sounds like the team for me. Until next time, I’m off the grid @gregory_a_baker. GREGORY A. BAKER, PH.D, is vice president and chief rocket scientist for CMA, which provides information technology services to CSRA businesses and nonprofits.

8NOVEMBER2012

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R.U.N.E ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED

The Song Remains the Same The song may, but the members of Led Zeppelin won’t look anything like this during an encore screening of Celebration Day, their 2007 reunion concert. That’s okay, though. It’s even okay that Jason Bonham is filling in for his late father John on drums. Why? Because when else are you going to be able to see and hear more than two hours of classics, from “Black Dog” to “Kashmir?” The band says no more reunions, so the answer is nowhere by the Regal Cinema this Tuesday. Led Zeppelin’s Celebration Day Regal Augusta Exchange 20 Tuesday, November 13 | 7:30 p.m. | regmovies.com


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Veterans Day is Sunday, November 11, but there are tons of ways to thank and remember those who have served our country all weekend, beginning with the Annual Veterans Concert, presented by the North Augusta Cultural Arts Council on Thursday, November 8, at 7:30 p.m. in the Wesley Center of Grace United Methodist Church. On Friday, November 9, at 7:30 p.m. at the Jabez Sanford Hardin Performing Arts Center in Evans is War Bonds: The Songs and Letters of World War II, a presentation of Augusta Amusements featuring David zum Brunnen and Serena Ebhardt, and on Saturday, November 10, from 6-8 p.m. is the Red, White & Blue Veterans Day Celebration at Evans Towne Center Park. Last but certainly not least is the 2012 CSRA-Augusta Veterans Day Parade on Monday, November 12, at 10 a.m., beginning at Sacred Heart Cultural Center and ending at the All Wars Monument at Broad and 4th streets where a ceremony will be held at 11 a.m. For more information on these events, see the events calendar.

ENTERTAIN

ME

Arts

The Wanderer Project, part of the Art at Lunch series, is Friday, November 9, at noon at the Morris Museum of Art and features writer/archeologist Dr. Mark Newell and genealogical/archival researcher April Hayes. Includes lunch by Roux’s Catering. $10, members; $14, non-members. Preregistration required. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org. Senn Designs jewelry trunk show is Saturday, November 10, from 10 a.m.5 p.m. and Sunday, November 11, from noon-5 p.m. at the Morris Museum of Art. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org. Art After Dark is Saturday, November 10, at 7 p.m. at the Church of the Holy Comforter. The Artists’ Guild of Columbia County event includes an art show, silent auction, celebrity art auction and more. Free. Visit artistguildcc.org. Images of the Amazon and Galapagos Islands, a presentation by Aiken photographer Forrest Roberts, is Tuesday, November 13, from 7-8 p.m. at Birds & Butterflies. $5; pre-registration required. Call 803-649-7999. Linoleum Printmaking/Holiday Cards Class, led by Mary How, is Thursday, November 15, at 5 p.m. at Gravatt Camp and Conference Center in Aiken. Participants should bring an image they would like to use for the card. $35 fee includes materials and light supper. Pre-registration required. Call 803648-1817 or visit bishopgravatt.org.

from Leonard Porkchop Zimmerman, Jay Jacobs, Jason Craig and many others, opens Friday, November 9, from 7-11 p.m. at Gaartdensity Gallery downtown and will remain up until Friday, December 7. Visit facebook.com/ gaartdensitygallery. Jetsam, works by Jay Jacobs, shows at the Morris Museum of Art. The exhibition opening is Tuesday, November 13, at 5:30 p.m. Free. Call 706724-7501 or visit themorris.org. Reflections on Water in American Painting shows at the Morris Museum of Art. The exhibition opening is Thursday, November 15, at 6 p.m. in which art collector Arthur Phelan discusses works included in the exhibition. A reception follow. Free, members; $5, non-members. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org. Annual Doll Exhibition shows through December 31 at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History. Free with museum admission. Call 706-7243576 or visit lucycraftlaneymuseum.com. Annual Quilt Exhibition shows through December 31 at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History. Pre-registration required. Call 706-7243576 or visit lucycraftlaneymuseum.com.

Cantus, presented by the Harry Jacobs Chamber Music Society as part of the ASU Lyceum Series, is Friday, November 9, at 7:30 p.m. at the Maxwell Theatre. $25, general public; $7, children. Call 706-667-4100 or visit aug.edu. War Bonds: The Songs and Letters of World War II, a presentation of Augusta Amusements featuring David zum Brunnen and Serena Ebhardt, is Friday, November 9, at 7:30 p.m. at the Jabez Sanford Hardin Performing Arts Center in Evans. $30-$35. Call 706-726-0366 or visit augustaamusements.com. Shaun Piazza performs Sunday, November 11, at 2 p.m. at the Morris Museum of Art as part of the Music at the Morris series. Free. Call 706724-7501 or visit themorris.org. John Rutter’s Requiem, performed by USC-Aiken’s Concert Choir, is Thursday, November 15, at 7:30 p.m. at the United Methodist Church in Aiken. $20. Call 803-641-3306 or email joels@usca.edu.

Literary

Author Visit, featuring Marsha Maurer, author of “Whatever is Lovely: Design for an Elegant Spirit,” is Saturday, November 10, from 3-4:30 p.m. at the Aiken Public Library. Call 803-642-2023 or visit abbe-lib.org.

City of Dust: Photographs by John Mulhouse shows through November 14 at the Headquarters Branch Library. Call 706-834-9742 or visit augustaphotofestival.org.

Maxwell Morning Book Club discusses Betty White’s “If You Ask Me (And Of Course You Won’t)” Thursday, November 15, at 10 a.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org.

Day of Art, hosted by the North Augusta Artists Guild, is each Tuesday from 11 a.m.-3 p.m. at the Arts and Heritage Center and includes a group of artists painting in the center who will answer questions or allow visitors to join in. Call 803-441-4380 or visit artsandheritagecenter.com.

Portraits of Southern Artists by Jerry Siegel shows through December 2 at the Morris Museum of Art. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org.

Brown Bag Book Discussion, featuring “Stealing Mona Lisa” by Carson Morton, is Thursday, November 15, at 11:30 a.m. at the Columbia County Library. Call 706-863-1946 or visit ecgrl.org.

Exhibitions

ASU Jazz Ensemble Concert is Thursday, November 8, at 7:30 p.m. at the Maxwell Theatre. $5. Call 706-667-4100 or visit aug.edu.

Lillie Morris, Lucy Weigle and Judy Avrett Exhibition shows at Sacred Heart Cultural Center through December 28. An opening reception will be held Thursday, November 8, from 5-7 p.m. Call 706-826-4700 or visit sacredheartaugusta.org. The PEACE (Poetic Expression and Creative Enlightenment) Show, a community gathering of area artists organized by billy s and including art 8NOVEMBER2012

Music

Annual Veterans Concert, presented by the North Augusta Cultural Arts Council is Thursday, November 8, at 7:30 p.m. in the Wesley Center of Grace United Methodist Church and features Savannah River Winds, Wycliffe Gordon and emcee Terry Sams. Visit naartscouncil.org.

Book Club discusses “Plum Pudding Murder” by Joanne Fluke on Thursday, November 15, at 4 p.m. at the Harlem Branch Library. Call 706-556-9795 or visit ecgrl.org. Nook tutorials at Barnes and Noble in the Augusta Mall are each Saturday beginning at noon, followed by a Nookcolor tutorial at 12:30 p.m. Free. Call 706-737-0012 or visit bn.com.

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Dance

Latin Dance Class is Sunday, November 11, from 8 a.m.-1 p.m. at the Shiloh Community Center. Call 706-738-0089 or email ej.shilohcommunitycenter@ gmail.com. Tango Night is every Thursday, 7-9:30 p.m., at Casa Blanca Cafe, 936 Broad Street. Call 706-504-3431 or visit casablancatime.com. Friday Dance, hosted by the Fraternal Order of Elks, 205 Elkdon Court in Martinez, is each Friday night in November from 8-11 p.m., with light snacks served from 7-8 and the dance, starting at 8 p.m., featuring DJ Joe Tutt playing shag, slow music and music to line dance to. $8. The third Friday is the Elks Dance, $35 per couple, which includes a full meal served from 7-8 p.m. and music by the Fun Time Band until 11 p.m. Call 706-860-3232.

Christian Singles Dance, a smoke-, alcohol- and drug-free event for those ages 40 and over, is each Saturday night at the Ballroom Dance Center in Evans. Dance lessons start at 7 p.m., and the dance begins at 8 p.m. No partners needed. $8, members; $10, guests. Visit christiandances.org. Belly Dance Class is every Tuesday at 6 p.m. at Euchee Creek Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-556-0594 or visit ecgrl.org. Augusta International Folk Dance Club meets Tuesday nights from 7:30-9:30 p.m. at the Augusta Ballet Studio on 2941 Walton Way. No partners needed. First visit free. Call 706-399-2477.

Theater

“Harvey,” a production of the Fort Gordon Dinner Theatre, shows November 9-10, 16-17, 30 and December 1, with

dinner at 7 p.m. and the show at 8 p.m. $30-$38. Call 706-793-8552 or visit fortgordon.com. Auditions for “Legally Blonde: The Musical,” a production of the Fort Gordon Dinner Theatre, are Monday-Tuesday, November 12-13, at 7 p.m. at the theater. The production shows in March of 2013, and the audition will require both singing and dancing. For more information, email Director Steven Walpert at steven.r.walpert.naf@mail.mil. Quickies, Le Chat Noir Theatre’s short play festival, is seeking original scripts by local authors. Writers must reside within the CSRA and scripts should be shorts of 5-15 pages and one-acts of 15-30 pages. Writers may submit up to three scripts. Submission deadline is December 31 for the festival, which will be held in April. Email scripts and a cover sheet with contact information to info@lcnaugusta.com.

Flix

“The Tempest Live,” a presentation of the Metropolitan Opera, is Saturday, November 10, at 12:55 p.m. at Regal Augusta Exchange Stadium 20. Visit regmovies.com. “The Horse Soldiers” and “Glory,” part of the Monday Veterans Movie Marathon showing in November, show Monday, November 12, from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. “We Have a Pope” shows Monday, November 12, at 7 p.m. at 170 University Hall as part of the ASU Film Series. $3. Call 706-667-4100 or visit aug.edu. “Your Sister’s Sister” shows Tuesday, November 13, at 6:30 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. Free. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. “Otello,” a presentation of the Metropolitan Opera, is Wednesday, November 14, at 6:30 p.m. at Regal Augusta Exchange Stadium 20. Visit regmovies.com.

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Special Events

Holiday Party is Thursday, November 8, from 5:30-8 p.m. at the Aiken Center for the Arts’ Gallery Story and includes artist demonstrations, wine and hors d’oeuvres and more. Call 803-641-9094 or visit aikencenterforthearts.org. Christmas Made in the South is Friday, November 9, from 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Saturday, November 10, from 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; and Sunday, November 11, from 11 a.m.5 p.m. at the James Brown Arena. Admission, good for all three days, is $5 before November 9; $6, day of; free, children 12 and under. Call 706-847-9480 or visit madinthesouthshows.com. Taste of Summerville is Friday, November 9, from 6-11 p.m., beginning at the ASU quadrangle, where participants will purchase a $10 bracelet and board a trolley that will take them to several places, including 5 O’Clock Bistro, Crums on Central, Helga’s Lounge, the Indian Queen, the Partridge Inn, Sheehan’s and the Village Deli. Visit summervilleaugusta.org. Oka-Chaffa Indian Festival, presented by the Southeastern Natural Sciences Academy, is SaturdaySunday, November 10-11, at the Phinizy Swamp Nature Park and includes Native American arts, crafts, dances, musicians, food, games, special guests Okefenokee Joe and Thunder the Buffalo and more. $12, adults; $6, children 6-12; free, 5 and younger. Call 706-828-2109 or visit naturalsciencesacademy.org. Santa Paws, an event that includes Santa and pet pictures, a bake sale and adoptable animals from local rescue groups, is Saturday, November 10, from 8 a.m.5 p.m. at Pendleton King Park. Proceeds will benefit That’s What Friends Are For. Visit onemoreglance.com. Craft Fair and Quilt Sale is Saturday, November 10, from 9 a.m.-2 p.m. at Our Redeemer Lutheran Church on Aumond Road and features local crafters, baked goods, Christmas ornaments, lunch and a drawing for

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a handmade queen-sized quilt. $2, raffle tickets. Visit orlcaugusta.com. Woofstock Mutts and Music Festival is Saturday, November 10, from 9:30 a.m.-3 p.m. at Highfields in Aiken and includes a parade and festival with live music. Proceeds go to the Aiken County Animal Shelter. Call 803-522-0471 or visit fotasaiken.org/woofstock.html. Summerville Parade is Saturday, November 10, from 10-11 a.m. beginning and ending at the ASU quadrangle. At the parade’s end will be children’s activities, food, and local live music. Diamond Lakes Fall Bonanza is Saturday, November 10, from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. at the Diamond Lakes Community Center. Call 706-772-2418 or visit augustaga.gov.

The Summerville Neighborhood Association is mixing things up a bit this year and kick-off their tour weekend with a Taste of Summerville Friday, November 9, from 6-11 p.m., beginning at the ASU quadrangle, where participants will purchase a $10 bracelet and board a trolley that will take them to several restaurants and lounges in the area. Saturday’s events also revolve around the quad, which is where the Summerville Parade, from 10-11 a.m., will begin and end and where Trolley Tours and Summerville Celebration, from 11 a.m.-4 p.m., will be held. For more information, see our calendar of events or visit summervilleaugusta.org.

Trolley Tours and Summerville Celebration is Saturday, November 10, from 11 a.m.-4 p.m., with guided tours of notable residences and the history of the area leaving the ASU quadrangle every half hour. At the quadrangle will be a festival with inflatables for kids and live music from the Crosstie Walkers, the Grumblers and Sallie West, Whiney Warlick, Turner Simkins and Howard Merry and Friends. $15; $10, with wristband from Taste of Augusta. Visit summervilleaugusta.org. Red, White & Blue Veterans Day Celebration is Saturday, November 10, from 6-8 p.m. at Evans Towne Center Park and features live music by the U.S. Army Signal Corps Band and fireworks at dusk. Attendees should bring blankets and chairs. Call 706-312-7192 or visit columbiacountyga.gov. Young Professionals of Augusta Fifth Anniversary Party is Saturday, November 10, from 7-10:30 p.m. at St. Paul’s River Room. Tickets — $40, advance; $50, day of — include food, beer and wine and proceeds benefit Heritage Academy. Visit ypaugusta.com.

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The 2012 CSRA-Augusta Veterans Day Parade is Monday, November 12, at 10 a.m., beginning at Sacred Heart Cultural Center and ending at the All Wars

Monument at Broad and 4th streets where a ceremony will be held at 11 a.m. Call 706-650-7782 or email jim_hussey@chambliss.senate.gov.

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Open House at LBC American Legion Post 153 on Langley Pond, for all veterans and their families, is Monday, November 12, from 1-5 p.m. and includes a tour of the renovated facilities and refreshments. Call 803-663-9535.

from 8 a.m.-2 p.m. at the 8th Street Bulkhead and features produce, arts and crafts and more for sale, as well as live music and entertainment. Call 706-627-0128 or visit theaugustamarket.com.

Holiday Open House, featuring a bake sale, book signings, complimentary coffee bar, a cooking demonstration at 1 p.m. and more, is Thursday, November 15, from 10 a.m.-5 p.m. at Sacred Heart Cultural Center. $5. Call 706-826-4700 or visit sacredheartaugusta.org.

Health

Thanksgiving Dinner, hosted by Macedonia East Baptist Church, is Thursday, November 15, from 10 a.m.-2 p.m. at May Park Community Center. Call 706-231-4937 or visit macedoniaeast.com.

Lung Cancer and Lung Disease Class, led by pulmonologist Lynn Brannen and featuring tests and smoking cessation information, is Thursday, November 8, from 6-7:30 p.m. at University Hospital. Pre-registration required. Visit universityhealth.org.

The Holiday Gingerbread Village will be in the rotunda of the Augusta Museum of History November 15-25. The historic-themed gingerbread structures will be available for purchase by silent auction, with the proceeds going to the museum. Call 706-722-8454 or visit augustamuseum.org.

Bariatric Seminar is Thursday, November 8, from 6-7 p.m.at Doctors Hospital. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706-651-4343 or visit doctors-hospital.net.

The Columbia County Fair will be held through November 10 at the fairgrounds across from Patriots Park. Hours are Monday-Thursday, 5-11 p.m.; Friday, 5 p.m.-midnight; Saturday, noon-midnight; and Sunday, 1-11 p.m. Events include rides and games, shows, food, a petting zoo and special performances. Admission and ride special daily. Visit columbiacountyfair.net.

The PEACE (Poetic Expression and Creative Enlightenment) Show, a community gathering of area ar tists organized by billy s (shown here), opens Friday, November 9, from 7-11 p.m. at Gaar tdensity Gallery downtown and will remain up until Friday, December 7. Visit facebook.com/gaar tdensitygallery.

Car Seat Class is Thursday, November 8, from 5:45-8 p.m. at MCGHealth Building 1010C. $10. Pre-registration required. Call 706-721-7606 or visit georgiahealth.org/kids.

The Augusta Ghost Trolley offers tours every Friday and Saturday at 7 and 9 p.m. departing from the Augusta Museum of History. The 90-minute tour includes the Old Medical College, the Haunted Pillar and St. Paul’s Cemetery. $22, adults; $12, children ages 5-12. Pre-registration required. Call 706-814-5333 or visit augustaghosttrolley.com. Weekly Wine Tastings at Vineyard Wine Market in Evans are each Friday from 4:30-6:30 p.m. and each Saturday from 1-6 p.m. Call 706-922-9463 or visit vine11.com. Apres Market walking tour of downtown art galleries meets Saturdays at 2 p.m. at the Augusta Market at the River. The tour, which lasts until 5 p.m., includes live painting, children’s reading hours, demonstrations and discounts. Visit artistsrowaugusta.com. The Augusta Market at the River is every Saturday through November 17

Breastfeeding Class is Thursday, November 8, from 6:30-9:30 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Pre-registration required. Call 706-651-2229 or visit doctors-hospital.net. Weight Loss Surgery Seminar is Thursday, November 8, at 7 p.m. at the Columbia County Library. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706-7212609 or visit georgiahealth.org/weightloss. Women’s Center Tours are Thursday, November 8, from 7-9:30 p.m. at University Hospital. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706-7742825 or visit universityhealth.org. Baby Care Basics and Breastfeeding Class is Saturday, November 10, from 9 a.m.-noon at Trinity Hospital of Augusta. Pre-registration required. Visit trinityofaugusta.com. Childcare and Babysitting Safety, a program for those ages 11-14, is Saturday, November 10, from 9 a.m.-3 p.m. at Trinity Hospital of Augusta. $30 fee includes lunch. Pre-registration required. Visit trinityofaugusta.com. Short and Sweet, a weekend childbirth education class, is Saturday, November 10, from 9 a.m.-4:30 p.m. and Sunday, November 11, from 1-5 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Pre-registration required. Call 706-651-2229 or visit doctors-hospital.net.

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Childbirth Tours are Saturday, November 10, from 10:30-11:30 a.m. at GHSU’s Medical Center. Preregistration required. Call 706-721-9351 or visit georgiahealth.org. Health and Wellness Seminar is Saturday, November 10, from noon-2 p.m. at Superior Academy. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706-364-8127 or visit superioracademy.com. Breast Self-Exam Class is Monday, November 12, at 4 p.m. at University Hospital. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706-774-4141 or visit universityhealth.org. Look Good, Feel Better, a class for female cancer patients who want to maintain their appearance and self-image during radiation and chemo, is Monday, November 12, from 5-7 p.m. at the American Cancer Society’s office. Pre-registration required. Call 706731-9900. Total Joint Replacement Educational Talk is Tuesday, November 13, from 1:30-3:30 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706651-4343 or visit doctors-hospital.net. Spine Education Class is Tuesday, November 13, at 3:30 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Free, but preregistration required. Call 706-651-4343 or visit doctors-hospital.net. Pickles and Ice Cream, a class for women in their first trimester of pregnancy, is Tuesday, November 13, from 7-9:30 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Pre-registration required. Call 706-651-2229 or visit doctors-hospital.net. Childbirth Tours are Tuesday, November 13, from 7:30-8:30 p.m. at GHSU’s Medical Center. Preregistration required. Call 706-721-9351 or visit georgiahealth.org.

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Look Good, Feel Better, a program for female cancer patients who want to maintain their appearance and self-image during radiation and chemo, is Wednesday, November 14, from 1:30-3:30 p.m. at GHSU’s Cancer Center. Pre-registration required. Call 706-721-0466 or visit georgiahealth.org. Infant CPR Class is Thursday, November 15, from 7-8:30 p.m. at University Hospital. Free, but preregistration required. Call 706-774-2825 or visit universityhealth.org. Breastfeeding Class is Thursday, November 15, from 7-9 p.m. at Babies R. Us. Free, but pre-registration required. Call 706-774-2825 or visit universityhealth.org. Child Safety Seat Inspections and Car Seat Classes, sponsored by Safe Kids East Central, are offered by appointment at either the Safe Kids Office or MartinezColumbia Fire Rescue. Call 706-721-7606 or visit georgiahealth.org/safekids. Joint Efforts, presented by Trinity Hospital of Augusta, meets every Thursday from 11-11:45 a.m. at Augusta Bone and Joint, and features a free seminar about knee and hip pain, treatments, medication, food and exercise. Call 706-481-7604 or visit trinityofaugusta.com. Infant CPR Anytime Learning Program will be held Thursdays at 6:30 p.m. at the first floor information desk (west entrance) of Georgia Health Sciences University. Visit georgiahealth.edu. Multiple Sclerosis and Parkinson Disease Aquatics Class meets every Monday and Friday at noon at the Wilson Family Y. Free for members; $3 for nonmembers. Pre-registration required. Call Claudia Collins at 706-922-9664 or visit thefamilyy.org.

Presented by AAFES and the Directorate of Family and MWR Featuring an Extensive Selection of Wines Food to complement the wine tasting, live music and door prizes Ticket Prices: Active-Duty/Spouses | $20 Advance | $25 Day Of DoD/Retirees/Civilians | $25 Advance | $30 Day Of Designated Drivers | $20 Buy your tickets at MWR Marketing, Gordon’s Conference & Catering, PX, PXtra and Class VI 706-791-6780/2205 www.fortgordon.com &LYLOLDQV :HOFRPH 0XVW EH RU ROGHU

Heart Attack and Stroke Prevention Orientation is every Monday at 6 p.m. and Tuesday at 2 p.m. at University Hospital’s Heart & Vascular Institute (Classroom 3). Call 706-774-5548 or visit universityhealth.org. 8NOVEMBER2012

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Adapted Wii Special Populations available by appointment at the Wilson Family Y, and feature individual ½-hour classes for physically and developmentally challenged individuals of all ages. $10, members; $20, non-members. Call Claudia Collins at 706-922-9662 or visit thefamilyy.org.

Support

Living Well with Diabetes Adult Support Group meets Thursday, November 8, at 5 p.m. at University Hospital. Call 706-868-3241 or visit universityhealth.org.

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Breast Cancer Support Group meets Thursday, November 8, from 5:30-7:30 p.m. at GHSU’s Cancer Center. Call 706-721-4109 or visit georgiahealth.org.

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Cancer Survivor Support Group meets Thursday, November 8, from 6-7 p.m. at Augusta Oncology Associates. Call 706-651-2283 or visit doctorshospital.net. Brain Injury Support group meets Thursday, November 8, from 6-7:30 p.m. at NeuroRestorative Georgia. Call 706-829-0370 or visit wrh.org. Alzheimer’s Support Group meets Thursday, November 8, at 7 p.m. at the Alzheimer Association Chapter Building on Central Avenue. Call 706-731-9060 or visit universityhealth.org. PFLAG Augusta, a support group for parents, family, friends and allies of LGBT people and LGBT people themselves, meets Thursday, November 8, at 7 p.m. at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Augusta. Call 803-645-1436 or visit plag.org. ALS Support Lunch and Learn is Friday, November 9, from 11 a.m.-2 p.m. at GHSU’s Medical Office Building. Pre-registration required. Call 706-721-2681 or visit georgiahelath.org.

Moms Connection, a free support group for new mothers and their babies, meets Tuesdays from 1-2 p.m. at Georgia Health Sciences Building 1010C. Call 706-721-9351 or visit georgiahealth.org.

Education

Intro to Excel Class is Thursday, November 8, at 6 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org. 1862: Making War — Southern Industrialization, an Augusta and the Civil War Symposium series, begins Friday, November 9, at the Morris Museum of Art, with the Edward J. Cashin Memorial Woodrow Wilson Lecture at 6:30 p.m. and a reception at 7:30 p.m. On Saturday, November 10, the morning session begins at 8:30 a.m. at the Kroc Center with lectures and lunch and the afternoon session begins at 1 p.m. at the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center and features a Petersburg boat guided canal tour. Friday’s events are free; Saturday’s events are $30. Registration is required for both days. Call 706-823-0440, ext. 7, or email hmadden@augustacanal.com. Emancipation: A Black and White Experience, a special program to acknowledge the 150th year of the Emancipation Proclamation, is Saturday, November 10, at 10 a.m. at Redcliffe Plantation State Historic Site on Beech Island. The event includes a dramatic reading of the Emancipation Proclamation, tours of the mansion and slave quarters and more. $8, adults; $6.50, South Carolina seniors; $5, ages 6-16. Call 803-827-1473 or visit southcarolinaparks.com/redcliffe.

Pink Magnolias Breast Cancer Support Group meets Monday, November 12, at 6:30 p.m. at University Hospital. Call 706-774-4141 or visit universityhealth.org.

Tips for Successful Resume Writing and Interviews Workshop is Saturday, November 10, from 10:30 a.m.noon at the Friedman Branch Library. Pre-registration suggested. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org.

Men’s Breast Cancer Support Group meets Monday, November 12, at 7 p.m. at University Hospital. Call 706-774-4141 or visit universityhealth.org.

Online Searching, a Jobseeker workshop, is Saturday, November 10, from 10:30 a.m.-1 p.m. at the Aiken Public Library. Call 803-642-2023 or visit abbe-lib.org.

Caregiver Support Group meets Tuesday, November 13, from 3-4 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Call 706-6512283 or visit doctors-hospital.net.

Tangled Threads Quilting Demonstrations are Sunday, November 11, from 1-4 p.m. at the Augusta Museum of History. Free with museum admission. Call 706-7228454 or visit augustamuseum.org.

OB/GYN Cancer Support Group meets Tuesday, November 13, at 7 p.m. at University Hospital. Call 706-821-2944 or visit universityhealth.org. Weight Loss Support Group meets Thursday, November 15, from 6-7 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Call 706-6514343 or visit doctors-hospital.net. Beyond the Bars is a support group for those with incarcerated loved ones. For more information about meetings, call Gerry Nail at 706-855-8636.

Intro to PowerPoint Class is Monday, November 12, at 6 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org. Free Couponing at Drugstores Class for adults is Tuesday, November 13, at 10 a.m. at the Kroc Center. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org.

Diabetes Youth Support Group meets quarterly. For more information, call 706-868-3241 or visit universityhealth.org.

Fifth Annual Business Expo is Wednesday, November 14, from 9:30 a.m.-4 p.m. at the Boathouse Center. Keynote speaker is Paul K. Watts, business opportunity specialist at the SBA. Free; lunch provided. Preregistration required. Call 706-821-2406 or visit augustaga.gov/businessexpo.

Cardiac Support Group meets three times a year. For more information on meetings, as well as for pre-registration, call 706-774-5864 or visit universityhealth.org.

Digital Camera Basics Class is Wednesday, November 14, from 10 a.m.-noon at the Headquarters Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org.

Adult Sexual Assault and Rape Support meets for group counseling. For more information, call 706-7245200 or visit universityhealth.org.

Resumes with Word Templates, a two-session course, is Thursday-Friday, November 15-16, at 10 a.m. at the Diamond Lakes Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org.

Narcotics Anonymous meets Fridays and Sundays at 7:30 p.m. at Trinity Hospital of Augusta. Visit na.org. AA meets every Sunday and Wednesday at 7:15 p.m. at Aiken Regional Medical Centers’ Aurora Pavilion, and includes an open discussion. Call 800-322-8322 or visit aikenregional.com. 24 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Burn Support Group meets every Tuesday at 10:30 a.m. at Doctors Hospital’s Lori Rogers Nursing Library, JMS Building. All burn survivors, and their families and friends are welcome. Call Tim Dorn at 706-651-6660 or visit doctors-hospital.net.

The Joy of Signing meets every first and third Thursday from 10:30 a.m.-noon at the Headquarters Branch Library. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. GED Classes are held Tuesdays and Thursdays from 5:30-8 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. 8NOVEMBER2012


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Pre-registration required. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. Free Tutoring for all ages, offered by ASU’s Literacy Center, is available by appointment Mondays-Thursday, from 4-8 p.m., at the center at 1401 Magnolia Drive. Appointments required. Call 706-737-1625 or visit aug.edu. Computer classes are offered every Thursday at 6 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org. ESL classes are offered every Wednesday at 6 p.m. at Headquarters Branch Library (Third Floor Writing Lab). Pre-registration required. Call Charles Garrick at 803-279-3363 or visit ecgrl.org. Intermediate Spanish Language Class is each Monday from 2:30-4 p.m. at Friedman Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org. Beginner’s Spanish Language Class is each Monday from 4-5 p.m. at Friedman Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org.

Color in the Trees, a fall foliage stroll that is part of the Augusta Canal’s Discovery Walks series, is Saturday, November 10, at 10 a.m. and Sunday, November 11, at 3 p.m. Led by UGA Extension Agent Sid Mullins, the walk begins at the Lockkeepers Cottage at the Savannah Rapids Pavilion. Free, Canal Keeper members; $2, non-members. Call 706-823-0440, ext. 2, or visit augustacanal.com. The Augusta RiverHawks vs. the Pensacola Ice Flyers is Thursday, November 15, at 7:35 p.m. at the James Brown Arena. $10-$21. Call 706-993-2645 or visit augustariverhawks.com. Fall Fest at Graystone Ranch Wildlife Education Center and Nature Park is going on through November 30, on Fridays and from 10 a.m.-midnight and Sundays from noon-midnight. the event includes a haunted hayride and fireworks over the lake through November 3, hiking, fishing, boat rides, exotic animal tours, petting zoos, a pumpkin patch, a hay maze, photos with the scarecrow, zip lines and more. $10. Visit graystoneranch.com.

Benefit

Kroc Trotters Running Group, for those ages 16 and older, meets each Tuesday and Thursday at the Kroc Center to run the trails of the Augusta Canal. Free, members; $15, non-members. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org.

An Evening at the Opera, a fundraiser for the Jessye Norman School of the Arts hosted by Jessye Norman and featuring students from the school, is Sunday, November 11, at 5 p.m. at ASU’s Maxwell Theatre. $40; $20, students 25 and under and active-duty military. Call 706-667-4100 or visit tickets.aug.edu.

The Augusta Rugby Club holds weekly practice sessions at 6:30 p.m. on Tuesdays and Thursdays at the Larry Bray Memorial Pitch, 100 Wood Street in Augusta, adjacent to the Augusta GreenJackets’ stadium at Lake Olmstead. Experienced rugby players and newbies ages 18 and up are welcome, and those interested should bring a pair of cleats (cross trainers will work) a mouthguard, gym shorts and a T-shirt. Visit augustarugby.org or Facebook under the Augusta Rugby Club heading.

American Heart Association Fundraiser, featuring food, music, carnival games and more, is Friday, November 9, from 6-10 p.m. at Sno-Cap Drive-In in North Augusta. Visit heart.org.

James Brown Family Foundation Toy Giveaway Registration is each Saturday, November 3-December 1, from 9-11 a.m. at the James Brown Arena. Parents must have valid state ID, as well as birth certifications and proof of Social Security Number for each child ages 1-12. Visit augustaentertainmentcomplex.com. Operation Christmas Child, a shoe-box gift filled with toys, school supplies and hygiene supplies that will be delivered to needy children overseas, is accepting donations during collection week, November 12-19. Collection locations include Aiken First Baptist, Bel Ridge Baptist in North Augusta, Edgefield Baptist Association, Mount Pleasant Baptist Church, Trinity United Methodist Church in Bamberg and Winfield Heights Baptist Church in Williston. For more information, call 803-649-5802 or visit smaritanspurse.org/occ. Karma Yoga is offered at Just Breathe Studio, downtown Aiken, each Friday at 10 a.m. and is free if participants bring a donation of a personal item, which will be given to the Cumbee Center to Assist Abused Persons. Call 803-648-8048 or visit justbreathestudio.com.

Sports-Outdoors

ASU volleyball team takes on UNC-Pembroke Friday, November 9, at 6 p.m. at Chistenberry Field House. Call 706-731-7925 or visit aug.edu. Group Exercise Certification Class is Saturday, November 10, from 8 a.m.-4:30 p.m. at Shiloh Community Center. Pre-registration required. Call 800237-6242 or visit netafit.org. Girls on the Run 5K is Saturday, November 10, at 9 a.m. at the Kroc Center. Pre-registration deadline is November 2. $25. Visit girlsontherunofthecsra. org/2012-fall-5K. Sixth Annual Great Pumpkin Chase 5K, to benefit Kids Restart Inc., is Saturday, November 10, at 9 a.m. at the Julian Smith BBQ Pit on Lake Olmstead. $20, preregistration; $23, race-day registration, which begins at 7:30 a.m. Call 706-828-0180 or visit active.com. 8NOVEMBER2012

Thank You

from Patsy Scott

I would like to express my gratitude to each of you for the opportunity to serve as your School Board Trustee for Richmond County School Board District 5. I believe that I have been called to carry on the tradition for such a time as this! Because I believe in transparency, I will continue to be visible in the schools and community. To keep you informed, I will continue with the quarterly Information Breakfast. You can count on me to be your voice on the Board!

BlazeSports Swim Team, for all ages of physically challenged swimmers who want to train for competition, meets at the Wilson Family Y. $35 a month, members; $50 a month, non-members. Preregistration required. Visit thefamilyy.org. Zumba Sentao and Zumba classes meet every Monday and Wednesday at 6:30 p.m. at the Aiken County Recreation Center on Jefferson Davis Highway in Graniteville, S.C. $6 per class, with coupons available. Call 706-627-1767. Wheelchair Tennis is each Monday at 6 p.m., weather permitting, at the Club at Rae’s Creek. Free and open to the public. Call 706-826-5809 or visit alsalley@wrh.org. Augusta Canal Boat Tours lasting one hour are offered Monday-Saturday at 10 a.m., 11:30 a.m., 1:30 p.m. and 3 p.m., and Sunday at 1:30, 3 and 4:30 p.m. All tours include admission to the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center. Call 706-823-0440 or visit augustacanal.com.

Come in for a tour TODAY!

The Augusta Fencers Club is open five nights a week from 5:30-9 p.m. and most Saturday mornings from 10 a.m.-noon. Visitors always welcome. Call 706-722-8878. Thursday Night Chain Reaction Ride begins at 6 p.m. each Thursday at Patriots Park in Grovetown. For intermediate to fast-paced cyclists, who average 25-32 miles. Participants should bring their own water and helmet. Call 706-855-2024 or visit chainreactionbicycles.net. Riverview Disc Golf League meets each Thursday at 6 p.m. at Riverview Park in North Augusta. $5 entry fee and $1 ace pool. Call 803-215-8181 or visit augustadiscgolf.com. Road Bike Ride meets each Thursday at 6:30 p.m. at Andy Jordan’s Bicycle Warehouse downtown for an approximately 25-mile ride at a moderate to fast pace. Front and rear lights, as well as a helmet, are required. Call 706-724-6777 or visit andyjordans.com.

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Guided Trail Rides at Hilltop Riding Stables at Fort Gordon are available Saturdays at 9 a.m., 10:30 a.m., noon, 1:30 p.m. and 3 p.m.; Sundays at 9 a.m., 10:30 a.m. and noon; and Wednesday-Friday at 11 a.m. with reservations 24 hours in advance. All trail rides are on a first-come, firstserved basis, and participants should arrive 30 minutes prior to the trail ride starting for sign in procedures. $23-$30. Call 706-791-4864 or visit fortgordon.com. Zumba with Sohailla is every Saturday from 10-11 a.m. at the Ballroom Dance Center in Evans. Call 706-421-6168 or visit zumbawithsohailla. blogspot.com.

Wilderness Survival, a backcountry camping and emergency survival skills program for those ages 8-18, is Friday, November 9, from 4:30-5:30 p.m. at Reed Creek Park. Members, free; non-members, $2 per child. Preregistration required. Call 706-210-4027 or visit reedcreekpark.com. Freedom Friday at the Family Y of Augusta South, for kids ages 8 weeks to 12 years, is Friday, November 9, from 6-9:30 p.m. Free for active-duty military families. Visit thefamilyy.org.

event includes door prizes and a free book for each participant. Call 803642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov. Special Thanksgiving Story Time is Tuesday, November 13, at 6 p.m. at the Euchee Creek Branch Library. Call 706-556-0594 or visit ecgrl.org. Totally Nonstop Toddler Time, the theme of which is sweets, is Wednesday, November 14, at 10 a.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. For those up to 24 months, it includes songs, nursery rhymes, lap games, music and stories. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org.

Safe Sitter, a babysitting class for those ages 11-13, is Saturday, November 10, from 8:45 a.m.-4 p.m. at the Safe Kids office. $35 fee includes lunch. Preregistration required. Call 706-721-7606 or visit georgiahealth.org/safekids. Jewelry 101 for ages 8-11 is Wednesday, November 14, at 1 p.m. at the Saturday Historic Trolley Tours are Saturdays from 1:30-3:15 p.m. at the Columbia County Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-447-7657 or Augusta Museum of History. Reservations required 24 hours in advance. National Gaming Day Celebration, featuring board games, computer games visit ecgrl.org. $12. Call 706-724-4067 or visit augustamuseum.org. and more, is Saturday, November 10, from 10:30 a.m.-noon at North Augusta’s Nancy Carson Library. Call 803-279-5767 or visit abbe-lib.org. French Language Class, for those in grades 1-5, is Wednesday, November Lakeside Rideouts at Hilltop Riding Stables at Fort Gordon are each Sunday 14, at 4 p.m. at the Aiken Public Library. Free, but limited to the first 15 to beginning at 1:30 p.m. on a first-come, first-served basis. The ride, which Parents Night Out at the Marshall Family Y and the Family Y of North pre-register. Call 803-642-2023 or visit abbe-lib.org. begins at 2 p.m., is a two-hour guided ride to Wilkerson Lake. $45-$50. Call Augusta, for kids ages 2-12, is Saturday, November 10, from 6-9:30 p.m. 706-791-4864 or visit fortgordon.com. $12, members; $20, non-members. Visit thefamilyy.org. Gobble Gobble Craft Workshop for those ages 3-5 is Thursday, November 15, at 11 a.m. at the Appleby Branch Library. Participants should bring Weekly Group Runs include the Monday Metro Run meeting at Metro School’s Out Movie for Teens is Monday, November 12, at 2 p.m. at the glue, crayons or markers and pre-registration is required. Call 706-736Coffeehouse at 6 p.m.; Monday Intervals meeting at the Family Y track on Diamond Lakes Branch Library. Call for title and rating. Participants can 6244 or visit ecgrl.org. Wheeler Road at 7 p.m.; the Tuesday Nacho Mama’s Group Run at 6 p.m.; bring their own snacks and the library will provide some as well. Call 706Wednesday’s Blanchard Woods Group Run at 6 p.m.; Wednesday Stay in 772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org. Second Annual Harry Potter Potluck Thanksgiving, for those ages 6-11, Shape Group Run at 6 p.m.; Wednesday’s Post Office Hill Training Run at 7 is Thursday, November 15, at 5 p.m. at the Columbia County Library. p.m.; Thursday’s Homer Hustle at 6 p.m.; and Saturday’s Stay in Shape Run Our New Baby Brother or Sister, a baby care class for siblings, is Monday, Participants are invited to dress up as their favorite characters and bring a at 8 a.m. For more information, visit augustastriders.com. November 12, from 4-5 p.m. at Trinity Hospital of Augusta. Pre-registration dish from the Unofficial Harry Potter Cookbook. Pre-registration required. required. visit trinityofaugusta.com. Call 706-447-7657 or visit ecgrl.org. Hott Shott Disc Golf is each Wednesday at 7 p.m. at Killer B Disc Golf, 863 Broad Street, and features games and prizes for all ages and skill levels. Westminster Schools of Augusta Lower School Open House is Tuesday, Big Brother/Big Sister, a infant care class for siblings, is Thursday, $2. Call 706-814-7514 or visit killerbdiscgolf.blogspot.com/p/hott-shott. November 13, at 10 a.m. at the school and includes a meet and greet with November 15, from 6-7:30 p.m. at Doctors Hospital. Free, but preteachers and parents, a campus tour and more. Visit wsa.net. registration required. Call 706-651-2229 or visit doctors-hospital.net.

Kids-Teens

Lego Club for those in grades K-5 is Thursday, November 8, from 4-5 p.m. at the Aiken Public Library. No supplies needed. Call 803-642-2023 or visit abbe-lib.org. Diamond Lakes Puppet Players present a program about turkeys and Thanksgiving for families Friday, November 9, at 10 a.m. Pre-registration required. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org.

26 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

“Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Third Wheel” Release Party is Tuesday, November 13, from 4-5 p.m. at North Augusta’s Nancy Carson Library and includes activities and a chance to win a copy of the new book. Call 803279-5767 or visit abbe-lib.org.

In My Backyard shows at 7 p.m. and More Than Meets the Eye shows at 8 p.m. each Saturday in November at USC-Aiken’s DuPont Planetarium. Weather permitting, the observatory housing the Bechtel telescope will be open for viewing after each show. $4.50, adults; $3.50, seniors; $2.50, students grades 4K-12; $1, USC-A faculty, staff and students. Call 803641-3654 or visit rpsec.usca.edu/planetarium.

Thanksgiving Story Time, for those ages 8 and under accompanied by an adult, is Tuesday, November 13, at 4 p.m. in rooms 6-7 of the Weeks Center in Aiken. Participants are invited to dress as pilgrims and Indians and the Study Hall for teens meets Wednesdays from 3-5 p.m. at the Headquarters

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Branch Library. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org/teens. Steed’s Dairy is open through November 18. Hours are Fridays, 5-10 p.m.; Saturdays, 10 a.m.-10 p.m.; and Sundays, 1-6 p.m. Activities at the working dairy farm include a petting zoo, a jumping pillow, a giant tube slide, rubber duckie races, a preschool play area, a Maize, hayrides, pumpkin patch and more. $12 per person; those 2 and under free. Visit steedsdairy.com.

a.m. for 2-year-olds; Monday, Wednesday and Thursday at 11 a.m. for preschoolers; and Wednesdays for families with kids of all ages. Call 706863-1946 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time at the Euchee Creek Branch Library, for all ages, is each Wednesday at 10:30 a.m. and each Tuesday at 4:30 p.m. Call 706-5560594 or visit ecgrl.org.

Fall Fest at Graystone Ranch Wildlife Education Center and Nature Park is going on through November 30, on Fridays and from 10 a.m.-midnight and Sundays from noon-midnight. the event includes a haunted hayride and fireworks over the lake through November 3, hiking, fishing, boat rides, exotic animal tours, petting zoos, a pumpkin patch, a hay maze, photos with the scarecrow, zip lines and more. $10. Visit graystoneranch.com.

Story Time is every Tuesday at 10:30 a.m. at Harlem Branch Library. Call 706-556-9795 or visit ecgrl.org.

Kroc Tots Activity Hours, for those 5 and under, meets every Friday from 9-10 a.m. at the Kroc Center. Free, members; $1, non-members. Call 706364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org.

Story Time is every Wednesday at Appleby Branch Library from 10:0510:20 a.m. for toddlers 18 months-35 months, and from 10:30-11:15 a.m. for preschoolers ages 3 and up. Parent must stay with child. Call 706-7366244 or visit ecgrl.org.

Homeschool PE Time, for those elementary school aged, meets MondayFriday, from 9-11 a.m. at the Kroc Center. Free, members; call for nonmember prices. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org. Preschool Story Time (ages 2 and under) is every Wednesday at Headquarters Branch Library at 10 a.m. KinderCare Story Time (ages 3-6) is every Tuesday at 10 a.m. Group registration required. Call 706-8212600 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Tuesday at 10 a.m. at Diamond Lakes Branch Library. Groups of six or more must pre-register. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Tuesday at 10 a.m. at Friedman Branch Library. Groups of six or more must pre-register. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Wednesday at 10 a.m. at Wallace Branch Library. Preregistration required. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org.

Toddler Time, free play for children ages 5 and under, is each Monday and Wednesday from 9:30-11:30 a.m. at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken. Call 803-642-7631 or visit cityofaikensc.gov.

Story Time is every Wednesday at 10:15 a.m. for Pre-K, and either 11 or 11:30 a.m. for preschoolers at Aiken County Public Library. Call 803-6422023 or visit abbe-lib.org. Story Time is every Wednesday from 10:30-11 a.m. for toddlers and 11:15-11:45 a.m. for preschoolers at North Augusta Branch Library. Call 803-279-5767 or abbe-lib.org.

Seniors

Senior Luncheon, featuring guest speaker Steven Kendrick, AugustaRichmond County’s tax commissioner, is Wednesday, November 14, from 11:30 a.m.-1 p.m. at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History. $10; pre-registration required. Call 706-724-3576 or visit lucycraftlaneymuseum.com.

Hobbies

Story Time is each Wednesday at 10 a.m. at the Maxwell Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org.

Sunday Spades, for those ages 18 and up, is Sunday, November 11, from 2-5 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-821-2604 or visit ecgrl.org.

Story Time at the Columbia County Library is each Tuesday at 10:15 and 11 a.m. for those under 2; Monday, Wednesday and Thursday at 10:15

Recipe Exchange is Monday, November 12, at 6:30 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Participants should bring one copy of each of the recipes

they’d like to share. Pre-registration suggested. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org. Crochet That Winter Scarf, a two-day program for all skill levels, is Tuesday-Wednesday, November 13-14, from 10:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. Belly Dancing Classes are held Tuesdays at 6 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org.

Spiritual

Bible Teaching Seminar, featuring the birth of Samuel, is Saturday, November 10, from 1-2 p.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Participants should bring their Bibles. Visit donaldsao.com. 118th Anniversary Celebration is Sunday, November 11, at 2:30 p.m. at Mt. Zion Missionary Baptist Church, 2526 Lumpkin Road. Call 706-793-7399 or visit mtzionaugusta.org. Sunday activities at the Kroc Center include an adult Bible class at 9:30 a.m., youth Sunday school at 9:45 a.m., and a worship service at 11 a.m. Free. Call 706-364-5762 or visit krocaugusta.org.

Elsewhere

Holiday Lantern Workshop, a class for those 18 and up led by master potter Liz Ringus, is Thursday, November 8, and Thursday, November 15, from 6:30-8:30 p.m. at the Little Red Barn Gallery in Barnwell, S.C. All materials and tools, along with light refreshments, provided. $35. Preregistration required. Call 803-541-7900 or visit pawprintpottery.biz. Holiday Open House at the Salkehatchie Arts Center in Allendale, S.C., is Tuesday, November 13, from 4-7 p.m. and includes a meet and greet with artists, gift shopping, wine, hors d’oeuvres and more. Call 803-584-6084. Third Thursday in Barnwell, S.C., on the Circle is Thursday, November 15, from 5-7 p.m. and includes shopping, live music, entertainment and activities for the family. Free. Call 803-259-3266 or visit cityofbarnwell.com. If you would like to see your organization’s events listed in our calendar, please email Amy Christian at amy@themetrospirit.com. The deadline for each Thursday’s issue is the previous Friday at noon.

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Silver Lining It’s there if you look for it

Your pretty good might actually be really great. Are you missing it? I know it sounds hokey. You’ve heard that before. Carpe diem, right? That’s not what I mean. I’m not telling you to be content with what you have, either. I’m just suggesting that you step away and look from afar. Your life may be a hell of a lot better than you think. The brevity of life has been made abundantly clear lately. When Jordan died, everyone gasped. She was too young. There were so many things she never got to try. A year ago, my cousin got sick. From the beginning, she was told she would never get better. I was with her this weekend when she took her last breaths. She leaves behind a husband and four- and six-year-old daughters. Her mother was at her bedside. Situations like these shouldn’t be the only reasons to reflect upon and appreciate our riches. These days just feel so low, and any glimmer of hope seems bigger than usual. My friend Liz and I always say, “If every day was like our worst, we’d never make it.” I typically apply that to my marriage, resting on the fact that those days when The Man and I aren’t quite in sync are fleeting. They’ll pass. Liz’s perspective is real. After 9/11, she was laid off. No job. She was 24 years old and had to live with her parents. It felt awful. Five months later her dad died suddenly of a heart attack. Had she not been forced to move home, she wouldn’t have had the extra time with him. To this day, she is still, in a slightly strange way, thankful for that layoff. A few weeks ago, I found cheap airfare from Augusta to Washington, D.C. I called and asked my cousin if I could visit. We knew her time was rather limited, but we didn’t realize how close to the end she was. By the time I got there, she was in and out of sleep, losing consciousness regularly. I was disappointed. I wanted one more fun weekend with my cousin, sipping Miller Lites and singing at the top of our lungs. Once I was with my aunt and the rest of my family, I realized that it was very important for me to be there. It was a good thing. Perspective. This isn’t to minimize other big, real-world problems, either. As of this minute, there are still a million people without power because of Sandy. Failing to see the light at the end of the tunnel is understandable. Actually, without electricity it’s damn near impossible (didja groan?). Are you guilty of wanting what your neighbor has? Is their car newer? It seems that we always want a bigger house or a newer house. It’s hard to tell if we’re really looking for personal gain or trying to oneup our peers. Whose kid is better at math? Whose is a better football player? The competition is constant, and I’m sure no one is exempt. We’ve all felt the pinch of the economy. At times, when I’ve wanted to take this trip or by these boots, I acted like a child, complaining about what we couldn’t do. I lamented

about the pointless things. And that’s just silly. If we forget about what we don’t have, the view of what we’ve got becomes much clearer. I hate to make it seem so simple, but maybe it really can be. Everything isn’t all sunshine, roses and unicorns (though unis are totally real) every day. That’s a fact. Some days feel super bad. Chin up, buttercup. Maybe that silver lining is right in your face. Try not to hurry. You might miss it.

JENNYWRIGHT lives in Summerville with her husband, who she calls The Man, and two kids, who she affectionately calls The Boy and The Girl. She enjoys taking photos, cooking and playing tennis.

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VALERIEEMERICK

Singing Praises

Opera great Jessye Norman emcees fundraiser for the school named in her honor

Anyone who has lived in Augusta for more than five minutes is familiar with Jessye Norman. Even if they aren’t familiar with her talent as an opera singer, they have at least heard of the Jessye Norman Amphitheatre located downtown on the Riverwalk. What most Augustans probably don’t know is that there is a Jessye Norman School of the Arts located on Greene Street. The Jessye Norman School of the Arts (JNSA) is a free after-school program designed to develop and nurture the artistic and creative talents of students, who may come from economically disadvantaged or otherwise underserved backgrounds. The school offers a wide range of professional instruction in the fine arts, and since all students enrolled in the programs at JNSA must maintain at

8NOVEMBER2012

least a C average in their academic courses, the school also offers free academic tutoring to those students who need it. “I’m surprised how many people have never heard of it,” remarks Michael Ray, the school’s director. “I think we’re going on our 10th year in existence. The school was started by Dr. Linda Scales about 10 years ago, along with Jessye Norman. Originally, it was across the street at Saint John’s Methodist Church, and it stayed there for three or four years. Then Peter Knox donated this building, and we’ve been here ever since.” Ray is referring to 739 Greene Street, where the school is now located. The building is going through many exciting renovations at the moment that will enhance and increase the functionality of the current

space. One of the significant improvements will be the addition of an elevator, which will allow the school to cater to students who are unable to navigate the stairs that lead to the current classrooms. Additionally, the new classrooms will be larger in order to better accommodate the currently overflowing rooms. Fortunately, the rooms are overflowing with eager students, who just seem happy to be there and do not seem at all bothered by the overcrowded space. While the school currently only enrolls students in the fifth through eighth grades, there are plans to offer some high school courses beginning in January as part of the renovations. “When the downstairs gets finished,” explains Ray, “we’ll have room for a technology program we’re starting for high school kids. We’re going to pilot that with photography and Photoshop and a little bit of web design.” This weekend JNSA will be hosting a fundraising concert called “An Evening at the Opera,” which will be held at the Maxwell Theatre. A reception will follow. “We’ve done this yearly for the past three or four years,” says Ray. “Jessye Norman is the emcee, and most of the performers are her contemporaries from New York, with a couple of locals, like Dr. Rosalyn Floyd who is a piano professor at ASU and Tanya Courier is a local opera singer. So, it’s going to be an awesome event — and the Jessye Norman Chorus is going to get a chance to sing a song by themselves and then with the entire ensemble, so it’s going to be a really great event. And while some of the proceeds will go to the performers, the rest will help with the renovations currently going on at the school. “All the funds go to pay for the performance costs and anything leftover goes directly to the school,” Ray says. “In past years it’s been the biggest fundraiser for the school. The first half of the show is going to be standard opera and the second half will be lighter. A lot of Broadway show tunes and standards.” An Evening at the Opera ASU’s Maxwell Theatre Sunday, November 11 | 5 p.m. $40; $20, students and military 706-667-4100 | tickets.aug.edu

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30 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

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FEATURED

November 8 08Thursday, Live Music

Coyote’s - Dave Firmin, Rhes Reeves & the Coyote Band French Market Grille West - Doc Easton Smooth Jazz Joe’s Underground - 3rd Hand Smoke w/ Randy Carver & Wayne Malibu Jack’s - Marilyn Adcock Mellow Mushroom (Downtown and Evans) - Live and Local Rose Hill Estate - Preston Weston & Sandra Sky City - Opposite Box, 57 Flip Somewhere in Augusta - County Line Soul Bar - Daymoths & Simpletons The Willcox - Classic Jazz Wild Wing - Jesup Dolly

Local favorites Snapdragon (above) and Livingroom Legends (at left) get together for a show at Sky City Saturday, November 10. The non-smoking show features music that starts at 10 p.m. and a $5 cover. Visit skycityaugusta.com.

What’s Tonight?

Casa Blanca - Thursday Tango Club Argos - Karaoke Cocktails Lounge - Karaoke Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Fox’s Lair - Soup, Suds & Trivia Helga’s Pub & Grille - Trivia The Highlander - Butt Naked Trivia The Loft - Karaoke Malibu Jack’s - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Evans) - Karaoke The Playground - Open Mic with Brandy Shannon’s - Karaoke Somewhere in Augusta - Country Line Villa Europa - Karaoke Wooden Barrel - ’80s Night Karaoke

November 9 09Friday, Live Music

100 Laurens - Jeff Johnston Augusta State University Maxwell Performing Arts Theatre - Cantus Carolina Ale House - Jim Perkins & Jason Prouty Cotton Patch - John Kolbeck Country Club - Ty Brown Coyote’s - Dave Firmin, Rhes Reeves & the Coyote Band Doubletree - Classic Jazz French Market Grille West - Doc Easton Joe’s Underground - Swyrv Malibu Jack’s - South Atlantic PI Bar & Grill - Jazz Duo Polo Tavern - Southern Meltdown Sky City - Afroman w/ DJ Scientist Somewhere in Augusta - Dave Mercer Surrey Tavern - Acosta Tavern at the Bean - Chandler Moody Wild Wing - Roshambeaux The Willcox - John Vaughn

What’s Tonight?

Cocktails Lounge - Grown-Up Fridays with DJ Cork and Bull Pub - Karaoke Eagle’s Nest - Free Salsa Lessons; Latin Dance Party Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Iron Horse Bar & Grill - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke with Ryan Moseley Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke with Jeff Barnes Mi Rancho (Clearwater) - Three J’s Karaoke Ms. Carolyn’s - Karaoke Palmetto Tavern - DJ Tim 32 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

The Playground - DJ Rebeck’s Hideaway - Open Mic Roadrunner Cafe - Karaoke with Steve Chappel Sky City -80’s Night Wooden Barrel - Karaoke Contest

Underground, On My Honor The Willcox - Jazz Jam Session w/ Preston & Weston Wild Wing - Acosta

10

Malibu Jack’s - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke, Salsa Dancing Shannon’s - Karaoke with Peggy Gardner

Saturday, November 10 Live Music

100 Laurens - Keith Gregory The Acoustic Coffeehouse - Open Acoustic Jam Session with Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold Appling Opry - Cricket Ridge Cotton Patch - John Berret’s Laroxes Country Club - Outshyne Coyote’s - Dave Firmin, Rhes Reeves & the Coyote Band Fox’s Lair - Chris Hardy Joe’s Underground - John Kolbeck MAD Studios - LeatherLips Malibu Jack’s - Tony Williams P.I. Bar and Grill - Not Gaddy Jazz with Pam Bowman The Playground - Rat Babies, Bezoar Polo Tavern - Preston & Weston Sky City - Snapdragon, Livingroom Legends Surrey Tarvern - Cope Wild Wing - Bad Cash

What’s Tonight?

Club Argos - Variety Show Cocktails Lounge - Latin Night Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Fox’s Lair - Karaoke with Beth Helga’s Pub & Grille - Trivia The Loft - DJ Richie Rich Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke with Rockin Rob Mi Rancho (Clearwater) - Karaoke with Danny Haywood Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke Ms. Carolyn’s - Karaoke Robbie’s - Saturday Night Dance Party Wooden Barrel - Kamikaze Karaoke

November 11 11Sunday, Live Music

5 O’Clock Bistro - Buzz and Candice (brunch) Cotton Patch - Keith Gregory (brunch) Malibu Jack’s - Playback The Band w/ Tutu Dy’Vine Morris Museum of Art - Shaun Piazza Patridge Inn - Sunday Evening Jazz w/ the Not Gaddy Jazz Trio Sector 7G - Latin for Truth, Above the

What’s Tonight?

November 12 12Monday, Live Music

Shannon’s - Open Mic Night

What’s Tonight?

Applebee’s (Evans) - Trivia Club Argos - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Trivia with Mike Thomas Somewhere In Augusta - Poker Tournaments Wild Wing - Trivia

November 13 13Tuesday, Live Music

First Round - Open Mic Night The Highlander - Open Mic Night Joe’s Underground - Happy Bones The Willcox - Piano Jazz Wild Wing - Sabo & Dave

What’s Tonight?

Club Argos - Karaoke Fishbowl Lounge - Dart League Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Karaoke w/ David Doane Malibu Jack’s - Karaoke Mellow Mushroom (Downtown and Evans) Trivia The Playground - Truly Twisted Trivia with Big Troy Polo Tavern - Karaoke Shannon’s - Karaoke with Mike Johnson Somewhere In Augusta - Big Prize Trivia

November 14 14Wednesday, Live Music

Joe’s Underground - Sibling String Malibu Jack’s - Live Music Wild Wing - TJ Mimbs Duo

What’s Tonight?

Club Argos - Santoni’s Satin Dolls Cocktails Lounge - Augusta’s Got Talent Cotton Patch - Trivia and Tunes Hotel Aiken - Karaoke w/ Tom Mitchell Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Karaoke w/ David Doane The Loft - Karaoke Malibu Jack’s - DJ Mike Swift Midtown Lounge - Karaoke w/ Charles O’Byrne Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke with Rockin’ Rob The Playground - Krazy Karaoke with Big Troy Polo Tavern - Karaoke w/ Tom Mitchell Somewhere in Augusta - Comedy Zone w/ David L. and Brent Blakeney Surrey Tavern - Trivia with Christian and Mickey

Upcoming

Chris Hardy and his 4-stringed little friend - Joe’s Underground November 15 Chris & Chris (from Mama Says) - Somewhere In Augusta November 15 Tiki Barflys - Wild Wing November 15 Bremt Lundy - 100 Laurens November 16 Steven Bryant - Cotton Patch November 16 Jared Ashley - Country Club November 16 Gut Locker - The First Round November 16 Steep Canyon Rangers - Imperial Theatre November 16 McKinley Band - Polo Tavern November 16 Smokey’s Farmland Band - Stillwater Tap Room November 16 The Hollerers - Somewhere in Augusta November 16 Surrey Tavern - Tony Williams and Blues Express November 16 Shameless Dave - Hoze’s Bar November 17 Sam Forrest - MAD Studios November 17 Augusta Stock Music Fest Pre-Show w/ Robbie Ducey, Tony Williams and the Blues Express, George Croft and the Vellotones, Mama Says Sky City November 17 Whiskey Gentry - Surrey Tavern November 17 Funk You - Surrey Tavern November 19-20 Kicks 99 Guitar Pull w/ Luke Bryan, Billy Currington, Brantley Gilbert, Little Big Town, Lee Brice, Lauren Alaina - James Brown Arena November 20 Stewart and Winfield - Surrey Tavern November 21 8NOVEMBER2012


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Rock the Vote

Actually, famous musicians, we would all prefer it if you didn’t

Four more years, four more years, four more years. That’s right; it will be four more years until we have musicians telling us who to vote for. This year’s election sure did bring out the psychos in music to show us who the right person is to lead our country. I’m not saying that any influence from any musical act actually worked for their candidate; if anything, I would say it hurt. Since the election is over, I think we should give out awards for this year’s “Musical Influences in Politics.” The following are the top three awards for the 2012 election. The award for Dumbest Comments by a Musician Who We Didn’t Know Was Still Playing Music goes to Megadeth frontman Dave Mustaine. Back on August 7, Dave explained to a crowd in Singapore how President Obama planned the killings of people in Colorado to help support his laws on firearms. Congrats on your award, Dave; you beat out Ted Nugent. The award for Best Full Figured Musician to Support Mitt Romney goes to Meat Loaf. Meat Loaf took the stage with Mitt Romney in Ohio and almost took the stage down with him. He definitely took out some eardrums. Does anyone else remember his nickname from the movie Fight Club? If not, do yourself a favor and Google it. Laughter will soon follow. Finally, here is the last award for this election. The award for Musician with the Most Political Ads Worn on Stage goes to Katy Perry. The only way she could have supported Barack Obama more would have been to cut off pieces of the president’s hair and glue them to her body. I would like to thank all of this year’s nominees for cramming their political views where we didn’t want to see them. Kid Rock, Lady Gaga, Big and Rich and Beyonce, we’ll see you all again in four years, unfortunately. We did not have any musicians going after some of the candidates that affect us on a local level, but why would they? Just for fun, let’s take a quick look at John Barrow and Lee Anderson. If I had to guess, Ted Nugent would definitely have supported John Barrow. Both of these guys love guns and Christmas trees, and “Ain’t nobody going to take that away from them.” For Lee Anderson, I would have picked something by Barneyw or Sesame Street. Here’s quick news about a new supergroup. Well maybe not so much of a supergroup but an awesome collaboration. Flea of the Red Hot Chili Peppers has teamed back up with Thom Yorke of Radiohead to reprise the band, Atoms for Peace. The two, along with Radiohead producer Nigel Godrich, percussionist Mauro Refosco and drummer Joey Waronker, first got together at Coachella in 2010 and now are set to release a record early next year titled “AMOK.” In other news, I still hate Taylor Swift. Officially, Swift sold over 1.2 million copies of her latest album “Red” in just one week. With the Foo Fighters on hiatus, Dave Grohl is now back to his drumming ways. Grohl has landed his old gig; he is officially the drummer for Queens of the Stone Age. The band has a new album coming out early next year and Dave will be behind the kit. No news yet on an exact release date or tour plans. This week’s Must Listen is Interpol’s frontman Paul Banks’ solo album called “Banks.” Download the track “Young Again” which he performed on Late Night with David Letterman last week. New album pick up for Tuesday: Soundgarden’s “King Animal.” What albums are you listening to? What bands are making a move to Augusta? How hot is Meat Loaf? Email me at matt@ themetrospirit.com.

MATTSTONE can be heard weekdays from 2-6 p.m. on 95 Rock. 8NOVEMBER2012

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AMYCHRISTIAN

Fit to Be Gold Challenge Update Name: Annette Drowlette Starting weight: 182.6 Weight at last weigh in: 166.4 Number of pounds lost: 16.2 Ranking: 2nd When we talked to Annette Drowlette at the initial Fit to Be Gold weigh in, winning the competition was not her first priority. “Winning the competition to me is just a bonus because you’re going to lose weight if you try,” she said in September. “If you’re motivated, you’re going to get something out of it.” Something happened in the intervening six weeks, however. Drowlette lost 16.2 pounds, vaulting her to the second-place position in the competition. “I knew I had lost 10 pounds, but I hadn’t been on a scale for a week, so when I saw 16.2, I said ‘I think your scale’s broken,’” she laughed. Something else has happened recently; after being laid off, Drowlette recently got a new job teaching metal detecting in Afghanistan. And that means she won’t be able to finish the Fit to Be Gold competition. “I will be at the weigh-in this Monday (November 12), but I’m going to tell everyone goodbye,” she said. “I’m really disappointed that I can’t finish.” Even though she’s leaving, we still thought we’d ask Drowlette was got her such great results. What’s your exercise plan? Three days a week I meet with the trainer, and that totals about two hours. When I first started, aerobically I would get out of breath really quickly. Now I’m up to two miles (on the treadmill) every time I go to the gym and I’m going four times a week. I go to the Bootcamp class they have on Saturdays, and that’s an hour long and, on the days I meet with my trainer, I do a mile on the treadmill before the workout and mile after the workout — not running but walking a decent pace. I have noticed such an increase. I don’t get out of breath like I used to. I don’t think people realize how important aerobic exercise is, and that has made a huge difference in my workout. I’m not out of breath, dying like I was when I first started. That’s very important. What’s your diet plan? I’m eating more times a day, but you have to measure everything you eat because you can’t count calories if you don’t know how much you’re eating. I eat a lot of fruit. I know a lot of people on the program try and stay away from fruit, but if you eat one of two pieces a day, if you stay within your calorie limit, you should be fine. I have eaten out a few times but I’ve had a salad. I just make sure that I’m really aware of my portions. I’m very diligent about that. It was interesting because after the last weigh in a lot of women wanted to know what my diet was. What’s been your biggest struggle? Just wanting to go back to old habits. The first couple weeks, I really wanted to go back to the Pizza Joint. And the whole job situation had me really stressed out. The day that I got laid off was the same day someone stole a safe out of my thrift shop. I was so utterly disappointed and I really wanted to go out and drink some alcohol. But I went to the gym; my trainer was even surprised. The funny thing is, I would not have passed the physical [for her new job] if I had not lost the weight. When I started the Fit to Be Gold, I had no idea that was I was going to lose my job and need the physical to get the new job. It’s just amazing how everything happened. What’s been your biggest success? Besides the obvious weight loss — I’m sitting in the clothes that I haven’t been in for 4-5 years — I just feel better about myself.

34 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

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SIGHTINGS

Michael Johnson

mejphoto.photoreflect.com

MaryVincent Pursley with Jay and Lisa Murray and Katelyn Gibbs at the SOA’s Pops! at the Bell concert.

Brad and Paige Usry with Nancy and Chip Story at the SOA’s Pops! at the Bell concert.

Erin Doran, Brittany Bahr, Jason Grimes and Ashley Bahr at the Loft.

SIGHTINGS

Shelby Doyle, James Anderson and Mada NaVarro at the Downtown Saloon.

Leverett Williams, Katherine Beul and Ellen Peacock at Surrey Tavern.

SIGHTINGS

Brittany Pawlak, Jeremy Pinion, Ileana Figueron and Zack Garletts at Bar West.

Robert Donohue, Jaycey Watson, Valerie Wynn and Kyle Joyce at the Bar West.

Sarah Hardin, Monika Medina and Brooke Arrington at the Country Club.

Michael Johnson

mejphoto.photoreflect.com

Angie Griffin, Kristi Lollis, Alex Greene and Becky Crowden at Wild Wing Cafe.

- Kenny, Owner of Aces and Eights Tattoo & Piercing

8NOVEMBER2012

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THE

BOX TOPS

Ralph may have come out on top, but “Argo” proves to be the little engine that could.

EIGHT

RANK

TITLE

WEEKEND GROSS

TOTAL GROSS

WEEK #

LAST WEEK

1

WRECK-IT RALPH

$49,038,712

$49,038,712

1

-

2

FLIGHT

$24,900,566

$24,900,566

1

-

3

ARGO

$10,209,103

$75,860,240

4

1

4

THE MAN WITH THE IRON FISTS

$7,910,980

$7,910,980

1

-

5

TAKEN 2

$5,919,493

$125,586,929

5

6

“The Man with the Iron Fists”

SAMEIFLING

Fighting, fighting and more fighting in this enjoyable throwaway Fans of Quentin Tarantino may be crestfallen to learn that the “presented by” credit he receives in “The Man with the Iron Fists” isn’t backed up by any other real credit (say, director or producer or key grip). The hip-hop impresario and performer RZA (pronounced RIZZ-uh) stars, directing a screenplay he also wrote. You may remember RZA from such immortal ’90s New York supergroups as the horrorcore pioneers Gravediggaz and the inimitable Wu-Tang Clan, who routinely sampled old martial-arts flicks and honed a gangsta-fied kung-fu aesthetic into something approaching a true mystique. (Tiger style!) Even if Tarantino didn’t do much on “Fists,” you can see why he’d want to sign this throwback. In true Wu-Tang fashion, the more names the merrier. Perhaps the best thing about “Fists,” then, is that it exists at all, and that it appears as a fully realized vision of RZA’s ideal campy martialarts flick. Is it a good movie? Nah. Will it make you laugh, cringe, gape and cheer? Yeah, probably. Inspired, you’ll run home and dust off “Wu-Tang: Shaolin Style” on old-school PlayStation while cranking up your scratched-up “Protect Ya Neck” CD. Along the way to this sublimity, you’ll have to overlook a couple of traditional sticking points for film snobs, namely, “quality acting” and “coherent story.” Russell Crowe naturally holds his own as an English dude named Jack Knife (note: he kills people with an awesome knife), but the second-best performer in the movie might just be Lucy Liu as the madam of a massive brothel called the Pink Blossom. Typically when Lucy Liu is the second-best actor in a given movie, it’s time to worry. At least RZA is decent as a blacksmith who, due to some disarmingly unfortunate circumstances, reluctantly joins the fight to save his dumpy Chinese hamlet, Jungle Village. The main bad guy is played by Byron Mann, channeling an evil Ziggy Stardust. Another hero is played by Rick Yune, looking exactly like the animated prince from “Mulan” and has a crazy mechanical knife suit that lets him kill thugs by the bushel but which fails spectacularly against a metallic titan played by pro wrestling superstar Dave Bautista. Virtually every woman in the cast is a prostitute except for Liu, who of course is in charge of all the prostitutes. Here’s the storyline: A shipment of government gold is coming through the

village. Rival gangs all want it. Some stuff happens. RZA’s girlfriend (Jamie Chung) is forget-your-name gorgeous. Orphan kids get into trouble. Mostly, people fight. For the R-rating, it doesn’t indulge in nudity. Seriously, it’s just fighting, with some dialogue to move us toward more fighting. But it looks and sounds fantastic. If there is high art contained in “Fists,” it’s in indulgent gore and magical combat scenes. You will see people killed in fashions most ridiculous, all crushings and stabbings and beheadings and poison dartings and dismemberments and whatnot, often set to tunes from the likes of Kanye West, the Black Keys and, yes, re-orchestrated versions of Wu-Tang classics. RZA has said the final result represented 85 percent of his vision. God help anyone who runs into that remaining 15 percent in a dark alley.

THE8ERS Movie times are subject to change.

The Big Mo

Gates open at 7 p.m.; shows begin at 8:30 p.m. November 9-10 Field 1: Wreck-It Ralph (PG) and Hotel Transylvania (PG); Field 2: Alex Cross (PG13) and Taken 2 (PG-13)

Masters 7 Cinemas

November 9 Trouble with the Curve (PG-13) 4:15, 7, 9:30; The Possession (PG-13) 7:45, 10; The Expendables 2 (R) 4:45, 7:30, 9:45; The Odd Life of Timothy Green (PG) 4:30, 7:15, 9:30; The Campaign (R) 5:30, 7:45, 10; Hope Springs (PG-13) 4, 6:45; The Dark Knight Rises (PG-13) 9; Ice Age: Continental Drift (PG) 5:30; Brave (PG) 5:15, 7:30, 9:45 November 10 Trouble with the Curve (PG-13) 1:15, 4:15, 7, 9:30; The Possession (PG-13) 7:45, 10; The

36 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Expendables 2 (R) 1:45, 4:45, 7:30, 9:45; The Odd Life of Timothy Green (PG) 1:30, 4:30, 7:15, 9:30; The Campaign (R) 1:15, 3:15, 5:30, 7:45, 10; Hope Springs (PG-13) 1:30, 4, 6:45; The Dark Knight Rises (PG-13) 9; Ice Age: Continental Drift (PG) 1, 3:15, 5:30; Brave (PG) 12:45, 3, 5:15, 7:30, 9:45

Evans Stadium 6

November 9-10 Skyfall (PG-13) 12:30, 1:15, 3:45, 4:30, 7, 7:45, 9:30, 10:15; Flight (R) 1, 4, 7:10, 10:10; The Man with the Iron Fists (R) 12:20, 2:50, 5:10, 7:35, 10; Wreck-It Ralph (PG) noon, 1:30, 2:30, 4:15, 5, 6:45, 7:30, 9:15, 10; Cloud Atlas (R) 1, 4:30, 8 Alex Cross (PG-13) 12:10, 2:40, 5:10, 7:35, 10:10; Paranormal Activity 4 (R) 1:05, 3:15, 5:30, 7:50, 10:15; Argo (R) 12:50, 3:45, 6:45, 9:40; Here Comes the Boom (PG) noon, 2:20, 4:50, 7:25, 9:50; Taken 2 (PG-13) 12:40, 3, 5:20, 7:40, 10:05; Hotel Transylvania (PG) noon, 2:10, 4:45, 7:15;

Pitch Perfect (PG-13) 1:45, 4:40, 7:20, 9:55

Regal Exchange 20

November 9 Skyfall (PG-13) noon, 12:45, 1:05, 2:20, 3:55, 4:15, 5:25, 6:30, 7, 7:20, 7:40, 8, 9:10, 9:40, 10:10, 10:30, 10:50, 11:10, 12:20, 12:45; Flight (R) 12:30, 1:10, 3:40, 4:20, 7:10, 7:30, 10:15, 10:35; The Man with the Iron Fists (R) noon, 12:20, 2:45, 3:05, 5:05, 5:25, 7:35, 8:30, 10:10, 10:50, 12:30; WreckIt Ralph (PG) 1:50, 11:55, 1:55, 2:20, 2:40, 4:35, 4:55, 5:15, 7:15, 7:45, 8:05, 10, 10:20, 12:35; Cloud Atlas (R) 2, 3:20, 7, 10:40; Fun Size (PG-13) noon, 2:05, 4:15; Silen Hill: Revelation (R) 12:40, 2:55, 5:10, 7:25, 9:40, 11:55; Alex Cross (PG13) 2, 4:30, 7, 9:25, 11:55; Paranormal Activity 4 (R) 2:25, 4:45, 7:40, 9:55, 12:10; Argo (R) 2:05, 4:50, 7:35, 10:30; Here Comes the Boom (PG) 10:35; Sinister (R) 2:10, 4:40, 7:10, 9:50, 12:25; Taken 2 (PG-13) 1, 5:40, 8, 10:20, 12:40; Hotel Transylvania (PG) 11:55, 2:10, 4:25, 6:50; The

Perks of Being a Wallflower (PG-13) 1, 3:45 November 10 The Metropolitan Opera: The Tempest (NR) 12:55; Skyfall (PG-13) noon, 12:45, 1:05, 2:20, 3:55, 4:15, 5:25, 6:30, 7, 7:20, 7:40, 8, 9:10, 9:40, 10:10, 10:30, 10:50, 11:10, 12:20, 12:45; Flight (R) 12:30, 1:10, 3:40, 4:20, 7:10, 7:30, 10:15, 10:35; The Man with the Iron Fists (R) noon, 12:20, 2:45, 3:05, 5:05, 5:25, 7:35, 8:30, 10:10, 10:50, 12:30; Wreck-It Ralph (PG) 1:50, 11:55, 1:55, 2:20, 2:40, 4:35, 4:55, 5:15, 7:15, 7:45, 8:05, 10, 10:20, 12:35; Cloud Atlas (R) 2, 3:20, 7, 10:40; Fun Size (PG-13) noon, 2:05, 4:15; Silen Hill: Revelation (R) 12:40, 2:55, 5:10, 7:25, 9:40, 11:55; Alex Cross (PG-13) 2, 4:30, 7, 9:25, 11:55; Paranormal Activity 4 (R) 2:25, 4:45, 7:40, 9:55, 12:10; Argo (R) 2:05, 4:50, 7:35, 10:30; Here Comes the Boom (PG) 10:35; Sinister (R) 2:10, 4:40, 7:10, 9:50, 12:25; Taken 2 (PG-13) 1, 5:40, 8, 10:20, 12:40; Hotel Transylvania (PG) 11:55, 2:10, 4:25, 6:50; The Perks of Being a Wallflower (PG-13) 1, 3:45 8NOVEMBER2012


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ACTION

“Skyfall,” rated PG-13, starring Daniel Craig, Javier Bardem, Naomie Harris, Judi Dench. Filmmakers promise that James Bond’s latest adventure will be as exciting as 2008’s “Quantum of Solace” was dull. And with Javier Bardem as baddie Silva, sporting a hairdo almost as cracked out as the pageboy he wore as killer Anton Chigurh in “No Country for Old Men,” we’ll choose to believe them. Don’t let us down, Javier, you beautiful lunatic.

DRAMA

“Lincoln,” rated PG-13, starring Daniel Day-Lewis, Sally Field, David Strathairn, Joseph Gordon-Levitt. He doesn’t fight vampires in this one, but our 16th president gets a more dignified big-screen appearance in the second movie this year in which he stars. Directed by Steven Spielberg, Lincoln is uncannily played by method actor Daniel DayLewis who is a shoo-in for an Oscar nod, if not a win. Don’t ignore Mary Todd Lincoln, however. Sally Field, in her first big-screen leading role in quite a while, is said to be fantastic as the first lady.

WERECOMMEND “The Royal Tenenbaums”

There’s a lot of Hollywood buzz about Wes Anderson’s “Moonrise Kingdom,” released last spring, which gave Anderson some of the best reviews of his career. Finally, the acclaimed writer/ director could get a Best Picture or Director nomination at the Oscars in February. But who is this guy and how did it all get started? “The Royal Tenenbaums” (2001) was Anderson’s first Oscar nomination (Best Original Screenplay). In fact, Danny Glover, Luke Wilson and Owen Wilson saw the good thing coming — they all turned down parts in “Ocean’s Eleven” for roles in this film. Anderson’s attention as a director and screenwriter to set design, color palettes and other details make his work stand out. But the real draw is his depiction of families and the quirky and sometimes eccentric ways in which they operate. “The Royal Tenenbaums” is likely his best example. Gene Hackman, Royal Tenenbaum himself, leads a family of child prodigies that isn’t as perfect as you might expect. The heart of this dry (some might say dark) comedy is the breakup of the marriage of Royal and Etheline Tenenbaum, played by Anjelica Houston. After abandoning his family, Royal changes his mind and carries us through his peculiar schemes to win his family back. Teaching his grandsons how to jaywalk and shoplift is just one way that Hackman’s character is sure to win you over, even if he might miss the mark with the kids. Don’t wait for the Wes Anderson craze to get ramped up with the February Oscars; put “The Royal Tenenbaums” in your Netflix cue now and get ready. Anderson’s already filming a new movie, “The Grand Budapest Hotel,” to be released in 2014. — Laura Perry

8NOVEMBER2012

AUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

METROSPIRIT 37


WHINE

LINE I can’t believe the way people seat themselves so badly on the public bus. You hog three seats by putting everything on either side of you. Or you sit on the two seater and put your arm over it in such a way you block the seat behind you. You let the kids run wild to run up the steps to the back area, then don’t watch them to help them come down. You don’t pay attention as your kids tug on people’s bags until someone raises their voice to your child. We need an accounting from the Red Cross for their admitted receipt of over $35 million in one week alone post Storm Sandy. I don’t recall a proper accounting for the Haiti donations yet. Let’s make sure the monies are being used as intended. Why is sagging your pants only a black thing? Why don’t us white folks do it too. Lets all do it. Wouldn’t you love to see your boss or your doctor spor ting a sag? How about the waiter that brings your food? In fact lets make it mandatory that if you wear a suit and tie you must sag your pants at least 10 inches. Lets not let the black wanna-be gangster punks have all the fun. I went into that match.com dating website to see what local women are “looking for.” The majority of the women,(95%?) all have two things in common. First, they’re all single, divorced, separated, or widowed (obviously). Secondly, these very same women seem to be overly addicted to religion, church, God, or all three. I guess that good ol’ time, foot stompin’, Southern, Bible-Belt religion didn’t help you with your marriage, eh?

38 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

Eric Johnson looks like he might have too much to do. Maybe you should hire someone to help him out so the quality of his product will improve. So you plop Augusta in name only as a brand or logo and not count it officially in the name of the consolidated university of Augusta. That stinks! I can’t believe how many people want a questionable and careless person for a sheriff simply because. Yet another baby bearer who ends up killing and mutilating their child. And you abor tion foes prefer this to abor tion? A tor tuous death versus a human end to a life obviously unwanted or unneeded? Romney, come Tuesday night after you lose, be sure to kiss some grits as you eat crow and humble pie. Dang, yet another young person killed in accidental gun use. Will gun owners please secure their weapons and educate any younguns of their abode to not handle firearms? A BIG RAVE for President Obama. He’s a truly big man with a big hear t to spend his time with Storm Sadie victims and the governors and mayors to reassure them of help. His hear t shows he’s truly for the people and unselfish and we need four more years of him! Thank goodness for Josh Ruffin. He does a

WHINELINE@THEMETROSPIRIT.COM

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Have something you want to get off your chest? Send your whines to whineline@themetrospirit. com. If you do so by noon on Friday, you might just see it in the next Thursday’s issue. Oh, and whines may be edited for content but will pretty much be printed exactly as you type them.

great job educating people on the ploys of the wicked Republicans. Keep on “Joshing” us! So, this is Nit Witt Mitt’s plan: he wants to CUT YOUR TAX DEDUCTIONS for your mor tgage interest, your child’s education, your child care cost, your charitable donations (there go those “Compassionate Christian” conservatives again) and your health care cost. I guess this is how he plans to pay for the TWO TRILLION DOLLAR MILITARY BUDGET INCREASE! Middle class and poor families will be the hardest hit by Mitt, while the rich will hardly feel it at all (they just won’t give as much to charity). If you haven’t figured it out yet: when you pay taxes and you have deductions, that means you pay less tax. If the deductions are taken away, you will be paying MORE TAXES! Nit Witt Mitt plans to cut taxes all right, but NOT FOR YOU AND ME (unless you are very rich)! If you would vote for someone who will over stuff the pockets of the rich (oh, yeah Bush’s TAX CUTS FOR THE RICH will become PERMANENT promises Nit Witt) with the hard earned money of the working middle class then your just as big a Nit Witt as Mitt is! It’s comical to see all these women vote for Romney. How easily they were brainwashed by their father. Bless your hear ts!

do you think you can just change the rules as you please? Maybe you keep your cell phone too far up your ass and you’re used to it capitalizing for you. Technology is taking a lot away from us. Don’t let it take our proper writing skills. DWTS has become so maddening unless you love Shawn Johnson - yes, she is talented, but now 2 of the best DWTS dancers and choreographers have danced with her. The judges love her. I say get it over with but please RIP the idiot singles show! Until then, go Kelly and Val, go Gilles and Peta. I think one reason crime is so bad in this country is because the punishment isn’t harsh enough. Plea bargains and probation is barely a slap on the wrist, while many of the victims have suffered more than the criminal himself. Many of these wor thless thugs have a better life and benefit from a couple years in prison, with “three hots and a cot” PLUS cable tv, and are healthier and more street wise than when they went in... almost a vacation. Lets step up the punishment. Chain gang, twenty years for second offense, caining. Find a way to make them not want to offend again. And hey, they used to hang horse thiefs, why not car thiefs.

What is it with these coneheads whiners that don’t capitalize at the beginning of a sentence. Of course The Whine Line is just a casual thing and nobody’s grading it, but wasn’t that the first lesson in writing class? Are you too lazy to press the shift button, or

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40 METROSPIRITAUGUSTA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1989

8NOVEMBER2012


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