studentvoice
James Germalic CHAMPION OF CHRISTIANS
Hard work, effort, character should trump ability when judging Bauserman LANTERN Columnist PATRICK MAKS maks.1@osu.edu
For the record, I like Joe Bauserman. I don’t know the dude personally, nor do I plan on trying to be buddies with him anytime soon. I don’t know what kind of leader the redshirt senior quarterback is in the Ohio State locker room or who he is at practice. I don’t know his attitude in the weight room or his dedication through the grueling 6 a.m. workouts in February. Nor do I really know who Bauserman is off the field. I don’t know if he’s doing the right things or trading his John Hancock so he can get as tatted up as Lil Wayne. I don’t know Bauserman. But what I don’t know about
Bauserman helps me figure out what I do know. I do know, at least for the time being, that he wasn’t involved in the tattoo scandal that started it all. He didn’t sell his Big Ten Championship rings or his practice jersey. He hasn’t been foolish enough to whip out of the Woody Hayes Athletic Center onto Olentangy River Road in his Nissan 350Z with ESPN’s cameras rolling on one of the darkest days in Buckeye history. Nor was he immature enough to be shooting an air-compressed gun off the top of Marketplace on a Sunday night. I do know that Bauserman is 26 years old and his birthday was Oct. 4. I know that he used to play minor league baseball for affiliates of the Pittsburgh Pirates. And, like some of you will be quick to point out, I know that he hasn’t performed well on the field. I know that Bauserman was almost more of a liability to the Buckeyes’ offense than an asset. I know that fans cringed when freshman quarterback Braxton Miller went down against Nebraska two weeks ago. I know that there’s a “Bauserchart” which exaggerated his incompletions. And I know that the offense is likely better off without him on the field. But if you’re going to fault Ohio State’s misfortune on Bauserman,
I know you must be, to some degree, crazy. I know he’s not the future of the program. I know, as much as you’ve got to appreciate the time and effort he’s put into OSU’s team, he’s not who I’d want out there calling the signals. It’s nothing personal; that’s just how football is. The best players on the field play, regardless of how much of a cretin they are off of it. Ohio State’s offense is clearly more effective with Miller under center, even despite his one completion in a win at Illinois on Sept. 15. But to label Bauserman as the root of all evil and all problems is, for lack of a better word, stupid. A team doesn’t lose because of one person just the same way it doesn’t win because of one person. It’s one thing to attack effort and entirely another thing to attack ability. The former is a conscience choice and the latter a result of genetics and developed skills. Again, I don’t know Bauserman and I probably never will. But I do know that as long as the effort’s there, the ability (or lack there of) will always come second in my book.
Jackets off to slippery start been proven true. Netminder Steve Mason has struggled in goal with a disappointing .878 save percentage. Backup journeyman, Curtis Sanford, is likely to be between the pipes more this week, as head coach Scott Arniel’s patience could dwindle if Mason’s poor performance continues. Columbus’ goalies haven’t been aided by a great deal of offense either. Offensively, the Jackets have also only converted two goals on 30 opportunities on the power play. The power play should be an area of strength the Jackets when considering their offensive firepower. However, with Carter injured for at least a week, this aspect of their game isn’t likely to improve anytime soon. With 76 games left on the schedule there’s no need to jump ship, although with the fourthworst league attendance at just more than 11,000 fans a game, it seems many fans might already be jumping. Hockey fans in Columbus don’t need to hit the panic button quite yet, however. A team with such a dynamic offseason is likely to have a bit of
LANTERN Columnist
Following an eventful and optimistic offseason, the Blue Jackets have stumbled to their worst start in franchise history. As of Sunday, their record stands at a league worst 0-7-1, and they remain the only winless team in the league. The road ahead isn’t any easier, as they face the undefeated Detroit Red Wings twice, and the one-loss Buffalo Sabres in the week to come. To make matters worse, they’ll be doing so without their big offseason acquisition, center Jeff Carter, who sustained a hairline fracture in his foot after blocking a shot against the Dallas Stars. Carter will likely miss seven to 10 days. Most fans seem dispirited by the historically poor start from the Jackets . However, Bryan Jaynes, a fourth-year in psychology, had a surprisingly encouraging point when he said, “(The Jackets) usually start off well, and drift off” toward the end of the season, so perhaps this year, “we could see the opposite.” Many predicted that goaltending issues would plague the Jackets throughout the season, and thus far, the prophecy has
JAKE CIMPERMAN cimperman.1@osu.edu
sluggish play before the players began to get more acquainted with each other. The team must pick up some wins soon, not only keep their fans interested, but to also their head coach employed. The Blue Jackets next chance to take their first win will come Tuesday at 7 p.m. when they face the Detroit Red Wings in Columbus.
80s film remakes entertain but serve no purpose in furthering creativity, progress LANTERN Columnist MATT KRAUS kraus.86@osu.edu
It’s hardly a well-kept secret that Hollywood relies on recycling old ideas. Remakes and sequels abound while genuinely original ideas are pushed into the art house or tossed out completely. In 2011, this is as true as ever. By the end of the year, 27 sequels will have been released into theaters, which is the most in cinematic history. This year has also seen more remakes than usual, and it’s interesting that Hollywood has chosen a specific era to revisit time and again when it comes to the stealing of material: the ’80s. Just last week, not one but two remakes of ’80s films (“The Thing” and “Footloose”) got their release. In August, a remake of “Fright Night” was released along with a reboot of “Conan the Barbarian.” One of
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the most universally hated came back in April with the remake of “Arthur.” Why are all these old (but not that old) properties getting the quick re-do by modern studios? It’s all about the audiences that movies intend to target. For the most part, new movies are attended by young people on the weekends. Hollywood’s definition of “young people” includes customers that were born in the late ’80s and early ’90s. That means they either weren’t alive or were too young to experience a film like “Footloose” or “Fright Night” the first time around. Therefore, this material is seen as fair game. Hollywood doesn’t care about ruining the memories of older moviegoers. Those are the people who are waiting for the movie to show up on Netflix. By and large, the kids are the ones paying for the tickets. The original ’80s movies don’t mean anything to the modern kids, so why not repackage it in a shiny, modern new box? The studios aren’t entirely misguided. To a child of the ’90s, the original “Footloose” seems incredibly dated. The combination of Kenny Loggins music and overthe-top ’80s attire isn’t the most attractive way to spend your time. Yet as stupid as the film’s story is (a small town bans underage dancing?), there is a lot of fun to
be had if the material is done well. The new “Footloose” accomplishes just that, and thus it works for modern youngsters more than the original Kevin Bacon vehicle ever could. As business, going back to the ’80s is a pretty smart strategy. Creatively, it’s incredibly irritating. Students of film are always looking for movies that present new stories and ideas that haven’t been seen before, so when they see a needless remake of a 30-year-old “classic,” it’s often disheartening. It’s not that these remakes are all bad; it’s just that they aren’t truly contributing much in the way of creativity. Do we want our era to be remembered as one when the boundaries of the medium were pushed, or shall we just be known as the ’80s thieves? These films may be rather entertaining, but they still have no reason to exist.
BLACK // WHITE PARTY
Christian Political Party WILL ANNOUNCE FOR PRESIDENT NEED PEOPLE WITH CHRISTIAN VALUES NEED VOLUNTEERS! Awake!Arise! children, sons and daughters and even
grandchildren of the mothers and fathers that protested Monsanto at the university in the 1960’s. It was said a dark cloud was perpetually over the university because of the tear gas poured on your moms and dads. So don’t be pampered! Actually there’s a documentary that shows it. Recent awakening of social consciousness. Project No. 1 on James’s road to the White House: Rich and Poor. Procession of Hispanics carrying Our Lady of Guadalupe Candlelight vigil from Grant Park to LaSalle Street. Twin of Wall Street, LaSalle Street controls the grain—breadbasket commodity exchange of the U.S. to encourage LaSalle Street traders to generously pour out grain on the hundreds of thousands of starving in Somalia and Kenya. Need volunteers to call Hispanics; need people to come to Chicago to process with us to LaSalle Street from Grant Park. Tell Pharoh (LaSalle Street traders) open up your grain bins for the starving in Somalia and Kenya. (Obama’s dad’s place of origin, 100,000 starving Somalians there.) Then Joseph settled his father and his brothers and gave them a possession in the land of Egypt, Genesis 47:11 After Procession we proceed to yet udetermined place for James to announce for president. Call to sign up 440-886-5371 or fax to 440-743-0414 “Immigrants in Limbo” With a deportation possible, family fears, it would be a death sentence for disabled son. (Chicago Tribune, Oct. 20, 2011, p.A-1.) Then: Boss: Fictional Chicago Mayor Makes for compelling T.V. story, Steve Johnson review in A&E Emanuel, Obama’s Chief of Staff is mayor of Chicago “Perry fights for Spotlight with plan for Flat Tax” Above this article in Wall Street Journal is “Doubts Grow on Euro Fund, More than 100,000 Protest in Greece as Europen officials debate Reserve Plan.” Shows Perry running The Wall Street Journal, Oct. 20, 2011, A-1. Here’s where they’re all at. Subtitle: Hot button. Republican Presidential candidate Rick Perry said Wed. he would push to revise the tax code: meanwhile, his campaign said it would increase reimbursement of supporters for use of private jets. (A4) My supporters sleep on the streets, we sleep in vans, not private jets. Headline under this item: Rolls-Royce Powers Ahead in High-Wage Countries. Obama, you tell the military of Egypt to leave the protesters in Tahir Square alone. I’d like to see them try it here. What hypocrites! Obama* tell the mayors of the U.S. to leave the protesters alone, start with your Chief of Staff, Emanuel who arrested 175 in Grant Park, Chicago. * And Hillary (if she’s involved in this).
Monday October 24 2011