life to buy a replacement (albeit a suspiciously second hand one) at Duty Free.
presumably a seagull (it would be difficult We sat, we talked, we idly texted, we to tell by now), had gone from sentient to checked the BBC Weather App (it was still McNuggets in about three milliseconds via surprised). The charming flight attendant the port engine. He explained we were regave us some champagne. We were quite On this trip, I was heading towards the cheerful. We clapped when Captain turning to the terminal to have the engine UK to sit an exam. An exam I checked. Captain Nick got another round Nick told us we were cleared to was studiously ill-prepared for, My most of applause. take off. We set off. the first exam I had sat in over a immediate decade. An exam I was doomed lesson was to fail. We trundled back to the terminal. As For those of you who have that A320’s we did, we speculated whether his silent never experienced a bird strike co-pilot was similarly calm in the face of on take-off, everything happens On this trip, the plane was can stop a mini crisis or whether one of the flight rather quickly. One second you delayed. really quickly. attendants was, at that moment, trying are hurtling down the runway, the to prize his frozen fingers off the joystick next an engine changes tone to The first sign that you are going whilst he gently rocked in his seat. Who become higher pitched. Then, in our case, to have a delay, after you have already knew? Who cared? We had Captain Nick. we braked, or rather Captain Nick braked, boarded the plane on time, is when the hard. My most immediate lesson was that Captain speaks to you. The level of the A320’s can stop really quickly. We came Back at the terminal, we disembarked. reassurance and length of explanation is to a smooth standstill just before the road. Captain Nick was there to see us descend generally indicative of the duration of the My earlier lunch came to a smooth standthe steps. No co-pilot, but no sounds of delay. If the Captain actually comes into gentle sobbing from the cockpit either. We the cabin to address you, it is going to be a still just before my mouth. commented that we had never experilong delay. Captain Nick Bower came into enced a bird strike on take-off before. He Being a flight from Gibraltar, there was the cabin. It was going to be a long delay. said, neither had he until this year but that no panic, there was, however, immediate this was his second since January. I was “authoritative” speculation as to the cause Delays are not unusual from Gib, particuunsure whether I felt safer in the knowlof our sudden standstill. Some claimed larly during the annual summer migration edge that we had a captain with recent exit was a blown tyre, others that there of French air traffic controllers to their perience in dealing with this, or concerned was something or someone on the road. picket lines. However, Captain Nick said that we had one who had become some I don’t know why but no one seemed in the French were not responsible, instead, bird strike Jonah and we were simply lucky it was thunderstorms over Heathrow. I was the slightest bit concerned and certainly that an albatross hadn’t ploughed no one leapt from their seats in surprised at this news, my friend sat next into the port engine. to me was surprised at this news, and even terror. Perhaps, we were too busy My earlier arguing cause to be concerned the BBC Weather App on my phone was lunch came Back in the terminal, we resumed with effect. surprised at this news (it was convinced it to a smooth the usual waiting position, the only was sunny there). But Captain Nick said it sign of stress being when they ran was the weather and there would be a one The fire engines arrived. The standstill out of lemon for the gin and tonics, firemen got out, they didn’t seem and a half hour delay. It always seems to just before but maybe that was just me. We all concerned either. Then, Captain be one and a half hours, just long enough my mouth. texted our friends and sent them Nick spoke. If you are ever in an to ruin your evening plans, just short blurry photos of the fire engines aircraft in difficulties you want enough to avoid the need for compensaon Instagram. Most of them were unima pilot with a voice like Captain Nick. He tion. oozed confidence; he explained that a bird, pressed, having already read about the event on social media. Another fact about Gibraltar is the speed and occasional accuracy of social media here. It was probably being tweeted before the smoke from the tyres had dissipated. “BA 491 hashtag, all fine, smiley face” or something similar. After a long wait, whilst an engineer (or just man in overalls, it was difficult to tell) decided that the bird had indeed done to the engine what Fred Goodwin did to RBS, it was announced that we were not flying anywhere that night. As I was not in need of overnight accommodation, I was allowed to leave to head home. My friend and his colleagues grabbed the last available rooms at a nearby hotel and we then went out for dinner together. It was a long dinner, by the end of which the stories of our miraculous escape got wilder and the piloting skills of Captain Nick reached Biggles proportions. What was the saddest part of our exaggerations, fuelled by lashings of Dutch courage, was that we were telling these stories to each other, despite the fact we had all been present and really knew that the most we had experienced is the braking ability of an A320. 38
GIBRALTAR MAGAZINE JULY 2016