The importance of empathic listening... BY PRASANN RANADE
E
very day, each student needs to communicate through either the written or spoken word. Entire clubs such as Speech and Debate and Toastmasters have undertaken the task of teaching students to become better communicators. Yet, very few people, and even fewer teenagers, focus on becoming a better listener, in part because of the emphasis put on speaking skills. The spectrum of listening includes various categories such as hearing, paying attention, critical listening and empathic listening. History teacher Esther Lee shared her own different steps in the process of listening. “I’m hearing what you’re saying, I’m agreeing or disagreeing with it, I’m responding to what you’re saying, and I’m posing a question,” said Lee. Of the different types of listening, the one most applicable for students at Lynbrook is empathic listening, or listening
with the purpose of understanding the other person’s views and perspectives. “My goal in empathic listening is to understand your view and perspective from your perspective, not what I think is right or wrong or what I think about it but how you are making sense of the situation,” said Shawn Spano, Professor of Communication Studies at San Jose State University. Empathic listening allows one to broaden one’s perspective and expose themselves to new ideas. For example, many students prefer to sit silently during class discussions or Socratic Seminars in order to listen to others students. “The more you listen, the more you learn and you learn a whole lot more instead of just talking,” said sophomore Shivani Kavuluru, “You start to see things in another person’s shoes. It’s more of an ‘Oh, I didn’t think of it that way’ feeling.” Nevertheless, students do not always listen empathically, either because they have not been taught to listen in such a way, have not been exposed to empathic
listening or do not know how to begin to listen empathically. For example, they may believe themselves to be truly listening in a conversation when actually they simply selectively hear parts of a conversation in order to construct their reply. However, these methods disguise empathic listening. “Empathic listening by de�inition is not about judging; it’s about understanding,” said Spano. “The fact that I’m focused on me, what I think, and my views is a big impediment to listening.” Listening plays a major role in improving relationships with people by increasing trust; therefore, by learning how to listen empathically, one can improve the quality of interactions. “Use your ears and your mouth in the proportion that you have them. God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason which clearly means that you need to listen more and speak less,” said Kavuluru. For the full version of this story, visit lhsepic.com
BY FRINA REDOLOZA
M
outh zipped shut and mind wide open, shyness is a cage that incarcerates opinions and thoughts. The role and signi�icance of shyness comes to play when it concerns participation and communication. “I’m not helping my students if I don’t push them out of their comfort zones,” said French teacher Valerie Amzallag. “I teach them that it’s okay to make errors, it’s not the end of the world if they mess up.” The reason behind silence varies with each person. It may be from the dislike of methods, indifference to the subject, teacher favoritism or fear of judgment. “People are afraid of sounding unintelligent in front of their peers, especially at Lynbrook,” said sophomore Michelle Ng. “Overcoming shyness is for people who
are willing to step out of their comfort zone.” On the other hand, the impact participation has on the grade, the need to express ideas and the yearning to be socially accepted by society are several incentives that stomp out the silence. “If I don’t communicate my needs, it’s harder to get along,” said sophomore Shreya Batra. “When the ideas and opinions I contribute have value, then it could help someone too.” Regardless of the motivation, a common excuse for keeping silent is that being shy is part of their nature. Introversion is often used out of context to mean shy. The true de�inition of introvert is someone who naturally prefers independence and seclusion while the de�inition of shy is to be timid and reluctant. Being an introvert herself, Amzallag believes that introvertion is no excuse not to participate, as participating and communicating are not impossible tasks. “I was an introvert and I am even now,” Amzallag
said. “An introvert can never be extrovert, but participating is a skill that can be learned. Speaking up is an obstacle others may not have, that you have to cross.” The key to subduing shyness it is to truly realize the importance participation has in living life. For example, junior Anvitha Rayabhari opened up more with the change from middle school to high school. “After coming to high school, my best friend and I couldn’t always be together, which is why I had to speak to others,” Rayabhari said. “Throughout the transition, I wasn’t really scared, but I was more anxious and nervous. I am less shy now and I can approach people easily, and vice versa.” Self-proclaimed introvert senior Arkadip Saha has gained a deeper understanding of participation. “I realized that although introverts like me prefer to absorb information, sharing ideas is important too,” Saha said. “In this world, it is crucial to create a balance between listening and speaking.”
SAVE $100
WHEN YOU CALL BEFORE 03/31/2013
7335 Bollinger Road, Suite A Cupertino CA 95014 (408) 996-1200
GRAPHIC ILLUSTRAION BY INDEPTH
...and overcoming the fear of participation